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!THlf PITTSBURGH MSPATCH,
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Established February 8, lsie.
YoLW, Ko. 124. Entered at Pittsburg Postofflce.
November 14, 1&87, a second-class matter.
Business Office 97 and G9 Fifth Avenue.
Heirs Booms and Publishing: House 76,
77 and 79 Diamond Street
Saltern Advertising Office, lioom 45, Tribune
Building, AewYork.
Average net circulation or the dally edition of
The Dispatch for six months ending August 31,
lSS9.asswornto before City Controller,
30,045
Copies per issue.
ATerage net circulation orthe Snndav edition of
The Dispatch for three months ending August
U, 1SS3.
55,643
Copies per Issue.
TEEMS OF THE DISPATCH.
POSTAGE TBKE 1ST THE TMTED STATES.
DAILY DisrATCIt, One 1 ear t 8 00
Dailt Dispatch, Per Quarter 1 00
Daily Dispatch. One Month TO
Dailt Dispatch. Including bundar, 1 year. 10 00
Dailt Dispatch. including bundav.Sni'ths. 2 60
Dailt Dispatch, Including Sunday. 1 month 80
feUND at Dispatch, One'iear 260
AVeeklt Dispatch, One 1 ear 125
The Dailt Dispatch it delivered by carriers at
ICcents per week, or Including bunday edition, at
20 cents per week.
PITTSBURG, THURSDAY, SEP. 19, 1SS9.
ONS-THniD OF A JUBY.
Four jnrors in the Cronin case accepted
and sworn in yesterday constitute the sole
evidence, so far attainable, that the ma
chinery Tf the law is mo ving in the d irection
of punishment for the perpetrators of that
remarkable crime.
Heretofore the impression has been rather
strongly to the effect tbat the wheels of
justice were locked. Weeks of wrangling
by lawyers, of an inquisitorial examination
of the men presented to act as jurors, and of
objections and challenges, either upon the
most finely-drawn foundation, or merely
upon suspicion, have carried the progress of
the trial to the point where one-third of the
jury is obtained; and a proportionately
long time may be expected to elapse beiore
the entire jury is secured.
It ought hardly to be necessary to say
that this does not show a satisfactory opera
tion of justice. If, in a great city like
Chicago, an intelligent and impartial jury
cannot be promptly impaneled, there is
something radically wrong either in the
method of selection or the liberty allowed to
lawyers, of delaying and muddling the pro
ceedings. In the Chicago case the tronble
seems to be mainly of the latter kind. But
thai is not the point to which the public at
tention should be first directed. The simple
fact is enough that when weeks must be con
sumed in impaneling one-third of a jury
something about the system has become so
unwieldly as to defeat its own purposes.
It should be universally recognized that
the pnrpose ot courts and juries is to secure
prompt and impartial justice "When the
resources of clever lawyers can postpone and
delay those purposes, as is being done here,
the necessity for radical reform in legal
methods is self evident.
THE ASSESSMENT MUDDLE.
The recently reported decision of the
courts against the rule of assessing real
estate on the valuation shown by the last
recorded sale, leaves the matter of assess
ments in a rather anomalous condition. A
thorough revision of assessments has just
been made by the city in which this rule is
supposed to have been observed throughout,
If the rule is completely set aside does it
not call for an entire going over of the lists
and scaling down the assessments. That
fceenis to be the view taken by one of the
assessors, who, it is said, does not think that
the task will be as great as might be thought
likely, because "the assessors have already
the names of nearly ail the kickers in the
city." But are only the kickers to have
their assessments reduced, while the non
kickers are left to pay the advanced assess
ments? That would place a decided prem
ium on the development of kicking.
ME. HUNTINGTON'S BUGABOOS.
It is not all pie to be a millionaire, Mr. C.
P. Huntington has discovered. He has sev
eral nightmares at present. The suitor for
his daughter's hand, Prince Hatzfeldt, is
one of them, and a newspaper that does not
pay is another. The paper is consuming Mr.
Huntington's money at a rapid rate, and
Prince Hatzfeldt is looking lor a chance to
do the same. He is not likely to get the
chance, however. Mr. Huntington has de
clined to furnish his princely would-be son-in-law
with the 51,000,000 to pay his debts of
honor, and has further intimated that Miss
Huntington's marriage portion would not
exceed a reasonable allowance yearly. It is
said that Prince Hatzfeldt, who is as proud
as the average penniless blackleg of royal
blood, has cooled in his courtship, and Miss
Huntington is likely to escape the frightful
peril of marriage with the scamp.
If Prince Hatzfeldt cannot be scared away
by Mr. Huntington's chilling remarks about
money matters, there is still a way to save
the lady in the case. Let Mr. Huntington
give Prince Hatzfeldt the unprofitable news
paper and take back to his arms his charm
ing daughter in exchange. Millionaires
will never learn that it is no easier to find a
decent prince than to run a newspaper.
MBS. I0GA2TS NOMINATION.
The suggestion has been made and is
Videly taken up by papers throughout the
country that Mrs. John A. Logan be ap
pointed to the place in the pension bureau,
which the President is finding rather diffi
cult to fill. While the idea may have been
intended as a joke in the first place it has
caught the fancy of the press so much that
it is now seriously urged. As a joke it
was a barren effort of wit. In its serious
aspect it represents the public respect and
good will for Mrs. Logan, but is open to
two objections. First, the position is be
neath a lady of national standing and dignity-like
Mrs. Logan, and second, in view
of the fact that the real trouble in the pen
sion office is its arrearages of business, there
is more reason for filling it with a person
whose application will catch up with the
business, than with a lady whose sex and
age would make it nearly impossible to dis
charge the volume of work that crowds that
bureau. Mrs. Logan's own utterances show
that she is not disposed to descend to the po
sition of a bureau chief at Washington.
A TBUST DISCXOSUBE.
The Cincinnati Commercial Gazette has
been making a big campaign projectile out
of the affidavits in a suit at Washington, in
which the Democratic candidate for Gov
ernor is stated to have acted as an agent in
trying to buy a brewery for the alleged
British syndicate. The Bepublican organ
is basing its attack on the idea that Mr.
Campbell sought in this transaction to sub
ject American industries to the domination
of British cold. That may do as an ante
election charge; but the Tital point is,
M The Dispatch has been pointing out
m B
with regard to many alleged trusts, that the
leally damaging allegation is that the pres
ent Democratio leader was trying to shape
the deal solely with reference to deluding
British Investors with bogus values.
The affidavit referred to alleges that the
brewer was offered about $100,000 more tnan
his property was worth.on condition that he
was to make a deed for that sum and pay
back the 5100.000 to Campbell. The pur
pose according to the declaration is to
enable them to sell the property to English
investors at an immense advance over its
true value. In other words the business of
Campbell and his partner was to make 5100,-
000, by selling a brewery which cost $250,
000 to the Englishmen for 5350,000 or more.
Now, this is hard on the Englishmen; but
except for the reputation of national busi
ness honesty, it is not a matter to which the
Americans need object. The Englishmen
who are buying large breweries at 30 per
cent above their true value will not control
the beer business. So long as bricks and
mortar are at the disposal of the general
public, anyone who chooses can put up new
breweries to compete with those owned by
the Englishmen at much less cost than their
property represents. "We doubt if the Com
mercial Gazette is able to make very much
more out of this assault on its opponent
than to make him ont a stockjobber.
But the light it throws on the brewery
trust negotiation is important as classifying
a large portion of the multitudinous so
called trust schemes. They are simply pro
jects to feed the gudgeons in investing and
speculating circles with paper values.
OUE STEAMSHIP HUES.
The information that a New York steam
ship company, operating a line of steamers
rnnning between New York and the Cuban
and Mexican ports has added three fine
American built vessels to its fleet, as given
in our special dispatches, has an interesting
bearing on the subject of onr trade with
South and Central American countries.
The first step in the development of such
trade is, obviously, the improvement of
communication with the countries to which
we desire to furnish manufactured goods in
exchange for tropical products and raw
materials. The enlargement of just such
lines as this one is, therefore, progress di
rectly in the line of the objects to be con
sidered by the Pan-American Congress.
The encouragement and stimulation of
such lines is an essential feature of a na
tional policy intelligently directed to the
extension of South American trade.
The declaration of the President of this
steamship company, that it would not have
made this increase of its fleet except for its
reliance on what the Republican adminis
tration will do for such enterprises, looks
like a confident discounting of the future.
But the fact that this American company
must carry on business in competition with
a Spanish company which receives a large
subsidy from the Spanish Government and
offers but about one-third the facilities of
the American line tells the whole story. If
our Government does not encourage and aid
American steamships in the needed work,
foreign steamers wtilch receive that aid and
encouragement will of course crowd the
American marine to the wall.
The question thns assumes at the start a
condition in whicd steamers of the United
States must be aided either by bounties or
subsidies, or the foreign steamers will con
tinue to hold the supremacy. Congress
must decide which shall continue to be our
choice.
POLITICAL CIGAHS.
The bright and shining New York Sun
turns the light of its rays upon the fact that
the illness of Private Secretary Halford is
dne to the polite endeavor of that accommo
dating functionary to smoke the cigars
which office seekers have brought to the
White House. This is declared to be all
wrong by the Sun, which asserts "Mr. Hal
ford is too precious to be wasted on rank
cigars. Give 'em to Wanamaker."
The fell purpose of the Sun in proposing
that the noxious nicotine shall be exhibited
to the Postmaster General is only too clear.
Having met with failure in its demand that
the Postmaster General shall be turned out
of the Cabinet, it desires to see him removed
by the slow and painful agonies of bad
cigars. But such an effort to introduce
Borgian methods into our public affairs is
balked in the outset by the irreproachable
character of the Postmaster General. Mr.
Wanamaker has no small vices, and while
he may thus be deprived of the pleasure and
pain alike of knowing bad cigars from good
ones, he is also protected from insidious at
tempts to wreck his public usefulness by
making him the recipient of the nicotian
offerings of ambitious fine workers.
Nevertheless the esteemed Sun made
nearly a center shot designating the Post
office Department as the place where Mr.
Halford shonld send the bad cigars, in self
protection. Mr. Wanamaker can pass on
the political cigars to his assistant. Noth
ing is too rank for Clarkson.
A HALT TO CHINESE FLIBTS.
Washington society has never joined in
the cry "The Chinese must go." It has
been quite the thing to entertain the young
Chinese attaches of the Celestial Embassy,
and although it is a serious statement to
make off-hand, we believe the clothes of
Washington's greatest have been washed in
Chinese laundries. Society at the Capital
may continue its intercourse with the pig
tailed laundrymen, but the Chinese Minis
ter has ordered that his young men shall no
longer look upon the maidens who are not
almond-eyed. It is a sort of left-handed
compliment to the Washington women.
rThe Chinese Minister has issued the order
formally that members of his Legation shall
cease their incursions into American societv.
It is not the custom of Chinese statesmen
to explain their motives, but in this case
they are too plain to be misunderstood.
The order was issued because the budding
diplomats of China took too kindly to flirta
tion. They lell victims to the fascination of
the Washington flirt of the feminine gender.
Possibly in the pursuit of this graceful art
the unsuspecting Mongolians allowed state
secrets to escape. In some quiet corner of a
dimly-lighted conservatory the fate of an
Imperial plan may have been jeopardized.
The potency of a cup of tea is well known
wnen a charming woman pours it, It is
small wonder that the impressionable young
men in blue silks have been indiscreet over
their cups tea cups we mean. So it comes
to pass that the lair dames and maidens of
Washington will have to content themselves
with the Japanese or the curious Coreans
when they desire a change ot color in flirta
tion. The financial reports assert that money
is getting somewhat stronger in New York.
This permits a hope that New York money
m3y eventually become strong enough to do
a little something for the New York Expo
sition scheme.
The practice of making railway passen
gers pay extra on trains when they do not
have tickets, and letting them collept the
excess at the main station when they have
finished their trip, got a severe setback in
the courts yesterday. A verdict of 5250
was given against the railroad company
which enforced the practice. This makes
the rule cost more than it comes to, apd we
have no doubt the railroad managers will
discover the advisability of dropping it.
Otherwise, people will be rather glad to
subject themselves to being put off the train
at the regular price of 5250 per ejection.
Concebnino the fact that a dog and a
man went through the Niagara rapids Sun
day, it may be necessary to point the
ground for general satisfaction in the tact
that the iour-legged pup came out alive.
The declaration of a Philadelphia co
temporary that notwithstanding the con
dition of the water of that city, the
health reports show a total of deaths ''much
lower in proportion to population than any
large city in the world, with the exception
of London, where, by the way, there is a
very similar sensational complaint about
the terrible pollution of the water supply,"
seems calculated to raise the question
whether to insure the highest conditions of
health in cities, a diluted compound of
sewerage used as a beverage may not be the
most salutary tonic.
The adequate explanation of Senator
Ingalls' remarkable ideas of the increase of
wealth in this nation is furnished by the
suggestion that the Senator must have been
booming corner lots in Kansas.
It is interesting to learn from the St.
Louis i?epu6Jie that "a more intellectual,
a more genuine, a more sincere American
than Jefferson Davis does not live has not
lived in this Bepublic." "We presume
that the able-bodied Jtepublic would not
shirk from the obvious conclusion that the
way to have a genuine, intellectual and
sincere American Republic is to revive the
defunct Southern Confederacy with Jeffer
son Davis at its head.
The intimations that Eobert E. Pattison
may be a Democratic quantity for Governor
next year will put the Republicans on their
guard as to the necessity oi nominating their
best and strongest man.
The Baltimore and Ohio's monthly re
port shows net earnings for last month of
5870,000, or about f 10,000,000 per year. It
will cow be in order for the New York news
papers to tell some more yarns about the
utterly worthless stock of the road.
The report that Mexico has Increased
her tariff on goats indicates that our sister
Bepublic is thoroughly committed to the
protection of play bills.
Another West India cyclone is reported
to be hovering along the Southeastern coast;
but the assurance is given that an anti
cyclone is standing guard off Cape Hatteras
prepared to knock the violence out of its
boisterous antagonist.
The sudden change from the heat of Sun
day to the frosty air of last night is one of
the idiosyncracies of our unequaled cli
mate.
The scheme of appropriating the relief
funds contributed to the Spokane Falls suf
ferers is a rather meaner project of robbery
than one to get big and prearranged prices
for work done to help the overwhelming
city of Johnstown.
PEOPLE OP PROMINENCE.
Geouge Eliot was so religious when a
young woman that she would not go to the
theater or opera or even an oratorio, although
she was devoted to music
Mr. Henkt James is sometimes spoken of
as an American novelist. Mr. James, it is true,
was born in the United States, but his father
was an Englishman, and ho himself tries to
pass for one.
Rev. J. W. Haedt, author of "How to be
Happy Though Married," is a military chap
lain, with a ruddy.complexion and a long, flow
ing beard. He keeps his good things for his
books, and his conversation is without wit or
cleverness.
George W. Cable made himself so un
popular by his Creole caricatures that the
French children of New Orleans used to hoot
at him on the streets and pelt him with stones.
He was finally compelled to leave the city to
escape this intolerable annoyance. Mr. Cable
is a small, delicate looking man.
Amelie Rives, who won an unenviable
reputation by her kissing novel, "The Quick or
the Dead," has an ungraceful figure, crowned
by a beautiful face. Indeed, if the truth must
be told, she is short, somewhat dumpty, and
although she is very fond of horseback riding,
she does not look at all well in the saddle.
Ik Mabvel said, 30 years ago, tbat the liter
ary men of New York were "forever quarrel
ing and barking at each other like so many
apes of Siam." That has all been changed.
New York literary men nowadays are en
caged in the more graceful, hut less interest
ing, occupation of blowing each other's trum
pets by the complaisant permission of the
magazine editors.
Bishop H. Pinckney Noethhop, of Char
leston, S. C, is one of the few genuine Ameri
cans who have been raised to the purple in the
Catholic Church in this country. He is a mem
ber of an old Charleston family, and is con
nected with the Pinckneys, Bellingers, andfl
other South Carolina families. He is ia years
old, tall, straight as an Indian, with a very dis
tinguished air. He is a splendid talker, a fine
horseman, and manages his see with great
ability.
Lady Bla-ciie Mukphy, the eldest daugh
ter of the proud Earl of Gainsbdlrongb, eloped
with her father's organist, Thomas T. Mnrphy,
a blonde young Irishman. When the Earl
heard of the mesalliance made by his daughter,
he disowned her, forbade her return to her an
cestral borne, and cut her off from all the
heritage of the family. Lady Blanche and her
husband came to this country, where she made
a poor living by writing for magazines. She
experienced in its full the transformation that
takes place when an earl's daughter becomes a
poor man's wife.
THE! GO TO OTHER SCHOOLS.
Orphans to be Taken From the Northern
Home and Plnced Elsewhere.
rSFECIJLI. TILEGKAM TO THE DISPATCH. 1
Habbisbubo, September 18. The Soldiers'
Orphan Commission in this city to-day decided
to withdraw the pupils in the Northern Home
for the Friendless and place them in other
schools leased by tbe commission by Decem
ber 1 next, notwithstanding a proposition had
been received from the management of tbe
Philadelphia institution expressing a desire to
retain the cbildren orsoldiers in tho school and
to take 100 additional scholars.
As the Northern Home had previously re
fused to accommodate any soldiers' orphans
except females, and the commission was
obliged to lease a syndicate school (tbat at
Mount Joy) owing to the position of the borne,
tbe proposition was rejected apd the deter
mination reached to have no further dealings
with it after the date indicated. Hy that time
1,400 pupils will have to be accommodated by
the commission. The contract for furnishing
all tbe boys clothing was awarded to-day to a
Philadelphia party at $7 a suit.
The Modest Mlsssnrlnn.
From the St. Louis Globe-Democrat 1
The country will please observe that when an
office is tendered to a Missouri man he doesn't
seize it in a greedy, vulgar fashion. He looks
at it with an air of ease and self-control that
bespeaks tbe true patriot and gentleman;
and, after due deliberation, be declines, with
thanks.
No Partisanship In This.
From tbe Atlanta Constitution.
The New York Iforlft is in favor pf civil ser
vice reform. So are we, jf competent Demo
crats are to hold the offices.
THE TOPICAL TALKEE.
Fair Foundation for n Poem on Johnstown's
Trng-cdv A Lover's Shrewd Device
Diacnoses Extraordinary A Tiny Or
acle When the timecomes In the very dim and very
distant future for the great American poet to
arise in his strength and snatch from the mere
earth of prose the tragic tale of Johnstown's
flood and write it on the heavens in letters of
starry gold, he will not Improbably congratu
late himself that he has such a reliable guide
and provider of fact athishandas "The Official
History of tbe Johnstown Flood,"by Frank Con
nellyand George C. lenks. Theaforesaid great
American poet will have the advantage of hi3
predecessors who have attempted similar
tasks. Tennyson had no such reliable memo
rial of the great Arthur to aid him in writing
the immortal "Idylls of the King." and taking
one by one each of the heroic poets of tne past
we find that thoy all had to employ imagina
tion to a far greater extent than the genius
who shall attempt the tragedy oftheCone
xnaugh. It is a very complete history of all the inci
dents of tbat terrible disaster. The actual
story of the flood itself irgraphicalty told, with
enough spirit and intensity and without exag
geration. It would be hard to magnify the
horror of that tatal finale of May, the month
of flowers. The newspapers at the time told
all there was to be told, but necessarily the tale
was disjointed. In this book the history pro.
ceeds evenly and completely from cbapterHo
chapter, illuminated by excellent photo-engravings
and a full index.
The charitable work which saved the sur
vivors of Johnstown's population is aUo care
fully described, and a list of the identified dead
arranged alphabetically is another valuable
feature of the book. As a memorial of the
greatest calamitv this part of the world has
ever seen the book fulfils a worthy purpose.and
it deserves the official indorsement bestowed
upon it by General Hastings. The book is well
made, printed on the best paper and sensibly
bound.
In one of the iron mills in this city there is a
gallant furnace man, who is in love. This is
not told as anything unusual. A furnace is a
capital tutor for a lover, for it teaches him how
to sigh. But this lover is at a sad disadvantage
he cannot read at all. Tho fair one to whom
bis heart is pledged writes him fearfully long
letters. They come often. A young man reads
them to the ardent lover. Some one rallied
the latter the other day upon his being forced
to get another to read his love letters to him.
"Sure, an' the young man knows nothin at
all about thim lethers," replied the loyer, "for
whin he reads 'em to me, I put my fingers for
ninst his ears, and he can't hear wan wnrd he
reads."
.
Febhaps this may be interesting to doctors
.of all schools.
A man suffering with dropsy in one of his
lower limbs was brought into the hospital. An
elderly doctor examined the patient first, and
then, by way of explaining the pathology of the
case to several younger doctors present, he
said: "Gentlemen, it is evident that this man
is suffering from dropsy, because bis legs hang
down, '
V
As tue gray clouds were closing in the sun
set j esterday a beautiful Manchester horse car
gave a splendid imitation of moving over the
Sixth street bridge. The car was filled with
tired clerks and young women. One of the
latter was so young that her face was nearly
lost in a big poke bonnet, and she sat upon the
lap of an elderly lady presumably her mother.
Presently a newsboy poked his head into the
car and cried: "Here yer,are. All about the
ball game!"
From the recesses of the big poke bonnet
came a small voice shrilly: "We don't want to i
hear all about the ball gamel"
And above the fare gong's exclamation and
the rattle of the loose windows, there arose a
wave of applause and laughter.
SOME OTHER PLACE FOR TANNER.
Small Chance of the Ex-Commissioner Be
fnjr Appointed District Recorder.
IEITCU1 TELEGRAM TO THE niBPATen.l
Washington, September 18,-It is so gener-
aUy believed here that Merrill, of Massachu-
setts, will be the next Pension Commissioner,
that speculation in regard to other candidates
for the appointment has practically ceased; hut
whether this. belief has any more definite
ground than the fact that the office has been
tendered to him Is not clearly developed. It is
certainly true tbat some of tbe other would-be
commissioners have ceased to push themselves j
lor tne place, xne eitort oi ms irienas to se
cure for Commissioner Tanner the office of)
Recorder of Deeds for the District now appears;
aoomea to ena in iauure.
So strong is the feeling in the district in op
position to further conveyance of district
offices to persons not citizens of the district
and such vigorous expression has been given ti
it during tne last aay or two, that it is though)
the President will hardly risk going counte:
to lb
A T0UTBFDL MDiXCHAUSEiV
Begins a Career of Crime by Stealing ana
Running Awny to New York.
tSPECIAI. TELEGRAM TO THE DISPATCH.!
New Yoke, September 18. During the hard
rain on Tuesday night a policeman found a
well-dressed boy sitting on the doorstep of 33
Fast Tenth street. He said he was George It
Keegan, 9 years old, tbe son of a scow worker
in Williamsburg. His mother, he said, died
tbat morning after receiving tbe news of hi i
father's death in a New York hospital. Afte
the funeral his aunt, Mrs. Hynes, gave him
cents and told him to go away and never shov
his face again. He crossed over to this city
roamed around in the rain, and finally sat dowi
exhausted on tbe stoop where the pohcemai
found him. He was taken to Matrou Webb.
To-dav George R. King, a Philadelohia mer
chant, arrived in search of bis 9-year-old soi
George R King, Jr., who had ran away yesterf
day with some money that bis mother had en
U31CU IU U1UJ. JUC IUGUUUCU IUC JUVCU1
mi
.aiunciiaasen as iiis ooy, ana iook mm nome.
PERCHED ON THE PIANO.
Frightened Ladles Witness the Attack oia.
Cat Upon a Rabbir.
Lancaster, O., September 18. A remark
able and amusing incident occurred last even
ing at a bouso on the corner of Broad and Wal
nut streets. A small party of young folks were
deepIy"absorbed in cribbage, when the game
suddenly terminated in terrific commotion,
midst the screams of tbe young ladies and
rush for the top of tbe piano. A wild rabbit
tore tbrougb the room, followed by a huge tom
cat and tbe house dog.
Tbe rabbit made desperate efforts to elude its
pursuers and frantic lumps up the wall, when
Mr. Thomas Cat struck it with bis paw in tho
eye and so blinded it that it was an easy matter
for Mr. Edly, of Pittsburg, to capture the prize
and carry it off to his hotel as a trophy of the
evening.
DIED ON HER WEDDING T0DE.
Sad Termination of tbo Honeymoon of an
Oil City Couple.
1SFECIAL TELXGBAM TO THE DISPATCH.1
Toledo, September 18. Mrs. J. H. Cuthbort,
of Oil City, a bride of two weeks, died sud
denly of heart disease early this norning. Mr.
Cuthbert, is the Third Auditor of the Standard
Oil Company.
The pair were on their wedding tour. The
remains were shipped to Oil City to-day.
A Thief With a Good Character.
From the Washington 1'ost.;
It is pleasant to read that the bank president
who ran away from Texarkana, Ark., with
37,000 ot other people's money was "a man of
exemplary habits and unimpeachable in
tegrity." We beg the distinguished privilege
of congratulating tho several hundred de
positors who lost about all they had we con
gratulate them that their money was stolen by
a truly good man and not by some miserable
thief.
To Reinmo With a Reduced Capital.
Washington, September 18. The First
National Bank of Mount Gilead, O., tbe capi
tal of which was recently impaired by forgeries
committed by one of its officers, has been
authorized by the Controller ot the Currency
to resume business with a reduced capital. The
impairment of tbe bank's capital was made
good by a 20 per cent assessment on the stock
olders. First Case on Retford.
From the Nashville American, j
A Chicago man ha? forwarded 8200 to the
Secretary of tbe Treasury to be placed in the
"Conscience fund." Is this a sly bid for the
World's FairT It is the fljst time on record
that a Chicago man was ever known to turd
loose anything.
GOSSIP PEOH THE CAPITAL.
A Lawyer Who Has Had Enough of Con
cress nfflce a Luxury Only the Rich
Cnn Afford West Virginia and the Tariff
Question Tennessee Pleased With Har
rison. ISFKCHt. TELIQBAM TO THE DISFATCH.1
Washington, September 18. The number
of Congressmen who drop into town from day
to day is increasing, as they begin to look into
questions of legislation and the more momen
tous question of domestic arrangements for
the coming session. Ex-Congressman Snyder,
of West Virginia, is also here, but says he
never wants to come to Congress again, as it
becomes more and more impossible every year
for any but a rich man to afford the luxury of
the office. On this subject he says: "There are
a great many drafts on Congressmen, however,
known only to those who have served in tbat
capacity. In the, first place, the necessary ex
pense of securing a nomination is considera
ble. Then the expenses of the campaign have
to be borne. Then ft costs a good part of one's
salary to support his family, whether be keeps
them at home and runs out to see them occa
sionally, or keeps them here. Then every con
stituent who wants to borrow 10 thinks he has
a lien on your 55,000 salary, and you are over
run with applications frfim charitable under
takings in yonr district So you are lucky If
?ou come out even at the end of the year. 'Ihe
ife of a Congressman onhts one, too, for a time
for the routine work necessary to make a suc
cess of the law. Bnt I am getting down to it,
and. personally, I have no desire to return to
Congress again."
Lots of Contested Seats.
Mr. Snyder was asked about the protective
tariff feeling in West Virginia and replied:
"General Hancock was undoubtedly right
when he said that the tariff was a local issue.
While West Vireinla Is not a protective State,
In the general sense of the term, our people de
sire a high tariff on coal, wood and lumber.
On the question of protection the Democrats
have undoubtedly been losing ground. Then.
too, immigration has largely Increased the Re
publican vote in the State. With the excep
tion oi representative Wilson, the seat of
every other member is contested, and not a'
single one of the other three Democrats has a
majority of more than 25. If I remember cor
rectly the original count gave each of the three
districts to the Republicans."
"What do you think of the outlook for the
Democracy?" was asked.
"If the right men are nominated I think they
are good. The poople have not fonndthe
prosperous times they expected under the Re
publican administration. Take my State, for
instance. Every industry, except the Inmber
trade, which is booming, is completely
paralyzed. Then there hare been ten times as
many applications for office under General
Hamsun as under any other Republican Presi
dent, and the number of the disappointed and
dissatisfied is enormous. It would not surprise
me at all if the House should become Demo
cratic two years hence, and if Governor Hill is
nominated in '62 there is every reason the
Democrats should be fully reinstated."
A Southern Congressman's Vicw.
One of the Southern Congressmen In the:
city 13 Representative Phelan, of Tennessee.
The appointments of President Harrison, in
Western Tennessee," said Mr. Phelan, "have!
been good. The persons who have been given
the offices, while they are unqualified Repub
licans, are clean, decent men, and that is more
than can usually be said of Republican ap
pointments in the "State." Mr. Phelan has
very pronounced views on the race question in
the Southern States, and intended at the last
session of Congress to make a speech, setting
forth bis views at length on the subject. "The
domination of the white man," said he, "is
simply a question of civilization. To give the
negroes control of the law-making power
would invite every kind of extravagance: to
give them charge of the courts would substi
tute corruption lor justice; to make them sher
ffs would put authority in the hands of brntal
gnorance, As it happens the negroes are Re
publicans. If they were to walk in and seize
the Democratic party the white people would
leave it, cpme wbat might. In my district the
negroes are fairly intelligent. Yet. not over 3
1 per cent of them can read. Hundreds of them
uau uu luca wuu w3 t uuujjju ifi x acsiuoui in
the last election. They bad heard the name of
Harrison ana tnougnt it was senator Harris.
JLots of them voted for him in consequence.
Some voted for me, and some also for Judge
Bigelow. Everybody has his nostrum as a cure
Ufor tbe race troubles, but the first thing to be
done is to educate them for the duties of citi
jenmP-
History Repeating Itself.
I "The charge that the South has imposed on
the negroes is simply a repetition of history.
'Wherever the Anglo-Saxon has gone he has
invariably imposed on the weaker race by
force and fraud," said he. Mr. Phelan,
although elected according to the returns by
8,00 majority, has his seat Contested. "Mr.
Eaton, the contestant," he stated, "is a brother
of the ex-Commissioner of Ednration. He is
a man of considerable wealtb, but has made
himself very unpopular to the people of Mem
phis by his affiliations with tbe negro. He con
tests the seat, I am sure, because of his hatred
of tbe people there. I do not know how far
the Republicans will carry their partisanship,
hut I would be perfectly willing to let all tbe
Democrats withdraw and have them sit in
judgment on the case alone under oath."
GOOD, BAD AND INDIFFERENT.
All Sorts of Securities Made Up the Bulk of
John Vnssnr's Wealtb.
(SPECIAL TELEGRAM TO TUB DISPATCH.
Potgiikeepsie. September 18. John Guy
Vassar's will, as has already been announced,
is to come beiore the courts for construction.
In a general way it may be stated that the
estate of Mr. Vassar consists mostly of securi
ties of various kinds. An Inventory, which ac
companies tho complaint, shows tbat be owned
stocks and bonds of almost all kinds, some
good, some bad and some doubtful. For
instance, the list of stocks comprises Iron, ore
land and loans: 1 steamship, 1 gas, 1 bridge (tbe
t'oughkeepsie Bridge Company). 1 canal, 1 pe
troleum securitv and 10 valued at more than
par, 2 at par.23 below par. 2unknown, or doubt
ful, and 17 are set down as worthless.
There are a number of questions of detail to
be decided which are all summed up in 23 dis
tinct statements and requests contained in the
complaint.
A GORILLA AT LARGE.
A Strange Creature Frightening the Natives
of Southern Indiana.
ECKEKTT, lND., September IS. A naked,
hairy creature, which from descriptions given
by reliable persons who have seen him, must be
a young gorilla, was seen recently by various
persons in the woods and cornfields six miles
south of here. Mrs. Kate Knight and Oscar
Grant, besides others, are the names given as
eye-witnecses, and each person named saw him
on different occasions.
Robinson's show is on the river between New
Albany acd Evansville, and it is supposed a
gorilla escaped from tbem.
A Yery Lucky Shot.
From the Chicago Times.I
A New York farmer fired a shot at the re
flection of a burglar in a mirror and shivered
the glass. When he came to replace the mir
ror he found a niche in the wall back of it
wherein his grandfather had secreted 615,000 in
cash. The farmer mav go about the old farm
house shooting at every stationary mirror in
the place, but be won't find any more such
plants as that. They are rare.
PLATS THAT ARE COMING.
AT the Bijou Theater next week ''The TJ. S.
Mail," which has been so much talkod of, will
be seen for the first time in Pittsbnrg. It is a
farce comedy in the nature of a good-tempered
skit on tbe postal service. Wherever it has
been seen it has been hailed with roars of
laughter, and its novelty in plot, style and
specialties have been highly praised. In the
cast is that wonderfully clever actress. Miss
Kate Davis, and Frank David, the comedian,
beside a dozen other actors of note- It will be
staged with great care the postoffice scene is
carried by tbe company and tbe dresses of
tbe customary band of pretty girls are said to
be astonishing. The box office sale of seats be
gins to-day. There has been a great demand
for seats already.
Miss Mabie Wainwbight will present
herself to the Pittsburg public alone this year.
She will be at the Grand Opera House next
week. With a good company she intends to
give us Shakespeare's "Twelfth Night." In
other cities where she has played this season,
notably in Chicago, the press has praised her
production of tbe play highly. It is stated
that the scenery and costumes will be accurate
and rich.
Gbacte fistMETT. in "The Waifs of. New
York," Is the attraction underlinedf or Harris'
Theater next week. The advance sale begins
this morning.
AT Harry Williams' Academy next week the
favorite, Tony Pastor, will appear afr the bead
of his own company.
STEONGEE THAN FIR8WATER,
The Wonderful Natural Fluid Discovered In
a Texas Well It Makes Negroes Dance
and Affects White Folks Strangely
Scientists Sorely Puzzled.
A discovery of immense scientific interest
has recently Been made rear Wharton, Tex a
discovery which it Is thought will add a hith
erto unknown element to the 65 already famil
iar to the chemist. Mr; Chudleigh Mason, a
prominent cotton, planter, living about five
miles irom town, while boring an artesian well
on hfs place struck water a few days ago at a
depth of 215 feet. A powerful stream was
thrown up with a loud report and a slight
trembling of the surrounding earth. Mr.
Mason, in order to test the quality of the water,
drang a glass of it, and the negro workmen also
crowded about and drank freely of the water,
which was found to be very cold and good,
though possessed of a slight unfamiliar flavor,
which was, however, not disagreeable.
Wihin a quarter of an hour, or even less,
after drinking the water, Mr. Mason began to
feel strange twitchiugs in the muscles of the
face, and bis workmen also commenced to com
plain of the same sensation. This twitching
soon extended to the arms and legs, increasing
all tbe while 'in violence, until at last the
negroes cast themselves dawn, crying that they
had been conjured, and rolled about on the
ground shrieking aload and writhing with
hideous contortions of the face and body. As
tbe jerKing and jumping of the muscles of the
limbs grew more and more violent, all hands
sprang up and joined in a wild, uncontrollable
dance, or rather bopping up and down like so
many disturbed frogs.
Men Compelled to Dance.
Mr. Masqn, describing his sensation, says tbat
he was conscious of a feeling of great (exhilara
tion and an increased acuteness of every sense.
The sight of the leaping negroes, who were too
frightened to realize that they were suffering
only from fear, and their cries and shrieks pro
voked him to bursts of laughter that sounded
almost maniacal. Mrs. Mason, seeing her hus
band's extraordinary behavior, became alarm
ed, and, running out, attempted to hold him
down, but, though be endeavored to assist her
bv clingin? with all his strength to a Tinat- it
A- was founcf impossible to restrain him.
i nis uance was Kept up, says a Philadelphia
Times correspondent, nntil sheer exbanstion
caused the involuntary participants to fall
prostrate to the earth, where they lay and
kicked for some minutes, after which they fell
Into a deep sleep. This sleep was the heavy,
dreamless slumber that follows intoxication,
and lasted for several hours, but left them with
clear heads and no evil consequences beyond a
soreness of tbe back and limbs and a pain in
the face resembling neuralgia, which, however,
soon passed away.
An Unknown Element.
Mr. Mason sent a jug of the water to Houston
to have it analyzed, but tbe chemists of that
city profess themselves at a complete loss to
account for one of the elements entering Into
the composition of the water, and give as their
unanimous opinion that it may be added to the
number of known elements as a sixty-sixth.
This element imparts to the water a beautiful
bright blue tinge of a metallic luster, and gives
it a taste more like tbat of fresh cider than any
thing else. When the water is heated this ele
ment passes off in a colorless gas of a most
agreeable odor, resembling the perfume of
tuberoses, only more penetrating and pungent,
and so powenul that a gallon of the water sim
mering over a slow fire Vill render a whole
house fragrant for hours. Taken from the well
and left to stand, however, the water loses its
beautiful blue color and thickens to the con
sistency of turpentine, with a faint greenish
tinge, and will, when drunk or inhaled, produce
violent nausea and vomiting, accompanied by a
n.tuujijJK ui uiu ueau sdu a iauure ox me signs
uw uciiiig, nrmuii Ionia lor pours.
Negroes Regard It With Awe.
The negroes about have christened the well
Devil's Water," and regard it with snpersti-
ous awe, ana, witn one exception, cannot be
evauea upon to even approach it. This ex
ception 13 an old darkey familiarly known as
TJncle Dence, who Is actually becoming a con
filmed drunkard on tbe water, on which he In-
dtlges in a daily spree in spite of all attempts
tdkeep him from drinking it. He claims that
be' feels younger and spryer after each dance.
Many of the crowds that come dallv from all
parts of the county, and even from adjacent
ones, to visit tbe well have the curiosity to taste
the water to judge of its singular qualities for
themselves, and it Is curious to observe the
different ways in which it affects Individuals;
for, while the twitching of the nerves and mus
cles and the uncontrollable propensity to dance
are uummou 10 an, me enect on tne minds Of
different persons is of endless variety.
Startling Effects on Drinkers.
One man will shout for joy, betraylns all the
abandonment of a child; another will weep
with a gentle melancholy. A third will sing
hymns and perhaps a fourth at the same
time will be praying aloud. Your correspond
ent found himself, reciting whole pages of
blank verse from the different poets that he
bad been unconscious of having retained In bis
memory. The effect on the spirits is delightful
in the extreme, a feeling of exhilaration and
lightness pervading the whole system, and the
senses take on an acuteness and refinement
that is most remarkable.
By the advice of Prof. Deichstag; one of the
ablest chemists of Houston, a hermetically
sealed jar of this wonderful liquor has been
forwarded to the Society of Chemists and
Pharmacists in New York for their careful
analyzation, which process, when completed,
he is confident will confirm bis opinion of the
value and uniqueness of tbe discovery.
PATENTS ON D1YERS DEVICES.
What Inventors of Three States Have Been
Tinkering With of Late.
The following patents were granted to West
ern Pennsylvania, Eastern Ohio, and West
Virginia inventors on Tuesday, September 17,
as furnished by O. D: Levis, patent attorney.
No. HI Fifth avenue, Pittsburg:
vvllUon Alger, Bloomsburg, la., sconrlnand
decorating cereals; Henry Aiken, Homestead,
machine for shaping metal sheets and for making
metal ties; Amos fioncher, Monclova, U.. railway
switch; H. ti. Camp.Tallmadge, O., paring block;
C A. Donals, Zanesvllle, O., automatlo pole
changer: John Dick, Meadvllle, steam boiler;
J. 1'. bates, uarrea. fa., spring- moior; v. a.
(Mm, Bellevue, o.
, tidy holder:
j. a.
. Uochnaner.
Eastlienin, fa, nay lore; w. w.iiigniree,nno
bard, U., tension machine; Darld Kerr, Frank
ford, Fa., woven fabrlcfo S King and H. II.
Swaney. McKeesport, regulator and cutoff: Will
lam Klahr, llyerstown, Fa., steam washer: Henry
Klceraan. 1'lttsburg, nut lock: 0'. F. and
V. I.lng.Flttsburg.formingtbe necks offrultjirs:
C. A. Mahle, Corry, machine for making wooden
enrrrcombs and for brush block boring machine;
G. McKensle, W. Van Fort and W. I. Miller:
Heaver, advertising and street announcing ap
paratus: H. O. Morrow. Bradford, Head pro
tector; Jacob Mlsslcy, Florin. Fa , transplanter;
Christ Pelfer, Allegheny, metallurgical furnace;
J. W. Fenfleld, Wlllougnby, O., brick- machine;
Ernest Host. Davton. (.. hydrocarbon burner:
Herman Scbulze-Berge, Rochester. Fa., furnace
for heating glassware and apparatus for reheating
glassware, (rank 1 Vlocum and H. W. Lash,
Pittsburg, treating molten metal with natural gas;
F. W. Starr, torrv. multiple boring machine;
Dayld Stelner, Adamsburg. Fa., not lock; J. E.
Stevenson, Allegheny, stand for carboys; D. II.
Streeper, Norristovrn, high and low water alarm:
inanes ana jp. symona. jjniayeue. xa, paper
making machine; Warren Van Vleet, Slroudj
bnrg. Fa., combination tool; William Williams,
Jermyn, Fa., steam actuated valve; Bvron Zim
merman, Belle Center, O., farm gate; W.W.Hnff
man, Houston, o shock or bunilie tier; 11. .
Llckron, Olenford. O., spring bed: S. to. Shirk,
Bylialla, O., harness loop; Joseph Kaon, Akron,
roofing tile.
Not Difficult In Chicago.
From the Chicago Herald. 1
A jury in the Cronin case will hardly be
found until the bailiffs bring in a dozen men
whose educational deficiencies compel them, in
place of their name, to sign with an X.
IRISH FOLK SONG.
Did I stand on tbe bald top ofNefln,
And my hundred-times loved one with me,
AY e should nestle together as safe In
This shade as the birds on one tree.
From yonr month snch a music ia shaken
When yon speak, It has sharpened my pain,
And my eyelids by sleep are forsaken.
And I seek for my slumber in vain.
Bnt were I on theflelda of the ocean
1 should sport on Its infinite room,
I fchonld plow through the billows' commotion.
Though my friends should look dark at my
doom.
For tbe flower of all maidens of magic
Is beside me where'er I may be.
And my heart like a coal is extinguished!
Hot a woman takes pity on me.
Oh, how well for the birds in all weather,
How they rise up on hljth In the air.
And then sleep upon one bough together
Without sorrow or tronble or care.
But so it Is not In this world
For myself and my thousand times fair,
Far away, far apart from each other,
How each day rises barren and barel
Say wbat dost thou think oi the heavens
When the heat overmasters the day.
Or what when the stream of tbe tide
Bises up in the face of the bay?
Even so Is the man who has given
An Inordinate love-gift away,
Lite s tree on a mountain, all riven.
Without blossom or leaflet or spray.
Bottom Pilot.
j ,UX-Iar &&t --."" $LiJl$-iM- ,, ' iff'frrV-,' firfSsSf-BT ", , , Ti -fr 1 ' Tpfl 1 ."WJtuMi 1 '' gaBBs9HgSBBBBBaW
fJafWitej. SiJssTsSlv-iisfcgJigW
, '-SIW8T K1W T0RK ffSTJ.
Mrs. McGanfey on tne Warpath.
INEWTOaKStrEIiBSFICIALS.
Netv YobK, September K-Batney MeGte
ley stole 19 from hij wife's bureau drawer las
Sunday and got drunk. After looking for bJa
three days and three nights, Mrs. McGanley
fonnd hjm. washing down the decks ot a Jersey
Canal boat. He was pennllest and still drunk.
Mrs. McGanley bared her rigat arm and dealt
him a blow which laid him flai 0a his back.
Then she caught up a loose piece, of flanking,
turned him over, spanked him hard and finally
beat him senseless. She knocked, down a deck
hand whq had helped 'McGanley spend her
money, and pounded the captain-tin be roared
for help. A policeman, who heard tbe captain's
shouts, arrested and locked up Mrs. UcGanlej.
after a running rough and tumble ugh of 15
minutes. In her efforts to escape arrest Mrs.
McGanley tried to drown and strangle herself.
She was held on a half dozen charges.
Scandinavian Delegates Coming.
A private cablegram from Copenhagen to
day announced the departure, on the steamer
Thingvalla, of the Norwegian and Danish dele
gation who are to participate in the Interna
tional Marine Conference to be held in Wash'
ington next month.
A President's Son Married.
Clement Acton drlscoln, son of the President
of tbe Inman steamship line, and assistant
manager of tbe line's Chicago office, and Miss
Genevieve Spncg Ludlow, daughter of Colonel
William Ludlow, U. 8. A., were married at
Grace Church this morning. All the Inman
line craft in port Were dressed with flags in
celebration of tbe event. General W: T. Sher
man was one of the wedding guests,
Predicts a Big Molarity for ForaUer.
Ex Congressman Amos Townsend, who ar
rived here frqm the West last sight, has been
to-day reviewing the political situation In Ohio
for the information of everyone, who asked blm
abont it He is sure that Foraker will be
elected Governor of .Ohio -by at least 30,060
majority, and is willing to bet on 40,000. Ha
thinks tbat Tanner's removal Is generally ap
proved by the G. A. R. veterans ot Ohio. Mr.
Townsend also dented that Senator John Sher
man was suiKy.
Talking for Tariff Reform.
Congressman Benton McMillen,of Tennessee,
is here talking loudly for tariff reform. He
thinks that the tariff issue will keep the South
solid, and says all the South wants ot President
Hairiion is that he should let it alone.
Bananas in the Ocean.
The steamship Vertumnus is still stack fast
on the Long Island coast, near Long Beach.
Early this morning her Captain and crew and
several life savers boarded her and began to
throw overboard her cargo ot tropical fruits.
Fifteen thousand bunches of bananas and L50Q
barrels and boxes of oranges were tossed into
tbe water. This afternoon hundreds of men
and boys were1 wading about in the Surf secur
ing and bringing 'to shore the fruit thrown
overboard.
A Preacher Tarns Thlf.
The Rev. George Washington Williams.
colored politician, orator, carpet cleaner, book
agent and preacher, was charged with larceny
ip a Brooklyn police court this morning. Mrs.
Adelaide Busbnell gave the Re v. Williams 13
of her brnssels and velvet carpets to clean
White She was in the country, yilllams pawned
the carpets for several hundred dollars, shut
up his carpet cleaning establishment and went
West, A Brooklyn detective caught him in
Buffalo and brought him back to the city last
night. Thb morning the" Rev. Mr. Williams
acknowledged the theft aqd was held over to
the grand jury. Williams is the most eloquent
colored preacher In this region. He stumped
the State for Cleveland last tall with remark
able success. He made a good income out of
religion, politics and cleaning carpets, but high
living emptied his pockets and ultimately
caused him to steal.
CHAIRMAN EISNER PERPLEXED.
He Finds It Difficult to Figaro Pot a Demo
cratic Majority.
From the FhliadelphU Inquirer.
Up In one of the dlmly-ligbted rooms In the
Girard House Chairman K. P. Kisner and
Candidate E. A. Bigler sat at a little table
figuring in a rather disconsolate manner on
how tbe Republican majority id Pennsylvania
could be kept below 60.000. The problem was
evidently a difficult one for both statesmen.
Mr. Bigler hair stood on end worse than
Hamlet's when his father's ghost unfolded its
pitiful tale, and the cheerful Chairman was
mopping bis forehead with a towel is order to
save the hotel from a general inundation.
Scattered about tbe floor were several sheets
of paper, showing bow easy it would be to
make Pennsylvania Democratic if the people
would only vote tbat way. Two ice water
pitchers on the floor, that had been filled to the
brim, were as dry as the desert of Sahara.
Finally both mathematicians leaned back,
looked at each other, and sighed.
'Pretty tough," remarked Bigler, with a
painful smile.
"Rather," replied the Chairman. '1 had a
tussle with It last year, you know."
An Indolent breeze stole in through the cur
tains, swept across both faces and gave the
workers a little hope. In another minute they
had begun figuring again; in two more they had
stopped.
"Maybe Wallace could figure this out," aid
Bigler, finally, "be isn't a slouch at figures."
"Afraid not," answered Kisner, sadly. "Be
sides, he isn't here."
"Let's send for Coxe, then. He went all
Freiberg and Paris, and translated Wiseback's
Mechanics when he was only 18. A fellow who
could do that ought to be able to work ont
this."
Tbe Chairman made no reply. He was think
ing doubtless of Mr. Coxe's previous efforts in
this direction.
"You see, Bigler," he finally said, "it isn't
figuring we want."
"NoT" echoed the candidate, inquiringly.
"What then!" '
"Votes" was the laconic reply.
Stone Throwers In Glass Honse.
From the Toledo Blade.
A caref nl collation of examples shows that
the men who have been sneering at President
Harrison because he bad an honorable and
honored grandfather, are generally persons
whose own grandfathers had no record of
wnich their descendants can be prond, or else
don't know who their own grandfathers were.
Profitable Target Practice.
From the Chicago Inter Orean.l
The young Idea has begun to shoot in district
schools all over the country. This Is the kind
of target practice that rings the bell of future
TRI-STATE TRIFLES.
Sqwibbels are migrating northeast in great
numbers. They are often seen swimming Chau
tauqua, lake. Such migration has not been
noted for many years, and weather prophets
claim it to be an indication of an early and se
vere winter.
The Chief of the Beaver Falls Fire Depart
ment and several others went out bunting and
captured an old coon and four young ones.
which tney Drougnc nome aure.
The following subscription paper, evidently
written by some wag, was in circulation on the
streets of Bradford In the hands of a half-witted,
illiterate and dead broke musician, and
strange to say, it captured many a nickel: "My
name is George Washington: I have lost my
voice: my nddle is pawned: I bave two wives
and a dog dependent upon me for supper."
A gravity engine, to be operated on the
Mount Penn Road, is blockading one of Bead
ing's main streets, and 43 horses are nnaole to
dislodge it.
A wouax boarded a Philadelphia street car
With seven cbildren, and so ingeniously ar
ranged them on each other's laps that three
car fares settled her bill with the Traction
Company. "Are they all yours?'' asked an ad
miring passenger. "Be gol, they be, and a pair
of twins home in the basket."
A WnKKLnro merchant bought a tub of but
ter, in tbe middle of which he found a small,
skim milk cheese. Concealed in the cheese
was a stone to make It weigh heavier.
TnKEE girls in East Liverpool agreed to let
each other read the last love letters they had
received. Great was the excitement when it
was discovered that, ail were written by the
same'youngman." - --
cbikm mmtiimm
A stone mansion bHt in I860 em a Jtm
near Greenbusb, X. Y., sttt stead.
Aaiong tbe aaryeis AJSocntf iU.
farm is a taHaower stoek ea wkMi an ever 89
sunflowers.
A Warren county, iCy., oeseie are
celebrating their golden wedatotr by maiZ
In a suit for divorce. 5
There is an, entire township ia Bbm
cornrtr, Kaa., in which there M feet s ettaM
family left, onttide of the prairie deg Mies.
The Eussian Minister of" "War has or
dered that military races shall be indulged is
frost time to time is a means of iaptorixctM
cavalry.
AWaverlv, Mick, man taw ha wife'
foot sticking up above tee lower eadoliie
bed, aad thinking it was a burglar lie seat at t4
His wife now limps.
A lawyer, wtik arjrainjt a oww,ki s
Louisville court, was attacked wkh rhosmi
ttem of the heartland calling out "WbaC aw
AfleadrfeilUfeleMtotaeflJor. " "!"!
JohVCardwjller, an Iowa weHdisgerJ
claims to have found at the bottom of oa of
J"1' oMgrings a pieee of reek on wales "the
e rs ana stripes are drttteorHr feraed. 4
wij -utiuauanr, in .t tsfctsau, urc, jtaa -
gone Into the business of rateteg MonaeHaa "
p?ffa2t8 He has a score or two that were
&&. ?y ola M8 toes. Tfcey are all
dolne; flatly. "
Miss Cora E. Slone, of Palmyra, 3T. Y.,
who has Jast graduated from Mt HMyeke, has
f5Sil2?osltlon teacher in a tbhz todies'
hfme1o1tofeaad leaT9 "
Probably the longest word Ia tae0ep-,
man language U in the last edUaaeT,aV
A resident of Eaten coaaty, Miai., 88
years old, asked the clerk of Jaekses ooaaty
!2r.8"ileni?ti.wea,Toledo san years of
age The clerk found some reasonable excuse
lor refusing the license.
The oldest Morse telegrapher In the
world h J. D. Beid, the statistician of the West
ern Union 1 Company at Kew York- Mr.Reldls
71 years Of age. a Scotchman by birth, and is as
cheerful and vigorous as a man of 35.
E. O. Brufiy, a reporter oa the staffof
the Atlanta CenHUutfm, has been seat to jail
for IS days by Judge Clarke f or deeHatee to tell
the grand jury whether or root Be saw a certain
policeman in the party wHIeh brutally whipped
some colored men at Bast Pe4at oae nJgat last
week; -
Matthew "Walton, of" "Wya4et eeaaty.
O., recently dog up the reAatas of a iwsfo?
supposed to be tho same tbat ee Wii'
lngtori presented to Cokmel Craw law. aha ot.
tne neroes OI ten Indian xnu-.
k imiMH
near tne spot where Crawford waaaniaaas
the stake 107 years ago. r j
On last Tuesday Mr. J. S. Hadw,. of
Camilla, arrived at Bronwodd, G& 04 a vfct
to his sister. Mrs. B. F. Evans. Oa TtaredaV
Miss Bosa Sharpe, of Albany, arrived eBa
visit to the same family, and oa Friday aigat
tbe two visitors were quietly united 14 mar
riage at the parsonage. Rev. KF.Brasu of
ficiating; The youths of Belfast, Me., are iayiag
great sport in dipping tbe Jmali herring that
swarm tbe cove. A long combustible teres la
extended some six oj eight feet over. the bow of
the boar, and wbea all is ready the torch la
lighted and the word ifl giten to "paH bard,
boys," and in a few minutes the water is aHvo
with the flsb. "
-"While some laborers were esgagedia
chopping timber in abfe wooda nearDeeatar,
Iflct, tbey accidentally discovered what is sap--posed
to hire been a counterfeiters' rendez
vous. Beneath the earth surface was found a
brick fdrnlce, several half dollars dated 1MB
and some bf tbe metal from whieh the sparic-tfs
coins, were made.
Among the smart old people in Belter,
Ms., are Mr. Phoebe Moore Campbell, who
will celebrate ier lst birthday October 13
next, and Mr, Charles Boncoe. 140 years old last
March. ..Both enjoy good health, aad Mrs.
Campbell had a handsome quilt, flnlshed sines
Iter lOOth birthday,.on exhibition at the Eastes.
Me., fair this year.
The first hearse owned is Brtiniwick,
Me., has been stored for many years in the barn
at the town almshouse- It Is a sort of a two
storied affair, and last week it was parebaied?
ur wo utQfuittfixiriHrmnna n wnci om oa:
vas, phi jbio ie a small aoocin? I both and Nu
blankets, harnessed np tkeir oW aorta aad
juonaay startea on a tour to Canada.
Colonel Dyer, of BL Louis, white on
his way to Washington left his shoes la the
sleeper, and when the transfer was made at Bal
timore the Colpnel forgot be was Wearing only
a pair of slippers. The shoes went on to New
York and Colonel Dyer to Washington. He at
traded considerable attention as he came walk
Ing down Pennsylvania avenue in a pair of
blazing red slippers,
dd one of the highest mountains in
North Georgia, about ten miles northeast of
Jasper, lives' Mr. Lit Haynes. Nineteen years
ago hebdnght380 acres of land on this mountain
for a trifle. He cleared and put in cultivation
lOOacres. It was rough, rocky and a very unin
viting spot, and one would have thought Mr.'
Haynes was fixing to starve' to death, but such
has not been tbe case. He Is now a prosperous
farmer, raising 1,600 to 3,060 bushels of grain a
year, and a great quantity of other crops.
By a series of strange coincidences eight
young people living in Hatfield township, near
Lansdale, Pa became engaged to each other at
the same time, fixed upon tbe same date for
their marriage, and were married by tbe same
minister at the same place and hour on Satur
day last. Up to the hour of tbe ceremony each
of the four couples had been totally unaware,
of the intention of the others, as to when,
where and Dy whom they should be married,
although the fact of their engagement was
known.
A POT-POURRI OF PLEA3A3TKT.
The cry'of the bittern ''Call off yonr
blank Hog." Botton Merald.
"What pleased her most A glass of. beer
and a rd flag. Boston llirald.
""What a bold-faced thing that Misit
Fhlnrtlst"
3 should say 10! Wby, the actually spoke to at
perfect stranger on the beach to-day. Just as I
had got hint to notice me."--Tint.
IN EXTBBMIS.
A fly lay bleeding and wet with gore,
Crashed on the bald man's head,
Bnt In dying be sprang this ghastly Joke.
"I'm mashed on you." he said. Lift.
Unlimited Capacity. "Wife (reiding
aloud to-her husband) fie stood In the center of
tbe room, drinking In everything before him, as
if unable to satisfy a voracious appetite for
Husband I'll bet he was from KentaekT.
Time.
A- Logical Conclusion. Johny "What
dots father mean when he talks abont .belonging
to the Bod and Unn Club.
Mother A rod, I suppose, my boy, is the dis
tance at which tbey lire their guns when shooting;
atamafk. Boston Herald.
Tommy Are we going to take the cat
with ns when we go to tee grandma next wgekf
Mrs. IlzgOt coarse not. What makes yon ask
such foolish questions .
Tommy 'Cause I heard pa ten Mr. Bragjrs tfiat
the mice wonld have a nlgn old time while the cat "
was away next week, that's all. Tart Uaule Ex
yttti.
The correspondent who wants to know
"how to cook cabbage without having an odor In
the house" Is Informed, in the absence of the ex
pert who conducts our household department,
that a good way Is to boll tbe cabbage in tbe mid
dle of a ten-acre lot and keep the doors aad win
dows 01 tne nonse ngntiy closed while it Is cook
ing. Somstmm Herald.
"Can't I stay home from chnrchwith
you, pa. Just to-day?" pleaded small sinner
Bobby.
Mo. Bobert, jou must go with your mother."
Then be added to bis wife, as he slapped his
mornlni naner Into oosltlon. "I Deneva in m .
mother's old adage: Train np a child In the wayA'
h. ilTnnlil .n nf1 vhni I10 1 nlA h.wtli..)... . .J
..w ....v..... ., ...... .. ...... v w v... ... n-M UVfjUC-1. ,
part from it.' "it. A;
A Few Eecent Titles Explained. 'IA.'
False Start." Going to the mountains fn Octo
ber,
The Home Life or Great Anthors." Haab,-'
three times a day.
"Monarcbs I Have Met." Four kings in the
Other man's hand.
"April Hopes. ''-That the rent will be reduced .
in May: bnt it won't. Life.
Jack "iTou look thoughtful, John. Any
thing on yonr mind?
John Ob, no; Iwaj only thinking or the dayl
bade my sweetheart good-by, and of my receptloa
when 1 returned to her.
"Of coarse sbe was glad to tee you?"
She teemed to be."
"And yon held her In your arms and covered
her face with kisses?"
"I undoubtedly would have done so bat fcr oaa
oostacie.'T
"What wastaaU!
Her hatband." Tins
i
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