Pittsburg dispatch. (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, June 12, 1892, Page 4, Image 4

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THE :PITTSBURQ-' DISPATCH, SUNDAY,'1 ' JUNE ' 12, t 189a
je Bigpfrlj.
ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, 166
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November, 1857. as second-class matter.
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PITTSBUI'.G. fcUNDAY. JUNE 15, 1891.
THE ISSCE DOMINATES.
A day's reflection after the convention
emphasizes the fact that the campaien
will ne one of measures rather than men.
The Republican party is planted squarely
on the platform of developing home in
dustries by protection and extending our
foreijrn markets by the judicious exten
sion of the reciprocity policy. The Dem
ocratic party is hopelessly committed to
the free-Trade heresy, and the prospects
approximate certainty that its candidate
will represent solely the policy of tariff
reduction. With the issue thus clearly
drawn the question who heads the ticket
will not wigli very much in deciding the
voice of the people.
It will take little time for the public to
perceive that where the prosperity and de
velopment of our industries is involved
the campaijm will stand on exactly the
same basis as that of 18S8. This must re
produce the active and vigorous fight of
that year, with the same result set up as
the coal of the race. Disappo Intments as
to personal preferences and soreness over
the recent fight must disappear when the
pressure of the issue makes itself felt
While a majority of the people doubtless
preferred Blaine, the fact that Harrison
equally stands for the maintenance of the
protective system will unite the party
solidly for him. Before the magnitude of
the measures to be decided by the cam
paien all other political considerations
must bp obliterated.
The Republican party is in the field with
the ticket and the platform of four years
aco. Every man who takes a moment to
consider the situation will recognize the
fact as entitling it to the popular support
which it obtained in that year.
THE GREAT GAVEL, QUESTION.
One of the echoes of the convention
comes from Nebraska, whence Mr. Dan
Freeman writes to the nation to say that
Sir. Walker, who presented that gavel to
the Chairman of the convention, applied
to him for timber and was refused. Hence
the country is informed that "if the gavel
Js cenuine it was obtained without my
knowledge or consent and is therefore
stolen property."
This startling assertion suggests two in
quiries which the National Committee
may feel called upon to investigate. First,
has Mr. Dan Freeman, of Homestead No.
1, entry No. 1, of Nebraska, an exclusive
monopoly of all the timber ever grown
en that tract; second, whether if the gavel
was a surreptitious one, or a fraudulent
gavel, of ordinasy wood it was any more
ineffectual in whacking the tumultuous
convention to order than if it had been
genuine; and finally, whether there is not
a good deal of humbug about the gavel
business anyhow.
CO-OPEKATIV.E DWELLINGS.
Elsewhere in this issue will be found a
plea for the introduction of the co-operative
system of housekeeping in Pittsburg,
in one or other of the forms that have
proved highly successful in other places.
There is an immense opening in this neigh
borhood for the suburban-park-terrace-club-aggregations
of dwellings, and still
more for the erection of buildings within
the city to be occupied on the co-operative
apartment principle. There is a peculiar
demand for small residences of this kind
by the population of Pittsburg. We have
too few small houses and too much board
ing house life. There are hundreds, one
might safely say thousands, in this city
of ours who do not care, or can
not afford, or are unable from
one circumstance or another to under
take regular out-and-out housekeeping
in the city. There are others again who
long for a country residence, but cannot
get it because the expense is too much for
them as an individual undertaking, or be
cause it is feared that the wife would be
lonesome during the long absences of the
husband necessitated by dwelling away
from the smoke and blackness el the city.
The terrace idea advocated by the arti
cle referred to would cheapen the cost of
housekeeping and insure opportunities for
social intercourse. But the greatest need
in this direction is for the erection of flats
in Pittsburg itself. The number of people
seeking well-arranged conveniences of
this kind guarantees a profitable, return
for the investment Since capitalists for
some undiscoverable reason shrink from
this form of enterprise, the small people
should sec what they can achieve by a
union of their strength.
THE ASIALGAMATED HOLIDAY.
The workers in iron and steel enjoyed
their annual holiday and picnic at Rock
Point yesterday with more than the usual
zest All the regular means of diversion
by which the operatives in the art of Yul
can have made their festal day famous
m
hroughout Western Pennsylvania and
Eastern Ohio, were on hand and the day
was given up to enjoyment, with a dispo
sition to let the future take care of itself,
for that day at least Nevertheless it is to
be hoped that the members of the Amal
gamated Association enjoyed their outing
so much that they will take up the wage
question this week with imperturbable
good humor. In that frame of mind they
will not find it difficult to convince the
manufacturers that a reasonable settle
ment of the wages dispute is much better
for all parties than fighting over it
WIDENING OCR aiAKKETS.
The progress which has been made in
the work of introducing Indian corn in
Europe shows what can be done by intel
ligent and organized effort to increase the
market for our products. Heretofore the
low price of corn has been largely due to
the fact that there was little sale abroad
for it, the people being prejudiced against
it owing to ignorance of the methods of
cooking it
The first effort to counteract this preju
dice was by the American corn exhibit at
the Paris Exposition where the cooked
products of corn were served in the most
palatable and nutritious form. This has
been followed up by improving the oppor
tunity to introduce corn in Germany, af
forded by the high price of rye and
wheaten flours. The result has been most
gratifying. An increase in tho importa
tions of corn is reported by the consuls at
European ports. Thirteen mills in Ger
many are grinding Indian corn, and others
are preparing to follow their example.
The Berlin and .Dresden bakeries are sell
ing loaves made of a mixture of cornmeal
with rye; and the military bakeries are
adopting a similar course.
Here we have the double benefit of a
cheaper food for the German people, and
an improved market for one of the chief
products of this country. The striking
feature of this work is the very small cost,
as the Government appropriation for tho
work is $2,500 per annum. This is totally
inadequate for expanding the work on any
large scale. But when intelligent effort
makes such a start at so little cost, it is
evident that expenditure directed to the
work of widening our markets can with
honesty and intelligence be made to yield
the richest returns.
A GOVERNOR LIKE HIS PEOPLE.
The report that Governor Tillman, of
South Carolina, in a recent speech de
clared, "I, as Governor, would lead a
party to lynch any negro who would as
sault a white woman," occasions a good
deal of comment The usual view of the
press is that if Governor Tillman said
anything of the sort he is not fit to be
Governor.
The assertion should be modified, so as
to specify that he is not fit to be Governor
of a State ruled by law. It is a self
evident proposition that the Executive of
the law cannot with any conception of his
duties declare in favor of throwing the
law to the winds, and place life and death
at the adjudication of a howling mob.
But the question still remains whether
such a man is not exactly fit to be Gover
nor of a State which prefers to be ruled by
mob law. The stream cannot be purer
than its source, and the Executive of a
democratic system is not likely to main
tain principles which the people will not
support So long as South Carolina pre
fers to be ruled by the mob, so long may
we expect the spectacle to be presented of
her Chief Executive declaring that sober
law and justice must be laid aside and
subordinated to the passions of a brutal
and cowardly lynching gang.
On the whole it is better that it sh ould
be so. It serves notice on people outside
of South Carolina that i they have any
fancy for living or holding property in a
State where they will enjoy the protec
tion of law, they must steer clear of South
Carolina.
RAILROADS AND POLITICIANS.
The tendency to attack corporations un
reasonably was illustrated in the House
the other day by a fight over the proposi
tion that the compensation paid to railroads
for carrying the mails should not exceed a
limit of one-half the amounts paid by
private parties for similar services. The
proposition was not founded on good
sense. The Government can afford to pay
the prices fixed for all interests for legiti
mate services; and if the railroads charge
excessive rates for this class of transpor
tation, there is no public remedy in an ar
bitrarily cutting down the rate paid by
the Government and leaving the people at
large to suffer by the imposition.
But the most remarkable feature in con
nection with the affair was the outcry
raised by corporations like the New York
Tribune and New York Post. The former
calls it an attempted confiscation of pri
vate property, while the latter devotes a
long article to the "political hostility to
railroads." The amount of confiscation
and hostility actually developed is
demonstrated by the fact that
the proposition was voted, down
by the very decided preponderance of 104
nays to 51 ayes. When we review the
connection of railroads with politicians the
same absence of any destructive hostility
is to be perceived. The outcry of corpo
ration organs about "confiscation" is to be
estimated in its true light by a brace of
facts. There never has been a case of
confiscation of railroad property by legis
lation. There have been numerous cases
of confiscation of private property by the
manipulation of railroad rates against the
disfavored shipper.
This may seem to partially explain the
feeling of hostility to railroads which our
corporation cotemporaries regard as so
wanton. Another fact may seem to throw
more light on it There is no hostility
anywhere to transporters by -water
whether on rivers, lakes or ocean. There
is no hostility to drygood merchants, gro
cers or legitimate merchandizers of any
class. Perhaps, if railroad rates were as
clearly governed by the great and ulti
mate measure of what the service ren
dered is worth, the hostility so much rep
rehended would have no basis to stand on.
BRICEVS SANGUINE V1EWH.
The Hon. Calvin & Brice, United States
Senator from Ohio (and Ne.w York as
some people think), contributes to our
columns an interview which will be seen
to take a decidedly cheerful view of things
in general and several subjects with which
Mr. Brice is especially interested in par
ticular. It is satisfactory to be assured by
an authority of Senator Brice's experience
and acumen that things are all right; but
one cannot help thinking that perhaps his
personal relations may have somewhat
tinged his views.
Thus, when Mr. Brice assures us that
the millionaire Senators are really very
hard working legislators, it is grateful in
telligence. As one of the class Mr. Brice
ought to know, and if the millionaire Sena
tors do not commit the error of directing
their energetic labors to the advance
ment of their corporate, or silver,
interests rather than the public welfare,
they can be accepted as useful members
of the body politic Still there is room
left for the opinion that there is some
thing wrong about the political preference
for the laborious millionaires In chosing
Senators, as against mere jurists or think
ers without large bank accounts,
Mr. Brice's views on the railroad ques
tion are also authoritative; but they have
a slight suspicion of partiality. He in
forms us that many railroads are not pay
ing interest on their stocks and bonds.
This"is a well-known feat, but the expla
nation need not be sought outside the
record of the Senator himself. When we
reflect on the fact, -which brought that
gentleman, to fame, of building a railroad,
selling Its stock to the Vanderbilts for
more than the cost of the road, and still
retaining mortgage bonds on it equal to
Its value, it does not appear remarkable
that railroads should not infrequently fail
to earn interest on all that water.
The apparent lack of prosperity for the
railroads does not, however, dampen Mr.
Brice's cheerful outlook. This may be
partially explained by the tact that, while
the railroad corporations may be swamped
or struggling, the managers and pro
moters in them, like Mr. Brice, are able to
lay aside something for a rainy day. Be
yond that is the fact that with all the
drawbacks and abuses of the existing sys
tem thoA country has an unconquerable
productive power, which furnishes the
surest foundation for prosperity.
Finally, Senator Brice assures the public
that there Is really very little corruption
in politics. As Senator Brice Is In a
position to know, if there is corruption, the
assurance is a very satisfactory one. But
if he were cognizant of a large amount of
corruption, would he have told us of it?
A HISTORICAL IMPROVEMENT.
Mrs. Schenley's gift of the old Boquet
block house to the Daughters of the Revo
lution Is an addition to the donations of
that lady for the improvement of the city
which, while less imposing in size and
value than her other gifts, is fully equal to
them in significance and importance.
It provides first for the preservation of a
historical relic which takes the mind back
to the very origin of the city and perpetu
ates the memory of the struggles which
not only gave Pittsburg to the Anglo
Saxon race, but set in motion the in
fluences that created the independence of
this nation. Hardly less important than
the historical character of the gift Is the
provision of enough ground to make a
small park, thus opening the way to the
embellishment of a portion of the city
most in need of such improvement It is
one of the idiosyncrasies of Pittsburg that
its most historic portion has heretofore
been one of its most repulsive in appear
ance. This gift may be the first step to
ward making the Point district as attrac
tive in appearance as it Is rich in historical
memories.
It is to be hoped that the recipients of
the gift will take early steps for the im
provement and embellishment of the plot
surrounding the block house. One of the
steps might be to secure the restoration to
the old building of that stone inscription
which is cow wholly out of place on the
stairway of Municipal Hall.
There is nothing like a National Con
vention Tor emphasizing tho folly of an
overindulgence In the expectations which
Dreed disappointment.
Mbs. Schenley's tranifer of the Old
Block House to the Pittsburg Chapter of the
Daughters of the Revolution is matter for
public gratitude and congratulation. The
ladies into whoso hands the ancient build
ing has come may be relied upon to make
the most of the gift, and the city will be the
richer for the proper preservation of so
valuable and interesting a historical monu
ment. Delegates must! many of them have
. found the atmosphere somewhat oppressive
in their travels from Minneapolis yester
day. If you want to be convinced that women
are more than fitted for the exercise of the
suffrage, just talk to a few of them on cur
rent events. Considerable courage is neces
sary for such an undertaking, but the bliss
lul ignorance to be discovered most con
clusively proves that women ought to vote.
In- the death of its President, Leonidas
L. Polk, the Farmers' Alliance suffers a loss
which will be especially felt this year.
Someone has recently gone to the trouble'
of writing an article ddating on the fact that
the photographic camera brings out all that
Is worst in the subject's appearance. This
was entirely unnecessary, as anyone can
readily vouchsafe who has experienced the
torture of "a sitting." And who has not?
Surely the question of Allegheny City's
division into wards Is a matter under the
j urisdiction of the Orphans' Court.
tAirvOKB short of earthy material for
gardening or other purposes can easily ob
tain an ample supply of the same lrom the
residue lesulting troin straining the "water"
supplied by the city's pipes.
Mabket street's snperb adaptability for
rapid transit purposes is peculiarly conspic
uous in Saturday's blockades.
VACCINATION may be a trifling incon
venience, but it is an excellent safeguard
against dread smallpox, and it is especially
effective when accompanied by scrupulous
cleanliness.
-
"Eyes trade is reviving to help on the
cause of Protection toward success in
November.
Bemembek, remember the Fourth of
July, when speeches are made, and when
skyrockets fly. And send your contribu
tions to the Mayor without waiting to lor
get them.
Minneapolis received a large crowd of
strangers, and most of them were taken In.
Philadelphia punished Pittsburg's
nine yesterday for losing two games to
Brooklyn the day before. This sort of pro
gress will soon land us at the wrong end of
the list.
These are few people lower down in the
social scale than are the "highbinders."
Cabnegie & Co. seem to be making
some striking preparations for trouble,
though it Is sincerely to be hoped that the
precautions taken will prove unnecessary.
The fund for the relief of the Oil Creek
sufferers is far from complete at present.
A PltEE expression of opinion as to the
man to be chosen has crystallized into soli
darity in support of Protection now that the
nomination has been made.
Pbesident
thank you.
Harbison is quite well.
Bock Point must be far enough away
from that which .mathematicians Bay has no
space or magnitude, to judge from the crowd
that got there yesterday.
New Jersey as a Residence Commonwealth.
New York Commercial Advertiser.
The first fatal snakebite of the year is re
ported from Lambertville, and Lambertvillo
is in New Jersey. Between its 'skeeters,
snakes, railroad combines, woman murder
ers and all-the-year-round race tracks, .Now
Jersey seems to dispute with New York sin
ister pre eminence as a residence commonwealth.
-.. . ' .
A MAN UNDER THE BED.
Terrible Commotion Caused by Indulgence
in Fishing Bait' Jack the Leerer Get
ting on the Stage Men Who Can't See
Jokes A Poem.
Frox a STArr correspondent.
It will perhaps not startle mankind
generally to learn that there Is a lady re
siding somewheietdn the West Side in this
corpulent city who looks under her bed
every night before she blows out the gas to
sea whether, some bold, bad man has not
come in unawares and is lying in watt to see
where she puts her false teeth. She has been
doing this, tor no living man dares say how
many summers. Not because she has any
objections to a man, for she Is unmarried
and has not altogether surrendered hope,
but she very properly objects to a man
under her bed. As there are probably very
few women in New York who look under the
bed before retiring, this one is sufficiently
designated when I say she resides in a fash
ionable quarter under the protecting Ting
of a male parent and two bachelor brothers.
Her maid sustains the relation or picket
guard in a small communicating room.
One of the bachelor brothers is of a con
vivial turn or mind and is liable not to come
home nights. The first black bass day of
the season the convivial brother went
a-flshlng. The motion of the water during
the day had the effect of ouiiously turning
his head; so that when he came home early
in the night lie began to divest himself of
his fishing garments as soon as he got Into
the hall, hanging his piscatorial coat on the
newel post and distributing the rest or the
outfit riaht and left as he went up to bed.
This saved valuable time and will serve as a
pointer to those who are prone to fall Into
bed with their boots on.
It so happened that the maiden sister was
doing the society act nrouna me corner arm
came in later, accompanied by her maid.
The former at once discoveied the strange
looking coat flung 'round the newel post
and almost fainted. Hut the maid is of a
more masculine build and temperament,
and came out strong in this emergency.
It's somebody lu the house, ma'am," she
hoarsely whispeied. "Don't say a word an'
we'll get him!"
'But, Laura! Laura! Just think! I don't
want him!" whimpered the mistress. "In
deed, I can't go up therel"
"Then you stay in the drawing room,
ma'am, and I'll go up and wake Mr Charles."
"No, no he might be in the basement this,
minute packing the sliver. I'll go with you,
Laura. I'm Buoh a coward and yo.i're so
strong and biavel"
They stole quietly upstairs. At the head
of the fli si flight they came ncioss another
old garment.
"It's his vest," said the maid "and here's
bis cap," she added, picking up the ill-smelling
headpiece between her thumb and lore
flnger. "Ugb! it smells of flsh!"
"Oh, dear! He must have expected to stay
all night!"
They hesitated just a minnte and listened.
The customary snore from the next floor
back vas leassuiing. "It do sound nice,"
said Laura. "Air. James Is In, anyhow, and
that's more than we have any lights to
expect. Both women braced up. "I don't
believe no burglars come in and throw their
clothes around like this," finally remarked
the shrewd serving girl. "I'll rind ont bo
fore I make a fool of myself," she added.
"Von ro In vour room, ma'am, an' lock the
doors if you want to, I'm going down into
the basement."
With considerable reluctance and some
piotestation the mistress, having first ex
plored the maid's room and her own cham
ber by the full glare of the gas, consented
and the maid went boldly down into the
basement. She found the silver and every
thing else all right and had started upstairs
pgain when an unearthly shriek rang
thiough the house. She flew upstairs two or
three steps at a time and rounded the
second story landing Just as a gentleman in
his night diess armed With amurdcious
looking pistol rushed from tho back bed
room. They telescoped on the curve and
went down with a noise like putting in the
winter' coal.
Oh, dear! Why Mr. Charles!" groaned the
maid. "Don't shoot!"
"You confounded fool!" yelled the old
bachelor, rubbing his bruised bald head
"It's you, is it!"
"Wow! Yowl Murder! Help!" came from
the fiont room, and forgetting their own
bruises both master and servant scrambled
to their feet and rushed to the rescue.
"Heieheis! Un-der-my-bed!" gasped the
half tainting mistress doubled up In a heap
on the floor.
Quick as a flash the bold maid sprang for
the bed and the now thoroughly aroused
batchelor brother catching sight of a dirty
pair of boots thrust the pistol under, shout
ing, "Come out of there or I'll shoot!" And
he grabbed the neaieet boot and gave it a
terrific Jerk and fell back in the floor with
nothing but a boot.
"Wbu-wha-whazzerow "bout?"
It was the other baohelor brother, his
night robe on wiong side foremost, swaying
on the door knob.
"Whaz-all-eiow? Nobody ca-catch flsh 'a
all zH noise! Gimme my boot-watcher
doiu' wi-wi-my boot! Eh? 'Idget yer feet
wntt Lesh noise catch moie flsh zeet
Pass bait, pleashe!"
Talking to One's Self.
One of the interesting sort of human
creatures one meets around town is the man
who talks to himself. Wandering alone In
Lord Byron's solitude not in tho trackless
mountains all unseen:
"But 'midst the crowd, the hum, the shock
of men," he finds inspiration for absorbing
thought. It is possible he may merely think
he is thinking, but no matter. His lips move
with mechanical precision and smoothness.
He seems to be repeating something, as a
schoolboy learns by rote, and this is some
times borne out by occasioual gestures. , It
may bo only an effort to remember the last
parting injunction at home to "now, be sure
don't foiget to order coffee, and two yards
of the same atuff.and stop and ask whybaby's
things weren't sent aioundand " but it is
often clearly an argument of some kind in
which tne logical otder is highly desiiable.
A prominent legal gentlemen downtown
goes out Into the Broadway throng when he
wants to unravel a tough knot. Ho finds
theciond inspiring conducive to thought,
a stimulant to mental activity. The man
who talks to himself doesn't know it. His
mind is at woik and his lips move as if he
woie dictating to his stenographer, or mak
ing his appeal to the Jury, orsaying pleasant
things alter diuuer. As the subject is agree
able or otherwise his face lights up or takes
on serious shadows. You see him smiling and
you cau't help smiling, not wholly out of
sympathy. For tne man who talks to him
self as he passes through the crowd if us
ually the object of good-natuied derision.
Of this, however, he is totally unconscious.
Just stop him suddenly some day and ask
him a simple question and you will see how
long it takes him to come out of his trance.
A novel phase or this labial phenomenon
is the habit of following 11 conversation by
mechanical repetition. I know a man who
repeats what yon say to him, tollowlng you
with a silent movement or his lips. 1 always
feel as though I were dictating to a sten
ographer whilo talking to him as If, some
how, the matter wasatterwards to appear in
print.
Another Jack in the List.
Next to the "Jack-the-Hugger," "Jack-the-KIsser"
and "Jaok-tbe-Ankle-Grabber"
and other Jacks of that ilk, tho Jack who
leers offensively at women is one of the
most incomprehensible specimens of con
temptible mankind. I don't know but what
he ought to come first in our catalogue of
contempt. Laoking the courage of his more
brutal compeers, and having no tangible
goal in sight, his operations are at once more
extensive and indefensible. There is no
rule that can be devised against him. A man
cannot bo arrested for a look cannot always
be even thumped or reprimanded. He knows
this, and this very immunity from punish
ment makes him the quintessence of what is
mean and despicable. While "Jack-the-Leeier"
often has the external appearance
or a gentleman, he peers impudently into
women's faces until I would rejoice exceed
ingly lr .the victim nould suddenly slap the
insultcr in the face.
A few years ago a lady was annoyed by a
man who merely looked at her in tills way
every time she went down Broadway. She
stood it for some time, trying to pay no at
tention, then answeied by an indignant
look. The loafer merely laughed in her face,
and actually took off his hat and bowed to
her, usirin tesponse to a friendly recogni
tion. The next day she passed down at the
same hour, and there on the same corner
was the same man, who again attempted to
speak to her. There was a big man directly
in the rear of the lady this time, however,
and a moment later the loafer got a punob.
in the jaw that laid him out on the walk.
The big man was Inspector Williams, and
the lady was his wile. Unfortunately, such
condign punishment does not always follow
this offense.
But this is an aside what I would like to
know is, what satisfaction do men get out of
this thing T It is simply the index or a low,
brutish natuie, insensible to the appeals of
unprotected womanhood and dead to the
instincts of common polltenessaud common
manhood.
Evidences or a Dlrlne Provldenoe.
In the recent Kansas cyclone a baby was
carried four blocks and deposited on the
grass unhurt. The third instance of a baby
tailing out of a car window without injury
while the elevated tralti was In rapid motion
1 has been duly recorded. A man Jumped off
the new Memphis bridge and came ashore
all right. And yet some people don't be
lieve there is a Divine Providence who
watches over fools and children.
A Question for Dr. Parkhprstt
If Dr. Parkhunt had been "palled"
when he was painting the town, and looked
np the way other men are when caught
under similar circumstances, and brought
berore Judge Duffy inthemorntng, andflned
$5, would he now have a better opinion of
inenew xorKpoiicei And msucn case, now
would the moral situation have been
affected?
A Very Accomplished Family.
Should any unfortunate theatrical
manager need assistance In getting his com
pany on the road, the following modest
missive from an Ohio town received by
Mess. Lltt A Davis may belp him out.
"Gentlemen I shall try & put my re
quest In as few words as possible I enclose
Photo of myself you can see am not a beauty
'or a fright .5 ft. S Inches in weight 150
lbs. have always been Stage struck, have
taken part of 'old woman.' 'voung widow'
& 'old maid' in amateur plays, would like
a pare in 'The Stowaway' or some first class
Dramatic Co. please send Picture back
I enclose stamp have a young Brother that
Is a splendid mimlo of Dutch & Irish &
old man has good voice, can sing dance
some, my Father and I also play Violin &
Piano. be Is leader of opera House
orchestra & No. 1 Violin player all will go
Cheap do you think there would be a
chance lor us to mike a cood living in New
York. Brother also plays base drum in
band please do not laugh at roe but answer
as soon as you conveniently can &
ODlige, Yours tluly.
"My father is slso a first class Baritone
player is leader & director of Band here
arranges all his own music"
The applicant doesn't say that the family
desire to givo the whole show, but the
brother who can do Dutch and Irish, has a
good voice and can sing and dance and
"play the base in the band." Indicates a de
gree of veisatllitv leading up to that. I
think this talented family might "make a
good living in New Yoik." lam concerned
only lor the rest of the profession.
Jokes Meet Resistance Sometimes.
There are men so impervious to humor
that It makes them angry to hear a good
laugh. A day or two ago a gentleman came
out on Broadway with a crutch and a cane.
lie had been laid up several months with a
broken leg, and his friends ne has many of
thom were naturally glad to see him again.
He was looking quite well nnd happy,
thouzh the leg was far from being fit lor
active service. We congratulated him and
asked him how he was getting along.
"Well," said he, "I can't kick."
Of course we laughed. It was the proper
thing besides the Joke wasn't bnd. He
looked puzzled a moment, and thelaugu
was a trifle more decided.
"I dou'c see anything funny," said he
finally, turning red.
The laugh became a shout. Bat he was so
angry one of the crown tried to explain.
Still, ho couldn't see, and was more angry
than at first.
And he was neither an Englishman nor an
Irishman.
A Man Vfe All Enow.
There's the big fat man,
And the tali slim man.
The man of the cocker spaniel sat
The Broadway man,
'1 he Bowery man.
The man at the end of a cigarette.
There's the cross-eyed man
And the hunchback man.
The man with the breath you'U neTer forget :
That sallow man.
That tallow man,
, That man at the end of the cigarette.
CnAnLM Thiodore Mup.rat.
NewYobx, June 11.
PERSONAL FACTS AND FANCIES.
It Is semi-officially announced that Bishop
Potter, of New York, is to teccive the hon
orary degree of Doctor of Divinity from Ox
ford University, England.
The first woman dentist in the world,
Madame Hirschreldt,who afterward became
dentist to the family of the late Emperor
William, was graduated from Pennsylvania
College.
PbINCE Bismabck will attend the wed
ding of his son, Count Herbert, and the
Countess Margaret Hoyos, which is to take
place at the Evangelical Church at Vienna
on the 21st Inst.
Empebob "William will start on a voy
aze to Norway on the 29th of this month.
He will embark at Kiel. A whale hunt will
be organized at the Loloden Islands for his
especial benefit. .
Thbeb dozen sachets,costing'aItogether
about tpq, are includodn Miss Pullman's
trousseau. She has sachets for her gowns,
for her bureau drawers, for her handker
chiefs, her gloves, her veils.
Mme. Boulanoeb, who has returned to
Versailles after a long visit to her eldest
daughter, has not reoccupied the little white
villa which was her former home, but has
taken up her abode at a hotel.
To Chicago belongs the honor of being
the dwelling place of the first colored
woman whoever produced and published a
novel. Her name Is Sarah E. Farro, and she
is 26 years old. Tho title of her book is
"True Love."
A Boston paper states that Pierre Millet,
the sculptor, a brother of Jean Francois
Millet, is living quietly In Boston. In ap
pearance he resembles Henry M. Stanley,
speaks good English, and is a brilliant con
versationalist. Me. Justice Lamar has so far recovered
from his illness of a few weeks ago that he
now accepts dinner invitations. As soon as
his wife returns from the South, they will
start for the White Mountains, where they
expect to spend the summer.
GEOBOE W. CHILDS, Philadelphia's editor-philanthropist,
has undertaken the edu
cation of another bright younggirl. The ben
eficiary this time is Edith.youngest daughter
of the late George T. Lanigan, the well
known humorist and newspaper man.
Miss Elizabeth Mobe, of Edgowood,
Pa., has recently built with her own hands a
neat little cottage, laying the foundation,
doing all th'e carpenter work, and even
plastering the rooms. During some of the
work she found it necessary to don male
attire.
DEATHS HEEE AND ELSEWHERE.
Colonel Polk, President Farmers' Alliance.
Colonel Ij. L. Polk, President of the
Farmers' Alliance, died at the Garfield Hoipltal,
Washington, yesterday morning. Colonel Polk
was a relative of President Polk. He was a native
of North Carolina, where he was born about 53
years ago. Ills education was received in the
common schools. During the war he served for a
time In the Confederate Armr, and resigned to go
to the Leglilature. to which body he had been
elected. Later he filled for several years the office
of Commissioner of Agriculture forNortn Carolina,
and later still he began the publication of tho Pro
gressive Farmrr, which he managed for a long time.
At the time of his death be was serving his third
term si President of the body to which he has
riven 10 much attention and time. Colonel Polk's
home was at Raleigh, N. C. Colonel Pulk was of
great value to his party ai a stump speaker, and
was an able writer on topics of particular Interest
to farmeri. The People's party will meet In con
vention in Omaha In about a month, and the nroh-
billtT Is that had Colonel Polk survived he would
have been nominated for President or Vice Presi
dent If the party should decide to put a ticket In
the field.
Ex-Consul Emory P. Beauchamp.
Emory P. Beauchamp died Friday at the
Central -Indiana Hospital for the Insane. Mr.
Beaucbamp was a lawyer ot Terre Haute, Ind
and was appointed United States Consul atAlx-la-Chapello
by President Grant In 1871. He passed
the most brilliant Consular examination in Wash
ington. While on leave of absence he visited
England and was Invited by Lord Chief Justice
Cockburn. who presided in the Tlchborne trial, to
a seat on the bench. He dag up the peerage record
also, and asserted his right to the extinct title of
Earl of Warwick, by which title he was afterward
known.
John Campbell, Logan's Ferry.
John Campbell, one of the oldest resi
dents of Logans' Ferry, died at his residence Fri
day afternoon. In the 71st year of his age. He
leaves a wife and seven children two girls and
five boys. He was tho father of the late W. H.
Campbell, who died In California a short time ago.
in bis younger days ho was one of the heaviest
shippers on the Allegheny Valley road. He has
been ailing for a long nine, the result of an attack
of grip.
Obltnary Notes.
Ecoene CHABAVAT, editor of ISImprtmerie, and
famous among collectors of autographs as an ex
pert, is dead In Paris. He was the son of tho pub
licist Uabrlcl Charavay, and was born at Sldl-bel-Abbes.
He was Si years or age.
Abciiimxpes Hxceuan. a well-known contrac
tor of Philadelphia, died Friday evening, aged 82
years. He was formerly half owner of the Glou
cester ferry, which was sold after the Gloucester
race course was established for ISO, wo.
t&BL& .L :5a, M&tev.'ttiiX&I!, '.jarttAfeaifiiSiiSL,- 22iiSaiiJ -t'' -ri&.' . -'.-SL&ii -"jCy-J.. ' .dtVb.totfV
BRAIN, BRAWN, BESSEMER.
Higher Education Plays Second Violin In
the Presence of Athletes Lavs of
Chickens Not Neoessarily Inclusive of
Chicken Quarrels Alone and Dumb la
Tarls.
The Bessemer Bjteel "Works at Homestead
are oontinually being inspected by visitors
to Pittsburg. People here do not know
so muoh about them as they should, for, like
Niagara Falls their worshipers come visually
from across the sea: or, as in the case of the
Alps, it takes a Tartarin from Tarascon in
France to appreciate them.
A young lady was staying with friends in
Pittsburg. She was prominent in college
circles, and herself the Greek tutor in a
women's university. Her thirst for Informa
tion led her friends to suggest a visit to
Homestead. The next morning the visitor
did not put in an appearance at breakfast, a
not unusual result of some people's untiring
hunt for the gratification of their curiosity.
"Jlmmie," said the head of the house as
she poured the coffee, addressing her re
mark to the foot of the table, "was delighted
with Bessemer, and what do you suppose
she reveled in most?"
The host mentally gauged her from the
point of view of Homer and Herodotus,
and thinking Greek young ladies more easy
of comprehension than Greek writers re
sponded. "I should guess Jimmie wonld
love to watch the huge crane with Its won
derlul.almcst human, flnzers reaching out to
clutch the hot billets. Didn't she go wild
over the trip hammer?"
Or was it not the converter as it emptied
nut the molten steel into the ingot molds
and sent up its millions of sparks?
"My dear, you are all wiong," was the
triumphant rejoinder that floated down the
table in company with the aroma lrom the
fast approaching cup of coffee, "Jlmmie
may have seen all these things, for her sight
isnotanimpa'red, bnt let me tell on, the
only remark she made was whispered in my
ear after we left, and that was what? That
she had never seen finer specimens of men
than those workmen."
Down tonnled another man's notion of
"higher education for women, bnt though
less ureek, tins young woman was really
moro Greek to him than ever.
Telegraphed Home for His Address.
Just after everybody has viewed the
snnset from the steamer it is time for the
men to go to tho smokeroom. There they
smoke, sing songs, get unco happy and
"swap yarns." The tales or the smokeroom
always have a flavor or exaggeration about
them, as though they had been built bigger
than they ought to be, so as to be seen
through .tobacco smoke, or startling enough
to penetrate the happiness. A few of these
tales filter out among tho women. The mar
ried men tell them in their cabins, the un
married men repeat them in the moonlight.
It Is needless to say whether by moonlght
or cabin, but one talo that bears hard on a
North of England man was heard about Ave
minutes after a fellow-countryman had
given it out in the smokeroom.
A native or Cumberland, where the people
are cousins-gcrnian with the Scotcb.left his
native country a poor man and came to
America. He was prosperous, and finally
became wealthy. With money came the de
sire to be something better than he had
known. He wished to become a man of the
woild. He would like to go to Paris. Re
turning to England, he unbosomed himself
to his friends. Up among the Cumberland
lakes, these gno I people pondered upon the
best plan for their kinsman to seo France.
The curriculum of the average English
parish schools, unfortunately, did not in
clude French, anil, therefore, be required an
interpieter. A clergyman was engaged, a
Godly person, one who would introduce the
young millionaire to a pious Paris, indeed.
About two days sufficed of "pious Paris."
Then the Englishman "cut and ran" for a
few hours from his reverend cicerone and
saw a Paris here lemonade is unknown.
About midnight he lelt several friends ata
hotel, and, though not precisely intoxicated,
he was in a charmingly forgetful state. The
name of the hotel was as completely e ffaced
from his recollection as his own name was
at that moment from the recording angel's
books. Cabbies didn't, perhaps wouldn't,
know English. He shouted English at them.
They returned French to him. He stamped.
They gesticulated. Then x a prophet
In Israel rose up and suggested the police
station, and to the police station he was
taken. The force of his Scotch ancestry
lose to the emergency and he bethought to
wire to the North of England fof his ad
dress. His friends were routed out in Cum
berland, and amid many ejaculations of
pity and indignation at so ungodly a town
where the name of a man's hotel even was
taken fiom him the address was tele
graphed back. About S o'clock In the
morning the hotel was reached. The follow
ing evening "hookey" was played again
from Sundav school, but this time the Hotel
.Splen'dlde-wag written across a page of the
.Englishman's note dooic
He'd Seen a Chicken Quarrel.
The American Minister prior to the Hon.
Wm. L. Scruggs, the present scholarly and
polished plenipotentiary at the Court of
Venezuela, was much liked by the Caracans.
Mr. Scott, like all well-behaved gentlemen
of middle age, was married, and unfortu
nately Mrs. Scott was not so agreeable a dose
as the Minister. After a lovely feminine
fashion, she never merely liked, she fairly
doted. Nor was there any half way about
her dislike. They weie the blackest of hates.
Mrs. Scott doted on Sunday school and mis
sionary work, and she hated well she hated
a ho st of things. Mr. Scott bad a fashion of
slipping off fiom so much positivity now
and then. A friend persuaded him to go to
a chicken fight, and the Minister is reported
to have entered into the splritof things to tho
extent of shouting, "Bravo," and pounding
his knees. Mrs. Scott heard the newt. Of
com se. she hated chickens in any form ex
rent roast, boiled or stewed. She cot Mr.
Scott at a disndvantaze, and gave him what
is termed a "curtain lecture." about his going
to what she termed a "chicken quarrel." It
leaked out. Whether tin ough tne Minister
or his wire is not known. But poor Mr.
bcott bad to stand a de.tl of chaffing from
his Spanish friends over his visit to a
"chicken quarrel."
Thn Child Who Became a Man.
When the Hon. Henry L Gonrley was
a young man he was a schoolmaster for some
time in a Pittsburg ward school, and there
made the acquaintance of a boy who after
ward became one of the most obstreperous
members or the City Councils. This small
boy had Just been transferred from a dame
school, governed by a fine old Irish woman,
where he had learned to write his letters so
large that It was a day's Journey to go ronnd
them. The public schools were having in
troduced into them tho patent copybook,
with cloae lines and small letters. Tne little
boy worked hard for awhile ovor the small,
cramped poothooks and turus, and then im
pulsively let his energy out somewhere In
the middle of the page in one of Mrs.
Malone's large "A's."
Mr. Gourley happened by and saw it. The
small boy's head was rapped harshly by Mr.
Gourley's knuckles. The next minute he
heard something swish by his ear, land
against the blackboard and mil in bits to the
floor. Then Mr. Gourley glared at his three-foot-hlgh
assailant, and at the broken ink
bottle. But he was six lect. and "It" was
but the hair or that, and the matter was as
difficult to mend at that end as was the ink
bottle at the cither.
Mariox Crawford Gallabek.
STEAMEES ENCOUHTEB 1CEBEKG3.
A Canard Unr WblcU Arrived at New
York Yesterday Passed by Six.
Nkw York, June 1L Nearly ovory steamer
which now crosses the ocean to this port
brings reports of immense icebergs near the
steamer "lanes." The Cunnrder Gallia,
which arrived from Queenstown yesterday,
passed by six icebergs.
Tho first one was seen on June 6 in latitude
UP 11 min. north and longitude 15 22 lnln.
west, S miles north of the steamship. It
was a uouble peaked iceberg 1,030 feet loug
and fully 180 feet high. Five other icebergs
were seen between that point and latitude
12 33 min. and longitude 49.
Senator Tnrpie op the Origin or Reciprocity.
St. Louis Globe-Democrat.1
Senator Turpie, or Indiana, goes back to
1703 for the origin of the reciprocity idea and
finds it in the treaty or Methuen negotiated
at that time. He contends that all modern
legislation on the subjeot of reciprocity is
borrowed from this treaty. Which reminds
us once.more that there is nothing new un
der the sun.
President Harrison Sets a Good Example,
Boston Herald.
President Harrison's $200 contribution to
the Oil City sufferer sets a good example
to all the other candidates and to the public
generally.
This Is a Republican Year.
New York Press. 3
The people have said it, the convention
has declared it and the echoes of the moun
tains are relating it to the valleys that: This
is a Bepnblican year. '
. v
?v a."'
NEWS OF THE CONVENTION.
The
Magnificent Dispatch Service
to Be
"Repeated Trom Chicago.
It is a matter of current comment that the
news service of The Dispatch from Minne
apolis was the most brilliant and comprehen
sive ever sent from any convention to any
paper of Pittsburg. And not only that, but
the conoensus of newspaper opin
ion, both East and West, is
that few metropolitan efforts have
equaled it. The field was covered in every
detail and the proceedings were stated con
cisely and accurately. Each issue was a
pen-picture of the great gathering, and put
the reader almost within the walls of the
mammoth hall.
This magnificent effort will be repeated
for the convention at Chicago June 21. The
best newsgatherers of The Dispatch staff
will be there early and late and their re
ports will be put before the public as fast as
leased wires can get them here. The service
will be as brilliant and comprehensive as
before. No detail will be overlooked; but
not an unnecessary word will be used. The
reader will get In these columns all the
news in the best style and tn the best shape.
DUDLEY'S DYSOQBAPH CAS.
Wonderfully Delicate Set of Appliances for
Railroad Inspection.
New York Times.
The dynograph car will soon start from
the Grand Central station on Its annual
spring inspection trip over the New York
Central road. This car is the invention and
property of P. H. Dudley and it makes semi
annual trips over three or four Eastern rail
roads to ascertain and record on paper the
exact condition of the rails and roadbed.
The car, which Is 40 feet long, was built ex
pressly for Mr. Dudley, and it is tne home of
himself and wife, as well as his workshop.
It represents, in its present state of ef
ficiency, the study and development of 20
yean.
Mr. Dudley has perfected an ingenious
electrical Instrument which by a system of
little glass tubes filled with ink and taper
ing to fine pen-like points will trr.ee on pa
per, as the car moves along at any rate of
speed, everything that it is desirable to
know about the condition of the roadbed.
The paper used is about 24 inches wide, and
It passes from one roller to the other, both
the rollers moving in connection with the
wheels of the car. A strip of this paper
eight feet long is used to each mile traversed,
and the points of the little glass tubes mark
on the paper the alignment of each rail, the
degree of curvature as well as the elevation
of each curve, the speed at which the car is
moving and the condition of the sunace of
the rail. Every variation of one-sixteenth
of nn inch and over is recorded.
Connected with the registering and trac
ing instrument in the car is a contrivance
which automatically ejects a drop of bine
paint upon each Joint in the track where the
end of one rail Is one-sixteenth of an inch or
more out of gear. At the end or a trip the
exact number of such faulty spots Is found
recorded 011 a slip of paper. Trackmen are
sent out on the various sections after the car
has passed, and the loose joints marked by
the blue paint are properly adj usted.
Mr. Dudley has fitted up very comfortable
quarters in his car for his wife nnd himself,
including a well-equipped kitchen, library
and sitting room, in which Mrs. Dudley ha3
her piano. Mr. Dudley is an Ohio man, but
is well known here and elsewhere as a
scientific stndent. He is a member of the
Academy of Sciences and is Vice President
of the American Mlorosconical Society. His
dynograph car is of much service to the
railroads on whioh he oporates it.
THE MINNEAPOLIS PLATFORM.
It appeals to the mannood, the self re
spect, the clear thoughtfulness ot the party
and of the country. Detroit Journal (Rev.).
Tbe platform is as a whole a very accepta
ble and clear statement of the issues of to
day from a Republican point of view Syra
cuse Herald llnd.).
Os the whole, it is a mo3t miscellaneous
and non-explosive platform, Intended rather
fora defensive tban an aggressive campaign.
New York Times (D-m.).
Altooetoxb there Is a little straddling,
some glittering generalities and much bold
affirmance in explicit terms of party princi-,
pies and policy. Washington Btarllnd.-Dem.').
The Platform Committee might have sat
for a month and could not have covered the
money question in shrewder shape. Phila
delphia Telegraph (.Rep.).
The committee Is to bo congratulated on
its wisdom in clinging to principles and
leaving to the proper bodies the means of
carrying them into effect. Columbus 10.)
Dispatch (Rep.).
Republicans may take comfort from their
new creed. It rehashes the old pretenses
and cunningly straddles where the people
bad right to expect honest statement. Chi
cago Tim's (Rep.).
Ix bringing forward the bloody shirt as a
political issue the platform makers betray
their desperation. The lorce. bill Is as dead
as the pragmatic sanction, and no hot blast
of vituperation can revive controversy over
it. Philadelphia Record (Dem.).
While a ringing assertion of the national
spirit, it gives much attention, as befits the
period, to tho material progress of tho coun
try and to the responsibilities attending the
rapid Increase- in national power and pros
perity. Cincinnati Times-Star (Rep.).
The Democratic press will find no rotten
planks, no breaches, in the Republican
walls. The platrorm in its entirety is strong,
able and reflects credit upon its Builders and
upon the National Convention. Toledo (O.)
Blade (Rep.).
The Republican national platform re
ported by the Committee on Resolutions Is
worthy or the magnificent record of the
party. There is not a backward step, not an
evasive utterance on the great issues before
the people, but on each a frank and manly
declaration of purposes. New York Tribune
(Rep.).
Takis In its entirely the platform Is a
strong nnd manly document. There are a
few recommendations in it, such as tbe
plank on tbe World's Fair and Nicaragua
Canal, which scarcely deserve a place in a
declaration of party principles, but they
are unimportant. Philadelphia Bulletin
.(Sep-).
d TELL ME, IS IT LOVET
i
From Atlanta Constitution.
I'm feeling very strange of late;
All Is not right I fear.
My mind's approaching such a state
'Twere mild to call It queer.
It first began with writing verse.
And seeking rhymes for "dove:"
But sow It's dally growing worse
O tell me, is it lover
I spend a fortune In perfumes;
My candy bill's Immense.
Ibny tho rarest kind of blooms
Beganlless of expense.
I pose before the glass and smile
In every sortofway:
I turn and bow In every style
Now, is It love? O say?
To woman's charms so long quite proof.
Smiles, blushes, dimples, all.
From each bright snare I held aloof.
And viewed my comrades fall.
Who would bavo dreamed that ever I
Would keep a female glove.
And blush and kiss It on the sly
O tell me, Is it love?
I do not eat enough to keep
A humming bird alive.
They say I babble in my sleep
Such honeyed thoughts 1 hive.
I know I stammer when I speak;
My hands are In my way.
A certain doorstep makes me weak
Now, Is It love? Osay!
I nsed to laugh at stars and moons
As only fltfor "chaff,"
Now I go humming old love tunes
And hardly ever laugh.
I seek by night a vine-wreathed house.
And watch a light above.
Then sneak away Just like a mouse
O tell me. Is It love?
Within my brain queer fancies come.
And problems strange and new;
If one Uvea on a certain sum.
How much will serve for two?
And then anon I'm darkly sad.
And then I'm wildly gay.
1 O tell me. ami growing mad?
Or I It love? Usayt
Bamuxi. Mnrruns pick.
CURIOUS CONDENSATIONS.
Paris has 6,100 policemen.
New York City has 167 millionaires.
There are over 3,000 women printers in
the United States.
Envelopes, It Is said, were first made in
the fifteenth century.
Over fi.OOO murderers are believed to be
at large In Great Britain.
The Governmental Pavings Bank is
Paris has 625,000 depositors.
Thirty years ago Methodism In London
had only 26 chapels. Now there are 1U.
A Chattanooga, Tenn., Judge recently
disposed of 111 divorce cases In ISO minutes-
There have been 27 cases of insanity 14
the Bavarian royal family during the last
100 years.
The total value of matches made annu
ally throughout the world represents a value
Of185,000,000.
There is to be a model Malay village at
the Chicazo Fair, arranged by order of the
uuii.uu ui uuuore.
The people of the United States read
and support as many newspapers a3 Eng
land, France and Germany combined.
One of the novelties of the Chicago
Exhibition will be a dentistry department,
in which patient3 will be operated on la
public. More people were executed In England
during the reign of King Henry VIII than
ever before or since In the tight little island,
the numuer reaching 71.400.
The colossal statue of Mercury made for
the city of Avernl, in Gaul, by Zenodoms,
who was engaged ten years on this great
work, cost the city $1,775,000.
Members of Parliament are paid In
every country except England, the United
States paying the hi-ihesc salary of any
nation in the world $3,000 annually.
In Rochester, K. T., an electric circuit
to run sewing machines extends to the out
skirts of tbe city. Hundreds of people in
this way work for large clothing firms.
The latest whim for the owners of dogs
is to make them wear shoes in the house
for tho pnrpose or protecting the polished
floors. They are made of chamois, with
leather soles.
A Hew Yorker has made a clock from
84,000 pieces of wood, comprising over 300
varieties. For 18 years he has had sailors
bringing him rare woods from every quarter
of the globe.
A young lady of TJncasville, Conn., was
accidentally struck by a stray bullet on
Tuesday, near the heart, and had it not been
for a corset steel, which the bullet hit, she
wonld have been killed.
A chimney 350 feet high is being built
for the Omaha and Grant Smelting Works,
In Denver, Col. It will be an octagon stack,
65 feet In diameter at tbe base, placed on a
concrete foundation IS feet deep, imbedding
20 feet of steel rails.
Nearly all the royal personages of
Europe are cousins, and not very far re
moved, as it has been laid down by a Ger
man geneologist that every crowned head of
Europe, bar Turkey, Is descended from one
or two sisters, who lived about 150 years ago.
Eastern physicians have decided that
the small toe of the human foot is a hin
drance to locomotion and that it should bo
remoyed. In some cases reported all bnt
the great toe have been cnt off for the rea
son that the latter is the only one of any use
in walking.
In Maine a physician made gestures
when giving a nurse directions for a patient,
and his horse, noticlug them from the street,
made straight for the window, thinking
himselr called to share In tbe consultation.
He broke several panes of glass before he
could be controlled.
NineofTJncle Sam's mail carriers in
the East sent a prospector, a friend of theirs,
to Creede, CoL, and from time to time sup
plied him with money. The total amount
which they contributed was $500, and the
other day they sold a claim which thelrpros
pector located for $25,000.
There has been recently a nniqne ladies'
strike In Germany In one of the garrison
towns. The conduct ot tbe men, who neg
lected the unmarried ladles in order to
dance with the wives of their friends and
acquaintances, displeased the slighted,
maidens and their mothers, and at the last
regimental baU not an unmarried girl was
present:
A remarkable fact can be discovered
with the aid of a pencil. In the twentieth
generation preceding the present, each per
son now allvo had 1,000 000 of ancestors. The
exact figures are 1,043,578. Every person had
two parents, four grandparents, eight great
grandparents, etc. Keep on doubling until
the twentieth generation, and you will
verify the immense aggregate given above.
A woman of South Norridgewock, Me.,
carries on a farm, keep3 a horse and cow,
makes butter for market and sells eggs, be
sides doing her housework and caring for
five little children. After her household
duties are completed in the morning, she
puts up tbe dinners for tne children, har
nesses her horse, taking two of her children,
and drives to Martin Stream, where she has
a school of 17 children.
Hosts ot unemployed men and of others
seeking temporarily to better their condi
tion are flocking to the Delaware peninsula
now to pick small fruits for the markets of
Philadelphia and New York. The fruit
srowers erect rude sheds in the open fields.
and here the berry pickers eat and Mean
while the season lasts. The earnings o'f
berry pickers are considerably above the
average pay of farm hands.
Abont four years ago a workman at
Beaver Falls, noticing a toad about the size
of a walnut, placed it in a little pile of sand,
and, laying a large stone on it, never gave It
another thought. A year after this particu
lar stone began to show signs or decay, and
Anally cracked clean across. The crack be
gan to widen, until a few day ago an aper
ture was made and out jumped a live toad.
It was found to be of monster size.
The Ealklands produce no trees, bnt
they do produce wood In a very remarkable
shape. You will see, scattered here and
there, singular blocks of what look like
weather-beaten, mossy, gray stones, of vari
ous size. But if you attempt to roll over
one of these rounded boulders, you will And
yourself unable to accomplish it. In (act.
the stone is tied down to tho ground tied
down by the roots; or in other words, it is
not a stone, but a block of living wood.
In a graveyard at "White Pine, CaL,
there have been found recently petrified
human bodies in many kinds of dress, min
ers, desperadoes with their pistols and
knives buckled round their waists, and per
sons of all degrees. White Pine 25 years ago
was one of the phenomenal cities of tne
West,many hundred buildings being erected,
but to-day only a few remain standing, most
oftbem having fallen and decayed. It Is
owing to the lime water in that section that
the bodies have turned to stone.
JUNE SNAPSHOTS.
Mr. "Wickwire "What seemed to be th
trouble next door last night?
Mrs. Wlckwlre-Ob. It was Just a question as to
who had the floor. He wanted to tell her of tho
fish he bad caught, wnile she wanted to tell him or
the smart things the baby had done while he was
gone. Indianapolis Journal.
Clara Mr. Spudkins wants me to make
case for his umbrella, and I don't know what ma
terial to use.
Maude-Why don't you use one of your silk
stockings? Cloak Beciea.
A pair in a hammock
Attempted to kiss..
And In less than a jiffy
siqj 31.11 papui iaqi
Jf. Y. Evening Sum,
"Ton are In love?"
"Great Scott, not I'm married. "Chicago-Suet'
Record.
Kingley "What makes yon so lame, old
fellow? Youhaven't the gout, have you?
Bingo (groaning) Oh, no. But my wire Insists
on darning my socks for me. -V. F. herald.
She couldn't ride a bicycle,
She conldn't Greek translate.
Sue couldn't swim, she couldn't row.
She couldn't even skate.
She couldn't cook, she couldn't bake.
She couldn't shuffle a deck
Of cards: but one thing she could de
She could Indorse a check.
BrooWyn Eagle.
Mrs. Gazzam (reading) Orpheus struck
the lyre.
y aizam That was the proper treatment Detroit
tree Press.
Tom There Is one mighty agreeable
tiling about calllntr on an old maid.
Jack What Is that?
Tom-Sne doesn't bore you to death by ting
abont "old times, "-X, T.BcraU,
. v ''Jkaikblr- w,i-
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