TERMS OF PUBLICATION. THE REPORTER is published every Thurs day Moriiing, by E. 0. GOODRICH, at $2 per annum, in advance. ADVERTISEMENTS, exceeding fifteen lines are inserted at TEN CENTS per line for first insertion, and FIVE CENTS per line for subsequent insertions. Special notices in serted before Marriages and Deaths, will be charged FIFTEEN CENTS per line for each insertion. All resolutions of Associations ; communications of limited or individual interest, and notices of Marriages or Deaths exceeding five lines, are charged TEN CENTS per line. 1 Year. 6 mo. 3 mo. One Column, $75 $4O $3O Half " 40 25 15 One Square 10 7i 5 Estray, Caution, Lost and Found, and other advertisements, not exceeding 10 lines, three weeks, or less, $1 50 Administrator's & Executor's Notices.. 2 00 Auditor's Notices 2 50 Business Cards, five lines, (per year). 500 Merchants and others, advertising their business, will be charged $2O. They will be entitled to I column, confined exclusive ly to their business, with privilege of change. Advertising in all cases exclusive of subscription to the paper. JOB PRINTING of every kind, in Plain and Fancy colors, done with neatness and dispatch. Handbills, Blanks, Cards, Pam phlets, Ac., of every variety and style, prin ted at the shortest notice. The REPORTER OFFICE has jnst been re-fltted with Power Presses, and every thing in the Printing line can be executed in the most artistic manner and at the lowest rates. TERMS INVARIABLY CASH. ®art)s. rTHOMAS J. INGHAM, ATTOR -L NEY AT I.AW, I.APORTE, Sullivan County, Pa. pEORGE D. MONTANYETAT VX TORNEY AT LA IF—Office in Union Block, formerly occupied by JAMACFARLANE.*£ WT. DAYIES, Attorney at Law, • Towanda, Pa. Office with Wm. Wat kins, Esq. Particular attention paid to Or phans' Court business and settlement of dece dents estates. MERCUR & MORROW, Attorneys at Law. Towanda, Penn'a, The undersigned having associated themselves together in the practice of Law, offer their pro fessional services to the public. ULYSSES MERCUR, P. D. MORROW. March 9,1865. OATRICK & PECK, ATTORNEYS AT _L LAW. Offices :—ln Union Block, Towaada, Pa., formerly occupied by Hon. Wm. Elwell.and in Patrick's block, Athens, Pa. They may be consulted at either place. H. W. PATKICK, apU3 W. A. PECK. Uli McKEAN, ATTORNEY <t • COUNSELLOR AT LAW, Towan da, Pa. Particular attention paid to business in the Orphans' Court. July 20. 1866. HENRY PEET, Attorney at Laic, To wan fa, I'a. jun27, 66. W H. CARNOCHAN, ATTOR ' T • NEY AT LAW, Troy, Pa. Special attention given to collecting claims against the Government for Bounty, Back Pay and Pensions. Office with E. B. Parsons, Esq. June 12, 1865. EIDWABD OVERTON Jr., Attor- AJ/ify at Law, Towanda, Pa. Office in Mon tauyes Biock, over Frost's Store. July 13, IsSa. ( OHN N. CALIFF, ATTORNEY O AT LAW, Towanda, l'a. Also, Govern ment Agent lor the collection of Pensions, Back Pay aud Bounty. Aw - No charge unless successful. Office over the Post Office and News Room. Dec. 1, 1864. OD. STILES, M. D., Physician and • Surgeon, would announce to the people of Rum.- Borough and vicinity, that he has perma nently locate. at the place formerly occupied by Dr. G W. Stone, for the practice of his p: ofes sion. Particular attention given to the treat ment of women and children, as also to the prac- , tice of operative and minor surgery. Oct. 2,'66. DR. PRATT has removed. to State street, (first above B. S. Russe!! & Co's Bank). Persons from a distance desirous 1 con sulting him, will be most likely to find him on Saturday of each week. Especial attention will be given to surgical cases,and the extraction of teeth. Gas or Ether administered when desired. July 18, 1866. D. 8. PRATT, M. D. DOCTOR CHAS. F. PAINE.— of flee in GORE'S Drug Store, Towanda, Pa. Calls promptly attended to at all hours. Towanda, November 28, 1860. IMAV'D MEEKS—AUCTIONEER. J All letters addressed to him at Sugar Run, Bradtnr.l Co. Pa., will receive prompt attention. I FRANCIS E. POST, Painter, Tow auda, Pa, with 10 years experience, is con fident he can give the best satisfaction in Paint ing, Graining, Staining, Glazing, Papering, ;<fcc. *3" Particular attention paid to Jobbing in'the country. April 9, 1866. J J. NEWE LL , COUNTY SURVEYOR, Orwell, Bradford Co., Pa,, will promptly attend to all business in his line. Particular attention given to running and establishing old ordispu :ed lines. Also to surveying of all unpatented lands as soon as warrants are obtained. myl7 W r HERSEY WATKINS, Notary • Public is prepared to ,take Deposi ons, Acknowledge the Execution of Deeds, Mortgages, Power- of Attorney, and all other instruments. Affidavits and other pipers may be sworn to before me. Office opposite the Banking House of 8.8. Russell & Co., a few doors north of the Ward House. Towanda, Pa., Jan, 14, 1867. Dcntistrp. THYENTY-FIYE YEARS EXPERI -1 EXCE IN DENTISTRY. J. S. Smith, M. D., would respectfully inform the inhabitants of Bradford County that he is uermanantly located in Waverly, N. Y., where lie has been in the practice of his profession for t!i past lour years. He would say that from his i ng and successful practice of 25 years duration he is familiar with ait the different styles of work done in any and all Dental establishments in ity or country, and is better prepared than any her Dental operator in the vicinity to do work th-' best adapted to the many and different a-LS that present themselves oftentimes to the Dentist, as he understands the art of making his own artificial teeth, and has facilities for doing t.se same. To those requiring under sets of • t;i he vv. ild call attention to his new kind of a k which consists of porcelain for both plate and t-ctb , -.iid forming a coutinnous gum. It is ic durable, more naturai in appearance, and ■" h • -, er adapted to the gum than any other kind of work. Those in need of the same are invited to call and examine specimens. Teeth '■.'vd tn last tor years and oftentimes for life.— ' ' 'urofo. in, rlhtr, and "Nitrous oxide" admin istered with perfect safety, as over four hundred patients within the last four years can testify. I will be in Towanda from the loth to 30th of every month, at the office of W. K. TAYLOR, (i rinerly occupied by Dr. O. H. Woodruff.) Ha ving made arrangements with Mr. Taylor, I am prepared to do al! work in the very best style, at his office. Nov. 27,1865. f)R. H. WESTON, DENTIST Office in Pattern's Block, over Gore's Drug and Chemical Siors. Ijan66 W A RI) HO USE, TO WANDA, PA. Or. Main Street, near the Court House. C. T. SMITH, Proprietor. Oct. 8, 1866. AMERICAN HOTEL, towanda, PA., Having purchased this well known Hotel on or ige Street, I have refurnished and refitted with every convenience for the accommoda i of all who may patronize me. No pains will -pared to make all pleasant and agreeable. M<y 3. '66.— tf. J. S. PATTERSON, Prop. N DER HOUSE, a four story brick k/ edifice near the depot,with large airy rooms, • c nt parlors, newly furnished, has a recess in new addition for Ladies use, and is the most convenient and only first class hotel at Waverly. Y. It is the principal office for stages south ■id express. Also for sale of Western Tickets, and in Canada, on Grand Trunk Rail-way. Fare to Detroit from Buffalo, 14, is cheaper than any other route. Apply for tickets as above to -3-R.kh . C. WARFORD. tate* 8 care °' ® orees at reasonable Waverly N. V.. 0ct.26.1866—3m. O. W. PINE ASSORTMENT OF PRAY ER Books at the NEWS ROOM. ahr fkaifiwil gcptte. E. O. GOODRICH, Publisher. VOLUME XXVII. IN MEMORY Of the old Oaks that stood in the burial ground at Sheshequin Valley. Some per son cut them down to save the head-stones underneuth from gathering mould; thus wantonly destroying a prouder monument than man's poor art could ever build. Grand old trees they were, and ever when the sad thought i_of dying came to us, we said, "Sweet will be our rest under their rustling leaves." Amid their branches the earliest blue bird sang, and in the autumn their leaves nestled lovingly over the sleep ers beneath. O! beautiful, beautiful trees! our hearts are full and our eye-lids dim with tears that we shall behold ye no more! Summers will come, their rare sunshine bringing Harvests of blossoms, and golden sheaves, But never again shall we hear the singing, Oh! beautiful Oaks! of your dusk greeu leaves. Always it seemed that a pitiful sighing Crept through your boughs when we bur ied our dpud, Until we believed it'were sweet to be lying There with the grass and cool shadows o'erhead. Now there are only the white head-stones gleaming, Nothing for beauty left under the sky,— Never again will a summer bird dreaming, Warble her song where the pale sleepers lie. Save for the dear ones who loved us when living, Time as he passes the loss might efface, But ever and ever our hearts must be giving Some pleasant thought to their last rest ing place. How do you know they heed aught of their sleeping Ashes and dust lying under the sod ? This we believe, and glory in keeping, They do remember earth even with God. —SYBIL PARK CULVER. SftUAtH SiiU. SNOWED UP, IT is now some twenty years since, after spendiug my Christmas holi days with the old folks down in Northshire, I found myself one fine morning in early January at our near est railway station, waiting the ar rival of the train that was to bear me back to London and business. Soon it came in sight, and the cheery face of our old servant Bob, transformed through the influence of my father (who was a large shareholder in the line) into chief guard, was thrust out of the window of the break carriage, giving me an assurance of having a pleasant companion during my jour ney to town. The train became '.'ex press " after passing our station, so nothing occurred to disturb Bob and myself, as we sat in his box smoking, until the whistle called my compan ion to his break as we neared Kirton Bridge,some thirty miles on the road. Here two ladies were waiting our ar rival. The younger, a lively girl of seventeen, was, with many cautions and solemn injunctions on the part of her elderly companion, consigned to Bob's special care and keeping for delivery in due course to whomsoev er might be in waiting to receive her at Ilexton, a station twenty miles nearer to London. Bob was well known on the line as a steady, civil fellow, to whom damageable articles, whether in brown paper or petti coats,might be safely intrusted ; and the half-crown slipped into his all unconscious palm, noticed by no one but myself aud the hungry, jealous eyed porter, who had hoped for, but did not receive, a "tip" for his as sistance, would not be lost on an old serving-man if his fidelity ever came to be put to the test. Up to this mo ment the sky had been clear, the air crisp and invigorating, and nothing had indicated any untoward incident on our southward course, though it puzzled Bob to account for the non appearance of the London down train, that should have passed us soon aft er we had quitted Kirton Bridge.— Looking out to discover any signs of its approach, Bob drew his head in again with "Change in the weather, Master Arthur (he had always called me Master Arthur, and would now, poor fellow I suppose, if he could call me anything). Snow yonder, sir," he said, pointing to the hills in a west erly direction, that were already be ing rapidly hid from us by the com ing storm. Hardly had he spoken when the sun disappeared behind the driving clouds, and first slowly, then faster and faster, the snow was upon us iu right earnest. " Reminds me, Bob, of old school days," I said, look ing out at the wintry sight, " when the mail was snowed up, and we got an extra fortnight at home in conse quence." " Ah, Master Arthur,there's no extra holidays for snow now," he said, shaking his head as though he suspected me of wishing that trains were as amenable to weather as stage-coaches. "Slow pace this," he added, rising and looking out; " not short of water, surely ? Why, P de clare, Master Arthur, 't is the snoic after all, my late saying notwith standing. I'm blessed if it ain't thick, aud drifting, too across this open to the westward as though 't would bury you and me, and train and all, ; before we reach Borton, let alone | Ilexton,where we stop iu good-rights, Master Arthur." It was evident that the snow had commenced falling in i these regions long before we had en-! countered it ; here it was, indeed, | falling and drifting with pitiless se verity, and though our engine puffed } and panted and labored, our progress became slower and slower until, just i within sight o/ the little shanty dig nified with the title of Borton Station, we finally stuck fast. The second class passengers—the young lady I have mentioned was the only occu pant of the first-class carriages—be came both alarmed and impatient.— Bob, the second guard, myself, aud the engine-men were assailed on all hands with inquiries as to the cause of the stoppage aud the probability of overcoming it, the uproar ending at last iu the whole of tin* company quitting the train aud making pell mell for shelter into the little station. " Had n't we better look after the young lady, Bob, before she's quite buried ?" I said, as my friend rejoin ed me after assuring the excited crowd at the station that some some how from somewhere a mythical " pi lot " would come to their rescue, and that they would esc ipe with a few hours' detention at the most. Bob clapped his hand to his head, as though a sudden sense of care and responsibility had perplexed him, and then we two commenced wading through the rapidly deepening snow again. When we reached the com partment in which Bob's fair charge was seated, we found her looking a little anxiously perhaps out of the window,but scarcely conscious of the real state of affairs. Being alone, she had not been intiueuced by the panic that had seized the other pas sengers. " Snowed up, miss ; sorry to say can't go no further, miss," said Bob, as he opened the door. The young girl started and seemed for a moment hardly to realize*the condi tion of matters, whilst she waited for further instructions from the guard. Bob hesitated what to suggest, and, as if to gain time, introduced me as I stood rapidly turning into a snow man on the line. " Master Arthur, miss ; old master's son, miss," said Bob, and the young lady bowed gra ciously, whilst I endeavored to look gentlemanly and dignified, and failed utterly. I saw, however, that our young friend could discern the ludi crous side of the situation as well as its gravity, as with a pleasant laugh she inquired, " Well, guard, what am 1 to do then ?" addressing us both at once by her look, as though in many counsellors she might find safety. ." Suppose we were to carry you, miss, this wise," said Bub, taking a cushion off the seat and placing his arms crossways, while he made a feint of clasping mine in like fashion. The improvised chair was soon ad justed, the young lady seated be tween us, and, as well protected as circumstances would admit, was duly conveyed to the station. The sight that there presented itself, however, was altogether the reverse of reas suring,and 1 saw the young girl shrink back as she was suddenly intro duced into the strange company. The station was a mere hut,where but one train each way stopped daily to ac commodate any chance passenger to and from the scattered hamlets that surrounded it. The only other build ings in sight were a couple of single roomed cottages of the poorest class, —the one inhabited by the railway J porter who had chavge of the station, and his wife ; the other by a labor er's family. Already some attempts to ameliorate the hardships of their lot had been made by the snow-bound passengers. A store of firewood had been ransacked, and in spite of the protests of jits owner, a bonfire had been lighted immediately in the rear of the station, round which a group of male passengers stood, essaying to warm their frost-bitten extremi ties ; while as many as could had crammed themselves into the cotta ges, and stood drinking, at prices worthy of a Swindon restaurateur, a dirty-colored liquid that passed for tea, of which several quarts had been brewed from the modest store of gro ceries laid in by the vendors. In the station were seated the more provi dent of the company, imbibing strong spirits from physic bottles, dissecting and devouring pork-pies—the fumes of tobacco everywhere mingling with their indigestible diet. For the most part they were decent sort of folk enough, but disposed—as the manner is—somewhat too readily to disre gard conventionalities when placed in novel and exceptional situations. To rough it lor a night would to one's self be but a small matter ; but to see a well-born, delicate gisl subject ed to its annoyances and inconven iences, aggravated as they were by the too liberal potations of one or two of the passengers, was quite an other affair. " You were going to Hexton, miss, 1 think," said the guard civilly touch ing his cap. The young lady was going to Hex ton. Her mamma lived at Borton Green, six miles from Hexton by the turnpike-road, but not more than half that distance from Borton station ; the pony chaise was to meet her at Hexton, as the express stopped there. Was it likely the "pilot" she had heard the passengers speaking about would soon arrive to take them for ward ? I signalled to Bob to tell her the real truth, feeling ashamed to play false with the innocent,guileless young creature ; so Bob, withdraw ing her to a short distance, told her that no effective aid could come for many hours, and that there was no help tor it but to remain all night in our present comfortless location. I Shall not soon forget the look of determination that came over her face as she said : " Mamma expects me; mamma will be unhappy; I must go to her." Bob and I looked at each other, but neither face indicated a reasonable method by which the feat of walking three miles through such a storm was to be performed by so young and tender a pedestrian. " 1 can walk," she said, " the lane is sheltered ; I know the road well." " Can you not go with me ?" she said to Bob, appealiugly. " Mamma will pay you handsomely for your troub le." But Bob, true to his post, shook his head with, " Can't leave train and passengers, miss ; not for no money REGARDLESS OF* DENUNCIATION FROM ANY QUARTER TOWANDA, BRADFORD COUNTY, PA., MARCH 14,1867. ! nor any other consideration either, miss," he added, with a not ungrace i ful salute, as if to imply a gallant de j sire to serve her irrespective of the I promised reward. I bad felt some hesitation in offering myself as her escort,for I feared to alarm the young girl by a ready proffer of attention on the part of so hap-hazard an ac quaintance. When at last I placed my humble services at her disposal, I saw her take a quiet survey of my i face through her veil, as if to read i iuy character with her shrewd wo manly glance. Then turniug to Bob, ; whose official position gave him a great advantage over me: "You j said you knew this gentleman,l think, guard," she said : " may I trust my self to his care ?" " Lor' bless you, 1 miss," said Bob, us though the ques j tion was almost an insult, " know | him? know Master Arthur? Ay, from : his cradle, miss; and if / may say it," he added, " without offence, we've been friends all our lives, —leastwise, his life, —for that matter, miss ; and if you trust Master Arthur, you trust Bob Martin ; and if you trust Bob Martin, you trusts Master Arthur's father, the very best master ever ser vant had in all Northshire; by whose favor, in the manner of speaking,said Bob holds his present responsible sit uation, miss." This long speech seem ed to satisfy,as it certainly somewhat amazed, the young lady ; so, trusting in the good faith of guard, passenger, and passenger's father, thus incorpo rated in my person, she began to prepare herself for the walk, aud we started just as the dull light of a winter's afternoon was being ex tinguished in darkness. Here and there I saw the snow had been de posited in huge drifts, and iu one or two places it was all but impassible, so I began to fear as the wind rose and the snowflakes fell again, that, whilst our retreat might be cutoff by one drift, our advance might be stopped by another, —tlie lane thus forming a treacherous cul-de-sac into which we were to be lured to de struction. I was grieved to alarm my companion, but was obliged at last to point out the possible danger j of the road. Resting for a moment in a shelter ed spot, we held a council of war.— We would make one more attempt to use the lane, but if that were not safe, we must scale the bank and seek the church path that ran across the fields nearly parallel with it. It would be fearfully rough travelling | upon those open fields, but as a sail | or iwould far rather encounter the j tempest out at sea than upon a lee i shore, so it would be wiser for us to | be buffeted and beaten rather than | run the risk of being buried alive.— : Our resolution had soon to be acted J on. Just as we approached one huge drift, and were seeking to circumnav igate it, the snow seemed to come down faster thau ever, and a blast of wind catching a heap that had been hitherto stayed by some shrubs, hurl ed it into the lane. Seizing my com panion's arm, I fairly dragged her up the sloping bank, and pressed on, knee-deep in snow, in the direction of the path. We fortunately found it, and as it ran well above the level of the field, the snow had left it partial ly.clear, so that our walking was less difficult than we had expected.— But, as if to prevent our gaining any advantage from this cause, the wind and snow assailed us with redoubled fury. More than once did I doubt the possibility of my frail company holding out against it. Our whole strength could hardly prevent us be ing driven off the narrow causeway, while now and then a fiercer whirl would fairly spin us round,aud all but carry us off our feet. Way of escape there was none, no shelter nearer than our destination, no choice but to battle it out with the blinding snow and furious wind, or sink down and perish miserably. But it was a brave girl who clung to my arm, and for two mortal hours struggled so steadfastly ; not a demonstrative, gushing maiden, made all for flowers and sunshine ; not one, perhaps, who would attract notice in the crowded ball room and be specially noticed for her beauty or her bearing,but one that would trudge miles to succor a sick child, or it might be, one day, watch with peaceful suffering pa tience by a husband's couch of ago ny. I was well pleased, even amidst the re d dangers of our position, that Bob's sense of duty had kept him by the train. "This is the 'lone elm,"' she said, at last, as we passed a sol itary tree ; "'Tis not far now, and then—" but her voice was drowned by a hurricane that burst upon us, and for some moments we had to cling together without advancing a step. The "lone elm" swayed to and fro fearfully, now bending almost to the earth, now rising like a strug gling giant wrestling with the blast. Suddenly there came a fearful crash, and a huge limb, torn from the trunk, fell not a dozen yards behind us. I instinctively caught my companion in my arras, and then, plunging for ward, almost ran till the wind caught us again and whirled us about at its pleasure. Suddenly .however, a light glimmered from a window at a little distance. "0, see the light ! 't is home ! home !" my companion cried. The sight gave us fresh courage, we gained the gate, dashed up the drive, without ceremony or warning open ed the door, and rushed into the hall. From a parlor came sounds of pleasant voices, and odors of viands hot and cheering to the storm-beaten travellers. My companion crossed the hall rapidly, and in a moment, all snow-clad as she was, was clasped in her mother's arms. Two boys home from school apparently, and two girls younger than their sister, came for ward to join in greeting " Polly," for that was the name by which one and all welcomed her. For a few mo ments the delight of seeing her safe amongst them again—and their sur prise, too, for through some misun derstanding she was not expected till the morrow—prevented any ref erence to the means by which her ar rival had been accomplished, or the - nature of her escort. The first greet ing over, Polly remembered her guide, and motioning towards the door, dis covered me to the assembled group standing awaiting their recognition. I saw that the lady of the house was at ouce surprised and not a lit tle tickled at my appearance. As she bowed on Polly's introduction, 1 would fain have responded, but as I lifted my hand to my hat, it clutched a band of snow, even now thawing under the influence of a warmer tem perature, and I dreaded lest I should, by departing one degree from the perpendicular, deposit a portion of it on the handsome carpet. From Pol ly's appearance,l knew my own must be remarkable enough, and I saw that the good manners of the whole party were sorely tested by the strange figure I cut and the awk wardness of my position. " Pray enter," the lady said, at the same time herself stepping for ward to relieve me of my snow weighted hat, and directing her eld est son to deposit my cape in the hall. Meantime Miss Polly was sent off with her sisters to change her wet garments, and, as if to put me at ease, the lady proceeded to examine me as to our adventure. When, as briefly as 1 could, 1 told her of what had befallen her child, I saw how hardly she restrained her emotion.— Then Polly carne in to be embraced once more, and, in common with the rest of the company, to fall to work with most unromantic appetite on the hot cakes and attendant luxuries needed to restore animal vigor to our exhausted systems. So long as I bid fair to i>e but a passing guest, the good lady troubled little about my belongings, but when the snow beat ing against the windows told that it was likely to render my early depart ure, however desirable, an impossi f bility, the careful mother began skil- I fully to investigate the character of the stranger thus suddenly thrown upon her hospitality for an indefinite period. I' was not long before she had a fair knowledge of my family connections, business, and general mode of life ; and then, apparently satisfied, she began to talk on indif ferent subjects until bedtime. With many sage reflections on the course of the day's events, some kindly thoughts of poor Bob passing the night in charge of his train and its troublesome company, and some by no means unkindly ones of the bright eyed, brave-hearted cause of my de tention at Borton Green, I fell asleep, to be awakened at intervals by the fearful howling of the wind and the beating of the still falling snow. All the next day, and the next, and the next, the roads were impassible, and Borton Green was no nearer to Uextou, for any useful purpose, than it would have been at the antipodes. Meantime 1 did my best to be agree able. The boys,confined to the house, were delighted to have an older boy than themselves to share in such amusements as could be enjoyed in doors, whilst Polly, with frank sim plicity, admitted the pleasure she felt at returning the obligation my servi ces had, as she said, imposed upon her. At length, however, the farm ers of the neighborhood, being seri ously inconvenienced for want of communication with their market town, set their laborers to work to clear the Hextou road,by which means my captivity was terminated, and I was able to depart. As I looked back on the events of the past few days, and reflected on the strange chance that had thus introduced me so unex pectedly to new and pleasant associ ations, I could not help wondering whether it was all to end here. Was Ito go away and be forgotten by Polly, and her mother, and the boys, and the cheerful group with whose pursuits and home-life I had been so closely, though bi iefly identified ? Of this, at least, I was sure, that my discreet hostess would cry quits when I was once fairly uuder weigh again, and that I need look for no renewal of our friendship on her in vitation. But it seemed that to her good nature the debt for services rendered was not yet fully paid. My sister must accept vicariously the payment of the obligation to me,— she must visit Borton Green in the spring, and allow them to show their gratitude for my kindness to Pollv. Need I say that, as soon as I reached London, I wrote to my sister a full, true, and particular account of the whole affair, or that Jenny enter ed with a girl's love jot romance into the spirit of the adventure, —> that she accepted the invitation, was charmed with Polly, with Polly's mamma, and everybody at Borton Green ; and, shall 1 say it, most art fully contrived to be invited again at Christmas, when, of course, after Pol ly's experience, an escort was neces sary, and what escort so suitable as her brother ? So the ice once broken, the two families were placed on terms of friendship, and I paid many a visit to Borton Green, till its kind and hos- j pitable mistress left that part of the ; country ; and then—" " But who was the young lady, pa pa? what was her name? what be came of her ?" asks my eldest girl, to whom I have been telling the sto ry ; " where is she now, papa ?" " Ask mamma, Polly." f&~ A New Britain (C't.) woman got tenibly mad with her husband the other day, and to spite him, rush, ed out of doors and sat in a snowbank till she was nearly frozen. Her hus band urged her in vain to return to the house,until the drowsiness began to come over her from the effects of the cold, when he succeeded in remov ing her and thawing her out. From the Toledo Blade. NASBY. Mr. Nasby is Dispatched by the Presi dent and Secretary Seward upon an Important Mission, Similar in its Nature to that of Mr. McCraclcen. His POST OFFIS CONFEDBIT X ROADS, I (wich is in the Stait uv Kentucky,) J- January '2Bth, 1867. ) It wuz a crooel necessity, after all, wich druv me into servis uv His Eggsleucy A. Johnson. Crooel, I say, for whenever he hez a pertikel ery mean piece uv work to perform, suthin so inexpressibly sneakin that Seward nor Randall won't undertake it, they alluz send for me. Welles is alluz willin, but while he hez the dis position to do anythin in that line, he lacks the ability. The others, how ever, hev the ability to do anythin and the disposition to do most things, and therefore I hev bin employed in only extreme cases. The success wich attended Mc- G'racken's mission, endin ez it did in the resinin uv Motley, stimulated Seward to prosecute similar research es into the actooal opinions uv the home crop uv offisers regardin him and his, and my sooprerior, A. John son. Randall wuz applied too to take a tour among Post Masters and sich. Declined the mission indignant ly, with the remark, " Is thy servant a dog or a son uv a dog, that he shood do this thing?" And ez Well es isn't trusted out of Washinton any more, I wuz sent for. The biznis required uv me wuz statid by Seward in his yoosual {u cid stile. It wuz merely to cirklate incognito (wich is Latin for sneakiu) among the recently appinted offis holders and assertaiu ther views up on general politikle topics, but more especially ther feelins toward the President and Sekretary uv State. Jest ez I wuz startin, not at all pleased with the mission, Welles put in his oar. He wuz agoiu to give me instrucshuns ez to wat 1 wuz to do. Welles is a lunatik I never cood abide, and I felt it my dooty to with er him. Transiixin the venerable Sekretary with one uv my most pier cenist gazes, I remarked : " Sir ! in imitashen uv the man who inflicted yoo upon this country, wich wuz not the last uv his acts for wich the country cusses him, 1 propose relatin a little anecdote. Ther wuz wunst a man who wuz inebriatid, aud that he might present hisself in a state ap proximating sobriety to the pardner uv his buzzum, he wuz essayiu to vomit, tryiu thus to relieve his stum ick uv the cause uv the oupleasant nis therein, but he coodent do it. He heaved and heaved but ther wuz no result. At this critikle period another man approached, who re marked kindly that, ef he desired to vomit, his best holt would be to run his finger down his throat. The drunk individooal looked up indig nant at this unwarranted interfer ence with his constooshnel rites.— " Blast yoor eyes, sir," sed he "are yoo or me bossin this yer puke." "This, Sekretary Welles, is the anecdote ; I respek the posishun yoo hold, and dislike sayin anythin disa greeable, but, sir, this is a puke, and 1 propose to boss it myself." 1 startid to wunst,and found things in a highly mixed condition. The folio win is compiled from my reports: In Noo York the Postmasters gener ally are sound. The crops were poor last year, and all kinds uv biz nis bein dull, the Postmasters are generally anxious to hold on. They are, therefore, outspoken in their sup port uv the coz. Them ez wuz men uv good standin and religiously en cliued, before the rupcher between the President and the party wich re doost him, say but very little in pub lic, aud that little they don't say very long. They generally can't see that ther is any partickeler diff erence between the President's plan and the plan uv Congres, aud ther bein so little Congress ought to yield for the sake uv peace. The Dimo crats huldin sich places are loud enough in support uv the Adminis trashen, but good Heaven ! the en dorsement uv sich men is to heavy a load for any party to bear. Now, that I think uv it, I hev at last solv ed the mystery uv our wide-spread defeat last fall. In some Deestricts the Dirnocracy found Johnson too heavy a load to carry, and in the bal ance the Johnson men found the Dirn ocracy too heavy a load to carry. In Ohio, the first place I stopped at wuz Oberlin, the place where the nigger college is located at. I regret to say that the Postmas ter at that pint is a rantin Ablishuist, and in the two hours I wuz there, I coodent find a Conservative Republi can who wood take it. I got one nearly persuaded, but jist as he wuz about to consent, his wife fell a weep in upon his buzzum, and with tetch- < in pathos wanted to know ef he wuz willin, for sich small pay, to leave sich a taruisht name to the four chil dren now born to em and the wun wich wuz expectid ? He repentid and refused. I didn't investigate ez fully ez I might, for ther aint a drop uv likker sold there, and ez my flask give out,l felt that doo considerashen for my health woodent permit my stayiu anothei hour. I recommend the abolitiou uv the offis, or the es tablishment uv a grosery, with a bar in the back room, ez a nucleus around wich the Diraocrisy kin rally. The next place I come to I found ! the Postmaster a suspishus caracter j —very suspishus. Whenever he is i drunk he speaks very highly uv the ' Sekretary uv State, but when sober he avoids politikle matters. I sejest | a raise in the salary uv the offis,that; he kin afford to keep drunk all the l time. At the next pint I interdoost my self ez a English nobleman in disgise, studyin American manners and cus- #3 per Annum, in Advance. turns, and meushuud carebssly that I hed bin to Wasiiinton, and bed bin preseutid to the President and Sekre tary uv State. The Postmaster wuz visably affectid. Glauciu furtively around to see that no one wuz look in, he remarked in a low tone : "My deer sir, don't I beg uv yoo, form yoor idea uv the public men uv Amer iky from them specimens. Don't I beg. The first, sir, is an accident— sich a man cood never hev bin made on purpose. The Second wuz suthin, in his earlier years, but now, sir, now—he's a degraded old man," and he bustid into tears. "Bein deter mined to hold onto his place, he tried at fust to bring the President, by ac cident, up to his level; but that be in impossible, he deliberately let his eelf down to the level uv the Presi dent, and the distance, sir, wuz so great, the Sekretary bein suthin, that the shock, sir, undoubtedly klmct his intelleck out uv him, for he aiut dis played any since. He literally fell among thieves. May the Lord for give Willyum H. Seward for the wreck he made uv his reputashen, for " At this pint the poor man stopt. I happened to pul! out my Lanker cher, and in doiu so dropt upon the floor a piece uv paper wich he seed. It read: "Petroleum V. Nasby, Dr. To G. BaBComb. To drinks dooriu the month uv January at 10 cents per drink $30,00 He looked at my face, and seein that the bill reely belonged to me, fell faiutiu onto the floor, shreekin " I'm McCrackened." I leave the case iu the hands uv the Cabinet. Its aggravatin. Another man openly defied me. He wanted me to take the offis off uv his hands. His children,he sed, wuz made mouths at and skoffed at, at skool, becoz their father wich bed bin a Re publikin, held a Federal ofiis, and his wife wuz defeeted for Presidedt uv the Sewin Society,a posisheu she hed alluz held, on the same akkount. He hed stood it long enuff. Ef he eood ent git it off his hands he'd commit sooicide, and by thus puttin hisself out uv the way make his abuzed fam ily the only reparashen in his power. I sejest he be removed. Sich talk may be safely set down ez incendi iary. Another hed the highest possible I opinion uv the President, and wor shiped the Sekretary. He consider ed his plan uv reconstruction the best wich cood hev bin devised by mortal wisdom. He hed vainly striven to git a nominasheu for an offis from the Republikin party for years, but failed owm to a lack uv confidence. He hev jined the Democracy, but ez they wuz hopelessly in the minority, it woodent hev helped him. He consid ered Johnson's noshuu of fillin the of fisis with Republikius bully, ther be in so few uv that persuasion who'd take em, and he didn't want any ac cessions to the party. Ther wuz now jist enuff to hold the offisis iu the con trol uv the President, and them wuz all the offisis they cood git anyhow. He isn't discreet, but we can't expect all the virchoos at so small a price. None uv us is perfeck— I spose I hev my failins. I shell continyoo my investigashens tho it is dreadful tryin labor. Goin ez I do, thro Abolishen sections, I hev to carry my own whisky, and ez sad experience hez demonstrated, quart flasks won't do. Sometimes 1 hev to lay iu one uv them towns for three hours. I respeckfully submit, that arrangements be made for the transportashen uv a keg uv suste nance to accompany me, otherwise, I shel peremptorily resine. At my time uv life regeler supplies are necessary. PETROLEUM V. NASBY, P. M. (Wich is Postmaster), and likewise Profes sor uv Biblikle Politicks in the Southern Classikle & Military Institoot. DANGER OF RAISING A FAST HORSE.— The Rural Nero Yorker states the fol lowing case,to enforce some sensible advice to farmers, suggested, we pre sume, by the "display of horses," which is fast becoming the most at tractive feature of our agricultural shows : A well-to-do farmer of our acquain tance had the misfortune to rear a really fine horse. The action of the animal gave him great delight, and nothing would do but an exhibition of him among the professionals. He put up his money and won. This gave a higher flight to his ambition, and in duced a bolder operation. Success rewarded his ventures. He neglect ted his farm, imperceptibly acquired habits to which he had before been a strauger.and spurred on by past suc cess aud the machinations of the craf ty,^whose aim it is to fleece the green and unwary, placed his farm in jeop ardy for the purpose of raising money to stake on the result of a race in which his pet horse was to contend for the prize ai.d mastery. The pro fessionals had now got the over-con fident farmer in the precise position desired, and the result was,what they intended it should be, the defeat of the farmer's horse aud the ruin of his owner, The animal changed hands and so did the farm. It was all down hill with the farmer after this. His family was broken up and dispersed, while he, reckless and maddened by disappointment and remorse, found premature grave. THE President of a Western railway advertises for a "conductor who does not know how to steal." No applications. IT is very true that one swallow does not make a summer, hut several of them have been known to produce a fall. WHY do young ladies confess that ritualistic curates are a desirable specula tioh ? Because they are pretty in-vestments. A codfish breakfast aud an india rubber coat will keep a man dry all day. THE world stands by every old lil till it is found untenable, and opposes every new truth till it proves irresistible. COMMON SENSE AND PRESENCE OF MIND. If a man faint away, instead of yelling like a savage or running to him to lift him up, lay him at full length on his back on the floor,loosen the clothing, push the crowd away so as to allow the air to reach him, and let him alone. Dashing water over a person in a simple fainting fit is barbarity. The philosophy of a fainting fit is, that the heart fails to send the proper supply of blood to the brain ; if the person is erect, that blood lias to be throwb up bill, bat if ljing down it has to be pro jected horizontally, which requires less power, as is apparent. If a person swallow poison deliber ately, or by chance, instead of break ing out into multitudinous and inco herent exclamations, despatch some one for the doctor. Meanwhile run to the kitchen, get half a glass of water in anything that is handy, put into it a teaspoonful of salt and as much mustard, stir it in an instant, catch a firm hold of the person's nose, the mouth will soon fly open, then down with the mixture, and in a sec ond or two up will come the poison. This will answer better in a large number of cases than any other. If by this time the physician has not arrived, make the patient swallow the white of an egg, followed by a cap of strong coffee (because these nullify a large number of poisons than any other accessible articles)as antidotes for any poison that re mains in the stomach. If a limb or other part of the body is severely cut, and the blood comes out by spirts or jerks, be iu a hurry or the man will be dead in five minutes ; there is no time to talk or send for a physician ; say nothing, out with your handkerchief, throw it around the limb, tie the two ends together, put a stick through them, twist it around, tighter and tighter, until the blood ceases to flow. But stop, it does no good. Why ? Be cause only a severed artery throws out blood in jets, and the arteries get their blood from the heart; hence, to stop the flow, the remedy must be applied between the heart and the wounded spot—in other words,above the wound. If a vein had been sev ered, the blood would have flowed in a regular stream, and on the other hand, the tie should be applied be low the wound, or on the other side of the wound from the heart: be cause the bloocUn the veins flows towards the heart, and there is no need of so great a hurry. JUST I.IE THERE AND COOL.—I went to the Legislature last year, said a Georgian. Well, I went to Augusta and took dinner at a tavern. Right beside me at the table sat a member from one of the back towns that had never taken dinner before at a tavern in his life. Before his plate was a dish of peppers, and he kept looking at them. Finally, as the waiters were very slow bringing on things, he up with his fork, and in less than no time soused one into his mouth.- As he brought his grinders down on it, the tears came into his eyes At i last,spitting the pepper into his hand | he laid it down by the side of his | plate, and with a voice that set the I whole table in a roar, exclaimed, "Just lie there and cool." WHO'S THE FOOL ?—Some merchants went to an Eastern sovereign and ex hibited for sale several very fine hor : sea. The king admired them and I bought them ; he moreover gave the ' merchants a lac of rupees to purchase more horses for him. The king one day in a sportive humor ordered the vizier to make out a list of all the fools in his dominions. lie did so, and put his Majesty's name at the head of them. The king asked why. He replied, "Because you entrusted a lac of rupees to men you don't know, and who will never come back." "Ay but suppose they should come back ?" "Then 1 shall erase your name and in sert theirs." I FUN, FACTS, AND FACETIAE. A "seedy" institution—the Agri cultural Bureau. THE last place to look for the milk of human kindness is in the pale of civiliza tion. A little five-year old heai ing tin text given out at church, "And the child waxed strong" asked, "Father how did they wax him ?" "PRAY, excuse a bit of sarcasm," said Smith to Jones, "but you are an infa mous liar and scoundrel." "Pray, pardon a touch of irony," replied Jones, as h > knocked him down with tin poker. A compromise with sin is a sun. n der to the devil. lIE who pretends to reason with the dead is deaf to reason. AN impenitent sinner has no lUO,V right to sin than a saint. "PADDY, why don't you get youi ears cropped V They are entirely too" long for a man." "And yours," replied Pat. "ought to he lengthened ; they are too short for a mule.' LOOKING glasses won't lie, but they tell some awful plain truths now and then. "Will you let me drill you ?" said the crowbar to the rock. "I'll he blasted if I do," was the hardy reply. "SAMMY, my son, how many weeks belong to this year V" "Forty-six, sir." "Why, Sammy, how do you make that out?" "Ihe other six are Lent.'' NEITHER purity, virtue nor liberty can long flourish where education is neg lected. THE tongue is an instrument on which human thoughts are played. HE who has to deal with a block head hath need of much brains. HE who hath good health is young, and he is rich who owes nothing. WHY is a letter like a flock of sheep ? Because it is penned and folded. To Adam and Eve, Paradise was home; to the good among their descend ants, home is Paradise. DEBOW, the statiatican, has been pardoned, so we may not expect to apply to him the words of the old negro melody, "Hang up de fiddle and Deßow." WHAT song does a hasty eater re mind you of? "When the swallows homeward fly.' WHY is a bald head like Heaven ? Because there is no more dying or parting there. "You are quite welcome" as the empty purse said to the shilling. IF you would look "spruce" in your old age, don't "pine'' in your youth. NUMBER 41.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers