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PITTSBURG. BUN DAT. JULY IS, 1890.
TEE DISPATCH FOB THE BUMMER.
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PATCH hit been removed o Corntr of
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SILVER NEARLY HF.TTLED.
The illver bill now requires but tho sig
nature of tbe President to becomo a law. If
pasted the Home yesterday, after tbe brief
est of debatei, with many votci to spare.
The bill It a Republican measuro approved
by tbe regular party majorities' In tho
Homo and Senate, and for thli rcaion,
if for no other, President Harrison Is most
likely to sigh It Humor has It that the bill
doei not sire entire satisfaction at tbe "White
Home. This may well be. for not all Re
publicans are pleased with the measure, and
yet Mr. Harrison has shown no sign of a
disposition to actively antagonizes tho leaden
of his party. He will probably sign tbe
bill. It is best for the country that be
should do so, for uncertainty as to the coin
age is a disturbing element in the national
finances. Tbe bill is the best compromise
that conld be bad under the circumstances,
and it is greatly preferable to tbe extreme
legislation which the silver men sought to
impose upon the country through the Senate.
A QUESTION OF RANK AND NAME.
Elsewhere in to-day's Dispatch Mr.
George T. Oliver tells bow a compact and
homogeneous city of 415,000 inhabitants,
Tanking seventh on the list of American
cities, could be made out of Pittsburg, Al
legheny and some of the suburbs. Mr.
Oliver speaks by the book. He has just
finished an earnest and successful super
Tision of the local census. He has the in
struction of official figures and the quality
of judgment which carries weight with the
community.
In expressing the desire for the proper
rank and prestige for Pittsburg, Mr. Oliver
but states an intensely prevalent feeling.
Nearly everybody who is interested in
Pittsburg's prosperity, no matter where re
siding, wishes this. Yet there are already
signs of difference when we come to disenss
plans. It has already been made clear
that some of the Northsiders who are in
politics do not like consolidation. It is not
absolutely certain that all -the Allegheny
and suburban property holders have got
over their suspicion that Pittsburg is rashly
extravagant, or their preference for the
small economies on their own side, which
result In a low tax rate and slow and meagre
improvements. There is even the added
factor that Pittsburg is not now so anxious
for Allegheny as it was in 1868. The pros
pect that Allegheny will bring an early ex
penditure of millions for new water works
and badly wanted street improvements, is
sot calculated to warm the courtship.
And yet Mr. Oliver and the hundreds of
Other prominent men of Pittsburg and Alle
gheny who have expressed the same opinion
are right-in insisting that Pittsburg should
have its proper rank by population, as it
lias by business, among American cities.
The question then is how to accomplish
tjjis, disarm all opposition and produce con-
xt of action in place of division, suspicion
and distrust
The Dispatch long ago set out tho
ceded plan. It will now revert to it.
iVhat everybody concedes to be primarily
desirable is that the city in name and pop
ulation sbonld rank rightly before the
country. This can be bad and still leave
to Pittsburg and Allegheny and to each of
he boroughs its own separate government
bsolutely as each now stands. All re
juired is a simple act of tho legislature
creating cities of a fourth class such to be
created where two or more contiguous cities
and borongbs elect to assume a common
name, retaining, however, their separate
governmental fnnctioni and offices strictly
under previously existing laws. This
would leave absolutely the matters of offices,
politics, indebtedness, improvement and
taxation In every respect as they are now.
The combined city might have a few nom
inal, ornamental or honorary officers, with
sinecures and no salaries, if it choose, or a
sort of honorary council to confer on mat
ters of common interest. Practically every
thing might be the same, but tbe name and
rank of tbe new corporate city. Pittsburg,
Allegheny and the boroughs would still be
severally each in its own class as it is now,
and governed only by tbe laws of that class.
This arrangement is not theoretical merely
The great city of London is to governed.
01 course it may be argued that a consoli
dation in government as well as In name
and style would have advantages. Doubt,
leu this is true; but it Is evident already
that the plan for such must be slowly and
thoughtfully matured If it is to be a wise
one; and it will meet antagonistic dementi
according to its details. Above, however,
is outlined a simple plan for gaining the
primary object desired by all. If later ex
perience and examination show common in
terests in other things, such as free bridges,
water works etc., desirable, this would lead
to it withont disturbing tbe separate in
dividuality of the various districts for local
governmental purposes. In short, it Is a
question whether, if what is at all doubtfnl
of being bad may not be got, that which every
one reasonably desires, and which nobody
conld object to, should not bo got, when a
few lines of legislative enactment would se
cure it.
Upon such a basis Pittsburg, Allegheny
and'tte adjacent boronghs would secure the
ndvertitement and prestige that their indus
tries and combined popnlation warrant; and
no place bt left for tbe apprehensions which
the mere mtntion of "consolidation" seem
to raise up.
MR. REED'S PlRLIAMENTARY LAW.
The article ih the Korth American lie
view, which made taince,-meat of Speaker
Reed's parliamentary law, has been credited
to Mr. Blaine. This is doubtless due to the
wish which is father to the thought on the
part of the opposition, where rich a fight
between the two most positive leaders of the
Repnblican party would be observed with
the keenest interest and pleasure. The New
York Sun, however, from the internal evi
dence of the article, credits it, not to the
Secretary of State, but to "a distinguished
Republican philosopher and journalist who
bails from a city about three thousand miles
from Augusta, Me., who has never sat in
the Speaker's chair, whose parliamentary
knowledge was gained by a dozen years' ex
perience at the other end of tbe capitol, and
who has always been about as friendly to
Brother Blaine as Blaine is supposed to be
to the Hon. Thomas Brackett Reed." This
is a very good description of the Hon. Geo.
C. Gorham.
It is really less important in a public
point of view to determine the authorship
of the article than to settle the fact whether
its criticisms of the Speaker's course are
well-founded. There may, of course, be a
great deal of personal interest in the idea
that Republican leaders are, for purely
selfish reasons, attacking tho Speaker's
partisan rulings. But tho question which
most concerns tbe people at large ii whether
the parliamentary decisions, under whloh
the course of legislation has been determined,
and tho business of tbe country shaped for
weal or woe.have been based upon impartial
principles, or goverencd only by partisan
ship and favoritism. The relative import
ance of tlioUo questions is that between
the selfish purposes of rival politician! and
tliojutllconnd fairness of national legisla
tion. On tho latter point there Ii unfortunately
Httla doubt; and tho assertions of tbe arti
cle convey little new Information as to the
disregard by the Speaker of the fairness
which is the foundation of parliamentary
law. It may bring out the details of tht
ease with moro trenchant forte; but the
most conclusive evidence of Mr. Reed's
superiority to all the obligations ot Impar
tiality which should govern a Speaker's
conrse, Is furnished by that gentleman him
self. Tho parliamentary principles which
he has asserted at Speaker are exactly those
which are denied by Thomas B. Reed as a
member of tbe House. The principles which
be declared as a member be has over-ridden
and ignored as Speaker. Mr. Reed's great
characteristic as a leader is the energy with
which he pursues his political purposes.
But when that energy reaches the develop
ment of asserting one set of fundamental
and constitutional principles, when his par
tisan purposes are subserved thereby, and
of asserting exactly the opposite principles
when party exigencies -call for the somer
sault, it affords an almost wanton declaration
of bis fealty to the political school which
regards principles as of the slightest value
beside the attainment of partisan purposes
by fair means or the contrary.
In one respect, however, Mr. Reed mnst
be credited with consistency in the exertion
of the Speaker's powers. Abont a year ago
he pnblished a magazine article in which he
spoke of tbe abuses that could be perpetrated
in the Speaker's chair. Since he has at
tained to those powers,he has been consistent
in affording a practical demonstration of the
abuses which can be inflicted by a partisan
and partial Speaker.
LOOK AT YOUR COFFEE!
"When we think of what the matutinal
cup of coffee means to the majority of
Americans we can hardly find language
strong enough to stigmatize the rascals who
strive to rob that cup of its virture by
adulteration. The chops may be burned,
the eggs prove antique, the butter strong,
the bread dry, but if the cup of
coffee be fragrant and rich, tinctured
to the taste with sugar and cream, breakfast
is not a failure. The mean swindler who
seeks to palm off imitation coffee beans
made of flonr or worse, ought to be hung.
The particulars of this miserable fraud,
originating, we are ashamed to say, in Phila
delphia, are given in another place, and
everyone should read them. The action of
Arbuckles & Co. in warning the trade of
this trick is to be warmly commended.
CONTEMPT FOR THE LAW.
A very remarkable position is assumed by
the Delaware, Lackawanna and "Western
Railroad in its answer to the complaint of
one of its shippers before the inter-State
Commerce Commission. Of course it de
nies that it has discriminated against the
complainant That is the regular course
for all railroads to take in connection with
such cai.es. But its unique position is the
declaration that it is transporting coal for
the complainant nnder a contract made sev
eral years ago. at a less charge than the pub
lished rate of $1 80 per ton.
In other words, the railroad company in
forms tbe inter-State Commerce Commission
that it is not violating tbe law to the preju
dice of its prosecutor, but is violating it in
his favor. If it is bound by contract to give
its shipper a certain rate, it is bound by the
inter-State commerce law to make that its
published charge and to iransport for all
shippers at the same figure. If the contract
was to give this shipper a lower rate than
the general public It was a violation of the
charter obligations of the company, and its
continuance after the passage of the inter
state commerce law was no lets a wanton
violation of that enactment
It is a remarkable exhibition of the lack
of respect for the provisions of the act, shown
by the railroads, when a corporation, as a
matter of sell-jnstification, openly declares
to the body having the enforcement of the
active charge, that it has violated the law in
another way than is alleged against it The
slight obedience shown to tbe law is charge
able clearly to a lack of enforcement "When,
after four years, it ii perceived by the rail
THE
roads that not a single step lias been taken
by (bt Inter-State Commerce Commission to
enforce the penalties of the act against of.
fenders, It is not strango that they should
pay little attention to its provisions, but it is
an unexpected exhibition of contompt, alike
for the act and for the Commission, that the
railroad should coolly Inform tbe latter body
that it has violated the law, and regard that
as a defense against tho charge of another
violation.
If a man accused of picking pockets on
the street should inform the j udge that he
was not guilty, because at the time specified
he was committing burglary at another
place, be would very speedily find himself
in limbo for the offense which he avowed.
Tbe least energy or sincerity on tbe part of
the Inter-State Commerce Commission, in
its pretense of enforcing the law, would lead
to similar steps against this avowed violator
of the statute.
A P8WEELESB TRUST.
It is a rather peculiar commentary on the
arguments which shape legislation that
after the international copyright bill has
been defeated, on the plea that its provisions
would permit the formation of a book pub
lishers' combination, exactly such a con
solidation has been organized in New York
to control the publication of cheap books
which are not copyrighted.
Nevertheless, it is possible that the pre
dictions of success for the combination in
shutting off the competition which produced
cheap books and sold them through the
drygoods bazaars may prove to rest on a
slender foundation. Possibly the competi
tion in the publication of these books for
the past year or two was a losing one. But
every one knows that these books were sold
by the bazaars because there was a
slight margin of profit in the large
sales secured by the low prices. It
is asserted that the new combination
will be able to prevent competition by con
trolling tbe system of distribution-through
the news companies. But the sale through
the drygoods bazars shows a means of dis
trlbntion entirely-independent of the news
companies, and one which, by tbe nature of
the ease, must always be open to competi
tion. It is quite possible that if the new com
bination attempts to re-establish the old and
excessive margins in the book trade, they
will only stimulate new competition in the
publication of cheap books. Wherever
there is money to be made either in the pub
lishing or sale of cheap books at low prices,
there, it may be taken for granted, indus
trial enterprise will make itself felt Tho
new organisation can control the trade as
long as It keeps prices so low as to dis
courage competition, and no longor.
Snch efforts to organize against competi
tion art little to be feared, unless they pos
sess some extraneous means for freezing out
and stifling new competition. "When they
demonstrate the txlstenco of such a power
then it ii time for legislation to tako hold of
them.
WHAT CAUHEA IT?
A rather queer exhibition of reasoning Is
furnished by a member of the Paclflo Mall
Steamship Company, In commenting on the
report that China will undertake retaliatory
measures for our policy of Chinese exclu
sion. That gentleman says :
Injury to the Paclflo Mall Steamship Com
pany will be the first incident In exact pro
portion will the Interests ot the Canadian Pa
clflo Bttamshlp Line profit. It Is no secret that
for half a dozen years It has been tho aim ot
tbe British Government to securo some snch
measure from China. As John Stuart Mill
onco said: "Tno entire foreign policy of En
gland Is dishonorable."
The assertion with regard to tbe foreign
policy of England may be true enough in
the main; but it is entirely inapposite to
drag it in in connection with our loss of Chi
nese trade. If tho United States chooses to
take a course which will inevitably drive
away Chinese commerce, it will be difficult
to show where there is anything dishonora
ble in England and the Canadian Steamship
Company taking the alienated commerce.
Moreover, the fact is patent that neither
England nor the Canadian Pacific Steam
ship Company have bad the slightest influ
ence in the acts which incited China to re
taliation. Neither of them had tbe power
to secure the passage ot the Chinese exclu
sion act, nor the rejection of the treaty with
China which has alienated the Oriental em
pire. If the first incident of these acts is in
jury to the Pacific Mail Steamship Com
pany, what responsibility is there outside
of the political system which produced these
acts?
It is by no means certain that the loss of
Chinese commerce is as great a misfortune
to this country as the immigration of Chi
nese labor would be; but in considering the
question it is wiser to recognize the actual
causes which produce retaliatory steps on
tbe part of China, than to charge all the ills
to which corporate flesh is heir, to the com
petition of the Canadian transportation
lines.
TWO WRONGS AGAIN.
The citizens of Apollo are not disposed to
permit the original package business to be
begun in their town without entering a very
positive protest At a meeting yesterday
some of the leading men of the place ex
pressed very radical views upon the
situation. Threats were made that
if Mr. Silverman tried to set np "an
original package" business in Apollo
he would have a violent opposition to con
tend with. We sympathize with the citizens
of Apollo in their dilemma, but their pro
posal to break the law in order to prevent
liquor being sold under the decision of the
Supreme Court is viciousj Even if there is
no remedy at present under the laws, it is
no excuse for a flagrant breach of other laws,
as the destruction of Mr. Silverman's prop
erty would be. A law abating the original
package nuisance will soon be passed, and
Apollo must wait for that
The Democratic Philadelphia Timet has
bad a great deal of Inn recently in publishing
letters to Mayor Fitler, couched in terms
that Intimate tbe assertion on the part ot that
official of something like monarchical rank and
power. This was generally supposed to bo tbe
effort of an unbridled and ribald opposition
paper: bnt since It has come out that the Mayor
has undertaken to issuo "special passports" to
tbe tsacbers who won In a voting contest for a
European trip, there Is ground for suspecting
that tbe Mayor takes himself seriously as ono
of tbe mighty ot the earth. The State Depart
ment bas good-humoredly lntlmatod to
the Mayor that Issuing passports is
one of its prerogatives; and there is
hope that tbe municipal functionary will ro
allzo a more just opinion of his own Impor
tance. Iz does not dispel all the fears of a diffi
culty arising between this country and En
gland over the BebrlngBea question to bear
that Mr. Harrison laughs over it But wo pre
sume the President's hilarity Is reassuring.
NOW is the season for that dellghtlnl
Story about snow and a thermometer below
freezing point on the top of Mt. Washington.
This does not especially lower the temperature
In city streets; but It is calculated to causo a
tendency of summer travel In tbe direction of
the White Alonntaissi or rather It would do so
PITTSBURG- DISPATCH,
if tho advertisement had not become rather
familiar In past years. Seekers of caol spots
may be disposed to bans about tbe enter edges
of an area of freezing temperature! but ex.
ptrlance has taught tbem that tbe coldness Is
apt to be fleeting.
The, health authorities of this olty are
dlsoovertng tbat tbey can compel tbe owners
of foul and overcrowdod tenement bouses to
Institute reforms. Keep up tbe good work of
cleaning out the hotbeds ot disease I
Tbe way in which Speaker Reed orders
Congressman Beldeu to direct the Republican
press to enjoin tbe Senate to pass tbe Federal
election bill without delay, presents a new
picture of the source and origin of power. The
old story about how tbe infant ruled tho State
by ruling Its mother, who ruled Its father, who
was a nominal ruler, Is not unfamiliar at pres
ent; but this newest Una, of authority Is pecu
liar In tho way by which all political power at
present discovers its source in tbe Speaker of
the House of Representatives.
The first serious fire ior some time did a
great deal of damage in Allegheny City list
night The Porter Foundry and Machine
Company's works were destroyed.
The fact that that 25,000,000 gas syndi
cate which was to have been floated by London
promoters has been thrown back on tbe hands
ot the Americans, is hailed by tbe Eastern
press as an opportunity for American capital.
Considering that American capital has always
bad tho opportunity, tho conclusion is rather
inapposite A more direct inference would be
tbat the business of selling American proper
ties to EneUsh Investors at three or four times
their cash value has been worn to a threadbare
and Innocuous condition.
Mb. Caeneqie gave Mr. and Mrs,
Stanley an uncut diamond of groat value for a
wedding present Tbe bride has a rough j ewel
to polish in her lord and master.
The July reports of the crops are more
favorable than their predecessors. "Winter
wheat as a whole is nfsfavorable; bnt the aver
age for spring wheat rxstkes up for the defi
ciency. The showing for the cotton crop is one
of the best on record. While the crops have
undergone many severe vicissitudes in tbelr
progress from seed time to the approaching
harvest there Is little donbt that our agricul
tural Interests will turn out an abundance for
tbe needs of this country with a surplus for tbe
consumers of Enrope.
Stanley is a Benedict Let us hope
tbat his exploration of tbe dark oontlnent of
matrimony may reveal to him the happiest
discoveries.
CONQEESSMAN BUTTEBWOBTIt'fl attaok
ot cramps Is charged by the "Washington JPoit
to tbe nso of iced tea, and that paper com
mends the Congressional brand ot tea to the
attention of tbe Congressman. Ourcotempo
rary's predilection is marked, bnt dots It mean
to assert tbat cramps are worse tban snakes?
Tub faot that the silver bill Is compro
mised seems to bo the necessary result of
Congress having bad so m ueh to do with It
Btatb FisuwAitDEir Haoud has been
doing good work on tho Allegheny. Ho bai
captured an Immense amount of Illegal nots,
and prosoeuted In an exemplary fashion offend
ers against tbe gamo laws. Flsbormen, as well
as little flsbos, should bo grateful to him.
PROMINENT PEOPLE,
Cntnr Justiob Pullsji and General John
C. Ulaok aro visiting Boston,
Miss Louisr Ihoqenb Quinsy, tbe pottesi,
thinks nothing of walking 20 miles on her
pootlo foet
Providence, R. I., bas a female pastor in
tho person ot Mrs. AnnaQarlan Sponcer, who
bas charge of tbe Boll Btroet Gburoh,
Tub peoplo of Trenton, N.'J., propoio to
bllld a monument to tbe lato Secretary Fro
llngbuysen, whose homo was In tbat city.
Govehnor Nichols's veto of tho" lottery
bill has already won him tbe nomination of
Vice President from a Boston newspaper.
Mus. Delia Cross, ot Brooklyn, is owner
and master of tbe scbooner Oregon and is said
to be tbe only woman who is matter ot a sea
going vessel.
J. Van BBEBShas Jnit refused tbe third class
medal awarded to blm by the jury ot the Paris
Salon, on the ground tbat It was Inconsistent
with his reputation.
Sarah Bernhardt says that whenever she
bas a fit ot anger it is invariably followed by
sickness, and tbe wonder Is, tberefore, tbat
Sarah is not bedridden all tbe time.
Five members of tbe Havemeyer family
have Insured tbelr lives for 100,000 each. The
policies were written by two agents and the
joint commission will amount to 560,000.
Henry Rochefort spends much of his
spare time in London in tbe art galleries and
the British Museum. He runs his paper by
telegraph. 'He has grown to like tbe English.
Justice Stephen Field is tbe poorest man
In dollars and cents on tbe Supreme Bencb,
and yet he is several removes from being bard
up. His residence Is one of tbe finest in "Wash
ington. Ex-Fostiiaster General J Aiizs smypa
thizes with the striking London postmen. He
says tbey are greatly underpaid, receiving less
than half the pay of New York postmen, and
tbey are compelled to do much more work.
Another woman who has made her mark as
a lawyer is Mrs. Ada Blttenbender, of Osceola,
Neb. She has tried many cases before the
Supreme Court of Nebraska and has not lost
one. Mary L. McGlndly, of Detroit, was also
admitted recently to practice law.
AIL THROUGH THE STATE.
Chester has a "cat exchange."
The State editors will move on to Washing
ton this week.
Norristown's dog population Is very large.
It will discount Clarion's.
Fish wardens say that tbe Hungarians along
tbe Schuylkill kill the fish with dynamite.
The Lebanon 'match factory received an
order for ten carloads of matches recently.
A candle fell into a child's coffin at Sonth
Easton, and the corpse was nearly cremated.
Mrs. Nancy MoMullen, aged 78 years.
-one of the oldest residents, died in Oil City Fri
day.
A resident of Wayne complains that no
enumeration of the census of tbat place has
been taken yet,
"Drowned while bathing, because he conld
not swim," was the verdict of an Allentown
Coroner's jury.
Samuel Reel, one of Harrlsburg's most
venerable citizens, bas joined tbe silent major
ity, aged 83 years.
A test of endurance between a cake of
handmade ice and one of tbe natural product
has been arranged at Norristown.
Owen Hannan, a brakeman, was killed on
the W. N. Y. & P. road at Cony on Friday.
The remains wore taken to Oil City.
J. E. Harder, of Clearfield, will shortly at
tempt to ride 100 miles a day on a bicycle over
the mountain roads of Lock Haven.
Mrs. P. B. Chiles, of Rlcoville.above Titus
ville, was burned to death while boiling soap
at her home. She was tbe mother ot six chil
dren. For tbe first six months of tbe ourront year
permits wore issued for the construction ot 125
frames and MM briok buildings, at an approxi
mated cost of 318,250.
Dr. A. F. Coops, Dr. I. H. Rltcbey, S. H.
Lamborton and Robert Moore, all prominent
citizens of Oil City, were banqueted Friday
evening prior to their departure for an extended
foreign trip.
The 'Francisco is tbe name of the latest
steamer launcbed on Conneaut Lake abont 82
feet long. She is owned by Albert Huldekoper,
son of Major A. C. Huldekoper, and in a trial
of speed ran away from the fleet sailing Nickel
Plate.
Tho Clumplnn Copper.
From tbe New York Tress, i
Ths policeman who watched a deadly fight
between a storekeeper and a man who bad
robbed the letter's till, and let the thief escape,
deserves a leather medal. He is beyond all
donbt tbe champion copper. . ,
SUNDAY, JULT 18,
THE TOPICALTALKER, .
The Carnegie Library Mattes Progress
Popular Orcau HecliaU-How Abenl
tbe Duqueeno Tbeaterf Gossip and
Comment.
TinnAniAN Stevenson, of tbe Carnegie
Library, Is making good progress with the
equipment of the institution In bis charge.
Tbe formation ot a library Is necessarily slow
work) It requires tbe greatest care, and the de
tails of tho business of buying books are often
bothersome. But Mr. Stevenson is proceeding
methodically and intelligently with bis task,
and tbe library bids fair to have a favorable
beginning. Tbe periodical literature which Is
already at tbe disposal of tbe publlo attracts
larger numbers every day to the library. It is
pleasant to bear tbat tbo LibrarCommlttee
ot Councils Is giving Mr. Stevenson all the as
sistance tbey can.
"The Saturday organ recitals In the Carnegie
Music Hall are evidently appreciated. Yes
terday afternoon the hall was pretty nearly
full tbe audience being almost entirely com
posed of ladles and children. It was pleasantly
cool on the floor ot the hall, but rather warm
in the gallery. Mr. Leonard Wales, the inde
fatigable organist, must have found it pretty
hot work between keys, stops and pedals.
The audience showed a trnly cathollcconsld
eratlonof the musical numbers. The air of
rapt attention which prevailed even among
tbo small children conld not be excelled la
Boston. The Influence of these organ recitals
is certainly good, and should nnder favorable
conditions materially enlarge tho musical con
stituency of Allegheny.
The uncomfortable feature of the Duquesne
theater project Is that it is necessary to in
quire about twice a week if it has climbed the
golden stairs. During the past week the repre
sentatives of Mr. David Henderson have said
emphatically that the theater is to be built as
planned and promised. At the same time there
is no tangible evidence that work of tearing
out and remodeling the interior of the 1 ack
man building is under way. Tbe place is shut
np and wears the air of a mausoleum rather
than a theater.
If the assertions of reliable men and the
statements in the New York papers may be
trusted Manager Henderson has booked a
strong line of attractions for this
season, beginning in tbe first week
In October with the Emma Jnch
Grand Opera Company. Tbat the Duquesne
theater will not be built by October 1 or No
vember 1,1am not prepared to say. Every
theater-goer in Pittsburg hopes it will be, and
it would be a great satisfaction to the publlo if
Manager David Henderson would make a clear
and positive statement of his intentions In the
matter. .
piTTSBUno Is Sot the only city that has in
proipectu anframber of new theaters.
They are springing np in all the Western cities
like plantains in a lawn. New York will have
fire wholly new theaters next season Oscar
llaminerstoln's Murray Hill Theater, on Forty
second street; Ed. Harrlgan's new house, on
Thirty-flftb street; tho Columbus, on West One
Hundredth and Twenty-fifth street; Hormann's
Gaiety, Which was Dookstader's old theater,
but whteh the Professor bas mado entirely now,
and tbe now Madison Squaro Garden Theater,
Brooklyn really a part of tbe great metropo
liswill bare two new theaters.
i
'Tub "United States Mall," George C. Jenks'
faroe comedy, is coming out again this
season undor the best of ausplcos. Mr. Jonks
has re-wrltton the last act, which was rath or
weak, in tbo original production, and touched
up the whole work In many placos. No money
will bo sparod to make It a thing nf beauty so
far as costumes go, and it Is delightfully and
wonderfully certain tbat tbero Is plenty of
money on hand for tbls purpose.
Tbo "U. a Mall will begin its season at tho
Chestnut Streot Tbeator, Philadelphia, Bop
tember 1. with a cast Including the flvo well
known comedians, Frank David, Sam Reed,
Ed J. Connelly, Billy Robinson and Ed Herron,
and Miss Georgia Paiker, Miss Magglo Field
ing, Miss Belle Lynn, Master Harry Lynn, Miss
Marie Bockel and Miss Virginia Ross.
rTHOsn who arn enamored nf tank plays
should begin to save up their money to buy
bouquets for ono tbat is promised us during
the coming season. I am Informed that tbe
play Is called "The Oath." A horse appears in
the play and throws his rider Into a tank ot
water. A largo dog appears, bites tho horse,
who disappears, and then tbe dog, not tbo
horse, plnnges into the tank and rescues tbe
man. Tbe lucky ownors of tbls exquisite
dramatio work have not been revealed to me,
but the enterprising managers who carried "A
Dark Secret" all over the country concealed In
a tank should obtain "The Oath." Perhaps it
is hardly fair to say so, but tbe idlooy of "The
Oath" at first blnsh appears to exceed tbe
lunacy of "A Dark Secret" And tbat is saying
a great deal. Hepburn Johns.
STREET CAB C0UBTESY.
A Few Rales That Should be Observed by
Travelers en All Lines.
When you enter a street car place your par
cel or bag beside you, as it Is entitled to the
room of a passenger.
Always stand on the rear platform of a street
car and chin to tbe conductor about the lady
passengers. It shows your manners.
Sometimes you see a person sitting with one
foot resting upon his knee. This Is not to dis
commode others, but only to protect his corn
patch.
When a lady with a babe in her arms enters a
car don't get up, but bury your head in a news
paper and read between the lines that a woman
who takes a child out for an airing has no busi
ness to get into a crowded street car, as there is
always danger of tbe babe catching mumps or
measles. ,
Always cross your legs while riding In a street
car, particularly if you wear barber-pole socks,
and then the ladles brush the dust from your
shoes as they pass by.
If a lady and gentleman enter a car together
and you are asked to move up a little, don't do
it. It is not necessary that they should sit be
side each other; and the conductor has no
rlehts that you are bound to respect.
Yon can generally tell a dude by tbe size of
his cane. Entering a car he shonld always
carry bis stick under his arm. The ladles bar
ing a care for their optics will notice him more
fervently.
The selfish man always spreads himself out
and reads his paper with stolid Indifference.
To move up a little he might lose the thread of
the subject in hand; therefore, it la best not to
disturb him.
THE FATE OF A TERRAPIN.
A Moss Covered One found Safely Im
bedded In a Piece of Ice.
Greencastle, Ind., July IZ John Cawley,
of this city, has a terrapin In his aquarium
which he acquired in a novel manner. On
breaking open a block of Ice a foot thick the
terrapin was found snugly Imbedded in the
center of it. His back was covered with a
thick growth of moss, and he was apparently
lifeless, bnt revived on being thawed out by
the water. Tho Ice was shipped recently from
Chimgii, and l supposed to have come from
on - of tho lakes in Wisconsin. The terrapin
measures four inches across the back, and is
lively as a crloket.
DEATHS OF A DAY.
Hi J. Gross.
Ex-Eeleet Councilman H. J. Gross, of the
Twentj-flrit "ward, died at his home, 7201 Tioga
street yesterday morning, after a prolonged at
tack or rheumatism. Tbe deceased served two
terms In Select Council, and was defeated for a
third terra by Mr. Fltislmmons. He was an aetlve
member or the Committee on fubllo Works. J ho
deceased was a member of the Jr. '). V. A. M.
and Mystic Chain. Americas Council No. 218, Jr.
O. U. A. M. will hold a special meeting to-day at
4:30 to make arrangements for th funeral, which
takes place to-morrow,
John Geyer.
One of the best known citizens of Allegheny,
John Geyer, died suddenly yesterday morning
from an attack of rheumatism that affected hli
heart. Ue leave! a wire, tbrce ion! and three'
daughter!. Adam Uoyer, a ion, li a well-known
Allegheny fireman, and Detective Johnson and
Offlcor Jtelscber, are ioni-ln-law of the deceased.
Mn. Jnmes R. RlacFarlnnr.
A telegram yesterday announced tbe death of
Mn.James B.MaeFarlane,wlfeof the well-known
Pittsburg attorney, at Towanda. She bad been
visiting her parents there for some time. Uer
death was caused by gastritis. She bad only been
married about two years but bad a host of friends
In flttsbarg.
Da vld Push, SI. P.
London. Jnlylt-Mr. David Pngh, member of
the House of Commons for the Eastern division of
Carmarthenshire, is dead. He was a Liberal, and
layered home rule for Ireland.
1800.
E0W TO FIND IOEBEBQI,
A Now Apparatus That Is Likely le Prove
of Grant Hervloe,
from the New York Times. J
A question filled witb vital interest to ocean
navigation Is this; Is thero no way by which
tbe proximity of an iceberg can be mado known
to masters of vessels other tban by means al
ready tried and found unreliable In thick and
foggyweathorT Moreor less reliance bas been
placed upon search lights, echo Instruments,
and so forth, but tbe tronble with them all is
that they do not act in time to admit of tbe
vessel's course being changed and collision
avoided.
When In the foggy region masters are told
tbat they should look with suspicion upon fog
banks when suddenly appearing, as they have
every reason to believe that an Iceberg is con
cealed, and should slow down for a more care
ful scrutiny. Thinking men have for years
been experimenting for tbe purpose of finding
a reliable iceberg detector, and the latest ap
paratus that bas come into publlo notice has
recently been suggested to the consideration of
practical electricians in England. A thermo
pile and galvanometer are connected together,
the latter graduated In degrees of temperature
for recording the temperature of the surround
ing atmosphere. A. movable contact breaker
is fitted to tbe galvanometer, and tbe breaker
should always be placed at a po Int considerably
below the temperature recor ded by the ther
mometer. A suitable battery and bell-ring alarm com
plete the apparatus. With the recorded ocean
temperatures for a general guide and a little
experience with tbe apparatus tbe best tem
perature point at which to place tbe movable
contact breaker of the galvanometer could be
readily determined. Very naturally tbe lower
it is placed the shorter will be tbe warning, and
vice versa. Its workings wonld be somewhat
like this: The officer on watch, upon noticing
foggy indications, sees tbe thermopile properly
exposed and pointed forward, at the same time
notes the temperature of tbe atmosphere as
shown by the thermometer, and places tbe
movable contact breaker 10 or more below that
point. Tbe vessel continues on her conrse, full
speed, when suddenly tbe alarm bell rings,
which means that the temperature has almost
insUntly fallen 10, and suggests tbat the "fog
bank" conceals an Iceberg. The engines are
slowed, the helm pnt over, and the danger
averted. Tbe searob light can now be brongbt
into play and the dimensions of the berg in
vestigated in order to see in what direction the
vessel can with safety proceed. Should the
idea succeed, the result wonld be of incacul
able valae, and the many disasters due to ice
this year would not be repeated in the future.
A NEWSBOY'S GREAT LUCK.
Ha Whirls Through the Stock Exchange and
Makes a Fortune.
New Yore, July 11 A broker stepped out
of the Broad street door of the Stock Exchange
yesterday, apparently after having made some
money. He espied a little mlteot a ragged
newsboy, not three feet high, and a philan
throphlo notion took possession of blm. He
caught up the little bunch of rags and, carry
ing it to a cigar stand, procured an empty
cigar box. This he placed in tbe dazed boy's
hands.
Then the broker dashed Into tho Exchange
with a wild whoop that dlrectod general atten
tion to him. Instantly ho was surrounded by a
crowd, and Broker Dick Halstead threw a coin
into the box, seized tbo boy, passod him to J.
W. Bsss, wbo also passed him on after dropping
a contribution Into the box. Coins and bills
began to rain into It Tbo Sugar Trust crowd
was Invaded, then tbo New England crowd, and
the pile of money in the box grow rapidly. Tho
yells, tbo sight of tbo money, and tho general
.novelty of bis trip woro boyond tbo little I ol
low's comprehension. Ho simply stared
blankly.
Finally bo was releasod. There must haro
bocn $60 in the box. He shot out of tbo Ex
change aud was last seen running up Nassau
streot hugging tho box tightly to his breast
Who he was. where he lived, or what bo would
do with his fortune no one knew.
current timely topics.
Bak Jones sayis "If I don't got to heaven I
will be one of the worst disappointed men on
earth." Barn's disappointment is going to be
something wonderful to behold.
An Owosso, Mloh., firm advertises a Job lot
of tombstones, and advises people to bnrry np
because there aro only a few of them left. Uers li
a golden opportunity for people about to die to
secure a bargain.
Tun hot weather bas been the means of
kllllnga Chicago book agent while In the set of
selling a book to a deaf and dumb man, Tbls Is
certainly an Insta nee of the survival of tbe fittest.
Many cities tbat clamored for a recount are
now satisfied with the first figures.
JOHN R. McOall will accept the Repub
lican nomination for Governor of Tennessee, bnt
it is unneceissry to state tbat be will never be
called upon to fill the Gubernatorial chair. II
will be a case of called back with Air. McCall.
In about another month'tbe political barrels
will be opened. An Ohio campaign in Pennsyl
vania will be a novelty,
Joseph Shannon, tbe Pennsylvania man,
says the Detroit tree Prttt, wbo was beaten out
of (9,000 by three card monte men, savi he bad
read the trick In tbe papers a hundred times, but
apposed it was something pnt In to fill np on.
He was filled up pretty full, and he will believe
every word In the papers after this.
The peach crop still remains a failure.
Dr. Peters, the explorer, has reached the
coast. For a man who has been murdered as
he has, bis health Is pretty good.
Henry Villabd believes that In fire years
every kind of machinery will bo driven by elec
tricity. Tbls will be direful news for Philadel
phia. Her pace is a utile too rait now.
BHAEE, Wyoming.
The Lodge Force blU, if it should become a
law, will force many Democrats Into retirement
It will alio cost the taxpayers many a dollar.
Out of SO games played, Meadville's ball
tossera have won S. The Allegheny dab can do
almost as well as that.
Bayard, Neb, Is advertising for a good
.shoemaker and a first-class lawyer. Here's a
'chance for a couple of Plttsburgers to go West
and grow up with the country and starve to
death.
Paris, France, will celebrate her natal day
to-morrow. She has resolved to do It in style,
too, and will squander 650,000 francs. It looks as
though Paris had some Pittsburg blood in her
makeup.
AN HUnois youth, 17 years of age, while
drunk, tried to drive his horse over a high trestle.
His funeral took place two days afterward, and
his bone bad to be shot to pat it out of misery,
THE Fresno, Cal., Republican, says with
emphasis: Correspondents are requested not to
write on colored paper, such as the backs of
dodgers or brown wrapping paper with gobs or
butter and sbredi of beelsteak on the reverse side.
The printers can't read it and the editor won't.
MAYOR Creqier suggests that Chicago se
cure a floating morgue. In the language of Mc
Glnty, what'i the matter with her preient oner
The meanest thief on record halls from
Lyons, 111. He entered the residence of an editor
and secured several hundred dollars' worth of
valuables. He is probably the only editor In ex
istence tbat had so many valuable! concealed in
his house, and he will not be guilty of It again.
IN the new German Reichstag 23 editors will
hold down chairs. The pen Is playing an Import
ant part In foreign countries these days.
General Boulanoer is writing a drama.
If he Is to be the star and the star dies In the first
act, he has not lived in vain.
A SLIGHT MISTAKE.
rWBlTTIX TUB TUB SISrATOH.1
What dreams of love are in her eyes,
What worlds or sweetness on her llpst
What power to rnle my fond heart lies
Within those rose-pink finger tips!
There's magic in that nodding plume
No knlghtller crest was prondller worn,
And what a witching, sweet perfume
Is from her dainty garments borne I
Tbe snowy game about her throat
Charms and love philters sure must screen,
And In her quilted petticoat
Are stitched strange runes and spells, I ween.
Uhe irowns, she smtlei-ah, wealtab, bliss I
Alas, for mo Indeed 'tis woel
For when I sought to steal a kiss
She floored me with a sndden blow!
A sadden blow npon my face
Has freed me from her magic toll;
For I've been trying to embrace
. My grest-great-grandmadone in oil.
' ' ANXIB LOCUS BBAKZNBXBOX,
MURRAY'S MUSINGS,
The' Talk About SJabwaye and Elevated
Bldiwalks In Nvr York Pood Actually
Destroyed la lbs Preissoe of Btarvstleo
-Fakes About Actors and Actrssaei,
trjiou a itavf coanzsronDZKT.J
Tna crowded condition of this great city was
somewhat relieved by tbe elevated roads,
but its rapid growth in the last 10 years has re
duced its original rapid transit Idea to tbe level
of a mere makeshift unequal to tbe present
necessity. The elevated roads claim to carry
over half a million people dally. Tbese people
climb up and down 60 to 70 feet of stairway
each, or a total ot some 30,000,000 feet to enjoy
the privilege of transportation. Yet the horse
cars are taxed to their utmost, and notwith
standing tbese means ot local travel tbe streets
In tbe lower city are fairly choked with pedes
trians. Tbe trucks, ears and carriages in the streets,
and skids and boxes that encumber the side
walks make life burdensome to the latter
class. Tbey also make life and whole limbs
uncertain. To tbe visitor tbe situation is one
of constant terror. Ho accepts no chances.
Tbe consequence is he rarely gets hurt It is
the New Yorker born and bred who gets
knocked down, run over and dragged oft to
the hospital. Snch accidents happen every
day, and average three deaths or cripples per
day from those causes alone. I donbt whether
tbe great city ot London, where pedestrians
have no rights in the streets, and do not ex
pect any consideration from drivers, can show
such an alarming ratio of accidents of this
character. Pei haps the proverbial careless
ness of Americans when it is a question of life
and limb has something to do with It.
Whether so or not. It is certain that some
means mnst soon be provided to escape tbe
slaughter and maiming of 1,000 victims annu
ally, or more than are sacrificed in tbe same
time by all the railroads In the country put to
gether. This little matter ot stair-climbing has more
to do with tbe subject tban any other one
thing. Most people in active life would prefer
to take numberless chances of being knocked
down and run over to climbing np one pair of
stairs. There are many reasons in favor of
elevated sidewalks, and but tbls single forcible
reason of stairs against it. With an under
ground railway system (combined with which
would be the general subway for steam pipes,
gas, wires, etc.,) and the elevated sidewalks In
tbe more crowded section. New York would
probably add another 600 000 souls to her popu
lation in tbe next decade and never feel tbe
pressure. The proposed sidewalks are de
signed to run along the' level of secong floors
and to be constructed lightly of wrought iron
and glass. By means of these pedestrians be
tween tbe elevated trains and ferries would be
spared going up and down stairs, this momen
tary leaping of Skids and boxes and tbe immi
nent danger of being run over at street cross
ings. As to shopkeepers and wholesalers, it
would be just as easy and much more conveni
ent for them to hare their main retail door, or
counting rooms, on the second floor, leaving
tbe lower story for -heavy goods, packing and
snipping.
s e
Ladles and the Street Cars.
pBOSC every day metropolitan life: Two ladles
on a Broadway curb beckoning frantically to
street car driver.
Driver: "Well, come on, nowl Wot are yees
doln there? Expect me to bring de care over?"
Waste Hand la Hand With fttarvntlon.
plVE thousand pounds of blueflsb per day
have been carried out and dumped in the
bay anting tbe past week, owing to a glntted
market On ono of tbese days a riot of starv
ing workingmtn was in progress, and every day
men and women jumped Into the rlver.or ended
tbelr lives in some other way, because they had
nothing to eat. A month or two ago two ship
loads of early vegotablos were thus carried out
to sea and thrown away. At tbe samo tlino
thero were at least 220,000 peeple in tbls city wbo
bad not tasted an early vegetable except as thoy
extracted it from a curbstone ilopbarrel and
eould not afford to buy vegetables at the
market rates. Tbese vegetables bad been ship
ped from tbe South and arrtvod bere to find
tbe conditions of tbo New York market tbo
same as flsbormen found tbem.
Tbls wholesale destruction of food, under all
tbo circumstances, marks us for savages rather
tban a civilized community. I doubt whether
even savages ever were guilty of such inhu
manity. When the ship-loads ot vegetables
were being thrown overboard outside of tbe
bar we bousebolders were paying tbe highest
prices for everything In that line. While these
fish are bolng destroyed by the thousands we
have been unable to buy a blueflsb for less
lan w pay ror good beer.
Whyf I'll tell you. It is because tbe New
York markets are controlled by tbe worst ring
of human sharks that ever went about on
earth without fear of the halter. Tbls combine
which operates to sbut oft tbe food supply is
beyond compare. Every member of It ought to
be indicted for the murder of those who have
died here from starvation.
a
In Opposition to the Resorts.
Qtr the big front door of an unfashionable
church nptown: 'This Church Open All
Bummer."
st
Mado Oat of Whole Cloth.
TT Is a popular supposltlon,based on the yarns
of New York correspondents, tbat certain
handsome and popular actors are besieged
with love letters and other attentions from
stage-struck .society women. Never was a
greater mistake. The masber actor never
mashes anything above tbe social grade of serv
ant girls and abandoned women. Of these be
numbers scores of captives. Tbe society
woman of New York bas no higher opinion of
an actor tban she has of a negro minstrel.
Relegate all future stories of tbls sort to the
limbo of "unimportant, if true." along with tbe
absurd yarns about actresses having diamonds
set into their front teetb, and the others,
equally ridiculous, about' fashionable women
carrying gin cocktails or pony brandies con
cealed about their persons, etc I presume
there are people wbo believe everything tbey
see in print, bnt it would seem politic not to
Eress this small and decreasing minority too
ard.
Honesty of the Short-Haired People.
A ccordino to all accounts, Messrs. John L.
" Sullivan, Billy Muldoon, Jake Kiiraln,
Mike Donovan, Mike Cleary, et aL, leading
lights of the fistic world, present a curious
mixture of treachery, cowardice and brutality.
They dare not trust each other except where
honesty coincides with present personal Inter
est. In my opinion, tbe law ought to be very
lax when one of tbese fellows is fought to an
earthly finish in the ring.
s
The Fourth In Gotham.
THE loveliest view of the Glorious Fourth
was from tbe dock of a Hudson river
steamer from 9 till 10 o'clock at night Tbe
Jay Gonlds who line the eastern shore for 23 or
SO miles out of town gave the most elaborate
private exhibitions at their country seats In
tbe evening. As far as the eye could reach an
almost unbroken line of sky rockets
rose from either shore, and the twinkling of
10,000 Roman candles, the roaring of fire
balloons, and tbe glare and flash of countless
colored lights were reflected on the broad
bosom of the American Rhine. The disagree
able features of noise and malodorous powder
were eliminated. By-tbe-by, the little common
firecracker sells now for a nickel a paouage.
When 1 was a boy. "befo' de wah." we used to
pay 10 cents a package for tbat variety. But
they were better crackers, rarely m!sed fire,
and made more noise to the cubic Inch. Tbe
New York boy who Invested big money In the
new 60-cent crackers, which are as big as an
old-fashioned rolling pin, was a terror to out
lying villages where he had to go to Are them
off.
Beer With Your Music.
Madison Square Garden reminds me tba
this is the only country 1 know ot wherein
it Is considered a sin to have beer with your
music. It is a fact worth mentioning now and
then just to show ourselves bow good we are.
In the hot pursuit of virtue and morality we
manage to get a good deal of law on tbe statute
books designed to suppress or regulate a class,
but which seriously and unnecessarily Inter
feres with tbe most ordinary exercise of per
aonaljudgment and liberty I remember when
tbe Common Council of my native town was
endeavoring to suppress Sabbath breaking, it
passed an ordinance tbat made it line or im
prisonment to play fast muslo In any private
house on tbat day within tbe city limits. This
was to suppress the Polish element that, having
been first shut oat Of any publlo placo. Insisted
on private jamboreos at tbtir homes on Sunday
nlgbts. wherein beer and muslo flowed In sym
pathetic numbors. Tbe ordinance at tbe same
time reached every private household and made
every lady with a piano a law-breaker liable to
arrest.
In tbo same way the New York authorities.
In tbelr effort to suppress the Bowery and
other dives, declared It against law and moral
ity to sell beer where there was musical or
dramatic entertainment. But to prevent too
far-reaching, a proviso was made drawing the
line at a drop-curtain. Tbo Koster and Blat
popular variety gets around tbe drop-curtain
clause with a huge fan tbat rtses up at the foot
lights and serves tbe purpose. It is also said
tbat a large sum of money in bard cash
smoothed over this case. The place has liter
ally coined money through this privilege. The
same privilege is now being sought for the new
Madison Square Garden. It is tbe hope of the
nervous stockholders ot tbat expensive place.
Jt may be sad for some people to associate beer
with Straws and think of Rhine and Wagner
in the same divine relation, but these facts are
just off the tee. .,
' Charles T. Mubbay.
' New Yobs, July 12.
CDHIOUS CONDENSATIONS.
Nockamlxon township, Bucks county,
boasts of a four-legged dues, which uses tbem
alt in a way that I a sight to see.
A Bangor, Me., woman was taken sick
on tbe cars. Tbe car was switched off on a
side track and left there by tht train.
Mrs. Eva B. Hart, who died near
Syracuse, N. Y recently at the reputed age ot
113, smoked as far back as htr children can
rtmember.
A Washington attorney offered to get
the editor of tbe Charlotte, Micb Irioune a
pension. The odltor was ten years old when
tht war broke out.
A 12-year-oId girl living at Croswell
Mich"., fell into a butter crock, in which there
were but four incbta of water and was drowned
before help reached her.
A WatervlUe, Me., man was placed in
tbe lockup for being drunk; When be awoke
In tbe morning; be discovered that he had been
sleeping witb a corpse all night.
Waterville is proud of several things,
among tbem a lady's orchestra, in which the
little fiddle, the big fiddle and tbe horn are all
manipulated harmoniously by maidens young
and fair.
"Daisy," the veteran war-horse which
carried Captain William A. Hill, of Boston,
through the" battles ot Gettysburg and An
tietam.dled on Monday. The horse was 84
years old.
Flies lit on a horse at Lapier, Mich.,
and when the owner tried to drive them away
tbe horse kicked him in tbe face, smashing his
nose and bruising bis face. He will be disfig
ured for life.
John McGlynn, a shoemaker of Kings
ton, suffering from an abscess on the neck,
died suddenly on Sunday evening. At noon
he said to bis wife: "I want a good dinner; if I
do die I don't want to die hungry."
On an uptown street in Philadelphia
there are six houses adjoining each other in
which tbe wives are all sisters. Tbe last was
married a month ago, and last week secured
the house adjoining those of her sisters.
A Cameron, Mo., woman employed a
neighbor woman to do the family whipping for
her, and after the job had been done in a thor
oughly artistic manner, she brought suit
against her substitute for cruelty to animals.
A mathematician announces to an ex
pectant world that two persons playing domi
noes ten hours a day and making four moves a
minute, could continue 113,000,000 years without
exhausting all tbe combinations of the game.
Manlstique bas an aqueous volcano, a
spring 230 feet wide and 400 feet long. Tbe
water and sand boll np from a depth of 63 feet
and throw the little lake into conical shape.
It supplies a creek 20 teet wide and 2 feet dtep
tbe year around.
A remarkable invention bas been made
in Austria, whereby the serious effects of rail
way collisions aro prevented. Glass tubes pro
ject before the train, and If tbey are broken by
an obstacle an electric movement is applied to
tbe brakes, bringing the train immediately to a
standstill.
Major Thomas W. Harwood, who was
101 years old last March, bas arrived at Bath,
Me., from Brooklyn, N. Y where ha passed
tbo winter. He was one ot Bath's first ship
builders. Ho drove his own team down town,
walked up a flight of stairs without any assist
ance and transacted some business.
A farmer sear St. Louis has a nest of
owls in bis barn, and tbey keop It free from
rats and mice. The birds lay up provisions at
night for tbe next day. The farmer marked
tbe bodies of tbe mice be found by cutting off
ono foot with a pair ot scissors. At nightfall
tbo marked mice would be gono. and tbo next
morning tbero would be a fresh supply.
Ono afternoon of last week Gertrude
Pollack, of Klamath county, Ore., left home to
hnnt for somo stray cows. While passing
through a wood sho came face to face with a
bear. Uortruds set her dogs to tree tht bear,
while sbe went home for a rifle. Tht dogs aid
tbelr duty, and when tbe plucky girl reischtd
tbe tree she killed tbe bear at tbt first shot.
A courageous woman In Galesburg,
Mich., heard burglars downstairs the other
night Bbe shouldered a gun, cautiously slipped
below, and, before tht men knew what was
Solm: on. tbey stood looking into the black
eptbs ot the weapon. She thereupon called
for help and now bas tbe rascals in jail await
ing trial.
Patsy Mitchell, of Thompsonrille,
Mass., promised tbat be would never drink
another drop of liquor "as long as be had hair
on bis head." When his thirst became so un
governable be sold his busny bead ot hair to
Bod Crumby, a barber, for a pint of gin. and
when his hair was removed with a razor and
tho gin in his possession be went off and got
drunk.
"Mrs. Obed Raymond," reports the New
Bedford Standard, "started to drive a cat out
of ber chicken yard recently, when tbe door
swung to and tbe animal, seeing no means of
egress, sprang at Mrs. .Raymond, and a lively
tussle ensued, resulting in tbe death of tbe cat,
Mrs. Raymond's arm was so badly lacerated
tbat a physician was called to dress the
wounds."
W. H. Record, of Palatka, hasan inter
esting souvenir of the surrender of Vicksburg.
It is a ring made ot tbe tree under which Gen
erals Grant and Pemberton met to arrange
terms for tbe surrender. The tree stood nearly
midwav between tbe hostile lines, which were
about 70 yards apart. It was carried away root
and branch literally by the Union soldiers.
FUNNY MEN'S FANCIES.
WBITTIN YOB THI DISPATCH.
Climatic Intelligence. "How do you like
the change in the weather?"
1 Have to like It, I reckon. It's the only change
I've got." Alex. S.Swtit.
Not Very Robust "Our postman is as
thin as a match."
"I've noticed It. I actually mistook him for a
walking mateb the other day." CarlyU Smith.
Happened in New York. Salvation
Army Man My friend, are yoo prepared to die?
Man From Texas Welt I can't say as I am, bnt
I've lived down on tbe KIo Grande so long tbat I
reckon I'm pretty well acclimated. Altx, B.
Sweet.
TVnnnmir i Wealth. Smithers It's a
wonder to me that Queen Victoria lives so long.
W liners nojt onos ery ucai.uj.
Bmlthers-I know tbat but it costs so much to
live too know. Utnry Uareourt,
Reason Enough. "Have you read the
Critique of rure Season?' "
"None."
"Why don't you?"
"Kant." Chalmondtly Barcottrt.
No Fun in Lire. "Oh, I bate flats!"
said little Lota Yanntleroy, after be and his
mother had lived in an "apartment" for a week.
"Why Cedrlck?" asked dearest.
"Cause there ain't no bannister to slide down
when you've gat your velvet pants on."
TICKLE PHYLLIS TO STREPHON STRAPPED.
'Tis true, O Strephon, I have loved you
long;
But. surely, now that yon have come from court
Shorn or those graces iweet that made you
strong
The stocks, and shares, and bonds that made you
"long"
Thy quondam Phyllis, Strephon, doth no wrong.
If sbe perchance declines to love you short.
John Ktndrlck Bangs,
THERE ARE SUCH WOU EN.
He Did you read this horrible story?
She-No, what Is it about?
He-A married woman got Into a rage at the
breakfast table and hurled a cup at her husband.
Bhe-I daresay he did something to deserve It.
Did she hit blm?
Ue-I should lay sbe hit him. Tba cup was
solverrd to pieces, and one of tbe fragments
struck ber husband in the neck, severing the Ju
gular vein and causing almost Instant death. Tbe
paper says that tbt shrieks of the unfortunate
woman could be beard for blocks when she real
ised the nature of the disaster.
She-No wonder. I daresay the broken cap be
longed to her new china set. Altx JS. Swsst.
MISUNDERSTOOD.
"Thanks, madam," said the tramp, "1
have seen better "
Ob, yes!" sbe answered, a little Impatiently,
that Is what you alt say. You have all seen bet
ter days, of course 1"
"You wrong me. madam," he proceeded, as he
took another bite of tbe pit which she had given
him.' "I did not Intend to make so trite an ob
servation as that. I was about to say. if you will
permit me to finish my remark now, tbat I have
seen better pie. However, you need not let that
disturb you, as I have not a hypercritical appe
tite in such warm weather as we are having at
present, anyway,"
She called the dog, bat that animal had slunk oS
behind the smokehouse, and the gentleman with
tht pie lifted bti hat and took a dlgnlfltd depart-ure.-Pci
Bvalpi. ,
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