E1!mI9H -A - ' E? ' .-TOT THE -PITTSBURG DISPATCH SATURDAY, OCTOBER' 1889. ' J s9i "j- . . I iMllTiiiJll 1 UP IN A BALLOON. The Readers of To-Morrow's MAMMOTH ISSUE OF THE DISPATCH Will Have Vast Vistas of Intelligence Mapped Out Before Them Like Aeronauts of a , Literary World. They Will Bee All That is Transpiring ON LAND AND SEA, AT HOME AND ABROAD, IN PALACE AND HOVEL, In addition to all the news and a large num ber of original and entertainiDg articles by the best writers of the age, there will be two very striking features, as follows: The opening chapters of "JOSHUA," BY PROF. GEORG EBERS, Which is the first of a series of BIBLICAL ROMAHCES, Which will include novels by H. Rider Hag gard, Elizabeth Stuart Phelps and Rev. Herbert D. Ward. Filkie Collins' Last Story, "One August Night in '61," prepared for The Dispatch a few days before (be great author's death. ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, 1846. Vol.44, 1(0.140. Entered at IMttsburg l'ostofllee. November 14, 15ST. as second-class matter. Business Offlce--97endQ9FifthAvenue. News Rooms and Publishing: House 75, 77 and 79 Diamond Street Eastern Adve.ttslng Office, Koom 46, Tribune Building, New York. Average net circulation of the dally edition of The Dispatch for six months ending September 30, 1ES9, as sworn to before City Controller, 30,095 Copies per Issue Average net circulation of the Sunday edition of The Disia.tcu for four months ending Septem ber 2), issst 54,188 Copies per Issue. TEU31S OF THE DISPATCH. rOSTAOK FREE IN THE UNITED STATES. DAILY Dispatch, One Tear t S 00 IUH.T Dispatch, l'er Quarter 2 00 DailtDis'A'CH, One Month 70 lHlLT DlSF .TCH, Including Sunday, lycar. 1000 DAILY DiSP .Tcu, Including Sunday, fm'thi. 2 60 Daily Dispatch, Including Sunday, 1 month 90 bUM)AYDls VTCH, Oneear S50 T EEKLY DISPATCH, One Year 125 The DAliT Dl jl'ATCH Is delivered by carrlersat 15 cents per wk, t. Inc'udlng bunday edition, at SO cents per week. PITTSBURG. SATURDAY. OCT. 5. 1889. TWELVE PAGES BURROWS AND FILIB&BTERIHfl. The Hon. Julius Csesar Burrows, while rejoicing in the "great victory" of the Re publican party in the new Northwestern States, points out that tfiere will be a very narrow Republican majority in the next House, and that the Democrats will nearly always he able to block partisan legislation by refusing to vote, and thus leaving the House without a quorum. Consequently, Mr. Burrows thinks, the Republicans will need a Speaker who knows the whole busi ness, and a convenient friend is ready to suggest, what the modesty of Mr. Burrows prevents him from stating, that he is ex actly the man needed. , This sonnds a good deal like two words for Mr. Burrows and one for the Republi can party. Nevertheless, supposing that statesman to be all that the fancy of his friend paints him, it is worth while to sug gest two things which maybe of more value against Democratic attempts to break a quorum than even the Wolverine statesman as a heroic dose. The first is that if all the Republicans are on hand attending to their duty the Democrats cannot break the quorum. If it is impractical to ex pect that all the Republican members will do what they are elected for, another protection against Democratic filibustering is attainable. That is to attempt no legisla tion except what is so fair and unquestion able as to leave the Democrats no excuse for resorting to obstructive measures. If that is done the Democrats will be forced to bear the responsibility of any failure of business resulting from partisan disputes. In short, if the narrow margin between the two parties in the House puts both of them on their good behavior, the public will be well served and the party that behaves itself the best will be so much the better off in the end. NO BOOM NEEDED. Prices on the leading iron and steel staples continue to move steadily upward. With- Bessemer pig at $2022, steel rails advanced, till this week's quotations are at S3233, billets at $35, coke at $1 50, and a general improvement of that sort all along the line, the sanguine will soon begin to scent a boom. One of the old-fashioned bulges in the market wonld only entail a reaction; and it is to be. hoped that nothing of the sort is in store for us. The best reason for that hope lies in the large increase of pro ductive capacity that is certain to be brought into the market with every dollar's advance above the present prices. Let us look for an active demand at good prices; but it will be better to have it understood, that there is to be no boom with its succeed ing shrinkage, if Pittsburg can prevent it, HILK AND DIPLOMACY. In a recent report United States Consul Diller, of Florence, Italy, displayed a sin gular conception of his duties by giving at some length a description of the highly profitable milk route worked up by an emi nent Chicagoan resident in Florence, one Le Boy De Koven. "Why Mr. Diller deemed it worthy to tell how Mr. De Koven had filled a long-felt want by supplying pure fresh milk and butter daily to his patrons in Florence, 'how he delivered the articles twice a day if desired, and made a special feature of providing milk warm from the cow, nobody seemed to know when first this brilliant contribution to consulary literature was published. The secret has come to light, however The milkman with the. aristocratio name Is now an applicant at the State Department for Consul Diller's We $m. place. LeEov De Koven wants to supply Florence with American diplomacy as well as milk. In this laudable ambition he has evidently been aided and abetted by Consul Diller. "We presume the latter is a Democrat,' and of course he knew that he would have to give up his office to some one. "Why not to the trusty milkman? He reasoned, his butter and his milk are of the best, his name suggests the peerage of France, rather than the packing houses of Chicago, and perhance if I give his milk route a good sized pan in my next consular report, who knows but he may grant me a rebate on my milk bills? Whether any exact agree ment was made between Diller and De Koven as to how many quarts or milk and pounds of butter were to be exchanged for the advertisement in the public documents of the State Depart ment will never be known. But we can see that the milkman struck a good bargain with the diplomatist The United States will be equally fortunate when Diller is bounced, and the suit of the Chicago milkman is de nied. WILL CABLE RATES C0HE DOWN! The report that one of the cable lines to the East End will, by the close of the year, reduce fares to the five cent basis clear through to East Liberty is made public in a way that lends it a good deal of credence. li it should be corroborated by an actual reduction at the close of the year, it would afford a strong evidence both of the success of the cable system and of the competition forces which bring prices down to hard pan" figures. Five cents for a ride to East Liberty sounds very cheap; and, in one sense, it is so. But the experience with cable roads warrants the belief that such a rate can be made a paying one. In the first place it would create an immense expansion of busi ness; and the nature of the traction busi ness is such that when it is once in opera tion every additional passenger is very nearly clear profit. Beyond that the fact that the net earnings are already such as to pay dividends on stock totals considerably in excess of actual investment, leaves little room for doubt that a five cent rate will yield good returns in actual cash cost Doubtless, in order to earn full dividends on watered as well as actual cash, the traction managers would, if they could, maintain the ten-cent scale. But competition will not let them do so. Rumors of agreements during the past year for maintaining the rate have seemed to be well founded. But if there were such agreements, the verifica tion ot this last report shows that the force of competition is not so easily overcome. The rate was forced down to a moderate margin by a force as certain as that which makes water run down hill, unless it is dammed up the competition of the steam railroad with the traction roads, as well as that of each with the other. A cable rate of five cents to East Liberty would only need a three-cent rate toLaw renceville or Oakland to make it the ne plus ultra of convenient and cheap transit A 0AEE OF F0T AND KETTLE. The contemplation -of the political field in New York State does not appear to the New York Telegram to offer much satisfaction to the independent thinkers who are in favor of honest politics. It considers the two or ganizations as presenting the aspect of two political Dromios, one operated by Piatt, the other by Hill, and each with practically the same shiftiness and lack of backbone. It devolved on the Democratic convention to unload the Democratic lights who were smirched by the ceiling job; but that body smothered the protest and put out its or dained slate. The Republican convention was called upon to take an outspoken stand on the temperance issue, but it dodged it Both parties are after the spoils, and are willing to let principles go the dogs. Under such circumstances, it is natural that people who think for themselves should be inclined to take to the woods of inde pendence, until a party organization is dis covered which puts honesty and principle above the usual political resorts of dodges and whitewash. ONE UUCOHQUEBABLE CHARACTER. Mayor Patrick Gleason, of Long Island City, has made another record. The achievements of that belligerent and yet practical municipal executive in bringing corporations to terms by chopping down their structures which encroach on the public highways are already matters of his tory. Mr. Gleason has now come into col lision with the political set-up, and has knocked it out as promptly as any con tumacious corporation. The delegates to the New York Democratic Convention from his district had a State committeeman to elect; and some of them planned to leave Mr. Glea son out in the cold by holding a meeting with the door locked, and Gleason on the outside. But that energetic person had not chopped down encroaching railroad gates to be backed by so flimsy an obstruc tion as a hotel door. With the door kicked in, the meeting was held, and Gleason came out as usual, on top. When neither cor porations nor political combines can conquer him, Patrick Gleason may claim to be the one indomitable man of the country. TIFS. It is unpleasant to observe on all sides an enlargement of the practice of giving and taking tips. To the man whose purse is but indifferently lined tipping is a very formid able affliction and danger. Rich men can afford to waste their money in tips as in any thing else, and it is their example that is so demoralizing. They are planting every where a desire for tips b'yindiscriminate largesse in hotels, on trains, and wherever they go. There is a serious side to this question of tipping. In this Republic there should be nothing moro precious in a man's eyes than his self-respect He should be eager to pre serve that at almost any cost. A tip he can not take and continue to have self-respect How many men among us must be losing a proper regard for their independence and honorl For tips are demanded in this city at most of the restaurants, in all the hotels and casually in half a dozen different trades and callings. Very likely the men who put out an expectant palm and are pleased to see it crossed with silver or even nickel do not realize what they are selling. They ought to remember that they are in a countiy where no man is so lowly thai he need put himself in the position of a slave. The men who take tips are slaves. The men who give them deserve slaves' service. THE ROAD QUESTION. Some very telling figures upon the cost of bad country roads aie furnished by Prof. J. W. Jenks. His calculations are based on the condition of country roads in Illinois, where the highways are perhaps a little more carefully worced than in Pennsyl vania, but where the softer and deeper soil mates the roads more impassable in bad weather than is the case with our hilly and stony roads. j -f rt ? i The net results of Illinois road-making on' the no-system which prevails there, as in most other parts of the Union, is that a full load for a two-horse team can be hauled three months in the year, two-thirds of a, load for three months more and half a load for the other six months. The cost or value of the extra labor in . hauling is over $15, 000,000 annually. The result stated in an other form is that Illinois farms at a distance from the railroad are depreciated in value by reason of the impassable roads over $160, 000,000. These figures give a fair idea of the money's worth to agricultural sections of a thorough system of road improvement which should extend permanent roads, smooth and hard at all seasons of the year, into every section of agricultural produc tion. Such roads would permit the farmers to market their products and make their purchases at a season of the year when they have time to do so, and would relieve trade and transportation from the attempts to crowd the movement of the crops and the agricultural trade into brief periods of each spring and fall. Together with this need is the fact that nearly every State has on its hands a con siderable quantity of convict labor which with proper provisions could be utilized in this work. The way to commence the con struction of solid and lasting roadways ought to be evident to all. It is regarded as a subject for disappro val by the Philadelphia Bulletin that "there are a good many so-called Republi cans in Virginia who are going to do what they can for Democratic success this year;" and the further assertion is made that they are Republicans who "support the party only when some personal advantage is to be had by doing so." The inference as to the entirely disinterested attachment to Repub lican principles displayed by Mahone and his followers, is amusing; but it will hardly fail to evoke the response that those who did the most for Democratic success iu Virginia are those who made Republican ism synonymous with Mahonism in that State. " Thibteen million dollars of a decrease of the publio debt in September more than offsets the $7,000,000 increa'se in August But is the decrease like the increase, merely an apparent and misleading result of the Treas ury system of bookkeeping? The lawyers are now attacking and de fending the constitutionality of the acts of 1887 and 1889, according to the views which they are led to tpke of the question by their respective retainers. The uncertainty is deepened br the lack of knowledge as to what views the Supreme Court will be led to take of the question. If there is one thing that legal science cannot foretell it is the ruling of the Pennsylvania Supreme Court. The three things which the most ener getic search fails to find at the present day are the qualified Cronin juror, the man who will take the Pension Office, and the New York millionaire who will put up for the Exposition fund. Buffalo has followed the example of New York and Chicago by obtaining a mandamus for the enforcement of a city ordinance requiring telegraph wires to be put underground. After all the other cities of the country have for years enjoyed the benefit of streets cleared of the electrical incumbrances, it is to be hoped that Pitts burg will make up its mind to do 'a little something in the same line. The satisfactory announcement is made that Postmaster General Wanamaker will propose to Congress that it shall mark down postage and make a drive by selling the remaining stock of two-cent letter stamps for a cent Samuel Atees sticks to his prophecy hat the world will come to an end next Monday. If Mr. Avers lives to contemplate the wreck of his prediction next Tuesday he will probably devote his attention to figuring out, not that his prediction was mis taken but that the workings of the univer sal cosmogony have made an error by fail ing to reach their proper result. The report that Montana vigilantes have undertaken to restrain the firebugs only leaves it necessary for Montana to settle who will restrain the vigilantes. Is it not a little monotonous to find the cry of fraud raised in the Montana election, just because the vote is close there? It would seem no more than fair for the fraud shouters to wait till the State gets into the Union before putting in their stereotyped excuse for defeat Plats which deal with big stock opera tions for their plot, furnish the latest varia tion of the recently fashionable water-tank drama. The sale of coke to the English market would be a variation on the old proverb about carrying coals to Newcastle which Pittsburg would gladly see achieved. But it may be well to wait for the return of sales before banking on a big income from the foreign coke markets. PEOPLE OP PROMINENCE. In 1855 James G. Blaine and Melville W. Fuller, the present Chief Justice, were report ers on papers in Augusta, Me. Bm Julian Padncetote, who is on his way back to this country, brings with him his wife and daughters. Washington society is prepared to give them a warm welcome. Just beforo Frederick Douglass sailed for his post as Minister to Haytl he was called upon by Lieutenant Edward Lloyd, of Maryland, whose great-grandfather owned Douglass and his mother when they were slaves. Robert Bohneb once paid Tennyson $5,000 for a poem whichmade only20 lines In the New York Ledger. This was at tho rate of 5250 a line, which is a price that would almost seem beyond the value of any written production. Mb. Horace Mabshaxjj Pobteb, son of General Horace Porter, is to bo married on Oc tober 22 to Miss Adelaide Wattson, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Thomas B. Wattson, of Philadel phia. Mr. Porter is a recent graduate of Princeton, and is connected with the Reading Railroad. Fob the first time in the history of the Yale Law School an Italian is among the students. Bis name is Big. Paul Rosso, and he has been employed as court Interpreter in New Haven for several years. There Is. also an Indian among the pupils, an educated man, and the first ot his raco to take the Yale law coarse. Miss Roxakna Wentworth. the only child of "Long John" Wentwortb, is one of the wealthiest women of Chicago. She was edu cated at Vassar College. Her father never allowed her to receive attentions from gentle men, and now, at the age of 80, she is still un married, although she is rich enough to sup port a family, having inherited six or seven millions from her father. Mas. Frances Hodgson Burnett was earning a small salary as a school teacher down In Tennessee when alio wrote her first stories. It U said that the stamps with which her first story was sent to Peitrtorit Magazine were made by picking blackberries. Her early stories attracted little attention, and it was not .until "That Lass O'Lowrie's" was published fc1 snea c,- that sue became Known as a popular writer. THE TOPICAL TALKEE. . His Temper Led Illm to Dyspepsia The Society Kiss Booth nnd a Lady's Feet The Dandelion's Complaint. When some people get angry they cannot eat Their temper walks away with their appetite. But I beard a case entirely different the other day. He was a man in tho prime of life about S5 probably. With many good things of this Iff e was ho blessed. Even a good wife bad been vouchsafed him. Bnt he lacked one important thing a good temper. His blood was hot and his spirit fiery. One evening he came home to supper with anger in his heart He bad been nicely trimmed in a commercial speculation. At the gate of his own garden his own dog for some unknown reason flew at him and bit a small square out of his trousers. That was irritating you'll allow. Everything went wrong. His father-in-law, a much greater nuisance than the most meddlesome mother-in-law ever known, waged war upon him after supper. By 10 o'clock he was in a supremely lively temper. After the family had gone to bed he went into the kitchen and literally gorged himself with some strong cheese and crackers, and pickles His anger had multiplied his appetite. The next day he had the most awful attack of dyspepsia imaginable. He has the disease still. But his temper is better. V THE SOCIETY KISS. ' O everyone knows what bliss in a kiss Is, That's given and taken with plenty of love; It's one thing at least that never amiss Is That no one's below, and no one's above. Bnt save ni, good Jupiter, save us from kisses Society ladles exchange when they meet; For clammiest, coldest of courtesies this Is bans sympathy, sugar and served without heat Motion one-Parse the lips Just ever so little; Motion two Btlck your head out, yonr model a dab your opponent as if lips were brittle, And using them roughly would cause them to break. Betlre In good order, composing yonr features To look like a statue or death mask of wax There! yon have all tho rules by which the dear creatures Eeauce to a science their kissing attacks. -H. J. V One young lady in this county is likely to remember for a good while the extraordinary effect Mr. Booth's triumphant acting as JfcAe lieu had upon her. She is tall and appreciated every Inch ot room she could get in her parquet seat at the Grand Opera House on Wednesday night When Mr. Booth began his superb tourde force, with which the fourth act of "Riche lieu" closes, this young lady gradually pushed out her feet It was an involuntary act of sympathy. As the excitement of the situation grew those two little feet found their way clear through the boles which Manager Wilt has placed for his patrons' feot to rest in under each seat When the curtain went down this young laay discovered for the first time where her feet had gone. It took cautious maneuver ing to extricate tbem. V "I think it's a horrid shame," said a dande liontoa plantain, in the new lawn attheSe wickley railroad station, "that they make that sign over our heads read, 'Keep Off the Grass.' They don't warn the public to keep off us; and if we don't outnumber the grass a thousand to one I'll go to seed at once." The plantain merely murmured: "Well, I should smile." BEMEMBERED IN TEE WILL. Creditors Who Waited Long Will at Last bo Fallr Paid. Detroit, October 4. D. M. Richardson, the match manufacturer, failed in 1S77, and Francis Adams, an indorser, lost 25,000 by the failure. Mrs. Mary Crary was also a sufferer to the extent of 5,000, and the estate of E. S. Galley dropped several hundred dollars in the crash. To Mr. Adams Richardson trans ferred a life insurance policy for 515,000, on which the assignee has since been paying the premiums. The other creditors were not in anyway provided for, and tho claims were about forgotten, as they had been outlawed. Richardson resumed business In 1880, and ac cumulated a fortune. Ho died last week leav ing an estate valued at fully 81,000,000. His will was filed for probate to-day. It pro vides among other things that Francis Adams shall be paid the full amount of his claim, less the $15,000 life insurance (and he is to receive all that he has expended in premiums). Mrs. Crary is to be paid S0.5UO, and the Galley estate 6350. After these claims are paid the property is to go to the deceased's family, the widow to have one-third and the only son, a lad of 18, the remaining two-thirds. SHE DOESN'T GET THE MONEY. Bliss Judge Breaks an Engagement and Loses Cash Thereby. 1 SPECIAL TELEGBAM TO THE DISPATCH. Boston. October 1 A novel suit in relation to life insurance money was begun in the Su preme Court to-day. Some time since John J. McCarthy, whose death recently occurred, be came a member of the Assessment Insurance Company, the New England Order of Protec tion, and bad his certificate made payable to bis fiance. Miss Sarah J. Judge. Afterward his engagement with Miss Jndgo was broken, and subsequent to that McCarthy, who was taken suddcnlv sick, made a will, in which he provided that his benefit in the order named be paid to his parents. The order, however, was not notified of McCarthy's wish pre vious to tho tetter's death. The order was, therefore, about to pay the money to Miss Judge. " In the Supreme court this morning full pay ment was restrained by an injunction issued by Jndze Devens. UDon the aDOlication of Lawyer McGeough, who appeared as counsel for Mr. and Mis. McCarthy to claim the fund on the ground that the deceased had changed his beneficiary, and that the insurance company cannot legally pay the money to Miss Judge, be cause she Is neither a relativejior a dependent of the deceased. F1YE-SC0RE AND TEN. The Oldest Resident of Lawrence, Mass., Passes Away. tSrECIAL TELEORAM TO THE DISPATC7I.I La whence. Mass., October 4. Mrs. Cather ine Donovan died to-day at the ripe old ago' of 110 years. She was born in Ireland in 1779, in the town of Tercastle, Kilkenny. She came to this city when there was but one honse in it, and built a little shanty, which she maintained as a boarding house for the men who were helping to make the foundations for a town. Up to the time of her death she kept all her faculties, and never wore glasses, her sight be ing perfect. ' Bcwlckley'a Financial Condition, To the Editor orThe Dispatch.l The article in your valuable paper of October 4 has some statements that are not correct. In the first place, the borough valuation, is not over one-half to two-thirds its worth, and th'e assessment for all purposes, including county and State, is not over 10 mills on the valuation. Second, The water bonds, on which 8 per cent is paid, is $00,000. These are redeemable in 1892. and could be floated to-day at 4 per cent. The Water Commissioners certainly deserve credit for giving citizens a full supply of perfectly pure water at a comparative! smaii expense. A Constant Reader, She Is btlll Learning. From the Chicago Ncws.1 Sir Edwin Arnold is lecturing on Brahman philosophy in Boston. It was generally snp. posed that Boston already knew more about Brahmanlsm than Colonel Brahma himself. DEATHS OP A DAY. General Asa P. BInnf. MAKCnrsTEB, N., H;, October 4. General Asa P. Blunt died here this morning, aged 62. He was born In Danville. Vt., served through the Re bellion as Adjutant Third Vermont Volunteers, and has been almost continuously in the United States military service since, receiving various promotions for meritorious services and filling many positions of responsibility and honor From 1877 to 1833 he was In charge of the military station at Fort Leavenworth and was Department Quar termaster at Boston at the time of his death. He received his commission as Major General United SUtes army last Saturday. Miss Itnth M. Wells. 'ft. Wayne, Ind., October 4. Miss Buth M. Wells, for SO years a resident of this city, died yesterday, aged 82. She bequeathed her residence property, consisting of half a block In the heart of the city, worth (25,000 to the city, provided an asvlum lor the blind be erected thereon. Her mother was for ye afflicted irlth blindness. Her only relative Is a nephew, Herman Wells, In bt. Louis. John Lyon Smith. Mtddletown, Conn., October 4. John Ly6n Smith, the last of the 21 original trustees of Wes kiCJ . .-1, 1"' "" wty, agea wj. newas r.born In Edinburgh, and .came to America at an Ik"178 - fjit, - ley an umvemty. oiea to-flay, aged S3. He Was AT ASCENSION CHUfiCH. A Fashionable. Tea Will be Given This Afternoon. The fashionable tea given by a few of the ladies of the Ascension Church, East End, this afternoon will be one of the most enjoyable affairs of the autumn. The residence of Mrs. Neilson Clark, on Fifth avenue, near Aiken street, will be th'e scene of gayety, and the plan is to conduct it as a private reception. The only difference is the guests are expected to deposit II apiece for tickets.' The names of the following ladies who will receive are sum-' cient to guarantee a social success: Mrs. Neilson Clark, Mrs. Joseph JDllworfb, Jr.. Mrs. Alex. Guthrie, Mrs. James MeCrea, Miss Guthrie, Miss Nellie Wood. Miss Lonlse' Sneer, Miss Montgomery, assisted by Mrs. O ranee. Miss Rlckctson. Miss Irwin. Miss Uoldshlp and tho Misses May and Antonette Montgomery. The tables will be presided over by Mrs. Henry King, Mrs. Alex. Guthrie, Mrs. MeCrea, Mrs. Joseph Dilworth and Miss Speer. The object of this is to raise money for the benefit of the church. Everyone is invited to attend. The supper, at which a specialty will be made of chocolate and coffee ice, will be under the direction of Kuhn. The hours are from 3 to 7. In a Social Way. The reception held at the home of Mrs. Woods, on Walnut street, East End, yesterday, was a very nleasant one. The honse was hpun. I tif ully decorated with cut flowers, and about 75 ladies paid honor to the charming hostess. The repast was served by Kuhn. Rkv. W. H. Peaeoe, D, D., and his good wife entertained the members of the Official Board of the Butler Street M. E. Church, with their wives, Thursday night at the parsonage on Fortieth street Mrs. Jenness Mtli.ee will deliver her lecture on "Dress Reform" at City Hall, Market street, on the afternoon of October 15. Mbs. John Daxzexl will receive a large number of her friends next Tuesday at her home in Hawkins. V , TEIALS OP THE EXAMINEES. Civil Service Officials Driven Almost to the Verse of Insanity. From the New York Tribune.l There are men in Washington who reach the borderland of insanity every three months. They are the examiners of the Civil Ser vice Commission. By nightfall of a day on which an examination takes place you could not get one of them to swear to his own sanity. The last examination was probably the most trying since the com mission was established, as there "were over 300 applicants in the various rooms. Although everything is printed as plain as a signboard, the examiners are harried by foolish questions at every turn. They first announce as they prepare to pronounce the words in spelling: "I shall give the word and then Its definition. You are to write the word, but not the defini tion." They say this three times, the last time with icy distinctness. "Did you say to write the definition and not the wordf comes from the corner of the room in a man's voice, as the se:ond word is pro nounced. The words "cymbal" and "symbol" are pro nounced with their respective definitions. "Shall we write symbol,' the sign, or the mu sical instrument first!" again in a man's voice. This sort of thing keeps np until the exam iner, maddened, refuses to answer any further questions. More trouble arises from the necessary red tape, however, than from anything else. The numbers are given to each applicant one, the application number, the other, the examination number. One middle-aged man at the last examination insisted on writing his application number right in the face of the warning which said: "This space for examination number." When bis attention was called to it he replied in an injured tone: "I've had that number in my mind for two neeiio. uay aim ingui, ana ii i aian't put It down there I'd just as like as not forget It. One of the applicants was asked how he passed. "First rate," said he, "there was a nice, smart girl right next to me who passed me all her papers. There was only one thing 1 couldn't do, and that was the decimals. I never heard of decimals Defore." Equally intelligent was the remark of a woman who took tho examination: "I couldn't do that example in Interest" said she, "that one that read "write in words 5 yrs. 8 mos. 2 wks. 5 hrs.' I never could understand interest" A W0BDBEFDL SPEED. Tho Great Bate Attained by tbo New e Crnlser Baltimore. Washington, October 4. The report of the trial board on the cruiser Baltimore relative to her recent trial run was received at the Navy Department this morning. The board states that the average horse power developed by the engines was 8,977.88, the requirement being 9,000, thus making a deficiency of 22.12, which would incur a penalty of 82,212. The screw made an average of 117.9 revolutions a minute, which, allowing 10 per cent slip, would give her an average speed of 19 6 knots an hour. The report states that during the run two of the indicators, which had been thoroughly tested before the trial, broke, and it was necessary to substitute two others which had not been tested. On the record of these indicators de pended the record of the development of horse power. Secretary Tracy, after reading the report this morning, decided to waive the question of acceptance of the vessel until he could hear from the Cramps, the contractors, as to whether or not they were willing to let the last trial stand as the final one. or preferred to have another trial run with the indicators thoroughly tested. His deference in the matter is based on the accident to the indicators. The report shows that the ship made a wonderful speed, notwith standing the failure to develop 9,000 horse power, and the Secretary is inclined to look upon that achievement as eminently satisfac tory. Tho allowance made for sup in cal culating the speed Is a large one. Best Fnper 'West of the Mountains. From the Martin's Ferry News.1 The average circulation of The Pittsbubo Dispatch is 30,015, and of the Sunday edition .5,643. It is not to be wondered at that The Dispatch forges ahead at this rate, for it is the best newspaper published west of the Alle gheny Mountains, if not in the entire country. The circulation of The Dispatch increases because it is deserving. FurchnsInK Plenty of Silver. Washington. October 4. During the pres ent week the Treasury Department has pur chased, at satisfactory prices, 416,000 ounces of silver for colnago into standard dollars. Of this amonnt 75,000 ounces is to be delivered at the New Orleans Mint, 40,000 onnces to the Carson City Mint "and 301,000 ounces to the Philadelphia Mint No One Plspntes It. From the Detroit Free Press.! "There are 40 ways in which I can steal, rob, embezzle and murder and yet keep clear of the law," says a New York lawyer. No one dis putes that assertion. Indeed, all will be sur prised that he has not discovered 100 ways. THERE IS NO DEATH. There is no death! The stars go down To rise upon some fairer sbore. And bright in heaven's Jeweled crown They shine forevermure. There Is no death! The dust we tread Bhall change beneath the summer showers To golaen grain or mellow fruit ' Or rainbow-tinted flowers. The granite rocks disorganize To feed the hungry moss they bear; The forest leaves drink dally life From out the viewless air. There is no deathl The leaves may fall, The flowers fade and pass away They only wait through wintry hours The coming of theMay. There is no deathl An angel form Walks o'er theearth with silent tread: He bears our best beloved things away, And then we call them "dead." He leaves our hearts all desolate: He plucks our fairest, sweetest flowers Transplanted into bliss tbey now Adorn Immortal bowers. The birdlike voice, whose Joyous tones Made glad this scene of sin and stitfe, Blngs now her everlasting song Amid the Tree of Life. And when He sees a smile too bright Or heart too pure for taint or vice, He bears It to that world of light, To dwell In Paradise. Born Into that undying life. They leave ns but to come again: With Joy we welcome them-tbe same, Except In sin and pain. And ever near ns, though unseen. The dear, immortal spirit tread; For all the boundless universe Is Life there are no Dead. . V- . - -. , -?. GOTHAJL'S GRIST OP GOSSIP.- Dynamite In a Tin Pail. NEW TQBK BDBIAC SPECIALS. J New Yoke, October 4. The police have done a little toward unraveling the mystery of the explosion which wrecked the office of J. & P. Scanlan yesterday morning. A regular in fernal machine under a thick layer of bread and cheese in a brand new tin pail did the dam age. At 7-20 o'clock this morning a working man found the pail behind the big front door of the Scanlan office. No one present knew anything about the pal), and a superficial ex amination revealed only a few slices of bread and cheese. The night watchman, who first told his story to-day, upon going home for the day placed the pail well inside of the office, thinking it belonged to one of the day men. Tho handle of the pail was found to-day, three-quarters Imbedded in the wooden celling, directly over the spot where the pall exploded. The pur pose of the dynamiter in placing the infernal machine behind the door was undoubtedly to blow up F. Scanlan, who usually passes most of the morning on the threshold, gossiping with customers. Mr. Scanlan is ready to pay S500 for the apprehension of the mad who left the pail. Robert Gran Out of Jail, Theatrical Manager Robert Gran, who, for the past two months, has been confined in Ludlow Street Jail in contempt for failing to appear in supplementary proceedings on a judgment of 1120, obtained by Minnie Rich ards, a chorus girl, for salary, was discharged to-day by Judge Daly, of the Court of Common Pleas. Gran claimed that the only way he could pay the judgment was to earn the money. Not New In Plttsbnrg. Two young cigar manufacturers here have just had patented an automatic cigar vending machine. In return for a nickel in the slot this machine delivers a 5-cent cigar. The metal box which covers the Mechanism has a capacity of 100 cigars. The machines will be put on tap at elevated railway stations. Singular Clause of a Win. The heirs and relatives of the late Wright Duryea, the millionaire starch manufacturer, filled the little Surrogate's Court at Jamaica, L. L, this morning. The will, which they had come to see probated, distributed the $1,500,000 estate of Mr. Duryea pretty impartially among the members of his immediate family. His sons, Louis and Frank, received in equal parts his Interest in the Glen Cove Starch Manufac turing Company, the Glen Cove Machine Com pany and theVosburgh Manufacturing Com pany. The mos curious feature of the will is this paragraph: That the monument over my grave shall to a degree or in one sense indicate my life. I direct my executors to procure a large bowlder stone, of not less than 4,000 pounds in weight, in all respects as nature shall have formed It, its surface being irregular and with sudden elevations and depressions, smooth only to a moderate degree, upon which bowlder stone shall be inscribed, in legible letters of reasonable size, my name, at; cT ana date of death and cause; this bowlder stone to be placed over or at the bead of my-grave, as soon after my death as li reasonably prac ticable, upon a substantial foundation of brick or stone masonry, extending it to a depth of at least eight feet below the surface of the ground, which bowlder stone and inscription thereon shall be the only monument erected to my memory." The will covers 20 pages ol legal cap. They Had the Same Wile. The United States Consular Agent at one of the Guatemalan towns is named" Simmonds, and he has lately come to New Tork on personal busi ness. To-day he went into Boyle's barber shop, in Union Square, to be shaved. Mr. Boyle's taciturnity is not bis best hold, and so be was chattering away to his helpless customer when the conversation drifted around to geographi cal subjects, and finally Mr. Simmonds said be lived in Guatemala. "Ob, do you?" said Mr. Boyle. "I have acquaintances there myself." "Indeed!" said the Consul; "who are they?" "Ob, well, I knows the s," said the barber; "A fine family, sir," returned the Consul, with some emphasis. "I married one of the s.sir." "Did you, though?" said the barber. "Which one, sir?" "It was Miss Emma whom I mar ried." Well, well," said the barber, "just to think of that! Why, so did L" "What?" said the Consul, leaping, lathery and half shaved from the chair. "Why, yes." said the barber. "Miss Emma, wasn't It? Yes. I mar ried her once upon a time, but we didn't agree very well, and one night 1 caught her coming out of a hotel with a gentleman to whom I bad never been introduced, so I got a divorce." "Good Lord," said the Consul, with an empha sis that shook down two rows of cups and. turned the spigot in the hot water tank, "that's what Pve come to New York for to get a di vorce" At last accounts the Consul, the bar ber and the barber's best friend were in deep consultation. DE1TES TO A F0ETDSE. How an Indianapolis Policeman Ha do a Man Rich. Indianapolis, October 4. William J. Looney, better known as "Billy." died in Duarte, Cal., Tuesday. Looney left this city about a dozen years ago under something of a cloud It being said he was wanted by tho police for participation In a brawl, and escaped from an officer by boarding a freight train as be ran through the yards pursued by the officer. He made his way to Kansas City, where be arrived with 7 cents in his pocket There he entered the saloon business as barkeeper, raved his money, bought a saloon for himself, was elected Alder man and at the time of bis death was worth SlSCOOa He leaves a wife, bnt no children. A few months ago while the officer who chased Looney out of Indianapolis was in Kansas City, Looney thanked bim heartily for having, as he said, "chased me into a fortune." Not Utterly Useless. From the Chicago Tribune. 1 We tako pleasure in recording the fact that New York's 400 are not altogether the useless citizens they are popularly supposed to be. One ot them, it is claimed, has discovered a sura cure for warts. In the fevreet Bye and Bye. From the 2iew Tork Herald.: What a magnificent Republic this will be when Canada applies for admission into the Union. Destiny brings all these little matters about in good time. An Odlce Seckluir a Man. from the Philadelphia Inquirer.! When the office seeks the man, it seems to have jnst about as bard a time of it as the man has when he seeks the office. Vide the Pension Office. TKI-STATE TRIPLES. AN Erie man had great fun the other day by letting a big eel loose in a crowded store and telling the people to save themselves, as the bie rattlesnake had escaped from the dime museum. In the melee a large quantity of eoods was badly damaged, boxes and jars smashed and the floor flooded with molasses. Four ladles tainted . The eel and the practical joker escaped. A vest fierce-looking wildcat is on exhibi tion in a Wheeling store window, and it has attracted a great deal of attention owing to Its? appearance. A man who professed to know all abont wildcats went in to examine it the other night and there was quite a crowd about the window. The animal, which is stuffed. In some way fell from its perch, and the crowd on the outside made a great scatter, while the old hunter, on the inside, caue near fainting. A Mosrok county (O.) man raised 1,000 bushels of potatoes on two acres of ground. A &ABGE copperhead snake found its way through a Columbia bydrant A Wixkesbabre lad of 5 years enjoys a smoke, and has a fondness for a 4-year-old pipe of his father's. " The Carbondale Zeader claims that that town, with 12,000 inhabitants, drinks LSQ0 kegs of intoxicants in a month, A peisoseu in tho custody of a Lancaster constable was rescued by one of his friends, and the officer afterward arrested, the rescuer, bnt on the way to jail he, too, made his esease, A2SW V A Pjuuby-UTAMIA exchange speaks of oHFftnfeaUon ot a JTreew stegtttTeMM.". CUKIOOS CeKMaSATIOW. One of the patieata in the Iaaaae Kospl tai at wanes. Pa,, u WiMiaat Nye. Mr. George W, Tall aad Mies 1Mb Short were married la Bahteere the otter day. An eagle that meawred 8 feet wkh ' its wings spread out wa that the other day at Rutledge. Ga. The- bird was siKtafc o a piae tree looking at a 6-montbV old baby. Good news for the bald and gray heads comes from Indianapolis. The water from a sew artesian well thereabouts predaeeeaew crops of hair and turns gray beards Maei. While out walking with nieawtter at Canton, Mass., a little sea of Charles Swbhwi was attacked by a large gray squirrel, wk4eh ran no bis clothes aad sevenlv hit sad I scratched his face. B. P. tarker, & Blacksfeeu'i Mill, Laurens county, Ga, has a boy baby 1 months and 14 days old. At 4 months andM days he had two teem, and weighed 3? possess and could sit alone. The annual cost per man la sesae of tba armies of Europe i: M la Great Britain, jl inAustro-Hufigary, 48 la Germany. 238.18 la Russia. Switzerland comes at Hie hoMea ot the list, with as aasaal cost of only St per man. A physician of Bale, N. J Jar a morning glory growing In bis yard that kq&He a phenomenon, a seed la oae of toe Monms having sprouted and grows a vise ot eesfMer- able length, on the esd of whlea it anesaer bloom. ( A large force ot raea axe sew at Trk . inCoyocan, south of theCKvof Mextee.dteetar la... - - - - TT- A r ior tne treasure saenosed to have beea 1 oy ttionieiuma. Ther are eaaMaat of snaassnx and have already discovered a number of Astee 4 .A New Tork florist says: 'It seay seemstegalar.but Pve beea keepieg a record for thd 20 years past, aad I have faaad Oat nine murderers out of ten are ardent admirers of. flowers, and most of them prefer daWei aad lilies." Forty tramps west about St Helena, Montana, the other day, actually begging for employment They were put to work In a vineyard the same day, the story goes, but by the next afternoon all exceptteg three had dis appeared from the sceaeof their brief acHri- The farm ol William Blodget, three miles from EUIcottarule, K. Y has a flae apple orchard, nearly every tree of which la now in bloom for the secoad tlaae-taJe seaaea. The orchard is on rather low groaad aad it Is thought that the recast wet weather has oaased the pheaomeaoa. Henry Collasi, of Hall esvar, Ga., has lately made a will leaving all his property' to the blind, one-armed aad oae4egd Ceeiea , ertte veterans of Hall and White oout.fa . Is the father of several children, "who are tstaa i debarred from any right to his property, wMek ;' WUUUttU Ml SUVUb SJ.V,1Xk Green Howell, a 53-yeatf-old negro Kt lng near Gainesville, Ga., was as black as the ' ace of spades 25 years ago. Then two white spots about the size of a nickel appeared upoa his skin. Tbey continued to spread aatH he is now spotted all over and appears likely to Decome as wmte as any Caucasian. Amos Haynes, of Richmoad, lad., died Wednesday from the effects of basspiag his v head in going upstairs. This was Monday -S night, and nothing was thought of It next day A save to laugh at it at the breakfast table. But , before noon he was prostrated as by paralysis, ' including his entire right side. The skullwas not fractured, but the physicians say his blood 5 vessels were unnaturally weak aad the jar ban one In the brain. v' James O'Brien, Jr.. of Danes, Ga., was out In the rain and got thoroughly wet When he returned he went to bis room for the purpose of changing his clothing-. After select ing all necessary articles, with the exception of a pair ot sock, he pulled open the bottom drawer of the bureau, expecting to find them there, but to his great astonishment upon opea- . ing a box. in which he usually kept his ties, ha found coiled therein a snake about 26 inches long. Although a postal telegraph system has been in operation In England for so many years, it is only during the current moath that facili ties for telegraphing money have beea afforded the country. Now in 18 of the largest clues a -; money order can be telegraphed from or paid ft at the. postoffice, but already there are com- " plaints that no saving is effected by tee new system. Telegraphing is saoa slow work m tbe, . , . old country, and the man service is se'exeep- f tlonally rapid, that a letter of tea beats a- tele gram in a fair race. There are many Helilahs, hut oaty oae Samson, and he is performing at the Royal Aquarium in London at present, where his feats of strength are certainly of an original and marvelous character. The spectator, as he watches, feels that it is better to be friendly with such a man. for with a blow of bis fist be breaks an Iron chain that will bear a pressure of 3,000 pounds. With his two hands grasping a short chain of 2,600 pounds ascertained pres sure, he makes a momentary effort aad pass the iron chain to- bits. A remarkable mistake was made at the opening of the Industrial Fair at Toronto. Sir - John Macdonald had made his opening speech of congratulation, and before calling upon bim to press an electric button starting the ma chinery. President Withrow invited oae or two other speakers to deliver addresses, Oae of them was Mr. John Leys, M. P. P. for Toronto. He advanced to the front and laid his heavy white hat right on top of the electric button. Instantly there was a shrieking of whistles, and the machinery in the building began to run. The crowd roared with laughter, and after much gesticulation aad running aboat the managers stopped the proceeding, and the machinery was restarted by Sir John and Lady Macdonald. A congress of chemists was held recent ly in Germany in which several notable scien tific diversions were exhibited. Oae In par ticular attracted special attention. Dr. Hoff mann, of Cologne, gave a shortlecture enumer ating the difficulties experienced by students in remembering the constitution of organic com pounds, and proposed an original method of fixing the formula in their memory. A ballet then commenced. In which the corypaees, dressed in various colors, represented the dif ferent atoms. Under the direction of the pro fessor, the atoms groaned themselves in differ ent attitudes, renresenting the chemical com pounds and their reactions. Specially note worthy were the composition of benzole and aniline and its derivatives. On the formation of f uschlne, or any of the coloring- matters, DTiuiani ugnia uiumiuaiea ine groups. Acs representation terminated In the explosion of one of the substances. This "excelsior ballet" was the crowning event ot the evening. FASCIE3 OF FUNNY MEN. The right man in the right place the tramp at the woodpile. Burlington free Prat. There is a great movement on the part of the anarchists when'the barkeeper offers to treat to beer. Troy Prut And Get E"ired. First Match I think I shaU strike. Second Match-I wood. If. T. Ban. The woman who carries her handkerchief In her corsage should remember tho fate of the man In the fable who warmed a wiper In bis bosom. Tern Hants Exprtii. There are few society belles who have not a record of conquest made with the assistance of smokeless powder. There is nothing; new under the nn.WaiMngton Capital. Young Bnifldns passed his sister the paper, -remarking: "Here's something that may Inter est yon so long as you have determined to ride a bicycle." "What Is It?" The fall fashions. "Wtuhingtm Capital, THE DIPLOMATIC MAH3KN'. "Doa't love me for my wealth or brains 1" He asked the maid with words intense. To which she made this wise reply: I love you, dearest, for yourJ An Interruption. "Sixteen years ago, my friends," vociferated the aery socialist ora tor, with flashing eye and gleaming- nose, "I left England and came to this country " Thank the Lord, " exclaimed a devout Ea glishman in the audience with much feeling-. CMcago Tribune. McCrackle Didn'tyou tell me that Maflg doi belonged to the better element onociw "Well, I've seen him coming oat of gambuag .v... v. ... t- That's what Zvl MM." ff r. ft-un. Bennie Mamma, do people really buy u.n .n .mm. nf coarse. Bun out t i r, iTria.f- va l,vt4.0, v..'-. " - ti.i.i 1 -- .fniiTi Then why- Is lt,f mamma, that poor people bay more of 'em than J anybody ttei-CMcago TWSan- $,$ Reassuring. Guest (angrily) CeafoaadS yoarawkwartaewl You've spu S , xvu-unut (heartily) Don't mtadtCi sirl'X Mm sees more. IHess'joa.-ltfcew'al 1 & -,-. IT Jil- 2k,2K . ' sJBssssssssssssssssssssssiissssssssssssssssssi ft JMfcMMMMlMiiaMltfcitJMWB v: yj