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THE PITTSBURG UISHA.TOH, 'SUNDAY, JUNE 23 1880.
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ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, ISM.
Vol., No.130. Entered t Pittsburg Postofflce,
November 14, 1SST, as seeona-class matter.
Business Office 87 and 99 Fifth Avenue.
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ZEX DiBrxTCU for six months ending June 1, 1839,
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Tux Dispatch for May, 1839,
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PITTSBURG, SUNDAY, JUNE 23, 1SS9.
SEVERITY "WAS BEQUIBED.
Judge Stowe's response to the plea for a
light sentence in the case of H. F. Voight,
the defaulting cashier of the Farmers' and
Mechanics' Bank, was more pertinnt than
favorable. Instead of taking the lenient
TJew, the Judge declared that it was a case
lor severe punishment, and carried out that
opinion by a sentence of six years in the
penitentiary.
The view of the Court was certainly more
in accordance with the public requirements
than the plea for leniency. The latter was
the usual one, that the cashier was led into
peculation and inlly expected to return the
bank's money. But if there is any class
which oucht to know that to use fiduciary
funds to speculate with lor the hope of pri
vate gain is a breach of trust, it is that to
which this defendant belonged. To treat
snch offenses lightly and to punish severely
the man who steals small sums would be, as
the Judge said, a parody on justice.
This sentence of six years to the peniten
tiary will be likely to put the practice- of
speculating with other people's money out
of fashion, for a time, among bank officials,
at least.
AH EXAHPLE TOE OuH CITIZE1TS.
The supply of a number of public drink
ing fountains to Pittsburg by an eminent
and apparently philanthropic citizen of
another city, makes good the lack which has
long been prominent, but not especially
creditable to the Iron City. The fact that
the utter lack of public fountains here has
been remedied by extraneous aid might
stimulate pur home capital to efforts in the
line of supplying the other lack in which we
hare undesirable prominence, namely, the
total lack of parks and boulevards. "We hare
abundance of practical sites for parks in the
ranee from the Point, orer the hilltops, to
the open spaces of the East End; bnt so far
the money for improving them has been
lacking. "When New England capital
gives us fountains might not Pittsburg cap
ital give us parks, or at least a start for one
on condition that the city will undertake
the work of improving it
ME. HUNTIHGTOITS PHILAHTHEOFT.
The statement that Xing Leopold, of Bel
gium, in order to secure the construction of
a railroad from the 'West African coast to
the Congo region above Stanley Pool, has
obtained irom Mr. C. P. Huntington, of this
country, a subscription to the stock of the
railway of 500,000, creates a good deal of
interest. Mr. Huntington is reported as
'saying that lie subscribed for that stock
purely out of philanthropic motives.
This may be the case, but an intimate
acquaintance with Mr. Huntington's phil
anthropic principles in the matter of rail
road investments, strengthens the opinion
that Mr. Huntington is confident of getting
a very good and material return for his
philanthropy, and not after many days.
The scoffers will be likely to incline to the
opinion that the opportunities in the con
structions of the Cod co Railroad, for rich
returns in the line of construction
contracts and stock watering operations,
will permit those who get upon the
ground floor of the enterprise to
make their $500,000 worth of philanthropy
yield them about 50,000,000; which is about
the proportion of profits on philanthropy
which Mr. Huntington and his associates
considered the correct thing, in the matter
of that other philanthropic enterprise, the
Central Pacific Railroad.
The Congo Ilailroad will be a great benefit
to Central Africa; but we would not like to
guarantee the Congo traders and shippers
against the chances that they will have to
pay large-sized dividends on Mr. Hunting
ton's philanthropy.
OuTt BELLIGERENT POWEBS.
The regulaticn corporate warfare has
broken out in Jersey'City, between the Erie
and the Delaware, Lackawanna and "West
ern Railroads, orer the question which shall
occupy certain streets in that city, which
were originally dedicated to the use of the
public It is instrnetire as well as wonder
iul to observe how exactly these fights
uuplicate each other and how invariably
they all terminate in the levying of petty
warfare by the corporations.
In this case, as usual, one railroad dis
covered that it wanted to occupy certain
streets with additional tracks, and obtained
permission of the City Councils to do so.
Ot course as soon as that permission was
granted the other railroad discovered that
it wanted the same street itself, and pro
ceeded by the use ot municipal influence to
obtain the same permission that the other
railroad had got. Consequently when one
of them set its men to work laying tne
track, the other turned Up With a gang, and
a small sized riot was the result Each
corporation is strengthening its forces and
continuing its policy of hiring a class of
W
men that will be ready to break out into
acts of riolence, eTidently for the sole pur
pose of taking what it wants by the strong
arm without regard to law or rights.
"This Is the unirersal rule of corporate
action. Something either in the character
of the legal advice that the corporations ob
tain, or in the influences which control
their executive policy, seems to make it
necessary for them to fight first and go to
law arterward. The result is that when
ever two corporations want the same right
of way, or one wants the right of way and
the other does not wish the first to have it,
both proceed to the levying of armed forces
with all the industry and about the same
disregard of public right, that character
ized the feudal barons in the early part of
the dark ages.
Some comment was made the other day
upon the fact that a Chicago corporation
proposes to undertake the governmental
function of execution. In this connection
it seems no more than fair to say that when
corporations undertake to levy war the
addition to their powers of that of killing
off criminals, is somewhat unimportant.
MB. FINK'S TBOTBLE.
The pending resignation of Mr. Albert
Fink, the father and executive of the trunk
line pool, creates considerable talk in rail
road circles. It may be pertinent in pass
ing to observe that the sensation is rather
out of proportion to the importance of the
erent Mr. Fink has before this developed
the habit of sending in his resignation when
the trunk line pool does not run to kuit him;
but the railroad presidents hare generally
been able, by renewing their promises of
good behavior, to persuade him to keep on
drawing his salary.
But the cause which erokes this resigna
tion of Mr. Fink is of especial interest to
Pittsburg. Being the apostle of the scheme
to suppress competition, that gentleman's
resignations hare always been evoked when
the forces ot competition prore too much
for (he pool. It is now stated that the re
duction in iron ore rates for this section is
what has soured Mr. Fink's existence. The
Pittsburg public is informed that iron rates
are "out of plumb," and that the old rates
will hare to be restored, presumably tinder
the penalty that if this is not done Mr. Fink
will decline to take back his resignation.
Possibly Pittsburg can reconcile itself to
the latter alternative. If Mr. Fink's life in
the pool is not worth living, unless Pitts
burg pays double prices for its transporta
tion, this section will be able to consent to
Mr. Fink's retirement, and still to cherish
the hope that the railroads will be able to
wriggle along without his presiding genius,
as they did in days of yore.
THE PBOPOSED SHIP-CAKAL.
The renewed agitation lor a ship canal
from Pittsburg to Lake Erie contemplates a
reversion to old ways of carriage that may
excite some surprise; but the real cause for
surprise is that the project has not been
taken up with more vigor heretofore. In
this, as in many othei things, the people ot
"Western Pennsylvania and the Ohio Valley
have rested only too content with the nat
ural advantages to hand, easy of develop
ment. The waterway to the south and
the opportunities of the immense stretch of
navigable lake waters hare been almost 1
wholly unimproved.
"But the day for these means of trans
portation lias not departed. As the inter
ests and commercial undertakings of the
country multiply many plans must arise
for the facilitation of traffic in the interior.
The ship canal from Late Erie to Pittsburg,
a preliminary survey of which the State
has already authorized, is one of these.
The transportation of the country is now
taxed uncommonly every year to pay divi
dends on water in the capitalization of the
railroads. At first sight it clearly looks as
though there would be an abundance of
freight, in the carrying of which time is no
special object, to meet interest on the cost of
an ample waterway between Lake Erie and
the Ohio. Incidentally such an enterprise
would inevitably lead to important better
ments of navigation the whole way down
the river lo New Orleans.
It is right that the State and its represen
tatives in Congress should take a business
hold on this matter. In place of fighting
over petty patronage or factional or partisan
advantage, what would well become men of
brains and ambition in public and business
life is to seize hold of their opportunities to
benefit their locality. Rivalry in such good
works would be welcomed by the public.
AN ANAECHISTIC EVASION.
Judge "Williamson, of Chicago, has given
anarchy a serious set back. If he had not
sent Anarchist Ducey to jail the other day
for declining to serve as a juror in a rob
bery case because he did not believe in con
victing people of crime, it is very likely
that the ranks of the Anarchists would hare
been swelled considerably.
Everybody knows how great are the ob
jections of many of our best citizens to serv
ing on juries. Many of them are able to
escape jury service, but some get caught,
and in spite of piteous excuses are cribbed
in the box. We can readily imagine bow
such unfortunates as these would hare
jumped at Mr. Ducey's conscientious plea
that his principles would not permit him to
convict a man, if Judge "Williamson
had sot decided the excuse invalid
and changed the irksomeness of
jury service to the disgrace of a
night in jail. It would have been a very
amusing sight to see the bloated bondholder,
and the crushing capitalist, and millionaires
of all sorts and sizes standing on the plat
form of anarchy and proclaiming their in
ability to conrlct any fellow man of .crime.
GEAMMAB AND AGBIdTLTUBE.
We regret to observe that the students'
of the Michigan Agricultural College
are not disposed to accept the broad
and liberal view of elastic grammat
ical rules that appear from some in
dications to be characteristic of the day.
They demonstrate this lact by petitioning the
Governor Qt that State for the removal of
one of the professors of that institution be
cause he habitually uses such terms as "I
hare saw," "I've came" and "you wasn't"
The objection seems to be a pertinent one
as against a college professor,; aud yet
whether it is so vital as to force his removal,
depends very largely on the chair he holds.
If he undertakes to instruct the students on
grammar and rhetoric, with such examples
ol the applied science, it is plain that his
grammatical heresies are as much out of
place, as the doctrine of a modified hell
would be in a Presbyterian theological
seminary. But it is well to remember
tlit a great many men have occu
pied high places worthily, and yet
maintained exactly such strained re
lations with the rules of Lindley
Murray. "We are acquainted with lights of
the banking and business world who follow
the custom of the Michigan pro'etsor on ''I
have saw" almost as religiously as Southern
society adopts the rule of the Missouri Uni
versity against souuding the "r." 2a6h
Chandler, John A. Logan, Uncle Daniel
Drew and Solon Chase are eminent exam-
pies of the fact that great men call fracture
the English grammar and still be great
If this Michigan professor, therefore,
holds a position in the instruction of agri
cultural science that does not bear directly
on grammar, he may be still permitted to
hold his position. For instance, if it is his
duty to instruct the rising Michigan agri
culturist on the scientific method of clean
ing out stables or killing hogs, his gram
matical eccentricities may be not only over
looked but even tolerated as in harmony
with the subject Some of the best lights in
the agricultural world on the subject of
slaughtering hogs or shearing sheep take
exactly the view of grammar that he does;
and the practical results in pork and wool
are not a whit injured thereby.
These considerations should induce the
Michigan students to take a liberal view of
the grammatical question. The rules of
grammar may not be elastic, but their ap
plication in practical life generally stretches
them a good deal.
PINCHING THE"BBEADWIHHEBS.
The industry of the .Northwestern millers
in putting up the price of flour beyond all
relation to the price of wheat, is shown by
the fact that they have succeeded in ad
vancing their asking prices for flour 50
cents per barrel within the past two weeks.
An attempt has also been made to adrance
wheat on the report of short stocks and un
favorable weather, but notwithstanding all
efforts of that sort the price of wheat has
continued to decline. The millers' combi
nation, however, continues to screw up the
price of flour Until it is now between SO
cents and $1 per barrel higher than is indi
cated by the relative price of wheat. Of
course, the inevitable result is that con
sumers will buy less flour, and that the mill
ers who sell their products at a reasonable
margin will hold the market until the
Northwestern crowd begin to see the advis
ability of a decent respect for the laws of
trade. In the meantime, the supply of
breadstuff's is artificially enhanced in price,
and an attempt is made to impose an exces
sive charge on the cost of life for the benefit
of the few, by the stereotyped trust method.
AN EMBLEMATIC BLOSSOM,
The suggestions for adopting a national
flower for this country have occasioned a
great deal of discussion throughout the
various parts of this country. An immense
varietv of tastes has been displayed, ranging
from the sunflower, which is naturally the
choice of that shining luminary, the New
York Sun, to Minneapolis XXX, which is
regarded by the great Northwest as about
the best flour that this country produces.
All these seleetions practically come to
nought in view of the obvious fact that the
one flower that can typify the characteris
tics of this nation completely is the modern
daisy. Some objections may be made to
this selection of a national flower from the
fact that one of the effete countries of the
older world has selected that flower as its
emblem. But the daisy selected by the
other nation is the modest, unobtrusive and
not particularly imposing bloss.,m which
has been known for centuries. It seems
hardly necessary to remark that the daisy
which typifies the United States is. not that
kind of a daisy.
The blossom to which we refer is of the
vociferous and enthusiastic character known
to baseball fields and otherwise trumpeted
forth by our national slang. This is an en
tirely distinct daisy from the modest rariety
known to Scotland. The United States
should adopt its own daisy as a national
flower, because this country is a daisy.
The information giren by the New York
Herald's cable special, that Mr. and Mrs.
John "W. Mackay are going to institute
libel proceedings against some of the Lon
don papers which persist in saying unpleas
ant things about those bonanza millionaires
is interesting, but the further declaration of
the Herald's special that "Mr. and Mrs,
Mackay's past is as pure as the origin of
their fortune," is open to criticism from the
standpoint of the Mackays. Inasmuch as
there is little to their past except the origin
of their lortune, the certificate is rather
equivocal. It is rendered still more so bv
some of the remarkably shady proceedings
which attended the acquirement of the mil
lions of all the bonanza kings.
General Jdbax, Eabitx"s renewed and
passionate declaration that he hoped he
may be struck by lightning if he ever, de
serted his faith in the Southern Confeder
acy, shows that the doughty General is
willing to take almost as big chances as the
buyers of tickets in his lottery have.
The Statement of the esteemed Chicago
iVetM that an Arkansas man permitted a
mad dog in Missouri to bite him the other
day.and that the result was fatal to the dog,
would be very interesting scientifically, if
corroborated. "We fear, however, that the
esteemed News has been imposed upon by
an exceedingly antiquated item. The inci
dent to which itreferred was reported in the
last century by that standard journalIst,Mr.
Oliver Goldsmith, in his very lively publi
cation entitled "The Vicar of "Wakefield,"
in an item as follows:
The man recovered ot tho bite
The dog it was that died.
The report that there is a scheme On foot
to convert that Bed pond out on Center ave
gue into a lake probably finds its sole found
ation in the ill success which has so far at
tended the efforts to unmake the lake which
has already created itself.
In connection with Mr. Carnegie's
cruise to the North Cape, the New York
Telegram says: "His Homestead workmen
are cruising around for a square meal."
This shows that the esteemed Telegram is
not acquainted with the Style of living of
the Pittsburg workmen. One of the last
things done by Mr. Carnegie's Homestead
workmen was to contribute a large sum to
the Johnstown sufferers, and they are now
cruising around to treat with their employ
ers on the subject of wages for next year, on
equal terms.
The practical evidence that the President
has resumed the work of distributing the
foreign missious and consulates conveys re
newed assurances to the Republican wheel
horses that this administration is not going
to be a failure.
The home rule prisoners in British
jails are forbidden the newspapers by their
jailers, which soma of the imprisoned prt
fess to regard- as the refinement of cruelty.
In point of fact, however, they would find
so little in the London papers fair to them
selves or generous to their cause that they
do not miss much com i or t There are bnt
two daily papers in London which cham
pion the home rule. Those which are
against it recognize no limit to their virtt
lence.
The report that Hippolyte Is cow the
conqueror of Hayti is calculated to impress
the outside world with the remarkable mili
tary abilities displayed by the Haytian war-
riors in winning victories through the press
discatches.
The surprise of the St.-Louis Olole
Hemocrat that Minister Reid, in his speech
to President Carnot, used the term United
States in the plural, "after the manner of
the States' Right Democrats," might be
modified, if our esteemed cotemporary would
study the fact that Minister Reid Used it
after the manner of the constitutional fath
ers who established this country.
The reduction of iron rates from Pitts
bure to New York is a sign that the rail
road world continues to move, and may per
haps furnish a reason why Mr. Fink hat to.
The Dispatch's Johnstown correspond
ent telegraphs that the report of 18 per cent
as the profit guaranteed to the contractors
by the State was an error either in transmit
sion or printing. The margin is ten per
cent That is a good large profit on a sure
thing, but not quite as bad as that repre
sented by the erroneous report '
The Allegheny team yesterday demon
strated the fact that it has its usual grip on
the bad luck which renders it familiar with
the localities about the bottom of the list.
The green midge, which is supposed to
be very destructive to the wheat crop, ib
now reported to be very numerous in the
"Western wheat fields and on the boards of
trade. So far as can beperoeived, however,
he is much more tidmerous among the bulls
on the boards of trade than he is in the
wheat fields.
The weather sharp who predicted some
thing unique and Dhenomenal in the line of
weather for June 22 has been vindicated,
It was a pleasant day.
The Alger and Piatt parties have started
for Alaska. The opinion of the adminis
tration is that if they can be persuaded to
stay there and absorb the politics of that
far-off territory, the purchase Of Alaska
will be vindicated as the best investment
which a Republican administration ever
made.
PEOMISENT PEOPLE,
Mr. Brush, of the arc electric light, owns a
million dollar house in Cleveland, O. He
was a newspaper reporter oh a salary of SIS a
week less than 15 years ago.
Mb. Richard Mansfield sailed from
Liverpool on the steamer Adriatic Wednesday,
and is expected to arrive in this country in
about a week. Mr. Mansfield will rest until
October, and then begin on his season's tour
Willi "Richard HI."
Representative S. S. COX has gone west
on another lecturing tour. He will lecture in
Youngstown, O.. East Saginaw, Mich., and St.
Paul. On the Fourth of July he wilt orate in
Dakota, and before his return will visit the
Yellowstone Park.
Colokel R. Ricketts, who won fame' as a
battery Commander at Gettysburg, lives in
Pennsylvanla,and was a candidate for lieuten
ant Governor "of that State in 18S6. He still
preserves his military bearing, but rarely talks
of war except to intimate fliends. He has ex
tensive interests In the lumber trade.
Mahshall P. Wilder tells the following
story In his book, "The People I've Smiled
With." Because he has been a public man
and politician a great many years, Mr. Blaine
is supposed by some people to be very thick
skinned, but it is impossible to be with him a
little while without seeing that he is nothing of
the sort He is quite as sensitive as any other
gentleman, and any rude remark grates un
pleasantly upon him, even If it has no personal
application. Tho only time I ever heard him
speak of himself, was one day when he brought
me a caricature of myself which some one
aboard ship had drawn. ''There, Marshall,"
said he, "how do you like that?" "Great
Scott!" I exclaimed, making a face at the
picture, "does that loot like me?" "Well,"
said he, "that's exactly the question I ask my.
self when the illustrated papers caricature
me."
The Grentrst Hand at All.
From the New York Herald.3
The hand of j our best girl may rest passively
in yours, With the assurance that it is yours
until death or divorce; the hand of Time may
rest lightly and lovingly upon you: the hand of
the clock may point to the dinner hour: you
may be the handsomest man at a beauty show;
yon may be handy enough with your revolver
to get the drop on a train robber, but nothing
can equal the quiet ecstacy of a hand of four
aces when the jack pot Is large and Increasing.
IlotV Sparrows Mny be Utilized.
From the Louisville Conrier-Joarnal.
A Chicago man traps 300 English sparrows
in'a day, and as they are fat and healthy he
gets a good price for them at the restaurants.
It is said that the feathers of the sparrow make
a comfortable bed. It may be that Providence
has sent the sparrow to feed and warm the'
rapidly growing cities of America. "We may
all come to love this little Englishman some
day.
A Poor City for Monuments.
From the Chicago Tribune.!
Christopher Columbus is about to be hon
ored by a new and elegant fmonument in New
York City.
A proposition for.
fDesigu for a. ,
Pretty llnrd on College.
Front the Chicago Kews. j
It is estimated that 40 pet1 cent of the Mem
bers of the last two Congresses were college
men. This is a pretty bard blow on those insti
tutions, but perhaps they Will be able to
weather It
- -
finnans' New Railroad.
From the Chicago Tribune.:
A new railway in Kansas bears the name ot
the Hutchinson. Oklahoma and Gulf, and will
doubtless become known to fame as the Route
H. 0. G. or Die.
Poor Chicago.
From the St. Louis Kepubllc
There are at least ball a million people for
whom sheol has no terror. They livo in Chica
go and summer has come.
FOOTGEAR OP AATI0NS.
IK tho ninth and tenth centuries the com
mon form of shoe In Europe was tne wooden
shoe.
The Egyptians had shoes or sandals made
orddlnarlly o( leather, bat sometimes ot palm
leaves or papyrus.
Chinese persons of rank wear boots with
thick soles and leg Of fine cloth or silk that
reach halt-way up to the knee.
The Japanese in their houses Wear light
shoes or slippers, with woven soles, without
heels, Or else go in their stocking' eet,
Wooden shoes, or sabofa, art worn now
among the peasants in many countries in Eu
rope. Their advantage is in their cheapness
and durability.
Amo.n'Q the Southern Indian, where no pro
tection is needed from the cold, a shoe is made
consisting simply of a sole of thick hide bound
on the feet by thongs.
These art a variety of boots and shoes used
in China. The common shoe is made of thick,
heavy felt, with a still thicker sole made of
woven straw or layers of felt
In the sixteenth century boots were gener
ally wotn In England and France and the boots
of the cavaliers were made with enormously
wide tops that Mere rolled or folded oyer.
i
DEATHS OF A DAY.
John H, Ueedt
Special Telegram to The Dispatch.
Tarentoh. June 22. -John B.
Beea,
one of
Tarcn turn's oldest citizens, died this morning-.
JIUIU IUC SUCVil V BU BJPyVMCVUV ftbCWHO rCCclVd
tfunevt
THE T0PI0AL f ALKEU.
Justice ' to fa Toivnsmnn Horace Phillip'
Need of Mascots Bits About the Ball
Gntne.
A nfpoORAratOAL error in this column1
yesterday gave a very ungracious color to some
remarks about Mr. Hemmlck, the sow Consul
at Geneva. The concluding paragraph should
have read: ''Altogether Pittsburg can heartily
congratulate Mr. Hemmlck and herself at the'
tame time on being to well represented in the
beautiful Swiss city by the lake."
The word "heartily," bowever,was Ingeniously
changed into ".hardly," and thus a fine piece ot
sarcasm made nonsense ot the friendly words
preceding It
"
If the Hustling Horace Phillips does not
hire .half a hundred mascots, consult a witch or
two, or in some other legitimate way compel
Dame Fortune to smile, the Allegheny Base
ball Club might as well disband at once.
Look at that first game yesterday. With its
12 Innings full of admirable playing by all the
Allegheny team, and its conclusion In a sick
ening derea: of 1 to 0. It is evident that the
Doys, in the very penitential garments Of gray,
are, in the language of what the easslcty jour
nals would call the ''trottolr" decidedly "'down
on their luck."
Anybody possessing a healthy mascot, sound
in wind and limb, and warranted not to reverse
its action under any circumstances, is requested
to send it, carriage paid, to Horace Phillips.
This request is official,-ot course.
By the way, are the privileges of selling pea
nuts, bad' cigars and chewing gum, of all
things in the world. Oh the grand stand so valu
able to the Allegheny club that they cannot be
dispensed with in the evident interest of
msthetlclsm and true baseball?
At such a moment for Instance, as at tne end
of that inning in which the Allegbenies bad
the bases filled and looked like winning the
game with runs to spare, what could jar upon
one's feelings more than a raspy boy's voice
yelling In one' ear, "MUckaranChewingGuml"
It would not have ever occurred to one to
look for gum chewers, masculine at that in the
benches of a ball field. All the same, no less
than four young men within speaking distance
of the writer had their jaws partially glued
together with gum. This fact lent a glutinous
obscurity to their enthusiastic yells.
V
One of the delights in reaching Recreation
Park is that the shortest way is via the Union
line of combination dust carts and streec cars.
These cars are not crowded on a fino afternoon
when the Allegbenies are playing at home. Not
at all. Crowded is not the word. Passengers
fill all the seats, lie under the seats, hang on. to
the roof, sit on the roof, stand wherever they
can on the platforms and depend trom the
same In a very precarious fashion. The car I
was packed in yesterday carried 70 people, less
2. The conductor's register showed these
figures. Capacity of the car, probably 24
HEPBCRX JOuitS.
AN INGENIOUS DEVICE.
The New Blennl to Warn Tralm of Another
One In Advnncc.
Special Telegram to The Dispatch.
New York, June 22. Frank Robinson,
Superintendent of Motive Power of the Maine
Central, at Bangor, has invented a railway
signal to warn one train when another has just
preceded it. Mr. Robinson's signal, one of the
ordinary kind, is set by the passing of a train,
the wheels operating upon a strong spring
placed alongside the rail, and after a given
number of minutes (the time can be regulated
to suit) It Is returned to its original position by
torce of gravity. This force is obtained by
means of two Iron bulbs or globes, one of which
is tilled with alcohol. Connected by tubes and
unerenly balanced upon a horizontal shaft.
The action of the spring In setting the signal
brings the globe tilled with alcohol to such a
position above the empty globe, which is the
smaller ot the two, that the liquid begins to run
Ihto the Utter tbrrogh a small tube, the air
thus displaced passing to the upper globe by
means of a large tube. When the smaller globe
has received the greater part of the alcohol it
swings by its own weight and required momen
tum around the axis to a point above the larger
globe, thus turning the signals, when the alco
hol quickly runs back to its original receptacle
through the large tube and the two spheres re
sume their original position, i
Itloilier Earih'a Tncuum.
From the Chicago Inter-Ocean. I
The amount ot coal gas and oil that is now
being drained from the interior will produce
something of a vacuum in Mother Earth sooner
or later. The present supply of gas is enor
mous. Statistics for oil show that in 18
Pennsylvania produced 16,491,033 barrels: Ohio,
10,010,!s68 barrels: West Virginia, lly,3 bar
rels; California, 704,619 barrels and other
States 20,000 barrels. Just how long such a
draft can be made and every year increased,
and the walls bold, no one can ear. It is pos
sible that the supply will be equal to the de
mand, and there will be no collapse. Science
knows but little of the machinery down toward
China.
THE NOBLE RED MAN.
The Indian agencies are 61 In number.
Numbee of houses occupied by Indians, 21,
232. Estimated number of Indians in Alaska,
30,000. '
Number of Indians Bring on and cultivat
ing Ian is is ",612.
THE total Indian population of the United
States is 247,701.
NOhber of Indian church members in the
United States is 2S.663.
NUMBER of Indians in the United States who
can read Engl sli is but 23,493.
NUMbEE of Indians' in the United States,
who wear citizens' dress is 81.621.
Number of citizens in the United Slates who
can read In dian languace is 71,100.
These are ten Indian training schools lo
cated in different parts of the Union.
EllYME AND KEAS0N.
"Busted, all my money s cone, ,
Shall t pafrn my dtatnond ring?
Uo.li binds me to m Jack,
And 1 will do no such a thing.
But sortie" money I most raise,
Ob, for a friend On whom to call,
Something, something must be pawned, "
So she put up bar parasol.
Smart? WhatiSthegreatestgastrononilcal
feat ever performed In the world?
lluinbley-Eatlng a young wife's mince pie.
SmirtT-No.
Uumbley Well. I give It up.
Smarty Eton, England.
Wated-A female stenographer; call or
tend photograph.
BunOTJNDT That was a frighttul accident
that happened to the man who writes the funny
column in the Prohibition Journal. ,
JJaddy-Whatwasit?
Burgundy Why, he sat down on his MS.
Daddy-Well.
Durguntlr-And the sharp points gave him a
frightful Jg.
Daddy 1 on idiot, that won't hurt him; he's
always more or less jagacd.
Gossip Did you know MiS3 Rapid sued
llarrr Bnullulk for libel because he said the was
a lemon?
Another OoSsIp-Jts that so? When doerthe case
come np?
UoMip-H was called yesterday and h was e
quitted,
Another Gossip-On whose evidence?
Uosslp-bdUie dude's, who testified that tliii
Eapld was entertaining.
When strawberries first to market come,
One dollar a quart we pay.
And nf course the laboring man don't buy,
For the price Is out of his way.
But just as soon as the prices fall,
And the berries brim in saucer and cup,
The laboring man's wire will first miki the Start
To again put the itaWbirf y up.
Mr. Hayseed (to city chap)-I believe I am
going to hare. a great deal ol trpubla with my
corn this year,
City Chap-Well, why don't you go to a chirop
odist? I had a letter from my iflve,
It came acroii the deal) blue tea,
And It does prove beyond a doubt.
That slta is thinking still of me.
She says "My love is growing more,
I'll always beyourlovlng Dinah,
And I will write again to you,
The moment I reachDresden, China."
bXXSS&l, ,
OUR BROKEN TOYS. '
The Lrgend of the Tin Soldier Tho Iilmba
of Lost Toys A Good OlilChrUllan Cut
loih The flayibtti of the t'oor.
Hans Christian Andersen tells lis that when
his little tin soldier, who loved that airy, fairy
ballerina (who was only cut out of paper) was
tossed into the fire by a careless boy, be slowly
melted, and melted, and melted away, until
nothing was left of him but a scrap of metal
which the housemaid swept away next morning
molten into the form ot a tiny heart. Not ail
the broken toys that annually go where
do they go, one would like to knowT
can boast of having made such a ro
mantic end as that. Nevertheless, they have
all an interest ana a pathos of their
own, not only on account of their nature and
life-biStory, but also by reason of the mystery
which invariably surrounds their ultimate des
tiny. For, as we asked before, where do they
got The Passing of Arthur himself Is Hot
more mysterious than the Passing of Punchi
nello when his cap Is off.'bls Dells broken, his
finery stripped from his wooden carcass, and
his very spinal curvature his priJoand boast
has been flattened by the bullets of outrageous
fortune into the semblance of an orthopaedic
backbone. The admirable scene painter who
executed the brilliant "Hall of Tois" in tne
last pantomime at Old Drury might, had be
been given the chance,'have painted a pendant
to mat pretty picture, abtl called It the Lliuco
of Lost Toys. The travelers to that bourne
from which no traveler returns (txcept occa
sionally as a special favor to the Society for
Psychical tlesearch) are not more myMerioua
In their booking arrangements than are the in
habitants of the toy box. What becomes of
our old playthings? They are as lost to us s
most of our old playfellows. Tbo latter one
does meet sometimes in after years. The little
puny boy, one who used to lag In sudh lordly
style at school, turns up occasionally in after
years, a strapping fellow, full of strange
oaths and bearded like the pard, a good six
niches taller than oneself, and often a bril
liantly successful man when hU senior has long
sirfce concluded that destiny has hot dealt him
the elder trumps in the game of life.
Where Do Thex Go?
But our toys return no more. Does any cynic
assert that it does not matter? If so. be is as
stupid iu this connection, as cynics habitually
are. If, instead of gradually disappearing
nobody knows as we outgrow each of them in
succession, our own toys, our very own, would
only reappear when we are well on the way to
second childhood, it is more than possible that
they wonld bring us back somethingof our own
childhood, besides themselves, along with
them. The unsuccessful General, tha naval
officer Who has managed to sink an Ironclad
and half a million of public money with it, the
unsuccessful gentleman farmer, would possl-
bly find surcease of unpleasant recollections if
tbey could only drill their old lead soldier, or
sail their old toy boats, or arrancre the Swiss
fjrmjard with the impossible trees and the
little wooden pens full of sheep grazing con
tentedly on the pasture of the nursery flour.
And there must be manr a wife and mother who
would not refuse to be comforted for some of
the cruellest of the disillusions of life if she
could onl) clasp Dolly to her heart once more,
as she Used to do. and uour ber troubles into
the sympathetic ear of that faithful companion
and friend.
All these, alas t have long disappeared into
the Limbo of Lost Toys. Where can that be?
There are many mysterious disappearances in
lite besides those which the metropolitan police
magistrates refer to "the usual courtesy of the
Press' to give them publicity. It has been
confidently asserted that no man has ever seen
a dead donkey. The deathbed nf wild bird is
usually a mystery even to those who most
closely watch their habits. Most mysterious of
all mysterious disappearances (except that of
pins) is that of elephants, for It is a common
place observation among hunters of big game
that it is Only very rarely that the sportsman
beholds the bleached bones of the mighty beast,
which could not after all well escape being
seen it one came in tneir way. utit wuere is
the A villon of our broken toys? The dust con
tractor's men could, and if they would, proba
bly tbrow some light upon the subject; but
dustmen are not, as a rule, given to the publi
cation of fanciful reflections in connection with
their calling.
Besides, not every discarded toy Is reckoned
to have sunk so low as to be submitted to the
supreme indigulty of the dustbin. Sometimes
they find their way into the wards of children's
hospitals, and certainly the last state of such
is better than the first, for they comfort the
weary hours of the suffering little ones, who
never before bad any better nursery than the
gutter or the railway arch, or any plaything
save an oyster shell or acabbage stalk. In some
countries, nocauiy in x ranee, tuey oiten place
a dead child's favorite toys upon the little
grave, which is, Indeed, a good old Christian
cutom. if we may believe the silent testimony
of the catacombs, where the toys of forgotten
children in old Home have been found in num
bers. Specimens even of the toys of ancient
E'ypt may be seen, gathered from similar
sources, in some of the museums of Europe.
Tots of the Poor.
The toys of the poor have no great mystery
abont them.e ither because there are.as was said
juit now, none of them, or because they are, by
reason of their scarcity and consequent value
lu the eyes of theowners, played with until they
are played out and drop to pieces of their owu
accord. But how about the more solid and
costly playthingsof Master find Miss? These,
no doubt, frequently become the natural per
qulslteaof servants.aud are by them transferred
to their own small relations. There is some
thing sad about that. An aristocratic doll, tor
instance, by birth probablyaParlsienne, accus
tomed to the refined social atmosphere of the
nursery in a gentleman's bouse, must be keenly
sensitive to the change of proprietorship when
she is banded over to Nurse's little Sister. It
is all very well to argue that the heyday
of her youth and beiuty is over.
Such reasoning only betrays a crais
ignorance of the mental habit of the sex. A
lady, as everybody knows, is never old or ugly.
True, she may be a broken toy in the strictest
sense of the terra. Gladys or Ethel may have
smashed her aristocratic hose and emptied her
elegant person of sawdust over the heads of
brothers and sister", but it is not to be sup-
fmsed for an instant that she Is any the more
ikely for that to accept with resignation
her position as the property of Polly
or amy. rye snouia not, inaeea, De
in the least surprised to hear, that
patrician dulls which are the victims of
such a WOful degringolade have a Way of their
Own of letting their new ilebelan proprietors
know tho difference between tho Classes and
the Masses. With the lower animals tors as
well ai "alive," it is different. The "high
mettled racer" accepts the shafts of the erowler
and even the knacker's final blow with patient
submission, and no dobut the wooden steed,
who is minus ills mane and similarly curtailed
at the other end, is equally philosophical In
analogous circumstances. There impatience,
if not dignltv, in his appearance as he is
dragged through the gutter at the heels of
the "little vulgar boy."
Whither, however, the little vulgar boy even
tually drags blra remains a mystery. One is,
perforce, compelled to take refuge in that
theorv of a Limbo of Lost Toys, where Noah
and his sons and his sons' wives recorer, per
haps, the scattered members of their remarka
ble zoological collection, and where the inquis
itive little fingers are never at work with a toy
as they always were in the nursery to "find
out what it's got inside." But certainly no
human eye has ever seen that lait resting
place of our broken loss. London Globe.
Tliet Had Brtter Chain It Down.
From the New York Tclegram.3
Jay Gould is going "take in." the Paris exhi
bition. Judging from the way In which he
usually takes in everything he touches there
won't be much left of the Eiffel Toner after he
gets through With It
The Sensible Thing to Do.
Vrotn the Philadelphia Inquirer,
It Is the season to wear a cabbage leaf in your
bat. If fashion were-guided by cemmon sense
it would be the season to wear the cabbage leaf
and leave tne hat at home.
Pnnklonnbte Freckles.
From the Philadelphia Press.!
Freckles of large Size and old gold hue are
tbe proper thing this year. Tho old-fashioned
tan aud sunburn are no longer popular.
THE INTELLECTUAL LVFAKT.
Harper's young People,!
The youngster is realty a wonderful lad)
Tho fact Is most easy to lee.
Hi knows "Pepsy-WOjiiey'S" the name Of his
Old,
That his hone Is a woolly 'aee'gee."
He knows thtt a trail! Is a big "Choo-Choo car,"
A "Dlng-doug," "Puff-puff, ' a ,Koooos'
He knds that a rabbit, When squeezed, will cry
"Alar!"
That a cofr'i nothing less than a "ildb-o-o."
Be Knows that a nanny-goat's naught bat a
Na-a-ah,"
That duck'ia ridiculous 'Qusckt"
He knows that a lambkin says nothing but
"Ua-a-ah,"
That a donkey's best known as a "JLtak.'
There's hardly a 'creature that's living to-day,
Twist tw inty and sixty years old,
That kuows all these thln--tfiat b,.I miy My,
He doesn't unless he's been told,
QQSSIP OP A GREAT 0ITT.
Equal to the Emergency.
CKXW YORK BtntXAtr SriCIALS.3
New Yobs, June 22. Some days ago a prac
tical Jokersent Invitations to 60 persona in Nor
watk. Conn., to attend the Wedding of James
Gordon, in Bridgeport, this evening. This ar
ternonn three wagon loads ot wedding guests
alighted at Mr. Gordon's door. Now Mr. Gor
don was not even engaged, and it took consid
erable time to explain to him the job which
bad been put up on htm and his Norwalk
lriends. As be grasped tbe situation, nowever,
he excused himself from bis surprise party. He
b timed off to the house ot Miss Lizzie Emmons
and asked her to become his bride in ten min
utes. Tbe proposal was so sudden that it al
most took her breath away, but she accepted
and only begged Tor a half hour's time in Which
to adorn herself in a suitable wedding attire,
Mr, Gordon then rushed back to inform his
guests of bis good luck. An Impromptu com
mittee Started for refreshments, music and a
minister. They came back presently with a
caterer and an orchestra, but no minister. After
considerable delay, a Justice of the peace, who
was with the party, volunteered to perform the
ceremony. The bride was ready in less time
than she asked fori and the knot was tied.
After an hour's dancing the guests started
back for Norwalk and tbe bridal pair went on
their wedding tour. '
Snlllvnn' Shoea On Exhibition.
The shoes which John Ik Sullivan will wear
in his fight with Kilrain, have hung from a
small liberty pole before tbe store of a down
town shoe dealer all day. On top of the pole is
a little American eagle and a red, white and
blue streamer. A crowd stood around tbe pole
and stared at the soles of the shoes all this
afternoon.
OfTfor Europe.
The P.ev. Dr. John HalL Mrs. Hall and
Chevalier DeTavera, Austrian Minister at
Washington, sailed for Europe to-day.
Clips Players Kcilocpd to Beggary.
At tbe close of the recent chess tournament,
many of the unsuccessful contestants were al
most penniless. They bad expected the mana
ging committee to pay their living expenses
here and their way home, out of the receipts
of the tournament, but tbe receipts were so
small that almost notbiug remained tor this
purpose after the prizes were paid. Several
ex-champion chess players were therefore
obliged to beg money with which to pay their
way home. Tanbenhans sailed for Havre in the
steerage with a few dollars, which he had
begged and borrowed. G.H.D.Gossip,tbe cham
pion chess player of Australia, has been unable
up to this afternoon to get 123 with which to
buy a steerage ticket to London, He thinks
that his rriends In England will pay his passage
back to Australia if be can only get over there.
Opposed'to Cbenp Fnneratf.
It Is war to the knife just now between tbe
Brooklyti undertakers and the United States
Funeral Directing Company. A short time ago
Liveryman Johnson Was boycotted by the" un
dertakers because ha furnished carriages for
the company's funerals. The company met
this antagonistic measure by guaranteeing liv
erymen whom it patronized as large profits
from its trade as were yielded to them by the
undertakers' trade. Now the undertakers
threaten to boycott all firms which engrave the
company's coffin plates. Beveral firms have,
therefore, refnsed to do the company's work.
Should the boycott be continued, the company
Will have to get its plates engraved out of town,
Tbe cause of the trouble Is tbe undertakers'
opposition to the company's policy of lowering
funeral expenses.
Tbe Fitch Case Postponed.
The verdict of the jury in tbe divorce case of
Fitch against Fitch, when opened in Court,
proved to be merely an announcement that,
being Unable to agree at 11:30 o'clock, the jury
nad concluded to give it Up and go home. Only
Colonel Ingersoll, Mr. Dougherty and Mr.
Fitch were in court. Mr. Fitch seemed cheer
ful until he learned that the jury bad stood 10
to 2 in favor of Mrs. Fitch. Then he looked
sad. The case was set down for retrial at tbe
October term. Mrs. Fitch's suit against her
husband for separation and alimony is on the
calendar for the same term.
A OAT'S LONG FAST.
The Ahlmal Taken Front the Wreck Alive
After Three Werka.
tttLoyt a stArr roRttisi'oNliKrt.l
JottKSTOwTf. June i&'-That a cat hath nine
HVeS Is a proverb as ancient as the hills, and its
truth was verified to-day. Tbe workmen un
earthed a live cat in tbe debris near tbe Balti
more and Ohio Station this afternoon. Itsbody
was reduced to a shadow, but the animal was
still kicking. Its neck was not any thicker
than that nf an ordinary bottle.
The animal was taken to tbe Bed Cross Hos
pital where they are feeding it on bread and
milk. Isbael.
Having: n Hnrd Time.
From the Cincinnati Commercial Gazette.:
According to all accounts Hon. Mr. Mnldoofi
19 having about as pleasant a time in training
Ron. JOhnL. Sul'lfan as the animal trainer
would have with a bear with a sore head.
Sign of the Times.
From the Chieajro Mews.
The toy pistols in the show windows and the
long rows' of little white coffins In tbe under
takers' shops indicate that the Fourtn of July
is near at hand.
A IllriV-oin Ileptlle.
from the Chlcato Tribune, t
A man in Waukeenab, Fla.. has killed 600
alligators this season. The alligator is a hideous
reptile. Let nobody shed any crocodile tears
over his remains.
TKI-STATE TRIFLES.
Harbisbtjro isa queer place to find a Texas
horned toad, yet Frank Toner found one on
tbe river bank the over day.
It has been a noticeable fact that of the
many bald old gentlemen who frequent a
restaurant on Chestnut street, Philadelphia,
there 1a one who Is never troubled with flies,
although the others are worried into a perspira
tion keeping tbe pesky things away. He ex
plained the other day that he bathed his scalp
with quassia water.
Box tortoises have become scarce in Chester
county, Pennsylvania, It is thought the mow
ing maohines have exterminated therm
A Clsartield, Pa., tramp who had stolen
art umbrella was caught in the act of smashing
tbo handsome handle to get tbe gold knob off.
A-WAOOISH Prohibitionist of Philadelphia
who lost a watch 6b the election paid bi3 bet
with a Waterbury. It should have beea a
Waterburied.
HfltfSfewiTES everywhere are" curious to find
out What is wrong with tbe pea crop this year.
They all seem to cook bard.
Roiie men have queer appetite?, ftgfe Is a
Lehigh county, Penturlvanla, man who eats
the ordinary red earthworms He has repeat
edly eaten them In lots of 25 on a wager, with
isemiflglya great i relish as if he was eating
tubes of macaroni.
David samel!, or Salisbury, near Allen
town, marked a cornstalk a day or two since to
see how fast it grew, and found that it gained
4 Inches in 33K hours.
Ht r..
SASftrtl Slimr, of West Chester, Pa., in
strolling through East Bradford Came on a
tnottur 'possum and ten little ones. He
caught the whole family, and will try to tarn
them.
A HA&RISBT7BQ, Pa., voter who invariably
scratches his ticket from force of ' habit
Scratched as uaal on Tuesday and made his
ticket worthless.
A Methodist church, near Joanna Furnace,
Berks county, Pa was struck with a lightning
bolt which l described as "a ball ol fire as
large ai a spittoon."
A .fsntmvrf fuberman, of Columoiana
county, Ohio, says that artistic angling outfits
are nothing more than downright tomfoolery
and that he can land all the nth ho wants with
a bent pin. And he does,
AnAfiSithwhohad a spite against Henry
ftambl, ot Preston county, West Virginia, dis
figured him terribly by cutting his ehetk While
snaring nun tne otntr aay.
CURIOUS CONDEJSATI0B8L ',
Nearly all the girls of Treemont, Mich.,
play ball.
A woman and her husband are master
and engineer respectively of a trading steamer
on tbe Columbia rlter, Washington.
A private soldier says that desertions
from tbe army are largely clue to the tyranny
of the younzer officers and the drunkenness of
the older ones.
As Will Durocher, oCEscanaba, Mich.,
was eating his supper a few nights ago a stroke
of lightning violently removed his shoes and
trousers, leaving him badly burned and
shocked.
A citizen of Virginia is seeking to have
tbe sulphur sprinirs of that State indited
as nuisances injurious to health. He has
lived near one for three years, and be savs
that strawberries and dead dpgs now smell
alike to hint.
In the Dutch portion of Borneo the
natives used to adorn their huts with human
heads, and they were ot particular whosa
head it was. Over 4000 of them have bad to bo
killed id order to pnt a stop to this practice,
which is now absolute.
There Is a larger proportion of the boys
and girls if New Jersey than of any other State
in the Union who go to Sundav school. It ap
pears by statistirs recently taken that there are
just about 280,000 children in the L997 Sunday'
schools of New Jersey.
The old Planters' House in St, Louis,
which gained hi-tnncal Interest from allusions
in Dickens' '-American Notes." and from
whose front balcony Andrew Johnson made on 9
of the opeeche-i that are Said to haVe led to his
impeachment, Is to be torn ilorrn.
A Pennsylvania editor has discovered
several Centuries late that everything in nature1
is playful. He says: "Tne lightning plays, tbo
wind whistles, the thunder rolls the snow flies,
the waves leap and the fields smile. Even the
trees shoot and the rivers and mreams run,"
News comes irom Toungu, Burmah,
that Koh Pal Sab, a timber merchant there.
has founded a new religion, which Is described
as a sort of mixture of Buddhism aud Christi
anity. The disciples who number several
thousands, keep th Christian Sunday and ab
stain from strong drink.
A cat In Falkirk, Scotland, is bringing
Up a brood of chickens. But the prize cat is to
be found in the hamlet of Trinity Gask. Perth
shire. Scotland. It is seriously related of her,
that, having been deprived of her kittens, sba
caught a nioue, which be adopted, and is now
mothering With great tenderness
For the convenience of those wishing to
punch two big turtles that are displayed in front
of a store in Punxsatawney, Pa., tbe owners
have placed some large sticks beside it. It an
noyed them greatly to See tbe expression of
pain on a man's face who Stopped there to looli
at the turtles and could not find a stick to prod
them with. ,
Florida's topographical appearance Is
exactly like that of a pistol. The PenaeoIa end
Of the State would represent the muzzle. Ap
palachicola the trigger. Fernandina the ham
mer and all South Flohdi the handle of tho
eapiin. Annexation to Alabama west of tha
Chattahoochee river wonld cut off the muzzle
and a good part of the barrel.
It is reported at Beidsville, Ga., that
last week a man m Tattnall county, while dip
ping turpentine, was struck abont the corner
of hii niiutb by a large rattlesnake. He seized
thereptil and was struck on the arm. Ha
then tried to tbrow the snake from him, and
was aain struck on the thigh. It is said he
died before reaching ahoue.
A "Guide to the Churches of London"
shows that thenumber of metropolitan churches
have increased between 1883 and lSb9from 923
to 1,018. Altar vestments are now the rule in
59 churches as against 37 in 1E83. altar lights la
119 as against 64 in 1S1S3, and the "eastward
position" in 890 as against Sol in 1683. In tbe
same period the number of churches in which,
the communion n celebnted in the evening has
decreased from 2X1 to 27i
An eccentric old gentleman who re
cently died in Tyler, Tex., left a sum of money
to be divided among persons now livinz lu tha
South whose birth was coincident with bis ontn
May 9, 1S35. If every person who Is entitled
to a share puts in a claim there will not ba
mnch for each one. There are in the United
States at least 40O.U0O persons who wer burn in
the United States in the year 1835, and of ttosd
the number In the Southern States wouM be
about 150,100. Assuming that the 9th of May
of that year was au average one for births
there are now living in the United States LlOft
persons who were born on that day, and 4CO of
them are residents of the South. ' .
It appears that wood pavements have
met with greater success in some ot tbe coun
tries of Europe than in our own, tbe reason as
signed for this being tbe fact of their having a
foundation of concrete to rest upon in tbe for
mer, at tbe same time receiving more attention
therein the way of maintenance tban here.
Owing to its hardness aud resinous qmlity,
American yellow plne.lt is said, has become
tbe favorite wood for Ibis purpose In Berlin
and Hamburg, ami an official report says that
Frederick's brlge, Berlin, which was paved m
the spring or 1ST9 with the wood in question, is
still In good condition, while the approaches,
paved with granite blocks, have twice since re
quired repaying.
A Boston paper tells of an old burying
ground in a largo southern New Hampshire
town there is an interesting group or seveu
tombstones. Each of six of them mark3 a
little strip of earth where rests tbe remains of
one of the wives of one man, and the seventh
Is the gravestone of the B.ue Beard himself.
The epitaphs or the wives are short and simple
enougb, bnt tbe filth bears, underneath tha
name and record of tbe woman's birth and
death, these wurds: "The Peacemaker." Ona
can only speculate as to what the circum
stances were under Which she exercised her
benevolent art: but no tlnulit she had to be a
peacemaker to enable her husband to get along
in any sort of romiort wi.h all bis deceased
wives' relations. But the epitaph on tbe hus
band's tombstone is a gem. It reads thus:
: best! wEAitTpiLoniiL T
CLIPPED BITS OF WIT.
"Wibble "What do you think of this idea
ofadoptlng the sunflower as the nttlonal fiowerf
Wabble-Pretty good Idea, 1 thlnt. It is typi
cal or quite a nnmerous class of Americans. It
makeS a big spread all summer and is seedy In tba
fall. Itrrs Hants hxyrtss.
Fenderson I don't like your friend
Brown. He is positively rude. He went so far
laat evening as to tell me 1 was a JacXasi. It was
entirely uncalled for.
Fojrtr-I agree with you, my by. It was entirely
superflil0Ui.''itm Transcript.
"Where the "Work Comes In. Minister's
Wife You haveht been oat or your study an
hour tills week. What Is tliemi'tcr
Minister Some oftbe congregation say my ser
mons are too lob;, and I've been trying to write
ithonone.-.Vtwror H'tfily.
What Kept Him.Irate Mamma Good
ness me! It's hairan boursinee I sent you around
to the store to get those things, and here you are
back without them.
Little Hlcfe- "It wis such a long time before my
turn came to be waited on that I forgot what it
was you wanted,"
Then why didn't you come home and Bud,
0UH"
"1 was afraid If I left I'd lose my tarn.'-iVrto
Tor li(V.
A Satisfactory Explanation. Distracted
Mother (at her daughter's weddlng-Oht Oht
(Mil What shall we dor The groom hasn't come,
the guests are beginning to giggle, and my
daughter is In a faint.
Friend of the family "Calm yourself, madam.
I saw tbe groom only two hours ago, entering the
Great Dry Goods Emporium at the Corner. 11
Slid he had fbrkotted to get gloves.'
Distraetcd Mother (suddenly breaking Into
itsllssWUh, then It's all right. He's probably
waiting for his change. " Sea Xnrk H testy.
TOSE StISEBT.
Now it is that Sol's insistence, from a salu
tary dUtance, melts our linen aud apparel
toihet'rogetltoui pulp.
And we drench oar constitutions, with thesa
bibulous ablutions, till It seems, almost,
tile filter would be empted it a gulp.
BUt this mild Incineration, has its ample compen
litlon, for amidst the bltrulitlou, we to ar
deutly Implore,
We are spared that cry eternal, with lis tmphsiis
internal, from tbe man who shrinks and
shivers as he chatters Shut the door 1 1 1
PMlaUitphut Prist.
Onlv Ona Plnea fnf 'Ffini.-.Prnminent
Polltlcian-lhlve dons a good many favors for
you, and bow I'd like you to put a friend of mtna &
on your paper. , .
Ufeat'Kdltor-'n'ouldba do for a reporter? , f
"No.hebasn'tanylegs." 3&-
"TJm-mlght make an exchange editor,-p v
haps?" .
."Be couldn't read the newspapers. He's
Mind
"Poornnowl caahehear?" a.X'4
"Mo, deaf as a post lit Is a flaswrtter,
though, aad he ha a lively Imagination. i& i
-Ooodl 1 win appoint him La4fc oorrt
sponaest.H-Acw lor nutty.
f.
f ti i mil mi i j.
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