THE PITTSBURG- DISPATCH, WEDNESDAY, -DECEMBER " 31, 1890. e Bi&rafdj. ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, JS46. Vol.43, o.S -Entered at Pittsburg 1'ostofllce OTemLcrlJ. lsST, as second-class matter. Business Office Corner Smithfleld and Diamond Streets, News Rooms and Publishing House 75, 77 and 79 Diamond Street. EASTERN ADVEIMISINO OFFICE. KOOJl II, TRIbCM. 15U1I.UING. EW l'OKK. where complete files ol THE DIM'ATCH can always be found, rorelgn advertisers appreciate the con TentcnM. Home advertisers and friends or THE HKI'AICII. while in Jeir lork, are also made welcome. TI1E DISPATCH Is regularly on sale at Erentzno's. S Union Square. Jfew York, and 17 -ire. tie rOpe a, Fct'-is. Fiance, tchere anyone vJio Jiai been disappointed at a hotel neus stand can obtain it. terms or the dispatch. TOSTAGE TXEE H THE fMTED STATES. DAILY l)isrjTC, Onclear $8 00 DaILT DirATca, lcr Quarter - 00 Daily UisrATcii. one. Month. ... "0 JIaili Dispatch, including Sunday, l year. 10 00 Daily Dispatch, including bundaY,3in'ths ISO Duly Dispatch, including fcunday, liu'th 90 M-xdai Dispatch. One ear 550 V, elkly Dispatch, One Year 1 25 The Daily pisrATCH Is delivered by carriers at Ifcelits per week, or including fcunday edition, at Zi rents per wteiv. PITTSBURG. WEDNESDAY, DEC. SI, 1S90. THE MOST PKOSPEROCs YEAR. Standing at the last stage of the journey of 1S90 and looking back at so much of the road as has been bounded by local industries and interests, the retrospect offers many 1-ivorable aspects The propulsion of busi ness to an increase of 5135,000,000 in the city of Pittsburg alone over the figure of the previous year, leading all previous records, is significant of the activities of this prosperous region. But, more signifi cant still has been the demonstrated stabil ity of our industrial and mercantile under takings through the late period of financial stringency which was so severely felt else where. The visible growth of the city during 1S90 has been such as to require no comment. It is rather iuteiestiug to speculate in how far it will continue during the twelve months to come. That a close money market and a degree of doubt as to the future of the gas supply will give a temporary check to the execution of extensive plans, otherwise in view, is not unlikely. Hut, so long as the general business of the eountry is on a safe basis and inexhaustible coal remains in our hills as fuel ior the workshop of the conti nent, the course of Pittsburg must inevitably be progressive with no intervening back ward step. Meanwhile, the rate of progress maybe greatly accelerated by public spirit in the comniunitr. Between the city which helps itself through that concerted action of many which enables the seizure of large oppor tunities, and the city which is self-satisfied with such growth merely as results from the separate undertakings of the individuals who compose it, ttiere is a wide dilierence. In the midst ol the satisfaction which must be ielt oer the exhibit of 1890, it is still due to say that Pittsburg is yet far behind some other cities in the development of that co operative energy which has proven else where ot immense value. The coming year promises to furnish channels in which the co-operating activities of the community may be felt beneficially for a long time to come. The problem of additional traffic facilities has been forced upon this region for years back by the natural growth of its business. Whether added means are to be had through new railroads or a canal to the lake, no one doubts that they are badly needed. This seems, indeed, to be the most Tital want of the city at present. It remains to be been whether the ample means and re sources of the vast industrial interests con centrated here will be able to supply it either through the medium of local effort solely, or with the help of legislative coun tenance and substantial aid. On the whole, the departing year, 1890. will take its place as the brightest and most prosperous so far in the history of the city. The one to come, if it is to take equal rank, may, however, call for broader plans and increased energies from all who are locally interested. NEXT YEAR'S EXPENSES. Chiefs Bigelow and Elliot filed their re ports yesterday, which completes the munij cipal reports lor this year. Most interest is taken in their estimates for neit year's ex penditures. Chief Elliott will likely get his appropriation without much discussion as he asks for but little more than for this year. Chief Bigelow may meet some op position. But it is well to consider the objects for which he wants the in creased appropriation, before indulging any criticism. This city has been growing wonderfully, and Its needs are con stantly increasing. Not only are there new streets to be improved and cared for, but there is a popular demand for improve ments on the old thoroughfares, and a better condition of things generally. Part of the money is wanted for the new park, of which good citizens are proud, and nearly one third of the increase is for the purpose of getting the movement for free bridges to the Southside started. People are prone to criticise public expenditures, but if they will honestly consider the objects ia this case, the criticism will mostly melt without expression. THE INDIAN OUTBREAK. The conflict between the Indians of Big Foot's band and the United States soldiers under Major 'Whiteside which was sin gularly reported at first as a complete sur render seems to have inflamed all the dis contented Indians, including even those who had previously given injtheir adhesion. The result will probably be a long and trouble some outbreak carrying the practical cer tainty of ravages by the Indians on frontier farms and an expensive war before the sav ages are subjusated with partial if not com plete extermination. The signs that this trouble has originated in neglect, if not actual fraud in the treat ment of the Indians, are reinforced by the circumstances of this outbreak. The well known characteristics of Indian warfare prove that it could not have been intended by Big Foot's band to attack the troops when they offered to surrender. The In dians rarely attack four times their number unless with some remarkable advantage ot position, and they never burden themselves and their squaws when they intend to fight. But in this case 130 Indians after beginning to surrender to COO troops, while burdened by the presence of 250 squaws, suddenly broke out into a desperate fight. These cir cumstances, as the dispatches say, made it an act ot insanity utterly foreign to the cool calculation shown in the preconcerted acts of Indian hostility. There is hardly any room for doubt that with the memory of past hardships and neglect in their minds, they concluded while they were being disarmed that they were going to be starred or im prisoned, and that they would rather die r:iiJfcfe4i fighting than any other way. It is no less evident that the same leeling inspired the iresh revolt of the partially reconciled tribes as soon as the news of the conflict reached them. There is no doubt that the Indian is blood thirsty, savage and treacherous, and when he commences hostilities there is no course left but to crush him into subjugation. But that only makes it more crim inal when inefficient or corrupt Government agents fail to fulfil the agreements which the Government has undertaken or divert to their own profit the supplies which should be distributed .among the wards of the nation. If the hos tilities continne, every effort must be made to save the frontier from ratline and murder; but while that effort is going on the nation should remember that there is a fearful re sponsibility for those who have falsified the faith of the Government and left these sav ages without supplies enough to keep them from starvation. It may be too late to rectily the error in this case; and our long record of dishonor and bad faith in dealing with the abor igines seems likely to be preserved in what will probably be the closing outbreak of that disappearing race. But the nation should have enough moral sense to call for a reckon ing with the men whose official acts have produced the bloodshed. MONEY ON THE OTHER SIDE. Some remarks on Senator Brice's course in the last campaign, which are intended to be laudatory, made by the "Washington cor respondent of that sometime independent, but now ultra Democratic paper, the Chi cago Herald, have aroused the sarcasms of the equally ultra Republican organ, the Philadelphia Inquirer. There is decided food for sarcasm in tbevigoious attempt to exploit Senator Brice's abilities as a politi cal leader, which by the statement of his Democratic admirer, consists of purchasing political prominence by drawing immense checks for Campaign funds. There have been a good many statesmen of the same order; but the details which are given in this laudation of Senator. Brice are almost as frank and refreshing as Colonel Elliot F. Shcpard's disclosures on the other side of the house. According to this eulogy of the organic stamp, an agreement was made with regard to the last campaign by Senator Brice, Oliver Payne and ex-Secretary "Whitney, three eminent representatives of Democracy whose statesmanship lies in their hank accounts. It was to take care of Ohio, if th Congressional Committee took care of the rest of the Union." The way in which that pledge was redeemed is proudly pointed out by the Democratic journalist to have consisted of pouring money into the Ohio campaign. "I happen to know," it is averred, "that, in the McKinley, district alone, Brice found it necessary to spend $50,000. Throughout the State he must have spent as much more." The idea that trying to win political campaigns by sheer weight of money de notes the highest rank of statesmanship, is fair food for the sharpest sarcasms of the Republican press, although we could wish that the criticisms of our esteemed cotem porary, the Philadelphia Inquirer, on it were a little less manifestly of the pot-and-kettle variety. We seem to remember that during the Delamater campaign and more recently, indeed there was talk of very large campaigu fund's on the Republican side; but the Inquirer did not deem it necessary to speak unfavor ably on that feature of monetary politics. If it had attacked the idea of buying Re publican success in Pennsylvania by means of money, its attack on the same feature in Brice's campaign would have had farmoie weight But it is true that this praise of the use of money in politics from the Democratic side, proves that the Democrats who have got into leadership by means of corporation backing and superabundant millions, are tarad with exactly the same stick as the Republicans of the same order. A very satisfactory com mentary on the exact value of that sort of politics is furnished by the fact that the very State where this trio ot mill ionaire politician! poured out their money like water, was the one State where the Republicans most prominently held there own. And the district in which Senator Brice spent 550,000 to defeat McKinley a sum which carries with it the clear imputation of a willingness to buy votes the result was that Major McKinley actually reduced the normal Democratic majority of the district by some 1,500 vote. A very funny attempt to gain credit for Brice is made in the assertion that "he said a month before the election that he would send fourteen Democrats Irom his State in stead of seven and seven Republicans instead of fourteen, and he kept bis word to the letter." The fact is that it was known eight months before the election that, oa the usual party vote, there would be this change in the Ohio delegation by reason of the gerry mander. Brice's brilliant campaign ex penditures did not gain a single Congress man for the Democrats over what was awarded them by the gerrymander. The fact that corporation Democracy was supreme in Ohio prevented that State from feeling the tidal wave which overflowed the rest of the country. Millionaire statesmen are popular in their own parties because they furnish fatness for the professional politicians. As long as the organs continue to denounce the use of money by their opponents and to praise it on their own side, the public will be able to make a very correct estimate of their sin cerity. TOO MANY SUDDEN DEATHS. Several features of the Coroner's report are worthy of careful consideration. In the first place, this official reports 200 more cases than last year, an increase in far greater ratio than that of the population. His rec ommendation that the overhead wires be abolished is pertinent in this con nection, and the railroad cross ing at grade might well be included as a producer of coroner's cases. It is instruc tive to note that while there were 28 cases of homicide during the year, there were no judicial hangings, as there have not been for years. Whether this neglect has any in fluence on the number of murders or not, it would still seem proper to mete ont the ex treme penalty occasionally. What the law has not none, however, the Belf-murderers have, no less than 21 persons having com mitted suicide by hanging during the year. SUPPRESSED PATENTS. The appearance in the Eastern newspapers of intimations that a struggle is impending between the Western Union Telegraph Com pany and the Bell Telephone Company, as a result of the prospective entrance of the latter into the business of long distance telephoning, has several interesting phases. The prospect of a struggle between two gigantic corporations, each with an im inenre amount of water in its'stocks that may be squeezed out by a sharp competition is one feature. The respective merits of telegraphy and telerjhoning for the trans mission of news over long distances is an other. But as these features can be better judged, when they take definite shape, the IBBT Nfcltfi i, .L, .- . '.MIJIM. .v , .' MiMMi&JlMSA, V - . . - .,. . -..., ..'. . iymm one feature that now deserves public atten tion is the lrank statement of wflat has been an open secret foryears.that the competition between the telegraph and the long distance telephones has been postponed for years, by La contract of over ten years ago, in which the telephone patents were united and the telephone company bound itself not to enter into competition with the telegraph com pany, during the duration of the patents. Here we are confronted with an anomalous result of our patent system. The foundation of our patent laws lies in the" policy of en couraging invention, in order that the people may get the benefit of new processes or ideas stimulated by that legislation. If thenew inventions are not put into opera tion the public gets no benefit and the pur pose.of the patent is defeated. Yet here we have a case not only of the more common sort, where the consolidation of patents is formed to build up a monopoly and prevent the public irom receiving the benefit of com petition between the rival patents, but of the sort which is less well known, where the control of the patents which render long distance telephoning possible has been used to prevent long-distance telephoning from coming into operation, and thus to defeat the very purpose for which the patents are granted. It would be an instructive subject of in quiry to learn how many other cases there are in which the control of patents, of great importance and convenience, has been used to prevent the patent from coming into use. The subject is a new one and has not re ceived any especial investigation; but if it were probed, more of this practice might Je shown than the public at large has any idea of. It has been a matter which sharp ob servers have noticed, that where a new patent would by its economy or superiority depreciate a large investment of capital in older processes, the owners of that capital are likely to be the highest bidders for the new patent, simply for the purposes of sup pression. The consequence is that the ex clusive privilege granted by our patent laws is sometimes employed to prevent the new process or article reaching the public so long as the patent is in force. Of course such cases are the exceptions; but when the operation of our patent laws furnish exceptions which defeat the pur poses for which patent laws arc enacted, do not they prove the necessity of an amend ment? INSTRUCTION IN ROAD BUILDING. An interesting sign of the way in which the improvement of highways has taken hold of the public mind is furnished by the offer of Lafayette College to give to one rep. resentatire from each county in the State a course of free instruction in road building. When the road question stirs up the colleges it is certain to have forced itself upon the minds of the whole people. But before concluding that a course of free instruction in road building at Lafay ette College will put the State in a position to build roads durably, it is hardly exces sive caution to ask for some proof that La fayette College knows so much about build ing highways that it is qualified to instruct the rest of the State. Has that educational institution built any highways which have defied the erosion and up heavals of time? If not, what are its qualifications for the task it offers to undertake? The theories of road-building are at the disposal of any man who cares to invest the few dollars necessary to obtain the standard books on tha- subject. But the practical knowledge as to how durable roads can economically be built with the various kinds of materials and labor avail able in different districts, is something that requires more than the average instruction afforded in colleges or books. The most effective instruction in road building is given by the men who build, as Mr. Warner of the county workhouse did, an actual section of solid road from the ma terials close at hand and at a cost of less than a dollar per lineal foot We are pleased to observe that the New York Tribune, in connection with Mr. Roose velt's remarks about the Four Hundred, is able to assure the public that its general ideas con cerning that class are highly erroneous. It asserts that the dude of the caricatures and the ravages of Anglomania are both creations of the public Imagination. If the esteemed Tribune can add to this a statement that the reported purchase, in the marriages of New York heiresses of decayed Enropean titles is withontreal existence, wemay yet conclude that ther. is a little genuine Americanism in the ranks ot the alleged New York aristocracy, after all. Eveky report of Indians surrendering is followed by accounts ot a serious Dattle. And every time wo are assured the Indians are whipped the loss to the rogular army is larger, and the scene of the battle nearer civilization. Does this mean that the Indian war is really opened? The appearance of that report concerning the Investigation of the silver bullion syndi cate, that W. E. Curtis and Secretary Blaine may be discovered beneath the wood pile is in teresting. If untrue, It may be taken as a measure of the desire of the Secretary's ene mies in Congress and the Cabinet, to stick all possible knives into him. If true, it leaves no wonder that one o tho Secretary's friends de clares himself authorized to say that Mr. Blaine will under no circumstances accept tho nomination of 1S92. The Verestcbagin art exhibition is one of the treats which the Carnegie building in Allegheny affords to the community. It also gives us a foretaste of what Pittsbarg can en joy when Mr. Carnegie's magnificent gift to Pittsburg takes material and architectural shape. The reports about Vice President Mor ton's position on the new "previous question" rnle recall the familiar and proverbial rhyme. He will and he won't, and no less clearly he'll be d d whether be does or don't When Mr. Gould declared that Charles Francis Adams had managed the Cnlon Pacific Railroad in a way that set at defiance all the precedents of railway practice, it was supposed that he referred to Mr. Adams' pernicious prac tice of building up the value of the property without reference to stock manipulations. But a new detail has been added by an article about Mr. Adams' private car. It is discovered that Mr. Adams permitted to be prominently posted up in that vehicle the motto, "God Hates a Liar." 1 That new reaper and binder combination is going to illustrate the way in which it bene fits the people and does not restrict production by discharging several thousand employes on Jannary 1. 1 The Signal Service people have got on very well with their predictions during the re cent stormy period. With the exception of that day last week'wnen the bureau's morning pre diction was for warmer weather and in the afternoon threw out the cold wave flag, it has. correctly foreshadowed the changes of the weather. As on that day it predicted the both kinds ot weather, it was bonnd to come right. But tn that case It made a narrow shave of not getting on the right side soon enough. MORE lives have been lost by the crim inal ingenuity of some NcwYorK economist, who propped up the fiat roof of a big building while the nails wcro all cut away from it An Ohio judge holds that one railroad may not prevent another being built by occupy ing the ground with switches and side tracks. The necessary business of a railroad, he defines' as the duty it owes the public in the common carrying of freight and passencers, and he rules that another railroad may take and occupy any property not needed, for such use. This is, no doubt the real spirit of the law. but it is a truthful interpretation that will make a good many corporations squeal. London seems to be getting the fact forced in upon its densely conservative mind that it will not do to place too firm a faith in the fire apparatus ot half a century ago. IT is painful to observe in an editorial on "the mature skater's woes" In the Hew York Morning Journal an assertion that when the mature skater falls down and tries to cot ut again "he hooks the toes of his skates together and falls on his nose." This indicates that the mature skater in the longitude of New York must be an antique. In this section the mature skaters discarded that antediluvian pattern of skates which are capable ot hooking together when they were still young. Possibly when the next Mayor's mes sage is sent in.dnplicate copies for each branch of Councils may ensure its reaching both bodies. The good advices is given to the Senate by that ultra Republican organ, the New York J'ress, to "stop talking and do something" by passing such measures as the bankruptcy and copyright bills. But if tho esteemed J'ress wants our legislators to give measures for tho public welfare priority over those for par tisan advantage, it will have to advocate a new kind of politics. If the Ohio gas field is petering out, as it seems to be, even moro decisively than the Pennsylvania field, it will make it necessary for the numerous glass factories that have been located there, to move themselves within a closer reach of the cheap 'fuel supplied by Pennsylvania's coal. WELL KNOWN PEOPLE. Countess Von Waldersee, formerly an American lady, presented Minister Phelps re cently with a colored portrait if General Von Moltke. Peof. Walter Balentine. of the Maine State College, will soon visit Western colleges to study the various systems ot instruction in agriculture. The German Kaiser rises every morning at 7. He takes a cold shower bath, is shaved and shampooed, and by 7:30 is ready for breakfast with the Empress. Genebal Cassius M. Clat, who has been seriously ill for some time at his home at White Hall, Ky.. is convalescing. This Is his first sickness in 40 years. Fbof. Koch takes a horseback ride at 3 o'clock every afternoon. This is his only means of exercise, and by 4 o'clock he is back at his work in tho Hygienic Institute. M. Julius Stewart, the American artist leads a happy life abroad. He spends spring on the Riviera, his summer cruising in his yacht autumn in his chateau in Normandy and winter in Paris. Senator Sfooner is a little man with a big head. He has made a national repntation in the Senate within a comparatively short time, and don't propose to allow himself to be thrust into tho political refuse heap yet awhile. The chief gown worn by tho Austrian Em press is a straigh , black, plaited skirt with a bodice like a Swiss peasant's. Over this she wears a loose jacket, which she changes three times a day, the material varying with the tem perature. Brigadier General John Gibbon, now commanding the Division of the Pacific, and General S. V. Benct Chio . of Ordnance, will reach the age limit during the coming year. General Benet retln'. January 22 and General Gibbon April 20. Miss Ray Frank is one of the few Jewesses who in recent times have preached in a syna gogue. On the Day of Atonement she spoke at Spokane Falls, Wash, and so interested her bearers that they decided to establish a per manent congregation there. Mrs. Garfield is said to be overwhelmed .byher correspondence. Letters come to her from every part ot the country and upon every conceivable topic Every communication she receives is given careful attention, and fre quently a pleasant letter of some length is sen. in answer. Mr. Calber Marshall, R. a., has placed his resignation in the hands of the President ot the Royal Academy, and will forthwith join the ranks of the "retired," Ho is the Nestor of the Royal Academy, having been elected associate in 1S44 and full academician in 1852, 18 years before Mr. Hook, who now becomes the senior member of the academy. Prince Victor, of Hohenlohe, has com pleted the plaster cast of the life-size statue of the Princess of Wales, subscribed for by En glish ladles. When the marble statue U fin ished it will be placed in tho Royal College of Music Prince Victor is said to have succeeded in producing a striking presentment of the Princess. She is reproduced in the doctor's cap and gown belonging to her Dublin musical de gree. . IOWA FARMERS. They Oppose tho Force BUI and Ask Their Senators to Vote Against It. Des Moines, Ia., Dec 30. Tho farmers of Iowa, regardless of party lines, do not take kindly to tho force bill. Carlisle Alliance Sat urday passed a resolntion in opposition to it, and asking the United States Senators from Iowa to defeat the bill and save the nation's rights of franchise. This resolution fairly rep resents the farmers of Iowa. Erobably Do Not Expect Anything. BuHalo Express. It is announced that the New York and Lon don committees on the Virginia State debt have definitely agreed on a plan which it is ex pected the Virginia Legislature will readily approve. The inference is that the creditors won't ask a cent The Virginia Legislature is only about two-thirds as honest as the Ms hone Legislatures used to be. Extra Healthful Occupation. Philadelphia Times. "I know dual means twice, but what does a dual life mean?" "Probably that a French duelist lives twice as long as other people." Going toTJegln Over Again. Philadelphia Times. Gladstone has entered on his 82d year. In cidentally it may be noted that he lately pur chased a second-hand copy of Cobbett's "Ad vice to Yonng Men." DEATHS OP A DAY. Daniel Curran, Centenarian. rEFECIAL TELEGRAM TO THE DISPATCH. 1 Lima, Dec 30. Daniel Curran, aired 108 years, died at midnight at his home on North Jackson street this city. He retained full'possesslon of all his faculties to the last, and was the oldest person in Northwestern Ohio, If not in the entire fjtate. He leaves a brother in Bellelbntc who Is 100 years of age. He was born in Ireland, but had lived In this country 75 years, and in this city S3 years. Judge John Mitchell. Des Moines, 1a Dec. 30. Judge John Mitchell died at 1 o'clock yesterday, after a brief illness of typhoid pneumonia. He was born at Claremont N. H., February 28. 1330, and located In this city In 1850, where he. has since resided. Ho was a mcmDer of the Legislature in 1861-62, and Judge of the Circuit Court 12 years, beginning in 1869. He filled other offices with fidelity, and was greatly respected. i B. B. Brashear. 11. B. Brashear, husband of Julia, and the ven erable father of Prof. John A. Brashear, died yesterday 1 ithe 74th year ol his age. Funeral services will be held at the residence of his son, George A. Brashear. 3203 Sarah street, Southside, to-morrow evening at 8 o'clock. Burial at Brownsville, Thursday, train leaving the Union depot, this city, at 7:5o o'clock A. jr. Ex-Judge Simon Wisdcin. East Liverpool, o., Dec 30. Ex-Judge Simon Wlsdeln, one of the oldest members or the Colum biana county bar, died suddenly to-day of heart disease, at his home in New Lisbon. He was a prominent Mason, and at one time represented this district In the State Senate. Rev. J. It Walker. Adrian, Mien., Dec. 30. Kev. J. B. "Walter, Secretary of the Board of Ministerial Education of the Methodist Protestant Church, and well known throughout the denomination, Is dead. SNAP SHOTS IN SEASON. When you hear of a person dying from over work make some inquiries about his behavior during leisure hours. This is the season for looking backward. Of course, you look forward all the while. If you don't you ought Some one a long while ago said that the people who have no history are happy. Well, if this is true Pittsburg should be haopy. Nothing wonderful has been crowded into its history the past 12 months. No sorrows or sadness, no startling crimes or casualties have helped to make the year historic red paged, lurid. But all the same, It has pros pered and progressed in a deliberate, perma nent, pleasant matter-of-fact way. Fortune has smiled sweetly on .this speck on the map of a great nation. The average memory can paint the dark side of tho fading picture Of course, many have .fallen beneath the sha-p scythe swung by dis ease and time, but the harvest was not above the average. The elements have been gentle fire, flood and gale have come and gone, but neither the gaps made nor the wreckage left were unsightly nor monumental. But in the upward and onward line the city is full of memory marks fine fingerboards along the road of the vanishing year. " Tho old cronies who delight in conning over the story of tho past who figure out cycles by the world's calamities, who date a new era with a disaster, who punctuate periods with a blotch of blood or an epidemic, are surely at sea this time. They n ill have to date their memories with tho figures chiseled by willing hands on the" polished block3 occupying the place of honor on the facades reared by Commerce, from the driving of a spike in a bright strip of steel, from the razing of a landmark and the rearing of a business mart, from the disappear ance of a bare spot and the appearance of a happy cluster of homes from the Is, not from the Was, from the joys, not from the sorrows. Happy, indeed, the people who can count their woes on the fingers of ono hand and cover a broad tablet with the proceeds of prosperity. May tho coming be bright as the going year. After you marry don't forget your best Little Bat, the scout who found Big Foot's band, should be credited with a home run. Iryou are prepared for the unexpected it never happens. The Exposition gasser has sand, at all events. If you want to find a warm wave go to the Gnlf stream. Marriage means self-denial, and self-denial means happiness. In hot weather most of us aro victims of the sweating system. The Chicago plan of breaking banks by run ning into them with guns and tagging the boodle is bound to create a panic wherever tried. Take Things Easy. If tho winter winds feel raw, And it's breszr. Or if a baleful thaw Makes you sneezy. Don't worry, fuss or bustle, Don't fly around and hustle, Take it easy. If you run with all your might Breath gets wheezy. If you think that life's a fight You're uneasy. Don't sigh or borrow sorrow From the region of To-morrow, Take it easy. The opera glass is a friend of realism. We cannot marry a sister, you know, and possibly this is the reason why some Pitts burgers object to mating with Allegheny. When Ere made the first bad play she was hissed. The Standard has gobbled all the tank ships. It has got most of the earth and it is after the water now. Policemen are frequently cornered, thanks to rapid transit and business bustle. Practice on tho One. Soon he who slings a rapid pen Will frequently be caught Swearing o'er his ledger when He makes another naught The ripest fruit falls first and spoils soonest New Year's Day will be about nine and a quarter hours long, according to the astrono mers. The callers will doubtless measure it by the regulation twenty.four standard. Courtroom doors are frequently opened to admit guilt. The longest straw carries the lightest head. What will a steamship be called when it is propelled by electricity? A woman of note Patti. When there is a run on a snow bank the snow always makes a deposit Builders frequently figure on a slate roof. It is natural for tho girl who misses a dance to be hopping mad. The Weather's Fault. When the sun shines bright And caves are dripping, It's a common sight To see folk slipping. The boy with new gum boots always hunts the deepest slush. A good farm is always furrowed with care. The Indian war has at last reached the shoot ing and scalping stage. The slaying has opened with the sleighing. Grain has beards, but the honest farmers who raise them are the ones who get shaved. Talk love to your wife once in a while. It recalls old times and pleases your best friend. Before liberty is guara ateed tho laws must be rigidly enforced. The young man proposes and tho young maid or the old man disposes. When the hen accomplishes its object it makes such a f us3v about It that it is forced to lay another egg. Some people act just like the hen. If happiness conld be bartered the world would be filled with people seeking it Jealousy has sharpened more knives and pulled more triggers than honor, ana with deadlier effect When January ends you will see more day light The days will be fifty rr.inutes longer. The more you try to hide your faults the more people talk about them. THE tramp will hunt lodging but not work, Willie Winkle. A HOVEL WILL, Several Pages of a Bank Ledger Offered for Probate In the Court. v Baltimore, Dec 30. In the Orphans' Court to-day C. C. Schriver, President of tho Metro politan Savings Bank, offered for probate as the last will and testament of Rebecca Powell two pages cnt from the bank ledger containing an entrv in favor of Rebecca Pou ell, deceased, and Bishop Curtis, of Wilmington. The entry provided that in the event of the death of Rebecca Powell all her money then in the bank should go to Bishop Curtis. At the hearms to-day the attorney for the bank and counsel for Bishop Cunls contended for the probate of the will. This was opposed by connsel for the brother and sister ot Rebecca Powell. The Court refused to probate the will and granted time for the filing of a caveat Rebecca Powell was a colored woman. Punishment Fits the Crime. New York EvcuIur World. 3 Anybody who will spring spurious lymph on the market should be filled with' it till he is as loggy as the frog of Calaveras county. There are gome frauds too vile for words. IN SOCIETTS DOMAIN. A Bound or Festivities Caused byjthe Visit of the Harvard Boys Concert, Reception and Banquet Weddings and Other So ciety Affairs or Yesterday. The advent of the Harvard Glee, Banjo and Mandolin Clubs in Pittsburg caused a decided ripple among the fashionable circles and the previous organization of a Harvard Club com posed of about 20 of the most prominent gen tlemen of the city, graduates of that conserva tive university. The President of the new clnb is Mr. John H. Ricketson. and the Sec retary G. Blair Painter. These gen tlemen, with Henry Chalfant, eonstitnted a committee for the reception and entertainment of the strangers who visited the city under the most flattering auspices, and were, by Messrs. Painterand Chalfant, escorted from the depot to the Dnquesne Club House, and later in the evening to Carnegie Hall, where they gave a thoroughly enjoyable con cert. The audience was strictly a carriage assenfb lage, and while evening dress did not prevail to the exclusion of handsome street costumes, it predominated and bonnets were in almost every instance removed. The "Glees." with L. S. Thompson leader, opened the programme with "Cannibal Idyl." "Birdlmg m the Linden Tree." and "Tom, Tom tho Piper's Son." The Banjo Club under the leadership of G. L. Osgood, Jr., followed with a Scotch dance. A Glee serenade, with the solo by Mr. Williams, awakened anew the applause that had greeted the previous members and which was continued for the college songs, "Catas trophe," "Mrs. Craigm's Daughter." with Mr. Wendell for the solo part and "Mulligan's Corps Cadets." Ibe Mandolin Club closed the first part of the programme with "In Old Madrid," and scored a signal success. R. T. Whitehouse is leader of tho andoIin Clnb. Part second was com posed of popular selections hy the three clubs, and was closed with "Fair Harvard." An informal reception was given the yonng gentlemen at the conclusion of the entertain ment, by the patronesses of the affair, Mrs. J. W. Chalfant. Mrs. J. H. Ricketson. Mrs. M. W. Watson, Mrs. A. E. V. Painter, Mrs. C. L. J itzhugh, Mrs. H. K. Porter, Mrs. M. K. Moor head. Mrs. V. G. Park, Mrs. George W. Dil worth. Mrs. Wynn R. Sowell. Mrs. J. B. Oliver and Mrs. Harry Darlington. The newly formed Harvard Alumni tendered their guests a banquet at the Dnquesne Clnb, for which the spacious dining room was artist ically decorated. The banqueters numbered about 70 and the entire time between the close of the concert and the 3 o'clock train was con sumed in feasting and toasts. The strangers, oO in number, departed on the early train for Washington. D. C, where they givea concert to-night. HANDEL'S BEAUTIFUL 0EAT0EI0. The Messiah Rendered by tho Mozart Club at Old City Hall. "That wa3 never sung with more spirit nor with greater perfection," was the enthusiastic comment of a well-known music lover as the members of the Mozart Club finished the chorus "For Unto Us a Child is Born," at the concert given last evening at Old City Hall. The occasion was the rendition of Handol's masterly and inspiring oratorio, "The Messiah," by Pittsburg's successful musical organization as given at its second concert in this, its thir teenth season of uninterrupted prosperity and ever-increasing popularity under the skillful direction of Prof. James P. McCollum. The soloists were Mrs. Genevra Johnstone-Bishop, the celebrated Chicago soprano; Miss Margaret P. Frazer. whoso beautiful contralto never fails to win appreciation, Harry B. Brockett whose reputation as a tenor Is well knonnin this city and elsewhere, and John A Stronss, who is the possessor of a bass voice of remark able quality. Almost all the space in tho large hall was oc cupied by representative people of the two cities and their suDurbs, and from the liberal manner in which the applause was given each Eerformance, it may be taken by a privilege roader than inference that the, renditions of the intricate and difficult parts of Handel's great work were satisfactory and beyond the reach of criticism otherwise than technical. LITTLE MISSION W0EKEES Hold an Interesting Meeting in the Smith field Street M. E. Church. The Mission bands of the M. E. churches of the Pittsburg Conference held their annual convention yesterday in the Smitbfiel i Street M. E. Chnrch. There are in the Conference 40 societies, with a total membership of about 1,100, and they were well represented at the meeting. At the morning session, after mnsic and invocation, reports of the various Secre taries were heard. During the year the sub ordinate bands have raised tor the mission cause SI.794 25. besides sendingmany boxes con-- taimng usciul articles to lorelgn mission fields. At 12 o'clock intermission was taken for lunch eon, which was served by the yonng ladies of the Smithfleld Street Church. At the afternoon session the exercises were a continuation of the foreuoon's programme. Some time was devoted to hearing verbal re ports of the progress and condition of the different bands and societies. The rest of the time was given to music recitations and dia logues by the children of the different bands. A QUIET HOME WEDDING. Mr. James S. Henry and Miss Mary C. Rein hart Married Last Night The wedding of Miss Mary C. Reinbart and Mr. James S. Henry, the well-known newspaper correspondent occurred last evening. Ic was a home wedding, and very private, owlngto the recent death of "the groom's mother. Rev. D. Jones, of the First M. P. Church, was the officiating clergyman. The bride is the daugh ter of the well-known artist, Mr. J. McH. Rein hart, and is herself of prominent artistic ten dencies, a member of the School of Design. The young lady is tall and graceful, a bright brunette, and of winning manner. The groom is one of the brightest of tho Washington cor respondents, and deservedly popular among members of the newspaper profession. Many handsome gifts were tendered the young couple, among them a valuable one from the groom's fellow correspondents at Washine ton. Mr. and Mrs. Henry departed on the 8:30 train for the capital. Miss Maldle Slebenlck Entertains. One of the delightful sequels to the Harvard concert was the dancing party given by Miss Maidie Siebenick. with her aunt Mrs. Joseph Brown, as chaperon. It was a large and bril liant assemblage of the younger society people that graced the home of Miss Siebenick. and. amid flowers and fragrance, bright lights and delightful music, danced the hours merrily away. Refreshments of the most delightful order were a feature of the elegant little affair. A Southside Supper and Social. The members of the Young People's Society of Christian Endeavor, of the Southside Pres byterian Church, gave their annual New Year snpper and social last evening in the church parlors. The event was a pleasing success in every respect. Social Chatter. The McConnell-Wilson wodding this even ing. Mrs. C. L. McCutcbeon, of Neville street gave a euchre party last evening. The Allegheny Cotillion will dance at the Monongahela House this evening. Mrs. Samuel C. Walker, of Ridge avo nue, gives a "four o'clock" this afternoon. Mrs. Nathan McDowell, of Fifth avenue, gave a'very elegant dinner last evening. The first of the three Sewickley Assembly balls will be given to-night at Choral Hall. Miss Flora Dietrich, of the Moorhead school, was married yesterday to Mr. Kyle. Miss Gertie Hemphill, of; Sandusky street, gavo a tiddledy wink party last evening. A children's party at Mrs. James Red man's, in Crafton, will be a delightful affair to-night The Sloan-Rankin wedding at Braddoctc to. night will take a nnmber of Pittsburgers up that way. The Chalfant reception at the Dnquesne Clubhouse to-night will probably be the biggest event of the season. The second annual snpper will bo given in the Buena Vista Street M. E. Church to-night An old-fashioned Methodist watch meeting will usher the New Year in. A reception and tea party under the au spices of St. Malachi's Total Abstinence So ciety at Lafayette Hall last evening was a suc cessful and pleasant affair. The New Year's reception announced to be given, by Mrs. Judge Over, of Sewickley, is in stead to bo given by MrsChas. E. Corneliu?, of that place, in honor of her niece, Miss Mary C. Over. The Tuesday Night Euchre Club will meet this evening at the residence of Miss Elizabeth Graff, on Beatty street East End. Card play ing will be dispensed with and games suitable to New Year's Eve will be Indulged in. Miss Mary Painter, tho sweet little daughter of Mrs, Park Faintor, will he hostess to a dancing party this evening. The music will be furnished by mandolins. The young hostess is spending vacation at home from her school at Pelbani Manor, up the Hddson.- THE TOPICAL TALKER. Emulated Lot's Wife. A colored man was cleaning the snow off a sign above a store on Wood street yesterday about mid-day. It was at the second story, and the porter had only a small ledge to stand upon while he removed the snow with a long shovel. Naturally he concentrated his attention on maintaining his balance and shoveling the snow. Where the snow went or1 whom it hit was not his business. Consequently the pedes trians had some narrow escapes. Finally a lady, dressed in a costly seal dolman and crowned with a fashionable fair-weather bonnet, came along. A shovelful of snow came down as she was passing, and just grazed her nose and spattered the front of her sealskin. Instead or escaping as quickly as possible she stopped and looked up, and a nice mess of half melted snow with soot sance hit her fnll in the face, drenched her shonlders and rained her bonnet. It was unrighteous and deplorable, bnt the crowd which speedily collected laughed at the ruins. Looking Ahead. Early the other morning a newly-married man arrived home in a state of mild inebriation. His wife beheld his irregular progress uo the stairs, and was alarmed. She had no acquaint ance with such phenomena. George." she said, "wh at is the matter? You are ill, I know!" By that time he had reached the landing out side his bedroom door where his wife stood. 'Shall I send for a doctor, George?" she asked, as she took him by the arm and steadied him. "N-n-no, my d-d-dear. I don' wan' a doctor, but if," and he waved his hand, "these s-symp-toms don change may s-s-send f-for a snake charmer!" Senator Quay is in good health no matter what some people may say. A party of Pitts- burgers visited him yesterday morning at his homo in Beaver, and I have their word for it that he Is well and in good spirits. He will be In Pittsburg to-morrow night ana will go on to Washington probably on Friday morning. Among those who visited Senator Quay yes terday were Chief Brown, of the Department of Public Safety; U. S. Immigration Commissioner Layton ana Mr. Dovey, the K. of L. leader. It is tolerably certain that the general political situation was discussed, and while the exact words of Senator Quay cannot be given, it may bo stated that he thinks the Cloture and Elec tion bills will both be passed. Under Cover, So to Speak. "Mackintosh and boots are a blessing to the man of narrow means," said a victim of per petual financial stringency yesterday. "Why?" "They cover a multitude of deficiencies in one's attire," was the reply. "If they could be worn in summer a man might easily dispense with the rest of his" clothes. In the winter a man can wear the shabbiest of clothes, wind a muffler aronud his throat in lieu of collar and tie, and with a mackintosh and a pair of boots, defy the world to say that he is not well dressed. I invested in a mackintosh solely for economi cal reasons. My clothes are good enongb for office use but nothing more; they are not in shape for public exhibition. I am a victim of the prevailing' monetary tightness, and I got the mackintosh and boots to cover defects I couldn't afford to remedy." Snow and Sarcasm. Over in Allegheny the snow lies in great drifts, and the city apparently is making no at tempt to clean the streets. A prominent Pitts burg official remarked to me, as we dodged the glaciers and crevices on Federal street yester day, that Pittsburg's policy ot carting away the snow prevented such a deplorable condition of the sidewalks in the larger city. "When all the arrangements are perfected Pittsburg will not have any trouble with snow," he continued. "What do you mean?" "Simply that Mayor Gourley will not allow it to snow except in a few streets, may be when he gets the city into thorough running order." A Rational Parrot A parrot of tender years but singular discre tion has been exhibiting something very like rational powers to his owners, who are Pitts burgers. From time to time lately he has been given small bones to pick for parrots relish and need a little meat in winter time. After cleaning every scrap of meat off a bone Poll wonld make a plaything ol It,' ana so accident ally one day he dropped it into his drinking dish, which was half fnll of coffee. The liquid moistened the bone and the gristle attaching to it, and this Polly soon discovered. Now, when ever he gets a bone, bis first operation is to drop it into the coffee, and there let it soak for a time. Lately, too, he has taken to trying simi lar experiments with the pebbles which are mixed with the sand on the bottom of his cage. Apparently, he thought the pebbles would be affected like tho bones, and if a parrot can feel disgust he surely showed it in his pnzzled air, when he discovered the pebbles remained a3 hard as ever. AMERICAN CHEMISTS MEET. They Hold Their Second General Conven tion at Philadelphia. Philadelphia, Dec 30. The second cen eral meeting of the American Chemical Soci ety opened here to-day at the University of Pennsylvania. A large number of distinguished cbemi3ts from various parts ot the country were pres ent. Several interestine papers were read, among them one by H. A. Weber, of Col am bus. O., entitled "Note on Certain Reactions for Tyroxticon." COAL PEICES UNTOUCHED. The Sales Agents Meet and Resolve to Re strict Production. New York, Dec 30. The coal sales agents met tn-day, and. after a harnionious disenssion of the sitnation, decided to restrict production for the month of January to 2,500,000 tons, but prices were left unchanged. Another meeting will be held Jannary 15 to decide on the policy for the coming year. Margaret Mather's Engagement Margaret Mather and her company, including Mr. Otis Skinner, will be the attraction at the Bijou next week. On Monday and Tuesday nights she will present Mr. Young's translation of Jules Barker's French drama, "Joan ot Arc." Miss Mather essays the title role. The piece follows the old legend very closely. We have Joan as a girl in her village of Damremy, a victim of the assaults of marauders. The vision comes to her of the angels commanding her to go forth and save France, and one of the esuecially fine effects is in tho third act the taking of Orleans. The worshipers of eood music will also not forget that Gounod, the great composer, wrote the incidental numbers, of which there are many. The rest of the week the repertoire will be as follows: Wednesday matinee and Satnrdav night, "As You Like It;" Wednesday night Thursday night and Saturday matinee. "Romeo and Juliet." and "Leah" Friday. The sale of seats commences this (Wednesday) morning, as to-morrow is a holiday. All of the scenery, properties, and costumes used at the Fifth Avenue Theater in New Yoric will be used here. Where the Politicians All Agree. Washington Post There is one point on which the politicians all agree, and that is that the internal strif o is all confined to the other f arty. THE OLD YEAR DIES. The dying old year pallid lies Upon a bier heaped thick and high With faded roses and their thorns. And some weep as they watch him die. And these are they to whom be gave Nights of sweet rest and happy morns. And, though they withered in their time. The roses with the fewest thorns. They wep in 1 ear his reign once o'er Such lovely flowers they'll find more. And some there are who see him die With tearless eyes lodging to hear The joyful bells uud merry shouts That hill the hapD young New iear. And these are those who mong his gifts But little Joy unshaded found. To whom he never threw a rose 'that sharoest thorns did not surround. They wait In hope his reign once o'er Such bitter thorns they'll find no more. And some with sight Just dimmed, and llpf That show the coming of a smile, Look on him with regretful gaze 1 heir bearts untouched by grief the while, Aud these arc they who or dark clouds Aud sunshine haTe had cqunl share, W'ho for each care a gladness found. And with each thorn a rose most lair. They are content his reign once o'er, Ofblm who comes to ask no more. Margaret Etyngt CUEI0DS C0HDESSAT10KS. ' There are about 32,000 arrests each year in Paris, and of those arrests 35 are assassins. Mr. Sudden is a photographer at Jeffer son City, Mo., who makes a specialty of instan taneous pictures. The cultivation of oysters along New Hampshire's short coast line is about to he at tempted by tho Stato Fish Commission.- , A Zanesville yonng man has perfected an electric motor which, when started and the circuit shut off, will go till it wears out. It is reported that Edison is now at work nPn a patent appliance which will make the hello" girl in the telephone office a useless luxury. The snow in Cincinnati had the effect of burning out the motors of the cars on all the double trolley electric roads. The single trolley system is not affected. The Van Eensselaer's family dining table, at which Washington, Lafayette and other dignitaries have dined, is owned in Akron by descendants of the Rensselaers. A social innovation in New York City is the "blue-ribbon invitation" to dinners, indi cating (by a knot of bine ribbon in the lower lef t-nand comer) that wine will not be served. Dr. Bang, of Copenhagen, considers it probable that a large proportion of tubercular (scrofulous) affections of the cervical glands in children owe their infection to tuberculous milk. The class yell of the young'ladies of the freshman class of Colby University 13 stated to be as follows: "Co-ordination ha, ha, ha, tes saras kai enenekonta dux f emina lacta. rah. rah, rah." Ernest Meyer, a defaulting bookkeeper of Cincinnati, having escaped from a consta ble, had the impudence to telephone that fact to the authorities, after which he left for parts unknown. The Pope has ordered the enlargement of the reading rooms and other improvements in the Vatican. The new Leonine Library will JS0?! ready, and in it will be placed about 300,000 books. The sale of fancy garters for New Year presents is reported to be heavy in the North ern and Eastern States. West and South not heard from, but the fad is likely to spread all over the Republic. The most expensive Legislature iu the world 13 that of France. It costs annually S-SJ3-600--000- The Spanish Parliament costs 0.000: the Italian, 30,000; the Belgian, 5200, 000; the Portuguese, 8150,000. A ring which General H. J. Hunt lost near Fairfax station, Va., during the war was recently found imbedded In the hoof of a cow owned by a dairy farmer m that locality, and was returned to the owner in Washington. A beggar's journal has been started in Paris and meets with success. The cost of a nnmber is 2 cents, and it contains articles on the best methods of pursuing the business and advertisements of use to those soliciting chanty. A Cincinnati man has been entertain ing himself by connecting a wire to the tele phone wire and listening to what passed over the wire. Friday nieht he got bis line too close to the light wire, the result was a shock. He is no longer curious. James Dick, of Canton, wa3 run down by an engine; he laid flat on the track and as the engine backed over him he grasped the ec centric rod. The engine was stopped and he was taken out none the worse, save that his black hair bad turned perfectly white. Lake View, lit, a new village on Schoodic Lake, on the line of the Canadian Pacific, is one of the places that knows how to appreciate a railroad. June 1, I8S0, it was a wilderness: now it has a spool factory nearly finished, a hotel, store and postoffice and sev eral pretty cottages. A "wild man of the woods" has been discovered in the district near Rouen known as Petit Quevilly. This person lives in the forest by preference, and enjoys frosty weather, al though he is in rag3. He receives a pittance from his mother, which enables him to buy bread, meat and tobacco. Certain New York firms have been try ing good-looking women as bill collectors. So far the scneme has been unsuccessful. Three of the women married inside a week, and four more are engaged, while the balance sympa thize with the poor fellows who have run into debt, and have not collected a cent In speaking of the minute parasites which are f onnd in the hairy part of a tiger's foor, a scientist says: "They constitute ono of the roost wonderful curiosities I know of in tha animal world. The parasites aro so small as to be almost invisible to the naked eye, and ye: each is a perfect counterpart of the tiger." A large prairie wolf, said to have es caped from a circus a year ago. was shot by John McConnell, of Montgomery, N. Y., one night recently while it was making a meal of one of his fowls. One morning previous to this Mr. McConnell discovered the carcasses of 31 fowls, some of which had been partly eaten. Maine not only sends Europe some of its best apples bnt is now exporting the perfume of the rose. In the cargo of the steamer Parisian that sailed on Friday are nine large cases of '-wild rose pot poum" made by a Portland firm, largely of Maine wild roses. Tbe perf nme is sold in England, Spam, Portu gal and Australia. Michael Woods, 35 years old, of Palmer, Mass., eloped the other day with a 15-year-old girl, and they were married. Tbe girl's parents swore ont a warrant against Woods for abduc tion, and the detective found him in bed smok ing a pipe while his bride was working in a mill for 71 cents a day. His romance was ronnded out by a sentence of eight months in the house of correction. The greater part of the original forest in Maine has been cut over, but people well ac quainted with the snbject say there is as much land in trees or in clearings left to grow np to woods as atany time since the State was settled. A Dayton farmer is also qnoted as saying that tho logs which are cut in York county this winter are better and bigger than those cut 23 years ago, and that there is in tbe county more acres ot woodland now, mostly small growth, than there was 30 yews ago. It is announced that the New York Can cer Hospital, at Eighth avenue and One Hun dred and Sixth street, will soon receive an ad ditional sum amounting to $40,000 from the es tate of its founder. Mrs. George W. CuIIum. Mrs. CuIIum was active in the organization of the hospital about seven years ago. By her will she left to it her Rincon Hill property in San Francisco, and some land west of Central Park, near tbe hospital building. The entire bequest will amount to about $175,000. The money previously received has been used to assist in the erection of bcildings and the pur chase of their sites. There are 184 town3 in Maine that re port no abandoned farms and 313 which have one or more apiece. The total nnmber of such farms is given as 3,318 or an average of about 6 per town. The average nnmber per town ia largest in Oxford and Franklin counties, where it is 15 and U respectively, and smallest in Aroostook and Hancock, in each of whicb it is 2. The average in Androscogctn is 8. Tbe total acreage of these farms is 251,513 or 67 7-10 acra per farm, and they are valued for taxation at 81.268,769. an average of $1 99 per acre. Tbo largest acreaee is in Oxford county 11,420, Somerset coming next with 31,219, Androscog gin's proportion being 8,033. OUR STATE WITS. When reliting a joke, though he he full ot mirth, i The relator should try to retain It; For. no matter bow good. It deprives it of worth IT the narrator has to explain It. -Oil City Btiizariti A household journal says: "The tooth some mince pie has quite a pedigree." We Knew there was something In it mighty hard to digest but never once suspected it was a pedigree. XorrUlown JJerald. Jay Gould says "the big head is a terrible disease." But as long as a man can get his hat on without a shoe horn carrying several trunk lines in the crown of It at that be needn't worry about doctors. Scranton Republican. If the Indians are now dancing they are doubtless doing so to keep themselves warm. Chambersbxtra Repository. "It's absurd to talk of the McKinley, bill raislngtbe prices of dress goods." "Wed, itdocs!" j-; "Not at all. I notice that ladies' evening dresses at least are as low as ever." PMlattetpMa Times. 1 One of the geologists who are to meet to- ; day In Washington Is to read a paper on "Fossil Plants," and some persons will expect him to In clude a few remarks aboav a famous unmotorabla motor. FtiiladetpMa Ledger. A Chinaman who died recently at Port land. Ore., left an estate valued at 13)0,000. This (act will serve to dissipate the popular fallacy that boiled shirts ara unpopular In that rcxiou. I rnilactclpMa Frist. The servant girl in New. York who thought she could soar tried It- She dldi't" J0f a , .1 -DhtlnAMlnMn rait. ' - UBh OUO 13 OV4V. ,.M.q.,.- wwa 2 i