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ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, iiia
Vol. 43, No. 331. Entered at Pittsburg I'ost-
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PITTSBURG, WEDNESDAY. JAN. 23. 18S9.
SUCCESS P0B THE EXPOSITION.
The $37,000 of subscriptions secured at
the Exposition meeting last night, made
the gathering itself a gratifying success,
and put the Exposition project fair on the
road to an equally signal and manifold
more gratifying triumph over its difficulties.
One of the promising features of the meet
ing was the disposition shown by all classes
from the largest business men to the smaller
merchants to join in the support of the
Drojeet The subscriptions of fire thousand,
one thousand, five hundred, and one hun
dred dollars, were all indicative of the
readiness of the wealthiest as well as the
email business men to furnish whatever
funds are necessary.
There is still much work to be done in
raising all the funds required; but with the
start secured by the last two meetings every
one will be inspired with faith in its com
WHAT WILL THE HOUSE D01
The tariff bill was passed by the Senate
yesterday by a strict party vote. The bur
den now rests with the House of saying
whether the tariff dispute shall be settled
this session, and the surplus, of which we
heard so much about a year ago, reduced
'without waiting another year. Of course,
as the Senate bill in most respects represents
a. wide variation in policy from the House
bill, the lower branch cannot be expected to
accept it entire; but it still has the responsi
bility of deciding whether it will kill tariff
legislation by various pretexts of delay for
the six weeks that are left, or push it to a
compromise in conference committee. While
both measures are open to criticism, the ma
jority of the people who can view the sub
ject free from partisanship will think it bet
ter for the country to have the matter ended,
if it is possible to reach a fair compromise,
than to have the uncertainties prolonged for
Itecent numerous transfers oflarge blocks
of Pittsburg real estate in the business part
of the city show the faith of capitalists in
the growth of this place. The immense
buildings put up in the past few vears are
to be followed by others on a still larger
scale, particularly on Fifth and Penn ave
nues and Wood and Smithfield streets.
Thus events are shaping themselves in the
direction foreseen and predicted fully by
The Dispatch at various times in com
paring the future of Pittsburg with that of
other cities which until lately were making
more pretentious declarations of their
"booms." Here there has been no extrava
gant bulling of property. Hardly a house
has changed hands on mere speculation.
What has been bought and what has been
built has been in almost every instance
to supply an actual and pressing need
of business already existing. In place
of the erection of immense structures to ac
xaodate and invite business not vet in be
ing, Pittsburg has simply moved under the
pressure of business already here. The
large investments now under way on every
Bide are the outcome of no mere visionary
expectation of "booms." They are under
taken in nearly every instance with refer
ence to wants already felt Thus they are
the most convincing evidence at once of the
present prosperity and of experienced judg
ment as to future prospects.
The extension of the Vanderbilt interests
and the promised early completion of the
South Penn road are also straws in the same
direction. Prom all present signs it is safe
to regard 1889 as opening with brightest out
loot for this district oi any year in our local
THE HONONGAHEXA CASE.
The argument on the condemnation of
Lock No. 7 of the Jlonocgahela Navigation
Company's works, in the United States Cir
cuit Court yesterday, opened up some very
important issues, not only in connection
with this immediate case, but with regard
to the appropriation of any corporate prop
erty by the Government The most promi
nent of these in the arguments was whether
in the condemnation ot corporate property,
the payment must include, in addition to
tbe value of the works, the value of the
franchise, or in other words, for the earning
power which the corporation has obtained
by the public grants. The other one. which
is less prominent at present, but which is
likely to arise if it is held that the franchise
must be paid lor, is how the damage to it
is to be estimated, when it is left undis
turbed on six other locks and dams,
through-which all the traffic from the prop
erly condemned must go and pay tolls'
These are puzzling questions, and the pr
lie will await the final decision on ' 1 A
with great interest even if the w a;tjn(r
covers the term of years necessary to ., f!
ruling on them from the United States Su
A EESULT OF THE AGSESjgJSSj;
Tbe lauure 01 tbe stock marr
et to respond
to the assurances of the P
ment by wh!ch dividend are t0 be . -ccted
into an immense amnnt of watered stock,
is generally to indicate the Jack
?.y e Part of the public iD the
pledges of t magnates. That may have
somethir . JV. ... . . ... ,
.g 10 uo niiu 11, uui. iuc ueveiup
which are gradually being made con-
.!... .1... A i.tilr.. .(..I .nnn.ef anntltn..
-nfluenee which throws a good deal of light
on tbe railway-policy.
It must be remembered that concurrently
with the publication ot the agreement, there
was a unanimous announcement that rail
way stocks were to become very profitable
jiroperty. All the railway authorities and
the entire press agreed to that, with a lew
chronically independent exceptions. But
sothwithstanding the combined boosting,
stocks failed to go up, and the Atchison,
Topeka and Santa Fe stocks developed
alter a few days a decided disposition to go
down. The explanation of this is furnished
by the fact leaking out, that in pursuit of its
policy of pushing its lines ahead of develop
ment on the financial qualities of wind, that
company has swollen its debt to $70,000,000,
and, in addition to the recent suspension of
unearned dividends, now contemplates a
deficit of some 57,000,000.
This certainly is enough to account for the
decline in values; but it does not make the
connection with the great railway agree
ment quite clear, until weobserve the reviews
of the stock transactions, which point out
that as soon alter the agreement as the ap
pearance of a bull movement conld be
worked up, some one commenced unloading
that stock on the market. In a single hour
of Tuesday of last "week 92,000 shares were
sold. There is no question but that the
agreement was useful to the Atchison in
siders in enabling them to dump-some 510,
000,000 or $15,000,000 of the stock they had
made worthless on the market.
It is intimated that the agreement was
not strong enough to enable all the stock to
be unloaded, that the people wished to get
rid of; but enough of it was done to make
it a pertinent question whether the railway
policy requires the Presidents to get up
agreements in order to let wreckers unload
worthless stocks on the confiding public?
A SUFFICIENT EXPLANATION.
The intimations that the Farmers and
Mechanics' Bank of the Southside had been
victimized by its former officers were given
a substintial basis yesterday by the news
that a 540,000 check was discovered, drawn
to the order of a Chicago grain broker, but
not entered on the books of the bank. This
is accompanied by declarations on the part
of some oi tbe Southside people, that the
former cashier and his brother had been
speculating in grain.
These statements, if accurate, furnish a
full explanation of the failure of the bank.
There has not been a bank failure for the
past five years that was not caused by specu
lation, and the number of institutions that
should be fiduciary, but have been be
trayed by the speculators, is legion. It is
thought strange that men holding such
positions should violate the trust that is
placed in them for the hope of making
money by speculation. But when we
reflect that the hope of speculation is
to get the money of other people without
giving a fair return for it, what wonder is it
that men who are tempted by the glittering
but deceptive prizes of that dishonesty
should be led into borrowing the money
placed in their charge and which they al
ways intend to return?
The wonder should rather be the other
way. It will be strange, When the tempta
tions to speculation are present on every
side, and the great fortunes won bj thimble
rigging the markets are dangled before all
eyes, if the ruin and loss to financial insti
tutions and honest depositors is not multi
plied ten, twenty or even a hundredfold.
OF TIMELY INTEHEST.
That the quality of Mercer justice in deal
ing with the liquor question is stern enough
to satisfy the most exacting may be inferred
from the sentence of three months impris
onment and $500 fine yesterdav imposed on
a well-known Pittsburg druggist, Mr.FIem
ing, who was held guilty of breaking the
law by sending liquor to that prohibited dis
trict C. O D. Had the custodier paid for
the goods in Pittsburg when ordering them,
Mr.Fleming presumably would not be held,
the sale then taking place here. The case
presents an awful warning to druggists and
wholesale liquor dealers to be careful to see
that cash accompanies orders-in transactions
with local option counties: but that the ter
rors of such legal proceedings will be power
fully operative in the interests of temper
ance is to be doubted. The buyer and seller
will simply evade the legal penalties by
having their agreement made and the money
pass outside of the prohibited district
It the exhilarating fluids which STr.
Fleming supplied to Mercer county were
intended for re-sale there in violation of the
law, or for general distribution in any
form, there might be good reason for the
Bench exercising great severity. But if the
party ordering them wanted them solely for
private consumption, and not pro bono pub
lico, as it were, the sentence must be re
garded as quite salty.
The Supreme Court, it is announced, is to
have a say on the legal bearings of the fatal
C. O. D. arrangement. Meanwhile ti e
further development of the case in that hv rh
and mighty tribunal of last resort will, be
watched with keen, almost painful, interest
by the people of the whole State, who, should
the Constitutional amendment patf, next
June, will want to know under w'hat safe
restrictions and commercial usages they
are thereafter to get their "wet goods" from
THE COMING QUESTTOX
The vote on the joint resol'jtion submit
ting the prohibition amendment to the vote
of the people, in the House, yesterday, was
as The Dispatch had predicted, a very
strong one. It may be taken as a foregone
conclusion that t'je vote in the Senp.te will
also be decisive. While the question is not
a party one, as "nas been said of Ip.te with re
gard to the a doption of the araendment by
the people, tnat with regard to its submis
sion has been made so muUa party one,
that the Senate will not tr ke the responsi
bility of reversing the ac tion taken by the
This leaves the que' tions with regard to
the future of the amendment, (1) what will
be the result of the pr ,pular election; and (2)
what will be the cor .rse of legislation it" the
amendment is ra titled. The activity of
some of the leaders in introducing amend
ment s to the li cense law shows that there
aTrs many arr.ong those voting for the
amendment -who do not believe that it
will be ratified. If they thought
prohibition would be the law of this State
after next J one it is certain that they would
not now be introducing license bills to be
come a dead letter before they were in full
operation. Their judgment may. however,
be no better than that of anyone else; and
the readers of The Dispatch will have an
opportunity of judging for themselves from
our special correspondence on the subject
before the vote is taken.
Should the amendment be adopted, it
is tolerably clear that it cannot receive im
mediate enforcement without a session of
the Legislature. But it may occur, in this
connection, that the governing powers of
Pennsylvania have displayed considerable
skill at times, both in failing to pass legis
lation to enforce Constitutional provisions
and in omitting to call extra sessions to
supply needed legislation. There are a
good many possibilities intervening between
yteterday's vote and the entire extinction of
the liquor traffic
THEY SHOULD TAKE TIME.
An interview with Representative Laf
ferty, who introduced the bill containing
that remarkable provision excluding all
new street car lines from Pittsburg, except
by consent of the existing lines, gives the
following statement as coming from him.
"The bill was handed to me just a lew mo
ments before I presented it, I bad no time
to read it and consequently knew nothing of
We have no doubt that Mr. Laflerty's
statement is correct, and we have little
doubt, also, from other indications, that the
practice is becoming somewhat common for
members to introduce bills which are handed
to them by someone else, with a very slight
knowledge of the provisions actually con
tained. This makes it pertinent to urge
upon our lawmakers, not only the good
policy, but the urgent duty of delaying the
introduction of their bills until they know
what is in them.
Xcgislators are responsible to the whole
State for the measures that they introduce.
It would seem from the remarks of some of
them that they regard themselves simply as
messengers, not to say puppets, of some
other persons, and that when they receive
bills all tbey need to ao is to perform the
errand without troubling themselves to in
quire into the character of the measure or
to consider whether it is such as they ap
prove or disapprove. Responsibility can
not be escaped in that way. If a member
proposes a measure which will confiscate
the property of all the private citizens in
the State it is no excuse that the bill "was
handed" to him and he "had not time to
Members' who understand the duties of
legislation will take time to read their bills,
and further than that, will introduce no
bills that they do not approve. The prac
tice of proposing legislation on important
matters just because some outside party
tells you to, is quite susceptible of abuse.
Me. Blaine voting the proxies of
Barnum and Bayard at the meeting of the
West Virginia Central Railro.sd, affords an
evidence that in the corporate affiliations of
statesmen party lines are not drawn.
The report of a Pig Iron Trust need
neither worry nor rejoice anyone. With a
capacity of furnaces out of blast and ready
to go in at any advance of prices, sufficient
to increase the production fifty per cent.,
acombination of that sort would be likely to
break its own back at starting. When the
Steel Beam Trust is going to pieces, the pig
iron industry is not likely to attempt the
The African Arabs have long been noted
as a trading people; and they are true to
their character now in offering to trade
prisoners whom they have captured for po
sitions which they wish to hold.
Colonel Elliott F. Shepabd, ex
plaining how he publishes a horse racing
column daily in his paper, in order to
spread the evangelical work among the
sporting men, is a sight calculated to pro
voke the laughter of gods and men.
The report that are being published
from the Pittsburg railroads show a good
business from this locality, however the
other lines may have suffered from throat
And now we hear 0 f charges of bribery in
connection with that Minnesota Senatorial
election. Is it possible that a Washburn
had to demonstrate I lis qualifications for
Congressional honors by coming down with
the boodle? ,
Now- that the Standard Oil Company lias
got the whole Lima oil field safely in its
grasp, we may hear another tale about the
merchantable character of that odoriferous
The news that ojet Lafayette Hall is to
be replaced by a modern business block
foreshadows an improv ement of our archi
tecture, but with it ithe destruction of a
place replete with reminiscences to the older
OVEB all doubts and discouragements the
meaning of. last night's meeting shines out
to the eOect that the Exposition must and
shall be a big success.
Me s. Eawson, from t he testimony in the
last Vial to which she is a party, appears to
be t. very bad lot. Jud-nng from the ac
tio ns of the other peoplt in the case it may
a) so be suspected that the complaint is con-
The Spottsville, Kentuc ky, bridge disas
ter only affords another example of the
policy of settling business disputes by petty
When the Times' lawye rs attempt to im
plicate Archb'ishop Walsh in their work of
attacking Parneli, some discreet friend
should be at hand to warn them that they had
got hold of the business eml of a boomerang
PUBLIC PEOPLE PARAGRAPHED.
The wife and daughter1 of Mr. Halford,
General Harrison's private secretary, are spend
ing the winter in Florida- Hiss Halford is
noted as a singer.
Captain William S. ldams, of Kingston,
who died not lone ago, nas a good friend of
his calling, for heleft-11125,000 to the Boston
Marine Society and SbO.OC O to the Boston Pilot
Lady Salisbury and 1 "jady Uoseberry called
at the residence of Mr. Phelps, the United
States Minister, in Lowndes Square, London,
yesterday afternoon, and informally presented
Mrs. Phelps with a saperb bracelet
Two of the young Africa n natives whom Car
dinal Lavigerie sent to 1 Jlle, tbsre to study
medicine, have just obtan ted their degree of
M. 1., after passing their examination in a
brilliant manner. Their n mes are Frederick
Mahomed and Vital Harriet L
Here Euqen Richter calculates, from re
cent military statistics, tlia. t Germany now has
at her disposal a war am ly of 3,513,416 com
pletely drilled men, not coi inting those belong
ing to the reserves and the i2uandstraui, who are
not drilled in'time of peac e-
A millionaire, named Tagllable, who died
recently at Milan, bequeat hed the sum of 50,
000 francs to the street sn ecpers of that town,
on condition that they would all go to his
funeral in their working c Jotbes. In his youth
he had himself been a.knij rht of the broom and
The Czar of Russia is an enormous eater.
He considers three poun Is of meat and two
quarts of champagne a irery liqht luncheon.
His dinner would be snfna ient for three men of
ordinary digestive ability. His insomnia is due
to his gormandizing, but hie prefers sleepless
ness to dieting. He Emotes constantly, and
altogether lives an existen ice which would kill
any man devoid of an iron constitution.
THE Cotnte d'Oultrem ont, an ex-officer of
cavalry, and now one of t be members of tho
Chamber of Brussels, has prepared a carefully
elaborated bill for the establishment of uni
versal obligatory service, by which the effective
force of the Belgian army is to be carried in
time of war to from 250,00010 300,000 men (it is
now about 130,000 men), w ithont any Increase of
the military budget.
Count von Moltke is- particularly fond of
music, and spends many in evening in the com
pany of his aid-de-camp,. Captain von Moltke
and bis wife, who sing aud play a,;reeably. He
Is also an excellent player at wlust, He has
plenty of bonhomie when he is in the presence
of company, and is not at all the tveiturn per
son frequently represented. He is an inveter
ate smoker, and enjoys his glass of beer. His
handwriting is remarkably clear, c onsidering
his age, and by tbe few erasures mad e it is evi
dent be rives everything careful thought be
fore committing it to paper, and never writes a
word more than is necessary.
Tula Tear's Cotidn Crop.
Charleston, 8. C, January 22. The Newt
and Courief says the cotton crop of this year
will be the largest ever made, ana will approx
imate 7.500.000 bales.
THE TOPICAL TALKEB,
Woodpeckeri, Sleight, nnd n LUtlo Heap of
Very Conflicting; Subject Treated
One of the Superintendents of Corstruction
in the service of the Western Union Telegraph
Company showed me the other day a section of
a telegraph pole, which had been turned into
the semblance of a pigeon-hole rack by the bills
of thrifty woodpeckers on the line of the Cen
tral Pacific. I had seen similar curiosities be
fore, but my friend of the Western Union told
me something that was still more surprising.
'The woodpeckers," said he, "are just as
troublesome in the South. Tbey drill boles in
the telegraph poles and everywhere else they
can, fill up the cavities with acorns and then
calmly watt till the embryo oaks decay and
breed worms. The woodpeckers can see a long
way ahead when they're preparing a feast of
worms. This practice of the birds gives the
Western Union a good dealot trouble, and
there Is no way to abate the nuisance. Tho
woodpeckers would honeycomb the wooden
truss bridges so common on Southern railroads
were it not for the close watch kept over the
bridges by men armed with shotguns."
The aspect of Wood streot from Fifth ave
nue toward tbe Monongahela will be greatly
changed. The wind storm of January 9 and
what a jury has declared to be the negligence
of certain builders, contractors et al., has
wiped out a very sqa&t and unbecoming row of
houses. In their place big buildings worthier
of this city and day will go up. Lafayette
Hall, an ugly old barn in spite of Its hlBtorlc
appendages, is to be razed to the ground ana
its successor will be a far handsomer structure.
The rapidity with which Pittsburg is ex
changing the short coats and knee pants of
childhood for the costume of a matured city is
amazing. It isn't safe for a man to leave the
city for any length of time now, for In his ab
sence it may outgrow him and have no place
for him when he returns.
'What can I do for you to-day?" said the
liveryman with a wave of his right band toward
tho sleigh department and of his left toward
tbe rear of a highly decorated hearse.
"1 want a horse and sleigh," said the young
"AH the horses are out except Polly will she
Young man remembers that Polly killed her
man last week after a brief runaway, but with
a burst of bravery he says: "Hitch up Polly to
a sleigh and r;hcn another horse comes In
send the hearse along after usl"
A TOtJXQ sailor who sailed forHayti on the
United States man-of-war Atlanta a few days
ago, wrote to a relative In this city a very
touching letter on the eve of his departure,
that is to say tbe letter was meant to be touch
ing. After giving directions about the disposal of
his worldly effects, in tbe event of his death at
the hands of the Haytians or yellow jack, ha
wound up with tho following appeal: "Please
give my dog, Rope, to Ted Smith, and tell him
to take care of him for my sake. I will let you
know where you can send me that $50 as soou
as we reach Port-au-Prince."
"Got a frightful headache this morning, my
dear," remarked Mr. Peetsberg to his wife at
"Too much dinner at the clut last night"
sagacionsly responded bis better half.
"Too much dinner? Why, I only had a few
oysters, some roast turkey, an entree, et
"I guess it wasn't the et cajtcra so much as
the caitera you drank!" was the terrible
As Italian laborer, who was at work in the
coke region, disagreed with his wife a few
months ago and decided to leave her for a
while and try his luck in Pittsburg. One day
last week he received a letter from bis sister,
who lives with bis wife, telling him that he was
a father for the first time, and that his wife
earnestly desired a reconciliation. He made
up his mind to meet his wife's overtures for
peace In a proper spirit, and started for the
Union depot at once to take the train for his
home in the country.
After he had bought bis ticket it occurred to
him that it would be a good idea to send a tele
gram to hts wife announcing his advent He
tried to tend the telegram in Italian, but the
receiving clerk wouldn't take it, so he com
pnnnded the following message in til-spelled
English: "Coming home next train; much
obliged for the baby."
And this story is strictly and entirely true.
EXCLUDING THE AMERICAN FLAG.
A School Board Refuses to Accept Banners
From a Secret Society.
ITTSTOir, Pa., January 22. Washington
Camp, No. 257, Patriotic Order of tbe Sons of
America, on January 4 made a proposition to
the School Board of this place offering to de
fray the expenses of placing United States flags
in all the schools of the city. The purpose of
tbe offer was to inculcate patriotism In the
minds of the young scholars and cause them to
become familiar with the origin, history and
meaning of the symbols. When the matter
came to a vote the proposition was rejected
3 to 2.
The opposition is claimed to be due to disin
clination on the part of the board to be be
holden to a serret society. The action occa
sioned much adverse criticism, which cul
minated to-day in the starting of a petition
asking for a reconsideration of the Doard's
action. It is believed that this is the only in
stance on record of a school board refusing to
admit tbe American flag into the public
schools. Similar requests have been made in
ether cities and have always been granted
nhnnt hesitation. The school board is com
posed of three Irishmen, one Welshman and
IT LEADS IN ALL THINGS.
A Paper That Gives It Patrons Everything
NVw, Presented In nn Attractive Manner.
From the Unlontown Genlns of Liberty.!
The leading dally newspaper of Western
Pennsylvania is The Ptttsboro Dispatch.
It leads In news and all things which go to
make up a first-class daily and weekly, and, as
a result leads in circulation. Regardless of
cost H gives to its readers everything new
which is profitable,entertainingand Instructive.
It is complete in all its departments, and those
who peruse its pages will find everything of in
terest in the news world presented in a most
attractive way by the best trained journalists
of tbe country.
Scrnnton's Municipal Situation.
Special Telegram to the Dlapateh.
Scraxtox, January 22. Tne Democrats of
this city to-day nominated John Quinan for.
Mayor, John Gibbons for Treasurer, If. B."
Reynolds ror Controller, and Jacob Geiger for
Assessor. The nominations for Mayor and
Controller will hold only in tbe event of tbe
Supreme Court declaring tbe municipal act of
IKTi unconstitutional at the hearing on Febru
DEATHS OP A DAT. "
John C. Parker.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Mraoville, January a John C. Parker, one
of the best known eltirensof Weatern Crawford,
died to-day or paralysis the brain at his borne
at Atlanta. Mr. Parker Vas a native of Ireland,
and served in the English army during the Cri
mean War. He came to America about I860, and
enlisted In the One Hundred and Sixty-ninth
Pennsylvania Volunteers, serving nntU the war
ciosea. lie was ageu o jeara, ijir. i aner re
cently became the possessor of a large sum of
money bequeathed by his father, 'who died re
cently in Ireland.
Hon. Brasilia Ilnsaey,
U1TTLE Cmek, MICH., January 22. Hon.
Erastns Ilnasey died yesterday, aged 89 years.
He came to Michigan in 1X4 and lived In this city
over CO years. He became a leader of tbe Liberty
movement thronghont Michigan in 1847-9. sir.
Husscy iru a very strong Abolitionist, and had
charge or the underground railroad station here.
He sheltered and assisted to escape nearly 2,090
Mr. Beuben Cramer, an employe of the Mcin
tosh, Hemphill & Co.'s foundry, corner or Thir
teenth and Etna streets, dripped dead in the mill
vesterdav morning. He was In the 59thvearof
his age and re-lded atthe corner of Ttrenty-secona 1
eireei&Qu juujnerry siier. n9 icarei a wueanu
seven children. Heart disease Is supposed to have
been the cause ofhts death.
Mrs. James I. Bennett.
Anne E. Bennett, wife of James I. Bennett, the
forme r well-known Iron merchant of this city,
died early yesterday morring at the lamlly resi
dence. No. 11 North averfqe, Allegheny. The ro-nu-al
services will be held Friday morning at the
TEE EIFFEL TOWER.
Tear of Its Falling- Precautions Taken
Against Sncu a Disaster.
From the London Globe. 1
Confidence Is restored to Paris. It is not
considered pleasant in the neighborhood of tho
Champ ae Mars to spend 43 hours in doubt
whether one is to be buried under the debris of
a tower nearly 900 feet high. However, tho
Eiffel tower can say "I stood 5" and the experts
say, on tbe faith of their theodolites, that it is
going to stand, unless anything goes wrong
hereafter. But while congratulations must be
offered to the people who live about the Champ
deMars, sympathy must be extended to the
crowds who came together from less menaced
quarters some of them with plumb-lines, just
as tbey would have brought smoked glass to
observe an eclipse to see what tbe monster
was going to do. That the monster did nothing,
after all this anticipation, was unfair; and it is
probable that its further rise in height will be
accommnied bv some diminution of popular
ity. The Parisians forgot that special provi
dence watches over ugly and useless things;
and that this is better security even than tho
theodolites of science. Were it otherwise, we
doubt if the explanations of the constructor of
the abomination would carry much comfort to
those who have to think, not of their neigh
bors' peril, whlcn of course is nothing, but of
their t ery own.
We are told that when the Eiffel tower does
really show symptoms of emulating the tower
of Pisa, a hydraulic press of bOO tons power will
move complicated machinery concealed in the
brick work, which again will remove one or
more of the thin plates of steel between the
stories, thus throwing the mass back into its
perpendicular. Cordially will the neighbor
hood of tbe Champ de Mars pray tbat the
hydraulic press v ill be always ready, and that
tbe complicated machinery will never fall ont
of gear. If soaring ambition should overbuild
itself and fall on the other side, the question
will have to be faced as to whicb side tbat
other is to be; and then even trust in Provi
dence may prove as misleading as in the case
of people who live under avalanches and vol
canoes. JOAQUIN ML-LER'8 ROMANCE.
Which Will be Published In Tbe Dispatch,
Begtnnlna- "ondny, February 3.
From the Uook World.
Mr. Joaquin Miller, the famous poet of tho
Sierras, has turned novelist by writing a ro
mance entitled "The Burled River." It is a
bold venture beyond tbe improbable into tbe
impossible, for it deals to some extent with
that river which some Callfornians have con
ceived as flowing under ground below their
mines and bedded in solid gold that has in the
ages washed into its waters. In that respect it
suggests a Rider Haggard phantasy. But
Joaquin Miller is ever a poet, and he has
placed an absorbing romance of quite reason
able if unusual love into that environment of
strange adventure. It Is a work that intro
duces him powerfully and remarkably into
prose Action, according to a publisher who
has read the manuscript. "The Buried River"
is one of the series of novels which began with
Franklin File's "The Colonel's Cards" and is to
be continued with "Tho Lily of Rochon" by
Mr. Maurice Thompson and a story of St.
Clair's defeat In Ohio by the Rev. Dr. Edward
Everett Hale. The authors share equally the
cash Income of the joint enterprise, however
unequally they may happen to gain the rewards
of fame by their contributions. At all events,
Poet Miller has made a strong stroke for dis
tinction as a romancer.
THE POTTERS' ASSOCIATION.
Business Transuded nt the Annual Meeting
at tbe Capital City.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Washington, January 2. The Potters'
Association held a very short meeting to-day,
principally on account of the desire of most of
the members to attend tbe session of the Sen
ate and listen to the closing discussion on the
tariff and witness the taking of tbe vote. All
that was done was to hear the address of the
President, Mr. Thomas Maddock, of Trenton;
the report of the Secretary, Mr. Alfred Day, of
Steubenville, and to appoint committees to re
port upon matters of organization and interest
to the trade to-morrow. President Maddqck
in his address, dealt particularly on the feasi
bility and necessity of giving more attention to
the production of a finer grade of ceramics,
and thus cultivating a taste tor the industry as
an art, and educating the wealthier class of
people to the fact tbat art goods of this charac
ter can be produced in America as well as else
where. He also urged upon the convention the im
portance of a better display at the pottery ex
Eosition this year than there was last year,
ecretary Day spoke particularly of the condi
tion of the trade, which was stated to be very
fair. The importations, however, were reported
to be about $800,000 In excess of the importa
tions of last year. About 35 pottery firms of
the United States are represented in the con
vention. Election of officers, reports of impor
tant committees, etc., will come to-morrow,
and in tbe evening a banquet will be held at
Willard's Hotel, where mostof tbe members of
the convention are stopping.
C0XGER-N0T A CANDIDATE.
He Will Support Asa Bashnell for Governor
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Akron, January 22. Colonel A. L. Conger,
of this city, Ohio's Republican National Com
mitteeman, just back from calling on General
Harrison, says in an Interview here to-day that
be will not be a candidate for Governor of
Ohio before the next Republican Convention.
He says his large business interests require all
his time, and that business and politics do not
mix well. It Is understood tbat Colonel Con
ger will throw his influence in favor of General
Asa Bushnell, of Springneld,and that his with
drawal will make the race a close one between
Butterworth and Bushnell.
An Accident In Washington.
From the Chicago News.3
Pedestrian (to TVashlngton polioeman)
"What is tbe meaning of the great crowd in
the street, officer? Is anybody hurt?"
"No; there has been an accident and the
street is blockaded, but things will soon be in
"But tell me what has happened?"
"Why, you see. Vice President-elect Morton
has just met First Assistant Postmaster Gen
eral Stevenson, and their titles are too long to
pass each other on tbe same thoroughfare. We
are trying to indnc? tbe first assistant post
master general to resign for half an hour while
we get things into shape."
Progress of tbe Nlcarnaaa BUI.
Washington, January 22. The conferees
on the Nicaragua canal bill have agreed. The
following House amendments, it is believed,
have been dropped or modified: Requiring
that 10 per cent, of the capital stock be paid
np before any bonds be sold; providing for
printing across the face of the bonds of a no
tice tbat the United States is not responsible
for them, and allowing the United States to fix
rates of tolls on the canal.
They Will Have No nelp.
Little Rock, January 22. To-day the Sen
ate passed the concurrent resolution previously
adopted by tbe House, Instructing Senators
and requesting Representatives from Arkansas
in Congress to use their utmost efforts to defeat
the measure Known as tne liiair educational
bill. Tbe resolutions were adopted by a large
majority in both houses.
Mysterious Horse Mnlady.
West Chester. January 22. A number of
horses in this section are afflicted with a fatal
malady. Veterinary surgeons describe it as
being a species of spinal meningitis. The
throat and neck swell so tbat tbe animals can
not eat. In Westtown to wnship, Mr. Frederick
Brlnton has lost three fine horses, and another
is similarly affected.
Two Horseshoes at Niagara.
Lockport, January 22. Another large piece
of rock broke loose from the crest ot the
Horseshoe Falls last nlgbt. The contour of
the falls now presents a donble horseshoe. The
smaller one formed by tbe last displacement is
in advanoe of and to the right of the center of
the large horseshoe.
West Virginia's Go? Politics.
From the Washington Star.)
Political excitement in West Virginia is re
sponsible for many severe threats on both sides,
and if all that Is said comes true, General Goff
will take bis official cath sword in hand and de
liver his Inaugural address while standing knee
deep in gore.
Gen. Swalm Not Incnpncllated.
Washington, January22. Thereportof the
Army Retiring Board, appointed to examine
Judge Advocate General Swalm for retirement,
yias filed to-day, and has not found him Inca
pacitated for active service.
AT THE SOCIAL SHEIHB.
Bin. Park Painter's Brilliant Reception and
Several Oilier Nice .Events.
One of tbe most brilliant social events was
the reception given by Mrs. Park Painter, of
Ridge avenue, Allegheny, yesterday evening.
The carriages began to arrive about 8.30 and
kept coming until the number ot guests had
reached fully 200. They were received by their
host and hostess, whose assistants for tbe even
ing were present in the persons of Mr. and Mrs.
G. Edward Painter and Miss Darlington.
The floral decorations, furnished by J. R
Murdoch, were tasteful and varied, tropical
plants and ferns were mingled with domestic
carnations. Large balls of these latter were
suspended above the doorways, while tbe cur
tains were entirely covered by them and sur
mounted by festoons of smllax.
Six pieces of Uernert & Guenther's orchestra
made merry rhythm for tbe merrier leet, until
10.30, when supper was announced. It was
served in the billiard room, by Hagan. who did
full justice to the occasion, as did likewise the
Supper over, the guests dispersed through
the various parts of the house: the voanger ele
ment to again pay tribute to terpsicborean art;
others again to indulge in con ersation, while
again some of the gentlemen enjoyed a quiet
hour in the billiard room. Thus the morning
hours soon approached, on all too speedy wings.
The most prominent society people of both
cities were present.
THE LAWRENCE RECEPTION.
The Lnwrence Young Men's Democratic
Club Entertains Its Friends.
Tbe Lawrence Young Men's Democratic
Club held their first annual reception at Im
perial HalL corner New Grant and Seventh
avenue, last evening, with a large attendance,
the Royals and McMichaels furnishing the
A lunch was served in the hall by the club to
their friends and their welfare looked after by
the following aDle Committee of Arangements:
J. R. Deegan, Chairman; J. F. Schaffer. D. J.
DriscolL H. G. Pilgrim, G. A. Schott, J. Ber
ger, J. Leahy, M. W. Kane, O. Loudermilch
and Ed Cook.
A Quiet Home Wedding on Finnkstown
Avenue, East End, Last Nlgbt.
Miss Retta J. Henderson, daughter of Mr.
and Mrs. A. K. Henderson, of Frankstown
avenue. East End, and Mr. Charles A. Wright,
the Hiland avenue grocer, were married at tbe
home of the bride's parents last evening by
Rev. C. V. Wilson, of the Emory M. E. Church.
The wedding was a qniet one, with just tbe
iuimediate friends of the family present; after
which tbe bride and groom left on a late train
for a tour through the West, previous to
settling in their new home in the East End.
The First or a Series'.
Ths first of a series of entertainments to be
given by the Allegheny Cotillon Club material
ized yesterday evening at Cyclorama Hall,
Allegheny. The hours were from 8 until 2, and
about 75 couples were present. Supper was
served by Caterer Luther, and the music was
An Annual Dinner.
The annual dinner of the Pittsburg Plate
Glass Company was given at the works at
Crelghton, on the West Penn Railroad,
yesterday. About 50 invited guests were
present. Speeches were made by the most
prominent persons present.
A Juntn Gathering.
The Junta Club held a meeting at the resi
dence of Mr. Willis King, on Center avenue,
last evening. A lnncheon was served by
BAYARD'S SAMOAN YIEWS.
The Secretary of State Talks of the Recent
Washington, January 22. The dispatches
from London and Berlin in regard to Samoan
affalrs,pnbllshed in this morning's newspapers.
were shown to Secretary Bayard, at the State
Department, this afternoon, with a view of ob
taining some expression of opinion from him
on the subject. His attention was specially in
vited to the statements that "Germany has
come to a dafinite understanding with the
United States with regard to Samoa." and in
response he said:
"Of course I expect Germany to live up to
her honorable engagements with the United
States. I have no right to think otherwise.
But you must know that these are matters I do
not care to discuss in the newspapers."
When asked in regard to tbe policy of this
Government he referred the questioner to the
President's message to Congress of the 15th
inst., and quoted from his letter to the German
Minister, dated the 12th inst.. and which was
recently published, as expressing bis own views
on tbe subject The Secretary also alluded to
the agreement entered into between Great
Britain and Germany in April, 18S6, defining
the boundaries of English and German do
minions in the West Pacific ocean, in which it
is specifically declared that the Samoan islands
are neutral territory. The United States, he
explained, has no joint treaty with either En
gland or Germany in regard to tbe neutrality
of Samoa. Therefore, if Germany has inter
fered with tbe neutrality of that country, she
has not broken a treaty with tbe United States,
but has broken one with Great Britain.
0DR MINIATURE NAYT.
The Part It Is Playing In Protecting Amerl
Washington, January 22. The Ossipee has
been ordered to proceed without further delay
to Aspinwall for tbe protection for American
interests on the Isthmus. This vessel is now
at Kingston, Jamaica. She towed the steamer
Haytlen Republic from Port-au-Prince to that
port. Her departure for Aspinwall will leave
tbe United States unrepresented by a war ves
sel in Haytian waters until tbe arrival ot tbe
Atlanta, which sailed from New York Sunday.
From tbe Washington Star. ;
The latest census and year-book from Russia
reveals a remarkable fact in the official state
ment that out of a population of 108,000 000 but
721,878 Russians crossed the frontiers of the
country going or coming. The excluslveness
of China is proverbial, but considering tbe dif
ferences in civilization between the two coun
tries that of Russia is the most wonderful.
FOLLY AS IT FLIES
FEOM TUX FEN OF TUB BOSTON FOET PHILOSO
"Fortune knocks once at each man's door."
Tills we're Inclined to doubt;
Or If she ever knocked at ours
We certainly were ont.
How pleasant now to sit beside
The parlor stove
And press the maiden's Illy hand
And talk of love.
The hours swift winged unnoticed gilds,
And every care has fled.
Until her mother shoots downstairs,
You Jane come up to bed I
THE FLOOR WALTER.
From Arctic regions comes the blast;
The nights are bitter cold,
Unhappy la the man who has
A baby three months oldl
Oft when the nlgbt is 1U noon
And furious tempests roar.
To hush the baby's walling cry
He walks the bedroom floor.
A cloud of gloom la on Ills brow,
A sad, sad man Is he;
He knows that happy bachelors
Are snoring peacefully,
Strange things we observe
in this world without doubt
The man "taken in"
Is always "put out."
The sober of mind
Will sometimes get drunk,
And oft floating: debt
The merchant has sunk.
And not the least strange
Of things of this sort:
When tall men are short.
SnOtTLD IT BE ALLOWED?
Much swearing she causes,
Much comfort shemarst
The woman who carries
A dog In the cars.
II she Is pretty we must
Give our seat up to her.
And our envy's aroused
When she fondles the cur.
Each time she caresses
His rough, hairy face.
How we wish for the time
That we were In bis placet
All from tin Boston Courftr.
GREAT GOTHAM'S GOSSIP.
Caught In a Small Corner.
tNEW TOITE BCBEAtJ SFXCIAI.S.1
New York, January 22. Colonel Elliott F.
Shepard, editor and proprietor of the Alailand
Express, addressed 200 Methodist ministers an
the Sunday question yesterday afternoon. He
spoke for an hour and a quarter against Sun
day concerts, Sunday newspapers, Sunday
stages and Sunday exhibitions. He told how
hard he had worked all along to suppress Sun
day desecration in New York. At the con
clusion of Editor Shepard's remarks, -vthich
were enthusiastically applauded, the Rev.
George Lansing Taylor, D. D.,' D. C. It, poet
and divine, arose with much dignity and great
impresslveness. Ho said he was a subscriber
to the Mall and Express, and was accustomed
to read tie paper every evening with great
avidity and much interest
"But," said the Rev. Dr. Taylor, laying great
emphasis on the word. Every minister there
upon straightened himself up and craned his
neck to catch what was coming. "But," re
peated the reverend gentleman, there Is one
question that I want to ask Editor Shepard,
and that is why he devotes every evening a col
umn to horse racing in his paper?"
This was a stunner. The ministers applauded
most heartily, and shouts of "Good!" and
"Hearl" and similar expressions were heard in
every part of the room.
The confusion lasted several minutes. Col
onel Shepard was tbe picture of despair. After
a dead pause ot two minutes more Colonel
Shepard got up and replied that he published a
sporting column in the interest of Christianity.
By publishing sporting news he thought he
could induce sporting men to buy his paper
and read the sermons and moral editorials
whicb appeared in other columns.
Colonel Shepard did not make this explana
tion very glibly, and when he sat down no one
applauded. Colonel Shepard's address was
not in his great religious daily this afternoon,
although heretofore all his speeches have ap
peared in it verbatim.
Twas Not Mary's Own Article.
It is reported that Miss Mary Anderson did
not write the article over her name in tbe last
North American Review. She merely signed
it She is sorry because Mrs. Langtry and
Mrs. Potter have been offended by its severe
strictures upon society leaders who try to be
come actresses in a day. The story is that Miss
Anderson has explained to Mrs. Potter and
Mrs. Langtry, through a common friend, that
she did not write the article, but merely al
loived her name to be used. She signed the ar
ticle after only a hasty glance at the proofs.
The sentences that have caused so much
trouble Miss AndersorTunderstood to refer to
stag-struck young women of social rank. Miss
Anderson, if the story Is true, will probably
think twice before she again lends her name to
a professional writer.
A Bnbe Saves a Number of Lives.
Baby Williams, 6 months old, saved a whole
house full of persons from being roasted alive
this morning. A defective flue set fire to the
house of Williams' family, shortly after mid
night When the baby awoke the bedroom was
full of smoke. Her eyes smarted so tbat she
began to cry. The cries awoke the family, who
aroused 12 other tenants. All escaped in their
nightclothes. The bouse was burned down.
Importing n Pauper Reporter.
William O'Connor Laughlin, with his wife
and four children, was detained at Castle Gar
den to-day. Mr. Laughlin is a newspaper re
porter of Belfast, Ireland, and had only $5 in
his possession when he arrived In the Servia,
yesterday. Major J. B. Pond will endeavor to
have Mr. Laughlin released. Laughlin acted as
Pond's agent when Henry Ward Beecher was
Another Man Going After Stanley.
Victor Beaumont, better known a3 "Wild
Horse Charlie," is selling out his business in
Newburgh, preparatory to going to Africa in
search of Stanley. He expects to reach
Suakim on the British steamship Minora, to
proceed to Burba by rail, and then strike off
into tbe jungle with a tew followers. He
thinks he can find Stanley and get back to New
York within two years. He refuses to tell who
is sending him. "Wild Horse Charlie" has
seen active service in the British army, and
has held a commission in the navy. He was
with the British troops In Asbantee, when
young Prince Napoleon was killed. He is
about 40 years old and wears cowboy costume.
A Centenarian Lost In Harlem.
George Lynch, 102 years old, got lost In Har
lem yesterday. The police took bim to a sta
tion bouse and advertised him this morning.
At noon his son Patrick, 75 years old, called for
Ills Beard Cut Off by a Woman.
Israel Leitsky has had Mrs. Gougb arrested
for cutting off his beard. He tried to sell a pair
of suspenders in her saloon this morning. She
felt insulted. She caught him by the beard, and,
while her husband held bim, cut it off close to
tho chin. Leitsky charges her with robbery
and assault She will be tried to-morrow.
Through America to Jnpnn.
The wife and son of Lord Napier, British
Ambassador to Japan, arrived here on the
steamship Servia yesterday. After a few days
they will start for San Francisco, where they
will take a steamship for Yokohama on Febru
No Money Could Save His Life.
Max Shillak, 22 years old. ate nothing and
drank wine all yesterday. Last nlgbt, on a
wager, he drank two bottles of champazne In
quick succession. He then fell to the floor in
a stupor. The doctor who was called said he
would die soon of alcoholic poisoning. The
boy's father, a saloonkeeper, offered tbe doc
tor $2,000 to save his son's life. At 3 o'clock
this morning young Shillak died.
NEW NATURALIZATION LAW.
An Important Change Proposed to the
Washington, January 22. Mr. Oates sub
committee on Naturalization to-day reported
to the Judiciary Committee of the House tho
bill whicb it had prepared In lieu of all others
amenuatory or tne naturalization taws, rue
provisions of the bill, briefly stated, are a re
quirement that an alien must reside five years
in the United States before he can become a
citizen; that at the exniration of that time he
must appear in court and prove his residence,
good moral character and fitness for citizen
ship, and in the case of a United States court,
notice of bH Intention mnt be served npon
the representative of the United States, and
likewise in the case of a State court the repre
sentative of the State Government must be no
tified and attend tbe hearing.
The present requirement of a declaration of
intention to become a citizen Is dispensed with.
The bill was ordered to be printed, and will be
discussed at next Saturday's session. Tbe
views that were expressed this morninc an-
peared to Indicate favorable disposition of the
TJie Quick and the Dead.
From the Chicago News.
A Philadelphia grand jury has indicted a
dead man. It is sometimes hard to tell the dif
ference in Philadelphia.
THE WORKING W0KLD.
Trra city electric lighting plant of Topeka,
Kan., is burning petroleum for its steam fuel
instead of coal, as heretofore.
Manchester, Mo., is a booming manufact
uring center, and there is a demand for good
machinists there. It has a number of big in
dustrial concerns, and others are constantly
According to the Scientific American me
chanics can give steel tools a hardness like that
of the diamond by plunging them when white
hot into sealing wax. repeating tbe operation
nntil the steel Is too cold to enter the wax.
The tool should he then just touched with oil of
The leading labor organizations all over the
country are making unusual endeavors this
winter to seenre the passage of certain labor
measures by the various State Legislatures.
One of tbe things especially desired is the
passage of an emplo er's liability act modeled
upon tbe English law.
A Cautobnta machinist who has been ex
perimenting for years with a view to fin ling
some means of preserv ng exposed Iron work,
has discovered tbat wnen surf ices are coated
with finely ground lead, thinned with spirits of
turpentine no corrclve action or scaling takes
place, even when heavy coats of paint are af
terward put on the outside. His theory is tbat
tbe thin mixture of turpentine and white lead
closes the "very pores of tbe iron." Common
paint mixed with oil is too thick, as "the inter
stices, to so call them, are too minute to re
ceive the body whicb oil gives, but are closed
by a thinner compound."
Contraband liquor, valued at $42,500, Is
in the hands of the Sheriff at Burlington. laws.
A, white weasel was killed in the cellar
of the Hudson, N. Y., Opera House the other
At HawkinsVille, Ga., a spread has just
been finished in which 18,677 yards of thread
Owing to the failure of the rice crop in
Corea the Government has prohibited the ex
portation of other cereals.
A stone crab was exhibited at Charlotte
Jfafbr, Fla., this week, whose claw measured
clinches in circumference.
A block of fir wood was recently re
ceived at Portland, Ore., that was cnt from a
tree which was 150 feet high to the first limb.
The skeleton of a mastodon has been un
earthed In California. It is 30 feet lona and
has tusks between six and seven feet in length.
Persons who go throush the streets of
Alexandria, Va,. singing or whistling after 10
o'clock at night can be arrested for disorderly
The disastrous floods of the past two
years in Georgia are attributed to the wholesale
destruction of forests at tbe headwaters of the
T. J. Summers, of Americas, Ga., drew
something of t curiosity out of his well the
other day. Jt looked like an eel. except it had
four legs and web feet
A Lewiston man has invented a device
for stopping runaway horses. It blinds the ani
mal by clapping something over bis eyes. The
mechanism operates from the driver's seat
People do not appear to take as much
stock in lightning rods as they formerly did.
There are now only three lightning rod facto
ries in the country against 83 a few years ago.
The Texas Census Bureau has estimated
returns showing thepopulation of Texas In,
January, 1S87, to have been, in round numbers
2,025,000, an Increase of 26 per cent since 18S0.
In the corner-stone of the DeSoto
county, Florida, Court House, the arcadians
propose to store away, with ceremonies, the
names of the "chronic kickers" of the county.
C. R. Herr, of Stamford, N". Y., is said
to be the possessor of the gold watch which
Major Andre, of revolutionary fame, offered
as a ransom to his captors If they would lee
him go free.
A gentleman of Americus, Ga., took
possession of a piece of property tho other day
that has been in suit for about ten years. It
has gono through all of the courts, in all of
which be gained it
Imported tobacco now finds "a ready
sale In Japan and, according to native journals,
there has of lato been ome difficulty in meeting
the demand. In coneqnence in some localities
prices have advanced 10 per cent
Fewer passenger conductors Lava been
discharged from the Jlissonri Pacific road, It
is said, than from any other railroad in tne
West Many of the conductors in the road's
service have been with it from the start.
A Port Jervis, K. Y., man got clear of
a charge of robbing a clothes line at Middle
town, one day thi3 week, by saying he va3
pulling the clothes from the line with the in
tention of making himself a bed on tbeground.
The people of Portland, Ore.,are taking
steps to mduce the Legislature to establish a
vast park in the Cascade Mountains. It is de
signed to have the park include Mount Hood
and Crater Lake, which would make it a for
midable rival of Yellowstone Park.
A recent English investigation shows
that with men over 25 years of age the intemper
ate use of alcoholic beverages cuts off ten
years from life. Also that occasional indulg
ence, if carried to excess, doubles diseases of
the liver, quadruples diseases of the kidneys,
and greatly increases deaths from pneumonia,
pleurisy and epilepsy.
The remarkable result of a tidal wave in
the province of Bannam, Java, has been a
great Increase of tigers. The land laid waste
soon relapsed into a jungle affording welcome
cover to the tiger, which became so daring
and numerous that whole villages have hid to
be abandoned. Last year tigers killed no less
than 61 persons there. To remedy the evil tbe
Government of Java has raised the reward
for killing tigers from 100 to 200jruildersa head.
An original sign adorns a brick build
ing in Brunswick, Ga. The first floor of the
building is used for a negro restaurant the pro
prietor of which announced his Intention of
serving hot meals to hungry sons of Ham, by
painting on one side of the sign these words:
"Her Bovs is hot Meals," while on the other is:
"Cominandse fo yo self." It Is presumed tbat
he wanted it to read: "Here, boys, i3 hot meals;
come In and see for yourselves."
Eichard West, of Kingston, N. C, was
out the other day with his sweetheart horse
back riding, when her horse became frightened
and ran at great speed. The young man
spurred his horse and soon overtook her, and
calling out for her to loose her foot from the
stirrup, in an instant, while both horses wero
running at breakneck speed, he caught her
about the waist and snatched her from im
minent danger. When he had stopped his
horse the young lady was completely overcomo
A gentleman who lives near Albany,
Ga., had not received his paper regularly. The
gentleman WTote to the editor of the paper
complaining, and received in reply a letter say
ing that Uncle Sam had been enjoying Christ
mas, and probably that accounted for the Ir
regularity of the mail. The letter was read to
the postmaster at the place where the com-
glalnant lived, who, as It happened, was named
am, and as he was quite old was sometimes
called Uncle Sam. When the letter had hen
finished the postmaster, with tears springing
to his eyes, said: "Yes, I had been dnnkine:
the day that man was here, and he smelled it
on me; I know he did. and he's a preacher, too. .
I wouldn't have that happen for anything."
This was a clear case of mistaken identity.
A man in Ansonia, Ct, owns and lives
in a house that overlooks a large clock. Un
fortunately, however, the man thinks hn can
not see the clock from his chamber window, as
a brick chimney intervenes. To obviate this
and have the pleasure of looking to see tho
time of day or night while In bed (for the clock
has an Illuminated dial), he one day bored a
hole through tbe walls of his bedroom, close to
tbe bead of his bed, inserted a piece of two
inch gas pipe with a glass in the outer end, and
now all he has to do is to place his eye at tbe
inner opening and he has a foens upon the
clock without leaving his bed. His friends
asked him, when this was completed, why ha
did not have a clock in his room, instead of be
ing to so much trouble. And for the first tima
it dawned upon bim that it would have been as
FUNNY MEVS FANCIES.
ODEITT OP THE SEASON.
It must seem strange, whene'er it snows.
To the man who motion lacks;
It matters not how slow he goes,
He cannot help make tracks. Judgs.
The Still Sow Gets the Draff. Friend
Don't yonr boys worry yon with their noise?
Patient Mother A Utile, but then von know
when they aie making a noise they aren't in mis
chief. Uoston Courier.
Found Him Out Smith I've be"
studying Jones ror a long time, but I've found
bim oat at last.
Brown How did yon find him ont?
S. 1 went to his house to collect a bill he owes
me, and found him aax. Boston Courier.
True Enoph. Young Husband Flour,
I see, is arolng up again.
Young Wire Nevermind, George, we need not
buy It We can buy baker's bread, instead. Be
side, It saves the trouble of baking. Boston
A Question of Form. Yallerby Hnh (
I kaln't see, lloie Johnslng, why yo' wear a
striped shirt at dls time o' year. Taln't good
Johnson Good fawm! What ran a nlggah
know about good fawm who has to wear meal-bag
trousers 'cause he kaln't get bis feet through any
The Mother's Joke. Mother I would
not put too much faith In Miss l'ert, John.
Son Why not? She's all rlght.
SI.-Don't you think she's a little flighty, apt to
change, like a weathercock?
S. No. What makes you think she's Ilka a
It Because she's a little vain. Boston Courier.
LIKE AND UNLIKE SCOAE.
Two things that average sugar bas a heroine
Namely a sweet and melting way and also lots of
And, having these. 'Us safe to bet that, on the
On such a heroine there wUl be no flies, yon un
derstand. -Hit City Blizzard.
Rather Durable. Carpet-dealer Yes,
madame; that's a tine stair carpet, ana very dura
ble. Woman Will It last weU?
Carpet-dealer Madame. 14 years ago 1 sold that
carpet to a woman and she nsed It 10 years steady.
Woman Then did she throw it away?
Carpt-dealer No, Madam. I should lav not.
gorthe last four years her boy has worn It tit.
everyoay pants. juag .