(, THE PITTSBURG- DISPATCH, TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 16, 1890. J ty B$pMj. ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8. IMS. Vol. 45, Ho. SI. Fjitcrw? at Pittsburg l'ostofflee, JfoTember H, IsbT, as second-class matter. Business Office Comer Smithfleld and Diamond Streets. News Eooms and Publishing House 75, 77 and 70 Diamond Street EASTERN ADVERTISING OFFICE, KOOMa. tiubu;e building, sew yokk. -where complete files of THE DISl'ATCn can always be iound. Foreign aavertlscrs appreciate tbe con venience. Home advertisers and friends or THE DISPATCH, -while in Xew York, are also made v elcomc THE DISPATCH is regular;; en sale a Erentano's, 5 Union Square, Sew York, and JTAre. de V Opera, Paris. France, where any. one who hat been disappointed at a hotel news stand can obtain it. TERMS OF TIIE DISPATCH. IVlfTAGE FKEE IN THE UKITED STATES. DAILY DISPATCH, One Year. f SCO Daily DisrATcn, 1'cr Quarter 2 00 Daily DisrATCU, Oncilouth - 70 DAILY DisrATCU, Inclndlngbunday, lvesr. JCCO Daily DisrATCU, lnclndinpbunday.Sm'ths. ISO Daily DisrATCU, lncludlngSunday.liuonth SO fcUfcDAY DisrATCU. One Year 150 Weekly Dispatch, One Year 125 a he Daily DisrATCU Is delivered by carriers at J.'centi per weci. or Including Sunday edition, rtSPcent per week. PITTSBURG. TUESDAY. SEPr. 1C. 1S90. FOR ANOTHER GRAND JURY". The re-opening of the bribery cases in Beaver county was inevitable. The accused, unless they were guilty, could hardly have been content -with such a very thin coat of whitewash as the grand jury cave them. Judge HcMichael will have the approval of all honorable men in ordering the presentment of the indictments against Attorney "Wallace and the three men he is alleged to have bought to the nest grand jury. In view of the prima facie case made out against the men implicated in the dis graceful proceedings at the congressional convention, Judge McMicbaels had no choice but to order as he did. The grand jury at the December term may be relied upon to investigate the wnole business thoroughly. It is unfortunate that the judicial inquiry cannot now take place till after the election. TOO MUCH OF ONE KIND. The convention of Kansas Republicans, in favor of resubmitting prohibition to a popular vote, declared: "We believe that too much legislation is a curse." They would have hit the mark more clearly in the center by adding: That too much legisla tion that is not enforced is the curie of this country. The deliverance, of course, was intended to bear upon the prohibitory law. There is reason to suspect that if the Kansas prohib itory law were not enforced, the resubmis sionists would not be bothering about it. But it is nevertheless the fact that the vice of this nation in its efforts to reform corrupt abuses, is the disposition to pass all sorts of laws, and to leave them on the statute boots dead letters. This should be amended, not only for the sake of giving good laws their full effect, but also for the safeguard against the enact ment of bad laws. Enforcement is the su preme test of legislation. If a law is not good, its enforcement will exhibit the fact and be the promptest method of bringing its repeal. Beyond that, a little experience of having to repeal harmful laws would be the surest safeguard against similar legisla tion in the future. On the other hand, the stupidity of pass ing needed laws and letting them lapse into a dead letter is so obvious that it should not require argument to stop it. Yet it is one of the public evils of the day. Wherever law conflicts with some mighty interest, either in finance or politics, it is found that influence enough can be brought to have it left ou the shelf unused, while the evils it was intended to remedy go on unchecked. TUE PROBLESI OF IRRIGATION. Irrisation as a means for creating fertility for the arid lands of the West is very gen erally appreciated; although the majority of people Lave not a full comprehension of the vastness of the territory which can be thus couveited from a desert to a fertile country. But what is still more unlikely to be per ceived is the vastness of the economic issues involved in this method. When we perceive that territory the size of several States will depend on the irriga tion ditches for crops, it is not hard to see that those who control the water supply will hold command ot the situation more coni--pletfly than the railroads do the means of getting the farmers' products to market. If a railroad should attempt to shut off an agricultural community from market, the farmers can at least subsist on their crops until relief comes. But those who control the irrigation of arid lands can if it should come to a trial of strength wipe out the farms and crops altogether by withholding the water urion any colorable pretext. It is a perception of this terrible power that has in spired the movement to have the Government undertake the work of irrigation. But that measure of State socialism has the objection common to all propositions lor Government railways and Government industries. It would transfer the power from the corpora tions to the politicians. Instead of creating a financial oligarchy it would set up a polit ical one. The power which a managing politician could exert through the control of the irrigation supply, to make farmers dependent on it vote as be dictates, need not be described. Tt is enough to say that it -Mould be more absolute and far less intelli gent than any rule of the corporation. It is true, as generally recognized, that corporations can conduct such enterprises more economically than the Government, and that capital will be ready to take hold of the work as soon as it is shown to be profit able. But in permitting corporate capital to assume that function, we should see by our experience of the railway system how easy it will be to repeat the abuses of that system. Indeed it will be possible to reproduce, in slightly altered forms, all the evils which legislation has been struggling with in the present corporate system. Suppose at the start that it takes $1,000,000 in irrigation works to make 250,000 acres of land worth $10 an acre. Then the charges necessary to remunerate the capital engaged in irrigation will take two-fifths ot the productive value of the land. But if the officers of the corporation should contract with themselves to build the dams and dig the ditches for 52,000,000 it would take two thirds of the remaining value of the land to pay the charges on the fictitious capital. Thus at the very outset, the problem of water in the capital, as well as water in the ditches, comes up. The ease with which the abuse of discrimination could be beought into existence if not completely guarded against, should also be borne in mind, the ability to give water to the friends of the corporation at one rate and to the disfavored public at another, or the more common and far-reaching abuse of favoring V the largest customers, could, more promptly than the railroad evils, wipe out the small farmers and concentrate wealth in the hands of a favored few. The abundance of pre texts on which a water supply could be withheld from those not in favor with the management, or diverted to others whose interests were allied with those in power, make it elear that the enterprise is one that cannot be placed in any hands without complete safeguards against the evils of stock watering, discrimination, or partiality in any shape. FITT5B URU'S PI, ACE IN TIIE CENSUS The arguments of the Hew York papers nrging a recount of that city, should have interest for Pittsburg as furnishing a criti cism by which to judge of our claim that the census does not give us the full popu lation to which we are entitled. The Xew York papers rely on their vital statistics in connection with the school enumeration and the vote, to prove that the census is inadequate. The argument has a good deal of force. By itself any single one of these statistical indications wonld have less authority than the census. But when they all unite iu giving concurrent testimony of an increase greater than that shown by the census, the proof is strong- that the cen sus has not included the full population. The same loeic applies to Pittsburg. The vote in elections of similar importance close to 1880 and 1890; the enumeration of school children; the number of names in the directory at each period, together with other and perhaps minor standards, are in dicative of the increase of population. Xeitber of them would alone be ground for disputing the census. But if they should all unite in showing an increase of say 75 per cent between 1880 and 1890 it would afford a fair presumption that the increase of 60 per cent given us by the census does not tell the whole storv. The matter is worthy the attention of citi zens. Pittsburg has in the past been rated below her true importance, simply because her citizens hare not taken the trouble to claim her proper position. An illustration of the effect of that policy is furnished by the cartoon in last week's Puck, which rep resents the agents and boomers of various cities, loudly calling attention to the mag nitude of their communities, while New York is asleep in a chair. The position of Pittsburg in this illustration of the enter prise of various cities is correctly described by a slang phrase. She "is not in it." Cities of a tbird our population aud a quarter our industrial magnitude are there; but Pittsburg, perhaps by the oversight of the artist, and perhaps by the conservatism of her people, does not appear in the picture, either asleep or awake. It is time for Pittsburgers to make up their minds that they will claim for their city the full credit of its population and in dustrial importance. Personally we may be bound by the limitations of modesty; but with regard to the standing of our city, modesty is not a requisite. As one of the first steps toward securing Pittsburg the position she is entitled to, we should decide that if there is any reason to believe that we have a population of 275,000 we will not rest satisfied to be credited with only 240,000. THE LAW ON STRIKES. The latest developmcut in the Beaver Falls Saw Works strike is somewhat start ling. Judge Wickham granted yesterday, at the request of the saw company, a tem porary injunction against a hundred or more of the strikers restraining them from interfering with the non-union men em ployed at the works. The in junction was granted upon the strength of affidavits presented by the saw company's officers, describing sundry acts of violence and coercion perpetrated by the strikers and their sympathizers upon the workmen hired to take the strikers' places. The suit will be watched with great inter as it is evident that a point at issue very often in the conflicts of capital and labor is to be decided. The violent interference of strikers with so-called "scabs" has been de clared illegal, but a broader injunction is here sought to be obtained. AN 13IPORTANT VISIT. The visit of the British Iron and Steel Institute to this city next month will appeal :o the local pride of all our manufacturers. Every sentiment of hospitality and interest will insure that Pittsburg shall present her industries in their best form. The visitors are the great rivals of Pitts burg in the iron and steel market. But the rivalry is one which permits the warmest friendship and the heartiest personal rela tions, beyond that the visitors trill com prise the greatest authorities on iron and steel in the world. That makes the occasion the best opportunity for extending the fame ot our industries. If our resources, our products or our methods impress the mem bers of the institute favorably that impression will extend to the capital and enterprise embarked in similar industries tbe world over. There are possibilities of expanding our industries and increasing the population of Western Pennsylvania. Under the proof lately brought out of our large reserves of natural gas there is no reason why such a visit should not be utilized to revive the movement of European industries to this point, which was checked by the belief that the supply of natural gas is limited. If we can show ample reserves of fuel and eligible manufacturing sites, the visit may bear the fruit of a cluster of new manufacturing su burbs like Wilmerding, Jeannette and Charleroi. THE FIRST OF THE SEASON. The fall season in pictures opens at Gillespie's beautiful little gallery this week, with a bright and pleasing collection of paintings, exhibited by Mr. Collins of New York. Mr. Collins is well known here, having already brought some of the best pictures which hang ou Pittsburg walls. There are famous specimens by Corot, Delacroix, Troyon and Detaille in his present exhibit; also a couple of beautiful heads by Plot. The season is yet early for art sales, as the best local buyers and judges of pictures are for the most part not yet home from their vacation; but later in the week they will be arriving, and Mr. Collins cannot fail to do well. The declaration of the House that it will not take the trouble to discuss the Senate amendments seriatim, but will disagree tq, them all, no matter what they are, is sweeping; but it is the quickest way of getting down to the real business of settling what the bill shall be, in conference committee. Novel iniormation about the new tariff bill continues to come in from all parts ot the country. IThe Alia California has learned that "tbe iron and steel indnstry of New En gland is destroyed by a tariff increase of Si 75 a ton on foundry iron: f orze Iron, $3 60 per ton: scrap iron, 1 54 per ton; Bessemer iron, 85 50 per ton. If the csteemea Alta can designate tbe sections in which these increases of tbo tariff are made, Jt will demonstrate Itself to ba in possession of exclusive and Important infor mation. Had Mr. Ingalls deemed it advisable to go into State Issues he wquld doubtless have expressed his conviction that the purification ot Pennsylvania politics is an irridessent dream. A correspondent excuses the very slim Democratic vote against Congressman Boutellein Maine by saying that bis opponent was sick and not able to make a vigorous can vats, judging by the absence of Democratic voters from tho polls, sickness anions the Maine Democrats must have been epidemic on the day of the election. It certainly was the day atter. t That frost did not come to time. In view ot the lovely weathor of the past two days, the Signal Service can rely on the public pardon for its las: slip. It appears to be a fact that Prince George of Wales got into the Montreal lock-up; but when we are asked to swallow tbo rest ot tbo story about the way in which the scion ot roy alty knocked out five roughs and put a sixth to flight, with only one assistant, we are obliged to giro more admiration to the loyal imagina tion of the reporter than to the prowess of the Prince. The Grant monument design is on paper. It pleases tbe people of New York so much that they are still undecided whether they will not keep it there. The means of influencing Congressional nominations in the Lawrence district excited no surprise on the part of the Lawrence Qrand Jury. What astonished tho jury was that any. one had the hardihood to prosecute in a case of acknowledged bribery; and for this auda cious presnmption Doctor McKlnney was socked with the costs. PEOPLE IN GEHESAL. Bishop Beckwith, of the Episcopal Church in Georgia, is out in Minnesota hunting prairie chickens. Mr. Bangs, one of ex-President Cleveland's law partners, says there is no truth in the re port of tbe latter's intended removal to Massa chusetts. R. 1). Bltjmesfield, late editor of the New York Evening Telegram, sailed for England Saturday to take charge of the London edition of the Now York Herald. The Lord Mayor ot London receives an al lowance of $50,000 a year, but as his annual re ception alone costs him $25,000 ho complains tnat he is one of the poorest men in tbe town. Major Jed Hotchkiss, of Staunton, has accepted the invitation to deliver an address before the Virginia Press Association, which convenes in Richmond in October. His sub ject will be "Virginia's Industrial Future." William Lowehy, who died at Williams burg, N. Y last week at tbe age of 81, was en gineer of tbe first steam ferry boat built by old Commodore Vanderbilt He afterwards en tered tbe service of tbe Collins Steamship Lino. Chabt.es W. BncnnoLZ, engineer of bridges for tbe New York, Lake Erie and Western Railroad, denies tbe story that tbe famous Kinzua viaduct on that road is to be aban doned. He says tbo structure is as safe and strong as 90 per cent of the railroad bridges now in use. Bishop John J. Kain, of the Roman Catho lic diocese, of Wheeling, W. Va has returned from his visit to Europe. When he was at Brindisl a little girl refused to believe that he was a bishop because he had legs. Ho was not clothed in bis cassock, and she bad never seen a priest otherwise clad. HOW DAVID FIGUEES IT. What Mr. Kirk Says (be Standard Took From Producers In Ope Month, To the Editor of The Dispatch: Since talking to your reporte: the September report of production and consumption has come to hand. This shows tho same state of affairs. Barrels. Tho world needed and took rrom us In tbo month of August 2.642.783 Weprodncedonly 2.0H.C02 Consumption over production. 127,791 For tbe same amount of oil tha Standard and Joe Craig in Novem ber last pairl producer $3,313,425 40 The Standard now, with Joe gone pays .' 2,431.090 40 Difference $ 878,735 00 While she buys at this reduced price she charges the world the same for the product. Thus she steals from the producers in one month SS78.735. DAVID KlEK. Fittsbukg. September 15. Iron nnd Steel Institute. To the Editor ot The Dispatch: I have been informed that there would be held in yonr city some time in October a con vention or mcoting of parties interested in tbe iron and steel industry. Can you give me. through The Dispatch, further information of tbe affair? B. Denver, September 1Z The American Institute of Mining Engi neers some months ago extended an invitation to the Iron and Steel Institute of Great Britain to hold its annual sessions simultaneously with their own on this side and tbe sessions open in Chlckenng Hall, New York, on the 29th of this month, and the members of the British insti tute will give their annual meetings on the 1st of October. The first joint international ses sion of both bodies will be held in Carnegie Hall, in Alleeheny, on Friday, October 10. The visitors will be here four days. Cnn fet the Miles. From the Philadelphia ltecord.l Speaker Reed has vindicated bis right to wear a sash or surcingle as he shall please, to ornament his feet with russet shoes, and eke to paint his face vermilion if his fancy runs that way. He is a big Injun from Passama quoddy. Cnnnnn'n Modo nf Fighting. From the Kew York World.) A thick-and-tbln Republican organ at tho West says that Congressman Cannon "fought the Democrats with fire." For fire road filth. It will then not appear strange that "ho put them to flight" PENNSYLVANIA POLITICS. Erie Dispatch (Rep.): One of the leading issues ot the Stato campaign in Pennsylvania is tho equalization of taxation, with a view of re lieving real cstMa from the unjust burdens which it now carries. Tho Republican plat form is frank and outspoken upon this point, and if elected Governor Mr. Delamater will do everything in his power to assist in a proper ad justment of local taxation. Hakrisbukq Patriot (Dem.): If nine Dem ocrats can be found in the State who will not vote for Fattisou they should immediately get together and form a baseDall club. As a curi osity, they would be an immense drawing card. Bradford Star (Rep.) : It is said that Dick Quay Is very much lite his father, Matthew S., and that it is very likely that the mantle of hi; father will fall upon him. We trust that this does not mean that tho father will bequeath to tbe son his seat in the Senate, after tbe Cam eron plan, unless tbo result is prodnctlve of more visible benefit to the Stato and the party. Bradford Era (Ind.): Onr Republican friends around Pittsburg and in some of tho eastern portions ot tbe State are working for Pattison with an enthusiasm that should en courage every Democrat to put forth his best efforts in behalf of the ticket everywhere and all tbe time. If the Democracy is ever to win again in this State, the coming election must be the accepted season. Philadelphia Press (Rep.): There Is noth ing in the present situation to give the Repub lican party any concern. With a majority ot 80,000 to Bhowlor its campaign of 1S33, and 00, 000 for that of last year, it is ridiculous for tbe wildest dreamer to assume that it can bo beaten now. It will move forward, entirely confident of keeping Pennsylvania in line witb its recent great majorities. The Usee Problem Indefinitely Postponed. Prom the Detroit Free Press. The race problem was on the way to a solu tion in Reading, Pa., when an untoward event checked its progress. A young white girl of that placo was lielovcd of two gentlemen of color, and would undoubtedly have married one of them as soon as bo could havo gotten a divorce from his wife. Unfortunately a fierce quarrel broke out between tbo two rivals, and In the conflict one of them was slain. As tbe other one goes to prison tbo girl is disconsolate. ana tbe settlement oi tno race oirucMty is in definitely postponed. OUR SHORT STORIES. WAS BENEVOLENT. Tn ahswkr to a vigorous ring at tbo bell, a woman went to the door, and addressing a man who stood on the steps, asked: "Do you wish to see anyonet" "Yes. Does Dr. Bonesett live here?" "Yes, but ho is not at home." 'When will be be in?" "I can't tell: he's is Europe now." "Well. I ewed him to and told him that I wonld bring it round to-day." "You may leave it with we and I will give it to blm when he returns." 'No, I won't do that. I can't flirt with a man that hasn't enough earnestness to stay at borne and attend to bis business. I told him posi tively that I sbonld ba here to-day. Now you see what be has lost by his loose way of doing business. By the way, would you mind giving me a littlo something to eat? I have traveled quite a distance to keep my appointment and am somewhat hungry." "Don't you think you had better take the 5 that you were going to give the doctor and buy : something to eatt" "Madam, would yon counsel me to be an em bezzler? I owe this money to the doctoa and no power, not even that of hunger, can force me to squander it, I supposed at first that you were a Chnstlau woman but we will let that pass. If you havo nothing to eat handy, madam, would you mind letting me have a quarter?'' "No, I'm not engaged in charitable work." "Ob, you are not. Well, you are one of tho ladies I am looking for. Tho truth is, a cry has gone up that tbe women of this city are not charitable, and the newspapers are trying to find out the names ot those who have so de clared themselves. I do not need a quarter. I do not owe tbe doctor a cent, but have come here as a reporter. The twenty-five cent pieces which I may collect aro to bo placed in the hands of a benevolent committee. 1 do not care to ask any further questions concerning yourself. Any additional facts I may wish to know with regard to you I can learn from tho woman next door. Good day." "Hold on," said the woman. "I am not op posed to charitable work, aud tho newspapers need not say so. Here is a quarter." "I thank you, madam, and I -will see that your name does not appear on tbe black list." HOW IT IMPRESSED THEM. 'They stood on the American shore and gazed in wonder-struck silence at tbe majesty and beauty of Niagara, Tbe personification of feminine grace and tenderness, she loaned confidingly on the arm of her husband her ideal of manly strength and chivalry. The glowing sunbeams danced in tbe spray that rose like fairy mountains before their eyes, radiant .with tbe gorgeous hues of the rain bow, and tbe falling waters sounded their eternal monotone in tbe ears of the listeners, whose bearts btat responsive to its deep pulsations. Nature's own voice spoke to them and stirred the profoundest depths of their Delng. The young husband pressed the little hand that lay confidingly on his arm, and smiled on tbe sweet face upturned to his. "Gwendolen," he said, the rapture of his emotions thrilling bis voice and shining out through his dark eyes, "does it stack up to your expectations?" "Launcelot," and her eyes! seemed about to overflow with excess of pent-up feeling "it's just the cutest thing I ever struck!" WASN'T QUITE READY. T)urixo a revival in one of the Southern States, the minister noticing that a young fellow named Hank Boyd bad begun to sink down under apparent conviction, approached, him and asked, "How do you feel?" "Oh, middlin'." "Don't you feel that your Ufa has been sin ful, and that it is time to tnrn from the certain destruction that awaits yout" "Yas. middlin'." "Well, won't you come up now aud kneel down at tbe altar?'' "No, don't believe I will right now." "Bat now is the accepted time. How much danger do you suppose your soul is in this very mlnnto?" "Middlin danger, I reckon." "Come with me," the preacher urged, taking hold of his arm. ""No. not right now. I'll see yon after a while." "Do not let anything stand between you and the cross, my dear boy." "Won't ef I kin hep it." "Well, then, come along with me.' "No, not right now." "Don't you know that it is dangerous to wait?" "Yes, reckon that's middlin' lot of danger iu it." "Thon, for heaven's sake, come." "No, I kain't till I do one thing. I've got to whnp Abe Bender befo' I kero to profess re ligion. After that's done I'll be on tho Lord's side." "Ob, you must not think of whipping him." "Kain't ho'p it when ho has done me so mean." "What did ho do?" "Wall, I war away f rum borne tuther day off on tbe county road ten mile from a house, an' I wanted a chaw terbacker wus'n a houn' pup ever wanted a hunko' liver, an' I war pow erful nigh dead an' war a slobberln' like a boss catln' white clover. Just then 1 met Abe. I axed blm fur a chaw, an' ho grinned at me, a showin' a mouthful of long green, but 'lowed he wouldn't give me none. I war too weak to whup him then, but I'm pearter now, an' I think I kin fetch him: an after I have tried, w'y, I'll come Into yo' flock." "My son," said the preacher, a? he bit off a chew of long green, "I don't blame you, ana moro than that, I'll help you whale him." BOUND NOT TO GET LEFT. J-Je bad come from the West to see Boston. One evening a moment or two after leaving his lodgings be was seen to tako a knife from his pocket, cut a deep gash in a tree, and walk on. He repeated this at intervals along tbo street. Cautions as bo seemed to think himself, his mutilations bad not escaped "he notice of sev eral citizens who felt a sort ot "woodman spare that tree" veneration for tho tall maples. "Say, mister," said a burly citizen, approach ing tbe stranger, "don't you think you had bet ter let them trees alone? Too early lor sap, you know." "I don't care for sap," was tbe reply. "Then what in the deuce aro you driving at with that toad-sticker?" "Well, what do yer suppose? Here I've been in this ere town three days and haven't been able to find my way home once. I walked around tbo Common three times last night, and then Ihadter hire a cab. Why don't you straighten your streets? But I don't mean to get left to-night; I'll know this street when I Strike it. I'll feel my way by those nicks m the trees." An bumble apology for tbe streets on the part of the Bostonians followed. Finally a map of Boston was presented to tho stranger on condi tion that he would spare'tho trees. NOTHIN' TER DO. Why are the depot platforms crowded down in this country?" asked a passenger of a Memphis conductor on a southbound train that was soeedinir along through the Ozark rozion of lower Missouri. "Ob. I don't know," responded the official, "but the poople always turn out down here in good shape every time tbe train goes by." At a little place a 'few miles north of the Ar kansas line the curious passenger got off and addressed several of tliccliatives. "What brings all these people down to the Station?" he asked. . "Tain't nothin'." was the response. "Jest same as this every day. People ain't got nothin' ter do down hyar 'cept hanl in er little cotton an' watch th' keets go by." "Bnt why do they put on their best clothes and come down to tbe depot?" "Notbin ter do, I told you." "But how do they find the time to getaway?" "From what?" "Why, their business, of course." "Lawd, man, how many more times'H I tell yer that thar ain't nothin' ter do down hyar," Tbe train moved on through thJa modern Utopia, leaving tho people standing on tho platf oim with "nothin' ter do" but watch the disappearing cars ana wait for the upbound passenger. Irish Americans. From the Philadelphia Record. 1 The Democratic party is much indebted to Ireland for some of its most redoubtable and accomplished champions.. The Democratic nominee for Governor of Minnesota, Thomas Wilsdn, was born in Ireland in 1S27, He is a man of great ability and of deserved dodu j larity. - SHAKESPEARESJILL REIGNS. Tvrelfih Jflgbt Admirably Played Mberln Revived Ona ol the Finest Vnrlety Phowsln I'lontv. Tbe charm of such a performance as that which graced the Grand Opera Honsa stage last niebt can hardly be properly described. In comparison with the usual production of Shakespeare by traveling combinations it is as a well-cat diamond to a glass chip with a baoklng of tin foil, or as a peaoh with the bloom upon it besldo, a counterfeit presentment in worsted or wax. "Twelfth Night," as Maria Wain wrlgbt and her admirable assistants play it, would delight tbo author as much, we do not doubt, as it did a large audience at tbe Opera Houso last night. It is a perfect piece of art not only in tbe playing, but in tbe circum stantial details of scenery, costumes and stage management. This treatment of the play, of course, is no more than it deserves, but, heaven knows, more tban it receives in nine cases out of ten. As a matter of fact, most Shake spearean plays are produced as cheaply and inadequately in those days as they were In the Globe Theater or the Inns of Court with the divine William himself in the cast. Miss Wainwrigbt and her managers deserve the gratitude of tbe, public for tills practical and daring lnnova" tion, for treating til? Shakespearean drama with moro respect tban a brass monkey or a wooden horse comedy from the pen of a nine teenth century genius receives at tho hands of a modern manager. Perhaps no comedy of Sbakespeare bet ter deserves sympathetic treatment; that J J, gives bettor returns for pains spent upon it. Witb "Much Ado About Nothing" and "As You Like It," 'Twelfth Night" represents the fruit of Shakespeare's golden summer. These three comedies are tbe choicest gems of tbe casket. Tbcv were all produced between tbe years 159S and 1601. and 'Twelfth Night." we think, is tbe most highly wrought, tbe most thoroughly polished and pointed of thethioe. Swinburne, speaking of this era in Shakespeare's life, says: "To this stage belongs tho special faculty of faultless, joyous facile command upon each faculty re- ?uiredof the presiding genius for service or or snort. It is in tbe middle period ot his work that the language of Sbakespeare Is most limped in its fullness, tbe style most pure, tbe thought most transparent througn tuo close and luminous raiment of perfect expression." Shakespoare possibly played in 'Twelfth Night" himself when it was given for "tho first time on any stage in the hall of the Middio Tem ple. We may be sure that he bad no such subtle andpersuasive aids to theactor's art as the scene painter, the costumer and tbe gas man fur nished Miss Walnwrlght and her companions last night. Tho bower of roses was probably distinguished from the seaport and the quay by moonlight positively. but plainly and solely by a sign an nouncing the fact. Perhaps tbe new screen ot wood, curiously chased and carved, at tha end of the lawyers' banquet hall was used as a background, but not much else. Nor was the audience which bad the glory and delight of the first laugh at the humors of Sir Toby en riched by tbe presence nf tha illustrious Eliza beth and her court. No doubt the comedy stirred in them the same feelings that respond thereto in Pittsburg to-day. To come back to facts and tbe present, the Viola of Miss Wainwrigbt is a delicate and de licious embodiment of one of tbe tenderest and truest pictures of good women in Shakespeare's gallery. Marie Wainwright's Viola is worthy to be classea with the Hosalind of Miss Neil son, the Portia of Ellen Terrv. Thore issome thingot Hosalind in Viola's saucy self-congratulation at Olivia's love, but on tha whole Viola is more like Julia in "The Two Gentle men of Verona" retouched with brighter colors and placed in more poetical surround ings. Tbe tenderness of Viola, her soft, loving heart are admirably brought out by Miss Wamwright, and the character serves, as it snouiri, as a foil to tbe noisy mirth of Sir Toby, Maria and the rest. She is a star of course, but M1S3 Wainwrigbt does not attempt to o'ercloud the brilliancy of her associates. That they are abio to shine, and by right do shine, makes up the artistic roundnes of the performance. Every actor deserves to be praised by name, but we must content our selves with but a tithe of them. Tha "vellow- legged stork" JUalvolio is very well played by Mr. Barton Hill, and if there is a better Sir Toby or could bo tban Mr. Owen's be has not been revealed in this latitude. Miss Louise Muldener is the perfection or the frolic some below stairs, and Miss Blanche Walsh should havo Deen montioned before this as a graceful and spirited Olivia. Miss Walsh's elocutionary powers are remarkable. Mr. Backus, Percy Brooke, as Sir Andrew, were exceedingly well cast, and no exception cau be taken to tbo rest of the company which seems to bo vory nearly tbe samo as last year in its make-up. Tho newcomer. Mr. Granger, as The Duke, is an improvement. The scenery Is exquisite. Tbo garden scene is particularly pretty, but it is all perfectly in harmony with the play. Tbe costumes are accurate and handsome, and the incidental music not only does credit to the arranger, Mr. Frank Hawson. out was played exceed ingly well by Mr. Schwartz's orchestra, and yet last night's was tbe first performance of 'Twelfth Night" this season. Tbo Bilon Theater. Bartley Campbell's "Siberia" is not a novelty in Pittsburg, but its popularity does not appear to diminish as time goes on. A large audience laughed, wept and applauded over it at tho Bijou last night. Mr. Maurice Drew as tho hero, Nicolal ilagoff. was as manly and impres sive as of yore, anil Mr. Charles E. Gottbold in tbe rolo ot Ivan Nordoff, showed marked ability aud great improvement in his methods. Mrs. Frank Drew also deserves praise. Sara, tho heroine of tbo play, cava Miss Adelaide Fitz-AUen plenty of cbanco to display her remarkable histrionic pow ers. She cantured her audience at the first and stirred their emotions continuously. Miss Fitz-AIlon's progress in her art has been vory great. Miss Hadcliffo and Miss Ulmcr did very well, and, in iact, the company as a whole is very competent. The scenery and appointments are first-class. Academy of Jluslc. It is extremely difficult for a manager to "catch on" to something now in tho variety business, but Harry Williams has a show this week destined to play to crowded houses every performance. Tho originality is duo to Sam Jack, whose skillful, artistic band can be seen all through tho diffierent "acts." Manager Jack is trying to forget bis recent affliction in the loss of his wife, who, it will be remembered, died In this city last March, by hard work. Hu first begins with the announcement that it is a Creole Burlesnue Company, and there i3 not a white man or woman iu it. Whero ho got such n nnn,1ilnnttnn nf Aifnrnrlnt Inrl ctL'lllfrfl Anlnvail 1 men would be bard to imagine. Tbo perform ance begins with tho Tropical Revelries, introducing the whole company. Tho act is In three editions and is a burlesque on a first-class minstrel show. A feature worthy of especial mention was a tableau a beautiful Creole wrapped in flags of all nations bidden behind a large gilt fan, that parted in the mid dle and displayed tho subject, at the conclu sion of each verse of a recitation by the end men. Tbe staf o setting and costuming of 'The Beauty of tho Nile." an ancient Egyptian bur lesque, was magnificent and displayed excel lent taste. Several of the ladies were a little weak in tbeir expressions, and but for tbe ex cellent work of Billy Jackson, a clever artist unknown in this city, it would have lagged. Jackson's act is to make people laugh, and he docs it by his funny break-neck buslnoss. S.im Luc.is and his wife in their song, 'The Samo Old Home," wore applauded to tho echo, and Mr. Lucas' song, "In the Graveyard," is new and gives him many opportunities to ring in gooa-natured humor. Miss Flurenco Hines captured tbe bearts of tbe boys in the callery with her drinKing sons, which was an admira ble "take off' of a drunken man. Harry Williams' "Meteors" openod the sea son last night in Montreal. Canada, to a big bouse. It will be here October 6. "" Harrls'Tlieater. Those who saw "One of the Finest," as pre sented in tbi3 city last season, wonld scarcely recognize the version of it this week to be seen at Harri' Theater. Tha company has been strengthened throughout, by means of an en tirely new ono being engaged. The members most worthy ot mention are Edward M. Ryan, whose John Mishler is excellent; Harry S. Duffleld, Daniel J. Hart, Frank I. Fraync. Jr., juanou vjray ma&saii anu aiiss I'nosa JUCA.I1U ter as Ruth Hickman. Of the play itself noth ing need be said at this day, it being a Pitts burg favorite. The scenery employed is good and tbe rnle at Harris' this week will undoubt edly be "Standing Room Only," unless early application is made for seats. Tbo Clipper Theater. The Cyrene Vaudeville Company, with which Manager Peet reopened tba Clipper Theater yesterday, contains soma very fair talent. Cy rene herself is a tall, agile young woman, who can kick pretty high and is very much at homo on a slack wire. She dances in long skirts, and tbe details of her costnme show that she has no concern for propriety. On tho slack wire it is also evident that suggestiveness Is what Cyrene alms at. Miss Kitty Burke's Irish songs ncro highly appreciated, and she waseucored again and again. Messrs. Hatch and Campbell played on a score of curious instruments, and Georco and Aland Ricketts, Mathews and Bulger, Bel zac, -Mile. Catharine the fouialo prettidigita teur Walter Pilmmer and Earle and Ward couti United songs, dances and vaiiety business of the regulation cut. All In all, the Clipper Theater has at) amusing entertainment. Davis' PI fill Avenue Museum. The Venetian lady troubadours continue to make uncommonly sweet music in Davis' Fifth Avenne Museum. They mado such a distinct bit last week that Manager Davis retained them. Among the ferns and fountains of the roof garden M. Devere. to all appearances, burns bis wife alive on a griddle. The illusion is clever enough. Miss Delia Beck, tha 430 pound beauty from Westmoreland county is tba star curiosity. In tbe theater the pro gramme has been entirely changed. Tbero Is considerable fun of one sort or another, and the musical act of Smith and Ellis in particu lar deserves praise. The audiences yesterday were large. Tbe World' Jlosrum. Tba wonderful feats of Mr. Lewis4 Hanson and Miss MilMo Mazle continue to be' iba chief attractions at the World's Museum, in Alle gheny. Miss Malzie rides over a plank placed on Hanson's chest on horseback without in jury to tbe muscular cowboy. The human serpents, Be Bora and Do Bar. are curious con tortionists, and attracted much attention. Tbe specialty performance iu the theater is given by a select company of clever people. VOTES AND PRIZES. Popnlar Topics Tor Visitor to Yen or Nay Biilloi nnd Primary flection It o form Hnvr Do You lnnd on Connolidiition A 87S Inducement to Promolrof l'iits- bnrc'a Greatness anil Pro.porilj. The topics chosen for Exposition visitors to vote upon at Dispatch Headquarters, Bruns- wick-Ballce-Collender Billiard Company's space, during tbe first three days of this week should attract everybody. You are asked to cast your ballots to-day on the following topic: TUESDAY'S YOTIPO TOPIC. Are you in favor of party nominations by a direct vote of tbe people in place of dele gate conventions? Open to masculine voters only. WEDNESDAY'S VOTHTO TOPIC. Are you in favor of tbe Consolidation of the Cities of Pittsburg and Allegheny? Open to Lady and Gentlemen voters. The Poll Book will open and close with the Exposition each morning and evening. TO PE0M0TE PITTSBTOG. Handsome Prizes Offered far ibo Best Essay on n Splendid Topic. The Prize Essay Contest this week will be open to all writers except those directly or in directly connected with the Press of Pittsburg. The topic chosen is: What Public Undertakings will best ana most speedily promote the future Greatness and Prosperity of Pittsburg. The Dispatch offers the folloxving Prizes for tbe three best essays on the abovo topic: First Prize MO Second Prize 15 Third Prize 10 Subject to tho following conditions: L The essay must not exceed 2,000 words. 2. It must bo legibly written on one side of tbe paper only. 3. It must be original. 4. It must be received at the office ot TrrE Dispatch or at Dispatch Headquarters, Ex position Building, not later than 9 o'clock p. jr., Saturday. September 20. 5. Correct name, address and age of contest ant must accompany MSS., name only for pub lication if successful, 6. The Dispatch reserves the right to pub lish any contribution, whether it be awarded a prize or nor. Stop at The Dispatch Headquarters, Brunswick-Balke-Collender Billiard Company space, vote and secure a souvenir. C, Iu MAGEE ABEOAD. Ho Gives n New York Repot ter Ills OpIn Ions on several Snbect(. From the New York Press.l Chris Magee, of Pittsburg, has some notions about politics which ho expresses forcibly at times. I was chatting with him a day or so ago, when be said: "What I cannot understand is why some of our friends in tbe United States Senate have or pretend to havo such a horror of the legalized bavonet at the polls, but havo no feeling of abhorrence of tba illegalized shotgun at tbo polls. Tbey seem to think that the bayonet would ruin tho country, but are willing to let the shotgun make certain of the destruction of the most important feature of onr government tbo sacredness of the ballot. I havo no patience whatever with men who sit in the Senate, and, in face of tbo united senti ment of the Republican party, refuse to pass law which will enforce the freedom of the ballot, while they wink at outrages like those in Arkansas. The Republican party never had so much vitality as when it has stood upon questions of great principle, When it was de manded that the elections bill should be laid over in order to pass tha tariff bill it was put tine aside principle for money getting. The voters in Tom Reed's district have shown what they think about the matter bv giving him a majority that says both tbe tariff and elections bills should bo passed." In talking with Mr. Magee lie told me some things abont Congressman John Dalzell, of Pittsburc, who has made an enviable record in the Houso and attained a national reputation. He is the son of a shoemaker, who expended all his savings In sending his son to college. When Dalzell wpnt to Concress first in 1SSC, he was makine S0O.O0C to EC0.000 a year as a prac ticing lawyer in Pittsburg. He was attorney for tbe Pennsylvania Railroad, and tbe labor troubles which had occurred had left so much bad blood between the road and tho laboring men In Pittsburg that there were many Repub licans wbo thought it inadvisablo to nominato Dalzell. Magee. however, said he wonld take his chances ou Dalzell getting tne labor vote. He added that the corporations always cot the best men their money would hire to conduct their law affairs, and consequently that any district which could socuro m Congress tho services of a man like Dalzoll for S5.C0C a year ought to jump at tbo opportunity. The result of ibe campaign was a vindication of Magce's views. Dalzell went among tbo labor men and told them of his ancestry, his toil, his success in securing an education, and got so many of their votes that ho bad the largest Republican majority that bad beou casein his district in years. He was renominated for a third term unanimously. WEICKS IK CANADIAN WATEES. Tbo Record of I.lfo Snvluc Includes One From This Com try. OTTATVA.September 15. Tbe supplementary report of the Marine Department, which has just boon issued, sbos tha number of wrecks in Canadian waters during tbo year 18i9 were 161. 57 being total wrecks. Eighty-nine lives were lost. Forty-seven per sons received recognition for tbeir services in saving life, 33 from the Canadian, 6 from the British, and 1 each from the United States, Spanish and Italian Governments. A Ticket Willi Two Heads. from the Cleveland Leader.; "What is the matter with this-ticket for 1892: For President, William McKinley, of Ohio; for Vice-President, Thomas B. Reed, of Maine?" asks a correspondent. Well, that would baa ticket with two heads. It is one of several first-class tickets the Republicans could make. Knlm-ftl Gn Expectations. From the Buffalo Times. Tbebizsnpply of natural gas in prospect from Canada ought to solve the smoke problem to the satisfaction of factory owners. Stop pol luting the atmosphere! THE OLD-YELLOW FU3IPKIN. How dear to this heart Is the old yellow pump kin. When orchards are barren or stnfflnR for pies! When peaches and apples have both been a fail ure, And berries of no kind have greeted tbe eyes. How fundly we turn to the fruit of the corn field, The fruit that our children are taught to de spise: The old yellow pumpkin, the mud-covered pump kin. The blg-bellled pumpkin that makes snch good pies I Ob, golden-hued pumpkin, you surely are "in it," You Jolly old rascal, so recently spurned; We ask your forgiveness for thus having wronscd you. When lrom your dear presence we scornfully turned, Come rolling down bill 'till wo meet you and greet you. Yonr balk is a fetst to onr fralt hnniry eyes; We love yon, old pumpkln,.so well we could eat TO". For you are a "dandy" when made into pies. , sunxiuiawney apiru. SNAP SH0TSJN SEASON. Whex a man falls from grace be shatters bis reputation. If you want to see how we live to eat make a tour of Liberty street in tba' morning. From CPU to end of tbe commission house quarter grocers' vehicles fill tbe streer, and the gong of the cable car pilot Is constantly clanged for right of way. Tbe cars seem to zig-zag through the line of horses, wheels, bobbing beads and drivers' cries, instead of running on the straight track. How casualties are avoided only tha gnpmen and tho teamsters can tell. It's a sight to make you hunger, lor all that. Piles of produce grown in field and garden Noith, South, East and West swiftly disappear from the pavement and OH clean, gaily-painted covered rigs of grocerymen. Load attar load departs to every quarter of tbe city to minia ture markets which lighten tbe good house wife's labors ai-d saves her sboeleather. It's an animating scene on a sunshiny morning. It gives you some idea of tbe demands of the table, of tbe requirements of life, of tbe ca pacities of our stomachs, of tho curiosities of our cookery, of the bounly of our farms and gardens, of tbe diversity of our products, of the peculiarities of our climate. It's a living picture of the Land of Plenty. When-a brick falls fr m on high and strikes a pedestrian it's a trifle heavier than air. The fellow who hunts a fight Is usually ac commodated. ' Tears too often choke tbe voice of hunger. If churches were wicked the congregations would be larger. First Impressions of foreigners aref requant ly funny. After tho little parade Saturday night a young gentleman asked what it meant. He was informed that it was a political demon stration, but only a baby affair as compared with blowous during a Presidental year; that this was an off year. When asked what be thought of American politic?, he remarked: "Well. I'm over only a few months. I never saw lights in a parade or dusky torchbearers before. I'm reading tho papers, though, and from what I can judge the Presidency seems to lie between Mr. Reed and John L. Sullivan!" This is a fact. Foreigners cannot fathom Amer ican fun. A -whisky bottle is chuck full ot ideas. The only thing the State Department should consider is tbe fact that poor Barrundia was shot nnder tha folds of tbe flag. Tbe stories of the tragedy should be an after consideration. The ways of the world must bo cross-ways to cross-eyed people. The member wbo jumped up in Congress the other day and sarcastically yelled, "What's Butterwortb, anyway?" cannot be blamed for bis ignorance, as tba Record does not carry market reports. In Pittsburg it's worth from 25 to 30 cents. Home is a splendid winter resort. Death rides on the gale. After a blow nearly all the sailors on a ship off Patagonia were stricken, many dying. Tbo old man with the scythe must be doubling tho Horn. The pantaloons of corner loafers never bag at tbe knees. How they whip the devil around the stump, to be sure. The Leary lumber raft gets In duty free under the guise of a foreign vessel built iu American waters. This is decidedly leery. JUDQINO from soma of tha matrimonial afterclaps, Cupid must be a bypnotlzer. Ir mind-readers could be utilized in politics, what schemes could be uncovered and what little games would be spoiled. THE higher the grain the smaller the loaf. Whek the McKinley bill goes Into opera tion the tax on wine and barley will take a jnmp. Perhaps water Is destined to become a favorite beverage alterall. Fast talkers don't choose their words. Tbey chew them. Give us, oh, give us the man who sings at his workl wrote Carlyle. If Carlyle had worked in a newspaper office he never would have written this. THE Kentucky man who clubbed the reporter is ready lor the cold, cold ground. The Johnstown church elder who said "Madam, yon are a liar," is evidently reading tbe Congressional Record closer than the Bible. Isn't it about time for Mr. Delamater to take a day off and write that letter of acceptance. Cold weather has a bad effect on gas meters. It makes them too fast. A policeman on the Hill yesterday pnt two shots into a very small dog, then clubbed it, then dosed Ic with lead again, then some more club. A big crowd of children, women, and the few men in tbe neighborhood wbo bad nothing to do, were in at poor doggie's death Why not stop this cruel practice? If a dog bites be mercilul in enforcing the death rienaltv. Street scenes of this sort will not teach the little ones to be humane. That dog's death agony will haunt the slumbers of the children who looked on. Russet cider now takes the place of tho rus set shoe. Touch it lightly, though. The cider of to-day is not the cider of onr daddies. The bowlers bave their Inning now. There are no Sallies In tbo Pittsburg Allies, however. It's fine, healthy sport, girls, and you should try it. Jack Frost and Old bol meet on debatable ground in this neck of the woods. Fkost helps tho oyster, too. Thcre'san"r"init, Desk room is at a premium in the school rooms. Put wings on tho bouses, gentlemen, and let the young idea soar. Fruit dealers are nervous. They have to scan their small change closely now on account ol the counterfeit $100 bills in circulation. We havo the legitimate In undress thU week at one theater. Whes a young man rings a society belle the whole neighborhood hears it, and everybody ex pects to go to tho wedding. Ir YOU want to sea nature in her autumn suit run out to Schenley Park. Steel trinkets will be the rage in London next winter, 'lhcy should catch on in Pittsburg. When the Harrison's have to cook their own meals over alog fire they will conclude that life in a mountain cottago Is a delusion. A iady's fan agitates the hearts of her suit ors as well as the air they breathe. The man who wraps himself In thought and forgets his overcoat will catch cold these cool evenings. Money seems to bo Where's that surplus? in great demand. When Eve grew inquisitive Adam ordered a fall suit. Blair's speech on the Educational bill con tained 273.000 words. Ho simply talked his hobby to death. Ambition is all right, but don't sacrifice the mail things of life for it. Several editors In Cannon's district bave decided to unload him. They're not for Joe anymore. Joe Howard says It costs abont as much to die as to live. But tbe fellow in the coffin don't have to settle the bill, Joseph. Let tha living enjoy themselves. ' The Sultan is a barem-scarem chap. WlXilE WlHKXE. CURIOUS CONDENSATIONS. There are 3,117 insane persons in the Wisconsin asylums. An Apalachicnla, Fla., resident killed a rat that weighed 7 pounds. Rev. Mr. Arney, tbe Michigan horse racing parson, has acknowledged his error and promises not to do so again. A trotting race for oxen, single and donhle, will ba a conspicuous feature of tbe Cheboygan, Mich., county fair. A six-year-old boy, while fishing in a Wisconsin stream, was pulled ont of a boat and nearly drownod by an imuiei.se fish. Henry Walker, of Waylonza, Fla., is the owner of a pi-; that has six feet and 21 toes, while a neighbor fcas one with only two f eot. J. H. Salmon is a Brunswick, Micb., antiquarian. He has a valuable collection of coins ranging from Ci years B. C. to A. D. 112i The Athnt.1, Ga., Fair Association offered premiums rr rat scalps.and one farmer brought in 4,800, killed on his farm, and got the first premium. The explanation of the peculiar densitr of thunder clouds is said to lia in tbe fact that the vapor is partially condensed into drops by the electrical action. As early as 1853 a Bristol and Exeter broadgauge locomotive, carrying a light load and running on a falling grade, developed a speed of SO miles an hour. At Astoria, Ore., there is an original and unique sign which reads: "Jeffs Restaur ant. Tbe Place to Live Well While You do Live. You Will be Dead a Long Time." Three years ago G. E. Gordon turned loose two wild turkeys on bis stock farm near Jefferson. Wis. Now there are great numbers of tbem on tbe shores of Lake Koshkonong. Fred Babner, of Heading, suddenly ex perienced a loss of weight from 158 to 88 pounds, and a few days ago found the cause of it to be five lizards that had been living in his stomach. A census of frnli-benring treeJ has been taken in Los Angeles county by Messrs. Mitch ell and Smith, who devoted three months to J52,.wI!F- They report the total number at 10,3uo,37a. The gold medal awarded Michigan for her educational exhibit at the Melbourne, Australia, exposition in 1SSS hxs just been re ceiyed at Lansing. It is .r Anstralian gold, and weighs nearly two ounces. Annie Brown, colored, lives in Houston county. Ga, She Is 47 years old. weighs 500 pounds, Is 5 feet 8 inches in higbt, 7 feet 3 inches in circumference around the bust, 8 feet 4 inches around the waist, and 30 inches around the arm near the shoulder. A fruit stand in Palatka, Fla., sells for a nickel all tbo coacoanuts that a person can take away in his pockets. Several, wbo thonehttbevsawagooilthingin this tried is and lost their nickel. Tna nuts had tha sheila on and would not go iu any pocket. For some time the little town of La Grande, Ore., has been infested with tough Characters. Ono day last week the people de cided to clean tho town, and they made a raid on tbe saloons. The round-up lnclnded four laro banks, four poker games. wheel of for tune, and a chuck-a-luck lay-out. A big moose made its appesrance in Levant, Me. A citizen who forgot It was close time, and seizing his rifle shot tho animal in a neighbor's yard, has just paid tba fine of 8100. It was quite costly sport forhim,bnt he consoled biuiselt witb tbe thought that a moose doesn't walk up to the muzzle of a gun every day. It is not generally known that excessive palpitation of tha heart can be promptly stopped by bending double, with the bead downward and the arms pendant, so that tem porary congestion nf the upper part of the body is produced. If tbe breath bo bold at tha same time the effect ot this action is hastened. Judge D. C. Dawkins, o Jacksonville, nas a unique Masonic souvenir sent to him by a friend in Delaware. It Is a square, coinpasse-i and letter G s..m-netr cdly molded anV. Ubeled. "Madeoi L. m'.cd States nat:on il ban4 notP. rrlrrined and m cerated at tbe Unitedly States! r asnryDepartmcnt,estimitedS15,000.' M J. D. Smith is a crippled ttx collector ' of Charleston, Me. So great is tbe sympathy or his neighbors for him that although be'3 un able to move about, the taxpayers all help him io periorm nis duties In an eirective manner, and men havo been known to actually take blm in their arras and carry hiin to where he could attach their property. r As a Belfast lady was combing her hair in a room in the second-story, a littlo bird flew in at tha open window and alighting on a wash bowl which contained water, proceeded to take a bath. When it had completed its ablutions in bird fashion, it shook off tba superfluous moisture and flew out of the widow, paying no attention to tbe occupant of tho room. Sawlell, the supposed slayer of his brother, seeks to escape from the burden of his thoughts as he lies in jail by making out of bits of different kinds of wood, a trinket box, which is really quite a meritorious bit of handi work. It is 15x10 Inches in size and S inches high, and Is very prettily inlaid. The inside is lined with velvet, and contains one tray, sup plied with the usual partitions. As the lid is iiiiea a mirror is disclosed. There is a conductor on a Cincinnati street car wbo was recently appointed, who is heir to an estate in England valued at $150,000. The yonng man visited tho home of his ances tors some time ago and arranged to convert tho property into cash. While awaiting tho money lie is putting in his time manipulating the bell punch. It l said he has arranged with some of the stockholders of the railroad com pany to Invest his money in the company. The city of Berlin, Wis., boasts of num bering among its population ono of the oldest peoplo in tho country. Tha lady. Mrs. Roso Woodwortn, was born in the State of Maine In the year 1783. so that she Is now 102 years old. She is feclinir better now than she did two years ago, retains all her mental faculties, and doctors inform her that she will live for ten years longer. She has seen every President of the United States elected, and remembers well the day when George Washington died. Of the novel applications of electricitr there is no end. Bakers are now nsing tho elec tric motor as a bread-mixer, and are tbns en abled to do in four or five minutes an amount of work that would otherwise require hours of hand labor. A writer in a medical paper say3 he has frequently obtained much relief from facial neuralgia bv applying an incandescent light to tbo part affected. He sugeests that tho lamp could also be usedinpoulticingadvan t.neouMy. It could belaid over a flixseednr other form of poultice and constant heat could be thus secured. A FEW GOOD LAUGHS. Sunday school tearher (sternlv) Where do boys go wbo fish on the. holy Sabbath Day? Very small Johnny (trlnmphantly) 1 know. Down to JlcCullom's Cove. Washington Post, Banker Are you not a burglar? Hanker No; a friend. Banker What are you dolne In my bedroom at midnlzht? Hanker-Keeping watch. Sif lings. Happy Northfield student after examina tion day-Dear papa, I went through the war of the rebellion without a scratch. Practical Father-Sly dear child, apply for a pension Immediately under the new law. -Veto Xork Tribune. "Didn't he return your love?" asked a friend of a disconsolate yonng man. Ho, " was the disconsolate yonng man's reply, "but she returned my letters yesterday, together with all the presents 1 had ever given her." Somerctlle Journal, Benedict I understand you are going to marrv Miss Cuttem, the tailor's daughter. Singleton-Yes. "Ah, er, do you tblnk she's Jast the girl for you?" "Why, yes. Her father suited me for a long time, sol think the daughter will." JTunsei's Wetktg. Fair entertainer (to young operator) What side of tbe market-is that the way to put lt?-sre you on this week, Mr. Brokaw? Young operator (at other end of tbecofa)-! am what they call a "bear," Miss Kajones. Fair entertainer Indeed! Yon yon don't act the least bit In tbe world like a bear, Mr. Brotawv "Have vou theater tickeU for this even lng?" Inquired the wire of a World's fair. director a day or two ago. "Yes." ' "Where are they located? Are they la the parquet?" "Yes," ho answered, absently, "some or theni ar in Park row and soma of them ia Jackson Park." Chicago Tribune, Wife (to her husband) When you are down town. John, step Into the store and bay me some scouring soap; there Isn't a bit In the house. Little Johnny (looking up from a newspaper ha Is readlnz) Wouldn't posse be good in place of soap? "Posset What do you mean?" "Why, the paper tells about a train robbery and lays a posse Is scouring the woods for the rob ben.-SVtingi.