!
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"
Mini
THE DISPATCH will soon begin the publica
tion of a Department of Original Fitn, to be
written by about a score ot tbe Leading IlQ
morists of the country.
tt will not be tho monotonous work of one
pen, but will represent the best efforts of tbe
most Successful "funny men" of tbe American
press, and In Variety, Freshness and Quality
will be tbe most nnique and interesting comic
column published by any newspaper.
Among those secured as contributors arc:
ALEX. . BWEET, of Texas BirTiNOS, whose
reputation, both in this country and in
K u rope, has brought him a fortune.
SAM. T. CLOVER, 'who made the Dakota
Hell known to fame, and whose brilliant
fusillade of Terse now appearing on the
editorial pace of the Chicago HERALD is
not excelled by any similar work.
B. W. FOBS, the genius of the Yankee
Blase, whose delightful dialect poems are
tbe best of their kind and are copied and
recopled Into every paper in the country.
POLS SWAIPS, "whose versatility and origi
nality hare made half a dozen reputa
tions." SAMUEL HIHTTJRN PECK, the author of
"Cap and Bells," whose comic muse is aptly
described as a "delicate Ariel a tricksy
Puck, that strikes one across the eyes with
a branch of dew-wet blossoms, and laughs
from under clustering curls at the little
start one gives in recognition of its surprise
aud sweetness."
J. A. MACON, of Puck, who made an enviable
name as ft contributor to the Century's
"Bric-a-Brac"andhois one of the few
writers who understand and can interpret
the humor of the Southern negro.
MADELINES. EHIDQES, who enjoys the rep
utation of being tbe leading comic verse
writer of her sex in this country.
BESSIE CHANDLER, whoe charming rers de
societe in the Century, Life and other
publicatiens has created a wide demand for
her work.
ETA WILDER MctlLASBON, who is rapidly
coming to tbe front as one of the few
women who can write good humor.
W. J. LAMFTON, "Judge Waxem," who made
tbe Washington Critic quotable, and who
is now dolhg tbe same thing for the Wash
ington Stab.
JOEN KENDRICK EANGS, who supplies the
fun for Harper's Bazar, the EroCH, eta
PADLPASTNOR, the well-known comedian of
the Burlington FREE PRESS.
EENRY CLAY IUKEKS, who scars ago made
the New York Setts a most welcome "ex
change." THE MUCH-QUOTED "PUNNY MEN" of
tbe Somerville Journal and tbe Rome
Eentinel; E. S. Hopkins, of JUDGE and
others.
$jje Bi&wtftfj.
ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8. 1848.
Vol. 43, No. 84 EntereC at Pittsburg I'ostofflce.
November 14. 1T, as second-class matter.
Business Office Corner Smithfleld and
Diamond Streets.
News Booms and Publishing House 75,
77 and 79 Diamond Street.
Eastern Advertising Office, Koom 40, Tribune
llulldlng. New York.
THE DISPATCH is regularly on sale at
Jlrentano's, 5 Union Square, Jfew York, and
17 Ave. de tOpcra, Paris, France, and IS
Strand, liondon, Eng uherc anyone who
has been disappointed at a hotel neurs stand
can obtain it.
TElUls OF THE DISPATCH.
PORTAGE TT.EI IS THE EXITED STATES.
JIAILT Dispatch, One Year. f 8 00
DAILY Dipfatch, l'er Quarter joo
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Daily UierATcn, lnclodingbunday, lyear. 3000
Daily Dispatch, Inelndingbunday.Sm'ths. ISO
Daily Dispatch, Including bunday.lmonth so
bCNDAY DisrATCH. One Year 150
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Iue Daily Dispatch is delivered bycarrlersat
IJcenuoer week, or Including Sunda) edition,
at SO cents per week.
PITTSBURG. FRIDAY. MAY 2, 1890.
3-The BUSINESS OFFICE of THE DIS
PATCH hat been removed to Corner of
Smiihfield and Diamond Streets.
LABOR'S MAY DAY.
The first of May labor demonstration
passed off more calmly than was generally
expected. In this country the eight-hour
movement wjs quietly inaugurated with the
variety of success reported iu our tele
graphic columns. In Europe the Socialist
labor demonstration was generally un
attended by the disorders which were gen
erally expected, and which some ot the
governments did their best to provoke.
The eight-hour movement in this country,
so far as the first day is concerned, shows a
rather broken front, This seems to be due
to a reasonable disposition on tbe part of
the men, in various cities, to make what
they regard as satisfactory compromises.
Cases are reported in which the settlement
of the question on eight-hours' work for
eight-hours' pay, was easily accomplished.
Others turn no where the workingmen
seemed to prefer to settle on the basis ot
nine hours' work, some of them at ten hours'
pay and some at nine. Such things are
gains for labor; but when the last class of
settlements, together with the cities which
have not joined in the movement, seems to
outnumber the first, it does not indicate
much progress in the way of establishing a
uniform ei;ht-hour day.
The demonstration in Europe was not, of
conrse,so quiet, but to American ideas it does
not show any such tendency to disorder as
was anticipated. The press dispatches,
taken from Government sources in Europe,
evince a determined disposition to put the
labor organizations in the wrong; but it
does not require much looking below the
surface to see that the workingmen, not
withstanding the policy of Government offi
cials to arrest right and left, kept the peace
with great forbearance under the circum
stance. It is clear that the suppressive
measures were entirely out of proportion to
the attempts at disorder.
On the whole Labor Day was not discred
itable to the working masses. It would be
difficult to say as much lor the tremulous
Governments who made such a fuss over it.
A CKED1TAULE SETTLEMENT.
The part which Pittsburg had in Labor
Day was to receive the announcement of
the settlement of the railroad yardmen's
wages. The settlement is a virtual adoption
of the course which The Dispatch has
constantly urged, namely, a reasonable
compromise in which each side concedes
something to the other. This is much bet
ter than letting such a dispute drift into a
strike, and it is creditable to both sides. As
the form in which the demands of the men
were first presented produced an idea that
they were taking a peremptory and arbi
trary course, it is no more than just to say
that they have shown moderation and pa
tience throughout, and that the final settle
ment is dne to the liberal concessions which
they have made. This dears the atmosphere
of Pittsburg of all important wages dis
putes until the iron question comes up in
June,
NOT TO RE TRUSTER.
A remarkable example of the trash which
can be imposed on people who ought to
know better, in the way of reported trusts
.and combination, is formed by a colnmn
& Article in the Xew York Herald giving the
plans of which is called "a gigantic trust
of agriculturists" which is to have a cap
ital ol ?50,000,000, is to regulate the price of
grain, and is to ruiu the speculators.
The foundation for this report is that a
man in Chicago has taken out incorpora
tion papery for "The Farmers Co-operatlvn
Brotherhood of the United States," author
ized capital 550,000,000. To this he invites
the farmers subscribe, at the rate of 550 per
share, and when he gets his J50.000.000 he
intends to do great things. He proposes to
buy up the entire grain crops of the country
if the farmers wish to sell, or if they do not,
the "Co-operative Brotherhood" will loan
the farmers four-filths of the value of their
crops. The farmers are to be bound to sell
their grain Only to the Brotherhood, which
will bnild elevators all over the country and
take the entire business of handling the
grain crops in its own hands. On the some
what inconsequent statement that this beau
tilul scheme will increase the price that the
farmers get for their grain, those long suffer
ing victims of patent-rights notes, gold
bricks, and seed-oats swindlers are invited
to send in their subscriptions and one dollar
apiece to the inventor oi tnis wonderiul
incorporation.
There is nothing especially remarkable in
the fact that human crookedness should de
vise such a plan for extracting one dollar
apiece or more from oil the gudgeons who
can be deceived into thinking there is
something in it, or that some victims should
be fleeced by it. But that a paper of national
reputation should be gulled into publish
ing an advertisement of such a Scheme as a
serious' project, without reflecting upon
some obvious facts, is a remarkable exam
ple. The first is that even if the $50,000,000
capital were not an entirely imaginary
sum, it is worth while to compare it with
the work that it is proposed to undertake.
It expects to control the wheat crop of the
United States. Tbe only way to control the
wheat crop is to buy it all; which by the
time that the wheat is stored or marketed
calls for the neat capital of four hundred in
stead of fifty millions. It proposes to do the
same thing with the corn crop; which takes
a bagatelle of five or six hnndred millions
more. This precious story is published in
utter ignorance on the part of the paper
giving it publicity that the capital en
gaged in the work which this Co-operative
Brotherhood proposes to undertake, is
I somewhere in the vicinity of a thousand
million dollars.
Hardly less shallow is the idea that be
cause a scheme proposes the utterly impossi
ble task of becoming the sole buyer of farm
products in the United States the farmers
are to be benefited by it. If it were not
too silly a thing to bike seriously, it might
be pointed out that tbe Standard Oil Com
pany has frequently been the sole buyer of
crude petroleum without any special benefit
to the producers, and that if this company
conld by any stretch of the imagination be
supposed to handle any grain, it must
take whatever prices the grain will bring in
the markets of the world, and can only en
hance its profits by depressing the price paid
to the farmers.
Ofcourseitis waste time to argue the
possibility of this scheme ever going any
further than to absorb whatever remittances
may be sent to it by deluded subscribers to
its stock. The farmers have often been de
rided for their liability to be taken by the
schemes of confidence men, but when a
metropolitan newspaper permits its
columns to be used in booming such a
shallow game as"a trust of agriculturist!, "its
editors should be placed under guardian
ship to protect them from the wiles of gen
tlemen with interests in lottery drawings, or
with friends whose drafts have to be cashed
in order to pay Imperative and unex
pected bills.
TAXATION AND KOADS.
The Dispatch's road expedition has in
its exploration over the stony roads of
Clarion connty developed the existence
there of the strong feeling which is likely
to be tbe obstacle to tbe support of a
thorough system of road improvement by
the agricultural classes. That is the belief
that the farmers cannot stand the increased
taxation necessary to carry out the work as
it is outlined.
There is no doubt that this objection
would have much effect if it were pro
posed to make every agricultural district
bring its highways to a state of perfection
at once. But it is to be remembered that
while there are various propositions to
lessen the cost to the farmers by State aid,
and bv other means, every intelligent view
of the subject must recognize that the work
will be a gradual one. It took centuries for
the old Soman roads to be built. It has taken
centuries for England and the continent
to bring their modern highways to their
present perfection. The United States
should move faster than the Old World;
but if a plan were adopted now for gradual
and steady work, we might regard it as a
success if it gave ns solid highways by the
middle of the next century. The movement
may bring relief to the present generation
by the construction of central highways in a
few years; but it should be understood that
it we commence road building in earnest, it
will be for our children and children's
children.
Such work can be commenced without any
onerons increase of taxation. Even if the
present road taxes were energetically and
scientifically employed in making tbe roads
solid And enduring, little by little, the first
steps could be taken toward a final system
of solid highways.
TBE MILITARY BURDEN.
An example of the military distrust
which pervades Europe is afforded by the
uneasiness felt in German military circles
over the fact that notwithstanding all
efforts the army of Trance continues to ex
ceed that of Germany by 40,000 men; while
the field artillery of France is some 800 guns
the larger. This is inciting the Imperial
Government to every effort to increase its
army. But as tbe Constitution of the Ger
man empire limits the conscription to one
per cent of the population it is apparent
that the attempt to go beyond that limita
tion will be difficult, if not dangerous. Per
haps the reported offer to neutralize
Alsace and Lorraine is not so purely disin
terested and philanthropic as it looks at
first sight,
SPOILS Y. CONSTITUTION.
In discussing the proposition to give
every Congressman a clerk, a private secre
tary at the expense of the Government, Mr.
Butterworth, of Ohio, the other day gave a
very strong evidence of the way in which
practical politics induce Congressmen to
neglect their constitutional dnties:
"I have voted for it over and over again, be
cause I know that if I bad one I would be worth
310,000 a year more to my constituents than I am
now. Ibavetogo tramp, tramp, tramp from
department to department, looklog after pen
sions, looking after places, looking after every
thing else on tbe fare of the earth except tbe
business for which I am sent here."
The most painstaking search of the Con
stitution, of the United States fails to dis
close any provision calling upon C6ngress-
men to tramp from department to depart
ment looking after pensions or anything
else. On the other hand, there will be found
very decided provisions contemplating that
Congressmen shall attend to their legislative
duties, which they Cannot do if they are run
ning errands foroffice-holders. The decision
of practical politics is that the constitu
tional duties of Congressmen must be left
undone, rather than that the spoils shall be
left unattended to. This may partly ex
plain the ability of our statesmen to keep up
a six months' session without transacting
any business worth mentioning.
Would it not be well for the people to
elect a class of Congressmen who will place
their constitutional duties above the de
mands of place hunters, and let the spoils
men do their own tramping, while the legis
lators stay in the House attending to the
duties of their position?
A enterprising engineer has been
fonnd who proposes to blow up the North Pole
with dynamite, in the expectation that tbe
destruction of the frigid axis will give tbe
vicinity ronnd about a climate ot equable and
mild temperature. The New York JFbrirJ jeers
at the proposition. Its experiments with blow
ing up the tall poles of politics has convinced
it that the effect is to produce the extremes of
either torrid temperature or chilling and frozen
silence.
If the President intends to preserve the
Surplus by vetoing public building bills be will
have to borrow Clarkson's ax and keep It going
as indnstriously as the champion beadsman of
the administration has done.
Govfbnor Eagle, of Arkansas, does
not take much stock in tbat California story
about tbe aasassiu of Clayton. He told tbe
Congressional committee yesterday, frankly
and sensibly, that he believes tbe men who
stole tbe ballot-box at Flulnmerville murdered
the dead candidate. Tbe frankness may to a
certain extent condone tbe failure to Catch the
murderers.
The new saloons are in fall operation,
as the local reports of all the papers have duly
informed us within the past 21 hours. As to
what tbe speak-easies are doing, reports are
not in yet.
The discovery in a bookstore at Hart
ford that Bibles are sold at a dollar add the
"Orations and After-Dinner Speeches of
Chauncr M. Depew" at two dollars and a half
indicates tbat tbe corporate theory of fixing
tbe price of commodities or services solely by
value to the consumer.does not work in respect
to the publications of a corporate magnate.
Chicago Is oppressed by the simultaneous
discovery that tbe World's Pair contract is a
big undertaking and tbat her baseball team
cannot play ball.
Thebe is a suspicion floating around the
atmosphere that tbe readiness of the Congress
men to pass almost any kind of silver legisla
tion, is based on heir willingness to let Presi
dent Harrison sbonlder the odium of a veto.
The Congressmen are able to give Major Joey
Bagstock points in the art of being "devilish
sly."
The Neville Island railroad rises like the
Phoenix 1mm tbe ashes of the former organiza
tion and Is announced to be a certainty this
time.
It is now remarked that Alfred the Great
originated the eight-hour system by assigning
one-third of bis day to work, one-third to prayer
and stndy and one-third to sleep. If the work
lngmen follow his example in all respects there
will be a decided Improvement oi society.
When the United States courts get hold
of It, there Is a danger that electrical execution
will be the slowest death on record.
Reserve township now has the oppor
tunity to become tbe Fourteenth ward of Alle
gheny. If that could raise it to the rank of the
Fourteenth ward of Pittsburg it would be the
great speculation of the lives of the Reserve
township property-owners.
The Waterbury clocks are about tbe
only organizations going tbat are not striking
for eight honrs a day.
The Tammany people who were charged
with bribery and stealing now say that on sober
second thought they are inclined to treat the
sworn testimony with silent contempt. That is
the wisest and most discreet course to take it
the charges are true.
PEOPLE OF PEOMmEffCE.
Miss Mildred Lee, daughter of the late
Robert E. Lee, is a favorite In the best social
circles of Washington.
Dr. Small, President of Colby University,
will to-morrow address the graduating class of
Newton Theological Seminary at commence
ment. CnAPMAu Coleman, First Secretary of the
American Legation at Berlin, is engaged to
marry Miss Hendricks, a rich girl of Frank
fort. Ky.
Phot. Borden P. Bowne, LL.D., Dean of
the School of All Sciences, Boston University,
will deliver the alumni oration this year at
Pennington Seminary, on June 25.
OF Hon. Robert C. Winthrop, who is on his
annual visit to Washington, it is remarked that
no one preceives any change in him. He bids
fair to rival Bancroft In the vigor of his age.
Francis Kawle, of Philadelphia, has been
nomlnatea by tbe Committee of tbe Alumni as
an overseer of Harvard University. The over
seers are elected by tbe alumni on commence
ment day.
It costs the city SIM to board Mrs. James A.
Flack at tbe Vanderbilt Hotel from March 9 to
IS, while ber husband's trial was in progress.
Mrs. Flack's personal expenses were tfil 15,
and the officers contracted the rest of the bill.
Mrs. Garfield Is now 53 years old. She is
somewhat stouter than of old, and her hair is
whiter than in tbe days of her Washington
life. She is said to look prettier in her mourn
ing costumes than In tbe brighter colors that
she used to wear.
At the baptism of the infant son of Mr. and
Mrs. John Dablgren, at St. Matthew's, in
Washington this week, Cardinal Gibbons was
tbe godfather, and Miss Lily Rosecrans (who is
soon to marry Governor Toole, of Montana)
was the godmother.
The people ot Savannah were much im
pressed, during bis recent visit, with the fact
that tbe Hon. Thomas F. Bayard has on his
visiting card neither his first name, nor his ad
dress, nor bis age, weight, height, occupation,
religion, nationality, sex, color or previous con
dition of servitude; nothing, in fact, but "Mr.
Bayard."
The American Minister to Austria andgMrs.
Grant recently gave an interesting reception to
a score ot Indians who had just arrived at
Vienna to join a "Wild West" show. Among
the company invited to meet these peaceable
savages were Prince Beuss (tbe German Am
bassador and Princess Reuss, Sadoullah Pacha
(the Turkish Ambassador), M. Mazel (the
Dutch Minister) and Prince Henry Licbten
stein, The Woodilck nnd It Actions,
From the Homer (Col.) Index.
The horrible woodtick has resurrected him
self from winter quarters, and is now ready for
business. They catch a man "right where he
live," and make him thoroughly miserable. It
is said that a daily bath in bacon grease or bam
fat will keep tbem off. A'dope of coal tar and
brimstone Is also an effective setback to them;
but tbe best way to curtail their flesh-burrowing
proclivities is to put tbem on an anvil, and fan
them with a ten-pouud hammer.
A Plllable Spectacle.
From tbe Philadelphia Inquirer.
The pitiable spectacle is presented in New
Jersey of a Republican Senate committee try
ing to disclose Democratic election frauds in
Hudson county, and a Democratic Honso com
mittee trying to unearth Republican frauds in
Atlantic county, while each defends the
scoundrels on Its own side of tbe partisan
fence. If they were honest they would unite to
punish tho corruptlonists of both sides.
THE TOPICAL TALKER.
Wnililnstou'a Alleged Appetite for Wntcr
The Old florae Cor 6"rTlP.xi,o Pe
entlnr Cunt-mi of the Cnplinl Experi
ments Rapid Transit The Cabman to
Aveld.
trriOM a STAirr coRRrsroitDBirr.
Wasuihoton, D- c" MRy L "Morrison's
Stranger's Guide to Washington City"
states that "the consumption of water dally is
at this date, 126,000,000 gallons, the largest
quantity, proportionately to size, of any city la
tho world." Tho figures and tbe English aro
air. jsiornson'g, remember, not mine. Tho or
dinary observer would not suppose for an in
stant that watdr was so popular a beverage in
Washington. It is good water. I tested It my
self. Yet it lacks certain stimulating qualities
which the strain of Washington life noon tbe
human system would" seem to render desirable
in liquid refreshment Perhaps the natives of
Washington, who are to the manner born, dis
pose of most of the hnbdred and twenty-six
millions of aqua pura. It would be interesting
to know how many gallons, orpints, of Fotomao
water official and political Washington con
sumes.
It was a Congressman, you will remember,
who asked a waiter atWIUard's to bring him
another drink of what-d'ye-call-'em with ice in
it He wanted water, but he had forgotten the
name. It was his third term in Congress.
JT seems strange that tbe antediluvian horse
car is still paramount in tbe streets of Wash
ington. Streets so wide and level seem ideal
for electric or cable railroads. There is a cry
ing need for rapid transit here. The vacant
gaps have been filled In, but in a very impres
sive sense Washington is still a city of magnifi
cent distances. Of course, tho cab gliding
easily over asphalt pavements is a great deal
more available here than it is ever likely to be
in Pittsburg. There are cans and cabs, how
ever. In the capital. They do not compare fa
vorably with the cabs of tbat other great cab
opolls, London. They are not horsed so well,
and tbe hansom cabs, which are the pleasant
est vehicles under the sdn on good pavements,
are often old-fashioned, crazy and frowsy to a
painful degree.
A drive down Pennsylvania avenue on a
spring morning In a well-hung, clean and well-
horsod hansom is only comparable in my mind
to a like passage through Parliament street,
Pall Mall or Plcadllly in the English metropo
lis. But the grand advantace Washington
has over London and in lesser degree over
Paris, Berlin and Vienna, lies In her trees that
line her avenue, conspire for beauty and shade
in her numberless parks and gardens, and fairly
enmesh the whole city from border to border,
from wooded hill to silver river in a net of
dazzling green. Those who can, more and
more, ate building homes in Washington, and
all that surprises me is tbat more have not sur
rendered to t)ie wonderful charm of an
American city that puts beauty before dollars,
and comfort before commerce, and has an
abiding thought for the things which bring
health and happiness to tbe human race.
Washington Is tho product of the enterprising
new world working upon plans tbat the old
world has proved to a- certain extent to be the
best for congregations of men in cities. The
Washington of tbe future will have no equal
In tbe world as a place of residence.
'There is' of course little doubt but that
electricity will snpplant horse-power in
tho street 'railroads here before very long.
There is a cable now in uso on the Seventh street
line. An accident happened to It last week,
and the cable stopped for two days. It Is run
ning again now, and is of course a great im
provement upon the horse cars.
From the strong-smelling and altogether nn
beautiful center of Georgetown a new electric
railroad runs out to Tennallytown, a suburb
which is not a town. Further out on tbe same
road is tbe beautiful place which Mr. Cleve
land once owned, and sold lately so advantag
eously. Land speculators hold all tbe property
about Red Top, and the electric road seems to
have been built to create a want rather than fill
one. The scenery Is lovely, however, and as the
continuation of Massachusetts avenne will
bring this subarb into close connection with
the city, no doubt a population will grow
qnickly there. The Thomson-Houston over-
bead system is the ono used by the Georgetown
and Tennallytown road, and it drags the car
up very steep grades quickly and easily enough,
but with a very noisy accompaniment. It opens
up to visitorsSomolovel v views of Washington
and the surrounding country, inclnding both
branches of the Potomac The woods are stilj
untouched, and cover tbe deep valleys and
broken ridges with a most exquisitely varied
mass of foliage. Of course this sylvan country
is at its best just now.
Dew abe of the cabman who volunteers in
formation, whether it be topograpbical,
architectural, biographical or otherwise. Ten
chances to ono he will endow you with more
curious misinformation than you could acquire
from all the guide books published ma life
time. And this cabman with a taste for Clcer
onlc exploits is not a rare animal. He is only
too common in Washington.
Perhaps it was a punishment for not going to
church last Sunday morning tbat 1 fell into the
bands of a deceiving jehu, who drove a hansom
with a white horse. Throngb the trap-door in
the roof this engaging individual dropped nug
gets of general Information, anecdote and his
tory upon our devoted heads. We were navi
gating tbe fashionable avenues and streets of
tbe Northwest section, and about every other
house contained a Senator, a foreign Minister,
a Representative, a Cabinet officer, a million
aire or soma other notable person.
That cabman revealed a most pecu
liar knowledge of the houses and
their inmates, which he Imparted in a beery
but respectful voice to us. He became auto
biological at times In his remarks. For in
stance, close to Dupont circle be showed ns
tbe exact spot where he shot a rabbit three
years ago "when this here place was a open
field." He took care to point out to us the
residences of Senator Quay and Congressman
Bayne, for somehow be had divined our
origin. And it was in this way that he re
vealed his unreliability. It happened that we
knew Mr. Bayne's new honse, wbich is a very
handsome stone structure, on Massachusetts
avenue, bnt at tbe time tbe cabman showed ns
another house tor it we did not perceive the
deception.
One of tho curious features of tbe entertain
ment was tbat after tbe cabby had related
some particularly astonishing thing be would
givo tbe old white horse a startling flick with
his whip. I did not notice this incident until
afterthe journey was over and I had paid an
extra half dollar for the jehu's services as
guide.
Since Sunday I have taken a melancholy de
light In convincing myself of the falsity of that
cabman's stories. Hepburn Johns.
THE PBLNCE OF THE PENCIL.
Mr. Tbomni Naat, (he Beat Cartooulat, Now
n Dispatch Contributor.
The Dispatch, takospleasuro In announcing
to the publlo that it has secured 'Mr. Thojias
Nast, ablest and best known of caricaturists,
to make a series of studies of public life in
Washington.
He will delineate with bis graphic pencil tbe
Senator and Representative at work, at rest
and at plav. The characteristics of our famous
legislators will be sketched with the keen sense
of humor that has so long given Nast's pencil
the force and Insight of a powerful pen. Tbe
studies be will make of their demeanor during
debates, or In repose at their desks, and at
some of tbe social gatherings for which Wash
ington is famons, will be valuable as illustra
tions cf tbeir methods, and it is not too much
to say that they will be found worthy ot preser
vation in albums and scrapDooks as indexing
the traits and peculiarities of our most emi
nent men. Sketches by Nast at his best are
really admirable commentaries on tbe Idiosyn
cracies ot the persons portrayed.
He will also penetrate Into the inner realm of
officialdom and give faithful representations of
departmental men and methods. There Is a
wonderful field for. the skillful character
Iimner In the beehive of tho Capital. Nast's
Washington pencil photos will give life and
wit to verbal sketches which necessarily lack
the charm of actuality.
Mr. Nast will make his tow to the public in
The Dispatch of Sunday next.
Abolition of Tuition Feea.
London, May L Tho Baptist " Union has
adopted a resolution declaring that the time'
has come to abolish all fees at the public ele-
mentaryschools in Great Britain. ' -
A EECEPTI0N IN FAIRYLAND.
HII Agnes Hamilton' Dancing Class En
tenalna Its Friends Orncefal Move
nt edl of tho Youngsters Many Wed
dings Solemnized on Blny Day.
Tbe inhabitants of fairyland with their fairy
godmother, Miss Agnes Hamilton, heldare
'ception at Lafayette Hall last evening that
was attended by a host of mortals, as the
fairies would Say. And never have those
visionary little creatures afforded the less
favored such charming glimpses of thetr own
pretty selves and their graceful frolics, as they
did last evening.
To be practical, it was tbe reception of Miss
Agnes Hamilton's dancing classes, but remembering-
the airy, fairy little belle", with their
dainty costumes of whito mull. Composed of
multitudinous skirt!, and handsome lit
tle corsages, displaying the pretty pink
necks and arms, and tbo faultlessly at
tired young masters. who, with all
the grace of a Sir Roger De Coverley,
attended their Swpet little nartners. Toertre's
-Orchestra, from amid a collection of rare and
beautiful conservatory plants on tho platform,
discoursed Its sweetest mUsiC for the fairy feet
to trip by. Tho programme consisted of tho
gratid march, lancers and dancing In the
barn by tbe pupils and the hlgblahd
fling by little Marion McKeivy, who, with her
babrish crace and tinv flfrura arr.ivm1 1h th
highland plaid and tartan, succeeded in arous
ine rapturous applause and was fairlv bur
dened with flowers, which she acknowledged
with a Pattl-IIke air. "Morning and Ni"bt"
was then danced by two etherlal llt'le maidens
in gauze costumes, typical of their characters
a polka by all the pupils, Mother Gooso and
family by 16 in appropriate fancy-dress toilets
of all the colors of tbe rainbow, and a glide
mazurka concluded the Dart first or thenrn.
.gramtne, every little dancer of the fancy
uances naving Deen laden with flowers.
Part second was opened by a dance, original,
arranged by Miss Jean Hamilton. It consisted
of 12 little maidens, who by their costumes rep
resented flowers, bugs and birds, and by their
graceful movements almost bewildered the
brains of the spectators. Eight of the Mother
Goose family, in character costumes, wen great
applause, and Coming Through the Rve. by
two little Jtlrls, was equally pretty. Yorke,
by the pupils, and the Old Woman who Swept
the Sky, by Laura Liggett, preceded tbe
danco of the nations performed by 23 little
girls in dazzling beautiful costumes, which by
their colors representing some special country.
A waltz concluded the programme, and the
mortals whojiad filled every nook and corner
ot the ball and galleries took possession ot the
uancmg noor.
The members of the dancing class, which
closed for the Season with last evening's exhi
bition, were: Misses Jean Hamilton. Isabella
Leggate. Lillle Robinson, Annie Rutledge,
Mahiie Herron, Florence Gerwig, Annie Davis,
Effle Robinson,! Rebecca Davis, Norma Red
man, Nellie Reed, Llda Ferree, Ethel
Heard, Mary Boss, Jennie Hend
ricks. Pauline Seely. Ethel Hamilton, Bessie
Ward, Martha Leegatd, Louise Myers. Bertha
Bailev, BeSsie Dnnseath, Daisy B. Stearn. Annie
Boss, Messrs. Dudley, Liggett, James Hamilton,
Pier Dannals, John Murray, Harry Dannals,
Charlie Locke, Bert Klaus, Charlie Fite, Tom
Ingram. Paul Whitman, James Murrav, James
Young, George Von Wcller. Porter Jackson,
Willie Crosby James McEnulty, Walter Gille
land, Howard Boswell, Carroll Nichol, Willie
Powell, Walter Kneeland. Frank Ferree,
Stratford Gerwig, Louis Warren, Misses
Laura C. Liggett, Jean B. Woods. Iabelle
Warner, AHco Hall, Florence Boswell. Eleanor
Stayton, Seba Miller, Claudia B. Hax, Helen
Lewi, Belle Lawson, Grace Nichol, Tamer
Richards, Clara Fite, and Messrs. Elmer Klaus.
Frank Fite. Lawrence Nichol, Harry Mason,
Edwin Giles, Wailo Elphinstone, Howard
Giles, Louis Kennedy, Douglass Bingham,
Florence Biegert, Willie Bockstoce,
Harry Bockstoce, Cornelius Jackson; Misses
Helen Harrison, Daisy Dake. Bessie Miller,
Dell M. Klau, Lillian Bean, Lettlo Dunseatb,
Marie Rose, May Lawson, Marie Roberts, An
nette Gilleland, Clara Louiso Liggett: Harry
Ferree, Dean Mason, Addison Boss. Hanson
Rose, Roy Gilleland, Earl Mason, Charlie Dan
nals, Martin Hall, Alma Roberts, Marion Mc
Keivy and John Liggett.
TOOSTEiTATI.OTJS, YET BEILLIAHT.
Tbe Wedding of Mr. Will S. Power nnd
Miss Julln Word Mjlor.
Of decided Interest to educational and news
paper people was a wedding which occurred
last evening, and which united Miss Julia Ward
MylerandMr. Will 8. Power. It was a borne
wedding, but guests to tho number of 75
assembled at tbe residence of tbe bride's
mother, Mrs. Carolino C. Myler, on Edwin
street. East End, and although unostentatious,
it was really qujle brilliant. The various rooms
of tbe cozy home were all beautifully decorated
with rare exotic and native blooming plants;be
slde. handsome vases and rose jars were filled
with choice cut flowers. The ceremony was per
formed in tbe drawing room, tbe bride and
groom, entirely unattended, taking tbelr
position It front of tbe fireplace, the
mantel of which was a pyramid of
beautiful plants and sweet-smelling roses.
Rev. Dr. W. A. Stanton, pastor of the
Shady Avenue Baptist Church, was the officiat
ing clergyman. Tbe bride, who is a charming
young lady, is tbe daughter of Thomas T. My
ler who, before bis death, which occurred
some 17 years ago, was a prosperous merchant
in this city and a sister of Mr. Tom Myler, a
witty and humorous newspaper contributor.
She is well known in the city, especially
in educational circles, having proved
herself an excellent teacher In tbe
Liberty School. For her nuptials
she was arrayed in a sweetly pretty India
silk gown of pure white, made dancing length,
and her bouquet was composed of whito roses.
xne groom is a very ciever youi.g journalist,
wbo, it is predicted, will make his mark, as it
were, in bis profession. He has displayed great
taste and judgment in his selection of a help
meet to assist him in his ascent up tbo ladder
of fame.
The elaborate wedding snpner with which
tbe festivities were concluded at tho Myler
bouse, was served by Kuhu, after which Mr.
and Mrs. Power left for Cleveland: from there
they will go to Sandusky and Chicago, then to
New York, Philadelphia and Washington,
where they will viit the parents of the groom.
A Queen Anno house on Elysian avenue is Im
patient for its fair mistress and young master,
and but two weeks will be spent in sightseeing.
D0NATI0IT AND BECEPTJ.0N DAY
At the Protestant Home for Incurables in
Lawrrneevlllr.
Yesterday was donation and reception day at
tbe Protestant Home for Incurables, Law
renceville. Although tbe rains kept away
many visitors, the gifts were fairly numerous
and decidedly miscellaneous. Money, linen,
towels, fruit, tea, coffee, biscuits and preserves
filled the Matron's office, where Mrs. W. E.
McCandless, Secretary of the Governing Board,
presided. Some books and papers were also
sent and five barrels of flour, together with
some larger presents were conveyed to tbe
home in wagons.
Mrs. McCandless did the honors of tbe occa
sion, showing visitors through the neatly kept
corridors and attractive roams. In tho recep
tion and committee rooms are several of Miss
Wallace's successes In nils, on which the Home
prides itself to no small degree.
Refreshments were served from 2 to 0 P. if.,
and a number of guests chatted over ice cream
and coffee while waiting for tbeir cars. Several
ot the young ladies had volunteered as
waitro-s, and very pretty waitresses they made.
It is suggested that on next donation day these
charming distributors of sweet things, dress up
for the part, in dainty French cafe costumes.
The newly-opened male department was
visited by many, who were delighted with its
spick-and-span appearance.
Donations will be received by the Home
Committee during this weok and next Dry
goods, groceries, or money, will bo most ac
ceptable. NO ONE OPPOSED TO THEM.
The Present Incumbents of School PrlncU
pnlshlpa Securely Intrenched.
Tbo city and county superintendents of pub
llo schools throughout the Stato of Pennsyl
vania will be elected next Tuesday, when, for
the Pittsburg schools, Mr. George J. Luckey,
the genial gentleman who has been superinten
dent for the last 20 years, but objects to hear
ing the fact stated because it reminds him tbat
be is no longer a youth, will bo re-elected,
and Mr. John Morrow, wbo has been so ab
sorbed In the successful management of the
Allegheny schools for nine years past, tbat be
has not had time to get married, and so still re
mains an interesting bachelor, will also be re
elected, while Mr. Samuel Hamilton, who has
already served four years examining
teachers and visiting schools, will continue in
that special line ot educational work as County
Superintendent, as no candidate has had tbe
temerity to suggest such a preposterous Idea as
opposing these gentlemen, or attempting to dc
tbrode them,
A Musical Treat In Proapecl.
Such talented singers as Mrs. Emma Bingler
Wolfe, Mrs. Henkler and Messrs. Reynolds and
Lewis, will render solos at tbe Emory M. E.
Church concert this evening, and "Tbo Beati
tudes," a beautiful little cantata, will be given
by competent singers,' with a full chorus com
posed of the little folks of the Emory M. E.
Sunday school. The Prosser Glee Club will
also assist, and the Home Circle Orchestra will
make Its nod to the public by an overture
which will open the programme: Mr. C E.
Stewart is the director of the infant orchestra,
which will also try its lungs on two selections
beside the overture. Tbe pianists for the oc
casion will be Miss Beulah Little, Charles O,
Gray and Harry Floyd.
ftATtT! nrff at HEW TUBHER HALL,
Tbuma'a Saturday Afternoon Class Close
the Benson In n Delightful Way.
Pretty little maidens and handsome little
masters, with their doting parents and admir
ing friends, filled New Turner Hall, Forbes
street, last evening. The event was tbe chil
dren's fancy dress party and entertainment
with which the Saturday afternoon class oi
Ttitima's Dancing Academy closed the season,
abJ will long be remembered as one of the
most picturesque ahd enjoyable, both by the
little ones who participated in the festivities
and those whose sole mission was to look and
admire. The earlv portion of tbo evening was
devoted to musical selections and fancy dances,
wbich Included the Italian fisher dance,
talnborme dance, highland fling, flower dance,
Snahish t.lmhhrina ifohrA. hpnr rianrft. skirt
dance, harlequin dance and the dance of all na
tions; also, sailors' hornpipe, Castanet dance,
college bornplDe, Russian dance and minuet de
Mozart.
The costumes worn bv the little dancers were
extremely beautiful, and the admiration they
exc ted was only excelled by that which tho ex
quisite gracefulness of their wearers provoked
as, with the perfection of ease, to the rhythm
of tbo mnsle they followed the Intricate move
ments of the varloui dances. From 10
to 11 the little lovers of the are
displayed their knowledge and enjoyment
of the waltz, imperial polka, marcb,
plain quadrille, schottische. mazurka. Waltz,
La Broncho, polka, York waltz. laneer, Ameri
can gavotte, varsonvlenne, waltz and march.
The older people then joined in tbe mazy
whirl until 1 o'clock.
Tbe names of the graceful Httlo dancers are
Misses Ada Peirl Morris, Alice Asdale. Katie
McKeever. Mary Keuafa, Estella Parkhill,
Llllie McConnell, Nannie Agnew, Maegle Roll.
Mamie Ranisev, Nellie. McConnell, Olive May
Young, Violet Bollmnn, Sadie Wettach, Annie
Keenan, Katio Abrams, Nellie Faulkner,
Rachel Solomon, Mary Roll, Mary Pretles,
Nellie Gallagher, Cecil Speer, May Ountz, An
nie Evans. Edith Whitfield, Jennie McCagUe,
Esther Gross, Daisy Prager, Llllie
Derringer, Mary Freyvogel, May Vogel,
Nettie Lowenstetn. Rena Lowensteln, Ada
Nltttrldge, Clara Nuttrldw, Birdie Zocb, Lena
Reinecke, Flora Zocb, Tlllle Retnecke. Cora
Truxell, Elza Lenz. Nellie Brady, Lottie
De Puy, Laura illackmore. Alice Duffy,
Laura Pan d tie. Lottie Cnpps, Estella
Keyuolds. Edna Blackmore, Olive Riolev,
Olhe Price, Edna Tateni, Anna Reel,
Nannie De Puy, Florence Claf k, Elsie Clark,
Katie Reisfar. Ada Maybnry. Tillie Dimling,
Maud Stewart, Eva Johnson, Emma Frond,
Clara Maeder, and Masters Walter Amsler
Harry Dimling. Frank Thuma, James Bennet,
Harry Blackmore and Carl Maeder.
AIT EXCLUSIVE EAST END WEDDDTG.
Mlsa Bertha Cbndwlck United to Sir. Fred
erick W. rtlcKcc.
Tbe wedding of Miss Bertha F. Chadwlck,
daughter or Samuel Cbadwiok, to Frederick
W. McKee, a well-known yonng attorney, was
celebrated at the residence of the bride's par
ents, Lincoln avenue, East End, last evening at
6 o'clock. It was strictly private, only tbe
families of tbe bride and groom witnessing the
ceremony, which was performed by Rev, C. V.
Wilson, of Emory M. E. Church.
Tbe bride, a very pretty young lady, was
dressed in a simple girlish gown of white faille
and carried a boquet of bride roses and lillies
of the valley. After a wedding supper, at
which the families alone were present, the
bride donned a stylish traveling costume, and
with the groom departed on tbe limited for an
Eastern trip. When they return they will oc
cupy a suite of rooms at the VKennmarr,"
which have been elegantly furnished by tbe
bride's parents. Thev will issue "at home"
cards for Tuesdays in June.
The Cbantnuqan'a Last Meeting,
The inviting little chapel of theY. M. C.A.
building was tilled last evening by members of
the Pittsburg branch ot the ChanUnqua
Literary and Scientific Circle, in attendance
at tbe lat meetinc for tbe season. The special
feature of the meeting was an address by Miss
M. E. Hare on the subject "A Cbautauquan
Abroad." Solos were rendered by Miss Tlllle
Georgo and Miss Clara Smltb. while a recita
tion was given by Miss Georgia Mclntyre.
Just Sixteen of Them Now.
'Sweet 16 or 18 sweet teachers are now en
rolled for tho Teachers' Grand European Ex
cursion, wbich will leave here July 5, and It is
Inferred from the names already down that
the members of tbe party will receive tbelr
money's worth in fun and frolic,outside ot tbeir
expenses, for some very clever people are
booked, some very desirable bachelors and
some very charming young ladies.
Social Ctanirer.
The Young Ladies' Missionary Society of
the Sowlckley Presbyterian Church celebrated
May Day by serving its friends with hot choco
late from 2 till 5 In the chapel of the church,
and tho dainty cops of the steaming beverage
were in great demand as an antidote for the
chill anu gloom of tbe day.
At the Point Breeze Presbyterian Church
to-night tbe Alpine Quartet will give a concert,
assisted by Miss, Mary Bankard, of the First
Presbyterian Church choir. Wheeling. W. Va.
Miss Bankard is a celebrated contralto singer
and will make her first appearance in the city
this evening.
A physical culture entertainment at the
Pittsburg Femalo College this evening, under
tbe direction of Miss Bessie M. Wright, will
doubtless be very novel and unique. A curiosity
inspiring programme has been prepared and
accompanies tbo invitations issued.
At the Sixth Presbytorian Church, corner of
Franklin and Townscnd street, tonight a social
and literary entertainment will be given nnder
the auspices of the Young Peoplo's Society of
Christian Endeavor.
De Pachmann, the great Cbopln interpeter,
will delight all lovers of music at Old City Hall
this evening judging from reliable information
from eminent musical critics.
Jeremiah Feeeman and Miss Olive Wake
Held, daughter of Samuel Wakefield, of Mt.
Pleasant, were married yesterday at the home
of the brido's father.
The annual mpctlng of the Children's Aid
Society of Allegheny county will be held this
afternoon in tbe Dispensary building, Sixth
avenue.
The Philharmonic Society gave a very en
joyable concert last evening at Old City Hall,
for the benefit of tho Y. W. C. A., of the East
End.
Mr. and Mhs. Edwaed Kennedt, of
Chartters station, returned yesterday from
tbeir wedding trip.
CTJHEENT TTMELY POPICS.
The Queen of May got her feet wet yester
day. The Oil City Blizzard is anxious to secure a
hosnital for that ancient town and started the
ball rolling by subscribing fMi since which time
the affair appears to fallen Into a sort of Innocu
ous disquietude.
Young ladles should remember that both Ice
and milk have advanced In nrlce, and respect
their young man's feelings and pocketbook while
passing an Ice cream saloon. The proper caper
this summer is to call for one dish with two spoons.
Mrs. JonN A Logan Is an accomplished
carpenter and fills her home with skilled conven
iences or her own contriving. It Is not known
whether she belongs to the eight-hour movement
or not.
The Western Union Telegraph Company is
petitioning the city of Ilartford, Conn., for per
mission to put Its wires under ground. V bat
funny things a hunter meets when he has no gun.
The English Government thinks seriously of
making Stanley a Lord. It matters bnt little how
many handles are added to hl name, as he-wlll
always be known as Stanley, the Explorer.
Sheriff Sickles, of New York, is afflicted
with the gout. lie has the bulge on it to a certain
extent, however, as he left one leg pn a battle-
I-field.
The size of the beer glass does not appear to
have been Increased, notwithstanding the fact
that hundreds of new saloons were thrown open
to the public yesterday. A proviso should have
been made calling ror larger glasses, 'the matter
can be easily settled If all thebcerdrlnkers should
swear off until tho demand was acceded to. Hut
then they won't.
A man with a gift of gab has been selling
Michigan ladles Chinese Illy bulbs. In many cases
advancing the rnonay. The agent Is now sup
posed to be In Cblua digging the bulbs.
IF State Senator McAleer is elected to take
the seat left vacant by tbe death of Mr. Randall,
several reefs will have to be taken In the chair, or
else he will be unable to fill It.
GENERA1.ALQEB at the close of the war
landed In Detroit without a cent, and had to bor
row money to pay his board bill. At present be
owns 200 square miles of pine land In Michigan,
is reputed to be worth J20.IW.000 and is pestered
with a lively I'resldcntal bee.
If yon go trout fishing nowadays you must
tell your Mends tbat you cangbt five. They will
believe yon, whereas If yon captured from SO to ltu
and you so informed them, tbey would put you
down as an able-bodied prevaricator, A
IMPROVED COUNTRY ROADS.
Tbo Prpnlnrlty of tbe System Increasing;
Rapidly Ncvr Jeraey In tho Swim Gov
ernor Illll'a Srnalble Saeatliins Com
inenla on Tbo Dlapatcb Expedition.
The fact that Governor.Leon Abbett has
signed the amended road bill, permitting
the boards of chosen freeholders In those conn
ties in New Jersey which have availed them
selves of tbe new road law to raise additional
money to complete tho construction of tbe
roads already declared connty roads, affords
great satisfaction to tho friends of good roads
fn New Jersey, says a writer In the New York
Times. ,
Mr. Cbaunccy B. Ripley, who occupies the
position of chief promoter of the scheme of
road improvement, said yesterday that this- ac
tion on the nart of Governor Abbett meant
more for tbe interests of New Jersey than ap
pears On tbe surface. "Tho amended act is
more important even than the original bill," he
said, 'inasmuch as the appprnpmtion last
year was hardly sufficient to finish any one
road of the system of roads entered Upon. The
engineer Is building better roads than were at
first contemplated.
"The county roods generally have never
been in so bad a plight 111 the memory of man
as for the lass two months, February and
March. It has been next to Impossible to bant
material over the old roads to tbe new ones.
And, even with material on the ground, tbe
unprecedented weather and condition of the
earth would hot permit the work on tbe new
roads to progress. I speak mainly for Union
county, N. J., along tho line of the Central rail
roads, wbero the present system of improved
roads originated, add where the how law
has been reduced to practice mainly in that
State.
CroOkera Changing Front.
jiTfnATl regard as most Important In the
interest of Improved roads ate tne facts
that no citizen of Union County would consent
to go back to the old system, and no one wbuld.
If be conld. have his money returned on condi
tion tbat tne new roads be torn up and the for
mer state of things restored. One of out
chronic croakers against taxes for improved
roads, when asked by me if he would consent
to have tbe portion of tbe new road in front ot
bis own property restored to Its former condi
tion and thereby save bis taxes, answered:
'Well. I shall hot be required to pay more
than 32 a year for the rest ot iny life: It would
hardly be worth while, This man's property is
worth S15.00U. The next significant facets that
we have the pre-s solidly in favor of these im
proved roads, our Legislature is almost a
unit In tbeir favor.
"New Jersey Governors, Robert S. Green last
year and Leon Abbett this year, have given tbe
system their approval. Governor James A
Beavor, of Pennsylvania, says, in bis last mes
sage to the Legislature: 'The comfort of our
people, economy in the transportation of our
products, saving in the wear and tear of vehi
cles and animals, and the needless multiplica
tion of highways all demand tbat tbe laws gov
erning the laying out and construction of our
roads should be radically reformed and system
atized.' "No Governor has said more in a single mes
sage on this subject than Governor Hill in bis
last message to the Legislature of New York.
It is fair to add, too, tbat I have observed
nothing better expressed than what ha there
said. Governor Hill goes farther than bad
Sreviously been suggested, and urges that tbe
tote should interest itself in requiring every
county to construct and keep In repair at least
two principal cuunty roads, that these county
roaus snouia intersect near me center ox me
county, and tbat the county roads of each
connty should connect with the county roads
of every adjoining county. He thinks tbe
cities conld well afford to submft to taxation
for the development of tbe plan. No doubt of
It. To suggest ft fs to demonstrate the correct
ness of tbe view.
a
Governor Hill's Good Ideas.
i("1oVehnor Hill makes this additional
suggestion, in which there is great force,
that while, for the last CO years, the people of
this country have devoted so much energy and
money without stint to railroads and canals
and steamers, they have lost sight ot and
neglected their public roads. Instead of now
needing snoh public roads less than we needed
them half a century ago, we need them more.
He calls attention to the immense undertakings
of our ancestors in constructing expensive
roads for long distances, and how wonderful
that which they accomplished really Is, com
pared with much of the miserable country road
making and mending of our own ttmt.
"It Is not strange tbat, the State Qazttte of
New Jersey should say, and tbat the press gen
erally of New Jersey should quote approvingly,
respecting the new road law:
" 'This act is the practical outcome of a long
growing dissatisfaction with the prevailing sys
tem of public road building and road manage
ment, wbich places all tbeprinclpal thorough
fares under the ownership of prlvato corpora
tions, with the exasperating and oppressive in
cident of toll collecting, while all other roar's
are kept in a state of wretched unrepair by the
spasmodic and utterly inefficient system of
township control. Under the authority con
ferred by this wise law it will be pos-ible for a
county to supply itself in time with a complete
system of flrst-cla3 roads. Once built, the
cost of repairs will be less thru it costs to pay
toll on turnnikes and keep the other roads in
passable condition.' "
OUR B0AD EXPEDITION.
Cincinnati Times-Slar: The PnTSBtnta
Dispatch has delegated a man to ride over
tbe dirt roads of Pennsylvania and report tbeir
condition. A gentleman wbo was in Pittsburg
not lnng ago, on bearing of this newspaper en
terprise, remarked: "The delegate will be
lucky if he gets out of Pittsburg before getting
stuck in the mud."
Lateobs -ddnance.- We have some roads In
this country tbat need investigating, but we
give The Pittsburg Dispatch fair warning
that we'll not be responsible for tbe safety ot
their expedition if it tries going over some of
the roads.zfor they are actually mud rivers by
another name.
Brownsville Clippr: The Pittsburg
Dispatch, with its usual enterprise to gather
news, has sent out an expedition to traverse
Western Pennsylvania with a team ot horses
and a wagon, whereon is painted in large let
ters "The Dispatch." The mission was made
for tbe purpose of ascertaining the true condi
tion of the roads and making the fact known to
Its many thousand readers.
Huntingdon Journal: The Pittsburg
Dispatch has fitted out an expedition, con
sisting of a wagon built for the purpose, sev
eral horses, a special commissioner, corre
spondent and photographer, to explore the
country roads of Pennsylvania. While the
Idea is novel it is most excellent, and had the
start been made two months ago, before Provi
dence improved the highway?, the explorers
would have found the roads of Pennsylvania,
like Jordan, "hard to travel."
THE SONGS MY MOTHER SCXG.
"Angelns Domini nnntlavlt Marlal"
St. Mark sets the peal for an hundred chimes
dear:
"Angelas Domini nnntlavlt Marlal"
Thus the low prayer of my swarth gondolier.
The purple curtains of the west
Have almost hid tbe sunset's fire.
Which, flaming Venice-ward, a crest
Lights softly dome and cross and spire.
Deep He the shadows In lagoons
Far as Chloggla's aalls and reeds;
The air with landward perfume swoons:
Sly oarsman bows and eount9 his beads.
Our craft rides silent on the stream;
And, floating thus, I Idly dream.
And drcamr Ah. fair queen of the sea.
Not all lliy wltcblugs c-xn enthrall
And fold the wlpgs of memory!
A tbonsand leaiues one tone can call,
A thousand leagues one picture bring
In fadeless form and scene to me:
And though thy angelus thrillfal ring
Oat o'er the Adriatic sea,
I hear through all its rhythmics rang
Those dear old songs my mother sungl
O angclus-hour to heart and soul.
0 angelus-hour of peace and calm.
When o'er the farm the evening stole.
Enfolding all In summer balm!
Without, the scents or flelds-the musk
Ofhedgc, or corn, of wlnrowedhay
The subtle attars of the dusk;
And glow-worms like some milky way;
Within, as from an angel's tongue.
Those dear old songs my mother sang. '
"From every stormy wind that blows;"
"Softly now the light of day;"
"Thou hidden source of ralm repose;"
"I love to steal awhde away;"
"M5r days are gilding swlrtly by;"
"Depths of mercy can there 1e;'
"Jesus look with nltylog eye:"
"Bock ofages cleft for me;"
"Saviour, on me thy grace bestow;"
"Praise God from whom all blessings flow I"
"Angelas Domini nuntlavlt Marlal" ,
Sweet were tbe echoes that fell on tho ear;
"Angelns Domini nnntlavlt Marlal"
1 worshiped betimes with myswsrth gondolier.
-Edgar L. WaUman, in (Mautouguan.
CURIOUS CONDENSATIONS.
Overil.OOO live lobsters were shipped
from Eastport. Me., one day last week.
"Telepher" will In all probability be
adopted as an abbreviation for electric motion.
C. il. King, the singing Saline, Micb.,
gravedigger, has spent 21 years in the business
and planted 492 bodies.
Thomas Carter, of An Sable, Mich.,
wbo was a member of Mosby's band of
guerrillas during tbe war, Is dead and bfs body
Is in the potter's field.
Speaking of brief names, there is a
family In France named B, one in Belgium
named O. a river In Holland called the Y and a
village in Sweden named A.
Nathan Harvey, of Topeka, has a suit
of clothes made 5S years ago wbich shows the
handiwork of tjliver p. Morton, Schuyler Col
fax. General Bornsida and ex-Conzressmaa
Sbryock.
A Cedar Eaplds, la., gentleman recently
wrote a letter to tbe postmaster at South
Blendon, Mich., and, hot knowing bis name,
addressed the letter "To the postmaster." etc. ,
A week later the letter was returned unopened
and stamped "uncalled for."
Private ttichardson,the only Manchester
man. now surviving of the "Gallant Six Hun
dred." served 12 year, has no pension. Is nearly
blind and drifts from workhouse to workhouse.
A dozen other survivors of Balaklava are pau
pers either in of out of workhouses.
C. W. Wallingford, near North Bend,
Neb., recently discovered a rabbit about three
weeks old enjoying the companionship of a
nest of kittens. The little fellow was made
welcome and takes nourishment from the
mother cat tbe same as the rest of tbe family.
An Akron, la., boy attended school tbe
other day in company with a bottle of whisky,
and after Imbibing education and the contents
of the bottle at regular intervals for some time
adjourned tbe school by driving the teacher
and the other scholars from the room with tbe
stove poker.
Sumter county, Ga., is scourged with
millions of fleas, from the attacks of wbich
small animals and chickens are said to bodying
by hundreds. The flea is of the Mexican
variety, brought here by the hundred of Texas
and Mexican horses scattered over the country
of late years.
The Paris old soldiers' home, the
Hotel des Invalides, will very likely soon be
closed, Tbe number of inmates has sunk from
3,000 to 250. and the Government thinks of clos
ing the half-empty buildings and letting the
old soldiers shift for themselves on pensions of
300 or 400 francs a year.
Last year 67 persons in the Loochoo
Islands of Japan were bitten by tbe poisonous
babd snake. 12 of whom succumbed and53 re
covered. Forty-two of tbe victims were males
and 23 females, but tbe greater portion of
deaths occurred among tbo females, seven out
of the 23 cases ending fatally.
A pecnliar shaped mound was dis
covered near Mitchell, Dak., tbe other day.
and in digging into It the skeleton of an Indian
was unearthed, with the trinkets and weapons
usually found in Indian graves. The mound
was covered by heavy Sod. and everything In
dicated tbat many years had elapsed since it
was made.
One cause assigned for the healthfulnes3
of Chinese cities is that tbe people boil all
water Intended for drinking. They never drink
cold water. The national beverage, tea, is al
ways "on tap." even in the houses of the poor.
Every little hamlet, too. has a shop where hot
water can be bought for a trifling turn at any
hour of tbe day or night.
Fanners in Iowa have been greatly an
noyed by wolves, who have made repeated on
slaught upon their stock yards. In order to
exterminate the pests the farmers have ar
ranged for a grand wolf hunt. Tbe plan is to
surround a section of the Country and drive tbe
wolves upon a certain tract of land, where the
animals will be leisurely killed.
Auburn, Me., has a thief who is ap
parentlv unable to keep from business under
any circumstances. He was let out of 1atl the
other day, where be bad been confined for
some time. It was about 9 o'clock when ha
was released. By 10 o'clock be was drunk, and
by noon had "lifted" a silver ladle. Before
night he was back in bis old quarters again.
A cure for stammering has been discov
ered. It consists in keeping silent for ten days.
Then speaking in whispers, for ten days more
and finally returning to the ordinary voles
gradually. The expert who advances this
theory has not as yet been able to obtain a dis
ciple of tho fairer sex to experiment on. At
the first step in bis treatment there was gen
eral mutiny.
A new7 feature adopted for the lighting
of the new hotel at Tampa, Fla., Is the use of
incandescent carDons, by which the light can
be turned down dim if de-lred in a sick room,
or for other purposes. This is the first hotel in
the world lighted in that manner. The new
discovery has been used in some instances for
footlights of opera bouses. There will 2,000
lights in all.
Here are some interesting criminal sta
tistics: In the last ten years 672 persons were
committed for trial in England and Wales for
the crime of willful murder. Of tbese!B9were
sentenced to death. 231 acquitted and 142 ad
jndged Insane. Of the 295) condemned to death
154 were executed and 143 had commutations of
sentence; of tbe 209 50 were women, of whom
nine were hanged.
Mrs. Laura H. Knight, wife of George
W. Knight, of Bellefontalne, O- gave birth
Snnday morning to tbree handsome children.
two girls and a boy. Tbe combined weight of
the tbree is 16 pounds, the boy weighing seven,
one girl five and the other four. Mr. and Mrs.
Knight are eacb 28 yean old, and bave been
married two years and have four children. The
oldest is a boy 1 year old.
Pat McGratb, or "Woodford, Ky., pos
sesses a remarkable cat. It was born with only
three legs, and as soon as tho kitten became
large enough to leave its mother. Pat con
structed a wooden leg and successfully ad
justed it to tbe little stump that grew out
where pussy's fourth leg ought to bave been.
Pussy now trots along on tour legs with as
much eise and comfort apparently as though
tho wooden limb bad been placed tnere by
nature. But here is the wonderful part of the
story: Instead of killing rats and mice with
her claws, as cats usually do, pussy has learned
to use her club leg for this purpose, and it Is
said to be a very amusing sight to see ber run
up to a rat and knock him Into insensibility
with her wooden leg.
A FEW FUNNYISMS.
He drew his country girl close to him and
said:
"I dally need my little doe."
"So do I," she whispered, "but I won't have to
when we are married, will 1, Charlie?" Plunder.
Wile I declare, dear, I feel ashamed to
pack np these clothes for those poor little
heathens. They are really too far gone.
Husband Then you'd better send them around
to the minister's children. Clothier and Jfcr
niitur. "It's all rot If I had written what
Holmes has written, I wouldn't bo famous," said
Sneerwell.
"That may be so; bnt it works both wavs. If
Holmes had written the stuff yon write, be
wouldn't be famous." Pac.
Miss Cboteau (from St. Louis, examining
Clcverton'a Ascott)-Dld yon tie that yourself,
Mr. C'leverton?
Cleverton-Certalnly.
Miss Choteau-That's Just like you slow New
Yorkers. Hyou lived in St. Louis you could buy
your neckties already made. Clothier and Jtr
niilur. "What's that, Seth not goin' ter raise
any beans this year;"
"Not a bean, deacon; an I kin Jes tell ye that if
Congress passes that 'ere JlcKlnley bill, which
tates beans nigh onto 309 per cent, tt won't be
long before there ain't a railway rest'rant or
Sunday mornln' breakfast la the hull of Hew En-Kl&na.-Harper't
Hutly. ,
' "Yon. bad better be earernl about your ra-'
marks concerning Mr. Blank," said one Coa.
"He might challenge you."
gressman.
m,i doesn't worry me."
"He has the choice orweapons."
"What of It?"
"He might select two of those cigars he smokes. ,
You know he is ued to them." Washington
Post.
George Have yon and wifie decided yet.
what to name baby?
jack-X-o, not quite: bat the list of 3S0 names,
which my wife picked oat, has been reduced tc
179.
George Well, that's making progress, anyhow.
Jack X--s; but yon see about half of the 360
names were for another kind of a baby. FtwXork
WttUy.
Miss East Have yon had any experience
riding bucking bronchos In the West, Mr. JToote?
Mr. T. Foote Oust returned from some expert
meats Id amateur ranching) Oh, yea, a great
deal.
Miss East You must have ridden a good many
times?
Mr. T. Foote On tho contrary. Miss East, only
once; but there was enough experience crowded
Into tbe brief moments which were required for
the experiment to last me all the rest of , my sata-
ralllfe.-i'uc. - ?" i
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