tt :' -r iCHB PITTSBURG DISPATCH; SATUBDAYT JUNE- 15, 1889. 8jjt mgpafrli ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, 1S16. ' Yot, No. 12S.Entcre: at rittsburg Postoffice, 1,'OTcmbcrH, 1SS7, as second-class matter. Business Office 97 and 09 Fifth Avenue. News Booms and Publishing- House 75, 77 and 79 Diamond Street. iTfregc net ctrcnlatlon of the dally edi tion of The Dispatch for six month ending Jane 1. 1SS9, 27,824 Coplet per Imuc Average net circulation of tho Sunday edi tion of The Dispatch for Slay, 1SS0, 47,468 Copies per issne. TEEMS OF THE DISPATCH. rosTAGE fete in TnE united states. JHTLTDtsrATcn. One Year f S CO Daily Dispatch, Per Quarter 2 W Dah.t Dispatch, One Month 0 Daily Dispatch, including Sunday, one year. 10 00 Daily Dispatch, Including Sunday, per quarter. 50 Daily Dispatch, including Sunday, one month 90 fcuxDAY Dispatch, oneyear. ISO "Weekly DifPATcn, one year 13 The Daily Dispatch Is delivered by carriers at It cents per wecV, or including the gnnday edition, si 10 cents per veet. PITTSBURG. SATURDAY, JUKE 15, 1SS& TBAXSMITTED FEATURES. The deliberation which marked the actions of Governor Bearer in coming to the relief of Johnstown, appears to be re produced with some of its typical features in the action of the commission which he has instituted. Promptness is not so vital a necessity now as it was two weeks ago, and therefore we may take a philosophical in terest in observing this example of trans mitted qualities. It took the Governor the best part of a week to find out that there had been any catastrophe. Then, in view of the fact that others had been before him at Johnstown, he made a display over the fact that he had got supplies to Williamsport, which city Lad lost a good deal of lumber and 1)i per cent of the mortality at Johnstown. The second week was occupied in getting up his loan scheme, which, palpably unconstitu tional on its face, was rejected, as shown by a dispatch elsewhere, the moment it was presented to the man who is responsible for the State funds. Having got an acceptable substitute for the loan idea, the Governor organizes his commission to take charge of the relief work. The Pittsburg members of it were notified of their appointment yesterday, but the commission, we are informed, has de cided to put itself in motion on Monday next It is going to copy the Governor's plan of going to "Williamsport first, where the losses in comparison to those at Johns town are as a flea bite, and the Johnstown sufferers can rest in the hope that the com mission will reach that place three or four weeks after the date of the calamity. In the meantime Pittsburg can continue its work of supplying the stricken valley and getting the cold shoulder from the offi cial world for doing so. It is fortunate there was some one to take hold of the relief work ; i promptly, without waiting for red tape, 'consultations and visits, so that supplies were started.on the road to Johnstown be fore any one had reached the place from like outside world. DUE TO HAED PAH PRICES. The trade reports show an improvement in the iron and steel trade, and a growing confidence in the situation. This is accom panied by a larger railway demand for Bteel rails and iron; but it is a comfortable feature of the situation that the iron trade is now independent of the railway demand, which, oy its increase or diminution, used to make .jthe difference between activity and de pression. There has been such an expansion in the uses of "iron that for the last two years, while railroad construction has been materially curtailed, the output of iron has teen very large. It is notable that this growth in the application of iron to new uses has been in an era of low prices. To gether with the consideration that these hard pan prices have preserved the iron trade from anything like panic, the way in ; which they have also encouraged the devel opment of new fields for that staple ought to he full of instruction for the iron interest. THE STRONGEST QUALIFICATION. . -The selection ot Calvin S. Brice, for Chairman of the National Democratic Com mittee, after the large number of other names that were suggested for it, proves that the qualification which is regarded as .most esseutial in practical politics on the V 'Eepublican side, holds an equal supremacy lamong the Democrats. The Democratic choice in this case is evidently based upon the hope that Mr. Brice's experience will make him less liable to chase rainbows, hut will place at the disposition of the Demo cratic managers the pot of gold which the fable of nursery lore locates at the end of 'the rainbow. In other words, Mr. Brice's qualification to take charge of the Democratic campaign, consists in his ability to draw a very large v check, gained by a career of railroacfmanip nlation and stock watering. For a party which professes antagonism to corporate abuses and the prominence of egregious wealth in politics, the Democratic organiza tion shows a rather singular affection for men of the Scott, Brice and Tilden stamp. Big bank accounts and the power to secure them through corporate jugglery are about as potent in one political organization as another. EXECUTIONS MUST BE PUBLIC, i New York State is having considerable trouble over the enforcement of its electric execntion law, and before a murderer is ex ecuted under its provisions its constitutional ity is to be examined in the courts. The law seems to have been drawn very care ij lessly. There is no doubt about the nncon ' stitutionality of the section of the law which says: "No account of any details of any such execution beyond the statement of the fact that such convict was on the day in question duly executed according to law at the prison shall be published in any news paper." This point is not the one on which the appeal on behalf of Eemmlcr, a convicted murderer has been made. Eemmler's coun sel hope to save their client on the plea that "death by electricity is one of those punish ments prohibited by the Constitution as un usual and cruel. All the same the clause making or aimed to make executions by elec i .tricky secret is so ridiculous, and, if a possi---'bility of its enforcement existed, so harmful ithat it will surely be excised from the law ' afat'the next meeting of the Legislature. fg)Il is a fact, doubtless, that the printing of ,the;nauseons details of an execution serves ; no'good. purpose; but infinitely more harm wonlot'bedoae by the exclusion of all re- ports of the conclusion of the law's decree. The newspapers have the authority of the Bill of Bights to sustain them in publish ing accounts of capital executions, and there is really nothing to hinder them in so doing. In the case of the application or a new sys tem of killing it is especially manifest that a full account of the process is demanded by the public and is rightly due them. If Kemmler is finally, executed by elec tricity it may be expected with confidence that every newspaper in the country will publish a fnll accountof it. The Legislature cannot successfully defy the Constitution of the Government or the constitutional prin ciples of the American press. THE OBNOXIOUS STOBE OBDEB. The "store-order" system of paying miners has always been a thorn in the side of that class of labor. It is not surprising that they back up the strike on which they tnter to-day by a strong appeal to the pub lic, and that some of the employers who do not unite trading with mining are ready to join them. As in speaking of the efforts or the Amalgamated Association to have the Eastern and Western wages made the same, TnE DisrATCH in respect to the agitation against the "store-order" system must recog nize that the miners' move is entitled to the consideration which is due to an effort to secure equal terms for all employers. The man who pays in cash for his work is cer tainly at a disadvantage compared with him who pays in clothes or groceries on which there is a greater or less profit. Of course the public will hear of the "liberty ot contract,"and all that upon the other side but whether considered from the standpoint of labor organizations, or of the interests of those operators who do not run stores the strike is one which cannot be re garded as improvident or without cause. The mining industry has been reduced to far from its old-time prosperous condition, both for operators and hands. It is made tolerably plain that store-order payments have played an efficient part in this by enabling the store owner to sell coal at a rate to shut out the operator who paid cash for mining; they, in turn, compelling the latter to ask reduction after reduction of wages. The strike will by no means solve the dif ficulty of dullness in the market; but if the "store order" is abolished, and capital in different hands can operate on equal terms, it is clear at least that one prolific cause of bitter and perennial dispute will be re moved. INDOMITABLE STANLEY. The receipt of news from Henry M. Stan ley indicates that the intrepid explorer has again confounded the people who make a practice of killing him whenever he disap pears into the wilds of Africa, by prac tically completing another march across that great and comparatively unexplored continent The news comes from Usiri, a town to the southeast of Lake Victoria, and 350 miles from the eastern coast of Africa. The details which are published, concern ing his arrival there, are so confused and contradictory that they would throw doubt upon the authenticity of the report, if they were not accompanied by a letter from the explorer himself to Sir Francis Vinton. This makes it practically certain that Stan ley has come within reach of the eastern coast of Africa, and is bringing Emin Pasha with him away from the equatorial Province. Thus Stanley will victoriously accom plish the work which he set out upon some years ago of relieving the heroic Governor of Equatorial Africa. The abandonment of the workof civilization at thehead waters of the Nile, is to be regretted, but it is certain ly better so han to leave the pioneer whose work has been so self-sacrificing and suc cessful, to the fate of Gordon. The success which Stanley has secured in the face of predictions and reports of failure, adds another to the list of his great achievements in African work. The work of civilization in Africa now seems to lie along the line of the Congo. If Stanley can complete his work by freeing that valley from the depredations of the slave traders, he will have accomplished a a life-time's task, which will be rivaled by few men in the history of civilization. BOBBING THE HOUSEHOLD. The public issues which are involved in an artificial enhancement of the price of sugar, are very well stated by the New York Evening Sun. That journal asserts that "high sugar means misery to every civilized race," and goes on to explain that high-priced sugar means more costly coSce, tea and other household beverages, higher priced cakes, more expensive desserts, pre serves, pies, and all such delicacies. These may be regarded as luxuries; but the delib erate cutting off of the luxuries of the com mon peoole for the benefit of a clique of speculators may very well take rank as a crime against the public interest. Our cotempprary which puts the case in this terse and lucid manner, says that pres ent indications are that "the present scarcity will continue with corresponding prices un til a new beet root crop gives the world a fresh supply." It is possible that the sup plv of raw sugars is somewhat diminished, but that is not the only, nor indeed the main, cause for the present high price of this household staple. The real cause is the combination ot the refiners which imposes a double or triple charge for refining the sugars that are used by the people of this country. They thus at once diminish the rewards which stimulate production of raw sugars and levy an unnecessary and unjust tax upon the consumers of refined sugars. It is a vital part of the problem that this illegal tax upon the consumers of the whole country is levied in defiance of the law. The decision of the New York Court against the sugar tax is conclusive upon this point. Ought not the public to find some method of protecting itself against illegal extortions of this sort more prompt in its operation than waiting until increased production rectifies the wrong? , AN OUTLAWED PLEDGE. The officials in charge of the Postoffice Department seem to be fully convinced that the President's assertion in his letter of ac ceptance, that "only the interests of the public service should suggest removals from office," is a barren ideality. Their opinion to that effect finds a concrete expression in their action on the appointment of a post master at Huntsville, Ala. The postoffice there was held by a lady who was appointed on the flth of last January. When it was re ported that she was to be removed in favor of a leading Republican politician, the peo ple of the town, both Bepublicans and Democrats, united in & petition to the Presi dent that she should be retained in office for the full term indicated by the date of her commission. This petition, which was in dorsed by the Eepublican newspaper of the town, set forth her efficiency and careful discharge of the duties of the office. The Postoffice Department, however, called for her resignation, first on the alleged grounds of unfitness to discharge the duties, and when she demanded specification of the de- tails, replied by removing her peremptorily. This is spoils politics, pure and simple, and may be taken to indicate the political prin ciple that campaign pledges are outlawed after election day. The ability of the American character to rise superior to storms and floods is illus trated by the fact that as the excitement over the Johnstown disaster subsides, Sena tor Quay is once more observed to have been serenely at work getting the important Pennsylvania offices at Washington. Is- the death of "William Semple, the community loses one of its representative business men. As a merchant he won sig nal success under such conditions as con clusively showed his ability. One of the first of our local business men to grasp to the full the value of advertising exten sively and always, Mr. Semple not only used printers' ink effectively in making1 his own large fortune, but taught others 'its vast importance. The quick apprehension which he showed in this particular was not less displayed in other respects. The mer cantile prosperity of Pittsburg, and more particularly yet of Allegheny, owes a great deal to the individual force and to the ex ample of "William Semple. The Society of Dunkards has prohibited the wearing of gold watches as productive of pride on the part of the wearer. This also contains the additional religious pur pose of inflicting discipline in patience and mortification on the Dunkards who have to wear Waterburys. Ik connection with the prominence which our own General Beaver has recently assumed, it is interesting to observe that the sentence of Captain George A. Armes, who made an assault upon the Gubernatorial nose in Washington, is that he is to be con fined within a 50-mile radius from the Dis trict of Columbia for the period of five years. A large sized army of office holders would be glad to receive the same sentence. Captain Armes' punishment will be due notification to the Governor that he can pre serve the integrity of his nose by remaining at a distance of 60 miles from the National Capital. Fbance pays a compliment to the United States by selecting the fourth of July as the date for unveiling the statue of Liberty at Paris. But what day the Monarchist party will select for pulling the statue down again when they get into power is yet an unsettled question. The new rules for representation in the Oil Exchanges seem to be based on the legitimate foundation of giving the largest exchanges the more votes. But when the size is fixed by dealings which may repre sent a considerable proportion of washed sales, the situation is ripe for the rumor that this is the first step in forcing "future" trading into that business. Well, it is doubtful whether the lambs will yield up their fleeces any more promptly to that form of speculation than to the present one. It is remarked by the Denver News that "Pay Templeton seems to be making a reputation." The inference might be that the gay actress can manufacture a reputa tion to replace the one she has lost. But it seems to be the same old reputation. Me. Dana reports from his Southern trip that all traces of the civil war have disappeared. He must have omitted to call upon the Southern Confederacy residing at Beauvoir, or to note the revivals of that de funct cause in the speeches of General Jubal Early and the editorials of the Atlanta Constitution, which speak about "Confeder ates who deserted their cause since the war has ended." The papers are now kept busy in pub lishing dispatches sho wine first that Hippo lyte was whipped and next that Legitime is the conqueror of Hayti. Cannot they get a reliable referee to go down and decide who is ahead? Me. John C. New writes to his paper, the Indianapolis Journal, and after askincr himself the question, "Do I like London?" replies in the affirmative, with the assertion that strangers generally likeLondonthe bet ter the longer they stay there. Mr. New might have added especially that those like it who are able to lay up from 517,000 to 525,000 a year by remaining in the huge metropolis. Palmer, of Illinois, has just undergone retirement from politics by means of Presi dental nomination from the brilliant but, as regards such nominations, unreliable Sun, of New York. A new idea in the line of drinking facil ities has just been started in Berlin, where for 5150 a man can obtain all the drinks he wants for a year, with monthly subscrip tions in proportion. If a place of that sort could obtain license in Pittsburg, some of our old drinkers would undertake to send it into bankruptcy before the year was up. Stanley has again defeated the corres pondents who persist in killing him every time he starts out to cross the Dark Con tinent. The experience of General Early and General Bosser, of the late Southern Con federacy, was very discouraging 25 years ago when they attacked General Sheridan. They have discreetly omitted to renew the attempt until Sheridan's death. It is much easier to beat a dead man than a live one of Sheridan's stamp. PfiOMLNENT PEOPLE. Sin Chables Russell's sister was the first Sister of Mercy in California. THE young king of Bervia is feeling very much nattered at the discovery of a plot to de throne him. Tub Duke of Portland's marriage removes the last really desirable English peer from the matrimonial market. Secretary Rusk has been visiting his Wisconsin neighbors for the first time since he was made a Cabinet Minister. Hobatio Gates Jones, of Philadelphia, wants the paper manufacturers of the countrv to celebrate thebl-centennlal of the erection ot the first paper mill on this continent in 1690. Miss Dallas Yobke had her wedding gown made by a woman who has dono most of her sewing since her childhood, and all her ward robe was prepared on an economical scale. As Duchess of Portland she will now not have to be so careful about her shopping bills. The will is published ot Auguste Maquet the co-laborer of Dumas, the elder, who died last year. He directs his executors to defend his dignity as a writer, and to show to the public what an immense share he had in the works of Dumas, who "never paid him either in friendship or in gratitude, and took to him self all the honor." Mrs. Henby B. Flan n eb, of Cleveland, has given to Marietta College, Ohio, a fine her barium of 15,000 specimens, gathered and ar ranged by herself and her late husband. The collection was made chiefly in the Ohio Val ley, Missouri, Georgia, Michigan and the Upper Mississippi region, and was enlarged by ex changes with botanists in all parts of the world. , " THE TOPICAL TALKER. The Newspapermen's 8burc--HoTvnnElltor Was Nearly Drowned-. Gossip of Several Sorts. Eveby newspaperman in the city, from editor-in-chief to the newest reporters, have known what it is to work double turn during the last two weeks. The consequence is that most of them are decidedly the worse for wear. Naturally those who were assigned to duty at Johnstown had the greatest hardships to undergo. I have not yet met a man with one exception to whom tfie experience in Johnstown has not done considerable damage. Most of the reporters in the devastated dis trict complain of acute dyspepsia or stomach disorders. "The diet of hard tack, salt beef.ham and such things, and the irregularity of meals in fact in the first few days after the flood the reporter who got a meal a day was considered lucky very naturally played havoc with diges tions. Almost every reporter in the field will have something m the way of physical distress by which to remember the first two weeks of June, 1SS9, for several years to come. But they earned a heap of glory, and most of them have, practical evidence in tljeir pocketbooks of their employers' appreciation. V The men who worked in the newspaper offices in Pittsburg did not taste somuch glory, but then they didn't acquire dyspepsia, rheu matism, or pneumonia, either. But they worked very hard 1 know they did in one office, and the appearauco of my friends in the other offices told the same story. So tired was a certain managing editor when be arrived homo a day or two after the birth of the greatest sensation Pittsburg has ever known, that lie almost drowned himself. Mind you, he did not attempt to commit suicide. He simply filled up the bath tub with moderately hot water and laid himself down in it, to soak out the tired feeling in his limbs and bring the joys of cleanliness to his epidermis. No sooner had he sighed one sigh as the languorous sense of Intense comfort crept oyer him, then his eyes closed. He slept As ho slept he slipped gradu ally down the sloping end of the tub. First his chin was under water, then his mouth, and at last bis nose disappeared. It was a dollar even whether he would wake and livo or sleep and drown. Happily the taste of water was unfamiliar to him. His aston ished palate sounded the alarm. His lungs seconded it weakly,-and spluttering and kick ing with excited life the editor arose from a watery grave, with vivid visions of the Johns town flood crowding upon his mind. , There has been somo remarkable speed shown in all sorts of work for tho relief of Johnstown. For instance, on Tuesday at noon, the Cham ber of Commerce Committee notified Mr. Hop per the lumber man, of this city, that he'could have the contract for delivering 25 carloads of lumber at Johnstown to -their order, if he would have the whole amount shipped and in order for transmission by Wednesday at noon. Although Mr, Hopper is no longer a young man he is half way between 60 and 701 think he took the contract, and working all through that night had the 2o cars loaded up as required by 11:30 on Wednesday morning. The gentleman who told me this said that the time made by Mr. Hopper, considering the dif ficulty in getting cars, was most remarkable, i An actor In New York writes to me to say that the story of the engagement of Miss Min nie Maddern to Mr. Harrison Grey Fiske is founded on solid facts. According to my in formant the courtship has principally occurred since Miss Maddern has been playing the lead ing character in "Featherbrain" at tho Madison Square Theater. But no public announcement has been made by either of the contracting parties of their approaching alliance for life. Miss Maddern is hardly likely to leave the stage if united to such a stalwart admirer and ally of the stage as the talented editor of the New York Dram atie Mirror. They will make a very remarkable couple. Miss Maddern is one of the greatest actresses we have, and it is pleasant to know that she is not going to throw herself away as so many of her sisters in the profession have done. MEDICINE BY CONTRACT. The Scheme of a Louisville Physician to In crease His Practice. LouisyrLLE. June 11 A unlquo contract, which furnished a lawsnit for Dr. B. F. Mc Cawley against A. Schammerhorn, a legal knot for 'Squire W. F. Miller, of the Wet Woods district an appeal for the defeated defendant and amusement for a number of physicians and attorneys, came up for the consideration of Judge Toney and a jury to-day. The doctor is a practicing physician, and brought the ac tion for S35, services rendered in the usual way under the unusual contract The defendant declines to pay, and it remains to be seen whether or not he will be forced to liquidate. The case is still on trial. The contract has been recommendedby those who have seen it to doctors who wish a big practice and men who have large families. Dr. McCawley was not unsuccessful with it as he secured between SO and 40 signatures of the best people in the neighborhood. The com prehensive document is as follows: "In anticipation of the advent of cholera into tho United States this year, and a repetition of the scodrgo of typhoid fever and dysentery of last summer, I propose to offer my professional services to my old patrons at the nominal sum of $1 per month for one year, beginning Feb ruary, 18S5. "First I bind myself to visit all the families who may enter into this contract and furnish medicines that physicians usually carry in saddle-pockets in a country practice. "Second My practice will be allopathic "Third Will render surgical aid, perform ing surgical operations, such as amputating limbs, tlneers, toes, adjusting fractures, open ing abscesses and carbuncles, and their after treatment; will also treat gunshot wounds. "Fourth Will look after the sanitary con dition of the family residences and their sur roundings, and will suggest plans and means to ward off diseases, such as occur as epidemic or contagious. "Fifth That I will answer all calls as speed ily as possible. "Sixth Heads of families and single persons entering into this contract bind themselves to pay over to their employer, or some person whom I may suggest the sum of SI on the 1st of each month and every month during tho year. "Seventh If 1 should not have in my pos session such medicine as I may require for the treatment of any particular case, then said head of family, or single person, shall procure said medicine at his own cost on my pre scription; and the heads of families and single persons will furnish such nurses and diet as I may require." The contract was to remain in force a year, and any violation was to nullify it TflE BRAVE KEPOETERS. Tbo Service They Performed for the World In Getting; Flood News. From the Hew Tort Graphic.3 The value of the modern press service has been nowhere so strongly emphasized in late years as in the tragedy of the Conemaugh Val ley. Looking backward half a century and conceiving, if possible, the occurrence of such a disaster, when the stage ooach was the prin cipal means of communication with the coun try, it can be readily understood that the hor rors of Johnstown would have remained almost unknown and unmitigated for weeks and months. Tbo country would have been slow to rouse Itself to a knowledge of the emergency of required relief, and the untold horrors would thereby have been increased ten-fold. The telegraph has brought every part of the country and of the civilized globe into close contact The transmission ot intelligence has becomeas rapid as the lightning itself and the press is the reflection of this intelligence. Newspaper men were the first to risk their lives on the slender rope over the Conemaugh by which communication was established with the ruined town. Correspondents for the great papers pictured the scenes in such graphic pen portraiture that almost before the maddened waters had subsldedtbe great heart of a mighty nation bad been touched with sympathy and pocketbooks and check books made quick re sponse to the cry for help and succor. The correspondents who went to Johnstown have not bad an easy task. Indeed, many of them suffered from deprivation and want quite as much as the citizens themselves. But they were sustained by the knowledge that they were performing a great duty Ho a- stricken people and the public at large. These earnest workers ot the press deserve hearty commenda tion of the people of the country. Tbey have shown not only tneir own merit but tho power and force of the profession which they dignify and make great The Study of Heraldry. from tho New York World.! There is an 'organization in Baltimore, Md., devoted to the study of heraldry. Its coat of arms should be a codfish rampant in a field of golden mushrooms. HANSEN, TflE ARCTIC EXPLORER. Successful End of Ills Trip Across tbo Flatenns of Greenland. Chbistiana, June li On their return to their native country the members of the Nan sen Greenland expedition were tendered a re ception such as no King ever received in Nor way within the memory of the oldest now living. As will be remembered. Dr. Fr. Nansen, a young Norwegian scientist athlete an'd ex pert on "skis-' (Norwegian snowshoes) last year organized an expedition for the purpose of exploring the interior of the great iceplateau of Greenland. The party consisted of six men, all expert and daring ski-runners. This expedition was the fourth organized in recent years for the purposo of exploring the ice desert of Greenland, and the only successful among the four. Dr. Nansen and his men effected a landing on the eastern coast of Greenland, in August last year, and by the middle of that month were ready for the diffi cult march across the icy plains. Nothing was beard of the daring adventurers for months, and great anxiety was felt regarding their safety, when the last Government steamer from Greenland last fall brought the glad tidings that, after a most perilous journey, they had reached the western coast of Greenland by the end of September, and that they were all safe. They were too late to catch the last steamer, however, and thus were compelled to spend the winter at Godthaab, the principal Danish city or colony in Southwestern Green land. They took the first Government steamer this spring, and arrived at Copenhagen on the 21st of May, Mr. Gamel, a wholesalo merchant of that city, having defrayed the expenses of the expedition. For the pxy Danish capital tho explorers were literally loaded down with receptions, dinners, balls, royal orders and bonorsof every description. The denizens of Christiana per ceived that they would have to exert them selves If they should hone to eclipse Copen hagen, and it must be admitted that they have reason to feel proud of their achievements to day. The reception committee included the leading men in scientific, government financial and business circles in Christiauia. The grandest and most original feature of the re ception proceedings was the scenes enacted on the beautiful waters of the Christianlafjarden tho soft lines of which reminds one of the graceful maidenly beauties of Lake Minne tonka. The steamer having the explorers on-board was met in tho middle of the fjord by a fleet consisting of 15 steamboats and hundreds of sloops, schooners, yachts and smallerpleasure crafts, all gaily decorated with an abundance of flags and buntingln the national colors, red, white and blue. Tho day was beautiful. The sky was clear and bright and the fleet pre sented a grand and majestic sight as it headed toward the harbor of the Christiania, the sailing vessels carried on the wings of a mod erate breeze. The quays and Btreets lining the harbor were black with people, and on landing the explor ers were greeted with a tremendous "hurrah." which fairly shook the foundations of tho old town. Of course, the inevitable speech-making had to be gone through, but people cared little about the speakers. The day was made a holi day, practically, and business was all but sus pended. The people felt that the explorers had conquered laurels for old Norway, and that Dr. Nansen had won himself a name as one of the most daring and successful among tho explorers of modern times. They were bound to celebrate. A great people's festival in the evening closed the proceedings of this memor able day, ANOTHER JONAH. An American Sailor Who Was Within a Whale's Month. From the Philadelphia Press.l J. W. Kiesler. late Commander's clerk. United States Navy, now a resident of Hcmesdale, Pa,, tells the following story of a very remarkable experience of an American sailor with a whale. He says: George Leonard, an acting master in the United States Navy during the Civil War, and stationed on board the gunboat Katahdin, West Gulf blockading squadron, in 1863, told a story of heroism, and exhibited marks on his body that corroborated his words. Th year 1850 found Leonard, as one of the crew of tho ship Enterprise, a whaler In the North Pacific. One day he was stationed in the bow of a whale boat a long distance from the ship, with a brave crew who had sighted a whale and made for the monster with all possible dispatch. When within proper distance Leonard threw his har poon, striking the fish hard and deep. In somo manner the line as it was running out caught the body of one of tho men in such a way as to throw him overboard. The man suddenly sank, whereupon Leonard transferred his line to a boatmate and sprang into the ocean in aid of the drowning sailor. The whale. -now maddened by his fast-flowing blood, made a rush tor the boat Remarkable and horrible to relate, Leonard's friend bad managed to regain the boat, while he himself was caught by the whale between his jaws, his position being inside the monster's mouth, with nothing protruding but one of his arms. In this manuer thp man was in reality within the jaws of death itself. The whale instantly plunged down into the deep, and, in the words of Leonard himself, "The fish seemed to bo going down, down into eternity itself." The imprisoned man, after all this, had not lost his presence of mind. He mustered his entire bodily strength and he was a powerful man actually bracing himself in such a posi tion as to compel the fish to spread his jaw: at the same time, with his arm that was free, he grabbed the sheath knife out of its socket cut ting right and left No sooner was there a sufficient opening made than Leonard forced his body outside. Up to the surface he swam, when, most strange to say, he found himself within an arm's lengtn oi nis Doat. He was saved. The marks of the whale's violence and the dents of Its teeth were very plainly visible on Leonard's arms, and he was always pointed out by his brother naval officers as "The Second Jonah." AN INTERESTING DECISION. The Payment of a United Stntes Liquor Tnx Not nn Evidence of Snlc. Belfast, Me., June 11 An interesting liquor case has been decided by the Law Court of Maine. The amended liquor law of Maine says that the payment of a United States liquor tax, as a retail liquor dealer, is prima facie evidence of sale. At tho April term of the Supreme Judicial Court In Belfast Dame O'Connell was convicted as a common seller of intoxicating liquors. The principal witness was a Stato constable, who produced a copy from the records of the Internal Revenue Col lector at Portsmouth, N. H., showing that tho respondent had paid the United States tax. The presiding Judge ruled that tho payment of a United States tax was prima facie evidence that the person paying the same was a liquor seller. O'Connell was couvlctcd, bat his coun sel took exceptions to tho ruling, and the caso went to the Law Court. The opinion of the Court has just been received, and the excep tions sustained. Iu other words, tho Court holds that tho payment of a United States liquor tax is not prima facie evidence of sale. HIS JOKE DID NOT W0E1T. A French Walter Who Passes Himself Off as Admiral Blair. Newbubg, N. Y.. June 11 A few days since a slick-looking, well-dressed individual arrived here and represented himself at the Riverside Hotel tobe Rear Admiral Blair, of the French navy, who had come here to secure information and endeavor to settle up the Van Nostrand troubles at Nice, in which three .American ladies, relatives of Gardiner Van Nostrand, of this city, were the parties Interested. He treated all with whom he came in contact with the greatest civility and ran a good-sized bill at the bar for drinks. Finally suspicion was aroused that he was a fraud and the pro prietress of the hotel had him arrested. He confessed that his name was PclterLulgerson,a French waiter, and was only carrying out a joke, tie was sent to jan ior au uays. UEW OSES OP PHOTOGRAPH!. It Is Employed on nn English Railroad for Many Purposes. From the New Tort Mall and Express.l One of the officials of the Midland Railway, England, is the company's photographer-ln ordinary. The name of his functions is legion. When engines or carriages of a new pattern are constructed he takes a record of their features. If it is reported to the engineer that a viaduct shows signs of giving way. or a wall is cracked. or an embankment has slipped, if tho damage is only slight, instead of going himself to see the state of affairs, he sends the photographer to see and record it for him. If an accident has happened there can thus be no subsequent dispute as to how the engine was lying, or whether the carriages left the rails. MRS. HARRISON DESIRES PRIVACY. The President's Wife Dislikes Llvlnir Under the Public Eye. Mrs. Harrison recently said to a friend: "It may be that after a time I shall get used to the unpleasant features of my present position, but just now I am not in a contented frame of mind. I don't like the White House as a place of residence. I detest the publicity which per tains to our home life, and I regret that I am obliged to see so little of my husband, is it net absurd that my father and the .babies should be gossiped about all over the country? My husband is President but that is no reason wliy'tne rest oi ua unoum pe maaepuDuc characters." -, MAIL P0UCJL The Prerogatives of Mayors Discussed by One Well Posted. To the Editor of The Dispatch: It seems to the writer that thsre was a great oversight at the meeting at City Hall, called by he Mayor for the relief of the Johnstown suf ferers, on June 1. The Mayors of Pittsburg and Allegheny were ignored all through. The Mayor of Pittsburg should have been put at the head and front in respect to his position as the representative of the people. He should have been Chairman of the Executive Commit tee, with the Mayor of Allegheny City Vice Chairman. Had this been done. Mayor Grant, of New York, in all probability would have sent the money collected by him to Mayor William Mc Callln and not to Governor Beaver. Keeping the Mayors ot PittSbnrg and Allegheny City in the background was a slight not to Major Mc Callln and Mayor Pearson alone, but to their fellow citizens who elected them. Mayor McCallin, of Pittsburg, is a respect able, responsible man, who has beeu honored by Pittsburg and Allegheny county. Coroner of the county many years ago, afterward Its Treasurer, and quite lately its Sheriff, and now Mayor of Pittsburg. A man like Mayor McCal. lin, who has thus been honored by tho people of bis native city and county, is certainly en titled to more respect than was shown to him by the Executive Committee for the Johnstown sufferers. We make no reflection on the committee. They are first-class men, and havo worked hard for the relief. Yet there is a prerogative be longing to the Mayor, which he Is entitled to. and If a respectable man as Mayor McCallin the people delight to see him honored before the whole country. The Mayor of a great city, at the head of its affairs, always commands more attention from the dignitaries or other cities than a commit tee without him. Had the Mayor of Pittsburg been head of the Executive Committee, Gover nor Beaver would have known that Pitt3burg had rights which must be respected, as well as Philadelphia, and Its committee with Mayor Fitler at the head of it Contributor. PrrrsBCBO, June 11 TO EEEP STAMPS PROM STICKING. A Novel Method Adopted by a Woman of a Scientific Turn. I saw a nice-looking woman buy SO cents worth of stamps last week, says a New York reporter, and after she got them she opened them out, and deliberately rubbed the backs of them over her back hair. I regarded with insatiable curiosity this ceremony, and when the other woman with her also looked as tounded, and said: "What on earth are you doing?" I listened for the reply. It was: "Oh, if you do that vour stamps won't ever stick together. There is oil enough on your hair always to keep them from getting in the tight wad to which they Incline in hot weather." "And I suppose," said number two, sarcasti cally, "that ft keeps them from sticking to your letters too, and they are shipped off on all sides to the Dead Letter Office because the stamps have dropped off." "I haven't lost a letter in ten years nor a stamp either; the stamps won't come off: there isn't oil enough to keep them from stlckip-; when you wet them, unless you are a dirty thing and put pomatum on it" Thinking that personalities were now likely to triumph over science in this conversation! ceased to follow it but I've since been testing the hair-rubbing business as a preventive of stamp sticking, and find it works perfectly. It is a little embarrassing to go through tbe opera tion in the teeth o( grinning postofllce officials and staring drug clerks, and once when I bought them from a pretty cashier I omitted it, and 14 out of the 20 stamps stuck together. A HUSBAND'S NAME. Judge Beach Gives His Opinion ns to a Widow's Right in It. New York, June 11 Judge Beach, of the Supreme Court has decided an interesting question regarding tho use of a trade name, in which it was claimed that a widow, although she had remarried, was entitled to use her for mer husband's name. Mr. Kurzman conducts a millinery business at Grand and Eldridge streets. Next door is the house of Corkery, Dowling & Co., and over their building, which was similar to tbe other, was also placed the name Kurzman. Mr. Kurzman brought suit at Special Term for an injunction restraining the use of the name. Mrs. Rachel Bebrens, whose name was Kurz man until two years ago, a member of the de fendant firm, claimed she had a right to use the name, especially as it had been used by her former husband in the same business. Justice Beach takes a contrary view, saying: The right to it was ended by bis death, and his widow lost it in her marriage with Behrens: but had not that event happened the law would not permit her to use her own name in a man ner misleading the public to believe her busi ness was that of another person bearing alike cognomen. The evidence leads to the irresist ible conclusion that defendant used the name of Kurzman with intent and purpose to im pose their establishment upon the public as being plaintiff's. DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE MEN. The Benson Women Never Head News- papers on the Street Cars. From the Detroit Free Press. "Anyone riding much on the street cars will notice one peculiarity in regard to women passengers." said an old conductor; "they never read a newspaper on the cars. I often stop the car for some woman to get a paper of a news boy. She'll be in the greatest hurry till she gets It, and then she'll fold it up kind of small and tuck it away in her workbeg." "What do you think is the reason of it?" asked a passenger. "I guess they think it would look too much like the men kind of strong-minded to read it I've seen one or two take a sly look at the head lines, but they never read to amount to auy thlng then. And I'm mortal glad they don't If all the women in the cars took to reading we conductors would never get tbe fares col lected. Only tbe other day a man took a but ton out of his vest pocket and gavo it to me while ho was reading his paper, and they sit up behind them sheets and never see their own wives standing up 'longsldo of them. There is one woman that reads a paper just like a man when she rides down town, but then she is a politician and has to I guess." A Ship's Speedy Trip. New Yobk, Juno 14, Captain Nickels, of the ship State of Maine, of New Castle, Me., is a proud man to-day. He feels sure that hi3 ship has made the quickest voyage on record. The vessel arrived yesterday from Hong Kong, with a cargo of tea, silk and other merchan dise, after a voyage of 92 days. The best trip previous to this was that of the Great Admiral three years ago. Sho made the voyage in 93 days. Captain Nickels believes that if he hadn't missed tbe northeast monSDOn be might have been here sooner. The State of Maine was built in 1878. Sho is of 1.4CT tons burthen, 213 feet long, 40 feet beam and 24 feet deep. Bow Ho Displayed Bis Sorrow. From the Chicago Inter-Ucean.l A New York dude whose aunt died put a lit tle band of crape on each of his cigarettes. FOUNDATIONS OP P0RTUNES. Wanamakeb's first salary was $1.25 a yeek. A. V. Stewart made his start as a school teacher. Jut Keens drove a milk-wagon in a Cali fornia town. Ctbus Field began life as a clerk in a New Englaud store. Pulitzer once acted as stoker on a Missis sippi steamboat "LrCKY" Baldwin worked on his father's farm in Indiana. MosesTaylok clerked in Water street,New York, at ?2 a week. Dave Swinton sold sugar over an Ohio counter for $1 a week. George W. Chiles was an errand boy for a bookseller at $4 a month. J. C. Flood, the California millionaire, kept a saloon in San Francisco. P. T. Babnuk earned a salary as bar-tender in Niblo's Th'eater, New York. Jat Gould canvassed Delaware county, New York, selling maps at SL50 apiece. C. P. Huntington sold butter and eggs for for what he could get a pound or dozen. Andbew Carnegie did his first work in a Pittsburg telegraph office for $3 a week. Whitelaw Reid did work as correspondent of a Cincinnati newspaper for $5 a week. Adah Fobepaugh was a butcher in Phila delphia when he decided to go into the show business. Senator Jos Brown made his first money by plowing his neighbors' fields with a pair of bull calves. OUTCAST L0ND0K'&3M ter from England, publUhed in tomorrovft Dispatch, in which he tells of the work of ricA. and educated young men in London', slum. . . .... . -? ..' s t t. . . . . ,v 'A t ' t 4 ous - 6EEAT GOTHAM'S GOSSIP. Slnlcted n Boblnll Car Company. I TORS BOBEJin SPECIALS.! New Yobk, June 11 Mrs. Angelia Lock wood tried to alight from a bobtail car while it was. being swung on a turn-table. She was thrown to the floor and received severe Internal injuries. A jury to-day directed tbe bobtail car company to pay her $10,000 damages. movements of Oar Navy. Bear-Admiral Gberardi this morning trans ferred ;hls flag from tbe Galena to the Kear sarge, which 13 to go to Hayti. Tbe Kearsarge will leave for Port-au-Prince on Sunday. There was a rumor to-day that she Is sent to protect American interests, which bare been imperiled by a renewal of the fight between the factions there. It was said that one of the factions had seized a steamship of the Clyde line. With favorable weather the old ship may get to Hayti in a week. .The cruiser Bos ton will sail to-morrow for the city she is named after, to take part in the celebration -of tbe one hundred and thirteenth anniversary of tho battle of Bunker Hill. Will Honor tbe Party Leaders. Chief Justice Fuller has had the old mansion known as Leland Castle, at New Bochelle, re paired and renovated throughout, and will oc cupy it this summer. He expects Grover Cleveland will be his guest during July, and the banner Democratic town ot Westchester county is preparing to honor both distinguished gentlemen. How Marlon Mauola Was Left. Miss Marion Manola is sorry that shileft the McCaulI Opera Company a few days ago In a huff, because Eugene Oudin, the tenor, pushed her on the stage. She told the manager to-day that she was ready to resume her part, which has been filled by Josephine Knapp since Miss Manola's defection. All her penitence did not help her, however. The manager refused to take her back, and laughed at her excuse that she had been ill. Miss Manola's next contract with Colonel McCaulI goes Into effect on Sep tember L SHE SEEKS RELIEF. A Mother Whose Daughter Suffered at Bald Eagle Valley. To tbn Editor of Tbe Dlspatcn: Why is it that the .Relief-Committee won't help any of the sufferers from tbe floods except the Johnstown sufferers? My son-in-law and my daughter were flooded out in Bald Eagle Valley, one mile above Ridgeway, and lost all they had, and, besides, she sprained her back trying to save her things. So they are in dis tress. Well. I was down to town trying to get some relief for them. I got nothing but my feelings hurt I am so nervous and confused I can scarcely write. I was at the Chamber of Commerce. They asked me if my daughter had a husband, said he ought to be able to support her, and said a woman of my appearance ask ing charityl Well. I got so weak I could scarcely walk, so I staggered down to the Relief Committee and stated my case. They told me Imust get anote from tbe Chamber of Commerce. I was so weak I asked for a cup of coffee and offered to pay for it, but was refused, to my very great mortification. If this is what you call charityl I wasn't asking for chanty only for assistance to get them down here and to help them to some wearing apparel. Will yon please answer this and tell me where it is best to go for relief? Yours very respectfully, Anna M. Meddock, Laweenceville, Ravine Street, Thir teenth Ward, June 11 SATED BI A PET DOG. A Young Lady Who Owes Her Life to a Faitbfal Black and Tan. FEOM A STATE COBBEHFONDXXT.l Johnstown, June 14. Outside of U minor cases of surgery performed on patients whose wounds were received while clearing the wreck, there were only two sufferers brought to the Bedford street hospital to day. Bridget Nailor, CS years old. Is suffering intensely from pneumonia, contracted by exposure in the water, and is in a very low condition. The other case is that of James Claussen, 21 years old. who was brought from Nineveh. He was afflicted with measles, and transferred to the Bed Cross Hospital, where all contagious diseases are treated. A young lady named Emma Morgan, whose life was saved bya pet black-and-tan dog. is an inmate of tbe Bedford hospital She was fastened under a log when the flood swept her house down, and the dog clnng to her, barking and whining, uutil his cries attracted the at tention of Mr. Morgan, who was searching for his daughter. Miss Morgan was rescued in tbe nick of time and is now being treated for injuries received by the falling debris. . i Bahueb. THAT BURIED LITTLE FLOATER. A Portrait That Is Very Closely Scanned by QIany In Johnstown. IFBOJI a statp cobrespondent.i Johnstown, June 11 An unknown little girl, aged about 5 years, was found in the Ohio river at Vanport, near Rochester, Pa., on the day after tbe flood. There was nothing on the body to identify her, and she was buried in Beaver Cemetery. As a means of ascertaining to whom she belongs, a photograph was taken of her, and copies will be distributed through out the devastated district m the hope ot reach ing some friend or relative. A copy was sent from llearer to-day by Undertaker Alkins and exhibited at.the rooms of the Children's Aid Society. It attracted the attention of many callers, who scanned the face closely to see if tbey couiu recognize any laminar leatures; out none have identified her yet The pictures are sold for 23 cents each to pay for a tombstone. Bahueb. Milking: It Easy. From the New York World. I It is rumored that certain Chicago capitalists are about to place a "nlckel-in-the-slot suicide machine" on the market TRI-STATE TRIFLES. The laziest man In Beaver county, Pennsyl vania, is said to reside in Rochester township, near the borough line. He is a husband and father, and is said to be so lazy that when he comes in for dinner, instead of going to tbe pump, which Is only a few feet from tbe door, he will pour the water off tbe potatoes which are cooking on the stove, and wash his hands in it This is vouched for by those who know. A NUMBER of Bellefonte, Pa., women sensi bly put on masculine attire to clean up after the flood. Mks. A. L. Martin, of Little Beaver town ship, Lawrepce county, Pennsylvania, recently discovered a needle protruding from one of her lower limbs, and succeeded in removing it from the flesh. Thirty-eight years ago, whilo a little girl, she was playing with ber dolls and bad a needle in her mouth. An older person coming into the room playfully picked her up and laid her in tbe open drawer of a bureau, causing her to swallow tbe needle. This cir cumstance had been forgotten, but was re called to her mind by the reappearance of the needle. In Its devious wanderings the little piece of steel has caused many unpleasant symptoms, from which medical skill failed 'to relieve her. The latest swindle practiced on housekeep ers in New Castle, Pa., is the sale of what is purported to be a chemical article for cleaning wall paper. It is sold for 25 cents per box, and at nrst appearance when sold seems to clean paper admirably, but when laid away it will dry up as bard as a rocK. An examination of a box recently sold shows It to be nothing more than flourand water. A besident of South Williamsport, Pa., who had put hl3 two pigs in his parlor to shield tLom from the flood soon after missed them, and concluded they bad got out and drowned. At bedtime, on going upstairs to his room, he found the two stowed in his bed, and fast asleep. Mb. Peeling states as a peculiarity that preceded'' tho late flood at Lock Haven, Pa., that large earth worms crawled up the side of bis barn. A little girl down in Preston county, West Virginia, has a pet rabbit which for some time past has been leaving the house at night and returning In the morning, Her brother fol lowed it the other night and found that It went about two miles from the house to a rockery and disappeared into ops' of the openings. He went home and the next day, with some of his companions, returnedto the place. On remov ing several of the rocks where the rabbit was seen to enter, tbey came upon a nest of snakes, some 10 or 13 In number, queer companions for a rabbit: y- CURIOUS CONDENSATIONS. Of sixteen applicants for charity who were followed about by an officer in Chicago, every one proved to be a base impostor, and 12 of them bad stolen articles from houses where money had been given them. A prominent citizen of Parsons, Kan., determined to sup with a party of friends against the will of his wife. He was resolved that he would, and she that he should not go. His friends missed him, and just for fun in vaded bis residence, where they found him and his wife sitting in their chairs fast asleep. He had given her an opiate that lie might slip away, and she had given him one that he might not This story comes from Boston: A lady opposed to corporal punishment visited a school, not in a fashionable part of the city.just as a boy was being flogged. Before going away she spoke to the culprit and asked him to come and see her on a certain evening, promising to make it pleasant for him. At tbe appointed hour a boy, dressed in his best came, and for an hour and more the lady and her daughter laid themselves out to jmnw him Then the lady began to speak of the importance of good behavior and obedience to rules, when the boy interrupted her: "Oh, I ain't that feller I He gi'me 10 cents to tome Instiderhim." The French Court of Appeal has con firmed a judgment annulling the will of Frenchman named Louis August Travers, who died in 1883, and left his money to the London Workhouse or poor. He instructed his execu tor to consign bis body to the deep just off the English coast declared that France had always oppressed him. that the French were a nation of dastards and fools, and that be only wished that he might give them to the English, the born enemies of stupid France. The Court held that the London poor and workhouses had no legal representatives, and that such anti patnotic sentiments indicated insanity. Front of Macedonia Church,in Columbia county, Georgia is a quivering tree. Years ago, the negroes of the neighborhood say, a murder was done under its branches. Two men had accompanied a woman to church and after she had entered the edifice they quarreled about her, and one cut the other to death. The mur derer escaped, and ever sincer every limb, small and large, on the tree trembles as if in fear or as a suffering animal would quiver. This oc curs when not a breath or air is stirring. No negro in Columbia county can be Induced to pass the so-called haunted spot alone at night Prominent gentlemen say they have noticed the phenomenon, but no explanation of it baa ever been volunteered. Probably the queerest character that haa been received in the asylum at Milledgeville, Ga., recently, is a young fellow brought from Walker county. The subject of bis derange ment is spelling, and it is said he went crazy during the spelling bee craze several years ago. He uses the same letters for spelling any word given him. and invariably pronounces the re sult of his babbling ''asafetlda." When given a word to spell he throws open one corner of his mouth and yells at tbe top of his voice: "B-a ba, y-a ya, g-a ga, f-a fa, d-f di, asafetida." He can be seen most any time about tbe yard spelling for tbe amusement of the crowd, who generally award him a chew of tobacco for his effort There is an old man working on the farm of a gentleman living in Augusta, Ga., by the name of Stearns, who sees all sorts of su pernatural things. He is a Bostonian. and has not been successful on Southern fanna. He claims to commune with spirits,and hold3many midnight conferences with them in the lonely swamps on the farm which he works. He is dreaded by the negToes of tbe neighborhood. His gesticulations and ejaculations at times, when spirits appear to him, are weird and un earthly, and fear of their recurrence causes people to shun him. He addresses his negro farm hands as Mr. and Mrs. and miss, and is thoroughly hated by them. The farm which he works is about six miles from Augusta. The relative hardness of woods is calcu lated by the hickory, which is the toughest Estimating that at 100, we get for pignut hick ory, 86; white oak, 84; white ash. 77; dogwood, 74; scrub oak, 73; white hazel, 72; apple tree, 70; red oak. 69: white beecb, 63; black walnur, 63; black birch. 62; yellow and black oak. 60; hard maple, 68; white elm, 58; red cedar, 68; cherry, 53; yellow pine, 53; chestnut 52; yellow poplar, 61; butternut and white bircb, 43; and white pine, 35. According to this formula, woods possessing a degree of hardness equal to only about 40 per cent or less than that of bickorv, should not be classed as hard woods. Such woods are, however, limited in quantity, and are not of sufficient Importance to justify a classification, and the trade will continue to construe hard wood to mean everything except white pine. Some parties down South had been fish- j ing and brought In some very fine trout, some- of which fell Into the hands of a certain doc tor. Upon cleaning and dissecting them be found upon the inside lining of the swimming bladder tbe perfect picture of a tree displayed in crimson hue, as perfect and as distinctly as the most delicate and skilled hand of the artist painter could delineate. To find thus upon the fine and delicate body of a fish a beautiful picture of the different trees of the forest is something new and an advanced step in natural history. In this case there was a post mortem made upon two fish. In one was found the picture of a pine tree, with trunk and branches remarkably distinct In tho other, a ma ple tree was seen as satisfactory as could be de sired. Naturalists say that the imprint thus appearing is made from the shade of tbe tree reflected in the water In which the fish con stantly remain. If the fish lives in a lake over which the boughs of the maple extend, then we find In the fish tha picture of the maple, and so of any other tree and in every other instance. This is true only of the trout and found in no other fish. MEANT TO BE FUNNY. Speech is not always silver. It is some? times sounding brass. Bolton-Gazette. Namby I hear, Pamby, that you pos sess an eitlmable wife. Famby (sadly) No, ihe posseBiea me.Xankec Blade. Mr. Younghusband Darling, yon have been weeping. What Is it my sweetest love.' Mrs. Touaghosband Horseradish. Detroit fret Press. Algernon Say, grandpa, here's a picture of a Roman banquet, and they are all lying down to eat. They don't do that way now do they? Grandpa ErweU, yes, there Is more or less lying done at public dinners still. Orip. Tbe Last Chance Miss Lillie And so Mr. Flutterby proposed to you last evening? Really, what did you think of It at the t me? Miss Rose (with firmness) That It should be the last evening fce'd propose to anybody. Didn't 1 accept?-Puct. It Comes Too Late. Mr. Morris Towne 1 tee Edison has invented a far-sighted ma chine. Mr. Harlem Rhodes Tes: I wish he had put it on the market betore I began to build a Queen Anns cottage in a suburban "1'ark." Puck. Wickwire I wish to goodness somebody would Invent a way to distinguish between a type writing machine and the girl who runs It. Taba ley I should think a man of ordinary sense would have no trouble In doing so. Wickwire V, you idiot I mean In writing. I received a bill stating that I was Indebted to Blank 4 Co. for "ribbon for typewriter," and my wife got hold of it and raised a dickens ofa row for about an boor before she'd let me explain. Terre uaute M-xpress. A Last Besort Mr. JobLott John, send, me a boy. Mr. Avredge-The boys are all out sir. Mr. Lott-King for a district messenger. 31r. Avredge Very sorry, sir; but the messen ger call Is oat of order. Mr. I.ott-I mast get a message to Blank Blank somehow, and I can't spare time to run around and tee them. Are the under clerks at dinner? Mr. Avredge Tes, sir. Mr. Lott (despairingly) Then I will have to usa the telephone. Puck. No Account Distinguished Foreigner I am told that the moment a little English flag was hung from a private residence In New York on tbe Queen's birthday the street was filled with a howling mob, and the flag bad to be taken down. American Official Vis, sorr. Distinguished Foreigner And yet the Irish flag waved from tbe City Hall all St. Patrick's Day without a ripple or excitement? American Official Vis, sorr. The Englishhadn't backbone enough ter say wan wor-r-d, sorr. Distinguished Foreigner How about the Amer icans? American Official Begorry, who cares far tblmr-Pue. A MODEST MAID. Young Lochinvar came from the West, By affection deep Incited, To claim the maiden most mod -est To whom his troth was plighted. "Ob, Mary, mine 1 My matchless maid! You know I love yon madly. And I have built a home," he said. Which needs yonr presence sadly." "Tl j but a mod est little nest . - The rooms are two In number One room to cook in. one for rest , All built of undressed lumber." -, VbrJobnl" cried she. Her burning faeerV She bid upon his breast - T "Bow can one build a modest place . -vJ'''iL With lumber all undressed?" .t-tUOen ZftfrWH StfttUft .iAm," jf.j..,. Jsfifei S, r rV J- ", J- . Y