Pittsburg dispatch. (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, May 12, 1889, Image 4

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!CEE PITTSBTTE&' DISPATCH,"
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ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8. KM.
Vol. 44, So. St Entered it Pittsburg Fostofflce,
yovember 14, 18S7, u second-class matter.
Business Office 97 and 99 Fifth Avenue.
News Booms and Publishing House 75,
77 and 79 Diamond Street.
Average net clrculntlon of the daily edi
tion of The Dispatch, for lx months ending
May 1.1SS9.
28,051
Copies per Issnc.
Average net drenlation of tbe Snnday edl
Uon of The Dlipctch for April, 1SS9,
46,143
Coptes ner Issa e.
TERMS OF THE DISPATCH.
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year 1000
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quarter. -. 2 SO
DAU.T Dispatch, including Sunday, one
month 90
Bdndat Dispatch, oneye&r 2 GO
Weekly DisrATCn, one year. 125
The Daily Dispatch Is delivered by carriers at
35 cents per week, orlnclndlngtbeBundayeditlos,
at 20 cents per week.
EP1TTSBOEG, SUNDAY. MAY 12, 1SS9.
Voluntary contributors should keep copies of
crimes. If compensation is desired the price
expected miul he named. The courtesy 0 re
turning rejected manuscript will be extended
tchen stamps for that purpose are enclosed, but
the Editor 0 The Dispatch will under no
circumstances be responsible for the care of un
solicited manuscripts.
This issue of THE DISPATCH contains
SO pases, made up of THREE PARTS.
Fnilnre on the part of Carriers, Agents,
Newsdealers or Newsboys to supply pa
trons with a Complete Number should be
promptly reported to this offlce.
POSTAGE All persons who mail the
Snnday fasne of The Dispatch to friends
should bear In mind the fact that the post
age thereon Is Two (2) Cents. All double
nnd triple number copies oi The Dispatch
require a 2-cent stamp to Insure prompt
delivery.
AIT 1H TEH-STATE CAPITAL.
Very nroperly the Exposition Society de
cided yesterday to invite the Governors oi
Ohio, "West Virginia and Maryland to
assist with Governor Beaver, of Pennsyl
vania, at the exercises of the May Musical
Festival. As a delightful prelude to the
greater event of next fall the opening of
the Exposition itself the Festival has a
special interest beside what justly attaches
to it because of the musical programme.
Large sections of the neighboring States are
concerned in Pittsburg's growth. Its situa
tion, its prominence as a manufacturing
and mercantile center, its substantial re
sources, make it a sort of inter-State indus
trial market and capital a fact which is
not lost sight of in the mere distinctions of
political names and boundary lines.
The Governors will all be welcome. They
will hear rare music splendidly rendered,
and they will see the most thriving and
promising city on the continent.
TEE MUTE EXPLOSION.
The explosion of gas in a coal mine of this
Vicinity by which four miners lost their
v lives yesterday is a new enforcement of the
old lesson of constant vigilance against such
disasters. Tbe statement of the case indi
cates a relaxation of the vigilance which
long experience has shown to be necessary.
The statement that the flow of natural gas
which in coal mines is simply fire damp
was used in the mine for light and fuel, and
that it was permitted to go out by mistake
and then ignited by the miners, establishes
a prima facie case of neglect. "With the
flow of gas known and utilized, the utmost
precautions were required; while the state
ment indicates rather that the usual precau
tions were lacking. The unfavorable aspect
may be somewhat mitigated if the mine was
not, as appears to be the case, in operation
at the time,; but in any shape it emphasizes
the need of never-ending precautions against
this constant and fatal danger.
TEE TROUBLES AT DTJ0.TJESNE.
The continuance of the labor troubles at
Duqnesne, and the appointment of fresh
deputies by the Sheriff with, the avowal
that he is going to preserve order there if he
las to keep a thousand men on the ground,
attracts new attention.. It warrants the
repetition of what The Dispatch has said
heretofore. Individual rights and the su
premacy of law mnst be maintained, and
the strikers 'will only alienate the support
that is most valuable to them by ignoring
that fact.
For a time after the case was last before
the Court, the strikers showed a disposition
to respect the legal rights of their antagon
ists. But of late, unless they are misrepre
sented by their own friends, they have for
gotten their duty to obey the law. The de
struction of supplies going to the men em
ployed by the workers in the mill has been
heralded as a victory for the strikers; and
threats of force have been resumed. All
this is a fatal error. So long as the men
obey the law they have the sympathy of the
public. When they place themselves in
antagonism to the law they deprive them
selves of all right to public sympathy.
In. addition to this, the semi-civilized
nature of such a trial of strength for the
settlement of wages questions is rapidly be
coming evident from the fact that this
strike will not have to last mucb longer be
fore it will cost both parties as much as the
amount of wages which is in dispute.
BELLEW'S W0BST OFFENSE.
The testimony of that noted theatrical
masher and idol of silly women, Mr. Kyrle
Bellew, in the scandalous divorce case now
going on in Chicago, is justly held up as a
warning to any woman who seeks to offer
homage at the shrine of some theatrical
object of their transient affections. The
warning is certainly shown to have been a
needed one. SeveraJ women whose connec
tion with Mr. Bellew cannot hut be damag
ing 0 theirrepntation, were exposed by his
evidence; 'and the only thing that rescued
others from the result of their folly was the
merciful Interposition of (the Court in ex
cluding all mention of their names as for
eign to the case on trial.
"While this feature of Mr. Bellew's testi
mony cannot but be destructive of his pop
ularity among the female worshipers of
masculine and made-up beauty on the
stage, another point was brought out in his
disposition which should create disapproval
among the whole of the American people.
Mr. Bellew testified that he tanght Mrs.
"Potter the part of Cleopatra which she has
recently presented- The damage to private
reputation which Mr. Bellew's disclosures
produce is certainly blameworthy; bnt
there is a compensatory thought that those
v who are the most damaged have their own j
folly to blame for it But when Mr. Bellew
in his own statement convicts himself of the
injury inflicted on the stage and the vio
lence wrought on Shakespearean drama, by
assuming the responsibility for Mrs. Pot
ter's Cleopatra, he virtually pleads guilty
to the crime oi dramatio murder in the
first degree. In contrast to the folly of
Mr. Bellew's other victims,it is necessary to
point out that the stage and Shakespeare
were, in this case, entirely innocent of any
wrong-doing. So far as Mrs. Potter is con
cerned, also, it seems necessary to acquit
her of any such mental capacity with regard
to the rules of dramatic art as would make
her capableof responsibility. Mr. Bellew thus
being solely responsible for that extraordi
nary production known-as Mrs. Potter's
Cleopatra, he has a heavy charge to answer
before the outraged theater-going-public.
In other words, Mr. Kyrle BeUew con
victs himself of having smirched the stage'
about as much as he has smirched any private
reputation which has become entangled
with his. As to Mr. Bellew's own reputation,-
it seems by his own story to have
been fully earned.
A FEBI0D OF EXHAUSTING WOBX
The hot spell will not be esteemed un
timely by the President anil his Cabinet,
nor by those of tbe Senators and Congress
men wbo do not inwardly delight in the
dispensation of the "bon-bons" of office, if
it drive superfluous situation seekers out of
the capital, to tbeir homes, to the sea shore,
to the green lanes and dusty roads of the
country anywhere, in short, only be it that
they cease from troubling and sink to rest.
In these post-inauguration days when the
Government of, the country is being trans
formed into an "intelligence and employ
ment" office on a huge scale, the anxieties
and tbe worry of the heads of the adminis
tration and of the Senators and Bepresenta
tives in adjudicating and pushing claims of
all sorts, so many of which are destined to
prove hopeless, must make an enormous
strain upon even their physical energies.
Bow many of them would not wish from
the bottom of their hearts that the standard
which "Washington set up of considering
only the public service, and not at all per
sonal favor or prejudices or pressure from
abroad, had to this day been followed.
None quicker than these officials would, if
they spoke their thoughts, testify with
Bishop Potter, that the Jacksonian motto
of spoils following victory involved a per
rsnnial affliction.
The position of President Harrison is un
ei viable in the midst of this terrific pressure
for place. It is not enough that with his
advisers he has to undergo endless solicita
tion and challenges to pass upon conflicting
claims; but because of failure to perform a
new miracle of loaves and fishes, and make
every office answer for two, three or a dozen
cpplicants, he will have to hear it additi
onally proclaimed in many Quarters, witnt
a glee or resentment he may not be able to
share, that his appointments and refusals
are meant to recognize this factiotfor to rebuke
thai Considering that from New York to
Podunk every election district has its con
flicting faction, its Cromwells, its village
Hampdens, and fighting leaders who may
occasionally be inglorious, but are seldom
mute, it is easy to reflect what a charming
time of it the President must consider him
self as having, if, looking over the expres
sions through the country which follow his
appointments, he is to consider himself as
not only having settled between the rival
claimants for office, but equally and finally j
in every instance as to everything that may
come between their respective supporters.
To the country or to the personal fortunes
of the administration even, it matters little
who fills office, so long as it is honestly and
capably filled. It is the graver question of
legislation and business policy which would
constitute mainly the cares of the real
statesmen if they had their choice. But for
the present the distribution of the offices
has the boards; and though it is the task in
which the general public take the least per
manent interest, it is the one assuredly
which is most wearing on the very best ma
terial in the Cabinet and in Congress.
'PEESIDE2TT BOBEBTS' SOUND SENSE.
A good deal of instruction is to be ob
tained by the public from President
Boberts' recent testimony before the Senate
investigation upon the subject of railroad
pools. Mr. Boberts had the frankness to
state the exact facts as to the actual result
of railroad pooling; and the consequence is
that he gave a very different view of it from
that which other prominent advocates of
railway ideas presented to the committee.
Mr. Boberts stated that the pools cost a
great deal of money, and did not serve the
purpose that they were intended to serve.
He recognized the fact that they had in
creased the construction 'of competing lines,
and also that there was nothing to enforce
the agreements which they set up to govern
the railroads. He stated in addition that
pooling tended to prevent the natural de
velopment of the railroads, and that well
regulated and natural competition was for
more healthy than any kind of combina
tion. "While Mr. Boberts has not yet ar
rived at the degree.of enlightenment neces
sary to recognize that the ruinous railway
wars are the natural outgrowth of the combi
nation policy, he gave several solid facts to the
committee on which to base some very in
structive ideas on the subject of pooling.
This is exactly what the advocates of the
popular theories on the tubject of railway
control have been urging for several years.
They have pointed out that the first success'
of the Trunk Line pool called into existence
three new trunk lines from Chicago to New
York; that the prevalence of railway wars
has been multiplied by a high factor and
that in every respect the legitimate inter
ests of solvent and. well managed railroads
were damaged by pooling. It is only useful
to rescue a heavily watered or dishonestly
handled railroad from the mistakes or ras
cality of its management. Mr. Boberts was
perfectly correct in showing the details in
which that much vaunted practice hampers
the legitimate operations of solidly-capitalized
and intelligently operated railroads.
Mr. Boberts might also have stated, bnt
did not, that, so long as a great railroad can
choke off competing lines, in disregard of
the laws and the Constitution it does not
need the services of a pool.
CAPTURED BY' THE TBUSTS.
The majority icport of the, New York
Assembly Committee that has been investi
gating trusts, reveals the fine Italian hand
of some of the trust attorneys. It goes over
the usual stereotyped arguments of the de
structive nature of competition and the ne
cessity of a certain degree of combination,
which the trust managers have been preach
ing upon all occasions when they find it
necessary to defend their conspiracies.
All of which is unadulterated nonsense.
Free and natural competition is not de
structive. Competition, in the retail tiades,
in tbe raising of agricultnral products, in
tbe mining of bitnminous coal and in a
thousand other branches of universal nature,
has goneswitbout the slightest restriction
for years and has worked no destruction
whatever: 'The New York committee says,
that the result of the, ruinous competition is
often to form combinations; but that re
markable body lacks either the intelligence
or the frankness to say that the .ruinous cut
ting of prices far below the cost of produc
tion, is always a distinct method of, forcing
the establishment of pools or trusts.
People who indulge in this sort of logic
are either the advocates or the dupes of the
combination-policy. The remarkable differ
ence between the first report of this commit
tee and its present one permits us to exalt
its intelligence at the expense of its honesty.
A vert good measure of the fuss over the
competition of tbe Canadian railroads is af
forded by the-editorial remark of the "Wash
ington Pott that "some relief might be ef
fected by making such of them as do busi
ness with the United States amenable to
to the United States law. "When the es
teemed Post is informed that that is exactly
what has been already done by the inter
State commerce law, it may be able to see
thaUhereisagood deal of nonsense about
the present investigation.
Mb. Glabkson removed the heads of a
thousand Democratic Postmasters last week,
and presents the plea that he wasn't feeling
very well, either. It Eeems necessary to
draw a veil over the slaughter that would
have ensued if Mr. Clarkson had been in
the enjoyment of his usual stalwart health.
CobpobaIi Tahneb's public announce
ments as to the changes which he is going to
make in pension matters, which are gener
ally supposed to be regulated by legislation,
makes it pertinent to remark that if he can
take that $150,000,000 which the Pacific rail
ways owe the Government and distribute it
among the, pensioners, no one would object
to that extraordinary exertion of power by
an executive officer, over the laws.
Tbe trouble with this year's weather so
far has been that it is entirely too sudden
and violent Storms, heat and cold have
all been hurled at the country in square and
solid chunks. Milder doses ot each sort
will be much pleasanter now,
Some New York statesmen are trying to
get a law passed to prevent the publication
of reports of dog fights and prize fights.
They would do better to consider the prac
ticability of passing laws to prevent the
fights themselves. The statesmen should
reflect upon the fact that if there are no dog
fights or prize fights no reports of them will
ever be published. .
The last new opera by Von Suppe is pro
duced in this country under the title of
"Clover." This makes it necessary to ex
tend the hope that the pigs will not7 be
too riotous in the clover at the time of its
production.
Colonel Elliott P. Shefahd is an
nounced to furnish the next leading article
for FrankLeslie's Illustrated. His subject
is, "Can a xfewspaper Editor be a Chris
tian ?" 'The article would be very interest
ing if there was any assurance that Colonel
Shepard has the slightest idea of the quali
fications either of a newspaper editor or of a
Christian.
And now the story of the- new Standard
refinery near Chicago will give our friends,
the Standard month-organs, room for ex
ercising their undoubted abilities in the line
of swearing that it is not so.
Botcangeb's latest blast is evidently
intended to assure the French people that
he- is still alive and kicking. No doubt can
be entertained of his indulgence In the latter
act; but whether he is really any better than
a dead issue may be considered a disputed
point In politics, he who runs away does
not often live to fight another day.
Of coursethe weather prophets are now
all improving the opportunity to tell how
they foretold this storm. This is always the
dire result oi any big weather event
Joe Howabd says in the New York
Press: "I have not the faintest objection to
the San Francisco Examiner appropriating
my matter and giving it to its readers."
This unwonted generosity on the part of
Joseph makes it plain that, hereafter, the
objections will have to come from the JJz
aminer't readers.
PEOPLE OP PEOMINEflCE.
General Simon- Cameron is reported
better, and no serious conseqnences are an
ticipated. It is probable that the Bev. Dr. Leonard, of
St John's Church, Washington, D. C.', will be
elected BRhop of Ohio next week.
The baby King of Spain is coins to the Paris
Exposition in June: He will be the youngest
monarch who ever visited that city.
Jacob H. Gallinoee wiU enter the lists
against Hon. William E. Chandler for the po
sition of Senator from New Hampshire.
Goveknok Gordon, of Georgia, who'f ought
like a tiger to establish the Southern Con
federacy, pays a public compliment to Bather
ford B, Hayes. He says justice has not been
done to the ex-President by either party.
Mas. Roscoe Conkltno owns a necklace de
signed by Napoleon I. It Is very exquisite in
workmanship, tne enameling being famous for
its brilliancy. He personally supervised its
manufacture. After bis death it was said to
have found its way to this country, where it
was purchased by Mr. Conkling.
Walt Whitman, the poet is to be tendered
a complimentary dinner on his seventieth
birthday, which occurson the Slst of May.
Among those who are expected to be present
are Colonel Robert Ingersoll, Mark Twain,
Felix L Oswald, E. C. Stcadman and a number
of otber distinguished men. A poem will be
read from Whitter especially for the occasion,
and letters are expected from Tennyson and
other well known poets.
Edward Eggleston, the author, now re
siding in New York, is a member of theCen
tuary and Authors' Clubs, and is always a con
spicuous figure, with his long, luxuriant hair
and beard, which are very dark, bat are just
beginning to turn gray. He Is said to wear
his hair longer than any man in Christendom,
and Henry Ward Beecher, forgetting, his
name for a moment once called to him in
prayer meeting, "Come up here, you shaggy
manl" And Mr. Eggleston responded to tbe
call.
Rider Haggard, the novelist will visit
Persia and surrounding countries unattended.
He is an experienced traveler, and is used to
the ways of the Orient When he starts oft on
an expedition like the one he now contemplates
he always buys a small dog to accompany him.
This is tbe only weapon he takes with him.
Ho claims that the carrying of firearms is apt
to awaken hostility among strangers. He de
votes his attention to winning tbe affection of
his dog, and says that a faithful canine com
panion is tbe best thing a man can have for a
long journey.
What Interests the Ohio Man.
From the San Francisco AltaO
An Ohio manwantstobe Minister to Hawaii.
Why can't the East let the coast have that
office? Ohio isijacertain as to where Hawaii
is, bnt it has learned of the existence of the
office, and that is all the bait a Buckeye needs
to'set him running.
St. Loots Can't Forgive Hits.
From the Globe-Democrat J
The new Public Printer, Hon. F. W. Palmer,
has been a citizen of Chicago tor a good many
years; but in all other respects' bis reputation
Ishtt-claee, ?;.' ' ""''
THE TOPICAL TAMEB.
A Hirer Party KyrleBellew'sLatest Chat
About Well-Kaown Hon A Ballade of
the month. .,
Tub steamer Scotia, which sailed from this
port on Friday etching, had on board a party
of ladles numbering nearly SO. They were the
wires and daughters of well-known professional
and otber gentlemen of the two cities. It is a
pleasure trip entirely. The party will return
from Cincinnati, which is their destination,
with the Scotia. It was unfortunate for them
that tbe storm broke so heavily on the very
first night of their 'experience on the water;
but it may be some consolation to them to know
that the high water whlch'follows such a storm
will give them a stage in tho river to bring
them safe back again. The trip to Cincinnati
and back takes the Scotia about six or seven
days. The river trips used to be more popular
than they are to-day, but I have noticed this
spring a revival of this very pleasant way of
touring. Thervalley of the Ohio just now is in
its most beautiful state. Tbe trees are in full
leaf, and the green hills are resplendent in
color.
Kyble Bellew, the male but not mascu
line actor, who has been with Mrs. Potter all
this season, has added considerably to his un
pleasant reputation as a witness in the Carter
trial in Chicago. It is not to be presumed that
he cares a snap about being connected in any
way with such a disgraceful, dispute as that of
Mr. and Mrs Carter for divorce. He has had
plenty of experience cf that sort
I remember a fanny incident which illustrates
this theatrical butterfly's admiration .of him
self. During the western voyage of the City
of New York, of the Inman Line, last summer,
a committee of passengers was appointed, as
the custom Is, to get.up a concert for the bene
fit ot certain seamen's hospitals in New York
and Liverpool. They proceeded to gather in
all tho people who had tho slightest talent in
the way of singing or acting. Among tbe latter
Mr. Kyrle Bellew was included; bnt he said that
his contract with Mrs. Potter precluded his ap
pearing at such an entertainment He told the
committee, however, that he had a number of
photographs which he would be glad to inscribe
with his precious autograph and allow them to
be sold for the benefit of the hospitals. The
committee, not unnaturally, respectfully and
gratefully declined this generous oiler.
V
The other day I was talking, to an operatic
singer, or rather one who has at ono time been
on the operatic stage, about the unfortunate
habit some singers have of drinking. He Said
the temptations were always great for a singer
to drink, that the exercises of the throat
seemed In some fashion to excite thirst He
said he was always able to resist the temptation
except during the last week of tbe season, then
he said everybody from the callboy to the im
pressario and high-priced tenor, got, as sure as
fate, under the influence of liquor most beauti
fully. "Nobody," he said, "could appreciate the
.feeling of joy which fills an operatic singer
When he knows that the season is going to
close, and It is only natural, if the singer be a
man, that he should fly to drink."
V
Mb. Leonard Wales, the composer, con
ducting his own opera at the Grand Opera
House yesterday afternoon, contrastedstrange
ly with Mr. Leonard Wales, the reporter, grind
ing out gems of thought from abont the South
side two or three years ago for the benefit of
the Chronicle Telegraph. I sincerely hope, as
do his otber newspaper friends, that this is but
the beginning of a successful career in music
for Mr. Wales.
V
It was a graceful act of the Art Society to
ignore some silly reflections upon Chevalier
Scovel's personal character made earlier in the
week, to invite him to their ISOth reception at
the Pittsburg Club Theater on Friday night
As it was the' last reception of the season a
very large number of the members were pres
ent and Chevalier Scovel's singing was greatly
appreciated. He was in good voice, and the
impression he made personally was good also,
"
Of all the judges who ornament In oneway
or another the bench of this county, I have al
ways considered Judge Ewing the mostjower
f ul in observation. That Is, he seems to me to
be better able to read human nature than his
brothers on the bench. Yesterday I heard a
rather good story which confirms me in my
view.
Sometime in 1S0S Jndge Ewing, with his sisi
ter and some friends, took a trip through tne
lakes to Dnluth. The day before the party
Janded the opening of the line of railway be
tween St Paul and Duluthhad been celebrated
with very many imposing ceremonies. A num
ber of distinguished statesmen had been asked
to be present as it was deemed tbe most im
portant railway development of the West at
that time. Among the visiting statesmen were
J. U. Breckenrldge and Secretary Chase. As
'Judge Ewing and my informant were strolling
through the town after supper, they happened
to see Secretary Chase with bis daughter, Mrs.
Sprague, on the porch of the hotel. Jndge
Ewing (wbo was then, I should have said, plain
Mr. Ewing) went up to Secretary Cbase and
made himself known, and then introduced his
friend. A very interesting conversation ensued
which might well be given here, if space per
mitted. Jndge Ewing'aviewq were then hardly
what they are to-day on politics. The great
oratorical contest of Ulluols between Abraham
Lincoln and Douglas was the principal subject
of that conversation. As Jndge Ewing and his
friend walked away, the former remarked that
he thought that Chase's health was falling, for
his upper jaw seemed to be dropping, and other
signs indicative of paralysis, seemed to be
plainly present Nobody else at that time had
any fear about Secretary Chase's health. A few
weeks later tbe first stroke of paralysis, which
was tbe beginning of a series, overcame Secre
tary Chase and he died soon after.
I think this shows that Mr. Ewing at that
time possessed in some measure the powers
upon which I have remarked.
During tho hail storm on Friday afternoon
a fish dealer on Wylie avenue, observing that
many people thereabouts were on tbe lookout
for large hailstones, took a large cake of ice,
and proceeding to an upper chamber, be
chopped up the ice into blocks about tho Bize
of a man's hand, and then proceeded to throw
them out one by one from the window. The
spectators who thronged the doorways made fc
mad rush for what they imagined were im
mense hailstones. Last night Wylie avenue
was ringing with the report ot this extraordi
nary fall of hail; but to-day there is nothing
heard but the laughter of that very wicked
dealer.
.
It seems rather curious that witnesses should
have been called to testify to Superintendent
Starr of the Ft Wayne Railroad's character.
Surely nobody for a moment supposes that he
subscribed willingly to that terrible accident
on Federal stredt Mr. Starr's sojourn is the
Criminal Court has been deeply regretted by
Sewickley society, of which he is quito a promi
nent member. He lives In a very pretty house
on that beautiful terrace between Roseburg
and Quaker Valley.
V
HAT'S A CRADLE.
Winter tries to keep us tame,
Chains us with her fetters chill;
Dear desire's a little lame,
When the snow Is on the sill.
Winds of winter seem to kill
Tender hopes; we plan In vain.
There's no moving onward till
Lol in May we're born again 1
Borne there are who sigh for fame,
Start to climb he rocky hill;
Others take to Cupid's game,
Sparks from Hymen's altars spill.
Poets drive the ardent quill,
For to teU us they are fain
AH tbe thoughts that through them thrill.
Lot in ilay we're bprn again!
May deserves tbe sweetest name,
Let us praise her with a will:
bhe's a damsel, not a dame;
Come to charm, and not to drill
Flowers are her fairy frill.
Worship her in nature's fane,
Where the birds in rapture trill;
Lot in liar we're born again!
Some there be who idly claim
May's a month of subtle ill
Since then Cupid doth inflame
Oft the hearts of Jack and Jill;
That .Hay's blossoms swcetl Instil
Thoughts oflove-HIs surely tain.
uove's a sugar-coatea DM
Lot In May -we're born again
t
ENVqi.
Laughs the red blood like a
Aslt Ieana from reio ta-Trtn
. Join the dance and banc the h
' ' 'Lollh Hay we're born again!
A FAST kill gf EY1CI.
To bo Put on Between the Pacific Coast and
tbe East To. Day. '
Chicago, May IL Commencing Sunday, tbe
Southern and Union Pacific Railroads will put
on two extra trains, one westbound and the
other eastbound, both of them being limited.
In addition to these, the roads running between
Chicago and the Missouri river will have short
ened up tho time on their Eastern trams, so
that after May 12 mails dispatched from Cali
fornia, Nevada, Utah, Oregon, Washington,
Idaho, part of "Montana, Colorado, Wyoming
and part of Nebraska for Chicago, New York
City, New England and Pennsylvania will be
delivered In Chicago 23 hours and 20 minutes
earlier than at present New York will be
reached 20 hours earlier than formerly and Bos
ton 21 hours and thirty-five minutes earlier, with
a corresponding gain for all New England
points, Pennsylvania and New Jersey.
The postal cars will leave on the fast train
leaving San Francisco at 630 P.M., arrive in
Chicago at 11:59 a. m. ot the fifth day, and in
New York at 730 p.m., and in Boston at 10.30
p. 11. of the sixth day, making a gain of one
business day between Boston and San Fran
cisco. Tho change will compel the exployes of
the postofflce hero to work all day Sunday, and
will greatly increase tbe labor of the carriers,
but the public will be benefited by the
change.
AGAIHST THE IMPORTERS.
Collector Erhnrdt Gives His Decision In tho
Worsted Goods' Controversy.
New Yob, MaylL-CoUectorErhardt this
afternoon decided a dispute of long standing'
between New York customs authorities and
merchants. The decision involves nearly 81,
500,000 annually and is the result of several In
vestigations. Invoices of manufactured worsted
goods have been found by tbe appraiser to con.
tain large quantities of wool, and havo there
fore been appraised under section 862 of the
tariff law, which calls for a duty of 35 cents per
pound and 35 per cent ad valorem on all woolen
goods under the value of 10 cents per pound.
The importers claimed the goods contained
only "combed" wool and should come in under
a section classifying "blankets, wool hats and
all goods made on knitting frames" and calling
for a duty of from 10 to IS cents per pound on
goods wbrth from 30 to 80 cents.
Two invoices brought by the City of Paris and
Umbria from the basis of the decision, which
isadersetotbe importers, Collector Erbarat
notified tbe importers that they might appeal
to the Secretory ot the Treasury.
THREE APPOINTMENTS PIXED,
A Trio of tho Auditors of tho Treasury to
be Supplanted.
Washington, May IL At the conference
between the President and Secretary Windom
Thursday last three gentlemen were selected
for appointments as Andltdrs of the Treasury.
It was not settled, however, whose places they
should take. There are five audltorshlps
available, tbe incumbents having resigned.
Tbe positions most likely to be filled first are
tbe First Fourth and Fifth Auditors, now
held respectively by Messrs. Chenowith, Shel
ley and Rickhoff.
The latter has been appointed Fire Commis
sioner In New York City, and left here last
evening to assume the duties Of that office.
Third Auditor Williams has strong influence,
and probably will be tbe last of the Democratic
auditors to be disturbed.
COMING TO THE FRONT,
The Chesapeake and Ohio Havo an Elegant
Now Thronsb Train.
Cincinnati, May IL. Beginning to-night
the Chesapeake and Ohio Railroad puts on its
new train called the "Fast Flying Virginian,"
which is composed of coaches built by the
Pullman Company in the most approved style.
Tbe train will leave Cincinnati at 6.30 p. H,
and go through solid to New York, via Wash
ington. Baltimore and Philadelphia, using the
Virginia Midland road from. Charlottesville to
Alexandria and tbe Pennsylvania line from
there to New York.
The train Is equinped with drainer room car
and sleeper. The cars have electric lights. A
postal service is to be organized over this line
in a few days.
BUTLER AND P0ETEE.
Wheeling Intelligencer: Publie sentiment
is likely to side with Porter, as all the donbt is
in his favor. Cowards do not usually rise from
the lowest office in tbe navy to become Its high
est commander-
Minneapolis Journal: General Ben Butler
and Admiral Porter are displaying indications
of second childhood. Probably both of them
"would reient,the insinuation that they are too
old to fight with anything bnt tbeir mouths, r
Brooklyn Citizen: Butler is never more in
his element than when swashlngabout in a bog
of abuse. He is the typical American Ther
sites a worthless fellow with a foul tongue. It
is unnecessary to add that Admiral Porter
proves Butler to be a rank liar.
Tsar Times: Army and navy-men join Ad
miral Porter In refuting Ben Butler's charge
that Mr. Porter was guilty of. cowardly be
havior at the siege of New Orleans. Ben seems
to have slopped over again, without any reason
for it in his usual reckless and rickety way.
Philadelphia Bulletin: Admiral Porter
and General Butler are calling each other very
bad names. To bottle Porter is not anew
business for a Butler, but General Grant once
described General Butler as bottled up at
Dutch Gap and the Admiral may repeat the
process.
New Yobe TTorW: Benjamin F. Butler
failed to establish himself as a military genius
during the war. Perhaps he ean add to his
laurels by questioning tbe courage now of men
who served the cause ot the union with fidelity -and
whose records are not stained by deeds of
oppression, rapacity or greed.
Albany Express: It may be fun for the
squabblers, but tbe people do not relish tho
spectacle of these two veterans each doing his
utmost to smirch the other's character and
reputation. Of course nobody thinks of be
lieving Benny, but it is generally supposed that
the Admiral has a good name to lose.
Diplomacy at (he Samoan Conference,
From the Chicago Times.
- The Samoan Commissioners are getting down
to business. They have dined. When Count
Herbert Bismarck asked William Walter
Phelps if he would have mustard on his cheese
sandwich, Mr. Phelps replied, "Out." But
seeing the bad break ho had made quickly
rubbed it out and said: "Yaw, meinheer," and
all went merry as a marriage bell.
Silence a Great Virtue.
From the St. Paul Pioneer Press.
Keep your eye on Grover Cleveland. He is
still in the ring. He is still better than his
party stiller and better.
. SPUING 8DITS.
to zelie de LTTSSAN.
Acsoss tbe deep and boundless sea
AVU1 sail a maid for London's quay.
Her songs she sings quite like a bird, ,
They're the sweetest we have ever heard,
And we'll miss them much.
Will she return to us again.
Or will a title win this wren?
To keep her in that strange domain
Where iu aU glory she might reign
As docs a Queen.
Pheesy tyere you at the Opera House last
'Fatty No: it was too hot
Pbcrsy-I went.
Fatty Well, did you Wlltr
Geoege Bhieas' HI. (Im) peach crop was a
faUure.
The strawberry festival will soon be at hand,
And as usual they'll fall to wash all the sand
From the berry.
But that don't matter, for those who attend
Are a class who little money wUI spend,
And what is required is Just now saud,
To develop In patrons a liberal hand
PniLADELrniAN Doctor, I believe I am
suffering from nervous prostration.
Doctor (after making examination) Yes, your
nerves are completely shattered, and it is all due
to excitement.
Phlladelphlan That is what I thought, doctor.
Yon know I played a game of checkers last night,
and this morning took part in a game of croquet
Oh, 1 can't stand exclttment.
Nowadays the popular fad with newly
married couples Is to go and live with the, bride's
parents. For reasons, apply to the groom;
JJON the lightest salt you've got
Likewise change your underwear,
JSboqt yourdcrbr for a chip one;
And have your barber cat yourhair.
For the mercury U'away up.
And one's collar melteth down:
"'TIs the time, when to the country, .
People ekefrM the. lows. - 1
SMlJ. SI.
A IAD EXPLOIT,
How Captain Porter, Sen of the Adariral,
Sooted Maximilian's Forces Posted as
a Deserter An Adventure la Egypt.
rSrSCIAL TELSORAHTO TBI DISPATC3.1
Washington, D.C May IL "By the way,
speaking of Admiral Porter, did you ever hear
of , the exploit of his son, Captain D. Essex Por
ter, down on the Bio Grande, just after the
war?" '
The speaker was an old army officer, and we
had been talkinz of the quarrel between Ad
miral Porter and General Butler.
"I bare never seen It in print," continued the
officer, "and it is too good to lose. I think it
was suppressed on account of the high family
connections of the young man, but there is no
doubt of its truth, and as Mr. Porter is nqw
practicing law in tbe city, you can go to him
and verify what I tell yon.
"It was at the" time when Maximilian was
playing his fatal farce in Mexico. Captain
Porter had a well-equipped company of artil
lery under his command, and at the same sta
tion on the R' Grande was Colonel Sedgwick,
in command of a comcanv of cavalrv. Sedg
wick; you know, is the envoy who was sent to
Mexico by Cleveland to look into the diplo
matic complications there, and against whom
it was charged that he attended a masked ball,
got drunk and conducted himself in a very un
becoming manner.
A Soldier of Fortune.
"The station was near tbe town of Matamoras,
and one evening a Mexican officer came in
great excitement into the camp and offered
Porter a large amount in gold, and liberal pay
for his men, if be would cross the river that,
night and assist the Mexicans to route the
forces ot Maximilian, who bad just Invested
the city and was threatening to destroy it
Porter consulted with Sedgwick. Both of them
were dare-devil fellows at that time, who chafed
at their being compelled to rust with inaction,
after tbe excitement of the great war, and
they concluded to engage in tbe excursion.
Very quietly tbe men were got under arms and
in the dead of night they crossed the river and
with muffled steps approached the city and the
forces of the ambitious Maximilian. So com
plete had been the victory of the invad
ers, and so contemptible tbe opposi
tion of tbe Mexicans, that few precautions
bad 'been taken against surprise, and the
Americans were upon them before tbeir pres
ence was suspected. The artillery burled death
into tbe surprised foreigners, and tbe cavalry
made a reckless charge into their very midst
In a few moments tbe invaders were on the
dead run. They could not know what was tbe
new force against them, ahd the attack was so
fierce and bo well planned that It was evident
to the whole camp that a trained and courage
ous enemy bad dropped down upon them as
tnougn irom me ciouas. rne rout was com
plete. The foreigners ran like sheep. But the
Americans, flushed with victory, and desiring
to fully earn their liberal reward, pursued tbe
fleeing troops for several days, chasing them so
far away that it was improbable Matamoras
wonld ever again be trdubledwith their pres
ence. Charged With Desertion.
"Returning leisurely they again reached Mat
amoras. The two officers dropped into a publio
house to refresh themselves, and there received
a shock that was little less demoralizing than
that which they had given to the men ot Maxi
milian. Throwing back their heads to toss off
glasres of aguardiente, their cups were arrested
midway to their lips. There on the wall before
them was a placard describing tbe two gentle
men, and offering a large reward for tbeir ap
prehension, dead or alive, for the crime of
having deserted from the army of the United
States. They were recognized by tbe keeper
01 ice nouse, wco naa Deen in tne mates ana
could speak English, and this worthy informed
them that many citizens ot tbe town were on
tbe lookout for them for the purpose of getting
the reward, and that If it were known they were
within reach tbey would be certainly captured
and perhaps killed.
"Even while they were speaking aleading man
of tbe place entered the room and began to scan
them keenly. Porter coolly eyed him In turn,
introduced himself and Sedgwick by fictitious
names, aud begged the Mexican to do them the
honor to take a drink with them. Ho accepted,
but did not cease his suspicions glances, andthe
landlord warned them in English that It was
evident to him their identity was known to the
Mexican, and that they had better fly for their
lives. They lost no time In acting on his sug
gestion, when the Mexican left their company,
as it afterward appeared, with the purpose of
securing assistance to place tbem under arrest
It was but a few moments after they bad Start
ed hurriedly on the road to' overtake their
troops when they found they were pursued.
They took to their heels Ingloriously, a crowd'
ot eager Mexicans uncomfortably close on the
scent, but tbey managed to reach their com
mands, and there defied theirpursners by train
ing a Gatllng gun upon them, and informing
tbem that tbey would blow them to pieces if
they did not immediately make tracks for the
town,
A Shrewd Talker.
"But they were not yet out of their scrape.
They were well aware that they had been post
ed as aeserters.and that they would find it dif
ficult to explain their conduct satisfactorily.
They did not return, therefore, to their former
encampment but marched far up the river to
tbe heart of the wilderness, and reported from
there to the superior officer wbo had ordered
tbeir arrest that they had changed their base
on information that hostlles were abont to
cross the river from Mexican soil at this point
I believe, however, tbey were relieved of their
commands and ordered to Washington to give
personal explanation of their actions. At any
rate, tbey came here for that purpose. They
were referred sternly from one officer to an
other, and finally to President Johnson. Their
commander in chief coldly expressed his regret
at finding them involved in so serious a compli
cation, and wanted to know what they could
say to soften judgment against tbem.
"Porter acted as tbe spokesman, and reeled
off, with the most brazen sang frotd, an elo-
Suentyarn, which was, in brief, that they bad
lformation that tbe army of Maximilian had
formed a plan to cross the rirer, capture their
men, artillery, horses and supplies, for tbe pur
pose of using them against the Mexicans. The
situation was of the utmost gravity, and tbey
concluded it was. imperative that they should
take the surest plan to save the men and prop
erty of tbe United States from falling into tbe
band of a foreign invader, whose very pres
ence, to put upon it the best complexion, was
an insult to every true American, and wbo had
set oat to make a conquest of Mexico in de
fiance of the Monroe doctrine and of the spirit
of the institutions of the Republic ot the
United States.
"President Johnson listened with stern coun
tenance to this extraordinary harangue, but it
was just possible to detect a twinkle in his eye
that showed he appreciated tbe humor as well
as tho gravity of the' affair, and after a severe
lecture, in which he descanted on the danger
of tbeir conduct to the peace between the
United States and hitherto friendly European
power, he dismissed them and their case.
A Brave Soldier.
"Porter resigned from tho army a short time
after that, 1 believe; at any rate, he went to
Egypt and entered the army of the Khedive as
a high officer at a time when several other
young and adventurous American officers did
the same thing. Possibly he merely got in
definite leave of absence! Once while there he
narrowly escaped capture and death. He'took
out a small scouting party ot Egyptians and
penetrated far into the wilderness. Suddenly
tbey were set upon by Abyssinlans lurking in
the bushes. His companions ran away, aud be
faced a score or so of the enemy alone. Killing
tho man nearest to bim with his revolver, he
took to his heels, distanced his nursuers and
got into camp safely. He reported a large body
01 tne enemy omy a iew mues away, ana urged
that the army bo put in fighting position with
out delay.
"The Egyptian commander refused to be
lieve the story and did nothing. That night
they were surprised by the Abyssinlans, utterly
routed, several thousand of their men taken
prisoners and put to death with the most hor
rible tortures. All of the Americans got
away. At a point where they halted tbey could
hear the awful cries of the prisoners as they
were mutilated and solemnly congratulated
each other that for tbe timo at least tbey were
spared that terrible late. They had arranged,
however, that if anyone of them was wounded
so as to be unable to escape he should be killed
by one of his countrymen and not permitted to
fall into the hands of the savage enemy. I
don't know anything personally of the matter
about which Admiral Porter and General But
ler are disputing, but I do know there is not a
cowardly fiber in tbe composition of this ad
venturous son of the Admiral, who has for
saken military life for the law.'' E. W. L
Easier to Say Than to Do.
From the uctrolt Free Press.)
Prof. Paul D'Nuce, whoever he is. says he
can cause a thunder storm and a fall of rain in
any district on two hours' notice, and that he
can hare the shower stop in 15 minutes or con
tinue bait a day. Bielnjunl
Too Styllsh-for Texas.
From the Detroit Free PreM.1
The Governor of Texas has put up six f un
sized wire window screens at his mansion, and
it will bo no use for blm to hope for a second
term. Tho country elector says such extrava
gance must be rebuked.
A Poet's Modest Ambition.
From tbe Chicago Tribune.
' Emil Dletzscb, the poet, is a candidate for
the-posities of C4ewiffariM Iotjiectorfer
minoi. : r -
MW 19U KIWS KOTIS,
Saved Three -Men From Drewaias.
UntW YORK BUBXAU SPECIALS.
New Yoek; May lL-Jack Elliott, a pro
f essioB&l pugilist, saved three men from drown
ing near Pelham bridge, during the storm last
night. The first breath of tbe squall upset the
boat from which the men were fishing in the
bay. None of tbem could swim. Elliott swam
ont to them and got two of them back to the
boat without difficulty. The third man, how
ever, clung to him so tenaciously that he could
move neither bands nor feet He dragged
Elliott under twice. As he was pulling him
down the third time, a boy wbo had followed
Elliott in a boat fished thea both out of tho
water.
Has to Pay 81S,eee for a Leg.
Thomas Murray was thrown from the front
platform of a Brooklyn surface car, while he
was trying to pass the conductor a nickel
through the slot in the door. He fell under
tbe car. A wheel passed over his left leg and
crushed it so badly that amputation was neces
sary. He sued the Brooklyn City Railway, the
owner of the car, for 825,00a To-day the jury
awarded him $13,000.
Death of a Man With a Careen ,
Mike Henry died In theFlatbush Insane
Asylum late last night He had been one of
tho most prominent figures in Brooklyn sport
ing life for 30 years. He made his debut among
sporting men as director of the old Atlantic
Baseball Club, which played on the site of tbe
new Brooklyn City Hall. He' seconded and
backed SamCollyerln his famous fight -with
Johnny McGlade, at Wllkesbarre. -He trained
Johnny Dwyer for bis flght with Jimmy El
liott, and coached 'Madame Anderson in her
great walk at Mozart Garden, when she accom
plished 1,000 miles in LOOO hours. He had had
all sorts of hairbreadth escapes from death be
fore he was shut up in tbe asylum. He was
shot twice, stabbed once, and bad his throat cut
almost from ear to ear by a crazy 'longshore-mar-
He was a political "worker" ot influence,
and for some time a member ot the General
Democratic Committee. He started in life
without a cent, got $200,000 in some mysterious
fashion, and lost it all as mysteriously as he got
it About every man in Brooklyn knew him as
"Gallus Mike." He was taken to tbe asylum
just one year ago to-day.
Called On by Ben or Jimmy.
John J. O'Brien, Republican boss ot the no
torious Eighth district, the storm center ot
almost ail local post-election squabbles, has
been a hero to-day among city politicians. Mr.
O'Brien has been in Albany most of the week
pulling legislative wires. Last night be got a
message from Washington, which brongbt him
back to New York in post baste, He stopped
long enough to get a clean shirt, and then
started for Washington. O'Brien's followers
think that the summons was a letter from
President Harrison. Jim MacManus, Mr.
O'Brien's first lieutenant knows better. He
says be saw the letter, and that it was signed
by James G. Blaine.
PENNSYLVANIA PRODUCTS,
Fraz-FiSBTiro for catfish is a picturesque
recreation along Chester county streams these
nichts.
A valuable horse of Lorenzo Hartzell, of
Stone Church, Lehigh county, was stung by
bees the otber day and was dead in 20 minutes.
James B. Murphy, of Philadelphia, an in
mate of the Soldiers and Sailors' Home at
Erie, has built a tugboat, 25 inches long, which
is perfect in model.
Harey. an old horse at Linden Hall, Lltitz,
unmindful of his 23 years, attempted to gambol
the other day. and slipped and fell and broke
his back. He was shot
An Erie paper says that bythe useof natural
gas clay for bricks can be taken from the hill
side, iun through a machine, drled-and stacked
in 24 hours. The old way took a week.
As soon as the Burgess of Miner's Mills had
married a couple the groom was missing, but
returned directly with a quart of peanuts. A
trail of shells up North Maid street indicated
the direction of the wedding tour.
Two Newberry young ladles, who are sisters,
were Informed that lemon juice will remove
freckles. They applied It liberally. The juice
took the freckles off, and tbe skin too, and the
girls now go aronnd with tbeir heads swathed
in bandages.
Charles Reilly, a veteran hunter of VJXti
county, killed three bears on Thursday. He
was armed only with an ax, when a big bear
and two well-grown cubs attacked him. He
had nearly all his clothes torn off, but came out
victorious, though, covered with scratches and
blood. The old bear weighed 400 and the cubs
200 pounds each.
An Erie man named Harty, arrested for hav
ing struck his sl3ter-ln-law, has been fined 25
cents and costs; and only a couple of weeks ago
a Butler county man was fined 0 cents in good
hard caib for simply whipping his mother-in-law.
What right has the measly law to throw
cold water in this manner on tbe frolicsome
moods of man, cutting off the jolly diversions
which might enliven many an otherwise dreary
hour? It will soon be that a man can hare no
fnn at all Oil City Blizzard.
TEIAL OP A NEW ENGINE.
It Is Gnarentessi to Pall 15 Coaches at 60
Miles an Hoar.
Chicago, May 11. To-morrow at 11:15 a new
engine, built at Schenectady for the Chicago,
Milwaukee and St Paul, will make a trial trip. It
is guaranteed to draw a train of 15 heavy pas
senger coaches at the rate of 60 miles an honr.
In case of failure, tbe builders are to forfeit
half of its price. v
Incase ft makes the speed stipulated, it and
others like it are to be used upon all of tbe
limited trains on the road. The engine is of
the Mogul consolidated style, with six drive
wheels, 5 feet 9 Inches in diameter, and weighs
80 tons.
Blerelr a News Item.
From the Chicago Tribune. J
A young girl in Philadelphia nearly lost her
life a fey days ago in consequence of heart
disease and congestion of the brain brought on
by tight lacing. The item is given merely as a
matter of news and wltbont any hope that the
warning ifconveys will be heeded..
Dandelions Its a Diet.
From the Inter-Ocean. 1
Cooking dandelions in a frying pan with a
little -water and a thin slice of bacon is the
latest recommended way for making a, health
ful spring dish. Presently people will follow
Gulliver's plan and extract sunshine from
cucumbers.
Nothing for the Poor Worms.
From the Chicago News.
It is understood tbatSecretary Ruskis highly
Indignant because $100,000 was lately divided
among the militia of this country and he was
not permitted to have any of It for the benefit
of the army worms which are under his super
vision. Sir. Roosevelt Accepts.
Washington, May U. Mr. Theodore
Roosevelt of New York, appointed a member
of the Civil Service Commission, has written to
the Secretary of the commission stating that
he will accept the place on the commission.
Tbe oath of offlce will be administered on
Monday.
s
Celebrating an Important Anniversary.
Newport, R. L, May IL The two hundred
and fiftieth anniversary of the settlement of
Newport was observed quietly to-day by the
decoration of public buildings and a meeting
of tbe Historical Society, with historical ad
dresses by prominent citizens to-night
A Little illoney Still In the Trensnry.
New Yonif, May IL The count of the
money In the sub-Treasury was concluded yes
terday, ana tbe money found to correspond
with the statement made by the late Acting
Assistant Treasurer on April 13. Tbe amount
found to be in the Treasury was $178,384,743 75.
Good Men Gone Wrong.
From tbe Washington Post
The closing scenes of the Pennsylvania Legis
lature only clinched our belief that the noble
profession of minstrelsy is being annually
robbed of useful talent by the people who elect
our statesmen.
Miracles In Keatacky.
From the Baltimore American.
There are two miracles wbiefa tbe average
Kentuckian cannot explain-the present over
prodnesiea of whisky ad Th wsfe j's defeat of
Proctor Khb'R in tho XmIm!? Serby..
CBMOUS C05PESSATMS,
The people, of Adams county, Ohlo
think they have discovered valuable gold oro'
in the hiui of Jsiewes township. ---
A man in Agusta, Me., in paying a
bill deducted 2 cents for the stamp on tho
letter in which he seat his remittance.
One of the clauses of an Augusta, Me.,
woman's will read: "I want tobeberredat
East Beadfleld, beside my father and mother,
and a headstone."
Two Oil City policemen and divers other
persons shot a stray dog the other evening, and
the next morning the dog was able to eat a
pound and a half of beefsteak.
A. curious fact in natural history comes
from Fairlie, Scotland. A hen, after hatching
several chickens, died: thereupon a cat took
charge of the brood, and has since remained
their jealous guardian.
The town of Hyatfsville, Md, which
elbows historic old Bladensburg; is going to put
Henry George's single tax theory to a practical
test It was made the issue In the recent local
election, and three Town Commissioners who
weie chosen are converts to the idea.
A. W. Home, of Greenland, Me., re
cently fired into a corey of wild ducks, on
Green Bay, killing nine and disabling four at
the first fire. The three survivors started
rapidly away, but Home .fired again, and two
more of the birds feU. Only one of the 18
escaped.
A gentleman over 45 years of age, who
was born and has always lived nearHartwell,
Ga.,has never rode on the cars nor seen a
river. He has a good pair ot eyes, and Is an In
telligent and industrious farmer. Tbe Savannah
river is not more than seven miles from his
residence.
There are two idle superstitions about
cramps that come in the legs, and start a man
out of his bed quicker than anything else. One
is to stick a jackknif e in the headboard ot a
bed on retiring for the night and the otber is
to arrange the slippers very carefully, bottom
up, at the foot ot tbe bed.
A. Dnluth man wants to encourage mat
rimony. A strike atA.ll Cox's broom factory
was settled bythe proprietor increasing the
wages of all his married employes and giving
the single men notice that they wonld not be
wanted after the end of the month, unless tbey
were married by that time, in whicn event they
would ba retained at an increased salary.
An Austin inventor has devised a steel
corn husker, which, drawn by a team, picks and
husks the corn at the rate of 8 to 12 acres a day,
according to the capacity of the team. The
team ana machine more astride tbe row; one
horse on each side, and every ear of corn, large
or small is picked up. Corn husking can now
be done jut as threshing is, lasting but a "few
days.
A novel way of selecting a nominee for
postmaster has been agreed upon bythe dozen
aspirants at Little Valley, N. Y. The names
of 75 Republicans are to be taken from the re
vised Republican poll list and placed in a bat
Twenry-flre are to belrawn. These, together
with one delegate for each aspirant are to con
stitute a committee of the whole. This com
mittee are to ballot upon tbe applications and
decide the light.
Notwithstanding the continuous thun
der on the elevated railroads in New York, tho
bold sparrows are busy building tbeir nests be
tween its crossbeams and roadway, right under
the reverberating trains. In that part of the
Union Elevated Railroad nearest the Thir
teenth Precinct station, those birds are build
ing by the hundred. When weary from work
they come down to the fountain iu front of the
station, take a drink and a bath, and flock back
to their labors refreshed;
An Alabama man, charged with steal
ing a calf, made the following statement: "I
was always teached to be honest, an most al
ways bare been, but when I seed tbe calf 1
cared. I never wanted a calf so bad in all my
life, an' yon all know that when a man wants a
calf he wants him." The jury returned the
following verdict: "We, this jury, are satisfied
that Steve stold the calf, but, as the feller that
owned the animal is considerable of a slouch,
we agree to clear Steve and make the slouch
pay the costs."
During the peanut harvest in the South
everybody, from pigs to people, gets fat They
are not known there as peanuts, bat as goober
peas, and a raid Into a goober patch has about
it all the delight of a watermelon raid. It is
related that a Southern gentleman catching
two small black children among bis goober
vines, called them by way of punishment
uooDerxananauoooerJonn. iae noys. how
ever, living to be proud of It adopted it as tbeir
lamlly surname, and to this day the descend- v
ants are known as the Goobers.
Old ocean pilots and sea-coin tr neonlo -Fv
"Vfco rfaichcdthe-school of devU fish, "that ,
played about the pilot boats and the tug Cyn- J
thia before the boats got off in a recent regatta
at Charleston, S. C. say that such a sight is
very rare in the life of a mariner. Tbey played
abont the crag for tolly halt an hour, and
were principally yonng devil flsb. from four
feet long to six feet, and they looked like t
great bats. Some of them bad shed their tails '
while others had caudal appendages fully a -,
yard in length. As many as 20 of these hide
ous looking marine curiosities were seen at
one time, and one was shot by one ot the crew
of the Neca, and atter lashing the waters of
the sound into a foam it sank out of sin ht
A German traveler has discovered the
very smallest Republic in Europe. The honor,
which was claimed for Gersau until it was
absorbed in the Canton, seems to belong in
contestably to tne Independent hamlet of
Goust This petty group of huts, situated a
few hours' distance from Oleron, In the;depart
ment of the Lower Pyrenees, belongs neither
to France nor Bpain. It has somewhat over
100 citizens, Roman Catholics in religion, who
lire by silk weaving, and constitute a brave
and self-dependent commonwealth. They have .
no taxes nor any other publio charges. They
have no Mayor or other civil official. Tbey
have not even an established church or priest
of their own, but attend at a neighboring
village. Their very language, an amalgam of
French and Spanish, is spoken-only in their
little land and scarcely understood elsewhere.
WHAT WILD WITS ARE SAYING.
A man never opens a box of chewing to
bacco with a corkscrew; be simply pulls the plug
ont with his &nitn. aMngton Critic.
Minister Will you take this man to be
your lawfully wedded husband? ,
Omaha Belle If you please. Omaha World.
Some old dinner Customs still prevail.
The Romans used to recline at their banquets, and
the habit of lying at publio dinners is common
BtOU London Tit-Sits.
Philosophy. Servant Oh, please, sir,
your daughter has eloped with the coachman.
Mr. Highllver Well, It might have been worse.
She might have run off with my French cook.
Ntv Tort Weekly.
A Politician's View. Flynn So Gineral
Washington nivertould a lie, be didn't eh?
Marks o, never.
Flynn How did be ever get elected, I'd like to
know J Terrs Haute Express.
An old lady in Vermont who had been
maintained for years by charitable acquaint
ances, but wal about to be taken to the Poor;
House, feU heir last week to 30,000. Old ladles
received on subscription at this office. Oil City
JHiuard.
Nothing New. Adorer (nervously)
Isn't that your father's steo on the stairs 7
Sweet Girl-Yes, but don't mind that; it's only
a scare. He won't come down. He always
stamps around that way when I sit up with
young men after II o'elocr. JTew York Weekly ;7
Not a Novelty. "John, Mr. Jacksoa
has bought a phonograph. '
"Is that so?"
"Yes. Ton ought to see It It repeats every
thing that' s told to It "
' 'I don' t see ho w Edison got a patent on it. "
"Why not?"
' 'Because it's no lmnrovement on vou women."
Chicago Herald.
The First Reader. "Does the man jaw.?"
"He does. He says tbe grocer ought to be sent
to State Prison."
"What has the grocer done J"
"Gave him IS ounces for a pound."
" UJut tnat was very wrong. "
' So it was ; but the grocer knew to whom he was.
seuing."
"Who is the man ?'
"He Is the inventor of the peck peach basketj
which hold only six quarts. He laughs and
grows fat when he thinks of it hut when someone
tries a trick on him It 1j a horse or another
color. "-Detroit Free Press.
SXASOXABLX SYMPTOMS.
In the spring all nature bubbles with an ef
fervescing glee.
From the bull frogs in the meadow to the robins la
the tree. '
In the spring the Jaunty tourist strolls about for
rustle SnM-
Whlle the maiden and her lover scour the distant w
, lots for greens.
In the sprliig the roaring freshet makes sad havoc
With the hsnka. -,'
And tbe public parks and gardens blossom out
with dudes and cranks. J'
In tbe spring the postman tarries for the lovers',
"extra stamps," -, "-
Ad tbe Bild that strolled by moonlight stays 1
1 bed ext day wltn cramps. , at ,
11. a. Awmmg mm.
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