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16
THE PTTTSBTIRGr DISPATCH, SUNDAY, DECEMBER S7, 189L
y
.-REWEW-OF SPORTS,
Pleasing Features of the Settlement
of the Harvard-Princeton
Troubles.
A LSTTEE FEOM QUEENSBERRY.
He Hsb a Few Interesting "Words to Bay
About the Ice and Abuse of
His roring Kales.
BATTLE BETWEEN CAEF.OIL A5D KIEL
Ceneral BimIiII iffiiin and a Few Eemarta ilxmt
the Ilome Club.
One of the most pleasing things among
sporting events during the past week, and
I venture to say one of the most important
la more ways than one, has been the settle
ment of the differences between the Har
vard and Princeton athletes, or at least
those who represent the athletes. "We all
know the chasm there has been between
Harvard and Princeton for a long time and
low that breach has been an embargo on
emateur athletics to a very great extent
tTbe estrangement in question simply left in
coubt more or less ot the end of the season
'the comparative merits of onr three leading
nmatcur centers. Regarding the causes of
the trouble I have not one word to say, nor
do I feel inclined to express an opinion as
to whether or not Harvard was in the right
or that Princeton was in the wrong. Suf
fice it to say that both parties a few days
r.go met and displayed a give and take
tpirit that soon brought about a settlement
end all of the ".New England resolution"
was soon sent to oblivion.
Now this settlement is of the highest im
portance to the amateurism of the United
Btates because the harmony resulting will
Impart a new impetus into amateur ath
letics ia the three leading universities.
Their example cannot but' have the very
best of effects, particularly because wc ex
pect to have a three cornered contest in al
most every branch of sport known at the
tiriversities. Of course the majority of
people seem to think that Yale is the
"Boss" in almost everything, but there are
very conflicting opinions as to which is the
superior between Harvard and Princeton.
In many respects the question is a difficult
one to decide, and I dare say that it will
require actual contests between them be
fore anything like a true comparison can
be made.
Queensberry's Letter.
Headers of these reviews will know that
for years I have been a fault-finder with the
so-called JIarquis of Queensberry rules. It
Is sot at all necessary to recite my objec
tions to them again, but I want to draw at
tention to the fact that the Marquis of
Queensberry himself has eomr to the front
end discarded the code of rules now known
ns the QuetnOierry rules. A few days ago
lie had the following letter put beiore the
public in reply to criticisms similar to
those that haieappeared in this paper from
time to time:
"3Iay I be. allowed to say one word, as
certainly the lather of these rules and as
fart originator also of them, for they were
drawn up by Mr. John Chambers under my
supervision and ratification to be applied to
judsing the contests for the Queensberry
challenge cups given by myself, and were 1
belicic, the lirst of the kind which attract
ed public attention to amateur boxing. .As
to the sentence quoted above, the rules may
be merciless as rcgardc glove contests or
lights with gloves, but they certainly never
were framed for such purposes, nor to give
satisfaction to the authorities at Scotland
Yard, who never dreamt in those days of
interfering with the Queensberry boxing
contests, where scientific sparring was con
sidered the chief quality,and round-arm slog
ping and knocking-out rather went against
a man than in his favor. No doubt better
rules could be made for the glove fights and
contests of the present day, which I main
tain are entirely a different thing to ama
teur boxing, where the points to be consid
ered are as to who is the most scientific
sparrer, not who can knock the other chap
out It is not the fault of the rules, but of
the people who try to adapt them for what
they were never intended lor. As for their
being miscalled, it is ically a matter of
small importance; but if they are not
Queensberry rules, this query, Whose are
tbey? I should like to know. I not only
helped to draw them up, nut, naturally,
they were named after the cups I gave, and
for whicn they were framed."
Ills Leading Fault.
ITovr I trust that the fault-finding, even
by Queensberry himself, will have good re
" suits. I know of nobody in this country
who has definitely criticized these rules,
&nd, if there is something done to amend
them, it is to be hoped that everybody will
not rush to the frout and exclaim that they
had "known all along they nere wrong."
The noble gentleman draws attention to
the great fault of the rules when he says
that their shortcomings lie more in the fact
of people adapting them to what they were
never meant for than in the rules them
teives. This is what I have argued for
nearly four years, and this is the feature
that make them the most brutal rules that
anybody can light under. Queensberry never
did intend his rules for brutal prize fighting
and his letter leaves no doubt on this point.
The truth is he conceived the rules as
something entirely distinct from London
jri?e ring rules. The latter 3re for fighting
and for fichting only; Queensberry's rules
were for boxing and boxing only; that they
have been twisted into a so-called code of
boxing rules under which almost all the
ignoble and brutal contests of recent times
have taken place, is no fault of Queens
berry's. The time undoubtedly has come when some
thing like rational rules should regulate the
big olic contests of to-day. A change is
needed and if there is not one the battle
may be stopped entirely. It is nothing
short of outrageous to have a contest such
as that between Carroll and Uyers guided
by our Queensberry rules.
Another Feature of It.
"While I have been doing my fault finding
about these rules, Mr. Co"bbet, on the
London Referee, has also been doing his, and
here is what he says about the letter of
the Marquis:
"Thefact is we have here a reversal of the
wise child knowing its oan father; the
vise father does not know his own (puta
tive) child. Iiike the police and the pub
lic, lie nas ior so many years passed as
Queensberry v-Jiat is not a genuine article
that he mixes the right rules uiththe
spurious imitation. I said the conventional
regulations were arranged lor Scotland Yard
and endurance. Now I vill give chapter
and verse to defend my assertion. Years
ago Jem Goode, son of the oldest of old
'uns, and Jlickey Ilccs, who lacked but one
essential to be a v, orth3 representative of
Jlendoza's race, made a match to box with
gloves. Just about the time, too, a jovial
cabdriver of Lincoln fancied himself a
boxer, and flew at high game. He took on
Tom Allen, the Midland pugilist contcm
poraiy and opponent of Joe Goss, etc.
Allen was in England, after a so
journ in the States, where in vari
ous ways he had been getting
a living. Tom jumped at the opportunity
end a match was made to box with ordinary
gloves. For both engagements real fine and
large pillow cases these were, too about
three times as large and heavy as the sort
noble witnesses swore, apropos Slavin-Mc-AnlifTc,
in the witness-box were the proper
kind for match sparring. As a matter of
detail they were extra big and well padded,
because Scotland Yard was held in great
fear. Before the duels the mittens were
presented for inspection at "Whitehall and
all manner of genuine assurances given that
they would be used by the principals, also
that they were of thepattern approved and
boxed with at the Marquis of Queensberry's
amateur championships. His lordship's
name was played for all it was worth, so
was the amateur racket. For why?
"A gate at Sadler's "Wells was "most de
sirable, and the great thing was to satisfy
the police that what they permitted among
amateurs at Brompton could not fairly be
subject for interference in Clerkeuwell
. simply because pro's were performers in
stead of the other kind of Eparrers. To
that end the agreements for the matches
were carefully drawn up as under Queens
berry rules 'for endurance.' Those two
little words, which meant that ag indefinite
number of rounds would be boxed instead
of the prescribed three, with perhaps an
extra one, made all the difference in the
world, as I trust you now see, my lord.
Tor endurance' meant that, instead ot
points determining which was victor, a
Eingle point would count, and that settled
by one of the combatants, who must give in
or be disabled, and these Queensberry were
not Q. rules at nlL Am I wrong in ranking
them in their miscalled application?"
rarlfjlnc; tho Turr.
Everybody who takes any interest at all
in turf "matters must hail with delight the
efforts to kill the most thievish system of
winter horse racing that has been in vogue
in this country for many years. Just as
sure as a burglar secures his "jimmy'to
rob houses certain parties have for years
kept winter racing going as a means of
robbing the public. It may be true that
the public is old enough to know its own
business and that no law compels the public
to patronize racing of any kind. But we
have to take human nature as it is, and
the fact is that a very large portion of the
public have a strong desire to patronize and
invest on horse racing.
The investments are made with the un
derstanding that everything is honest, but
it is just here where "the 'fraudulent work
comes in. There is scarcely anything
honest about the races at all as the events,
the disgraceful events at Garfield,
Gloucester and Guttenburg have proven.
It is this dishonesty then that should be
stopped, this deluding system which per
suades people that they are getting an
honest spin for their money when nothiug
but deliberate robbery is intended. It is to
be hoped that the good work ot closing up
the parks of robbery will go on.
Makin? Things Lively.
Since the arrival of Slavin and Mitchell in
this country matters have certainly been
extremely lively among the pugilists. So
far little "of importance has been done ex
cept the arranging for a six-round contest
between Mitchell and Corbett, and a boxing
contest of four rounds between Dempsey
and Peter Maher. My readers must excuse
mc if I sav that I take little stock in either
contest. Both arc for moncv, and money
only,, and if Mitchell and Corbett hadn't
made an engagement we would probably
not have beard of that between Dempsey
and Maher.
But will anybody tell me what a six
round glove contest between Charles
Mitchell and James J. Corbett will amount
to outside of their getting quite a pile of
greenbacks? As far as I am able to judge,
and I'm onlv speakinz for myself, the con
test will amount to very little as far as
proving who is the better fighter. Mitchell,
it is true, does not want to light any more,
and Corbett wants to face nothing but a big,
soft clove Two desires of these kind can
soon'fix matters up. Of course, if every
thing is on its merits Corbett should have
considerably the best of the contest, be
cause of his build, and also because of the
Eastern way of judging points. In the
Dempsey-McCafirey affair, a light touch
counted for as much as a "jaw-breaker."
This is nonsense. But Mitchell knows his
business better than anybody else, and this
being so, depend upon it, he will take none
the worst of the bargain.
History Repenting Itsnlf.
And now let us jnst for a moment ask our
selves what those Madison square contests
mean. It is not difficult to see that they
mean just what similar contests a few years
ago meant; fooling the public to a great ex
tent. "We can all remember a few years ago
when thousands and thousands of" dollars
ere made by these boxing contests of four
and six rounds. The country at that time
was full of fakirs and there were really very
few real fighters. Two fakirs could get up
before the public and gather in more money
on an evening than a good business man
earns in a year.
An efl-t is being made to re-establish
this swi Ailing order of things, because if
Mitchell and Corbett can bring off their
contest and also Dempsey and Maher, de
pend upon it the old lbnr-round receipt
business will get into full swing again. It
is not intended here to mean that any of the
four boxers or pugilists above named are
fakirs. They may or they may not be, but
hat I mean is that their contests are the re
commencing of a system that was a very bad
one a few years ago, inasmuch as it made
more so-called pugilists in 12 months than
were developed in the ten years previous.
Certainly, boxing contests have their good
featureswhen the principals are first class
or anything like it, but the adventurers and
the impostors are those who kill public
boxing.
3rycrs Latest Victory.
Doubtless the vast majority of patrons of
boxing and pugilism throughout the coun
try were surprised at the result of the battle
between Jimmy Carroll and Billy Myer.
Most assuredly I was; that i, I did not ex
pect that Myer would be hailed the victor.
But last Sundav it was pointed out in this
paper that if the battlo was a long one
Myer would win it pimply because age was
against Carroll. I further stated that there
was only one way for Myer to win, and that
was to prolong the contest until Carroll was
wearied. 3Iyer did this and won. But I
had expected that Carroll would have forced
matters in a way that would have ended the
fight in ?0 or 25 rounds. He tried to do this
and failed, and his failure in this respect
was entirely due to the size of the gloves.
The contest was a good one lrom start -to
finish and Myer showed up with improved
judgment and in probably better form than
he has ever been seen before. For nearly
two hours he acted on the defensive and in
a manner that could not be other than
effective. In retreating from Carroll he was
always on the look out for Carroll's
rashes and when the latter did rush Myer
countered almost every time. This really
beat Carroll as Myer's left hand so often
found a stopping (place on Carroll's body or
face that he was weakened considerably by
blows as well rs by running around.
Certainly for a long time Carroll displayed
the better fighting, and had skin gloves been
used Myer would have been blinded m a
comparatively short time. But five-ounce
gloves are not the weapons for a man 40
years old to contcstagainst a youngster with
particularly under Queensbiiry rules. To
make a long story short Carroll's blows
were not effective enough to knock Myer
out before age began to tell on Carroll
himself.
Of course, it was more of a welter-weight
contest than anvthicg else, so that we can
not estimate the contestants as fighting in
the lightweight class. The weight, 138 or
139, is just the weight that will suit Jack
McAnlifTe now, and we may expect a battlo
between the latter and Myer. It seems to
mc certain that had McAuliffe been in front
of Myer's Tuesday night, and in his best
form at 139 pounds the Streater man would
have been defeated in comparatively short
time. McAulifie is a much betterleader
oft than any of he men of his class and he
u ould have hit Myer very often without
getting auything in return. "
Myer's victory somewhat mixes things up,
as be was defeated bv Bowcn and the latter
was beaten by Carroll. This makes it clear
that age is beginning to tell on Carroll and
it is likely that he will soon retire.
ragHUtlc matters In General.
During this week there are two contests
that will attract considerable attention.
One is between Bowen and Austin Gibbons,
and the other between Joe McAulifie and
Patsy Cardiff. Both 'contests will Hake
place Tuesday night, and the former will
doubtless be the most interesting to -Eastern
sporting people I am still inclined to
think that Gibbons will defeat Bowcn,
although defeat lias already entered the
Gibbons camp by Carroll being heated. If
Gibbons is victorious then we are sure to
have a contest between bim and Myer, and
if that takes place matters will be entirely
different. In this instance Gibbons has
very great advantage over Bowen in height
and reach and this, I think, will enable Him
to win.
It is so long since Joe McAuliffe ap
peared in public that it is difficult to form
an opinion as to what class he is now in.
"When at his best he was far from first-class,
but in my opinion he was the superior of
Patsy Cardiff. The latter probably would
never have been heard tell of at all if the
"four-rounds-with-gloves" mama had not
been introduced. "Were McAuliffe any
thing like what he was a fcr years ago he
would certainly defeat Cardiff. But we
don't know what condition he is in. Jack
son has beaten both men, hut we must not
lorget that Jackson was a much better man
when he fought McAuliffe than when he
met Cardiff. 'Neither Cardiff nor McAuliffe
arc stayers and neither are very game, but
if we are assured that McAuliffe is in any
thing like good condition I think he will
win.
There is still little probability of a con
test between Sullivan and Slavin, and it is
quite apparent that the friends of the
former are not so enthusiastic about the
chances of downing the Australian as they
were, or at least as they said they were. It
is not likely that the men will'ever fight,
and lii 4?1. .!lt -.a !. Cl.itin'.
Aboat Baseball Affair.
To-day baseball is placed at the bottom of
the list simply because there is scarcely any
interest in it at present, and also because
there is so little that is now connected with
it Magnates are gradually getting settled
down to the 12-club league scheme, and all
kinds of things are being predicted regard
ing it. One authority has ventured the
opinion that there will not be 12 clubs in
the League at the close of the season, and
a large number of authorities are now fully
coavinceu iii.ic me I--C1UD arrangement
won't last more than a season. I am free to
admit that there is much truth in the latter
prediction, and in my humble judgment
when 1893 comes we'll "find the League and
Association as usual. True, there may be
what is called a central league formed, but
it will be only a moderate affair.
But there is one thing about the new
League that we must all feel satisfied with,
viz., the excellent quality of the 12 teams
thatare likely to play in the League. De
pend upon it there will be some great ball
playing next season, and as far as indica
tions go what heretofore have been pro
verbially weak teams will be remarkably
strong. Take Washington for instance.
"Pop" Young is taking good care that the
"Senators" are not being left- and
he is doing right. All of us who
take an interest in the national game
are sure to be pleased if Washington is
blessed with a good team. I tKink it will
be so. Von der Ahe is not in the business .
for fun and he'll be on deck in good form.
Zach Phelps is half "of the committee who
distributes' the players, and Louisville will
be looked after. Altogether there will be
12 excellent teams and that will be a great
feature.
The Local Clnb.
After all, we ore going to be in line with
the best of them, as far as getting an attrac
tive team together is concerned. AVe have
now a team, taking records into considera
tion, who are far above the average, and
while they may on paper be less showy than
onr lot of last spring, they give promise of
being the best team we have ever had in
Pittsburg. "Without something very extra
ordinary happens to ruin it, we have one of
the best inhelds in the country, both in
fielding and batting. The outfield is more
than an average one, and our catchers
are as good as we want. There is perhapi
something problematical about tho
pitchers, but nobody can say that wo
are weak in pitching. "With Bald
win, Ehret and Galvin in form, we have a
remarkably strong trio and Woodcock can
be speculated on. He may be an effective
and meritorious man. We don'tknow. If
he is a good man we are all right. Cer
tainly with the pitchers we have at present
it would seem unnecessary for the local
clnb to go to more expense in running after
more pitchers except in a case where a
really first-class man is at stake
Well, I am glad and we all arc glad that
things are looking oo bright as they are.
The directors nre, indeed, working like
beavers to give us a victorious team, and
nobodv is more enthusiastic in the matter
than Treasurer Temple. The new President
is a worker and a gentleman who won't
allow a few dollars to stand between him
and a good thing. PEISGLE.
OPEBATIKG OK A TIOEB.
The Cnrator of the Dublin Zoological Society
Has a Narrow Escape.
Youths' Companion. l
Dr. Haughton, the curator of the Dublin
Zoological Society, discovered that one of
the tigers was lame. Upon examining its
paws through the bars of the cage he found
that a claw was growing inwards into the
ball of the foot, causing the poor brute
great agony whenever it tried to walk. The
doctor determined to cut out the claw.
Five keepers assisted him, three in front
of the cage and two behind. The tiger was
lassoed, and, much against his will, tied
down, the five keepers firmly holding the
rope. The doctor then raised the bars, en
tered the cage, and began operating.
Bat he had forgotten to guard himself
against the tigress in the cage adjoining.
She managed to reach him with one paw
and knocked off his hat. The keepers, see
ing this, took fright, let go the rope and
fled, leaving the doctor at .the mercy of his
patient. The tiger jumped up and prepared
to spring, but the doctor jumped through
the "raised bars and pulled them down.
Against them the tiger dashed, gnashing
and foaming with fury.
The doctor called the keepers together
and reprimanded them for their cowardice;
then he locked the doors, put the keys in
his pocket, and said:
"I intend to perform this operation what
ever happens. You will fix the lasso again,
and if you let go the rope this time, lean
escapcand you will be left with the tiger."
The men behaved bravely, the trouble
some claw was successively removed, and
was afterward worn by the doctor as a scarf
pin. Prom that time, whenever the the tiger
heard its friend's footstep it would throw
itself on its back, purr, roll about to attract
his attention, and would never be satisfied
till he approached and recognized it
Floorrd.
Dyspepsia Is speedily floored by Hostet.
tor's btoniacli Bitters, purest, plcasantest of
fctoinacliics, most effective of tonics. Heart
burn, flatulence, the "sinkins" sensation in
the pit of the &touiach experienced by dys
peptics, in brief, all symptoms and tuoyare
many and perplexing of indljcestlo.i aie
banished by the Bitters, w liicli Is particu
laily eftiencious for biliousness, malaria,
lhcumatism and kidney complaints.
The Bft Thlnff for a Stubborn Cough.
From the Kimball (S. D.) c!r.iplilc.J
While the columns of the Graphic are
open to any and all unobjectionable adver
tisements, yet it is quite impossible for us
to speak knowingly of the merits of the
various articles of merchandise advertised.
Particularly is this true of patent medi
cines. But there are exceptions occasion
ally, and a noteworthy exception is the
celebrated Chamberlain's Cough Itcmedy.
This now universally known medicine has
been advertised in the Graphic for four or
five years, but not until recently had we
any personal knowledge of its wonderful
efficacy, which has come about through the
prevailing influenza and the stubborn cough
that has so often attended it In the writer's
family this medicine has on several occa
sions this winter cured a cough that baffled
any and all other remedies; and the num
ber of families ip Kimball and vicinity in
which this remedy has been used with like
effects attests to its value as a specifio for
coughs and'coldt of every nature. xxaa
NEW TEAR ADYICE.
Bob Burdette Suggests Some Resolu
tions for This Time of Tear.
NO USE TRYING TO BE TOO GOOD.
The
Establishment of Kules Proves
Proneness to Do EyiL
BEING GOOD ENOUGH
TO OXE'S SELF
nreirrct fob tub dispatch.1
It probably occurred to you, my boy,
some time this morning that this would be
a fitting time to introduce a series of good
resolutions in your system of government.
While I am not a very pronounced Mug
wump which indeed is an impossible thing
I am thoroughly convinced that every
day in the year is a good time to reform
things. And, also, that about everything
on this old planet needs reformation about
three times a day, and even then it won't
stay reformed half the time, ton minutes
after the headache has passed away.
Man, by which term I mean everything
that breathes and is capable of meanness, is
sometimes at his best when he is unable to
do anything, good or bad. "It was good for
me to be afflicted," remarked the Psalmist.
He was correct; and had we been his spir
itual adviser "we?" Yes, I or you, or
any other man living he would have been
afflicted a great deal more than he was.
Nothing makej us so piously mad as to see
people imitate our faults. A man has less
charity and tenderness for his own besetting
sin in other people, than a cat has for a rat,
or a dog for the cat.
The Benefit of Physical Affliction.
One of the mixed benefits of physical
affliction or disability, is that while it may
incapacitate a man from doing a great deal
of good, it keeps him, in a measure, from
committing any vast amount of deviltry.
Doesn't make him any better, necessarily,
any more than it makes a man. better to
hang him or send him to jail. Even the
wolf restrained his evil passions and didn't
bite or steal so long as he had the bone in
his throat. But he was a wolf Just the
same, and it he had died in that spasm of
harmlessuess and gentleness he would have
died a wolf.
So, my boy, I hope that you will not
enter upon a career of invalidism to help
you through the coming year. I hope you
will enjoy robust health and an appetite
that will make glad the heart of the
butcher and baker.
Therefore, "whereas, an' seein' an' where
fore," this is the time of year when men are
accustomed to change their linen and put on
clean things; and whereas, to be in the
swim one must take at least one annual
bath in a tub brim full of penitential tears
!nd come out of its purifying waters sweet
as a baby just a little too good, tor hve or
ten minutes, for anything; and whereas, if
wc start in on '92 where we stand at the
close of '91 we are in the ruck already and
handicapped beyond all hope of taking any
place; therefore, in secret session, with the
doors locked and nobody in the room but
ourselves, be it
Do Not Try to Be Too Rood.
EisoLvro, That this year I will not be any
better than I ought to be.
Specification: Because, my boy, If you
begin by fasting twice in the week, when
once a year is required of you, and by giv
ing tithes of all yon possess, when no such
offering is demanded, you will strike a gait
ou the first quarter that (will simply shut
you out at the distance pole.
You oomprawney too, don't you? I
thought you'd say that. I liked the spirit
of your New Year resolutions last year. I
like the spirit that moves a man to squat
down, set his teeth, pull all his muscles to
gether, and with one mighty effort to try to
jump clear across the slough of despond
and over the hill of difficulty and across
the valley of humiliation, right over the
top of the pearly gates and plumb into
heaven at one mighty bound. It's a great
act, when it is well done. But so many
men eood moral athletes, too who have
tried ft have missed their tip and come
right down into the slough, not 11 feet
And You Don't Go Alone, Tbo.
from the scratch, with such a dull, splashy
thud and such awful choklngs and wallow
ing!) that I confess it mrikes my heart stand
still now whenever I see a young fellow or
an old man getting ready for the jump. It
is a disconraging tumble to the athlete, and
it makes the spectators hysterical.
Then people get into the habit of saying
that it can't be done, aud the man himself
says there's no use trying, and he is apt to
give up and wander back to the City of De
struction, put up the sign which "he had
thrown into the back yard, take down the
shutters, open the shop and resume busi
ness at the same old stand, with a big
branch house on the installment plan at
Vanity Fair. But this year let's not make
more than a day's journey at a time and
not travel over to exceed seven days in the
week. That's the best way to get to
Heaven.
Resolved, That I will try to bo as good as I
ought to be.
Specification: And if you succeed in doing
this, my son, it will leave you precious
little time ior anything else. There are
heaps of mean things you had lotted on doing
this year that will be entirely stricken from
the docket by this resolution.
"You hadn't planned any meanness?"
Oh yes, you had. There are two or three
fellows yon were scheming "to get even
with," and any sort of revenge, my boy, is
mean as "Injun." Beprisal belongs to
privateering,. and in this age privateering
shaves piracy so closely that it isn't respect
able. And what isn't respectable in a Gov
ernment is fairlr damnable in an individual.
And you had plan, whereby tout pbu I
Given Boy a Delicate Tine.
Lrfrr or U gyp
might be made a little easier by shifting
gome of your work off on somebody else.
Will Keep Ton Hosy all Tear.
Whereas, The only way to make your
work easier is to work a little harder.
Some of the recreations you had laid out
but without any intention of burying them
had just a leetle smear of pitch on them.
True, you have made up your mind to clean
house pretty thoroughly this January, bnt
there was just a little lump of leaven you
were going to leave in a corner here and
there; a questionable form of fun and spice
that you arn't quite ready to give up;
Now, my boy, if you are going to be as
good as you ought to be, all these things
will have to go. Don't be the least bit
afraid that such a radical reformation will
make you any better than you ought to be,
aud so lead you into transgressing your first
resolution. I will give bond in a fabulous
sum that there isn't a particle of danger.
Still, if you think there is, you might order
your wings this week, in order to be ready
for the transformation. Heap of grip In
the country yet!
Tho Sin of Selfishness.
Resolved, That I will be good to myself.
Specification: That is an excellent reso
lution, son. I don't know but it should
have the first place on the list. You
Dor.'t Try to Be Too Good.
haven't been exactly fair to yourself since
I have known you. Nobody else treats
you quite as meanly as you do. And I
don't think you are "quite so mean to any
one else as you are to yourself. You
thought you were too good to yourself; one
of the things you had privately resolved to
overcome was your, growing selfishness?
Well, that's right that comes under this
resolution; vour selfishness hurts yourself
more than it does anyone else.
A close-fisted, narrow-hearted man and
you're anything but that, son doesn't
dwarf humanity; he doesn't make the world
mean; he just .shrivels himself until his
stingy little soul rattles about in his dried
carcass like a wrinkled pepper grain in an
old shoe. All the wrong, all the evil, all
the sin you do in this world, hurts yourself
worse than it hurts anyone else. The
treachery of Judas only resulted in the sui
cide of Judas; didn't kill the Church.
Peter's denial of his Master only gave Peter
a sore heart to carry around with him, a
living sleepless ache, all the days of his
life.
Benedict Arnold's treason merely accom
plished all that it possibly could accomplish
the disgrace and ruin of Benedict Arnold;
the United States is still here. Its birth
day wasn't postponed a week by any man's
treachery. The boodle alderman who stole
himself rich out of the city treasury only
made a jail-bird of one man. Every time
yon do a foolish thing, my boy, you hurt
yourself. Be good to yourself and you can't
help loving your neighbor.
To thine own self be true;
And It must follow, as the night the day,
Thou can's t not then be false to any man.
The Liabl llty to Break Bales.
Now there are three good resolutions yon
nave enterea on the record lor this year.
That's enough for any fellow to forget and
break. I wouldn't have too many laws ou
my private statute books if I were you. It
only requires ten commandments "to keep
the whole world straight; three ought to be
enough for you. And they will be. Some
times they will be too many for you. I
reckon you will break two or three of them
this morning. But don't let that discourage
you. The very fact that you consider it
necessary to make them is evidence that you
are more tlmn liable to break them.
We don't make laws to restrain people
from doing what they don't want to do, but
quite the reverse. If yon should go into a
country and find in their statutes nine laws
in every ten laws against stealing you would
say "this is a nation of thieves." When
you observe that the greatest question of
reform oftcnest discussed, constantly brought
forward, never changing and always agi
tated, is temperance, yoa naturally say
"the prevailing vice among these people is
drunkenness."
And you are correct. Your good resolu
tions are so many barriers you erect be
tween yoursel' and your faults, and you are
going to try to break them down every day,
and some "day, I very much fear, you will
succeed. Well, when you do put the
barrier up again. Don't make new resolu
tions; splice the old ones. That makes them
stronger than new ones, if you do it prop
erly. You may break the same resolution
in a new place, but that splice will hold.
Before you get to the end of the year it will
be all splice: then you will have a hawser
that will hold you.
I am almost always a little suspicious of
a resolution that is never broken, or, at
least, badly strained. One year, being
wearied with my many failures, I resolved
that I would introduco among others
that went to the Speaker's desk a
few resolutions that I would surely keep.
So I wrote on the first page of my new diary:
The Danger In 3Iaklng IJesolntlon.
Eesolved, That I will not kill a preacher
this year.
Well, sir, it is a, notorious fact, in the
church of which I nm a shining sleeper,
that that very year, driving my pastor and
two deacons over to a prayer meeting in
Gladwyne Chapel one night, I ran over a
bank as steep as a stone wall, in the dark,
and came within an accident policy of
breaking the necks of the whole confer
ence. I tell you what, my boy, I made all
histc to rescind that resolution. There is
something about a resolution that impels a
fellow to' break it. He wants to try it
You give a boy a delicate vase to hold,
and tell him how precious it is, nnd to be
very, very careful with it, and he will take
hold of it with both hands at first, and
then withdraw one finger at a time to see
how near he can come to letting it fall
without dropping it When be plays "toss
ball" against the side of the house, he
always plays it just as close to the window
as ne can, until at la&i ue gues uiruugu iu
Aftenthat aud the event immediately sub
sequent the end of the barn is good
enough for him.
Well, this is a long sermon, but you can
stand it once a year. Itun along to church
now; got any money for the basket?
"You've got enoush for a church collec
tion?" Well, not In that sneaking little
nest of pennies you haven't. You want to
make one resolution as an important appen
dix to the others, and you want to stick to
it, too; it properly belongs as a sub-head un
der the third:
IteROlved, That I will put into the contribu
tion baiket every SunUay at least tho prico
of a theater ticket
Specification: And you don't sit in the
gallery, cither, my boy; I know where you
sit And you don't go alone, too. I know
you. And I'm mighty easy with you not to
put the cost of a December bouquet on your
contribution; I know what it cost3 you
when you do the thing about right But
I'll let you off with the cost of the ticket.
And I'll speak to the deacons about hav
ing a collection taken at every service,
niaybe.
But I won't do that right away. I will
be gentle with you if you tote fair and give
the church as much as.you give the opera
house. And, give it just as willingly. It
you're going to give it with a snarl and a
protest every time, keep it and buy yourself
pocket mirrors with it. Then you can look
at the meanest man living every time vou
get alone. And that will remind you that
you promised to be good to yourself.
BOBKBX J. BUBMTXJL,
WARMTH BY CURRENT.
The Alternating Electric System Put
to a Novel Purpose.
HEAT IN THE PUDDLING WORKS.
A Kew Application for Street Traction
Snapped Up hj lerkcs. .
FORCIKG CABMEN TO BE HONEST
WHITTEIT fob tiie pispatcti.
Nikola Tesla, who in a lecture before the
American Institute of Electrical Engineers
prophesied that before long we should be
able to dispense with wires in the electrical
lighting of our houses, states, in a commu
nication to the fEledrical Engineer, that he
has received many letters from noted phy
sicians inquiring as to the physical effects
of alternating currents of high tension. Mr.
Tesla holds that as a body perfectly well in
sulated in air can be heated by simply con
necting it with a source of rapidly alter
nating high potential, such a phenomenon
ought to be utilized. The human body is,
for the purpose, a fine conductor, and if a
person insulated in a room, or no matter
where, is brought into contact with snch a
source of rapidly olternatinghigh potential,
the skin is heated by bombardment just as
effectively, if not more so, than it would be
by the pounding of the masseur.
Mr. Tesla suggests that with properly
prepared apparatus physicians might find
in this treatment a means for the cure of
varions types of disease. The heating
would be superficial, and would result
whether the person operated on were in bed
or walking around the room, whether
dressed in thick clothes or reduced to
nakedness. In fact, as Mr. Tesla graphic
ally puts it, it is conceivable that a person
entirely nude at the North Pole might
keep himself comfortably warm in thi3
manner, i This may appear a somewhat ex
travagant conception, but during the next
few years we shall in all probability become
accustomed to far greater marvels in elec
trical development
Evolution of JZlectria.l Nomenclature.
Electricians have a great weakness for new
words. An electrical dictionary was issued
two or three years ago containing 4,000 or
5,000 words that have a special and distinct
ive meaning in electricity, and it is stated
that the number is nearly doubled in the
second edition. When the Electrical Con
gress meets in Chicago in 1893, a leading
part of its work will be the selection of
names for some more electrical units and the
determination of their size. At the con
gress held recently iifFrankfort, the Ameri-"
can delegates wanted the name ".Henry ap
plied to a new unit, but action was post
poned until 1893, it appearing that some of
the best informed European members had
never heard of Joseph Henry, and knew
nothing of his great contributions to the
science of magneto-electricity, a field of in
vestigation inuhieh he stood shoulder to
shoufder with Faraday. But electricians do
not wait for congresses. Thus it is now pro
posed to use the word "telephon" for a tele
phone message, just as we use the word
"telegram" for a telegram message. Elec
trical execution they call "gerricide,"after
its chief advocate, who Las a name which is
already ingloriously embalmed in "gerry
mander." For "electric motor" it is now
suffeested that "dvnamotor" be used, on the
ground that "motor" bj; itself means noth
ing special, and that it is better to use one
word than two.
Dark Horse In Electrical Traction.
At the present moment there is not s
single electric road operating in this coun
try in which the conductors that carry enr
rent to the motors are placed in a conduit,
as contra-distinguished from the overhead
trolley wires. Europe ha3 two of these
roads one at Buda-Pesth in Hungary, and
one at Blackpool in England. Neither is
very extensive, and it is difficult to get at
the facts about their operation. The Hun
garian road ha3 lately Deen extended with
an overhead system,. which would indicate
that the conduit has found its limitations;
but on the other hand it is reported that
Yerkes, the Chicago street railway mag
nate, has secured the right to introduce it
in Chicago in time for the World's Fair.
Of the Blackpool road it may be stated that
it has just finished its seventh year by de
claring a dividend of 7 per cent, and by
placing a neat little sum to reserve. The
road is chiefly used by summer visitors to
the watering place, and it is worth noting
that the principal trouble comes from the
clogging of the conduit by the sea sand
blown in by heavy winds. American elec
trical engineers say that our extremes of
climate, heavy snows and long thaws are
against the successful operation of any con
duit here; but there are at least a score of
sanguine inventors in this line who contra
dict them flatlv.
Protection From Furnace Heat,
The heat of puddling furnaces is of ten so
great as to seriously affect the health of
workmen, besides telling seriously on the
aggregate of work done in a given time. In
some of the large -puddling works iu Ger
many a provision has been made, in the
shape of a shield, whereby the workmen are
protected from the furnace hca. The shield
consists of a rectangular iron screen sus
pended from an overhead rail, which can
be made to cover the whole working side of
the furnaces, and which can be pushed aside'
when not required, or when it interferes
with the work. The lower end is bent into
a gutter, having a slight fall in the direc
tion of its length, and the upper edge is
provided on .the inside, that nearest the
furnace, with a pipe perforated with small
holes about three-quarters of an inch apart,
which is connected with the pipe supplying
water for cooling the sides of the furnace
bed. When in use, the inside of the screen
is kept constantly wet from the supply pipe,
the jets trickling down the screen. A notch
is left at the bottom of the screen for the
passage of the rabble, and a small inclined
plate is provided for the cinders to run
over. With these exceptions the whole of
the furnace is screened by the water-cooled
plate.
Electrical Test of 31111c.
The Wheatstone Bridge is well known to
electricians as the instrument by which re
sistances are compared. An ingenious
German chemist contends that it will-make
a very efficient lactometer. His proposal is
to determine the quality of the nii)k by as
certaining its electrical resistance, the idea
underlying the process- being, in the first
place, that a rise in resistance might be ex
pected with increase of lat, and a similar
augmentation follow on dilution with
water. Unfortunately, in the prosecution
of his tests the learned Teuton has come
upon a serious element of uncertainty.
After the execution of some scores of ex
periments, he perceived that an important
factor in the fluctuations observed consisted
in the nature and quantity of inorganic
salts present in the water used for dilution.
So far, however, the painstaking investi
gator is still on sound ground. It the
fraudulent vendor will always indicate to
the analyst the nature of his favorite brand
of diluent, or supply him with a copy ot an
analysis of its mineral constituents, there
seems no reason wby the method should not
be capable, with care, of yielding approxi
mate results.
Purifying an Inferno.
The railway companies of the old London
Underground, after inflicting semi-euffoco-
jtiOB en their yaaicngri for a quarter of a I
century, have turned their attention to the
question of purifying the air in their tun
nels. Between the lines a flat tube is laid,
in which, at short intervals, are valves
opening upwards. To the engine a con
trivance is fixed in the shape of a second
funnel, emitting the smoke downwards.
The opening of this funnel glides over the
surface of the tube between the lines, and
discharges the smoke thereinto, through the
valves, of which on? is always open and in
free communication with the moving fun
nel. The smoke is carried through the
tube to a Boot's blower, half a mile distant,
and is there consumed, having never en
tered the tunnel at alL When theocomo-
nve is traveling mine open air, the down
ward funnel is closed, and the ordinary fun
nel of the engine resumes its functions.
The communication of the moving locomo
tive is said to have been as perfect as that
of a stationary engine and boiler with its
chimney.
The Annoying Itabber Foot Fever.
A correspondent in a rubber journal calls
attention to the injury that may be done
through ignorance of the effect of rubbers
on the feet He says that if a man is suffer
ing from corns he can quickly secure relief
by going to the chiropodist; bnt if he is in
the tljroes of rubber foot fever, he must
adopt a more tedious remedy, and be patient
until the removal of the cause and liberal
bathing of the feet has effected a cure.
Rubbers should only be worn to keep wet
out,'" and they should be removed the
moment the wearer get") indoors. Failure
to note this gives a man wet feet in a far
worse sense than if he had waded through
mud ankle-deep. It is this tendency to
drive all the moisture upwards that has
always prevented the adoption of rubber
soles.
Perfection or Wood Mosaics.
The wood mosaic industry is carried to
great perfection in France. The scale of
colors is extremely rich, as no less than 12,
G00 different shades can be used, so that all
descriptions of paintings can be faithfully
reproduced in this way. The great advan
tage of this mosaic is that in case the colors
should fade they can be restored to their
original freshness by planing, because the
fibers of the wood are entirely permeated
with the paint. The mosaic is durably
affixed to boards with the grain at right
angles, so that no atmospheric change can
affect it
Reforming; the Cabman.
A new cab system has been introduced
into the French capital, which is intended
to make the cabman honest in deed, if not
in intention. Every cab is to be fitted with
an automatic machine which will inform the
passenger of the distance he has traveled,
the time consumed, and the exact fare which
is due to the driver. What must be harrow
ing to the feelings of the dejected Jehu is
the fact that he will be required, under
penalties, to take the shortest way, and to
drive at the rate of eight kilometers an
hour. The new tariff is 75 centimes for
each additional kilometer, an arrangement
which will reduce the present fares. The
only offset to this officious intermeddling of
the civil power with the old established rule
is a regulation which authorizes the cabby
to demand a deposit when a passenger
wishes to enter a building with an exit at
the back.
A Now Drier for I.nmber.
A new lumber drier aims to provide an
apparatus that is both simple and effective,
and that will supply heat in such a manner
as to penetrate the pores of the lumber, dry
ing the same rapidly and perfectly. The
casing or housing of the drier is of rectangu
lar form and provided with a door. A grat
ing a short distance above the floor of the
house supports the lower end of the lumber.
Thiigrating consists of a series of horizon
tal parallel metallic bars extending the
whole length of the casing and supported
by transverse bars secured in the side of
the casing. Between the bars and the floor
of the apparatus is a chamber in which are
placed heating pipes or a heater for supply
ing the drier. Heated air may be used and
supplied from a furnace or other source,
the pipes being perforated on their upper
sides to allow the escape of the hot air into
the drier.
The Theatrophone In Xiondon.
An attempt was made last year in Paris
to establish a '"theatrophone" service so as
to enable people in all parts of the city who
were unable to reach the principal theaters
to turn on as much or as little of an even
ing's performance as they wished to hear,
on payment of a small fee. The
system answered so well that it has
been introduced in many Paris clubs and
restaurants, nnd is extensively patronized
by the mercurial and pleasnre-loving
Frenchmen. London has now followed suit
and a trial has juBt been made of the system
at the Savoy Hotel with a view to its per
manent adoption.
Aluminum In Photographic Apparatus.
Aluminum ought to supersede brass for
photographic lenses, and the metal parts of
cameras. By its use the weig-ht of lenses,
flanges and adapture would be reduced
nearly one-third. The revolving tripod
heads fixed in the bare boards of cameras
could also be made cf aliminnm with
advantage, as they are much too heavy in
brass. The new metal might well be used
for dark slides instead of the heavier and
les3 compact wooden ones now in use. For
developing dishes aluminum would also be
very suitable, as the action of most of the
chemical used in photography is but slight
on it
live TTIre Cutter for Firemen.
A new live wire cutter is made so safe,
by means of insulation, that it is practically
impossible for anyone cutting the most
highly charged wires to receive the slight
est shock. By its use firemen will be able
to clear away "without fear of danger from
current the wires torn down by falling
walls. As it is about five feet long, the
operator can stand on the cros-arms of the
poles, or on a ladder, and reach a consider
able distance.
The Hellmann System or Traction.
The Heilmann tests are now being prose
cuted in France, and it is proposed to equip
a line with the system between Calais and
Paris. The principle on which the engines
are to be constructed will be the renewal of
electrical energy bv utilizing the slopes.
In making the "descent the engines run by
their own weight and' acquired speed, and
by thus setting the dynamo in motion will
restore to the accumulators a portion of the
energy dispensed on the inclines.
Art In Table Knives.
A curious fashion has found its way into
the manufacture ot table Hardware. The
bandies of table knives are now made in
china to match the plates. There are sets
for each course. Those for poultry have
heads of t-e victims and little fluffy chicks
and ducks upon them; those used with the
game course have tiny flights of partridges
and miniature long-legged snipe painted on
them.
Electric Launches for the Seaside.
Electric launches, which have for some
time been quite popular on English rivers,
are now being used for seaside excursions.
A prize has been offered for the best de
sign for an electric launch to ply between
Paignton and Torquay, in Devonshire, and
also for a (w-foot launch to carry 100 pas
seifgers in coast trips.
To Remove Shins From Diagonals.
To bring a shiny diagonal back to appear
ances of respectability, lay the garment on a
table, wet a flannel with cider vinegar, and
rub the shiny places until they have disap
peared. Then hang up the garment in the
shade to dry.
DISEASE nr SCHOOL
No" Child Should Be Admitted Inside
' a ilonth After Recovery.
CHEWING GUM FOR THE TEETH.
People Who Are Always Laughing Get
Wrinkles Early in Life.
M0DBEN ADULTBBATION OP FOODS
fWBITTEJf TOR TILE PISPATCH.l .
"Vital statistics of our large cities show,"
said an eminent health board doctor to me
recently, "that there are many unnecessary
deaths which are caused by carelessness"or
ignorance in sending children to schooL
The recent agitation in Pittsburg is a good
thing, but I am speaking geceraliy and not
of any particular city now. At this season
of the year the deaths from diphtheria,
scarlatina, whooping cough, typhoid fever
and bronchial troubles lead the lists. The
change in the weather, and the approach of
cold waves, make children very susceptible.
to these diseases, and generally they are not
properly isolated by their parents. During
all contagious diseases the utmost separation
should be demanded between the sick one
and the rest of the family.
As it now is, however, the children often
suffer with some of these diseases several
days before they call in medical aid. They
continue to go to school, where, closed in
the hot, crowded rooms, the poisonous
germs are easily given off to other scholars.
Children convalescent from contagious dis
eases are often sent io the public schools
long before the disease has really left them
entirely, and before their clothing has been
disinfected. The result is easily imagined.
Dozens of other children in the school are
taken down with the disease and an
epidemic follows. It ought to be a criminal
misdemeanor for parents to send their
children to school when in this condition.
"Speak about close, ill-ventilated rooms?
Why, I would show vou 10 deaths that have
occurred to children attending, publio
schools through contracting contagious dis
eases from those who are convalescent to
every one that died from taking cold in hot,
close rooms. Ventilation is a great Doon,
and sanitary inspectors may enforce that in
the schools, but the more insidious disease.
just spoken of must first be headed off. A
child that has been sick with any ot tne
contagions diseases should not be allowed to
return to his school duties inside of a montn
alter recovery."
The Adulteration of Food.
With the growth of health foods, which
have been made according to the best prin
ciples of scientific discovery, there has
sprung up adulteration and substitution
which threatens considerable harm to the
purchasers. Heretofore, the warfare has
been conducted against the quack food
dealers in behalf of the manufacturers and
advertisers, but really more important than
either are the consumers and purchasers.
Hca'th food is useful only when it is made
after certain methods whereby all of the
nutritious parts are preserved, while the
chaff is extracted. Any imitation of this
substance which may resemble it in appear
ance and taste will be worse than nothing.
The gennine article must be obtained if the
good is desired.
In the case of wines, brandies, liquors
and other medicinal drinks the same holds
true. The adulterated liquors often work a
direct and specific harm upon the,patient,
while the pure, best brands mighfperform
marvelous cures. The marxets are now
flooded with adulterated and substituted
medicines and health foods, but there are
very few of them that are in any way supe
rior to the ordinary coar.e food prepared by
the housewife for the dinner table. Beef
tea is often sold at the store3 at reduced
rate;, but careful anal v sis has shown that
one would have to drink nearly a gallon of
the stuff to get the nourishment equal to
that contained in half a pound of good,
juicy meat In fact, every article for the
sick, dyspeptic and weak has its adultera
ted counterpart which cannot be too rigidly
avoided.
The grocery is as bad as the drnsgist's.
A great deal of the food is little better than
poison.
Chewln-r Gnm for tha Teeth.
"For people who are too lazy to brush
their teeth twice a day," remarked a dentist
the other day, VI would recommend the
chewing gum habit as a substitute. It may
be that half the girls who chew gnm do it for
the purpose of having white teeth, or it may
be because they like to keep their jaws
going. Whichever way it is, the truth
cannot be denied. Chewing gum a little
each day does improve the teeth. It
cleanses them of tartar and all impure mat
ter, making them as white and pnre as if
just brushed with a toothbrush. The gum
generally gels into every part of the mouth,
rubbing and scouring the teeth way up to
their roots. It also starts the saliva of tha
mouth to flowing, and between the friction
of the gum and the spittle the teeth get a
very good cleansing.
"Did you ever notice that girls who are
habitual gum chewera have white, pearly
teeth? Well, I have. When a girl comes
to me and furtively takes a piece of gum
out of her mouth before entering the chair,
I conclude at once that she has fair white
teeth. She generally docs, too. I advise
many to chew it as a good preserver for
their teeth. They may forget to clean their
teeth with a brush night and morning, but
thjy won't forget to chew their gum."
Jotly.People Get Wrinkles Early.
Wrinkles are not entirely the marks of
time, but they are often the unmistakeabla
outward signs of our inward nature. An
habitual laugher will have wrinkles earlier
than those with grave, sedate faces. Indi
gestion will produce crow's feet in children,
and a.little worry through life will make a
habitual fiown develop into tiny wrinkles
between the eves. Bnt n habitual grin or
laugh on the face produce wrinkles mora
than sickness or disease. The invalid of
many years will often have a perfectly
smooth face unmarked with wrinkles. This
is due partly to the fact that her melan
choly life prevents her from laughing much
and no creases are made in her mobile ace.
Wrinkles are often expressive of an in
ward character which gives true dignity to
the face, which is far more desired than the
perfectly smooth, expressionless face. The
wrinkles which come from care, trouble
and irritation arc the only ones which mar
the face without giving any compensating
value. They should be avoided by eyerr
woman, for it makes bcr old before her
time and robs her of her beauty. The way
not to have such creases is not to think of
trouble, but to look on the (tunny side of
life. A. S. Atkiksox, JL D. "
.Artificial "Voices.
Electriclty.l
A knowledge of the physiology of the
human larynx has made it possible to sup
ply artificial voices to persons who have
been deprived of the one nature gave them,
and a number of cases exist where the cavity
has been opened, and a larynx made of suit
able material with rubber membranes has
been inserted and become practically useful
in speech.
The Shape of It.
Harper's Young Teoplc
"Dennis," cried Pat, "will vez ever pay
me the two guineas yerbwe mc?"
"Sure I will," answered Dennis, readily.
"I'll pay ye, never fear. 'Tis only two
guineas," boy, and I'll pay ye in some shape
or other."
"Faith, Dennif," replied the quick
witted Pat, "ye'd better make it as near tha
shape of two guineas as ye can."