?:
THE1- PITTSBURG 'DISPATCH, MONDAY, ' SEPTEMBER"
ie;-
18897
It
Mje Mimm.
ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY S, 1846.
YoL, Jf o.2I. Entered at 1'lttsburg l'ostomce.
'o ember 14, 1SS7, as sccona-class matter.
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average for each workingman in the United
States, -with the actual pittance of $700
to $800 per year, it is impossible to resist
the conclusion that some one must be get
ting rich very fast
The Senator is too modest in his deduc
tion. "When there is an increase of wealth of
$7,500 per hour for every worker in the
country and the average worker has to
hustle to earn twenty cents, the conclusion
that the old soldiers should be pensioned is
entirely weak and impotent Everybody
should be pensioned. A pension of $50,
000,000 per year for each veteran would give
them no more than the average, and one of
say $10,000,000 for each ordinary citizen
would leave a vast surplus. "We hope to
see the Senator introduce a bill to rectify
this vast inequality upon the assembling of
Congress. All this wealth should not go
undisposed of.
PITTSBURG. MO.SDAY, SEP. 10, 1889.
USING MODERN IDEAS.
The march of modern ideas has never had
a more marked illustration than the adop
tion at Br. Spronll's church, in Allegheny,
yesterday, of a telephone device whereby
deaf persons in their pews, who could not
ordinarily hear the clergyman's discourse,
were enabled, by putting the receivers to
their ears, to absorb the whole homily.
The subject of the sermon, appropriately
enough, was the duty of the church-in adapt
ing itself to the needs and character of the
age. "While the orthodox precepts were val
uable, they are not likely to strike the
public mind with half the force that attaches
to the practice of summoning the latest tri
umphs of invention to the work of bringing
home the teachings of tbe churches to their
hearers.
Some elements in our churches have been
indisposed to keep up with the age. The
indication that one church at least is going
to use the newest methods in spreading the
old and yet ever new doctrines is full of
promise lor its usefulness.
A POLITICAL DECLABATI0N.
Tbe announcement of the Single Tax As
sociation, of Pittsburg, that it will support
the Democratic party as "moving more
closely to the line of individual freedom
and emancipation of labor than any other,"
has its peculiar features. In view of the
lact that no party in Pennsylvania has been
able to adopt the single tax idea, the deci
sion of its supporters to act on the broad
and catholic platform of backing the party
which they think represents individual free
dom and emancipation of labor is certainly
commendable, xneir principle oi selection
may be rather obscure, and their estimate of
the importance of tbe votes of their hundred
members seems unique. Nevertheless, their
determination to do all they can for indi
vidual freedom as represented by Air. Bigler
as State Treasurer, whether he collects a
single tax or not is refreshing in its good
faith.
HOW NOT TO BO IT.
The unique features of Kew Tort's
World's Fair movement continue to be
principally characterized by an overwhelm
ing desire not to put up the cash for it The
latest plan published was based on the neat
little arrangement of having the land on
which the Fair is to be located bought for
$3,000,000, and after the show is over of hav-ing-it
sold lor $9,000,000. This simple oper
ation, it is Quite plain, would let the Expo
sition out even.
Pending the adoption of this or some other
scheme, the Herald calls upon the public to
"give the committee time to formulate a
plan." The committee being composed of
the principal millionaires, who should put
up the largest share of the funds, the time
required to adopt the simple plan of writing
down their subscriptions should not be very
great As that is what no one in New York
seems ready to do except the lively editor
of the New York Sun a plan by which the
New York millionaires can escape the pub
lic duty of paying anything is likely to take
a good deal oi time in its architecture.
New York's inability to do anything the
right way seems to have got in its most fatal
work last week. Just when it should be
raising the wind for an Exposition it suc
ceeded in raising the wind for an ocean
storm.
' ' RICHES TJrTDREAKED OF.
A new and stunning idea of the increase
of national wealth is afforded by a recently
published speech of Senator Ingalls. That
statesman is reported as having declared to
his auditors that "the national wealth in-creases-at
the rate of $42,000,000 for every
tick or his watch." This assertion of the
increase of our wealth at $12,000,000 per
second, the Senator conceives to be full
justification for amoreliberal pension policy
than has yet been dreamed oi.
The ability of the nation to support a
liberal pension policy is conceded; but the
magnitude of the Senator's abilities in deal
ing with figures deserves some attention. It
is to be remembered that he is reported as
speaking of the "increase" of national
wealth, not of the total production. If a
man produces a thousand dollars worth of
grain, and eats it up or wears out the staples
for which he barters it tbe national wealth
does not increase at all. It is evident that
the learned Senator therefore alleges a pro
duction far in excess of the increase of na
tional wealth; and as expense of production
is necessarily the greater half of it, we do
not see how the statement of aggregated
national production on his figures can fall
below $100,000,000 per second.
Xet us see where this leads us. There
ere 60 seconds in a minute, CO
minutes in an hour and 24 hours
in a day. According to the Senator's
figures, therefore, the daily increase of the
national wealth is represented by the neat
little sum of $352,8SO,OOO,O00; and we
shrink from the task of burdening the col
umns of The Dispatch with the figures
necessary to show the increase of our
wealth for a single year. It is plain that
this statement of facts should warrant a
decided change in our national policy. "We
should pay oil the national debt in the first
quarter of an hour, and then devote a slight
share of our surplus wealth in buying up
the rest of the world and stopping wars and
tyranny forever.
Another remarkable disclosure. There are
.about 20,000,000 men in this conn try engaged
in the workof production. Theaverage share
of each individual in the increase of wealth,
according to Senator Ingalls' statistics,
therelore, should be $2 10 per second, $126
per minute, $7,560 per hour, $181,440 per
day; and the remarkable total of over $54,
000,000 per year. "When we compare this
FUTILE FOOLISHNESS.
That Minnesota law by which the attempt
was made to prevent inter-State traffic in
dressed beef, has reached a decision in the
United States Circuit Court at Chicago.
Like every State judge who has passed
upon that stupidly absurd enactment,
Judge Blodgett had no hesitation in declar
ing it unconstitutional. There seems to be
no disposition to take the matter to the
United States Supreme Court, and this may
be regarded as the end of the law.
The history of this piece of legislation
furnishes, first, a remarkable commentary
on the class of legislators who pass a law
that every intelligent man knows to be un
constitutional; and next an illustration of
the foolishness which strives to destroy ob
noxious features of a legitimate business by
destroying the business altogether. At the
same time that this decision is rendered, in
vestigation is proving that the dressed beef
magnates have their hold upon that interest
by virtue of railroad favors similar to those
which built up the Standard Oil Company.
If the producers of Pennsylvania had tried
to pass laws preventing the sale of refined
petroleum, it would have been in the same
line of action that was adopted by the anti
dresscd beef people.
It should not take much thought to per
ceive that the remedy for such things is to
establish conditions of transportation as will
make it impossible for anyone to secure -exclusive
privileges. If that were done, every
one would be at liberty to buy cattle either
for dressed beef or shipment on the hoof.
The competition of buyers would give cattle
raisers the best prices possible under normal
conditions of demand and supply, and the
economies of the dressed beef trade would
give consumers lower-priced meat
To abandon that policy for the effort to
kill the dressed beef trade by the passage or
an unconstitutional law, is to surpass the
teat of the man who burned his house down
in order to get rid of the mosquitoes ia it
York the special organ of the railway inter
ests or the country. That may increase the
value of the journal inquestionas an organ.
It has not for some time had any value as a
newspaper.
The Chief of the Chicago fire department
recently read a paper at a public meeting
criticising the use of unlined, knit and
woven hose. The spread of the dress reform
movement is encouraging.
TnE funeral of Captain James Bees, yes
terday afternoon, appropriately observed the
end of a life that had been long and
creditably identified with Pittsburg com
merce and industries. One by one the old
leaders of our city's activities are passing
away.
Chikese boycotts may be a little more
incomprehensible than the ordinary kind;
but both are equally opposed to the princi
ple of individual liberty.
THE CRITIC.
Perhaps the reason why the New York
millionaires do not put up their money for
the "World's Fair is their dissatisfaction at
not getting what they regard as their due
share of Senator Ingalls' $42,000,000 per
second increase of the national wealth.
PEOrLE OF PROMINENCE.
C0EP0SATI0N CANDIDATES.
"With regard to the reported refusal of Mr.
Chauncev M. Depew to resign his railroad
position in order to advance nis political
ambitions, the Philadelphia Press says:
It is true that unscrupulous men have made
nse of railroad corporations to rob the people
by stock-watering and other such schemes. But
there are men of this kind engaged in every
line of business. It furnishes no reason for the
wholesale denunciation of the officers of cor
porations, and Mr. Depew has shown his
sterling qualities by refusing to pander to this
prejudice.
It is true that there is a decided difference
between railroad men; but that fact does
not touch the rim of the issue as to
corporation men in politics. There are dis
creditable and dishonest men in every line
of business, as the Press asserts. But when
such a line of business is united in demand
ing from the legislative powers, that it shall
be exempted from the penalties of dis
honesty and recklessness, by emancipation
from the competition which regulates the
profits and business of the masses, it would
be very just to object to a representative of
that class, however creditable in his private
character, as a Presidental candidate or a
Senator.
The idea that Mr. Depew can divest him
self of his education and environment as a
railroad man by resigning his batch of rail
road presidencies is, of course, absurd.
One illustration suffices to show the way in
which all his interests regard public
questions where the corporations are con
cerned. "When the Inter-State Commerce
law was pending and just before its pass
age, Mnj.Depew asserted that if enacted it
would depreciate the value of "Western land
fifty per cent Within a year lrom that
timeiie found it necessary to explain an in
terview in which he criticised the remarka
ble advance of "Western land. It Mr.
Depew had been President when the Inter
State Commerce law was passed, would the
public interests in that enactment have had
much weight?
When the issues arising out of the rela
tions of the railroads to the pnblic are
settled in a way that will keep the corpora
tions themselves out of politics, the bright
and able men who manage them will be
welcome in politics in their personal char
acter. Until then, it is necessary to re
member that the interests of the people are
paramount to those of the corporations, and
that the man has not yet been discovered
who can represent the latter and do justice
to the former.
Oliver Wendell Holmes recently re
marked that death bears as pleasing a face to
an old man as sleep to one who is tired.
Kiko Alpiioxso, the baby potentate of
Spain, has offered a prize to tbe citizens of
Madrid who will invent the cleverest and mosU
novel toy.
Having suffered two severe chills since his
arrival In Washington, ten days ago, Senator
Voorhees, of Indiana, is confined to bis home
at the capital, but his friends expect that he
will soon be able to go outdoors again.
The Doe and Duchess of Bedford are
"rusticating" at the present moment in their
500,000 cottage at Endsleigb, Devonshire.
The "cottage" is surrounded by grounds which
contain no less than CO miles of grass rides and
gravel walks.
Teat Queen Victoria is a woman of more
than ordinary force of character is clearly
shown by the fact that daring her recent visit
to Wales she on several occasions nattered the
natives by addressing them in their own lan
guage. Moreover, she is able to both read and
wnte Hindostanee with considerable fluency.
There are but few ladies who at the age of TO
would have the perseverance and the,courago
to acquire proficiency in two such excruciat
ingly difficult languages as Hindostanee and
Welsh.
Nathaniel E. Howard, a retired capital
ist of San Francisco, was an original ''Forty
niner." He says: "I was in Frisco when there
were 45000 men and not a single family. Judge
Terry, who was shot down while attacking Jus
tice Field, made a lot of trouble in those days,
and 1 was a member of the Vigilance Com
mittee that kept him seven weeks in its rooms
while awaiting the Tesult of the shot wounds
Terry gave Hopkins. Had Hopkins died and
he was mighty close to death Terry would
have been lynched. He richly deserved it"
OF all tbe sovereigns of Europe the Czar of
Russia is the least pleased with his work. This
is not owing to the fact that tbe Czar has Nihil
ism to fight, but because he is constitutionally
opposed to the cares of State. He likes to
hunt and fish, and is very fond of his family.
He ia sociable by nature and enjoys sitting at a
table drinking wine and talking to good friends.
It is seldom, however, that he can indulge his
tastes in any of these directions. He is obliged
to give a great deal of time to the affairs of his
vast empire, and he often wishes that he had
been bom in an humble station.
Singular and SubbcsiIvo Interest In the
Twentieth Century Looking Backward
In Review Bellamy's Ideas Tanched
Up The Spirit of Dm Ilolmes an Ele
ment of Next Ceniary Lost Leaden.
We ought to be able to recognize the twen
tieth century when it comes at last upon the
scene. If wo fail it will be either because we
have ourselves departed where centuries cease
from troubling, or else because there has been
something wrong about tbe descriptions of it.
At any rate there has been no lack of descrip
tion. The new century has already nad its
picture taken by a good many enthusiastic and
amateur photographers. We know precisely
how it will look; or ought to look. And as for
writing, the most ambitious century could
hardly desire to be written up at greater
length or with more abundant generosity of
adjectives. The twentieth century has had
plenty of "advance notices." Indeed, one is
reminded of what Max O'Rell thought was one
of the queerest incidents of hi? recent visit to
"Jonathan and His Continent" when he was
met as he embarked at Liverpool, by a note
from the editor of "The Critic," asking for two
columns of his "preconceived notions" of
America.
It is rather remarkable, when you come to
think of It. Though, for that matter, every
thing in this world becomes remarkable and
notable when anybody does any genuine think
ing about it, it Is not a little singular and sug
gestive, this popular interest in the twentieth
century. Whatever else it means it shows this:
that there is a widespread consciousness of two
significant elements in the century in which
we live to-day. There is an element of wonder,
and there is an element of wrong in the exist
ing conditions. We are all looking ahead to
see the wonders emphasized and multiplied,
and to see the wrongs righted. The two most
interesting personages in our modern life are
tbe scientists and the socialists. We expect a
a great deal from each of these companies of
progress. And this expectation makes us look
ahead into the darkness into which tbe world
is in a few years to take a leap, and to wish
that some flash light could make it visible.
Some of the most decided aid that is giv
en to Field Marshal Halstead's political
aspirations is furnished unwittingly by the
people who are trying to serve out the
Standard Oil Company's spite under cover
of the name of John A. Logan.
The report that the reclaiming of the
Everglades of Florida will give the nation
a sugar producing district that will smash
the Sugar Trust, is pleasant reading. But
what is the security that the eminent capi
talists, with Hon.W. JJ. Scott at their head,
who are draining that section, will not,
when they get their lands in operation,com
bine with the Sugar Trust and squeeze some
additional millions out of the long-suffering
people.
Cotjld there be any more striking evi
dence of the pettiness of what is called
statesmanship in Europe than Bismarck's
desire to have Louis Kossuth driven, in old
age, out the home which he has occupied in
Italy for years past?
The adoption of the Australian system of
voting in Minnesota is reported to work
very satisfactorily. But that Is no evidence
that it would meet requirements in New
York and Pennsylvania. The object 'of
holding elections in New York, Philadel
phia and Pittsburg are understood to be
.entirely distinct from those which prevail in
Minnesota.
THEEE is much more hope of the satis
factory arbitration of Mr. McKnight's
claim for work at Johnstown than there
seems to be for that neat sum claimed by
the Pittsburg Belief Committee.
ENGAGED, WEDDED, YID0V7ED.
An Eventful Hoar In tbo Life of a ProvU
dence Housekeeper.
Pkoyidenck. September 15. The death-bed
marriage of John Lawton, Past National Su
preme Hanger of the Foresters, has Invested
the closing scene of bis life with a touch of
romance. Law ton was a man of considerable
means and had a big and generous heart.
Touched with the devotion of Clara Louise
Elinora Fogg, his housekeeper, he offered her
his hand and heart as he lay dying, with but an
hour of life to live. The person to whom he
offered to devote the remainder of his exist
ence (about 69 minutes) did not ask for delay
nor toy with tho offer. She was no coy maiden,
but a matron of 35, who bad passed through a
Eeriod of miserable matrimony years ago. She
ad nursed him tilth tender solicitude and
with unselfish devotion, and had refused to
be relieved of duties trying enough to prostrate
the most robust woman. He appeared to be so
desirous of being accurately informed as to his
condition that be created an impression that if
there had been any hope of recovery he would
have reserved his hand for some other woman,
to whom rumor sajs he was engaged in New
York. But the medical men were positive
nothing could save him. His housekeeper had
gone into the bedchamber with a tray contain
ing delicacies when Mr. Lawton beckoned her
to bis side.
"I want you to do me a favor," he Bald. "I
want you to marry me. I have but a few hours
to live, and I want to make you some return for
all your goodness and attention. Will you have
me?"
Half an hour later the Rev. Mr. Plummer
read the marriage service at the sido of that
deathbed and Mrs. Fogg became Sirs. Lawton.
In less than another half hour she was Widow
Lawton and her husband was being prepared
lor the grave.
Mr. Lawton's estate, which goes to the widow,
is valued at 30,000, but his relatives will try to
get it on the ground that Mrs. Fogg, having a
husband living, was not legally free to marry.
THE FEATURE OP THE SHOW.
A,CoupIe Wedded on tbe Grand Stand at a
Connty Fair.
Middletowx, N. Y., September 15. As an
nounced in advance, the marriage ceremony
solemnized on the grand stand at the annual
fair of tbe Delaware Valley Agricultural So
ciety, held at Walton the past week, was the
attraction of the show. The couple who filled
the role of brido and groom on the occasion
were Miss Ella Hotchkiss and Mr. John Bristol,
good-looking and respectable young folks of
Walton. At 2 P. M. on Wednesday the enam
ored pair, attended by bridemaid and best
man, were driven to tbo fair gronnds in an
open barouche, drawn by four gayly capari
soned horses, and escorted by the officers of the
Agricultural Society and by the Walton firo
department, of which organization the groom
is a member, all to the music of the Walton
Band. The nuptial ceremony was formally
celebrated on the trraud stand bv the Rev. O.
D. Ramsey, pastor of the Walton Methodist
Church, in the presence of 5,000 interested
spectators, who cheered the pretty young bride
enthusiastically.
Tbe display of wedding gifts to the pair by
the officers of tbe agricultural society and by
other friends formed a largo and somewhat in
congruous selection of housekeeping gooas.
Tbe list included parlor and bedroom furni
ture, chlnaware, a range, a family Bible, a baby
carriage, a doll wagon, a pair of game chickens
and a Scotch collie pnp. Tbe Ontario and
AVestern Railroad Company supplemented the
other girts by free tickets to New York and re
turn on the wedding journey.
WEDDED WHILE THE STORM EAGED.
Me. C. P. Huntington is reported to
have adopted the determination that he will
make the newspaper which he owns in New
A aiarringe Under TJnnsnal Circumstances
at Allnntlc City.
Atlantic City, Sept 15. While tho winds
and waves were battling fiercest on Tuesday
along the shoro a rather remarkable wedding
took place here. The ceremony was performed
by Mayor Hoffman, and the groom was John
J. Kersey, a wealthy Gentleman residing at
nincieenmami urcen streets, xiie uriue was
Miss May H. Kirbv. tbe sister of the proprietor
of the Margate Hotel, where the sister has
always acted as housekeeper for the brother.
Mr. Kersey has been spending tbe greater part
of the summer at tho Margate, and it was there
that he met and wooed his bride.
Tbe couple were to have taken the 4 o'clock
tram for Philadelphia on their way to Balti
more for their wedding trip, but at that time
the train service was cut off, and they were
compelled to spend tbeir honeymoon at the
wave-swept shore. When telegraph service
was re-established between Atlantic City and
the rest of the world, Mr. Kersey received
news of tbe death of a near relative. Mrs. Mary
Jacob Jones, of Bridgeport, Montgomery
county. The wedding trip has been postponed
Indefinitely.
A Bogus Shooting Story.
From the Chicago Tribune.!
Esteemed Southern exchanges sbonld not
believe all the stories that are printed about the
'carnival of crime" in tbe North. The late
reports concerning the unprovoked shooting
of Niagara Falls are generally, discredited by
the best informed Northern papers.
If there were no science and no socialism,
Mr. Edward Bellamy would never have writ
ten Looking Backward. And so a great mul
titude of people would have missed reading a
good book. I bought a new copy a day or two
ago some absent-minded borrower having
made way with my old one and it was in
scribed on the title page as being one of the
ninety-first thousand. It has not equalled,
even yet, the 300,000 of "Mr. Barnes, of New
York;" but after the sense of literary discour
agement which falls upon one at the sight of
such a large number on such a bundle of
bound trash, it is some comfort to find a worthy
book selling at such a rate.
"Looking Backward" is being translated.
The Nationalist tells ns. Into German. And
the prediction is hazarded that Bismarck will
read it with a sensation of strong disgust.
Somebody else is putting it into French, and
"quite a stir" is anticipated in onr sister re
public. "Looking Backward" is, at least, mak
ing quite a stir here. And this evidences itself
in other ways than the testimony of the book
sellers' ledgers. Tlie Nationalist itself is a
significant mark of the impression of the book.
The Nationalist is the organ of tbe Na
tionalist clubs. In Boston, in New York, in
Hartford, in Chicago, in California, in Minne
sota, in Texas, are associations of men and
women reporting to this paper, meeting for
discussion of the best way to make the
twentieth century and the millennium come in
together, and working alone the Hues sug
gested by "Looking Backward."
Mr. Bellamy tells us in the opening article of
the first number, "How 1 came to write 'Look
ing Backward.' " It is always interesting to
know how people come to do things, and es
pecially when the things were worth doing.
Mr. Bellamy had no idea of writing a serious
book when he began, he says. He had simply
set about composing "a mere literary fantasy,
a fairytale of social felicity." In tbe great out-of-doors
of the future, with all the room he
wanted and no facts to bother and obstruct
him, he was proceeding to make tbe whole
world over. The date was the year 3000, and
the center of the universe was Ashevllle, N. C.
Somehow it happened in the construction of
the plot by one of those intellectual surprises
which begin by surprising the author, and for
which a good name is inspiration somehow
Mr. Bellamy hit upon the word "army." And
that revolutionized his whole idea. More and
mgre, as he worked that out tho idea seemed
more practicable and more near. At last he
changed the date and narrowed the scene to
the United States, and wrote his book.
That if you think over the splendid vision of
"Looking Backward," is the word at the cen
ter. An industrial army, with an army's com
bination ot aristocracyand democracy, with an
army's union of effort and purpose, with the
elimination of tbe idea of shame or deerada
tlon about the doing of menial duty when one
is assigned to it, with tho possibilities in tbe
way of every man for making the most of him
self, and yet always in subordination to tbe aim
and purpose of the army and for the rood of
the whole this is the solution which "Looking
Backward" offers to the problem of industrial
discontent
The twentieth century will be a fine time to
live in, if it is at all like Mr. Bellamj's picture
of it. In the first place wo will all have money
enough to live on comfortably; and "com
fortably" means not only bread and butter, but
books and pictures. And as for the spending
of money, shopping in the millennium will be
even more interesting than it is now. There
will be a Wanamaker's in every ward. And
the clerks, we are told, though this is almost
too good to be true, will not tell us what we
ought to buy. The clerks will all be Govern
ment officials, and will be no more interested
in tho amount of our purchase than tho man is
at the stamp window.
And we will have a May Festival every honr
of every day, if we want it, by onr telephonic
connection with the central concert room of
our ward, where tbe city has the best talent,
by relays, every hour of the 24. Tbe boy will
bring us the daily programme when he brings
the morning paper. When we are wakeful at
night we can have the softest harmonies to
persuade us off to sleep again. And when we
want to get up for an early train we can have
an anvil chorus, or a brass band playing "Hail
Columbia!" right in our ear, at 520 in the
morning.
As for the great maid servant problem, that
will bo solved by elaborate ward kitchens,
where we send our orders and get our dinners
piping hot or else by family rooms inelegant
ward restaurants.
And when "The Century Dictionary" is re
vised to fit the twentlenth century there will
be no such phrase in it as "ward politician,"
and no such word as "menial;" "ennui" will be
obsolete, and "brotherhood" will bo printed in
illuminated capitals.
Hughes means In this month's Forum by bis ar
ticle on Mr. Gladstone; he speaks in the news
paper sense.
The "Lost Leaders" lead ono Jn all sorts of
delightful directions. And a great part ot
their charm is that they don't insist on taking
you such a long tramp that you are tired out
before you have gone half way. They are all
short, and they are upon all manner of topics.
"Scotch Rivers," "Thacneray's Drawings,"
'The Art of Dining," "On Shaving." "The
Lending of Books," "Club Bores," "The Theo
ry and Practice of Proposals," "Some Rare
Things for Sale" these are some titles from
the table of contents. Indeed, we have here a
two hours' talk in the most friendly and famil
iar fashion with a man most delightful to listen
to, in which, as in most of the best talking, the
conversation turns easily "from politics to
puns" and passes "from Mahomet to Moses."
"Lost Leaders" is the utterance of a man of
letters. Mr. Long's studies among books and
myths show through in every paragraph. An
other book of' brief and varied sketches, in
which the writer converses charmingly with
the reader, fs Miss Baylor's -A. Shocking
Example. Only here we have the prlvileee of
the society of a bright, clear-eyed woman.
Miss Baylor's "Behind the Blue Ridge," while
very likely quite true to nature, was a most
depressing book. I see that the publishers
have bound it in bine. But "On Both Sides" -I
was inspiring and cheerful enough to wake up.
And in "A Shocking Example" it is the writer
of that charming international study who talks
to us. Tbo name-piece doesn't amount to
much; it is a sketch of the goings-on at a very
mixed and miscellaneous "Union" Sunday
School in California. In fact none of the
sketches "amount" to much, from the point of
view of some people. The Cambridge wrangler
who was disgusted. with "Paradise Lost" be
cause it didn't prove anything, would very
likely have some fault to find. "Craddbck's
Heldesf'is a significant study of life in the
loner levels of London society. "Hidalgo, the
Washington of Mcxfco," Is a serious and strong
piece of historical writing. But, for the most
part, the (ketches are simply bright and enter
taining. And, according to the wise saying,
for the people who like that sort of thing this
is just the sort of thing they will like. There
are a good many bright people who like "this
sort of thing" greatly. For others, there are
the metaphysics and the algebras.
WHY THE MAILS KDSfl.
Delays That Cost the Railroad Companies
Larue Sums Stops Paid far at the Rate
of 835 an Honr Tbo Par for Service
on Fast Trains.
Delayed mail trains cost the Pennsylvania
Railroad $150,000 a year.
"The letter carrier may flirt with his servant
girl friends or kill time as he tramps bis daily
rounds with tbe mail pouch," said an official to a
Philadelphia JRecord reporter, "but the railroad
companies that hurry Uncle Sam's letter bags
at lightning speed from ocean to ocean and
lake to gulf, mult run their trains sharp to
schedule time or pay damages for delay.
"The public does not know it but tbe Penn
sylvania Railroad and every other line in the
country for practically all are to some extent
sorvants of the Postofflce Department pays a
fine for all its shortcomings in. the mall service.
Postal freight is, of course, charged to the
Government bat there have been years In
which the Postmaster has subtracted as much
as (200.000 from the Pennsylvania Railroad
Company's bill because the bags of letters have
been delivered at their destination late. They
are stern task-masters, those officials in the big
granite buildings at the Capital.
"Superintendent J. Lowrle Bell arranges all
railroad contracts for carrying the malls. The
transportation companies are paid according to
the average weight of the mail they carry and
the distance It is conveyed. For example, the
mail that passes over the Pennsylvania Rail
road from Philadelphia to New York is weighed
some day during the year, and the amount
multiplied by tbe distance to New York gives
an aggregate by which compensation may be
adjusted. And in proportion to the payment
for service so are the fines for delay.
A GREAT BEWSPAPEB.
Brief Summary of tbe Interesting Csatents
of Yesterday's Dispatch.
The Dispatch of yesterday contained IS
pages, all filled with the freshest news and tbe
choicest original matter. Every class of read
ers, old, young; married and single, male and
female, find in tbe Sunday edition of this
paper a greater amonnt of choice literature
than can be procured in any other form for tbe
same price. The Dispatch makes no steps
bickward;,Its motto is "Progress,' and its aim
to give its readers a complete newspaper every
day.
A WONDERFUL WHIST HAND.
Each of tbo Players Accidentally Dealt a
Complete Salt.
Philadelphia, September 15. The corner
stone of the new building of the Hamilton
Club, soon to be erected on Forty-first street
near Locust, will contain one of the most re
markable packs of playing cards that the eye
of man has ever gazed upon. One week ago it
was merely an ordinary pack of red-backed
cards, hut a few evenings since it performed
such wonderful evolutions that it is now re
garded as little less than sacred. A quartet of
well-known West Philadelpblans, namely: Dr.
S. R. Skillero, Colonel Alexander W. Russell,
Joseph H. Cofrode and William S. Kimball,
were gathered in the cozy card room of the
present Hamilton Club, at Forty-first and Lo
cust street intent upon a game of "whist."
Prior to Dr. Skillern's arrival the other gen
tlemen bad been playing a three-banded game.
When be came in he took the pact, shuffled
and proceeded to deal. As the doctor examined
his hand he glanced up with a bewildered
twinkle In his eve, only to discern the same be
wilderment reflected on the faces of each of
his comrades.
"Fellows. 1 never had such a hand In all my
life, the doctor chuckled, after a moment's
pause. What do you think of it; Every card's
a diamond."
"Great heavens!" cried out Mr. Cofrode,
"why, mine are all clnbsl"
"And I I I hold 13 hearts," exclaimed
Colonel Russell, breathlessly rubbing his eyes'
and pinching his nose to mace sure that he
And then they all looked in Mr. Kimball's
direction. The whole suit ot spades lay spread
out before him, and be was bending over them
in complete mystification.
The cards were not bewitched, and there bad
been no trickery. When the astonished players
had somewhat regained their composure they
put their beads together and concluded that
the law of chance bad sanctioned a most pecu
liar freak. They called their friends in to view
the wonderful deal, then' picked up tbe cards
tenderly and signed an affidavit stating how
the band was dealt and denying the operation
of any external agent in the arrangement of
the cards. The pack is now on exhibition in
tbo clubrooms. where it is viewed by scores of
half-incredulous clubmen.
It is said that only two deals of like character
are on record as having been made in this
country, one in a Chicago clubhouse and the
other on a Massachusetts railroad tram, both
of them some years ago.
TWO PINE MONUMENTS.
Statues of Gen. McClcIlnn and Emma Ab
bott's Husband Both by Ellicott.
ISPECIAL TELEOIlAM TO TUB DISPATCH. 1
Wasdihgtos, September 15. Mr. Henry
J. Ellicott, chief of the model room of the
office of the Supervising Architect of the
Treasury, has just completed tbe final details
of a contract to construct tho equestrian
statue of General McClellan, which is to be
erected in tbe citv of Philadelphia, and is to
cost $30,000. Mr. Ellicott has also been en
gaged by Miss Emma Abbott, the prima donna,
to construct a monument to her late husband,
Mr. Wetherell. which Is to cost $80,000. Miss
Abbott is endeavoring to prevail upon the
friends of her husband to consent to the re
moval of his remains from the suburb of Bos
ton, where they are interred, to Greenwood
Cemetery, and if so the handsome monument
will be erected in that fashionable burying
ground.
Mr. Ellicott is a Philadelphia sculptor, and
under the terms of his engagement as chief of
the model room he may design and take charge
of outside work.
Ironclad Contracts.
"Agents of tbe Government record every
lateness in mail, trains tbe country over and
send this intelligence to Washington. In dne
time the railroad companies receive an official
communication levying punishment in the
shape of heavy fines. The various trains that
have been late are enumerated, and we at once
communicate with our various Division Super
intendents and find the cause of delay. Often
times it may have been the railroad company's
fault, and we own up, but if our roadway was
washed by a storm, or Providence in some other
fashion blocked the way, we file an affidavit to
that effect at Washington and ask lor a remis
sion of the penalty.
"The Pennsylvania Railroad Company did
not pay for the countless delays resulting from
the Johnstown flood.nor will It be. out of pocket
for the recent stoppage of Atlantic City'smalls.
And," continued the railroad man, "there are
other delays which, as common sense dictates,
we should not be beld responsible tor, but there
is a wide margin for the play of caprice on the
part of the Postmaster General and his asso
ciates. Fined $35 nn Honr.
"Under the last administration certain prece
dents were established as to tbe extent of rail
road responsibility, which were eminently fair
to the public as well as to the railroads, but the
new broom which has performed service for
the last few months, in its effort to brush away
supposed abuses, has borne too bard nn the
railroads. Uncalled for fines have been In
flicted, and petty irregularities magnified, bat
this will all be remedied as time goes on. Prac
tice gets the better of theory ere many months
have passed over an administration."
"How large are the fines that are paid?"
"Of overy amount, from a few cents up to
many hundreds of thousands. For the delay
of a mail train on one of our small branches a
fine of about SI has sometimes been charged
against us. As the ronte becomes more im
portant, tbe money loss .to us grows accord
ingly. For tbe past few months the Pennsyl
vania Railroad has run a special mail and ex
fress train from New York City to St. Louis.
t makes better time than any passenger ex
press between those points, and the Govern
ment pays for tbe service about $40,000 a
month. That is about $55 an hour, and the fine
for every hour's delay comes to about this
figure. If the train were six hours late we
should be charged over $300. In the case of
other mail trains the cbarce for an hour's late
ness mieht be several hundred dollars, possi
bly JL000.
Everr Pair Worth a Dollar.
"Such severe discipline makes the railroad
management strain every nerve to keep to
schedule time. Every puff of the locomotive
is worth a dollar. The wheels must wbizz"over
the track at flying speed if necessary. Where
there has been delay it must bemado up, and
60 or 70 miles an'hour is sometimes made by the
mail train with a price on its head. There is a
story it may be fiction that a railroad com
pany once altered the time-piece to escape a
fine. The temptation to such a plan is cer
tainly great; for what with all the efficiency of
railroad service in this country, yearly fines
run sometimes mountains high."
The umbrella in the twentieth century will
be the symbol of "these selfish days we live in,
with which every man shields his own head
and lets the drippings drop down his neighbor's
back. The chambered nautilus, though
would be a truer symbol, at least it it is true.as
tho poets have written about it that it builds
each year a new room in its shell, and each
room wider than the last. Withal! our short
comings, wo are doing thai: Things are not as
tbey shonld be, and tbe millennium is still a
good way off, but we are getting nearer to it
all the time.
I see that they had a nautilus to crown the
birthday cake at Beverly Farm the other day
when Dr. Holmes rassed the eightieth mile
stone. And they had a silver loving cup to
give him. Dr. Holmes has now these many
years been Inspiring people to bulla more
stately mansions for their souls, and this-very
largely by the contagion of his own kindly, lay.
ing, sympabueLic bpinu y e will an nave that
spirit in the twentieth century.
Dr. Holmes has probably got more out of his
SO years than Methusalah got out of hi
800 (Was that the number?), becanso
life to-nay has so much more of interest
in it than it had in that very young time, and
because Dr. Holmes is so much more interested
in life than we have any reason to think
Methusalah was. It is helpful to read any
thing which he writes. If only for the sake of
catching his bright, interested way of lookins
at things.
Mr. Andrew Long, In a paper nnder the curl
ously chosen titlo of "American Drolls," calls
Dr. Holmes "the master of them all." Mr. Lon"
has a largo measure of this same charmin"
way of looking at things, and this same de
Ughtful fashion of helping us to see through
his eyes. His Lost Lead ert is a gathering to.,
getberof brief papers from tbe Daily News.'
He doesn't mean-by a "lost leader" what Mr."
THE COErSE AROSE 'AND TALKED.
A Woman Prepared for the Grave While
In n Trnnce.
Buffalo, September 16. Mrs. William
Diemens, of Wilson, In Niagara county, appar
ently died Thursday night of a low fever. The
body was prepared for tbe grave, and the next
morning her relatives gathered about her bed
and discussed the advisability of sending mes
sengers to notify her friends of her death. In
tbe midst of their talk tbe supposed corpse
arose and said tbat she would act as messenger.
Her relatives ran from the room, but return
ing, found her not only alive, but in a fair way
to complete recovery. She explained that,
tbongh in a trance, she had from the first
realized all tbat had gone on around ber.
Still Able to Kick.
From tbe New York Herald.;
Prohibition is dead, they say. Well, as for
tbe two fore legs we can't say: but as to thetwo
bind legs, you had better keep clear of them
for some time to come.
ODD ITEMS FROM ABROAD.
STERLING'S REMARKABLE SIGHT.
He Conld See With His Eye While It Was
Out of the Socket
From tbe Bridgeport Farmer.
A caller at the office of Dr. F. M. Wilson this
morning was Mr. Julian H. Sterling, artist,
journalist and official draughtsman of the
Housatonic Railroad system. His mission was
to consult the doctor about one of his eyes,
which had been paining him intensely for an
honr or two previous. The doctor ascribed tbe
irritation to the presence of some foreign sub
stance, and, when a superficial examination
failed to locate it, be determined it would be
necessary to take tbe eye out To this the
patient agreed. Dr. Wilson temporarily de
prived the organ of all feeling by spraying it
with cocaine, and then forced out the eyeball.
A cinder was found to be the cause ot the
trouble. This was removed, and the eye re
placed in its socket
The operation was entirely painless, but tbe
feature about it which struck the subject as
absolutely ludicrous was the fact that while
the eyeball was lying on his cheek he could see
with it the oar on that side, the power of vision
being fully retained. With the other eye be
also obtained a lull view of the eyo tbat was
resting on his cheek. The coeaine caused a
dilation of the pupil to nearly twice its natural
size, and this condition remained for some time
after the operation.
The London strike, which has been settled
after having cost tbe workingmen over 310,000,
000. has not been With out Its useful lessons. It
is the first time la the industrial history that
unskilled workers have, triumphed over capital
ists. The lower class of laborers have been
taught tbe virtue of temperance, and great
numbers of them bave signed the pledge. Paul
du Cbailla bas aroused the ire of the English
by writing uncomplimentary things about their
Viking ancestors. Herbert Spencer's biogra
phy is being prepared. The latest Whltechapel
murder remains a mystery. Boulanger is still
in London, and it Is rumored that he will be
something of a figure In tbe coming political
campaign in France.. Emperor William has
been cordially received everywhere, and Is reas
onably sure of annanlmous support In case of
trouble. Count Bismarck bas made a secret
visit to Italy on account ot the "Vatican
troubles.
Henry 8. Ives Is now charged with forgery In
bis financial transactions. The amount which,
It is alleged, he soughtto secure by this method
was 57,000,000. Holzbay, tbe train robber. Is
sulking In prison, closely guarded. His sweet
heart cannot be found. Tbe Relief Commis
sion will at once distribute the remaining II,
600,000 among the Johnstown sufferers. Mrs.
Langtry has secured a divorce at last. Two
young men at Avoca, Pa., engaged In a prize
fight for the hand of agin: Examination into
the accounts of the Pension Office shows a
shortage of cash, as compared with tbe vouch
ers. A man named Lacey, claiming to be tbe
advance agent of a circus, has victimized
Wheeling business men.
xc.
In a quarrel over a game of cards Giovanni
Francesobiello stabbed and killed bis brother
Michele in a house on Archlllo street, Kast
End, Saturday night. A serious blockade of
freight cars on tbe Junction Railroad is re
ported. Tronble between that road and the
Pittsburg and Western is supposed to be the
cause. Chief Bigelow states that he has re
ceived a letter from. Mrs. Scbenler, and that
the prospects are favorable for a park. .Other
park projects are progressing welt A strange
funeral service was beld at Foxburg last
Wednesday, a complete account of which was
given. The Chairman of tbe Pittsburg Relief
Committee still insists that 1125,000 is due from
Governor Beaver.
The referee decided that the Teemer-Gau-daur
race should be rowed again, but the con
testants refused to do this, and the stakes were
withdrawn. The Washington club defeated
the Pittsburg players 10 to 7. Other sporting
news was of an interesting character,
m.
"Andras Normaine's Duel." a French-American
novelette by the renowned aotress.Sara
Bernhart, was given complete. It was a choice
bit of fiction. The capital of the Ottoman Em
pire was described ina graphic; sketch by
Frank G. Carpenter. Rill Nye made a good
deal of fun of the sensational methods of re
porting lately adopted in New York. "A Sta
tistical Stndy of Trades Unions" was the sub
ject of a valuable paper by a staff writer. Tbe
historical associations clusteringabontBrowns
ville were pleaslnglysketchedby "Jacksonian."
Shirley Dare contributed a story that will
serve as a lesson to parents on tbe training of
boys. Ernest H-Helnricb's story, "The Musical
Wonder," was ingenious and well told. Teemer,
the oarsman, described the progress made In
tbe art of rowing. Mrs. Frank Leslie discussed
the comparative value of beauty and wealth to
women. Clara Belle and Bessie Bramble con
tributed interesting letters. Rev. George
Hodges' paper on the parable of tbe Pharisee
and Publican, contained an instructive lesson.
Olive Weston furnished an entertaining
column on "Queens in Exile." The preserving
or specimens of birds ana animals formed tbe
subject of M. C. Williams' article- A. variety
of 'miscellaneous matterand the asoaldepart
ments completed an excellent number.
CUKI0US CWtMWATWS,
Queen Victoria new weighs 1M b4s.
Siegfried KnoepgiiMBor, at Cbisg,
SfJl?? ? MBa eB ky ottor ot eewt tef
Siegf flea Bttttoassaksr.
An old bear and ber two cabs took a
mmJS'J stroU brongh tbe streets of EdenriHe,
Midland connty. ajiclL, the hr day, .
A letter landed in Ann Arbor tfee efter
day which was labeled, "Look out! Tkie letter
was written at th tnn v vixj tu. Tb.
goose that wrote it bangs high."
Two climbers of Mt Ararat, KajakH,
found In perfect preservation a minlmam tber-
registered 50 degrees below zero, ceatfenwte:
P. L. Parker, of Ann Arbor, wisfees to
gracious be bad torn that old sidewalk op him
self. The men to whom be let the lobof'baHd
Inghlra anew sidewalk found aSWgold vieee
and some surer money under the oldwaiJt
It is reported that a Fremont, Ne.t
lady, recently deceased, had became so
strongly attached to her two Jersey cows."'
which had ssppHed her stock of milk for seme-
time before her death, tbat she Insisted tbat at
" ww UWJ SttOtUtt 9BIB DO Sailed.
A, man nevsr appreciates tbe value of a t
newspaper so thoroughly as when he cannot;
get It. The first copy of newspaper Mwt
reached Atlantic Ctty through the floods was
quickly bongbt by a-man who thought he sot it,
cheap for K 60, The regular prlee was 2 cents.
The idea tbat oae can really love bt
once stands corrected In tbe case of John
Wales, aNewbnrgman. He has bees married
fSH? Itlfferlnt Bd n ft7 he truly
JrJ?,.ei?,cl,aJ!!dteTBT7 ease. and he never.
weitipatkiK without carrying a package of
gum-drops along for his Ideal.
The latest excitement at JeSersenTlUe,',:'
Ind., comes from the claim tbat the dtyJaHi :
haunted by the ghost ot Tim SnlHvaa, who
hanged himself while a prisoner ia September,
J885. Nightly at 12 o'clock a sound is heard as
ir a heavy body had swung against an iron
door, and this is followed by a gurgling sound
very suggestive to tbe affrighted jaSeiv
A Miss Cfeanney, of Columbu,0.t has
had a fright that will doubtless teach ber a les
son. She used for her complexion a mixture of
arsenic and nitrate of silver. Then she went to
the White Sulphur Spnnffs and took thebaths.
The sulphur decomposed the silver salts In her
skin and turned her so black that she has eon
into retirement and will sot be seen again for a
J CAT.
An old trick has been played in New
York ona prominent actor. He resolved letters
asking for autographs, and inclosing cards and
stamps and directed envelopes. He wrote ba.
name on tbe cards and thought no mere of
them until bis manager showed them to bte
with the words "Pass two" wrMtea oa eaesi '
one above the name. Tbey bad beenfousdia.
tbe doorkeeper's box. v- r
-i-Cbarles Mead passed through Ceiw-
bus, Ind, tbe other day having In nM efeasge a--remarkable
family of rattlesnakes, wHeabo
capturedin Brown county, 20 miles weetof
that place. The largest of tbe reptHes raea;
ured 9 feet 2 inches In length, its crreasafer
encewaa nine Inches. When discovered, by
Mr. Mead this monster snake bad with it Bin o
young rattlers, all of which were captured. An
exciting time was had in taking them alive. "
The Prince of Monaco, who las jot
died, reigned over a trifle less than eight and a
half sqnare miles of territory, with a popula
tion of 8,000 persons, all titled nobles la their
own right. His principality is defended by an
army numbering 73 office,! and men. and his
people, besides enjoying aristocratic titles, are
exempt from taxation, the expenses of tho
empire being paid by gambling boose franchises.
MORE S1LYERN THAN SPEECH.
TnE "scab" In England is a "blackleg."
ArTEit October 1 the French soldiers' pay
will be 27 centimes a day, or a little OTcr5
cents.
Miitxte PAX.MEH Is to play the title role In
"Cinderella," the next pantomime at Her
Majesty's Theater.
Tub amount given away by the Emperor of
Austria during his recent visit to Berlin was
21.000 marks, of which 15,000 went to the poor
of the city.
THE tan shoo may have a permanent future
after all. One of the results of tbe recent
maneuvers of the fleet bas been the suggestion
that the marines should wear tan or brown
shoes henceforth instead of black ones, and
brown gloves instead of white. -
The most famous barber now living, proba
bly, is abput to celebrate his silver wedding in
Paris. He is M. Adolph Parrues. He was the
greatest of his kind GO years ago. He num
bered among his clients Chateanbriand, Lam
art in e, Victor Hugo, Tbeodolph Gautier, Mile.
Mars and Malibran.
While the Ajax was engaged In shell prac
tice after the recent maneuver, a shell ex
ploded within a 38-ton gun, that had been run
out in tbe turret to bo fired, and the gun burst.
Tbe greater part of it fell into the sea, but one
piece flew into the turret, one seaman being
slightly wounded.
Fifteen hundred and flfty-efght million
letters, or 41 per bead of population, were de
Uvered in the United Kingdom during tbo year
which ended on the Hist of last March. Besides
that there were 800,000,000 postal cards, news
papers and parcels. Tho telegraph service
showed a deficit of 240,000.
Theke arc several good reasons for tbe at
tempt to train swallows for military messen
gers, Instead of carrier pigeons. The swallows
are swifter and more difficult marks to shoot
at. The experiment so far promises welt A
young swallow from- Roubaix flew home from
Paris, 163 miles, in an hour and SO minutes.
A GOOD TALKER AT 104.
The Oldest Inhabitant of Long Island a
Smart Woman Yet.
tSFECUI. TELEGRAM TO THX DISrXTCIT.I
New York, September 15. The oldest per
son on Long Island Is Mrs. Rachel Stillwaggon,
of Flushing. She will celebrate her 104th birth
day on Wednesday. She is tbe daughter of
Stephen and Hannah Acker, who, when she
was born, lived on a farm at Tarrytown. With
her parents she moved to New York City when
she was 12 years old and lived in a house on
Stone street near Broad street, for many
years. Tbe whipping post the postofflce. the
debtors' prison in City Hall Park, "Bridewell"
In Broadway and other places she graphically
describes. Mrs. Stitlwaggon Is rather short.
Her eyes are gray and they appear to be useful
to her, but her sight now Is much' impaired.
Her bearing Is only slightly defective, and she
is a good talker. Her mind is as clear as it ever
was, and she shows little evidence of her won
derful ago In conversation.
Until she was 86 years old she performed her
own housework and made her own dreses.
She now uses a cane in walking.and she suffers
from lameness in her left knee. She also is
troubled by a numbness in ber left band and
arm at night On February 14. 1811, she married
uaviu Qtuiwaggon, wno was a cuiicuwi,
HA-vpn nhllrlren wprf born to them. Only three J
of whom are now living.
How Grandfather Harrison Complimented a
Throng of Yonna Ladles.
From the Washington Post.:
A W. Faulkner, of Columbia, La., who has
been a member of the Legislature for 18 years.
Is In Washington. Althongh he bas lived In
Louisiana for 43 years, Mr. Faulkner was born
in Ohio, and he tells an interesting story of the
campaign of 1840, in which the grandfather of
the present President was elected.
"I was quite a boy then," said Mr. Faulkner
to a reporter, "but I took a deep Interest in
politics. I was a Democrat, but when I heard
that General Harrison was to speak at the
town of Ripley, 12 miles away, I determined to
attend the meeting, and I walked the
whole distance. It was the first great
crowd that i nad seen, and I remem
ber It well. It was estimated that there
were 00.000 people present. Many of them had
come great distances in large canoes, dug out
of buckeye wood and mounted on wheels.
Others had constructed log cabins on their
wagons and had driven to Ripley with teams of
as many as 10-horses, in some instances. Tbe
stage from which General Harrison was to
speak was decorated, and on it were seated
about a dozen young and pretty girls.' They
wore garlands ot buckeye balls and carried
flags bearipg a picture of a log cabin. Finally
General Harrison appeared. He was an old
man then, and was looking, as he felt, quite
fatigued and tired.
"lb a few words he thanked the immense au
dience for their interest in politics and in his
success, but asked to be excused from making
a speech, as he did not feel able to undergo the
exertion. 'I cannot make a speech,' he said,
'but I can do something else. 1 can kiss all
these youDtr ladles, and J am coiner to do It.'
What tbat, he kissed every one of the girls in
succession right before the whole crowd. You
ongbt to bavo heard the shout tbat went up. I
believe the echo of it reached the next coun
ty." An Appropriate Emblem.
From the Detroit Free Pres3.1
Haytiis to have a new national flag, and
Wants ideas and suggestions. While this is
our busy day, we would suggest two tomcats
hanging over a clothes Hue on a jailer back
ground. Abundance of Good Timber Here,
From the Philadelphia Inquirer.;
Penpsylrania can offer tbe President one of
any number"of good soldiers with high ad
ministrative ability If he wants a Pension Com
missioner from this 8tate.
TKI-STATE TRIFLES.
Ensicr Snld Than Done.
From theNew York Tribnne.l
It wouldn't be a bad idea to put a strait
jacket around "old ocean's grayand melancholy
waist."
TELLING A FORTUNE.
Would you have your fortune told?
Cross my palm with shining gold,
And I'll tell It true.
In the future dim I see
Fortune, love, prosperity,
All awaiting yon.
Soon a maid with raven hair.
Star-lit eyes, and beauty rare.
You will meet by chance.
ISoldly yon will woo, and win.
JIappy fates will aid yoa In
TbU, your life romance.
She will bring you wealth in store
Happiness, and love, and more,
Blest will be your life.
Snch good fortune comes to few,
All mankind. mil envy you
Such a perfect wife.
Would you know the lady's name?
Yes, of courseraud who could blame
You for your request?
. And tho half has not been told,
Cross my palm again with gold,
And I'll tell the rest.
SomtrvUU Journal.
Tns meanest man in Ohio lives at Newton
Falls. His wife tumbled into tbe Mahoning
and on being rescned a four-pound bass was
found entangled In her dress improver. When
her husband found this out be wanted to set
her again.
As Ohio man has written Jay Gould a beg
ging letter every day for the last 450 days, and
in his last he announced that be had purchased
510 worth of stationery and calculated to keep
turning the crank until begot some response-.
Skveh pounds and three ounces of bass
hooked Itself on the fishing line of Lewis Mc
Closkey at Norristown.
James N. Roger, of Lebanon, has a pear
tree which has borne a large crop this summer,
and is again in full bloom.
A bicycle which can bo made Into a quad
rlcycle, and can be used by either man or
woman, has been invented by a Lancaster
genius.
Several hundred yellow jackets having
located in tho lock tender's horn at tbe Little
Dam, Reading, some vicious young men asked
their acquaintances to go to the house, knock
upon ir, and give their opinion of the peculiar
noise they would hear. Messrs. H. Nerder, C.
Troxel, C. Hiester, W. Humbert and several
others who did so were badly stung as a result.
Six different couples were applicants for the
leading part at tho proposed wi-dding at the
Doylestown fair. Two have been selected and
will divide the honors and gifts. .
A Wheelino girl of 18 has received .nu
merous proposals of marriage. The last was
from a man 6 years old who is a paralytic
Four yean ago lastFourth or July Miss
Nelly Noyes, Captain Noyes' daughter, of
Portland, Ore., after eating a peach planted
the pit It grew and flourished, and is now a
handsome, thrifty tree about 15 fset high, and
bas on It some 200 peaches or remarkably flno
flavor, equal if not superior in size to the lar
gest ever seen here, many ot them measuring
lOJf to U inches in circumference. The stem of
tbe tree is between three and four Inches in
diameter, and the spreading limbs with tbeir
load of magnificent fruit are a perfect marvel
for four years' growth.
A Saratoga reporter espied a couple of
young ladies and two men. one a policeman,
searching with a lam'p along a street there bite
the other evening. One of the ladies, with a
trembling voice, stated that she had visited
the Hathom Spring; during the evening: and.
had lost analrof diamond uhHum vninf ,tF -?
SSaVfromacajo which sno beld in her nasd.,
She thought she had dropped them on the MiT-Lr
She had straightened up from her stooping,
position while speaking, and was about to com-
mence the search again. As she pushed nack
tbe hair above ber ear, she gave a little cry of
joy and exclaimed: "I've found them In ray
ears! Really, I bad forgotten that 1 had placed
them therel"
Noah Haragrum and William and
John Lewis, while out hunting Wednesday,
had an experience with bigger game than tbey
were looking for. They were- ranging the
woods in Sussex county, N. Yn when their
dogs treed a large wildcat Before the hunters
reached tbe spot the beast bad whipped the
dogs and taken refuge in a cave. After vainly
trying to smoke ber out Maragmm started
into the care with bis shotgun. He bad hardly
entered when be saw tbe green blazing eyes of
the animal and fired at them. In an Instant
the cat sprang upon bim. and began clawing
his face and shoulders in a terrible manner.
Maraerum stazcered ont of the cave with tha
howlinz cat on his shoulders, and his compan
ions, not daring to shoot beat the animal to
death with clubs. Maraerum fainted from
shook and loss of blood when released. Ho
was. frightf ally disflcured, and may loose tbe
sight of one eye. The catamount measured
over five feet ba length.
A case of interest to stock-owners is now
on trial before the Circuit Court for Baltimore
county at Towsontown. It grew out of a judg
ment given by a county magistrate in favor of
William Tanner against Dr. Francis W. Pat
terson, United States Veterinary Inspector, for
S50- Tunney, who lives at Cross Keys, on tbo
Falls road, about four miles, from Baltimore,
had sued tbe inspector for injuries altered to
bave been Inflicted on one of his cows by at
taching a numbered tag to the tnimal's ear.
He claims tbat the fright caused by the tag
ging operation Injured the cow to au extent
that she will not revover for a year or two.
The opening statement of the other side wag
that the tag was attached as directed by tha
Lire Stock Sanitary Board, which passed a res
olution that all cattle within a radius ot six
miles of the City Hall should be marked with
numbered tags, the object being to stamp ont
pleuro-pneumonla from that locality. It was
stated that the sum of $200,000 had been ex
pended by tbe United States in attempting to
eradicate this disease.
CLIPPED BITS OF WIT.
v0i
f)StSSBB
They call gum an elective at Vassar be
cause tbe students needn't take it unless they
chew. Mumey't Weekly.
The kind and correct thing to say to tha
comer home is: "I hope you feel rested from your
vacation." Nobody says, '"rested by your vaca
tion' except those who haven't had.any. Boston
Commontcealth.
Miss Aneientmaid (to Rusticboy) Yes,
dear, I return to the elty to-morrow. Alas! we
must Indeed parti Bnt why do yoa wep?
Kustlcboy I am sympathizing with the elty
fellows. Tiro bifttagt.
"Is your father easy to get along with?"
asked George as they sat on the doorstep.
Why, certainly. "What made too ask?"
'Nothing: only he seems to be a good deal of a
kicker." Washington Capital.
Old Gentleman (passing through hall)
I don't want to see yoa kiss mv daughter again,
young man. Do yoa hear?
roungman(lnparlor)-Ido,lr;ril close the
door next time. Asia Xork Sun.
, Head Clerk I'm letting ray whiskers
grow. sir.
So I eo: but I can't permit employes to grow
their whiskers in business hours. They idust do
that in their own time. Toronto Brip.
Briggs I had a dickens of a time to-day,
I tell you.
Ilragzs-What was It?
Brlggs-Jutforfanlshookxnynst at a Wind
beggar across the street and be chased me three
blocks up an alley before I could get away. Terr
Haute BnterprUe.
A Gap Somewhere "Did you hear my
speech last evening?" said a Congressman to a
friend.
Yes; pretty good effort."
It was short-handed."
I thought that there wss something of that
kind about It. A clerk or a private secretary off
on his leave? I Imagined when I heard it that yoa
were short-handed somewhere. Washington
CrUie.
Mrs. A. 1 met Mr. B. on Madison ave
nsethisattcrnoon. and I hardly recognized nun.
Sir. A. What was the matter with bim?
Airs. A.-IIe was ont fishing and got dreadfully
sunburnt, lie said it was caused by the reflection
of tbe water.
Mr. A.-Kefleetiou of the water? Humph, the
nflsetloaarthawatfirwlll snnburaa&ian down
Ina cellar tfhe takes as blgafiask with him as H.'S
does when he goes fliBlng.-2af ovtmgi.
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