seS- pPTf 1 PACET9 TO fc. "H -H : H1 :SECOHD PART. s. C-- BILL flYE AS A HOST. He Formulates a Series of Enles for Guests at a Model Hotel. A SEARCH FOE A PAIR OF SOGKS. Some Pleasant and Peculiar Features of the Inauguration. STRAIGHT TIP TO FUTURE PEESIDENTS lujuiTcr ron the bispatcili Washe-gtos, D. C.f in the Midst of Much, 1889. HE other day I saw the black slippers of Lady "Washington in the red South Church in Boston. They are made of -satin or silk, to T&slq or faille francaise or 88a cheese cloth, or some of those rich fabrics, and have high slender heels. .They are not -what could be called common Isense shoes. They seem to lack that com pound more than anything else. They are i good style of Bhoe for a lady to extend in a nonchalant way from the folds of her dress while conversing with a person of keen dis crimination, bnt they are poor things for reanng purposes. I could not well help contrasting the com , fort and the cost of clothing in the old times with the comfort and cost of snch things of to-day. For instance, a Continental hat cost $15, which was the salary of a pretty hefty official in those days for a month. To be sure, the hat would last for a year or'two and look almost as tough at the end of that time as it did at first, but we do not care to wear clothes forever. If we do, they finally obtain an individuality of their own which renders them objectionable to people who might be otherwise friendly. I also had a good chance to note with much interest the diflerence between the elaborate costume worn by General Salli van and that affected by the . gentle, genial land urbane John. The General must have looked like an inflamed and acgravated case of crazy quilt, while the younger Sul- i livan, as I have seen him, wore a pair of swollen mittens and a heavy trown. Tarther on might have been seen the costly three-cornered hat worn by General Stark, together with "a small quantity of , coagulated perspiration shed by him while fighting for freedom. HIS FEELIKGS HUET. I always go and visit the old South Church when in Boston, because I like to sec the old aud pleasant cannon balls with which disagreeable people were killed when they acted improperly. I also like to at tend a church where I can criticise things without hurting anyone's feelings. After I visit the old church I like to go around over the Hub and buy things. I bate to con trast any city with my own town, but a 'nervous person with a shrinking nature can do better and enjoy it better while shopping in Boston than in New York. The Boston mer evidently bought his goods for the purpose of selling them to the ron- Jfje Purchasing One Pair of Socks Ho. 10. Burner, while the 2? ew York merchant ap pears to have purchased them more for the wild excitement of looking at them himself. 1 always have my feelings hurt when I shop in New York. In the first place, I am en raged before I get to the store by 087,230 people who knock meoer and get on the elevated trains before the passengers can get off. Then I go to a store and wait near a stacks wet umbrellas until several total strangers with a haughty air jostle me against the wall. I next speak to a floor walker, who plays that he owns the store, and is allowed to draw that instead of a sal ary. He looks at me askance, as ii he feared that I might be Nellie Bly. He goes over to confer with a heavy-set saleslady, to in quire of her, evidently, whether I am there with sinister motives, and while I tremble at the thought that I am about to be searched for said motives, another mac, who plays that he owns the store afternoons, comes along and asks me what I want there. SIlirLE-MCfDED 2TTE. I tell him that I am a simple-minded man, more or less picked on both at home and abroad; that I Would spend an enormous amount of money in If ew York, if I had a chance; that to-day I had contemplated buying or trading for a full set of two heavy No. 10 English hose with double soles and a striking resemblance to each other. No body could be any more explicit than that without being offensive. I "just tell a man what I want right at the start, and then if there should be any delay it is his fault. He looks at me sorrowfully and begins to feel in his pocket tor something. T say, "Put up Tour gold. Get out with your cross. I am not poor or crazed by suffering. I am only waiting to present a letter of in troduction to the sock lady if I can obtain an audience with her. I would be satisfied with even"a very small audience with her." He tells me where the ofHce is, and I go there. She waits a long time before I seem tq catch her eye. She looks through me, and so on across the store to a given point. She then says: Well?" "Sockys!" "Yes?" x "YesI" "What kind, please?" "English hose, double sole, unbleached, No. 10, two of a kind." "Fer yourself?" "Yes, exclusively for myself." "Well, the men's hose is on the sec ond floor, facing the other street" I then go to a hotel, register, get a room, ring for a messenger and send him for the hose. It may be thesame old crazy spirit which keeps Ni.w York stirred up all the time and makes the average New Yorker miserable all day if lie misses a car, even if the next will be along in half a minute; bnt what ever it is, it is an evil spirit and makes money for a few people to the discomfort of a great many. New York shopping, especially at certain seasons and on certain days, is. like trying to buy things in Washington durinsthe in auguration. You can payfor tbem.but you are not permitted to takejthem away. They may be needed four years from now. OKESXT'S MISTAKE. The inauguration is- no longer news,, but it may be looked back upon with great i cnv ja tjiii i: xir W" 'ill pleasure, especially by those who remained at home. I attended because I had to do so. People expected it, and so I went, but tuture Presidents will have to get along without me, and they might as well under stand it before they go to the expense and annoyance of getting elected. Probably 5500,000 worth of silk hats bit the dust, so to speak, on the 4th of this month at this place. Think of that alone. "Half a million dollars worth of sorrowing silk hats with side whiskers on them, arose on the 5th of March and, looking around wildlv, exclaimed in a distraueht manner, "Where am I?" The day was extremely wet under foot, and the bottom just seimed to fall out of the sky. General Greely has hurt himself more bv this, I think, than by any other act since lie took the isothermal lines in his hands. Everything was done to make people en joy themselves, and I think that the fact was pretty well established that neither of the two ereat parties has a mortgage on temperance. Temperance meets with a more cordial reception on a Presidental platform, I think, than anywhere else. I have never seen so much drunkenness in my life, though years ago I had a full entree to some of our leading alcoholic circles, as Doc Hayes would say. ElfJOYENG HIMSELF. A gentleman from a distance, who said he was the first to think of General Harrison as a candidate for President, and meant to have told his wife about it at the time, but forgot about it, had the largest compilation of drunk that I ever saw. He was not only drunk, but he was surprised and gratified to know that such was the case. He bought a seat containing a quart of plain, new laid rain, and a teacupful of umbrella juice. Seating himself Calmly in this, he tied a stone to his last remaining sorrow, and drowned it in a broad-shouldered phial which he carried in his overcoat pocket. The procession, however, behaved itself, and the orgies seemed to be largely in the hands of unidentified people, who carefully scrutinize the papers every day in search of excuses for getting drunk and so remaining until there is another demonstration. They belong to the country. They owe allegiance to no clique. They go to Washington or anywhere else totally unpledged. They drank yesterday because they did not feel well; they drink to-day because they fear they are not going to feel well, and .drink to-morrow because they felt so much better the day beiore. While waiting for the procession to pass A'd At the Inauguration. by the other day I wrote out a new set of rules to be used in hotels. When I go "to a hotel I register, get a room, if lean, go to it, or repair to it, rather, and if there are no rules I go to another hotel. Hotel rules have been a great boon to me. When not reading the "Stranger's Guide to the City," or the hours for meals, or the bell-boy code, I love to read the rules. These- are to be added, of course, to those now in use. What the country really needs is more rules and less food. Give me rules enough and you may take the fodder. SXE'S HOTEL BULE3. Hotel joint resolutions for use of hotel joint: Joint , resolution No. 1. Called up for a first reading and referred. Washing done in hotel room will be charged for at regular laundry prices. This is not done so much for the purpose of en couraging the infant industry ol washing in rooms, as it is to foster and encourage the laundry at the hotel. No. 2. People in reduced circumstances are requested not to die in the house. No. 3. People who unavoidably die in the house are requested not to do so as the result of a contagious disease. No. -4. Guests who carry away key of room, on going to Siberia or elsewhere, will be chareed with rent of room until they re turn. No. 5. Guests are requested to leave the towels on going away, as wc can use them later on. Economy is Wealth. No. 6. Guests are requested to unlock the door before committing suicide. Vn. 7. We will not be responsible for in jury to baggage which may lall from back window oi guest s room uunug mo uiguu No. 8. Guests contemplating suicide wlU please leave Gabriel call at office. No. 9. Guests who do laundry work in their rooms are requested not to take in washing from other guests, as U paralyzes our own laundry. No. 10. Young husbands who contemplate shooting their wives at this house .will do well to inflict a fatal wound in themselves first No. 11. Horses and carriages provided at office for use of guests, but not allowed in room. AS TO VALUABLES. No. 12. Guests will find a safe at office, provided expressly for their use, for the safe-keeping of valuables. They are cor dially invited to come and store them there, and the valuables will be returned if not available to us. No. 13. Dogs will be charged table board and the owners will be required to pay dou ble fare besides. Dogs will notbc allowed in rooms, under beds, or under any circum stances whatever. No. 14. Guests are requested not to allow the bath tubs'to overflow just to see how tiie rugs will look floating about the room. No. 15. Children are provided with a separate dining-room, where they may fill their ears full of jam and put maronaise dressing in their hair if they are "in the habit oi doing so at home. No. 16, Persons who fall down the ele vator shaft are requested to avoid pulling off the plastering with their front teeth. No. 17. The fire escapes of this hotel are intended for the use of guests only. Other outside people, in case of fire, seeking to use these fire escapes, will be pushed back into the building again till they are done. No. 18. Guests from Arizona are re quested to file'down their spurs before retiring-at night. E. Fitzwtlliaji Nye. N. B. This house has been newly fitted up and furnished throughout aad hat been thoroughly-fireproof so Jar. y B AGNOSTIC' HERO. - Gail Hamilton Dissects the "Charac ter of Kohert Ellsmere. A MCE I0VEE BUT A WEAK MAN Who Went at His New Belig-lonWiUi Hysteric Tiolence. A LONG TIME LEARNING AN OLD TEUTH rmmra fob the dispatch. HE quarrel is not so much between Mrs. Humphrey Ward and orthodoxy as it is between ag nosticism aud Mrs. Ward, is quarrel also, let it be tri umphantly remarked, is of the head and not of the heart; is of the matter and not of the manner. Both Mrs. Ward and the author of "John Ward, Preacher" honorable women have set an admirable example, especially to theological and scientific dis putants. They have avoided disgusting their opponents by vulgarity of treatment They have attributed to their .antagonists the same refinement and elevation of char acter that they have bestowed upon the rep resentatives of their own views. Mrs. Ward has even gone further than this, with perhaps unconscious generosity a generosity not less magnanimous because instinctive she has pictured the orthodox as far superior to the agnostic Agnosti cism has far more reason to complain than orthodoxy. Indeed, her statement cannot be accepted as a presentation of agnosticism in its present stage unless we qualify it by remembering always that what it presents is the present popular stage; the conclusions and condition of the intelligent receptive, agnostic lay mind, not of the original ag nostic student, scholar, thinker. A MAN OP STEA-W. Mrs. Ward loves her agnostic hero just as many a woman loves her husband for what she thinks he is, not for what he is. She fancies him a man of thought and he is bnt a man of straw. He has as little apprecia tion of the vital point of agnosticism as he has of orthodoxy. In fact, he has far less. His orthodox wife, in the silent nobleness of her chara'cter, in the force and fact of her love, self-sustaining but never self-asserting, grandly docile, renewedly battling and repeatedly overcoming the narrowness of her inherited and taught belief, represents practical if old-fashioned Calvanism far bet ter than her "liberal" husband, groaning, dependent, timorous, accepting without dis crimination and bowled over without re sistance, represents the glory and the joy of agnosticism. He thinks that he is ham pered bv his wife's "intellectual limita tions;" but he himself has no intellect Prom beginning to end, so far as theology is con cerned, there is not one single convolution under his skulk He is a fineJad; he makes love charming ly; he falls into the wiles of the adventuress as a high-minded male idiot may; hebreaks away from her with simple and direct hor ror as the high-minded man, though an id iot, must But w hen it comes to theology he has not a word io say for himself. He is pushed into agnosticism by one man, he is pushed into his witc's confidence by anoth er;he is pushed into his city work by a third; he'ls-puretthd'sweet and unselfish, but as an advocate and recommender of agnosti cism he is incarnated weakness. Nor can one too emphatically repel and resent the inference nay, even practically, the assertion of Mrs. Ward that the way of truth is dismal, desperate, destructive of happiness. Her reverend investigator revels in misery. The reading of his first book of critical exegesis he ever afterward remembered with such a tightening of the heart, associated with such a night of misery, that we almost forget to -ask bow it happens that an Oxford student should have taken holy orders, and be in active and regular service in the Established Church without having read a single book of critical exe gesis! It would seem as if the church in stalled over her flocks not strong-limbed shepherds, but bleating and defenceless lambs. GEOAKS TOO MUCH. So it is perhaps less to be wondered that with the first breath of critical exegesis there swept over the soul of this little lamb a dry destroying whirlwind of thought. Elements, gathered Irom all sources, entered his soul, and as it passed seemed to scorch his heart He groaned indefatigably, sometimes with only a half-groan, occasionally with almost a groan, but everywhere was the element of groan. He claimed to be an object of pity till his will refused, as it were, to carry on the struggle any longer at such a life-destroying pitch of intensity. The intellec tual oppression of itself brought about wild reaction and recoil till some chord even of physicial endurance gave way and some thing seemed to snap within him. This is not thought, it is hysteria. It came, not because the young man was a conscientious high thinker, but because he had never re ceived a proper theological training, and had not sufficient intellectual impulse to train himself. It reminds one of nothing so much as ot the emotion and the commo tion which pervade the household of the Be v. Horace Crewler, when Tommy Traddles annonnoed his engagement to Sophy, where upon says simple Tommy in awe-stricken tones to gaping David Copperfield: Mrs. Crewler gave a scream and became insensible. Sarah clinched both her hands, shut her eyes, turned lead color and became perfectly stiff) with various effects upon the other eight of a most pathetic nature as it was broken to them, while the marriage mounted from her legs into her chest and then to her head, and then pervaded the whole system in a most alarming mannerl It is not simply that Mrs. Ward's hero suffered all this, but that she thinks it ought to be suffered. She thinks it is the normal way of thought She fancies that it is moral and intellectual superiority instead of pure intellectual inferiority or lack of in tellectual training. She asserts that his re ligious dread aud shame and terror are such as every good man feels in a like strait; but it is only the good weakling who feels it; the good athlete, feels nothing of the sort. The Oxford tutor was struck with the simplicity and fullness of his former pupil's avowal, and reflected that a lesser man would hard ly have made it in the same way. It would have been more to the purpose to reflect that a great man would not have made it at all. There would haveTieen no avowal to make. A TISIID SATTJBE. There is a suggestion somewhat timid, indeed that the young man belongs to the minority of natures that are at the merer of thought, at the mercy of truth the minority from whom, in fact, all human advance conies; but all that is sensible in the sug gestion is its timidity. Gripped, rigid, re sisting, anguished, bound to the chariot wheels of truth, perhaps he des .rightly represent the manner in which the great mass of humanity advances; but he in no way1 represents the leader and charioteer of thought, panoplied and upright, guiding his course with keen eye and strong hand, rejoicing la the contest aud sure of victory. He has little perception of the nature of truth who does not. know that the world offers no greater joy than its discovery whether that unfolding come slowly like the rapturous -dawn, or suddenly dazzling forth from clouds and thick darkness. To him who had once Been a Ohristian of. the old sort, says the great Oxford tutor, PETTSBTJBG, SUNDAY, comforting his pupil in epileptic agonies, face "deadly pale, quivering painfully, the "parting with the Christian mythology is the rending asunder of bones and mar row." Never. There is no marrow in such bones. A Christian of the old sort, who has not simply felt its spirit in his life, but has given direct and candid thought to its doc trines, feels, in parting with its myth, that he has come to the fulness of time when the clumsy centuries-gathered conglomeration is to clear away and the simple direct re ligion of Christ is to shine forth in Its pristine purity. It is the sublime and crowning moment of his life, the revelation .of.God and from God in his own -rapt and worshiping soul. That a man should need to be dragged to it by cart ropes , as Mrs. Ward's young rector was dragged through five definite months of anguish and pallor and convulsion, is not because he is a great man, but because he is a weak man. HTSTEEIO TIOLENCE. He displayed his weakness in many ways He went at his new religion and his loving wife with the same hysteric violence which is as far removed from strength as spasm is from health. He grappled for the first time with his, borrowed book of exegesis after he had'eome home late from his nightschool, with no one up in the house; and he had not even the sense to sit dawn. He read stand ing! Outside, the tossing, moaning Decem ber night; inside, the faintly crackling fire, the standing figure. Naturally he was in a state of nervous excitement. Anv person up alone in a house at midnight is liable to feel a "cruel, torturing band laid upon his inmost being." If, when Ihe rector came home late and tired, he had arranged him self for the night, with nothing to do when he should have ceased reading hut to blow out his lamp and sink to sleep, the "deso late, intolerable moment" would have been changed into a buoyant, budding promise 'and prophecy under whose benign overpow ering spell the only self-repressibn needed would have been not to waken his wife out of her beauty sleep to talk it over. Instead of which the result of his childish vigils was to frizhten her out of all happiness and light-heartedness by stalking around like a maniac concealing or meditating a murder, and then because she cannot bow down and worship his maniawe are to lay it to her intellectual limitations." And what did it all amount to? What truth did this advanced thinker strike out with his wrestlings and struggles and anguish and quiverings and sharpeststing and desperate catechisms the delirium tremens of a "constantly increasing sense of oppression, of closing avenues and narrow ing alternatives which for weeks together seemed to hold the mind in a grip whence there was no escape;" five months of "living intellectually at a speed no 'man maiatains' with impunity;" walking through the woods with hands locked and face like the face of a blind man, getting paler and paler, his eyes growing duller, mere instinct with a slowly dawning despair? A VITAL TROTH. Simplv this: In the shelter of the wooded lane with the birds in the branches and the gusts of air rustling through thegorse, wait ing, conscious that it was the crisis of his history, there rose in him, as though articu lated one by one-by an audible voice, words of irrevocable meaning: "Every human soul iu which the voice of God makes itself felt, enjoys, equally with Jesus of Nazareth, the, divine souship, and 'miracles do not happen.' " It was done. But it was better done 1800 years ago, when Jesus Christ himself declared the same truth, of human and divine kinship; came on earth expresslj to declare it; when he stretched forth his band toward his dis ciples and said: "Behold my mother and my brethren ! For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is iu heaven the same is my brother, and sister, and mother. As Thou, Father, art in me, and I in Thee, that they also maybe one in us." better said" by Paul: "The Spirit itself beareth Witness with- our spirit that we are the children of God, end if children then heirs; heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ" Infinitely better said when Paul not only asserted our sonship, but cried out, "Because ye are sons, God hath sent forth the Spirit of his Son into your hearts, crying Abba Father." Better said by the beloved and loving dis ciple, "Beloved now are we the sons of God and it doth not yet appear what we shall be." Old orthodoxy has befogged many truths, but it has kept itself alive because it has kept alive in its rugged bosom the vital truth that we are the children of God. It is a great truth, but it was not left for a nine teenth century agnostic to discover, and there was no more intellectual advance in his lying awake nights over it than there was in the sailor's rushing out of church and knocking down the first Jew in the streets for crucifying our Lord on the plea that, though it was done 1,800 years ago, he had just heard of it Gail Hamilton. MEN BEAT HOTELS. A Nnmerons Tribe of Folks Who Want Something for Nothing-. Hotel News Agent in Globe-Democrat, 1 From my position behind the news stand here I see every day and night many strange characters in the dead-beat line. There are 20 men at least who drop in each evening for a supply of toothpicks and matches. A loose sheet of paper or an envelope left in the writing room disappears within a few minutes. Some years ago there was an old man who went from hotel to hotel and rifled the racks of railroad folders, which he sold for old paper, but he was finally arrested. Paper snatchers are another set A guest reads his paper through and1 laving no further use for it lays it upon the chair. No one would have the least objection in the world to' anyone picking it up, but the hotel lounger, aware of his own meanness, goes to work to secure it in the stealth iest manner. He will first sit down on the paper, and then slowly and gradually he will pull it out and stow it in his pocket Another class, and they are regulars, the boys all know them, are the "snipe hunters." A snipe hunter is a person who is in search of cigar stumps thrown on the floor. There Is one old man reputed to be worth 8100,000 who is chronic. X have often watched him maneuver to secure a "grass-hopper." He will pass the half burnt roll of tobacco several times, and then stop nearitin a meditative mood.He will then pull out a grimy handkerchief and abstract edly mop his face, and then let the rag fall to the floor in a careless, mass, but with such precision that it covers the "snipe," and both are picked up together. "The boys at the bar have loaded several of the stumps, and I saw the old man I spoke of somewhat startled by a sudden explosion one night, as he lit his latest find at tne cigar counter; but it did not keep him away. Another man, a well-dressed young fellow, I often see picking ud hall-consumed cigarettes. He must be a cigarette "fiend" sure enough. At the Old Bed Schoolbonsc. Teacher sharply'Who's" tk toasting apples?" Judge, MAEOH IT, 1889. THE PABgOffS PERIL. - A Yonng Clergyman's Barrow Escape From Arrest on a Charge of MAKING COUNTERFEIT MONET. Tales Told by Idle Tongues Cause a Most Unusual Commotion IN A QUIET C0UNTBY TILLAGE WniTlXN 70S THE XIPATCff. Of pervaded the hearts of the gossips of Melnocket For once in their lives they had something to talk about beside the shortcomings of one another and the second-hand scan dals that were al ways current con cerning certain per sons living at Eaw son's Ferry, a rival village two miles below on the Arragumpus creek. Mel nocket now had two sensations all to itself. First, Beulah Church, to which nearly all the religions people of the town and the neighborhood belonged, had a new pastor, for the first time in. 30 years. Second, it had been declared by no less an authority than a United States detective that Melnocket was the headquarters and abiding-place of the largest and shrewdest band of counterfeit ers in the entire State. Now either of these events, coming singly, would have been sufficient to tet all the tongues in the vil lage wagging most industriously, but com ing simultaneously, as they did, the an nouncements caused such a flutter of excite ment that all the traditional "nine days' wonders" of the place were as nothing in comparison. Melnocket was a sleepy old village, yet it was easily aroused, and the extraordinary occurrences just mentioned had stirred it from center to circumference. The new pastor, Bev. Milton Morgan, a wide-awake, business-like young theologian, had scarcely had time to get settled and be gin his labors in Melnocket as the successor of Elder Joseph Maxwell, now a dyspeptic, decrepit and leeble old man, when the news of the counterfeiters having been traced thither came like a thunder-clap to the ears ot the villagers. It was not strange that such a secret as the Government detective was in possession of should lck out, before he had time to make arrests, in a place like MelnockeC If anv person ever succeeded in keeping a secret there it must have been long ago, and the art of refraining Stota gossip doubtless died with him. In this instance the officer, on whom much pressure was brought to bear to disclose the nature of his business, indiscreetly confided his suspicions to 'Squire Henderson, and the 'Squire, in .his usual cairulous way, told the whole town whaf he'had heard. "Bill Bennett, you are a fool!" "Mebbel am, mebbe I am, 'Square," re plied Bill, addressing the first speaker. .4-A(if The JParson't invention Exhibited. "Your say-so doan't make it so by a long shot, though. 'Twouldn't be so terrible strange, even if I was a leetle weak in the upper story, seein as I'm own cousin to yeou." "Haw, haw!" chuckled. Dave Williams, Constable of Melnocket and Deputy Sheriff of Arragumpus county. "Bill hez ye there, 'Square. Ye cahn't deny yer relations, an' ef it comes to twittin' on facts I'll resk Bill agin any man in the caountry. His tongue is a match for your'n, 'Square, even ef yeou hev studied law." "Shut up, Sheriff," said the 'Squire stern ly. "Wo are here to talk business instead of nonsense. Now, Bill, will you state the grounds for the preposterous statement you have just made? "I jest said I believed the new parson was one o' them counterfeiters. My sus picion is that he's the head man o' the gang. Mebbe I can prove it, an' mebbe I cahn't, but a man hez a right to his opinion. Ef yeou 'n' the Sheriff had "a seen what I hev p'raps yer wouldn't be quite so forrard about cailin' me a fool fer speaking my mind." "What have you seen?" demanded the 'Squire and Dave together. "Wall, yer know the minister moved into the old Dr. Frost hause, when he came here, sayin' he preferred to pay rent fer the prop erty rather than take the parsonage an' drive old Elder Maxwell from the only home he ever bad, or is likely to have in this world. That sounded very nice of the parson, an' mebbe it was nice I ain't a sayin. We understand the reason the new preacher give3 for livm' half a mile out o' the village an' no neighbors near him. We know why he occupies the old house, but I'm puzzled ter know why he needs ter use the doctor's old 'potecary shop too, ef makin' sermons is the only trade he toilers." The shop to which Bill alluded was a small building, situated several rods from the honse now tenanted by the Bev. Mr. Morgan and his family. It had been erected by the former owner of the place as an office and a storeroom for the medicines he found it necessary to keep on hand. Dr. Frost like most country physicians, had kept his own stock of drugs, there being no apothecary in the village, and filled his own prescriptions. "If that is the basis of your mysterious allegations," said the Squire, assuming an air of importance and adopting his court room manners and style of speech, "the matter is easily explained. The pastor told me he had converted the office info a study. The house is small, yon know, and he has several young children who make a deal of nbise." "Well,'. continued Bill, "it may be the parson makes his sermons with a hammer and anvil, at midnight, with the door of his study looked. Ef he does, he's got a differ ent way df doing things from what Elder Maxwell had, that's all!" "Bill, what are yon talking about?" thundered the 'Sauire. L "1 know, ef yeou doan't. T'other night I was comin idown tne road past the parsons between 11 Bud 12 o'clock " "Ho! hoi Up courtin' tha widder till pooty late.i wa'n't ye, Bill?" exclaimed Dave Williams, chuckling 'loudly once S)ore. I "I der'uoez its anybody's business what Vwl j&C sXlJ c I'd been doin', 'n"ef yeou want my story yeou'd better keep yer head shet As I passed the doctor s old shop Isee a light in the winder, but the curtain was daown 'n I couldn't see inside. But I listened. Even? now an' then I could hear a steady clink, clink, clink that sounded like a blacksmith hammering somethin' kind o gently on en anvil. I was a leetle mystified, but I walked right up an' tried the door. It was locked! 'Jerusalem,' sez I, 'here's queer doings on the parson's premises. An' I jest made up my mind ter find but what was up. So I went across the road an' hid in a clump o' trees an' waited an' waited. Byrne by; much as an haour afterward, somebddy unlocked the shop door an' come lout 'Iwas the parson himself 1 He locked the shop an' went inter the hause, an I got noma on got to bed at a qnahter to 1 o'clock." "Bather mysterious," murmured the 'Squire. As for Dave Williams, he was too much surprised to offer a word or even to chuckle. After a long pause the 'Squire asked Bill ii that was all he knew about the matter. "Not quite. My brother Sam, who keeps the store, says the parson tried to pass a bogus half dollar on him only yesterday, an' got as red as a lobster when Sam told him the money was no good." "Nothing surprising in that. There is so much of the counterfeit coin in circula tion it wouldn't be at all strange if some of it got into the contribution box, and thence into the minister's bands." "Wall, by gosh, this thing has got to be investigated," said the Deputy Sheriff. "There's a reward of $5,000 offered for the arrest of that gang o' counterfeiters, an' I aiu't the man to let any part of the money slip through my fingers ef r can get. hold of a man that makes them pewter pieces, whether he's a parson, or not." The result of the conference was the de cision on the port of the trio to surprise the clergyman at his mysterious work on that very night. It he was making counterfeit coin Deputy Sheriff Williams would arrest him, taking him in the act, and he and Bill Bennett would share the reward between them. Williams was as confident as Bill that the Bev. Milton Morgan was an im postor, doomed to speedy disgrace. 'Squire Henderson expressed no opinion, but his curiosity was sufficient to take him with the others on their midnight expedition. There was a light in Mr. Morgan's study, and the clergyman was busy in the rear room of the little building, when there came a loud knock at the front door. "Who is there?" "No matter who it is," said the Deputy Sheriff, acting as spokesman forthe party. "We have business of importance with you." "Oh! in that ca,se you can come in," re plied a cheery voice. "But it strikes me this is a most unusual hour for the tran saction of business. Wait an instant I'll open the door," said Mr. Morgan, as the impatient Williams began knocking again. "Well, neighbors, this is indeed a sur prise," exclaimed Mr. Morgan as the party entered. "Glad to see you, though. Take seats and make yourselt comfortable," said he, noting the fact that his visitors were glancing uneasily and sheepishly artund, appirently at a loss what to do or say. "Working on your sermon at this honr?" asked the 'Squire. "Well, hardly. I don't work all the time on sermons. But there is a- bit of work, rather out of the line of clerical duty, that I am anxious to finish, and that is why you find me up so late. What can I do for yon, gentlemen?" "What have you got in the back room?" demanded the Deputy Sheriff, bluntly. ''Oh, ho I So my little secret is not quite a secret I've got something there, Mr. Williams, that no one save myself and my wife has ever seen. I hardly ieel like ex hibiting it just yet." "Nothing you're ashamed of, is it, par son?" ventured Bill. "Ashamed of? Well, I Bbonld say not I'm prouder of it than anything I ever ac complished before. You shall see it I know of no good reasons for trving to con ceal it, though I had thought I would say nothing about it But you have surprised me at my work, so I might as well tell you all. Step into the back room," said the clergyman, leading the way. "There, what do you think of that?" he asked, pointing to an objectin the corner. , "As ponty a piece of machinery as I ever see, by gosh!" exclaimed the Deputy Sheriff. "What's it fur?" "It's an invention of my own, designed for use in a portion of a cotton mill. I have a brother interested in the manufacture of cloth, and I've been in his factory a good deal. This is only a model, but it works perfectly. I made it ail myself it's nearly complete, and after I've made a few unim portant changesI shall get the invention patented. I believe it will make my own and my brother's fortune," said Mr. Morgan, eying his work with honest pride. -"You perhaps wonder how I learned to use tools. My father was a machinist, and I served a regular apprenticeship at the trade. He wanted me to be a minister, and I am one, but my fondness, for mechanical work is as strong as ever. I've fitted this room up as a shop, as you see, and I think I have every thing quite complete. Oh! you needn't thine a minister can't invent anything but sermons," he exclaimed, laughingly. "See here!" and throwing off the dressing gown which he had donned to receive his visitors he fastened a leather apron around his waist and stood up, looking more like a healthy young blacksmith than a clergy man. He knelt by his machine, pointed out the different parts and explained their uses, but it is doubtful if his visitors heard a word he was saying. A more humbled and shame faced group than the trio beforehim it would be hard to picturer Mumbling some unin telligible apolocies for having disturbed him, the magistrate, the deputy and. Bill Bennett-departed with as much haste as they could and made their way back to Mel nocket t If the Bev, Milton Morgan ever knew how near he tame to being arrested as a counter feiter he wisely kept that knowledge to-hira self. Eliakim Eastman. DM Ho Love Her Enough for Thntf NewlorKSnn.i She I like you George, but He But whaUove? She Why, all the girls know I 'never had a beau beiore. and'thev would tease me to .death if I accepted my first offer. TuoFarsnit of Perfection. New lor It San.: Sckuylkill We ore becoming quite prominent in literary matters. Don't you think so. Miss Waldd There :wos a time when a .Philadelphia magaztneLwasu'tworth read ing; now it is no( fit to read. The Conference at the 'Squires'. TffiLILYTOOCHON A Legend of WRITOCE3T I'OJR -BT- BiA.roEiicrEi Synapsis of Preceding: Chapters. The story opens early to the pres ent century, on a bright morning' in Marcnr Wendell Orton, artist and dreamer, is landed from a little schooner in the Bay St Louis, by the Creole owner ot the vessel, Victor, who is to return for him April 10. Orton's host is Edouard Garcrn, whose family consists of himself, wife and pretty daughter, Lalie. A mystery surrounds a lovely villa in the neighborhood, whose owner is Mo'sieu Bochon.and who has a lovely danzhter known as tho "Lily ot Kochon," of whom Wendell Orton dreams daring his first night at the Utile inn. Orton overhears a conversation which leads him to believe that his host is engaged m un lawful pursuits. He meets the LUy of Bochon, and is struck with admiration of he! beauty. Gaspard Bochon prepares to attack Goran and his free boaters, and Orton volunteers in his host's defense, CHAPTEK V. OETOK- MEE1S BOCHOIT IS COJUTLICT. The firing down the bayou was drawing nearer and nearer. The enemy was ap proaching iu rowboats, as could be told by the splash of oars and the rattle of thole pins, while a small party of picked, men from Garcin's party was harrassing them from the tall grass of the bordering marsh. It was evident that Bochon meant to force a landing at some point nearby and take Garcin's place by storm. Orton walked swiftly over the ground to be defended by his little party and found that in the midst of the slough there was a deep ditch-like" creek, or miniature bayou, up which row boats could easily come. Near the point in the large bayou where this small one entered, a little sloop lay ready manned for action and pretty soon she opened fire with a swivel or a small carronade by the blaze 6f which Orton saw plainly the fleet of advancing rowboats behind which and towed by them came a small schooner. "The shot from the sloop was answered by a booming discharge fired from a pieceat the bow of thelarger vessel and the shot went singing overhead, striking far A PEISOJTEB back in the still, dusky woods with a heavy crunching sound. After this was a short lull and then the musketrv becran to rattle in a lively, sputtering way on both sides of the bayou, as Garcin s advanced pickets fell back under cover of the sloop and were supported by a body of twenty resolute fellows behind a low fence of heavy oak posU driven close together in the sand. Bochon's flotilla came right on, firing furiously, the rowboats, after giving the schooner sufficient momentum to bear her forward to a favorable positidn, parting and dropping back a little to be out of the way of her shivels which were now belching a level shower of missiles that raked the Garcin house and garden and tore through the light defenses at the water's edge. The sloop answered sturdily, but she was too small and pretty soon Orton saw her men jumpingoverher sides and swimming ashore, while the bayou's water was beaten into foam by the balls and bullets striking around th'em. Suddenly, as if at a signal, a group of the enemy's boats swung out toward the shore and Orton saw five of the number en ter the little bayou that he and his men were guarding. Each boat carried seven men. "Lie down, quickly!" ordered Orton, in a low voice, and as his. men obeyed, he stooped to get a better view of the advancing flotilla. Then, for the first time, he was aware of sf line of men just beyond the slough, and at the same moment came a heavy volley crashing lrom that quarter. Orton and his men returned the fire with promptness and effect, but this exposed them to the boats that at once began to en- .filade them with murderous precision. There was nothing to do but to fall back in the direction of the garden and permit the boats to land. The schooner was doing deadly work now, as she slowly drifted toward Garcin's little dock, firing her swivels rapidly and pouring from her deck a succession of musketry broadsides. A voice, like the trumpeting 'of a mad bull, roared orders from the little vessel's bows; each word could be heard distinctly above all the other noises of the conflict xt was old Bochon, who, with a cutlass in one hand and a heavy pistol in the other, stood impatiently waitiag lor his vessel to touch the dock so that he might leap ashore and bear down upon his victims ii person. Orton and the survivors of his party, availing themselves of every cover that of fered, slowly retreated toward the garden, firing rapidly as they went Meantime Garcin .had been driven from the fence be low the dock and had kept his men together ouly by the most desperate efforts and the uost reckless personal courage. The struggle lasted much longer than might have been expected reasonably, but it coutohave no end save in the" utter defeat of Garcin's baud and the destruction, of the Garcin place. No sooner had old Bochon reached the dock than her sprang ashore, followed by a score or more of his most ef ficient men, and rushed upon the house with yells that lairly shook the forests around. The building was in flames very soon and Garcin and his men, routed and badly cut up, fled in every direction, pursued by their enraged and bloodthirsty enemies. When Orton saw Bochon's men landing and making ready to assault the house, be suddenly bethought him of his pictures and sketches Without further reflection be ran in; aad, snatching them up, fled with, them by way of the garden. He had nearly escaped in the woods beyond when the party coming up irom tne bayou raet-aiHi, "& "' Bay St. Louis. TJU-hi DISPATCH TJHoairsorf. f and to avoid them he bad to tarn bacC. During this'short time the building bad been fired, and the flames were glaring thrpugh the windows and doors. The musketry had nearly eeased, but mad shouts were ringing away in the direction of the flying and the pursuers, Orton hurried through a side gate of the garden and was making his way toward an opposite angle of the fence, knowing that a small wicket was there, when old Bochon, uttering lion-like roar, rushed upon him with brandished cutlass. There was no time for hesitation. The young man. let fall hisr bundle of sketches and drew the heavy rapier that hung at his side. When a man is in sudden and imminent peril his thoughts are quicker than IigUV ning and oftentimes flash over the whole of his past life, setting his personal nistory be fore him like a drawing in bird's-eye? perspective. As for Orton, however, is this instance, the apparition of old Bochoa (tearing down upon him with murder in his face and swordflashing sharply in the light of the burning house) made him think of hut one slight incident of all his past ex perience, and this now leaped clear cut and vivid into the very foreground of his mem ory. It .was the meeting of Mile. Felieie Bochon in the moss-veiled woodpaththa other day. Strange what two or three terri ble moments could do in the way of laying bare to him his own heart? Like a sweet, swift light Hashed into him the conscious ness of a consuming love for that tall, lovely girL Bomantic and improbable enough all this may seem to the casual reader; but to him who has met danger in every form and escaped death through every narrow crevice of chance it will be but a glimpse of real life under the pressure of most terrible exigency. As concentrated weather sometimes develops a plant in a single day so all toe power of a lifetime compressed into a moment may perfect in stantaneously an inspiration, a hate or a love. When Orton's sword crossed with that of Bochon and the fire leaped from the clang ing steel, the young man was thinking of the girl to w.hom Victor had given the the name of the Lily ot Bochon, and Victor's idle stories about how many men had fallen ,in love with her all in vain, were running AT EOCHOIT. through his mind. He recalled every time be had see her, remembered just how she wasdressed, just how she looked and every motion niade by her. Butthi3 cerebral re troversion had no effect whatever upon the strength and supple adroitness with which he met the furious fencing of Bochon. The old man was still extremely active and his Jionderons frame had muscles and sinews ike steeL Possibly Be was a trifle blown with having raged so much, but he handled his cutlass with both steady power and' skill. It was well for Orton that the rapier given him by Garcin proved to be of exquisite temper and strength; for Bochon's blows would have broken a less faithful blade. From the start Orton felt that he faadno light struggle before him, for although in the beginnine Bochon sought to bear him down by sheer weight and fury, there was that in the old man's wrist movements which told of a swordsman perfect in his art The cutlass was shorter than the rapier, but its supe rior weight, when wielded by such muscles as Bochon's, gave it a dangerous advantage. Cut, thrust, feint, parry, clash, clink, round and round they fought in the fast increas ing clare of the conflagration, their eyes fixed in that .steady, vigilant stare, one waver from which meant death, and that intense, burning concentration of look which means absolute purpose to slar even in death's last trrip. Thev heard each other's breathingkeenand (Juice above the roar of the fire and the still noisy, though scattered spray, of the running skirmishers. The moon was just beginning to gleam above the woods to the eastward through a light log blown in from the Gulf. Overhead a flock of bewildered water flowls were wheeling about the sky and' clamoring in their far-reaching metallic voices.. A man hard-pressed and panting heavily broke through the frail paling ot thev gar den, and snatching up a short hoe brained Rhis pursuer, who was coming through after yiim. vjnon, oy an indirect sense oi vision. was aware that the man who had thus saved himself was Garcin, but he really did not see him. On went the poor, worried fel low, passing out at the rear gate and at last gainlug the woods. Kochon quickly discovered that for once in his life he had his match. The young rnau gave not an inch to him, but after a few moments began to press the fighting with rapidl v accelerated energy . and bold ness. Twice the doughty old man felt a mere touch of the keen rapier pointy each, time right over his heart, but this did not daunt him-, it but made bim the more com bative, courageous and dangerous. With the quickness of a swordsman whose prac tice had been lifelong he noted Orton's fav orite, guard and foresaw the purpose of his play. "He thinks that I am old," ho said to himself, "aud that I shall be blown pretty soon. He'll seel" And new Bocnon'a sword began to leap about in a way that would have bewildered a less ready fencer than Orton, who instantly took the de'ensive, parrying the rapid cuts and thrusts and warilv watchintr for an unguarded point He leaped about trying to lorce- tne oia man into as violent action as possible, hopp ing thus to ontwind him. But who could outwind that grizzled, iron-framed giant? The longer they fought the- iresncr ana tne snnnler ha anneared. The names were breaking through the roof of the burning; bouse and streaming in lianng not tongues out over tho water. They soon would en danger Bochon's flotilla if his men did not . return from their wild chase and more the schooner and boats. Bochon thought oi this, and suddenly, without iff the least' clieeklntr his onslaurfit, thundered forth sa orderthat went bounding and booming off tZ through; tne nignt use tucvoiee or an oi,5 auigator ouu. "Man the boats t Man the bcaU I aad. -