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THE PZETSBURG DISPATCH, SUNDAY, AUGUST 2, 189L
IT
CATCHING 11 COYOTE
ABoara Full of Holes, a little Lard
and Some Strychnine Make-the
Best End of a Trap.
THE WAT TO SKIN AN ANIMAL.
JbTiew of the Weird Holiday Dance ofrtha.
Indians in a Plaza From-a
Xeighboriag Hilltop.
AHOKG JtEW MEXICO'S BHEIEDEniKa
-Experience-With a Sewing Uachlna AgenMYaHiaB'i
XnOTja 5en to Walk Ein
prwTTEarTOR the ttsrATcaaS
TTJMPUr ft to Cali
forny, hey?" ejaculated
the section boss for the
twentieth time, as
though the idea was a
burr in his mind. And
then at last he got be
yond the exclamation
and suddenly cried,
"Banged if I don't
stump it with yon!"
I looked at him in
mild astonishment, but
he was as good as his
word. That very night
he threw up his posi
tion, made arrange
ments about his pay
checks, and packed in
.Xavqfx t, bandanna handker
chief what he wished for the Journey, giv
ing the rest of his scant belongings teethe
laborers. He did not ask whether I desired
his company, nor did it seem necessary to
advise him against the undertaking for
there was little likelihood that one of his
temperament would carry this sudden re
solve very far.
That evening I took time fora little hunt
ing on a plan which caused great wonder
ment to Phillips and his men. The country
was swarming with coyotes, which were
feasting on the countless dead cattle; but it
was very hard to get within rifle-shot of the
eunnintr brutes. I particularly wanted an
other skin just then; and determined to get.
It by a board hunt.
EnUSG COYOTES WITH A BOARD.
Phillips got me a smooth board, an inch.
soger and some lard, at my request, and X
soon made a lapboard. A dozen auger holes,
bored almost through, were filled with lard,
In which were a few grains of strychnine.
and then the surface of the board was simi-J
larly smeared. Carrying this peculiar trap
half a mile from the house I set it in a pass
between the cliffs, and came back to our
Christmas dinner. Had I put out a piece
of poisoned meat Mr. Covote would liava
picked it up and trotted off to die, of course,
but very likely in the next county, where he
would not enrich me. But any carnivorous
animal that comes to a lapboard stays there
licking the lard first from the level, and
then squeezing its tongue into the holes for
what is there, until the sudden spasm comet
and it is too late to run for water.
Sure enough, next morning at sunrise the
largest and handsomest coyote I ever saw,
before or Eince, was lying with his nose not
en inches from the fatal board. I "cased"
him that is, took off the whole skin with
out a cut, pulling the whole body through
the mouth to the utter stupefaction of the
Mexican laborers, who would not believe
ruch a thing possible. That is the hardest
way to ekm an animal, but it is the only
vay to cave the whole pelt without the seri
ous waste from the "tags," which come
where a skin is "pegged out" to dry.
HOW TO rEESEBVE A SETS.
The hide, which comes off like a tight
rlove, inside out, should be re-turned, so
Sat the fiesh side is within, and then
stuffed with straw or any substance which
will fill it out plumply and still allow a
slight circulation of air within. When it
Is perfectly dry it can be slit from chin to
tail with a' sharp knife, and there you have
a perfect and Eightly pelt It took me three
hours of grubbing in the short, dry buffalo
crass to get enough to fill the coyote's suit,
but the skin, which I have yet, was fine
tcough to pay for the trouble.
At 10:30 Phillips bade goodby to his men,
end we started off together. At noon we
came to Laguna, where the Indians were
holding their remarkable holiday dances
as the wild yells that came down the wind
apprised us miles away. Laguna is the
most picturesque of the pueblos that are
easily accessible, and as the railroad runs at
the Very base ot the great dome of rock
upon which the quaint, terraced houses are
huddled, there is no difficulty in reaching
it On the summit of the rock is the plaza.
rr large public square, surrounded on all
sides by the tall house walls and entered
onlv by three narrow alleys. We hastened
tip the sloping hill by one of the strange
footpaths which the patient feet of two cen-
Kavajo UgXtj erect Cradle,
turies have worn eight inches deep in the
solid rock, and entered he plaza. It was a
remarkable sight. The housetops were
brilliant with a gorgeously-appareled
throng of Indian spectators, watching with
breathless interest the strange scene at their
feet
DESCRIPTION OF AN INDIAN DANCE.
Up and down the plaza's smooth floor of
folia rock the 30 dancers were leaping,
marching, wheeling, in perfect rhvthm to
the wild chant of the chorus and to the pom,
pom, of a huge drum. Their faces were
weirdly besmeared with vermilion and upon
ther heads were war-bonnets of eagle feath
ers. Some carried bows and arrows, some
elaborate tomahawks though that was
never u characteristic weapon of the Pueblo
Indians some lances aud shields, and a few
revolvers and Winchesters. They were
stripped to the waist and wore curious skirts
of buckskin reaching to the knee; ponderous
silver belts of which some dancers had two
cr three apiece and an endless profusion of
silver bracelets and rings, silver, turquois
and coral necklaces and earrings, and some
times beautifully beaded buckskin leggins.
j2
The captain or leader had a massive neck
lace of the terrible claws of the grizzly
bear.
For hours we watched the strange, wild
spectacle, until the sinking sun warned us
to be moving, and we reluctantly turned
our faces westward. It was after dark when
we reached the nasty little section house
which comprised Cubero, and we found no
supper and no better bed than the greasy
floor. Phillips had been in high spirits all
day, and was constantly exclaiming about
the surprise of the natives when we should
have walked to California. 'I'll show you
how to do it!" he cried, over and over. "I
used to walk 40 nrlles a day on an average
and carry a surveyor's chain." But at tha
Cubero accommodations he began to grum
ble. nrnjirrs began to be rESsrarxsna
When we awoke next morning the ground
-was six inches deep with snow.'and the
snowstorm increasing. The breakfast was
simply uneatable, and we started off poorly
prepared for so hard a day's work. The
slush and mud made walking very difficult;
and as we were going steadily up graa the
road grew worse with every mile. A hearty
dinner at MoCarty'a cheered us; but as the
afternoon wore on Phillips began to be a
kill-joy. lie was not a protane man, but
his groans, sighs, objurgations of the
weather, and growing pessimism about life
In general made the way almost as cheerful
as a funeral procession.
"Say, don t yon know this Is an awful big
undertaking to walk to Los Angeles," he
broke out every now and then; and it was
plain what shape his thoughts were taking.
He kept falling behind and then running to
catch up, while I plowed ahead as fast as
ever I could. My heart rather smote me,
but it was a meroy to both of us to try his
metal at the outset if he was "infirm of
purpose," the sooner we parted company
the better for both: and if he wasoftho
real stuff this would bring it out.
For only 25 miles that was a very hard
day's work, and when we reached Grant's
in the evening Phillips' walking days were
done. He left me there and took the train
for California, and I never saw him but
once again. From Grant's I went 25 miles
back from tho railroad to the Mexican town
of San Mateo to visit Colonel Manuel
Chaves, the finest rifle shot and greatest
Indian fighter in the Southwest in his day.
FRIENDS WITH AN INDIAN FIGHTER
Our five days' acquaintance then ripened
into one of the dearest of friendships, and
since the old hero's death his g llant sons
have grown near to me in companionship
through dangers that draw men together.
There was the truo Spanish hospitality a
universal welcome which the very name of
the home betokens, for it is Sucasa, "Your
Own House." The time passed very
quickly with hunting and exploring by day,
T
and filling the long winter evenings with
song and quaint Spanish games with tho
cordial household. Three wintry days I
spent digging in a wonderful American
Pompeii.
Three-quarters of a mile from the Chaves
homestead is a low, irregular mound,
within a few rods of which one might pass
without a suspicion of its interest. For the
hundred years that mound has been known
to civilized people, it kept its secret well
hidden until 1884. But one day a savage
windstorm gouged out a lot of sand from its
flanks, and a passer noticed the top of a re
markable wall peeping out. Don Amado
Chaves, eldest son of the brave old colonel,
and now Territorial Superintendent of Pub
lic Instruction, had excavations made which
showed that the mound was tho grave of an
entire prehistoric pueblo burled by the
drifting sands of countless ages. The whole
of the first story is still standing, though
all the rooms were choked with debris from
the walls of the second and third stories.
The masonry is of stone, and wonderfully
good. Down one of those time-tried walls
the point of a spade slides as down a planed
board.
THE BUEIED EUTNS OB" NEW MEXICO.
This was the first of the countless wonder
ful ruins in New Mexico with which I
became familiar; and exploration of hundreds
of others since has not destroyed my interest
in that ttrange, buried, prehistoric city of
tlie aborigine at ban Mateo. The pueblo
was built in one enormous iort-house in the
shape of a rectangle inclosing a court
yard. The outer walls were nearly 200 feet
long on a side, and about 30 to 40 feet high.
Not a door or loophole of any sort broke
that wall, and the only access to the court
yard, upon which all tho doors and
"windows" opened, was by ladders which
could be pulled up over the wall, thus leav
ing the inhabitants inside their strange
stone box very safe from any foes of their
day. Even tne doorways upon the little
Inner square, and those from room to room
within, were so tiny that a foe already in
the house could easily be overcome as he
squeezed through wee openings only
about 16 inches wide and 3 feet or less in
height.
In my excavations for I shouldered a
spade and dug there enthusiastically, as
would any young American who had a
chance I uncovered several of these "toy"
doors, which interested me greatly. I did
not then know that these were the charao
teristio doorways of all ancient pueblo
architecture, these harassed people pre
ferring domestio inconveniences for the
sake of greater safety against their innumer
able foes; and I was quite ready to accept
the theories of equally green folk (who,
however, are not too modest (o write "scien
tific" books) that such ruins were peopled
by a race of dwarfs.
A 6KELETON 'WITH BEAUTrFUL SATE.
But despite the strength of its solid stone
walls, this house town of perhaps 200 peo
ple naa met tne late oi so many oi tbe
pueblos of the old days, and tragedy is
written all across its mysterious ruins. The
lower rooms (which are all perfect except
as to roof) are choked with the debris of the
upper ones full of charred remnants of
roof and rafter. The pueblo was taken in
war doubtless by surprise, for it should
easily have withstood any assault with the
weapons of those days, and doubtless by the
Navajos, who roamed thickest there many
of its people were slain, and then the fire
brand of the savage victors did its work
and tumbled the ruined home upon the
careless grave of the dead owners.
There are many, many human bones under
that ancient wreck, and Don Amado once
dug up, in the largest room of all, the per
fect skeleton of a woman, her long, silken,
black hair still beautiful as in the forgotten
days when she washed it at the little acequia
irrigating ditch whose course can still be
dimly traced along the valley. I tound
many arrow heads and implements of petri
fied wood and volcanic glass, a few finely
made bone beads, and bushels of fragments
of pottery, still beautifully bright of hue
after all these centuries, and many other in
teresting relics.
TTIE SIGHT OF A LIFETIME.
Getting back at last to the railroad at
Grant's with a whole cargo of curios of all
sorts, I packed them for shipment and then
enjoyed a brief visit with the jolly owbovs
of the 99,000-acre A L O ranch on whose
annual round-ups I have since had many a
glorious time and some other interesting
experiences. Acoma, the strange skv city
7a . &S& Xn
,-. A 14 a & IVim W
NAVAJO CHTJBOS
of the Queres Pueblos, and in many ways
the most remarkable town on the globe, is
only a morning's gallop southeast from
Grant's, and is the sight of a lifetime.
Fancy a table 500 feet high and with a top
of 70 acres; one solid rock, supported not by
legs, but perpendicular cliffs, approachable
only by dizzy stairways in the cliff, but one
of which the chamois himself could climb,
since on all the others one must take not
only foothold, but a strong clutch with the
hands; and upon that titanio rock table or
Island a Pueblo town of three-story ter
raced houses, with over 600 swarthy inhabi
tants. I have been to Acoma a great many
times since then, but never does it lose its
matchless charm. It is the most picturesque
little city in tne world.
I got a large collection of tho very hand
some tinajas (earthen water jars), made by
the Acomas, who are the most expert potters
of all the Pueblos, and many other valuable
mementos of this strange people.
PICKED UP A SEWXNQ MACHETE AGENT
When Shadow and I started West again
from Grant's, we had acquired a new com
panion and a much worse one than weak
kneed but kind-hearted Phillips. It was a
Pennsylvania sewing machino agent whom
we will call Locke. He had seen in the
Albuquerque papers something about our
Jenrney, and got off the cars at Grant's to
accompany us. He had left a dollar or two,
and a great wealth of confidence, and nearly
"talked our ears off;" He was a gentleman
of chronio woes, and in the first hour of ac
quaintance told me sorrow enough to have
swamped the Great Eastern had she tried to
carry them alL
For the first few miles the walking, though
bad, was not seriously so; but we were fast
climbing the Continental Divide, gaining
about 100 feet-in altitude with every mile
and with every mile progress grew more
difficult. By noon we were in six-inch
snow, and this gre continually deeper, un
til it was almost knee-deep. We cooked
lunch over a fire of chips, hacked with
my hunting knife from a dead cedar, and
pushed on. Shadow was enjoying himself
hugely, for the country was alive with cot
ton tails, and in the deep snow he caught
several; but we bipeds were not quite so
happy. My companion having told all his
hoarded troubles, now found new ones to
engage his attention. He kept wishing he
were dead, and at last declared that he
would kill himself if he only knew howl It
was very hard to keep from laughing; but
with a very solemn face I handed him one
of my six-shooters, saying: "Here, help
yourseu i xou are quite rignu -
SAT DOWN AND BEGAN CBYTNG,
But he gave me a look of ineffable re
proach, pushed away the proffered panacea
tor his woes, and declared that ho didn't see
how people could be such heartless brutes I
As night came on matters looked rather
gloomy. It had become very cold, the
snow was fully knee deep, and we were wet,
cold and hungry. At last, when it was
quite dark, tho man of woes sat down in the
snow and refused to go any farther. I tried
to cheer him up, for Chaves could not be
more than five miles ahead; but he declared
that he would not bodge another Inch he
was going to die right there and began to
cry like a child. It is a dreadful thing to
hear a man cry, even when you feel con
tempt for his tears; and for a moment I
even thought of taking him up ioroibly and
carrying him. But as he weighed 170
pounds and 1 145 that was out of the ques
tion. Just then I caught the blessed glimmer of
a light among the pinons only a few hun
dred yards away. Even this did not serve
to start Locke and I had to get him up by
brute force and soma verv kiv.ito throoto
We stumbled through tho snow to a poor
little Mexican ranch house, where the
courteous owner and his huge wife were very
kind. They toasted us before the blazing
mud fireplace and turned themselves out of
bed to give a comfortable couch to two bed
raggled, disreputable-looking strangers, and
then that foolish Locke lay awake all night,
fearing that if he went to sleep our hosts
would cut our throats for his dollar. Poor
Juan Arragon and poor fat wifel They long
ago went to a world where I hope they were
as hospitably cared for as they cared for us.
In the morning they gave us tne last morsel
inmesnaDoy little noine, and proudly de
clined my proffered money. Their hospital
ity was not for sale it was from the heart,
as with all their kindly race.
THE NEW GARDEN OF THE GODS.
The day's walk to Coolidge was hard by
reason of the snow, but was rewarded by
the first mail I had had in a month. This
wasthe only town of 100 people (except the
Indian pueblos) between Albuquerque and
Winslow, nearly 300 miles.
Northwest of Coolidge I was interested in
the wonderful scenery of the "New Garden
of the Gods," which is full of wonderfully
colored and strangely eroded rock-monuments
as the garden near Colorado Springs,
but is far less known. The rock called Nav
ajo Church is its most familiar wonder.
There is little else of interest until Manue
lito, the last station in New Mexico, except
a curious coward who kept an Indian trad
ing post at Defiance. On a shelf which went
around under the whole long counter of his
stone store, he had more than 100 loaded and
cocked rifles and six-shooters; and he took a
great delight in showing how rapidly he
could whirl from the goods on the nigh
shelves, snatch a firearm in each hand, and
"throw down" on us a rather risky ooiect
lesson. He had murdered a Navajo Indian
boy cruelly, and feared retribution. At
Manuelito, Locke said his shoes were get
ting thin, and he guessed he'd take the cars.
His departure was a relief, for Shadow alone
was much better company.
BELICS OF NAVAJO PEIENDSHTP.
Here, too, we scraped an interesting ac
quaintance with the Nayajos, and acquired
a load of their characteristic treasures in
cluding a lot of the barbaric silver bracelets,
belt-disks, earrings, etc., and a magnificent
blanket of their utatchless weaving. Among
my Indian friends here was Klah (the "Left
Handed"), a bronze giant, with whom I af
terward had some very amusing adventures.
He is a brother of Manuelito, the venerable
head chief of the Navajo nation of 20,000
souls.
It is painful to recall the day after we
left Manuelito and crossed the line into
Arizona,for thenceforth the whole tramp
was an experience one would not care to re
peat, though it is well to have had it once;
The walking was still atrocious. We had
passed Billings with a hasty look at the
wonderful petrified forest where the
ground for miles is covered with giant
trunks and brilliant chips of trees that are
not only stone, but most splendid stone,
agate of exery hue, with crystals of ame
thyst and smoky topaz, and veins clearly
visible and camped in a deserted Navajo
hoganda. Starting out in the raw, gray
dawn, we soon crossed the fresh trail of a
deer. The animal had gone up a "draw,"
and thinking to head him off, I started to
climb the precipitous face of a 60-foot mesa
of shade. Shadow sat whining below, and
watched as I climbed cautiously the crum
bling ledges. ' Halfway up, as my weight
came upon a jutting shelf.it suddenly broke
beneath my teet. The ledge to which I was
holding crumbled, too: and in a shower of
rock I fell back sprawling through the air
and landed upon tho jagged debris 20 feet
below, and knew no more.
C. F. Ltjmmis.
TIMED D
CTBAXSLATED rOB TUX DISPATCH.
Far, far from here, in a land where there
Is no winter, but where continual summer
reigns,there lived a good King who had two
children whom he loved very dearly. The
Queen had been dead several years, when
the King brought to the palace another
wife, who was very beautiful, but vain and
selfish, and greatly disliked the young
Prince and his sister. She paid a farmer a
large sum of money to carry off the little
girl, and told the King sho had gone into a
distant country to visit friends. The Prinoe
grieved so much for his sister, that the
Queen, fearing he would tell his father the
truth, said to him:
"I wish you were a bird and would fljH
far, far away."
Scarcely were the words spoken when the
handsome youth became a large eagle, and
with sharp cries he flew high into the air
and soon disappeared from sight. The
Queen was thoroughly frightened; but
when a search was made for the missing
Prince she pretended to know nothing
about bim. The King mourned the loss of
his brave, manly son, and for several years
continued to hope that he would be found.
In the meantime the Princess had been
carried by the farmer to his home, and was
there compelled to do all kinds of hard,
rough work. She was obliged to labor even
in the fields. Her delicate hands became
hard and brown, and her fair face was
burned with the sun. She thought often of
her brother, and wondered why he did not
oome to take her away, or tell her father
where she was that he might send her halt
The farmer paid no heed to her entreaties,
and only laughed when she begged to be
taken home. It happened one day that the
King went riding past the farmer's home,
and when the Princess, who was in the yard,
saw the royal coaoh advancing, she ran out
into the road and cried to her father that ha
would take her back to the palace. The
King recognized his daughter, and was very
angry to think that his dear child should
have lived in such a plare. He ordered the
farmer to be severely beaten and to be ban
ished from the country. He then took tha
Princess to the palace where she was again
tormented by her cruel stepmother. By
this time the Princess was 1C years old, and
was so beautiful that people came for many
miles only to gain a glimpse of her fair face.
The Queen became verv jealous of her lovely
daughter, and determined to destroy her
beauty. She went to a fountain in the park
where the Princess snent much time, and
taking in her hand a toad that was hopping
along the path, she said:
"When the Princess comes here to-day.
hop upon her head and wish that she may
become as ugly as you are."
The toad did as it was told and rested a
moment on the maiden's head. The next
moment when the Princess was about to ad
mire her fair image reflected in the clear
water, she was terrified to see that her skin
had grown yellow and wrinkled, her largo
black eyes were little and green, and her
long, wavy hair was stifl and black. The
little girl wept bitterly, and then she
thought:
"I shall go away from here and hide my
self in some dark forest, so that no one will
be frightened by my hideous form. Per
haps, too, I shall find my brother; for I am
sure that he was sent away by the Queen
and that he Still lives."
Without returning to the palace the
Princess hastened away, unattended and
nnseen, from the place. For two days she
traveled, hiding in the bushes when she caw
anyone approaching. On the third day she
camo to a dense forest. Here she thought
few people would enter, and she sat down
to rest. Not far away rippled a clear
stream, where the Princess satisfied her
thirst and then bathed her heated brow. As
the cool water touched her face the little
girl was surprised to find that her beauty
returned, uer sew Decame again smooth
and white, her eyes large and brown, and
her hair light and wavy. But she said to
herself:
"I shall not return to the palace. I shall
seek my brother, who has perhaps suffered
more than I have."
As the Princess sat by the stream and
bound up her long hair, the birds of the
forest ceased taeir singing to admire tha
beautiful maiden. The doves flew near,
and one rested on her shoulder.
As the little girl continued her way, she
was met by an old woman, who carried a
basket tilled with bread, bhe oflered soma
to the Princess, who, being , hungry, ac
cepted it, and then asked:
"Have you ever seen the King's son in
this forest?"
"No," answered the old woman, "but I
have sometimes seen an eagle, on whose
head is a golden crown."
"I am sure that is my brother," cried the
Princess, "can you tell mo .how to find
him?"
"Travel on through this forest for two
days," said the old woman, "then you will
come to the ocean. You may be obliged to
wait some time; but if you are patient, the
eagle will surely come.
The Princess did not hesitate to under
take the journey. When night came she
lay down on the soft moss, and slept un
harmed until morning. On the evening of
the second day, the Princess came to the
ocean. Ko living creature was to be seen on
the sandy shore, and the waves moaned
sadly: All night the little girl watched in
the lonely place for the eagle, and in the
morning, just at sunrise, she saw the great
bird flying over the water. A golden crown
glittered on his head, and the Princess felt
sure that this was her lost brother. She
called him by .name. The eagle paused in
its flight, and then slowly descended. As
he touched the ground, the Princess was
overjoyed to see the Prince in his own form,
standing before her. The Princess begged
her brother that he would go at once with
her to their father's palace; but the Prince
said:
"My dear sister, I cannot go with you.
My home is now a lonely island, far out in
the sea. There I live among the crags and
rocks, never seeing a human creature. Once
in each month, on the day when the moon
is full, I regain my own form, and then I
always come to this shore. I have hoped so
many times to meet my father or some ono
from his court, but I never expected to see
you. .ttow did you ntid your way here?
Tho Princess told how cruelly her step
mother had treated her, described her
mceeingwith the old woman, and then
said:
"Now, my dear brother, since I have
found ypu, I shall never return to the
palace, but shall always stay with you."
"Alas," said the Prince, "I must return
to-night to my rocky island. You would
find it very dreary there, and besides, I
know not how you could get there, for we
havo no boat."
"Could yon not carry me on your back?"
asked the Princess. I am small, and you
would find me a light burden. I do not tear
the loneliness of the island, and I should be
much happier there than at the palace."
The Prince consented to his sister's wishes.
All day the Princess and her brother
wandered along the shoro and in the forest,
talking of all that had happened since they
last met. In the evening tne Prince, having
again become a bird, spread his wings, and
talking his sister upon his back, flew away
to the island, which consisted only of bare
rocks piled together so as to make a large
cave. There were no trees nor flowers to
be seen, only great quantities of sea weed
were washed up by the waves. As the
Princess entered the cave, where she was
to sleep, her brother said:
"Perhaps you will dream how we may be
rescued trom this lonely life." I
The next morning the Princess said.
"O, brother, I have really dreamed how
you can be saved. The old woman whom I
met in the forest appeared to me and said it
yon would plunge into the stream where I
bathed you would become a Prince and
always remain so."
At the time of the next full moon the
brother and sister left the island, and with
the Princess riding on the eagle's back
reached the sandy shore. There they met
the old woman, who guided them to the
stream where the Prince was freed from
the enchantment They had no trouble in
finding their way to the palace, and when
the King heard their story he banished the
wicked Queen to the rocky island, and the
three lived happily for the rest of their
lives. Paxsie.
SOME ENIGMATICAL NUTS.
TnzxIesxbrHie Little Folks That Will Keep
Their Brains Bnsy for Most of the Week
If They Solve Them Correctly Home
Amusements.
Addreu communication for IhU department
4oE. K. Cbxdbottrsc, Ixrwitton, Mains.
1653 AN EI.OQUE.NT FIEE-SCREEX.
J 1
1
.3
- n
They were sitting In irontof a blazing
fire when sfio complained of tbe beat ot tbe
flames. There was no fire-screen at hand,
but he found a pleooof card-board, which he
cut Into the shape shown above.
"There," said he, softly, "is a flre-screen
whioh will tell you whom I love without
giving her name."
Tho card-board waa not used as a flre
screen, but the blushing maid, with the aid
of a penknifo, soon cut out a word of four
letters and an exclamation point; in doing
which she utilized the entire flre-scrcen,
without any waste.
Bow did she do it, and what was the word.?
J. H. Eezjlsdix.
1654 OHABADZ.
He who shares the hospitable
Primal, at a stranger's table,
Should remember tbatthej&w
Is more than Just a pKee to dine;
The contents of the total broken,
Ko word should 'gainst the h03t bespoken.
This is Arabian courtesy,
But suitable for you and me.
1655 TBIPLE LETXEE ENIQ2TA.
In "windows," open to the sun:
In "honest toil," now Just begun)
In "good or bad," take either one;
In "famished deer," whose race is run;
in wnite or yeiiow," now ino inn.
Tou'Il find complete
Is "Bitter Sweet." Iowa Box.
1056 TJIASIONB.
L A letter. 2. To drop the bait gently. 8.
Plexuses. 4. Inferences. 6. Spiritual de
spondency. 6. Dissolute. 7. Shield shaped.
6. Probes (Surg). &. Spots. 10. Befnsal. 11.
A letter. Tolly W. Qooara.
1657 cuBTAiMnaro,
To cause sharp pain, in certain way,
By Nature's weapons, all does say.
Curtail, and you will have, in one,
The total past, already done.
Then, one is used to curb a horse)
While all is one who cheats, of course.
A.L.
J58 NTjaTERTfUTV.
The 1, S, 8, 0 is a kind of a harpj
Solvers, ponder this well, be Bharpi
t, C, 6 is a personal pronoun,
And 1 to 6 was a man of ronown.
IowaBot.
1659 SQTTAKQ,
J. Blankets worn in Mexico. 2. To consti
tute. 3. To secure by an inclosure a second
time. 4. One who rectifies. S. One of a
air (Pine Arts). 6. To burn incense (Obstl.
.Started (Obs., Webs. Unab.).
Tilly W. Hooonn,
1660 JDECAPIXATIOJC
If von ore rash
Enough to eat
Too much green trash.
It may completa.
Without a doubt
'Twill make you two,
As you'll find out,
If thus you do.
1C61 TEANSPOSHIOH'.
A.L.
A man up in Primals, in Me.,
Had seconds which caused him great pe.
And this stubborn young Mr.,
Nursed many a blr.;
Good counsel was tendered in ye.
H. O.Busasis.
1662 HALS' EQTTAEB.
1. A pine. 3. Musical tones. S. Having open
spaces at intervals. L Imitated 5. One
who undermines. 6. A nail. 7. A contrac
tion. 8. A pronoun. 0. A letter.
If.os Mask.
1663. RIDDLE.
Above the body and the mind.
Above tho noblest of mankind,
I riso: 1 overshadow you;
I'm sometimes felt a burden, too.
Badge of high honor and command,
I'm given by the Pope's own hand
, Or, a mere straw, I olten show
Which way, and now, tho wind may blow.
M.C.3.
AUGUST PEIZES.
A lively competition is predicted for Au
gust, and each competitor should do his best.
Apnzo will bo given for each of the best
tnree lots ox answers lor cae moma. com
mence this week, and send in the solutions
in weekly installments,
ANSTVEES.
1615 "A cat has nine lives."
16it 1. Ia-me. 2. Go-at.
1615- POTBNTIZEB
OPINIATED
T ITTERED
E NT I C E K
NIECES
T AE E S '
I TEE
ZED
ED
S
1646 Words.
1617 Stocking: Gin, ink, stiok, coin, tick
biouk, sung, (ins, xing, SKin.
1648 Bather, breath.
1649 O A h O R I O
A 8 A E O N B
LAM ENT S
OE E A D E 3
E OND UK B
I NTEKN S
C E S S E fa T
1630 Beverages.
1651 Enrtish. Polish. Spanish.
Sicilian,.
Italian, African, Australian, American.
1K)J isiacic, lacK.
The Indigo Bird.
rwEITTEN TOR THE DISPATCH.
What bird is that?
That beautiful bird is tho Indigo Bunting,
I found him, Ht last, after long timo hunting.
, He lives on the seeds
Of different weeds, '
With sometimes a few berries,
Or two or three cherries,
ny way or dessert.
And it does not hurt
Us a bit to give him a few;
At least, so I think,
Don't you t
With his suit of blue he is quito a gay fellow,
But his wile wears a dress of brow nish yel
low, For she stays at home and attends to the
nest.
While he roams abroad, as it suits him best.
Auht Clare.
The Indtoo Bird.
THE BOOK OF HOSEA.
Power of the Disorderd, Disconnected
Sermons Found There.
MONSTROUS EVIIS OP THE TIME.
How the Untaught Teacher learned the
lesson of Forgiveness.
BTOEI OP HIS UNFORTUNATE "WIFE
nvaiTTET roit Tins cispatcji.I
The ancient Kingdom of David and Solo
mon had been rent in twain. In the South
wa3 Judah; in the north was Israel. Some
times the northern kingdom was called
Israel, and sometimes Ephrain (from its
chief tribe) and sometimes Samaria.
Jereboam n. was reigning in Samaria. It
was the eighth century B. O. The land
was at the crisis and zenith of its power and
glory. The decrees of the King reached
north to the valley of the Orontes and south
beyond the Jordan to the borders of the
great wilderness. The laud was externally
prosperous. It was spiritually bankrupt.
It had vast riches? it had no religion. To
ruch a condition of things there can be but
one outcome, and that is national disaster.
That is the universal lesson of history. Ko
nation which cares more for money than it
does for morals has ever endured, nor can
endure. No nation which disregards the
moral law of God can have prosperity. It
may posses an army and navy; it may have
a system of excellent and efficient schools
reaching into every country village; it may
send its merchant ships to every sea, laden
with the produce of its fields and its mills;
but it is doomed. That is
THE LESSON OF EXPEEIENCE.
"We have a system of politics in this
country which, we are assured, has no
knowlege of the Ten Commandments.
Away with it, then! It is a conspiracy
against the Eepnblie. It means inevitable
disaster. Jereboam n. cared no more for
the Ten Commandments than he did for the
eight satellites of Saturn. And the inevi
table disaster came.
Amos, that fearless preacher, gave fair
warning of it. There is a Hebrew tradition
to the effect that they laid hold 'on Amos,
there at Bethel, and beat him within an
Inch of his lifeVand sent him backto Tekoah
half dead. That is not unlikely. Amos
said himself that if a man had any prudence
be wouia Keep silence in tnat evil time.
There are occasions, however, when a man
has no business to be prudent and keep
silence. He must speak and take the con
sequences. It is very likely that they gavo
that plain-spoken preacher a good beating.
But that did not hinder the disaster. Amos
spoke the truth, and no beating of the
truth-teller could change it, Nobody can
keep back truth with a club. Amos brought
his warning message and they put him to
silence and went on in their wicked ways,
and every word he said came true.
A BANQUET 07 DEATH.
Jereboam died and anarchy reigned in his
stead. The land was filled with confusion
and violence. King after king came to the
throne with his hands red with murder,
only to be murdered in his turn. The story
of the death of Jereboam's son is a very good
illustration. There was a conspiracy among
the nobles; and one night they made a fine
banquet for the King on the evening of his
birthday, and there was laughter and evil
and unclean jesting and drinking; and little
by little they plied the King with liquor
and got him drunk; and as the light of morn
ing dawned they stabbed him.
Even the course of nature seemed to be
unsettled. In one year there were three
eclipses of the sun. There was a fearful
earthquake. There was drought, and famine,
and blasting, and mildew, and plague, and
fire from heaven. And, over beyond Jor
dan, every year getting more threatening,
was that fierce and mighty enemy, the em
pire of Assyria. It was in Samaria as it was
in Borne in the days of the barbarian inva
sion. eopie were eating and drinKing and
merrymaking, and forgetting God, and be
yond Jordan, as beyond the Bhine and the
Danube, was that vast host waiting for the
word to march. It was at such a time that
the sermons were preached which are gath
ered together in the Book of Hosea.
WHO THE PEEACHEE WAS.
Hosea was a native of the northern king
dom. He knew what Le was talking about,
partly from observation, partly Irom experi
ence. These are the great teachers. Who
ever would himself be a teacher must first
take lessons at their school. Books matter
little Everybody knows that the truths
which got hold of the people are those which
have first get hold of the preacher. Let a
man tell what he has seen with his own eyes,
or experienced in his own life, and men will
listen.
Hosea looks about in this northern king
dom, and sees many things many evil
things. The land is full of cruelty and false
hood, of lying, swearing, and committing
adultery and murder, "blood touching blood."
At the head and front of all the evil are the
priests and princes. They have brought in
idolatry. That is at the center of it
alL They have degraded religion.
They have bowed their knees to calves and
sticks. The leaders are responsible. All
this Hosea, with clear eyes, sees. And he
must speak. He must stand out against
these priests and princes. And stand he
did. Was that easy? Easy tojstand wholly
alone against all the civil and religious
leaders of his time; he an obscure man,
against all these notables and dignitaries
was that easy? It is not hard to-day to be
a minister ot religion, addressing attentive
congregations. But it was hard enough for
Hoseal They called him a fool, a madman;
his life was in danger. Nevertheless,
though no man stood with him, yet he
poke.
THE BEVEXiATION 07 SOBBO'W.
Perhaps he might have kept silence. If It
had not been for a singularly bitter per
sonal experience. Hosea had a great sor
row, and that did more to make him help
ful than anything that had ever happened
10 mm. Anere is tnat gooo in pain, any
how. It does help people to understand.
To Hosea it was a wonderful revelation.
This was the way of it: Hosea had married
a faithless wife. He had seen her, some
think, in the wild dances of the goddess
Asherah, with a wreath of gems in her dark
hair and a robe of scarlet cast about her,
and he had loved her. And in his love he
thought that -he might save her. So they
were married.
Ah, what a mistake that was I Getting
married is one of the most serious adven
tures in the whole world. And marrying
either man or woman with the hope that
come kind of reformation will be eflected
after marriage is an experiment which only
succeeds once in a hundred times. In
Hosea's case it failed, as usual. More and
more his wife grew disloyal and unfaithiuL
At last she left him, and went away into all
manner of abominable living. But one
day, passing through the market-place,
Hosea saw a poor, miserable creature set for
sale as a slave. Andas he looked, behold, it
was his wife 1 She had been cast away by
her lovers, and by the last of them sold into
slavery, offered at the lowest price. Hosea
bought her. Fifteen silver pieces and a few
handfuls.j)f barley he paid lor her, and he
too ncr to his home. He loved ner still.
Day by day she sat deflate by the fireside,
shedding bitter and repentant tears: and
Hosea sat on the other side of the fire,
thinking.
THE LESSON nOSEA LEARNED.
And at last, as he meditated upon his
own misery and his country's misery, the
revelation came. Here he i as, still loving
this poor, faithless, sinful wife of his.
Did not God, then, still love this poor,
faithless, sinful nation? Could it be that
Hosea was better than God? You remem-
"ber that fine poem of Browning's, entitled
"SauL" Tho young shepherd plays his
harp to drive away the evil spirit from his
master, full of sorrow, and tenderness and
pity: and as he nlavs that same revelation
comes to him. He loves Saul, and 10 GodJ
must love Saul. He would give his very
life to help Saul and will not God give
even His life to help Saul, to help all of us
poor, striving, failing people? Isn't that
reason? Thus in the valley of trouble a
door of hope was opened. And Hosea be
came a preacher. He had learned a great
new truth, and he must needs tell it
Out went the preacher from his dark home
Into the streets of the city where he lived
and preached. And at the end he wrote his
sermons down and made this book. Nobody
can set titles to the sermons, or divide them
into firstly, secondly or thirdly. Indeed, it
Is hard to tell where one ends and another
begins, though years have passed between
them. All is unordered, hurried, com
pressed, confused, epigrammatic, hard to
understand. Chapter follows chapter, full
of denunciation, full of lamentation, here
and there a rift in the black clouds, and at
last a blaze of celestial glory.
AN UNTAUGHT FBEACHEB.
But what we have here is the speech of s
man untaught in the schools, haying no gifts
of rhetoric, simply in dead earnest, eloquent
with the eloquence of assurance and enthu
siasm a man who has seen sights, and had
experiences and must speak. Out of the
midst of these hurried words two messages
make themselves plain; the message of
man's duty, and the message of God's love.
Again and again, in different ways, he en
forces the words which Christ quotes from
him: "I will have mercy and not sacrifice."
That is God's idea of man's duty first
mercy and then sacrifice. First mercy,
which means brotherly affection and help
fulness and right living, and then, after
that, the externals of religion. They needed
the lesson then, and we need it now. God
cares for man's heart. Vain was it that
those people of abominable lives offered
their idolatrous worship. The sacrifice of a
contrite heart is what God wants.
HE IS 3I0EE THAN HTJ1IAN.
Again and aga;n, coming in strangely in
the midst of threatening, Hosea preaches
the love of God. God is at enmity with
sin yes. And will punish sin yes. But
He loves the sinner. Hosea has learned
how that is possible. God is not a man,
Hosea says. There is something to .be
thankful for. God is not an ecclesiastic, not
an inquisitor, not a pope, not a priest, not a
puritan. God is more than wise, more
broad minded, more tender hearted, loving
and forgiving than the best of men. God
loves us.
The thunder rolls, the lightning flashes,
the preacher piles epithet upon epithet to
emphasize the anger of Almighty God and
yet God loves. "I will heal them," He
promises at the end. "I will be to them like
the gentle dew. They shall return to me,
and I will return to them." And the stem
sermons of Hosea end in benediction.
Geoege Hodges.
TBAHPING IN THE CAEPATHLUIi
Ilssx)o-rrle Had a Picturesque Costume and
She SmokecJ Cigarettes.
Though the Carpathian Mountains rank
next to the Alps and Pyrenees among the
mountain systems of southwestern Europe,
they are scarcely known to tourists. Sweep
ing in a great semi-circle nearly 1,000 miles
In length, from Presburg, on the Danube,
to Orsova, on the same river, they are
almost wholly Included in Hungary and
Transylvania, both parts of the Austrian
empire. It was to the unfrequented by
paths among these mountains that Kiss
Menie M. Dowie, an adventuresome young
English woman, betook herself in 1890, and
had the temerity to throw herself upon the
hospitality of semi-Oriental people, whose
languages she did not know, and who must
have wondered greatly at the unwonted
spectacle of an unprotected young woman
from a distant land wandering at will among
the mazes of their wild mountains. It was
not a very discreet undertaking; but "all's
well that ends well," and Hiss Dowie has
become quite a heroine.
There was decided novelty in the equip
ment of the unprotected female. Seeing that
she traveled on mountain ponies, along dif
ficult bridle paths, naturally she cut, down
her luggage, and was indifferent as to her
personal appearance. She wore a removable
skirt, and made herself comfortable in mas
culine knickerbockers and native sandals.
She carried a revolver, which, fortunately,
she never had occasion to use, and a pocket
edition of Epictetus, to which she turned
for entertainment and consolation. Still
more useful was her cigarette case. Cigar
ette smoking was not only an unfailing
resource, but an invaluable antidote to the
poisonous atmosphere when she dropped in
upon the natives in their cottage interiors.
FINANCES OF BEAZIL.
The 3111rels Has Gone Down From 5 Cents
to 33 Cents Under Republicanism.
In the last days of the Empire, under the
reign of Dom Pedro IX, says Consul J. O.
Kerbey, writing to The Dispatch from
Para, the Brazilian Beis, the currency of
the realm, was equivalent to Bi cents gold,
its par. To-day, after 18 months' of repub
lican "dictatorship" the same milreis is
worth about 33 cents. These are the undis
puted facts and figures, which speak vol
umes and "faks, as Sairy Gamp says, "is
stubborn things whiten wunt be druv not
mutch."
Columns have been printed and volumin
ous official reports circulated which are
"calculated," as the Yankees say, to ac
count for or to explain to outsiders this
sure and steady decline inthenew Bepublic's
finances. The whole talk by day and by
night seems to he on "exchange." The re
markable feature to a stranger is that all this
"exchange" is posted through the English
banks which receive their instructions over
telegraph wires owned and controlled by
English capital in London, and every
body seems to accept, without question, the
quotations that come up from headquarters
in this manner.
However, the "Consul Americano," at
Para, should not fret about such matters, as
the only transaction that he is at all con
cerned in personally consists in exchanging
all of his salary for his boarding.
BEILF. BIXTOH'S AMBITION.
The Highest Wish of Her Life Now is to He
Presented at Court.
Countess Belle Bilton Olancarty told a
former concert hall friend the other day
that nothing would induce her to appear
upon the stage again. The height of her
ambition, she added, was to be presented
at court, and she meant to "Get there"
soon.
Alden Weston, the American horse
dealer, who is the father of the boy men
tioned so often in this connection, is serv
ing out hi3 sentence of seven years penal
servitude for forging old godfather Isidor
Werthcimer's name and Isabel Dunlo'g in
dorsement to checks on the Bank of Eng
land. Last week he was seen on the plat
form of the London, Chatham and Dover
Bailway station in company with other con
victs, en route to Portland prison. The
wardens in charge being as they always are
on such occasions, very lenient to the pris
oners, allowed Weston to indulge in a Jew
moments' conversation with an acquaint
ance. He was much surprised to hear that
Belle Bilton was now a real Countess. He
complained bitterly of her conduct in send
ing him to prison tor a crime of which she
knew he was substantially innocent. He
sacrificed himself to save her.
Women In the Schools.
For the second year in succession a young
lady (Miss Hester Kussell, this year) has
taken the highest place in the final examin
ation for the iL B. degree of the Koyal
University of Ireland. Both these distin
guished students were educated at the Lou
don School of Jledicine for Women. Miss
Philippa Fawcett has maintained her posi
tion in this year's tripos, being declared
equal to the Senior Wrangler. It is not
uninteresting to hear that Miss Elsie Wind
sor, who has oome out first of her year in
the mathematical tripos, is also tennis
champion at Newnham.
A SIGNAL FOE MAES.
little Hope of Getting Tip a Conver
sation WithtPeople There,
BUT THE PLANET IS INHABITED.
Professor Davidson Talks of Drawing a Big
Triangle on Sahara.
MARS MEJ WOULD SAT WJ7RE IDIOTS
When Prof. George Davidson, of the
Davidson Observatory and the Coast and
Geodetic Survey, was shown the Paris
cablegram saying that an old lady has died
at Spa, leaving 100,000 francs as a prize to
the astronomer, French or foreign, who
within ten years shall be able to communi
cate with any planet or star, says the San
Francisco Examiner, he read it through
slowly once, then he read it twice more
rapidly. Finally he picked it up, held It
at the proper distance from his eyes, and
squinted at it Just as he would squint at
Mercury through his telescope if he wanted
to find the big tortoise-shaped spot on its
northern hemisphere.
"An old lady an old lady!" the veteran
astronomer finally exclaimed. "Now, Isn't
that a pretty way to treat such a piece of
philanthropy as that? An old lady, In
deedl Now, why under tho sun do yon
suppose they keep back her name? I am
inclined to believe that some good-looking
young man one of these smooth talkers
has-been getting close to her and talking a
lot of astronomy into her ear. From the
very form her bequest takes I am aware
that somebody Flammarion or some other
man has been talking to her about the pro
posed triangle. The project is a very curi
ous one, but can be explained quite easily."
SBAWXNQ A TEIANGLE ON SAHAEA.
Prof. Davidson picked up a blue pencil
and drew on a white sheet of paper a right
angled triangle.
"This that I have drawn," he said, "is
the old triangle of Pythagoras. That
triangle has a right angle, and the square
built upon the side opposite the right angle
is equal to the sum of the squares built upon
the other two sides. The proposition is said
to be the fundamental one of geometry. It
has been proposed to draw such a figure as
that in the Desert of Sahara, or some other
freat plain, the lines, of course, to be hun
reds of miles long, and made so they would
be distinct on the desert sand. One way
would be to plant palm trees, so that the
forests would take the shape of lines in the
figure. Certainly the green of the palms
would be so bright in contrast with tha
white of the sand that the drawing when
completed would be plain enough.
"These are the suppositions that go along
with the Idea, It is supposed that there are
people on some of the planets, at least on
Mars. It is supposed that the people on
the planet are civilized and capable of look
ing through telescopes, and it is concluded
that if this is so, they must know the Py
thagorean proposition.
THE PEOPLE 07 MAE3 WXLX, SEE IT.
"So, if the people on Mars look through
their telescopes at the earth they will be
sure to see that enormous figure on tha
desert, and seeing it they will realize that
the earth is inhabited by men of knowledge
and that the drawing is a signaL Then, of
course, they will set to work to answer it by
building just such a figure on Mars. That
will be talking from star to star.
"But all this is bosh and nonsense to me,
and I dare say it was bosh and nonsense to
the man who wheedled this Frenchwoman
into setting aside her 100,000 francs. But
whoever he was, he knew on which side his
bread was buttered, and knew that such a
trust, for whatever purpose, would bear in
terest. "But even supposing that the Desert of
Sahara is one great plain and that it is
large enough for tha purpose, and even
supposing that it was possible to make such
an enormous figure, I am in doubt whether
the people on Man, with such telescopes as
we use, would be able to see it. At certain
times Mars is but 34,000,000 miles from tha
earth, but it gets farther and farther away,
until the distance is 61,800,000 miles. That
is a good way off to see triangles.
WOULD THINK US A BACH Off IDIOTS.
"But if Mars is inhabited I am inclined
to believe that the inhabitants are not fools.
If they saw a triangle-shaped object on the
face of the earth they would not
Jump to the chimerical conclusion
that there were idiots enough down
hera to build such an affair.
The truth is we do not know whether any
of the planets besides the earth are inhab
ited. We think we know that it might be
possible for men to live on Mercury. Tha
situation and condition of things on the
other planets are altogether different from
those on the earth. So, when we talk about
the inhabitants of the planets we enter the
realm of surmise, and Jules Verne has a
better chance than the scientist.
"The four planets nearest the sun are
Mercury, Venus, the earth and Mars. Mer
cury is only 25,392,000 miles from the sun,
which isn t very tar when you take the heat
into consideration. Consequently we be
lieve it is a good many times hotter than
Arizona on Mercury. There are other dis
advantages, such as lack of space, enormous
mountains, and no certainty of atmosphere.
Mercury is only 3,060 miles in diameter, yet
there are mountains on its surface over 12
miles high.
MAES SITUATED LIKE THE EABTH.
"Venus is 66,134,000 miles from the sun
and is plenty hot enough, although nearly
twice as far as Mercury from tne Great
Heater. Then there is some question about
the atmosphere as yet, and the year is only
224 days long. The earth comes next, being
91,430,000 miles from the sun. After this
planet is Mars, 139,311,000 miles from tha
luminary.
"All astronomers admit that If people
like those on the earth live on any of the
other planets Mars is probably the one. Tha
reason why is easy to tell. Although Mars
is farther from the sun than the earth hit
orbit is so eccentric that at certain timet
he is only 126,313,000 miles away.consequently
the temperatures are, likely, merely a little
more moderate than thoseon the earth. Then
too, the diurnal motion of tbe two planets
Is about tbe same, so that from one year's
end to another the distance from the earth
to Mars varies only 23 800,000 miles to61,SC0,
000 miles. Mars has its seasons and its polar
lcejnstlike the earth. Through thetolescope
we can watch ice fields at the poles get
larger as winter approaches and see them
get smaller again in the summer.
WHAT ONE ASTBPXOMER CAN SEE.
"Mars has an atmospbore and clouds like
those on earth. There are continents and
oceans on Mars, so that altogether tne anal
ogy between that planet and tbe earth 3
very close, tho striking difference being .
that Mars is much the smaller. Astrono
mers are more and more disposed to believo
that Mars is inhabited. Tou ask ine if wa
know, however, and I promptly tell you wa
do not.
"An astronomernamedSchiapparellt claims
he is able to see a double line of canals on
Mars. These must be enormous works if ha
can see them, and must represent a stu
pendous amount of work'on the part of an
almost countless number of people. I can
not see them through my telescope, and
many others fail. After all, these canals
may be in Schiapparclli's eye. People get
what they call astigmatism nowadays and
see two pencils where there is only one.
Perhaps that is what Sohiapparelll has.
"But even if there are people on Mars,
and even if they have built canals, as for
talking wih them," and the professor re
peated the statement to make It more posi
tive, " as for talking with them, nonsense!"
It Depends.
Chicago Tribune. 3
"No," observed the man who was crack
ing peanuts, "I nevermake any suggestions
about the cooking at my house. A man
has no business meddling in bit wife's
kitchen."
"I reckon not," replied the mild-looking
little man after a pause, absent mindedly
rubbing a bald spot just above his ear,
"unless ha does the tha cooking, van
AcaoM."
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