DJLUR PER ANNUM INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE. TOWANDA: Thursday Morning, February 10, 1859. Stledtb sotfrn. [From the Atlantic Monthly.] AT SEA. The nieht is mnilc for cooling shade, for silence, and for sleep ; And when I was a child. I laid Mv hands upon my hreast, and prayed, And -sink to slumbers deep ; Childlike as then, 1 lie to-night. And watch my lonely cabin light. Each movement of the swaying lamp Shows how the vessel reels : o'er the deck the billows tramp. And all her timbers strain and cramp With every shock she feels, It starts and shudders, while it burns, And in its hinged socket turns. >"nw swinging slow, and slanting low, It almost level lies ; Vnd yet 1 know, while to and fro I watch the seeming pendule go With restless fall and rise. The steady shaft is still upright, Poising its little globe of light. 0 hand of Cod 1 O lamp of peace ! 0 promise of my soul 1— Though weak, and tossed, and ill at ease, Amid the roar of smiting seas, The ship's convulsive roll. 1 own, with love and tender awe. Yon perfect type of faith and law ! A heavenly trust my spirit calms. My soul is filled with light: The ocean sings his solemn psalms. The wild winds chant: I cross my palms. Happy, as if, to-night. Under the cottage roof, again, 1 heard the soothing summer-rain. |Bisct Ilaitmis. [Written for the Reporter.] GLEANINGS FROM OLD TIMES. OLD EPITAPnS — NT. I. Tombstones are sometimes great flatterers ; to read the following, one would think that the Virgin Queen of England was a saint; his tory now speaks very differently of her In in-raeli's Curiosities of Literature, is a letter of hers, which shows her natural vanity of dis position. she claims in it 110 beauty of face but much strength of intellect; her environment vas the secret of her greatness. The epitaph here given is taken from the church of St. Hallows the less. " !f royal virtues ever crowned a Crown; If ever Mildness shined in Majesty ; If ever Honor honoured true Renown ; it ever Courage dwelt with Clemency ; If ever Princess put all Princes down For Temperance, Prowess, Prudence. Equity; This, this was she, that in despight ol Death, Lives still admired, adored Kliznbeth. Many daughters have done virtuously but thou ex cellest them all." In a book above her picture : Thev that trust in the lrd shall be as Mount Zion, 1 ich shall not be moved." On the right side : Spain's I tod. Home's Ruin. Netherlands' Relief, Heaven's Jem. Earth's joy, World's wonder, Nature's Chief." On the left side : Britain's Blessing. England's Splendor, Religion'? Nurse, and Faith's Defender, ynecn Elizabeth dyed 24th March, 1602. IVe may with reason suspect that the above 'a- written before Elizabeth " came to finis ' rid of time." Here is one ou a worthy custom-house officer, frtainly not written by his successor. What remarkable collection of epitaphs we should ■on have, if government officers should now 'rite those of their predecessors ! Imagine e President in '<>o, writing an epitaph on the '.seut inhabitant of the White House ! ■ Our Holt, (alas!) hat stint his hold, Bv Death called hence in Haste. Whose Christian name being Christopher With Christ is lietter plae't. in Santon born, of gentle Race, In London spent his Daves ; A elerke that served in Custom House, In credit many Wayes, So that we lesse the Losse, Of this so ilearea Friend, Whose life well, while he was here, Hath gained a better End." Tiie next is from a very old almanac : '' Here lyeth the body of Sir John Calf, Three times Mayor of lanidou. Honor! Honor! Honor!" A wag thus completed it: " Oh Deatli more cruel than Fox, I'iil not let this Calf grow to be an Ox, That he might feed among the Thorns, Ami with his Brethren wear Horns, Horns! Horns! Horns!" "lie writer of the following does not appear uve entertained a very high opinion of flie ■ ter sex." Those who believe in dreams, 8 trea-tire this up as satisfactory evideuce : ' Margarita a jewel I. 1 I'ke a jewel], tost by sea and land. Ain bought by Him, who weaves me on his hand. .'lit, two dreams made two propheticals, Thine of thv coffin, mine of thy Funeral, it women all were like to thee. We men, lor wifes, should happy be." church of St. Albaus, in London, 8 the next: " To Sir William Stone. A- to the Earth, the Earth doth cover, s '> under this Stone lyes another, *>f iliiant Stem*, who long deceased, Lrc the World's |/>vc him released No niurh it loved him." l or brevity this, from St. Michael's is almost '^uallecl : ' Here lyetli, wrapt in clay, The body of William Wray", I have no more to say." •e following is an example of a singular epitaphs, at one time quite common: '■ r v D T I) r os nguis irus ri-ti ulcedine avit j- . 11 *a M Ch M I, die capital letters of the first and last figments the second, aud we up ■ros aaguts dims tristi dulcedinc pavit, || I " mirus Christi wnl.edine lav it." 3>Hb!n >i4X °os introduced into England the Win 1 l , )ur ' a ' ' n churchyards. So savs Indeed, up to the time of the Sax THE BRADFORD REPORTER. ons there were no large towns in England, and of course no graveyards. I shall have some thing to say, on that disputed question, as to the existence of London when the Romans in vaded Britain, in a future article. The old Britains buried their dead here and there as affection prompted, beside some gentle stream let, or in the shaded nooks of the forest; they seem chiefly to have loved small eminences.— The stranger wandering over the fields and through the woods, would come upon some nameless grave ; its loneliness, to those uncul tured and lonely men, may have been eminent ly interesting—a type of their life—a type of the silence, the mystery beyond the grave ; but however strong the associations, which rise to the mind from a nameless grave, the silent but peopled cemeteries, have a sweeter, a more chastening influence—we have baptised the latter with beautiful names, " City of the Si lent." " City of the Dead." Often, in the long hazy afternoons of summer, have I lingered in one of those cemeteries ; there was one spot very dear to us, an old tomb, built of roughly hewn granite, shaded by thick fir trees—it was a retired spot. Few but those who loved to meditate ever passed through the narrow walk before it ; in it slept one of the old Puritans, long ago gathered to his fathers ; there, 011 the stone steps which led down trom it, we rested—dreamed of the sleepers around us— talked of the dead and the living ; of the sun shine and the darkness; till the large black eyes of La Spirituelle would moisten with tears. She felt that her puth was sloping downward into some such resting place. Like one who is to be among strangers, strives to forget her old home and love her new, she strove to love that silent land. Very tender are those re collections ; very beautiful is her face in the mirror of memory, seen through its mist of tears. E. Everybody has a partiality for dinner, and one of the most frequent expressions at a din ner table is the one which forms our caption, and in order that onr renders may know some thing of the substance they are using, we will tell them a tew facts about salt. Salt is a che mical compound of twenty-three parts by weigt of a beautifully silver white, but soft metal, called sodium, discovered by Sir H. Davy, in 1807, and thirty-five parts of a pungent, yel lowish green gas, called chlorine, discovered by Scheele in 1774—these two combined, form this, the most widely diffused and useful of any one compound in the world. It is found in the sea, and in the rocks, from which our principal supply comes. The most wonderful deposits are in Poland and Hungary, where it is quar ried like a rock, one of the Polish mines having been worked since 1251. These Polish salt mines have heard the groan of many a poor captive, and have seen the last agonies of many a brave man, for until lately, they were work ed entirely by the State Prisoners of Austria, Russia, or Poland, whichever happened to be in power at the time ; and once the offender, or fancied hindrance to some other person's ad vancement, was let down into the subterranean prison, he never saw the light of day again.— So salt has its history as well as science.— Other large deposits are found in Cheshire, England, where the water is forced down by pipes into the salt, and is again pumped up as brine, which is evaporated and the salt obtain ed. To such an extent has this been carried, that or.e town in the " salt county," as it is called, has scarcely an upright house in it, all the foundations having sunk with the ground, to fill up the cavity left by the extracted salt. In Virginia there are beds of salt, and the Salmon Mountains, in Oregon, are capable of affording large quantities of the same material. The Lriue springs of Salina and Syracuse, are well-known, and from about forty gallons of their brine, one bushel of salt is obtained.— There are also extensive salt springs in Ohio. The brine is pumped up from wells made in the rock, and into which it flows and runs into boilers. These boilers are large iron kettles set in btickwork, and when fires are lighted under them, the brine is quickly evaporated. The moment the brine begins to boil, it becomes turpid, from the compounds of lime that it con tains, and which are soluble in cold, but not in hot water ; these first sediments are taken out with ladles called " bittern ladles," and the salt being next deposited from the brine, is carried away to drain and dry. The remain ing liquid contains a great quantity of mag nesia, in various forms, and gives it the name of " bittern," from the taste peculiar to mag nesia in every form. " Hut how did this salt come into the rock ?" is the natural query, and the wonder seems greater when we recollect that salt beds are found is nearly every one of the strata com posing the earth's crust, This fact proves another, that as the majority of these salt-beds have come from lakes left in the hollows of the rocks by the recedence of the sea; the sea has through all the geologic ages, been as salt as it is to-day. Let us take the Great Salt Lake as an illustration, it being the largest salt lake in the world, but by no means the only one, as such inland masses of saline water are found over the whole earth, but as ours is the great est in extent, it will form the best example.— is situated at an elevation of 4200 feet above the sea, on the Rocky Mountains, and has an area of 2000 square miles ; yet high as it is, " once upon a time," as the story-books of our juvenility used to say, it was part of the sea, which retired, by the upheaval of the rocks, and that basin took its salt water up with it. Should this in time evaporate, and its salt be come covered with mud and sand, and the land again be depressed ; then, at some distant fu ture age, the people would be wondering how the salt got thore, little thinking that the Mor mons had ever built a city on its shores when it was a great salt lake. There are also how ever, salt rocks taking their place in regular geologic series with other rocks, interspersed between red sandstone, magnesian and carboni ferous strata ; these we can only account for, as wc do for other stratified rocks, viz: that they were deposited from their solution in water or carried mechanically to the spot where now PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY AT TOWANDA, BRADFORD COUNTY, PA., BY E. O'MEARA GOODRICH. " The Salt, If You Please." " REGARDLESS OF DENUNCIATION FROM ANT QUARTER." found by that ever mobile liquid. We fear we should be accused of an attempt to put our readers in pickle, so we will stay our pen, hop ing they will remember these bits of informa tion when next they say. " The salt, if you please."— Scientific Amtrimm. KINO SOLOMON'S BLACKSMITH. —And it came to pass when Solomon, the son of David, had finished the temple of Jerusalem, that he called unto him the chief architects, the head artifi cers aud cunning workers in silver and gold and in wood and ivory and stone —yea, all who aided in working on the Temple of the Lord, and he said unto them : " Sit you down at ruy table ; I have prepar ed a fea&t for all my chief-workers and artifi cers Stretch forth your hands, therefore, and eat and drink and be merry. Is not the labo rer worthy of his hire ? Is not the most skill ful artificer wbrthyof his honor ? Muzzle not the ox that treadeth out the corn." And when Solomon and the chief-workmen were seated, and the fatness of the land and the oil thereof were set upon the table, there came one who knocked loudly at the door, and forced himself even into the festal chamber. Then Solomon, the King, was v.roth and said; " What manner of man art thon ?" And the man answered and said "When men wish to honor mc they call me Son of Forge ; but when they desire to mock me, they call me blacksmith ; and seeing that the toil of work ing in fire covers me with sweat and smut, the latter name, O King, is not inapt,and in truth thy servant desires 110 better." " But," said Solomon, " why caiue you thus rudely and unhidden to the feast, where none save the chief workmen of the Temple are invited ?" " Please, ye, my Lord, I came rudely," re plied the man ; " because thy servant obliged me to force my way ; but I came not unbidden. Was it not proclaimed that the chief workmen of the Temple were to dine with the King of Israel f" Then, he who carved the cherubim said : " This fellow is no sculptor." And he, who inlaid the roof with pure gold, said : "Neither is he workman in Due metals." And he, who raised walls, said : " He is not a cutter of stone." And he, who made the roof cried out : "He is not cunning in cedar wood ; neither knoweth lie the mystery of uniting pieces of strange timber together." Then, said Solomon ; " What hast thon to say, Son of the Forge, why should I not order thee to be plucked by the beard with a scourge, and stoned to death with stones ?" When the Son of the Forge heard this he was in no sort dismayed ; but, advancing to the table, snatched up and swallowed a cup of wine, and said : " O King, live forever ! The chief men of the workers in wood and gold and stone, have said that I am not of them, and they have said truly, I am their superior, before they lived I was created. lam their master, and they are all my servants." And he turned him around, and said to the chief of the carvers in stone : " Who made the tools with which you carve?" Aud he said ; " The blacksmith." " And he said to the chief workers in wood: " Who made the tools with which you hewed the trees of Lebanon, and formed them into pillars and roof for the Temple ?" And he said : " The blacksmith." Then he said to the artificer in gold anil ivory: " Who makes your instruments by which you work beautiful things for my Lord the King?" And he said : " The blacksmith." " Enough, enough, my good fellow," said Solomon, " thou hast proved that 1 invited thee, and thou art ail meu's father in art. Go wasli the smut of the forge from thy face, and come and sit at my right hand. The chiefs of my workmen are but men—thou art more." So it happened at the feast of Solomon, and blacksmiths have been honored ever since.— Jjtmdon Magazine. I VORV. —The old books say—in a story which without further explanation, is transmitted to most of tha new ones—that " a great part of the ivory imported is from the tucks of dead elephants," which are found lying in marshes and jungles. Wc are not able to say how far this is true, but it seems impossible that it should remain much longer true, and we should lide to know the facts about this interesting matter. It is really interesting, because a sup ply of ivory, derived from dead material, must, at some time be exhausted, and the cessation or material reduction of the supply would com pel a curious change in many manufactures, and many habits of life. Several years ago it was estimated that the consumption of ivory in English Sheffield alone, (where it was used for knife handles, and the like,) was equal to the tusks of twenty-tiro thousand elephants an nually. Such ft s'uughter, if the ivory were derived from elephants killed for the purpose, would soon reduce the supply to a minimum. The chief supply from the tusks of dead ani mals—for the remains of the niamoth and oth er creatures, not elephants, furnished ivory tusks —is, we believe, from the Northern part of Eastern Siberia, where the tusks of the mam moth, and other animals, arc found in large quantities. This is called "fossil ivory," al though of course, it is not fossilized. The par ticulars of the course of this trade, aud its re sources, would be worth looking up. OLD Squire J , of Addisop Co. Ya., was famous for bringing to market a better article of cheese than any of his agricultural neighbors which occasioned a merchant to inquire how it happened. " I think I can tell you the secret of it," said the Squire. " You may have noticed that, when the milk stands a while in the pans,there fs a thick kind of ytUnw scum that rises ou the top of it. Now some women are so dreadful ncitt that they skim all this off, but ray wife ain't so particular, but stirs it all in together, and r-c-a-ly I tbiuk the cheese is all the better fir it." Remarks of Mr. Grow on'the Homestead Bill. In the House, January 2fith, MR. KKI.SEY, from the Committee on A gricaltu re .'reported back, witli a reeom niendation that it do pass a bill to secure homesteads A actual settlers on the public domain ; which was referred to the Committee of the Whole on the state of the Union, and ordered to be printed. MR. GROW. I move to reconsider the vote by which the bill was referred to the Commit tee of the Whole on the state of the Union Early in the last session I introduced this bill, which provides for granting homesteads on the public domain, and I also introduced a bill to provide that hereafter the sales of the public lands shall he confined to actual settlers for ten years after they have been surveyed. Those bills were both referred to the appropriate com mittees. Twice, during my term of service in Congress, a bill similar in aii its provisions to this one, lias passed the House of Representa tives, and twice it has failed in tlie Senate. As the propriety of granting homesteads to actual settlers on the public domain is a question that lias been very fully dismissed in the House for the last eight years, and in which I have taken not a little part ;*I do not propose, therefore, to trespass now upon its attention longer than to enable me to make a single remark in expla nation of the reason of t iiiv motion ;as I ?was engaged when the m tion to refer was put, and did not know that the report was made. In mv judgment, the land policy of this coun try should bo Drought back to thc c priiiciples of sound legislation on this subject, as laid down by General Jackson, in his message in 1842, that you should cease to look to the public lands as a source of and that thev should be set apart and secured, in limited quan tities, as homes for actual settlers. Believing that that should have been the policy in the first disposition of the public lands, I trust that this Congress will restore the Government to that policy, aud that the public lamh will here after be secured in limited quantities to actual settlers, instead of being left, as t hey now are. to be absorbed by the capital of the country in a vast system of landjmonopoly. It is unnecessary, I trust, to argue with any gentleman on this floor that the deadliest, direst curse that can be inflicted onjthe new States or upon any country is a system of land monopoly. It palsies the arm of industry and paralyzes the energies of a nation. It has been tried in the Old World, aud its fruits are written in the sighs and tears of its crushed millions. It has been tried there sufficiently long to satisfy the most skeptical that the condition of the new States will be greatly improved if you will se cure and guard the settlers forever against a system of land monopoly in the public domain. By securing the land to the actual settler, you will not onlj confer a bkssing upon the new States, but will add in the most substantial manner to the greatness and glory of the Re public. By the Constitution, Congress is made a trustee of these lands, to administer them ina way that will best promote the general welfare. How can this be done in any better way than by placing upon them actual settlers, who, by the cultivation of the soil, will dcvelope its re sources and convert the haunts of savage life into a home for civilized man, and " make the wilderness bloom and blossom as the rose?" ly the present land system the settler is obliged to go far intothe wilderness,or to pay to the spec ulator, who has purchased from the Govern inent the more desirable locations, four or five dollars per acre in advance upon the Govern ment price of the land. What is the injury thus inflicted upon the labors of the country and the developements of its great intercsLs? Under and by authority of your existing laws you per mit to he extracted from its hard earnings tour, five, six, or eight dollars per acre, to be paid into the pocket of the speculator and non-resi dent landholder, to be squandered too often in reckless and prodigal extravagance. Under the existing system, the actual settler gets his land in comparatively few cases atGov erment price ; but that is not the greatest evil he has encounter. By these lands being held by non-residents, the actual settlers are of ne cessity thrown further apart, thus making it more difficult to have schools and churches,and to surround their homes with all the adjuncts of a nobler and better civilization. Let tlie laud system be so fixed that the actual settlers can take from the Government these lands as a homestead, by paying the expenses of the land office, or ut the Government price, as pre emptors, and they are secured thereby in the means of making compact settlements, opening and constructing public roads, and building school-houses and churches, aud even railroads, and in supplying all the wants of a thriving people and growing civilization ; and you will require no grants of alternate sections to open the wilderness. Four or five dollars per acre would amount to the sum of eighty or a hun dred thousand dollars in each township that yon take from the settler, under the operation of existing laws, and pay over to the specula tor. And this legislation you call just. It is of such legislation that the settler complains. Why not leave this large nmount of earnings in his own hands, with which he may open the avenu.s of trade, surround his home with com fort, and rear his children honored and respec ted members of society ? In addition to the justice of securing to the actual settler a homestead in order thus most effectually to develope the material interests of the country, it is required by every dictate of humanity. If yon would elevate the race, make it wiser and better ; the first and most impor tant step in its advancement is to surround the fireside with comfort. It is in vain you at tempt to beckon on the weary prilgrim of this world to a higher existence, and arouse in his bosom the nobler elements of his nature,unless you place within his reach the means for satisfy ing his present physical wants. I would not, however, have the Government converted into an almshouse to relieve all the distresses of men. It cannot, I grant, alleviate the mani fold woes of the race ; but so far as it is with in its constitutional power, I would have it so administered that it should add as much as ]>os.si hie to the comfort, happiness, aud welfare of of the race. 111 the disposition of the public lands you have it in your power tc secure that object,to a great extent,by securing to the actual settler a choice of home on the public domain. At present the public lands are openpd in large quantities, to to be purchased by the speculator, who, of course, seeks the best locations in the newly surveyed districts, and the actual settlers are thus pressed further into the wilderness, unless they pay enhanced price. Secure to the actual settler those lands nearer to civilization, and leave to hiin his earnings, with whieh to stir round his home with comfort and make his fire side happy, and you will have overcome one ot the greatest obstacles in elevating, purifying, and ennobling the race. The man whose days are dragged out in procuring a morsel to sus tain life, ami whose last prayer, as lie falls bro ken-hearted into his kennel of straw, is that he may never behold the light of another day, is a poor subject for the missionary of a purer and better state of existence. "(to say tu the raxing sea, be stilt; Hiil the wild, lawless winds, obey thy w ill; l'reaeh to the storiu, and reason with d<.-sj>uir ; Hut tell not misery 's son that lift- is fair." If you would elevate and reform, begin with purifying the influences of the domestic fireside by first making it comfortable and happy. I hope the motion to refer will be considered, and tliat this bill may lie put upon its passage. 1 therefore move to reconsider the vote by which the bill was referred to the Committee of the TV hole on the state of the Union ; ami upon that motion 1 demand the previous question. Poverty Essential to Success. If there is anything in the world which a young man ought to he more grateful for than another, it is the poverty which launches us in life under very great disadvantages. I'ovcrtv is one of the best tests of human quality. A triumph over it is like graduating with honors at Oxford or Cambridge. It demonstrates mental stamina. It is a certificate of worthy labor faithfully performed A young man who cannot stand this test is not good for anything, lie can never rise to affluence or station. A young man who cannot feel his determination strengthened as the yoke of poverty presses upon him, and his energy rise with every diffi culty which poverty throws in his way, had better never etter the lists with the champions of self-reliance. Poverty makes more than it ruins. It ruins only those who ure destitute of sterling energy of character ; while it makes the fortunes of multitudes whom wealth would have ruined. Now, if any young man with a good fortune, and in the possessiou of that which is commonly called an excellent opening in life, reads this paper, let him be warned in time. His advan tages may be anything but what they seem ; they may turn out to be the bane of his life ; the full jiocket on the long run may lie beaten by the empty purse, for money will never make a man, and never did in the whole course of the world's history. No, young man, if yon are poor, thank Hea ven and take courage. You have the prospect of making your own way in the world. If you had plenty of money, ten chances to one it would spoil you for all useful purposes. Do you lack education? Have you enjoyed but little schooling ? Remember that education does not consist in the multitude of things which a man possesses. What can you do ! that is the question which settles the matter for you. Do you know your business? Do you know men, and how to deal with them ? lias your mind by any means whatsoever, re ceived that discipline which gives to its action power and facility ? If so, then you are more of a man, and ten times better educated, than the youth who lias graduated at college, but who known nothing of the practical business of life. And as to wealth, there ore few men in the world less than thirty years of age, and un married who can afl'ord to be rich. One of the greatest benefits to lie reaped from great financial disasters is the saving of a large crop of young men. They are taught that they must help themselves—tliey get energy of character, and personal enterprise, and industry, in place of a foolish dependence on the wealth which their fathers or grandfathers have accumulated before tliem ; they are made to work, and work gives to their character that nobility and man hood which are not to be obtained without it. In regard to the choice of a profsssion, ev ery young man must consult his own inclina tion. If you adopt a trade or profession do not be persuaded to resign it, unless you are perfectly sati-Oed that yon are not adapted to it. Advice of all sorts you arc certain to re ceive ; but if you follow it, and it leads you into a profefsion that starves you, those who gave you the advice never feel bound to give you any money. You have to take care of yourself in this world, and you had best choose your own way of doing it; always remember that it is not your tjade or profession which makes you respectable, lint that respectability depends on the manner in which you discharge the duties devolving upon you. Manhood, and profession or handicraft, are entirely different thing*. God makes men, and men make lawyers, doctors, carpenters, brick layers, all the trades or occupations of life.— The offices of men may lie more or less import ant, ami of higher or lower quality, but man hood is nobler than any, and distinct from all. A profession or trade is not the end of life ; it is an instrument taken into our hands by which to gain a livelihood. Thoroughly acquired and assiduously followed, a trade is s:ill to he held at arms' length. Tt should not occupy the whole of his attention. So far from it, it should he regarded only as a means for the developc nicnt of manhood. The first object of living is to obtain true manhood, the cultivation of every power of the soul, and every high spiritual quality. Trade is beneath the mail, aud should be kept there. With this idea in your mind, look around you, and see how almost everybody has missed the true aim of life. They have not striven to be men, but to be lawyers, doc tors, tradesmen or mechanics—they have mis sed the chief end >f life, and though they may become influential in their professions, they have failed to make the right use of their ex istence. VOL. XIX. — XO. 3G: Elihii Burritt cultivated the manhood hns was in liiiu until his trede and his blacksmith's I shop ceased to be nsctul to luin. and lib con! 1 get a living in a more congenial way. It is not NCCCS.HIIRV that you XIHMIII be a j " leurneil blacksmith," lait it is npce.vwry that j you should lie superior to your occupation, and I that t< at lain inunhooii t- the great einl of your struggle with the world. Editor Dreaming on Wedding Cake. A bachelor editor out West who had reeciv •ed from the fair hand of a bride, a piece of elegant wedding cake to dreaiu on, thus given ! the result of his experience : " We put it under the head of our pillow, | and shut our eyes sweetly as an infant blessed j wit 11 nil easy conscience, and soon snored pro , digiously. The god of dreams gently touched us, mid presently, in fancy, we were married. Never was a little (alitor so happy, it was 'iny love,' 'dearest,' 'sweetest,' ringing in our eurs every moment. Ob, that the dream had broken oirhere ! But no; some evil genius put it in the head of our ducky to have pud ding for dinner, ju-t to please her lord. In a hungry dream we sut down to dinner. I Well, the pudding moment arrived, and a lingo slice obscured from sight the plate before us " Mv dear,"' said we fondlv, "did you muko this?"" " Yes, love ; ain't it nice ? " "Ulorious—the best bread pudding I ever tasted in my life.*' " Hutu pudding, ducky," suggested my wile. " Oh, no, dearest, bread pudding ; I was always fond of 'ctu." "Call that bread pudding?" said my wife, ; while her lips slightly curled with contempt. " Certainly, my dear. Reckon I've had ! enough at the Sherwood House to know bread pudding, my love, by nil means." " Husband ! this is really to bad. I'lura ' pudding is twice as hard to make as bread pud , ding, uud is more expensive, and a great deal ; better. I say this is plum pudding, sir !*' and I my pretty wife's brow flushed with excitement. | "My love, my sweet, mv dear love!" ex 'claimed we, soothingly, "do not get angry. I 1 atu sure it's very good, if it is bread padding." " You mean, low wretch," firccly replied my wife, in a higher tone, " you know it's plum pudding." "Then, ma'am, it's so meanly put together, and so badly burned, that the devil himself wouldn't know it. 1 tell you, madam, most distinctly and emphatically, and I will not ba contradicted, that it is bread pudding, and tiia very meanest kind, ut that." " It is plum pudding !" shrieked my wife, ag she hurled a glu>s of claret in my face, the glass itself tapping the claret from my nose. "Bread pudding !" grasped we, pluck totiiu last, and, and grasping u roasted chickcu by the left leg. " Plum pudding !" rose above the din, as I had a distinct preception of two plates smash itig across my head. " Bread pudding !" we groaned in rage, an the chicken left our hand, aud flyiug with swift wings across the table, lauded in madam's bosoin. " Plum pudding ! " resounded the war cry from the enemy, as the gravy dish took us w here we had deposited the first part of our dinner, aud a plate of beets lauded upou our white vest. " Bread pudding forever !" shouted we, in defiance, (lodging the soup tureen, aud falling beneath its contents. " Plum pudding !" yelled the amiablespouso as, noticiug our misfortune, she determined to keep us down by piling on our head the dishes with no ger.tle hand. Then, in rapid succession followed the war-cries. " Plum pudding ! " ; she shrieked with every dish. " Bread pudding !" in smothered tones cam * up from tlie pile. Then it was" Plum pudding " in rapid succession, the last cries growing ferb i ler and feebler, till, just as I can recollect, it. | had grown to a whisper. " Plum pudding " j resounded like thunder, followed by a tremeu | dons crash, a-my wife leaped upon the piie with her delicate feet, and commenced jumping up j and down, w hen, thank heaven, we awoke, ami thus saved our life. We shall never dream ou j wedding cake again." j THE RKVOM TION' OK ASTKOXOMV.— Among j the interesting revelations made by Astronomy, is the fact that the analogy between Mars and the Earth is greater than between the enrtlt I and any other planet of the solar system.— | Their diurnal motion is nearly the same ; tlm j inclinations of their equators to the planes of ' their orbits, on which the seasons depend, are : not very different front ours, when compared , with the year of Jupiter, Saturn, and Uranus. | The earth, however, appears to be the more forward of the two, since water would not re main fluid even at the equator of Mars, and ; acoiiol would freeze in ln>. temperatezoue. The j force of gravity on his surface is about one-tenth j greater than at the surface of tlie earth. A body which weighs one |>ound at our equator would weigh ouiy live ounces and six drachms at 1 hat of .Mars ; and were his course stopped, one hundred and twenty one days ami tjn hours j would elapse bet ore he dropped upon the sun. Should sentient beings exist there they seethe sun's diameter less by one-third than wo do ; and, consequently, the degree of light and heat they receive is le>s than that received by u-in the proportion of I to St, or rather less than 1 to 2—liable, however, to variations from tint great eccentricity of his orbit. If their atmos phere be as dense as is supp sed, they cob ably scarcely ever discern Mercury am' Venus which will appear to burrow o! the solar rays ; the earth and moon, however, will a (lord them a beautiful pair of planets, ultimately chang ing places with each other under horned or located phases, but never quj'e full, and tmt more than a quarter of a degree distant from each other.— Sc. .1 clvui . " How are yon Smith ?' says .Jones. Smith pretended not to know him, and answered he-i --; tatinglv, "Sir von have the advantage of me." j" I suppose so. and everybody has that's £ >' common sense "