LIAR PER ANNUM INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE.
:
B irs &an Alumina, 1, 1858.
j gtletfci) fottrg.
I i SONG OF OTHER DATS.
I B t OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES.
■ o'er the glacier's frozen sheet
■ Bathes soft the Alpine rose,
I through life's desert springing sweet,
I * The flower of friendship grows ;
l| A-.d as, where'er the roses grow,
I some raiu or dew descends,
■ nature's law that wine should Sow
I jo vet the lips of friends.
■ Then once again before we part,
My empty glass shall ring ;
And he that has the warmest heart
Shall loudest laugh aud sing.
I Thev say we were not born to eat ;
I Bat gray-hair'd sages think •
lit means,—be moderate in your meat,
I And partly live to drink ;
■ for baser tribes the rivers flow,
I That know not wine or song ;
I Man wants but little drink below,
J I But wants that little strong.
Then once again, Ac.
■ If one bright drop is like the gem
I That decks a monarch's crown,
I One goblet holds a diadem
■ of rubies melted down !
■ ifor Caosar's blazing brow,
'Jfl But like the Egyptian queen,
■ Bid each dissolving Jewel glow
■ My thir-ty lips between.
Then once again, Ac.
Hliehrerian's mound, the Roman's urn,
I Are silent when we call,
My?: still the purple grapes return
I To clusters on the wall ;
H It was a bright immortal's head
They circled with the vine,
I And "'er their liest aud bravest dead
I They poured the dark red wine.
Then once again, Ac.
I M'thinks o'er every sparkling glass
i I Young Eros waves his wings,
■ iad echoes o'er its dimples pass
I From dead Anacreon's string ;
I And, passing round its beaded brim
:-l Theirlocks of floating gold,
I With bacchant dance and choral hymn
I Hcturn the nymphs of old.
Then once again, Ac.
I A welcome then to joy aud mirth,
From hearts as fresh as ours,
Iu scatter o er the dust of earth
:,1 Their sweetly mingled flowers ;
I Ti, wisdom's self the cap that fills,
In -pite of folly's frown,
I And nature from her vine-clad hill's,
1 last rains her life-blo ><l down '.
That once again, before we part,
My empty glass shall ring ;
i. And he that has the warmest heart
Shall loudest laugh and sing.
SlisteUantDns.
j A NIGHT or PERIL.
BY CHARLES J. PETERSON.
'B*a>aniglit in the tropics. The moon had
■j-'. rien, but a thousand stars were out
Our schooner lay almost motionless,
B * slowly lifting with regular swell.—
not a sound to disturb the silence,
wash of an occasional ripple against
B-:F or the impatient whistle of a seaman.
Buerv side of the ocean stretched away un-
Hki in the dim obscurity of the horizon. —-
H-i'ie concave above was unbroken by
except towards the east, where a bank
hung on the seaboard like a thin
B but a spicy odor impregnating
Ht " i that direction, toid the practical sea-
II >i what seemed only a cloud was in
:nd. The beauty and stiiluess of the
*ere beyond description, and even the
of the crew, as they leaned idly over
Bie seemed to feel the dreamy influence
B- hour, and forgot the possibility of
B*W, Mr Thornton, and I sat on the
leek, enjoying the delicious scene.—
we lapsed into silence. The bliss
■f :i S ear her whom I loved, was enough
and I sat wrapt in the deepest reve-
B Suddenly, a piercing cry broke from
It was a cry of alarm, so start-
Id wild that I turned hastily toward
B-" face was paler than that of death, her
parted in terror, her eyes stared
' i ß"". t some object in the distance ; and
pointed in the direction of her look,
ot ß feii Hke an aspen. Instinctively I fol-
B- eye. Far down toward the African
I saw, scarcely discernible amid tho
which hung iu that direction, a long
wired boat; and, though the distance
B : 'h nearly undistinguishable, enough
se > cn to make us certain that it was
with men and pulling directly for us.
to my feet. Label's terror was
,l,u t rause. Our schooner had gone
tiver Gabion, but the night before,
detected signs of hostility on the part
and had escaped massacre only
the cable and pntting to sea.—
*^^ a ' ler daybreak the light breeze had
ar, d we had been lying since in full
° oast 'dusk, w bich stretched
BB 'jofizon, a dark impenetrable line of
A 't l a fringe of white snrf in front.—•
that the negroes had only
l"B^, v 1 n 'ght-fall to follow us ; and that
*i'id arose, we were lost.
B around the horizon. There was
' a breeze. Then I called for a
a "ale. By this time every eye was
crew gathered within a (luurtr
( l uur tr deck, anxiously
Was brought, and 1 belditaloU.
the flames streamed perpeo-
At last it slightly incho-
THE BRADFORD REPORTER.
Ed, and finally flared almost horizontally out
ward from the wick. Simultaneously I felt
on my cheek a nearly imperceptible puff of
air.
" Thank God 1" I cried.
But scarcely I had spoken, when the can
dle burned up steadily again, and our hearts
sank within us.
There is no feeling so agonizing as suspense.
As I watched the candle, my anxiety grad
ually be came so intense that I could hear the
pulsations of my heart increasing in rapidity
and strength uutil they smote on my ear like
the strokes of a force pump. Soon, too,
sounds reached me—they were those of the
quick rolickiug of oars at a distance. 1 started
and seizing a night-glass, gazed at the appro
aching barge, determined to know the worst
at once. I counted no less than thirty ruffianly
looking negroes besides several while men, as
I thought in the boat, and in the cannoes be
hind.
Our owu force, all told, amounted to only
ten. Sick at soul, I shut the glass and turned
to the candle. I fancied that it flared slightly.
Wetting my hand I held it up and felt, yes !
I felt the water evaporating on the palm. I
turned to the light. It now bent steadily
over, and finally streamed out at right angles
to the wick, when it suddenly went out. At
the same instant I heard a slight murmur
in the rigging.
44 All bauds make sail," I said ; 44 here comes
the breeze. Cheerily my lads. It is for life
or death "
The men sprang to the sails, and the glad
sound of the water rippling under our bows
soon met our ears, telling us that we were in
motion. "With a sudden feeling of exhilara
tion 1 turned astern, and it seemed as if we
had already increased our distance from the
foe. Unconsciously I uttered an exclamation
of joy. At this instant I heard a deep respira
tion at my side. The sound proceeded from
Isabel, who, attracted by my words, had read
hope in ray face, and thus given utterance to
her relief.
44 1)o you think we shall escape ?" she said,
eagerly.
44 1 hope so—indeed lam sure we shall," —
I added, willing to say almost more than I
believed. 44 If the wind freshens we shall soon
ran them out of sight."
Her answering look gave me courage to
face a legion of foes. I felt that I could
lay down a thousand lives sooner than suf
fer her to fall into the hands of our pur
suers.
The next fifteen minutes was passed in a
state of the most agonizing suspeuse. At
first, we fancied that the savages were drop
ing astern, and a general feeling of relief pass
ed through the ship. But when I watched the
barge for several minutes, my heart misgave
me, and at most I could ouly hope that the
ruffians did not gain on us. Anxious to con
ceal my fears, I assumed a cheerfulness I did
not feel, and endeavored to divert the raiuds of
Isabel and her father from the contemplation
of their dangerous situation.
At last the breeze almost died out. For
the first time the savages uttered a wild yell,
or rather howl like that of famished wolves at
the sight of their prey. Isabel gave a stifled
shriek, and buried her face on her father's bo
som. Words caunot describe the agony ex
pressed in the parent's look, or in the wild em
brace with which he drew his child to his
breast.
The mate glanced at the now rapidly ap
proaching boat, and coming close to me, said
iu a hoarse voice—
-4lln ten minutes all will be over." We look
ed earnestly towards Isabel. 44 To think of
that lovely girl in the hands of brutal outlaws
or savage negroes."
44 Better death than dishonor," I responded,
understanding his meaning No other word
was said, but we pressed each other's bauds
convulsively.
Weapons were soon distributed, and I made
a short address to the men. I did not pre
tend to conceal our danger. I told theiu they
had no alternative but to conquer or die.—
No allusion was made to Isabel, but a single
glance of my eye towards her was understood,
and each man grasped his cutlas tighter as he
comprehended the silent appeal. When my
voice ceased there was a hush for a second.—
The first sound that broke the quiet was the
rolickiug of the pirates' oars, striking with
fearful distinctness on our ears, and telling by
its increased loudness, how rapidly the foe
gained ou us.
Meantime the fog bank had been creeping
down towards us, and the mist had now grown
so thick that, to the west, it shut out the
horizon completely from sight, though the
stars were still visible higher up towards the
zenith. Nearer us the vapor was less dense,
objects being still visible for some distance
across the water. About a dozen whites were
in the barge ; the rest were negroes.
A earrouade, at ray orders, had been charg
ed, aud was now fired at the approaching fleet.
It missed the launch, but striking among the
canocs behind, sank one. A wild howl of rage
burst from the ruffians, and the barge swept
down towards ns with redoubled velocity.
" I think I can pick off one of those ruffians,"
said Ito the mate. 44 We may disable three
or foar before they can reach us, and every
life will increase our chances. Aou are a good
shot ?"
44 Ah," said he, 44 I will count for one if you
will for the other. Let ns take the two lead
ing oarsmen at once, for the instant they
touch us, we shall have them pouring in, ou
our low decks, like a wave over the kuigbt
heads."
41 Are yon ready ?"
" Ready !" was the response ; and we fired.
Simultaneously with the flash of my piece,
I saw the bow oarsman fall. The mate had
followed my example, and the second ruffian
leaped op, *ith a yell, and tumbled across the
seat. Both oars caught in the water, and
were snapped off at the thwart. For an in
staui the pirates seemed paralyzed, but they
immediately rallied.
44 Again !" 1 cried,
i We fired so nearly at the same instant, tbet
PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY AT TOWANDA, BRADFORD COUNTY, PA., BY E. O'MEARA GOODRICH.
44 REARDLES3 OF DENUNCIATION FROM ANY QUARTER."
there was but one crack of pieces. Two more
ruffians fell ; but the boat still kept on, and
was now within pistol shot.
44 Take off that fellow with the red sash," I
hoarsely whispered. " I'll aim at the cox
swain. One of the two must be the leader."
My was never keener, nor my hand more
firm than at that moment. One might
have counted two while I paused ; then my
piece blazed. My man sprang forward and
fell, struggling convulsively. The mate fired
simultaneously, and the helmsman tumbled
headlong forward, falling on the ruffian I had
shot. There was a howl of lamentation from
the negroes,the rowers stopped, several rushed
aft, all was confusion. The boat shot for
ward uutil almost abreast of us, aud theu lay
motionless on the water.
But the hesitation of the pirates was of
short duration. The cries of grief on the part
of the negroes were exchanged for shouts of
rage. We could see the whites urging them
on. We had barely time to note the horrible
expressions of their faces, glaring with revenge
and the most savage passions ; we had barely
time to level the remaining muskets hastily at
them and fire, though with what effect the con
fusion would scarcely allow us to perceive,
when the bow of the barge grated against our
sides, and immediately a boat hook was fixed
j in the low bulwarks.
At the moment, one of the crew, with a
! blow of an axe, cut the implement in two,
i but as he did so, a stalwart white sprang on
j deck, where he stood, brawny and gigantic,
| keeping a charmed circle around him with a
' cutlass. Instantaneously, like a swarm of
bees, our assailants clustered on the side of the
| vessel, and despite our desperate resistance,
eventually gained a footing.
We now hastily retreated to the quarter
i deck, where we prepared to make our stand.
To reach us the assailants would have to pass J
! the narrow passages on each side of the com- j
pauion-way, and these had, just before, been j
partially blocked up, with such efficiency as !
| time would admit, by water casks that usually ;
I stood 011 the quarter-deck. Our whole force !
J was drawn up within this fortification.
, The piratical leader saw our hasty prcpara-;
! tions, and paused a moment to scau our posi-1
tion. Thus both parties remained for a few 1
| seconds, inactive —eyeing each other as men j
are apt to do when about to engage in mortal
couflict. On the part of the assailants, this
scrutiny was carried on with fechiigs akin to
those with which a tiger watches the prey he
knows caunot escape hiui. Our emotions were
1 those of men doomed to death, and aware of
their fate, but resolved to sell their lives as
dearly as possible. On one side was fiendish
exultatiou, and on the other manly despair.
" Have at them," shouted the ruffian in Eng
lish, suddenly ; and his men, answering with
a yell dashed forward.
" Stand fast, my hearties," I cried, confront
ing the foe at the right of the companion way
while the mate took the opposite pass on the
j left. 44 Strike for yonr life or death."
Of the succeeding minutes I have no dis
tinct recollection. There was a wild clashing
of cutlasses, mingled with reports of pistols
and the shouts of angry combatants, while
occasionally a shrill cry of agony, from some
i one desperately wounded, rose above the up
roar. Our stock of fire-arms were scanty, so
that we had little with which to oppose the
foe except cutlasses, while most of the despe
radoes were armed with pistols. But our de-
I fences slight as they were considerably retard
ed the approach of the enetny.
Iu vain the piratical leader struggled to
I penetrate iuto our little circle. Sustained by
' four sturdy old man-of-war's men, I hurled
! him back on his fo'lowers as often as he at
tempted to clamber over our defences. So
! fierce was the contest in this quarter, that the
cutlasses, crossing each other in strife, formed j
a bridge over me and the pirate, while the j
| blades flashed rapidly and incessantly. The
mate, though hurt, had also maintained his
| ground.
j Three times had I been wounded, one of my
i little party was shot dead, all of us were
! streaming with blood yet still wc maintained
| the unequal combat. But I felt that our re
! sistanee could not be protected much longer.
We had suffered quite as severely as the sava
j ges. But while, for every man they lost,
! there were three to take his place, it had re-
J quired the whole of our little force even at
; first to defend our barricade. Our thinned
numbers could now scarcely maintain their
footing, and, with the loss of one or two more
would be totally inadequate to it. The ca
noes, meantime, were tapidly approaching.
We had just, for the fourth time, beaten
| back our assailants. A fifth attack, 1 feared
would be success!ul. As I thought this, I
cast my eyes hastily around to Isabel, who
sat, or rather cowered, under the shelter of
the compauion-way. Her eyes were fixed to
windward, as though earnestly contemplating
some object. With sudden hope, I followed
the direction of her look.
I have said that the wind died away before
the pirates boarded us, nud since theu, every
faculty had been absorbed in the conflict for
cxisteuee, so that I had not been aware of the
gradual revival of the breeze. Now, howev
er, wlieu the din of battle momentarily ceased,
uiy ears were greeted with the sighing of the
wind among the rigging, and the pleasaut
murmur of the water as it parted under our
bows and gliding along the sides—geutle and
soothing sounds always, but especially so af
the maddening uproar of the mortal strife.
I became conscious also, the very instant
my eyes turned to windward, that the fog,
which I have described as settling around us,
was slowly dissipating, and, although it still ;
lay thick aud palpable along the surface of i
the water, higher up it thinned off, and finally j
disappeared altogether. The object which had
attracted Isabel's attention was a tall mast
rising majestically above tbe fog, not a cable's
length distant, and, though the hull was invis
ible, I saw, with what delight my readers can
imagine, that tbe union jack of my beloved
country was floating at the toast bead.
" Huzzab 1" I cried, 41 Huzzab ! Help is rt
hand. Here eomes oar gallant flag."
Had a thunderbolt fallen at their feet aud
torn up the deck beueath them, the pirates
could not have shown more consternation than
at these words. Every man looked around in
search of the new comer and when the stran
ger was discovered to windward no pen can
describe the expression of amazement and af
fright, which gathered on the faces of the ruf
faius. They stood a moment, as if spell-bound
staring at the tali masts that rose majestically
above the fog, their eyes distending with as
tonishment. As the vessel bore down on ns,
the mist rolled slowly aside ; first her bow
sprit shoved itself out of the fog, then the white
vapor curled along her forechains became visi
ble, aud finally, like a magic picture emerging
from the smoke of an enchanter's tripod, the
whole symetrieal hull ro.->c iu sight, with a row
of teeth frowniug from the open jiorts.
At this sight the negroes no longer waver
ed. A cry of affright broke from them, and
hurrying tp their boat, they tumbled iuto it
pell well, and pushed off, leaving behind, in
their consternation, most of their white com
panions. Availing ourselves of this happy
juncture, we sallied forth, and cut down those
who resisted, chased the rest overboard.
The ship was now close upon us, and iu a
few hurried words, I acquainted her captain
with our situation, and the character of the
fugitives whose boat was rapidly puiling iuto
the fog. Not a second was lost in the pursuit.
The sloop of war glided majestically by, aud
just as she passed across our fore-foot, a
stream of fire gushed from one of her guns.—
The boat flew in splinters, leaving her crew
struggling in the water. We could see, even
at our distance, the wounded wretches fight
ing for a plank, or struggling a moment 011
the water, like wounded ducks, ere they sank
forever. 111 a few minutes all was still iu the
vicinity of the spot where the barge went
down. As for the canoes, they disappeared
at once, the negroes in them making the best
of their way ashore.
GOI.D BOUGHT TOO DEAH.—GoId ! bright,
glittering, tempting gold ! How often art
thou purchased too dear ? How often life,
health,friendship, conscience, and peace of mind
are all sacrificed iu thy pursuit ! How often
does poor, weak foolish uian, forget his honor,
forget those moral principles, early inculcated
by a christian mother, forget his God in the ac
quisition of gold.
That man who leaves his young wife and
prattling babes, who leaves his father and moth
er, all his relations aud friends, his fire-side aud
home, seeks a distant land, it may be an un
liealtliful climate, to amass a fortune sooner
than it could be acquired at home, will buy
his gold too dear.
That man, who, regardless of all truth and
honor, indifferent to tiie comforts aud conven
iences of all but himself, contiuues, year after
year, in swindling his fellow men, under the
mask of business, who cheats all in buying aud
selling, whose only aim in life is the gain of the
41 mighty dollar," is buying his gold too dear.
A inan may, after years of toil, obtain a for
tune, lie may gain his long sought gold, but
how few men, after years of great fatigue and
care,are able to enjoy their long-hoarded gains ? !
How few can appreciate or understand the
many real pleasures to be deprived from the
proper application of their gold, and how many
are only made more miserable iu the possession
than they were while acquiring it. With
health gone ; friends and relatives forgotten
or estranged, during the years devoted entire
ly to self and gold ; he may be the object of
envy to a few, for his wealth ; but to the dis
criminating mind he is an object of pity, on ac
count of his folly, having bartered the noblest
of blessings, for a pile of shining dust ; he can
not enjoy his gold. With a sallow countenance,
an urifeeble gait, a brokeu constitution, lie ap
pears among bis neighbors, astonishing them
for a short time with his wealth, then sinks in
to the grave a victim to the enormous price he
paid for his gold. He lias sojourned in a dis
tant land, he has foregone the pleasures and
comforts of hotne and friends ; lie has exposed
himself to death, and though he has not fallen
a prey iu a foreign clime, he has" merely ob
tained a respite for a few short miserable
months.
Has he obtained an equivalent for this loss
of health or life ? No ! he has purchased his
gold too dear.
. m --
There is perhaps no pain so acute, no
sentiment so huniilitating to the heart of wo-;
man, as the consciousness of awakening dis
trust, when she most deserves to have inspired
confidence.
" How is coal this morning ?" said a purcas
er to an Irishman who was at work in a coal
yard. 44 Black as iver," said Pat.
How TO AVOID QUARRELS. —The late Mr.
John Jones being asked by a friend how he
kept from being iuvolved in quarrels, replied,
44 By letting the angry person have all the
quarrel to himself."
A drunkard upon his death-bed demanded
a glass of water before receiving- diviue con
solation. " Upon one's death-bed," he observ
ed, 44 it is but right to be recoueilcd with our
mortal eucmy 1"
An inquisitive priest having asked a
young lady her name in the confessional, she
replied, with as much of wit as of modesty,
44 Father my name is not siu."
A lady on separating from her hus
band changed her religion, being determined,
she said, to avoid his company in this world
aud the next.
tSf A dandy is a chap who would be a
lady if he could ; but as he can't, does all he
can to show tbe world that he is not a man,
W& There is only one objeotioo to people
who " menu well," and that Is they never can
'pare time to carry out their meaning.
The Stolen Knife.
Many years ago, when a boy of seven or
eight years, there was one thing which I long
ed for more than anything else, and which I
imagined would make me happy. It was a jack
knife Then I would not be obliged to bor
row father's every time I wished to cut a string
or a stick, but could whittle whenever I choose,
and as much as I pleased. Dreams of kites,
bows and arrows, boats, Ac., all manufactured
with the aid of that shiuing blade haunted me
by day and night.
It was a beautiful morning in June, that my
father called ine, and gave me leave, if I wish
ed, to go with him to the store. I was de
lighted, and takiug his hand, we started. The
birds sang sweetly on every bush, and every
thing looked so gay and beautiful, that my
heart fairly leaped for joy. After our arrival
at the village, and while my father was occu
pied in purchasing some articles in a remote
part of the store, iny attention was drawn to
a man who was asking the price of various jack
knives which lay on the counter. As this was
a very interesting subject to me, I approached,
intending only to look at thein. I picked up
one, opened it, examined it, tried the springs,
felt the edge of the blades with mv thumb, and
thought I could never cease admiring their
polished surface. Oh ! if it were only mine,
thought I, how happy I should be ! Just at
this moment, happening to look up, I saw the
merchant had gone toehauge a bill for his cus
tomer, and no one was observing me. For
fear that I might be tempted to do wrong, I
started to replace the knife on the counter, but
an evil spirit whispered, 44 Put it into your
pocket ; quick !" Without stopping to think
of the crime or its consequences, I hurriedly
slipped it into my pocket, and as I did so. felt
a blush of shame burning on my cheek ; but
the store was rather dark, and no one noticed
it, nor did the merchant miss the knife.
We soon started for home, my father giving
me a parcel to carry. As we walked along,
my thoughts continually rested ou the knife,
and I kept my hand in my pocket all the time,
from a sort of guilty fear that it would be seen.
This, together with carrying the bundle in my
other hand, made it difficult for me to keep
pace with my father. He noticed it, and gave
ine a lecture about walking with my hands in
my pockets.
Ah ! how different were my thoughts then,
from what they were when passing the same
scenes a few hours before. The song of the
birds seemed joyous no longer, but sad and
sorrowful, as if chiding me for my wicked act.
I could not look my father in the face for I
had been heedless of his precepts, broken one
of God's commandments, and become a thief.
As these thoughts passed through my mind, I
could hardly help crying, but concealed my
feelings, and tried to think of the good times I
would have with my knife. I could hardly
say anything on my way home, and my fat her
thinking I was either tired or sick, kindly took
my burden, and spoke soothingly to me, his
guilty son. No sooner did we reach home, |
than I retreated to a safe place, behind the
house, to try the stolen knife. I had picked
up a stick, and was whittling it, perfectly de- j
lighted with the sharp blade, which glided ,
through the wood almost of itself, when sud- !
denly I heard the deep, subdued voice of my
father, call ing me by name, and ou looking up,
saw him at the window directly over my head,
gazing down very sorrowful! at me. The stick
dropped from my hand, and with the knife
clasped in the other, I proceeded into the house.
I saw by his looks, that ray father had divined
all. I found him sitting in his arm chair, look
ing very pale. I walked directly to his side,
and in a low, calm voice, he asked me where i
got the knife. His gentle manner and Vind
tone went to my heart, and I burst into tears.
As soon as my voice would allow ine, j made a
full coufession. He did not flog m<g as some
fathers would have done, but reprimanded me
in such a manner, that, while i felt truly pen
itent for the deed, I loved Ir.m more than ever,
and promised never, never to do the like again.
In my father's company, I then returned to the
store, aad on my begged the merchant's
pardon, and promised never again totake what
was not my own.
My fattier id long since dead ; and never do
I think of my first theft, without blessing the
memory of him whose kind teachings and gen
tle corrections have made it, thus fur in my
life, and forever , my last.— Moore's liurul Sew
Yorktr.
44 Governor Gilmer, of Georgia," so
says a Georgian contributor, 44 had a passion
for buying old iron truck, broken down wag
ons, and such rubbish, which he had piled up
in the yard, under the impression that it wo'd
come Into use some time or other. It annoyed
his wife excessively ; and one duy, when the :
governor was away from home, she had the |
whole pile carted off to auction. It so hnj>- :
pened that just as the auctioneer had put up
the lot, the governor was riding by, and buy i
he would, for, as he looked at it, he declared i
that he had a lot at home in which there was i
several things to match. He bid ten dollars, I
and the whole concern was knocked down to
hiin. A few days afterwards, he was ndmir
ing Mrs. Gilmer's new bonnet and asking her
its cost, she said "ton dollars, husband ; the :
same ten you paid for your own old iron, and j
if you don't clear it out of the yard, I shall j
sell it again !" The Governor shortly after
that retired from the iron business."
Wsy*' 4 Look here, ma !" said a young lady,
just commencing to take lessions in painting,
44 see my painting ; can you tell me what it
is?" Ma, after looking at it some time an
swered, "Well, it is either a cow or a rosebud
—l'm sure 1 can't tell which."*
To find out the number of children in
the street, commense beating on a bass drum
To find out the number of idle men, start g
dog-fight
B®* 4 Some lore to roam o'er the dark sea
foam," as the crab said to the nautilus
vol- XVIII. —NO. 43.
Yankee Courtship.
Yankee courtship, in the country, is a " pc
ctilinr institution," and the parties at first
sight are as shy as rabbits. Sally generally
sits in the chimney corner, beside the dye pot,
knitting stockings, and Jonathan sits iu the
opposite corner, eating apples, snapping a seed
occasionally at his sweetheart, and looking at
the pictures in the fire. Thus they will sit
and say " nothing hardly'' until late iu the
evening, and Jonathan thinks it time to go
home, when he will put on his hat, and depart
with some such remark as this : " Well, Sal,
I guess I'll better be gittiu' along. It's hog
kiilin' to-morrow, and I've got to be up right
smart airly.'
" Good night, Jonathan ; call agin," is
the response of Sally ; and she puts up her
1 knitting-work and goes to bed.
" Hit," says Joshua (her name is Mchit
able, but we call her Hit for shortness,) after
sitting up with her till near midnight without
saying a word. " I don't know much about
courting, but ef you'll just step behind the
door, I'll tell you suthiu':" and Hit stepped.
Riding out, one day, in the old chaise, with
Sally by his side, Jonathan, after going about
three miles without speakiug, ventured a side
glance ; and, observing that Sally, overcome
by the beat, was " apparently" usleep, be be
came venturesome. Her bead gently recliued
on one side, aud her pouting red lips were just
parted sufficient to show a glimpse of the pear
ly gates within. Jonathan's heart went pit
a-pat. The temptation was too great. Sally
would never know anything about it : so,
leaning toward her, he stole from those beau
tiful portals some of their nectar. Salij was
not " flumuxed" a bit, and Jonathau ventur
ed again and again, until she awoke, when,
stretching her arms, and giving a yawn, she
broke the silence with : " Jonathan, what
aire you a doiu' on ?"
" Nothing, hardly," responded Jonathan.
" 1 know you aire, ueow, for I can feel it
jest as plain as day."
" Wall, ef you don't like it," says Jona
than, " I guess I won't tech you agin."
"Wall, neow," replied Sally, " I didn't
speak as to that ; I was only thiuking how
sly you was abeout it, that's all."
It is supjiosed thefe was a mutual adjust
ment of difficulties " all reound." There is an
amount of gallantry about Jonathan occasion
ally, that challenges admiration ; while, at
the same time, there is an " amazing sight" of
" calculation" mixed up in the matter. Onco
.upon a time, he was crossing a toll-bridge in
company with his gal. When he came to the
toll-house he [Milled out a cent aud paid his
own toll, at the same time sayiug, '* Sally, I
guess you'd better pay for yourself, for I don't
kuow's I shall have you yet." Careful and
considerate ; but we suspect he made a pru
dent, saving husband, and Sally did not think
any the worse of him for his economy, either.
On another occasion, he visited Boston iu
company with his intended, for the purpose of
seeing the 4th of July celebration, lie was
mighty pleased with everything he saw, espe
cially tlie " sogers." He expressed himself
satisfied with the Common, but thought it was
a pity to let so much good land lie idle ; cal
culated how many cords of wood the " big
tree" would make, aud expatiated upou the
propriety of '• divening" the frog pond.
At length the appeals of hunger brought
his thoughts down to the subject of food ; and
approach ~ig one of the numerous stauds for
refresh meats, which are always found around
the Common ou the 4th of July, be took a
sir.vey of its contents, consisting of lemonade,
mead, egg-nog, 9pruce-beer, apples, coeoanuts,
dough-nuts, buns, candies, giugerbread Ac.,
of which latter article lie purchased a three
cent hunk, and immediately commenced de
monstrations upon it. After taking a mouth
ful or two, he turned to his sweetheart and
| exclaimed : " Sally, that is atuaziu* good !
Why don't you buy a piece for yourself ?"
" f guess I got some to hum better'n that.
I don't like to eat such stuff 'ithout I kuow
whose hands have bin iu it."
j " Wall, you can make proper nice cake,
| Sally, when you set about it—and seeh sweet
cake, too—almost as sweet as somebody I
know."
" Xeow you get eout,"
! "Shantdew it."
Ah, what is so charming as rustic simplici
ty ! as Marin Sugeblossom used to say ; and
she was a famous woman in " Old Berkshire."
A RRACE OF BOY'S COMPOSITIONS.—A dis
tinguished Georgian lawyer says that in bis
younger days he taught a boy's school and re
quiring the pupils to write comiosition.s, ho
sometimes received some of a peculiar sort, of
which the following is a specimen :
"Ox INDUSTRY. —-It is a bad for a man to
be idol. Industry is the best thing a man can
have, and a wife is the next. I'rophcts ami
kings desired it long, and died without thq
site. The End."
Here is another :
"Ox THE SEASONS. —There E; t ft Wse-ou*.
spring, summer, autumn a„<i wirier. They
are all pleasant. Some ]>eop)& like spring
host : but as for me gixe me liberty ox givo
me death. The End.' 1
IDOLATRY CHINA. —Some years ago,
picture of Vfie Emperor Napoleon was found
in a Cb-nese Imt, and the people were wor
shipping it as a god ! missionary at Hong
K jng used to conduct worship with the chil
dren of his school in a room where there was.
a clock standing ou the chimneY-piece. One
of the boys for a whole year thought that
this clock was the missionary's god, and that
the prayers he da.ly offered were addressed
toil.
A clergyman was recently rebuked by
a broth# tof the < loth for smoking. The culprit
replied that be nsed the weed in moderation
" haf do you coll moderation 7" inquired the
other. " Why. S ir ," said the offender ' '
cigar a' a time."