- 'PTFT.r yl mmz? .VJ1 wvwwxmwvmmmmmwm THE PITTSBURG- DISPATCH, SUKDAT, JANUARY 13, 1889. 10, i I i then he realized that he was in a sense a wooer, because at the dinner of the previous evading, at the Dallas cottage she had nei ther allowed his claim of connubial rela tionship, nor vet utterly rejected him. She had successfully repulsed him, but without driving him far away. No earnest talk had occurred between them, and so Pootle, feel ing like a snitor, sought to avoid an exhibi tion of himself which, he was bound to real ize, would -not be romantically winsome. He felt, when safe in his compartment, that lie had discreetly escaped a disaster. The "Widow Gansett joined the two Dal lases, and at the same moment Winston Dallas sauntered up. "Winston was gay in a cap and sack of widely striped blue and white, and an embroidered shirt and white flannel trousers as other features of an ag gressively fashionable seaside toilet. Around his waist was wonnd a bright scarf, and he walked in low shoes and silken stockings. The Colonel eyed him with hardly concealed approbation. "Believe I'll have a go at the surf," said the dandy. The thoughtful father s gaze went out again to the stalwart figure of Victor Leroyd, who was swimming shoreward with May, nnd a quick calculation of the chances im plied him to say: "No, "Winnie better 'stay in your clothes as yon are. They're Terr cocky." Winston comprehended, and assented with, "All right, dad," as he casually ab stracted a cigar from that solicitous parent's inner pocket, lit it, and gave himself leisure ly over to an exposition of the latest graces in smoking. "You're impudent enough to prove a win ner." murmured the fond father. "You're saying it, Governor," was the re sponse. "I'll bet you a fall overcoat, old man, that before its time to wear one I'll take more money out of Leroyd than you get out of his uncle. Does it go?" "It goes." "They are bound for the races this after noon," interposed Sheeba, lor fear that the widow had" overheard their words, "and thev can't wait to get tbere before betting." The four talked to no consequence awhile, and then Mr. Pootle, who had hastily put on his ordinary attire, came among them. He was rather a jaunty human rotundity. in a suit of plaids, in which the crossbars of the iabric were huge, in deciding upon that costume he had counted the plaids across a coat worn by his nephew, and had then sought a pattern just sufficiently larger to make his own girth comprise exactly the same number of figures. That was his system for achieving symmetry by an ad justment of proportions, but he had at heart no confidence in it, and as he stood in the sand, about ankle deep by reason of his heavy weight, he keenly regretted the ap parent loss of height which could only make liim look the thicker. But Mr. 'Pootle wonld not have been depressed in spirits if his legs had sunk knee deep into the sand, leaving him somewhat in an attitude of kneeling to the widow, as they moved a little npart. Suddenly she quitted him and rejoined Sheeba, exclaiming: "No, no; no, sir no." "Sow, here, Mrs. Dallas," said Mr. Pootle, and he had a photograph in each hand; "look on this picture, and on this." "The counterfeit presentment of two siB ters," said the widow. ( Tm a-gettmg the critical judgment of this lady," and he faced one of the cards to Sheeba. "Who is that?" "My dear friend who stands there." "Arid who is this?" exhibiting the other picture. "That seems to beportraitofthesame lady when bonnets were fiat; and what is the controversy?" "Your unprejudiced identification ought to settle it, I should say. Hasn't she told tou? Well, this lady 'and I were married. 1 am seven j ears older now than then, but she isn't a day. We could'nt get along to gether. I was unreasonable, and she was romantic We parted. I have been passim: lor a widower, and she lor a widow. Now I have discovered her. She takes the picture that was the means of finding her, puts it alongside of an older one, and declares one to be my lost wife, but the other isn't the bame wi'fe found. Isn't it absurd?" "Why yes; I think so, said Sheeba, hesi tating tor the instant between frankness and duplicity; and then the Colonel interposed, politely and affably: "Ladies like to be coaxed. But tou shouldn't demand too much wooing, Mrs. Pootle, having once been won. Say you are jeconciled," and he joined their hands, "There. Bless you. It is settled." The group was sufficiently by itself to not be overheard by other people on the be3ch, and their actions looked like nothing more than common pleasantry. "What are you up to, Sam," whispered Sheeba to the Colonel. "Is it deviltry for deviltry's own sake?" "O, I'm doing your chum 3 good turn," lie replied. "What a racket it would be for xay darling Sheeba to wort," and he contem plated the pair. "My congratulations," Winston was say ing. Ihis quite rouses things, don t you fcnow puts a bit of life into the drowse." The flustered widow canght her breath hysterically, and showed symptoms of faintness. "Like a real bride," whispered the Colo nel to Sheeba. But the fun of that couple was instantly lost to Colonel Sam Dallas because another hand-in-hand pair, in whom his plot had a genuine interest, came into the party. These were Victor and May, dripping with the water in which they had been disporting, she enthusiastic over her first encounter with the sea, and he feeling a delight that he had never before derived from the exer cise of swimming. CHAPTER VL A MOTHER AND A DAUGHTER. A week later, of a morning, May Morris eat in the parlor of the Dallas honse. The room was moderately outfitted with chairs, settees and tables of willow; the floor was covered with Chinese matting; the walls had no pictures, but were decorated a little by means of grasses; and. to atonofor the lack of snmptnousness, the summer char acter of the apartment's contents made it look cooler than any truthful thermometer wonld have corroborated. The appearance of delightful temperature, no matter how xne mercury mignt nave remtea it, was heightened by the girl, whose hair was brushed loosely back from an unflnshed lace, and whose loose white robe gave no ex pression of warmth. Sunshine blazed hotly on the exterior of the building, but the light that tell upon her was not caloric The lower sash had been obscured temporar ily, in order to let the light fall illummgly, not on the artless figure, but on the bit of art at which she was working. It was not an employment that would bear close criticism. The employe onlv was perfectly admirable. Her lap was her easel, a toy box of water paints served for a palette as well, and other signs of makeshift showed that the undertaking was transitory. Sev eral sprays of fern were pinned to the back of a chair, and the painter was imitating them in colors on a cardboard. "Don't dare tell me it is bad work," she said to the Widow Gansett, who stood by. "I'm away from school and -can sauce my tutor. But do yon think Mrs. Dallas will like it?" "It doesn't need any judgment to answer that," was the reply. '"She likes everything you do." "I wonder why?" and the brush was stayed. "She puzzles me. Whenever she speaks to me, or so much as looks at me, she is gentle, amiable, loveable; and she leaves nothing undone to make my visit pleasant, althongh I was a total stranger before you brought me here. But there is at time a coarseness in her that shocks me. That is when she doesn't know, or has for an instant forgotten, that I am present. Her tender ness to me seems spontaneous, and yet it comes from a nature which, I tear, is hard and rough." The chin was lifted from the hand into which it had meditatively settled, as she raised an inquiring face to the widow before resuming with the brush. "She per plexes me." Ten minutes afterward, it was Sheeba Dallas who stood behind May unperceived, and gazed fondly upon her, belore disclos ing herself with a soft kiss on the brown hair of the girl, who started with a slight exclamation. "Did I frighten yon?" and there was a caress in the voice as well as in the hands that stroked the hair. "0, no; only I didn't know you withont seeing." in a gentle but careless tone. "Do you like this daub?" "It shall be a treasure to me." "It is a sad libel on the original here, but if you will accept it as a poor expression of my gratitude " "Only gratitude?" Sheeba thought as she sighed and withdrew her hands. "What have I said to hurt you?" "Nothing, my child. I am ridiculously nervous to-day. To tell the truth, Colonel asanas return nas orougm sometning 10 sadden me." "Can I sympathize with you?" and May stood up, with an honest look of her eyes into those tiiat were instinctively averted. Sheeba moved away, as though to save her daughter iroin contamination; out when the girl followed her across the room, took a seat by her, and comfortingly stroked her hands, she accepted the demonstration of re gard, slight and inconsiderate as it was, with manifest joy. "Talk to me about yourself," she said; "of your life at school." "There is hardly anything that I have not already told you," May quietly replied. "Then of what you recollect earlier." "That is little indeed. I was only 10 when my father died; and for as long as I can remember before that I had been in charge of a governess, seeing him occasion ally. The governess told me that he had brought me from England, and that she knew nothing of our history. Once I asked father it was his last visit before the news came that he was dead about my mother. He made a reply that I did not compre hend, further than that something paintul was associated with the subject." "Has a recollection of that suggested to Tou a possibility that your mother was not dead?" "O, how could that havebeen? If a mother were alive could anything keep her from her daughter?" "An estrangement between your parents might have separated her from you. Have you no memory of her at all?" "So; and yet in fancy I have created a mother who, in dreams and reveries, seems almost real." "What is this imaginary mother like?" "O, the gentlest, purest, loveliest of beings. This is an ideal mother, you know." If May had then looked up into the face that was bent over her she wonld have seen the agitation of the woman who drew her fondly into an embrace; but the voice was calm and steady. "Suppose imagine if you can that your real mother some day came alive to you, and, in all save her maternal love, proved as wicked as your ideal is good." "What makes you indulge in such a horrible freak of fancy?" And was it her shudderof abhorrence,or Sheeba's tremulous alarm, that shook them both, and made them release each other. "Iflknewmy mother was a wicked woman I should never be lieve that I myself could be good." "Could yqu not love her because she was your mother, and because she loved you?" "You are not right to suggest such a dreadful possibility." "Forgive me. It was a whim of my low spirits. The only mother for you is the good woman of your fancy the mother who died when you were a little child." Sheeba kissed May on the forehead, and it had the manner o'f a farewell, althongh the girl did not perceive it; and as May crossed the room to resume the painting, the mother's eyes were sadly wistful, as though watching the departure ot a daughter into a hopeless separation. CHAPTER VII. EUCHRE AND SOME ACCOMPANIMENTS. Colonel Dallas entered by one door, just as a servant girl came in by another, bring ing the cards of Victor Leroyd and Jonas Pootle. The Colonel took the bits of paste board, and held them, while reading the names, like the remnant of a hand of play ing cards. He told the maid to show tfie gentlemen in, and they were in the room the next minute, to be joined there almost instantly by Winston Dallas. The ex change of greetings had real and simulated cordiality. There was a jumble ot pur poses. Victor and May had during the week become good friends. They had done some horseback riding in company; they had gone together in a yachting party on the Shrewsbury; they had disported daily in the surf; and their acquaintance had pro gressed with summer rapidity into good fellowship. Mr. Pootle and the Widow Gansett had played at pursuit and elusion, for she seemed to im bibe from the Dallasses a spirit of fraud which incited her to let the old chap fool himself, and yet she was restrained by what the Colonel contemptuously regarded as very senseless honesty. The Colonel had not been deeply interested in the matter," nor engrossed in the merely casual winning ot small sums 01 money trom JUr. .Footle at cards, for that was in the nature of ordinary business. His mind was on the heiress, and he watched the doings of May, Victor and Winston as closely and impertnrbably as though dealing faro. In his frank com munings with himself, he had said that the cards seemed to be running his war, and that the last turn wonld leave the prize on his side of the layout; and in outspoken words of instruction, reproof aud encourage ment to Winston he had called him a stool pigeon for thegame;buttotheothers,includ ing Sheeba, he was seemingly unintentional. Never had he been more mannerly than to Victor, May and Pootle, and they accepted him as an uncommonly impressive gentle man. To Sheeba he was alarming, because for the first time he was notconfidentialwith her. Winston Dallas had been much with May, and even familiarly, as members of the'same household. He was a good ex ample of the trivial beau of a summer re sort, and therefore diverting, if not cap tivating, to a school girl unacquainted with such products of civilization. Colonel Dallas decided that the morning should be devoted to immediate results, however moderate, and he soon had Mr. Pootle and Victor placed with himself and Winston at a mild game of euchre on the shaded rear verandah, leaving the ladies in side the parlor, but within conversational distance through the widely opened doors. The stakes were only a dollar a corner, sed ulously concealed from the feminine eyes. The Colonel was no idler in his profession, and while engaged on masterpieces of nred- atory art he was willing to fill the odd times with potboilers. "Really, I am so bungling at cards," he lemarked, as he shuffled the pack and dealt clumsily, "that I almost envy the handi ness of a professional gambler." Then there was "Ioass" from Winston, "I'll assist" from Victor, "I'll play it alone" from his partner, the Colonel, and that left Victor out of the game longenongh to slip into the parlor where May was still painting. "That is as pretty a leaf as natnre ever made," Sheeba was saying in praise of May's work. "Your are an amiable critic," May re sponded. "The beauty of the plant is there, cer tainly," said Victor, with maladroit sin cerity, "althongh a botanist might regard the leaf as rather unique." ''You've made your four," was heard from Winston, at the game, and the then, too, joined the group inside. "You are less blind to my bad art," re marked May archly to Victor. "Who says it is bad?" Winston inter posed; "it 'is altogether and superlative ly good. See that bee. It is gone. But it was abont to alight on the painted leaf." "O, thank you." "Young gentlemen," the Colonel called, "come back to yourgame." "Obedience was yielded a little reluctant ly. Shortly afterward the voice of Mr. Pootle was raised. "Amelia," he said, in his boisterous tone of heartiness; "I bay, Amelia!" "Yes, Mr. Pootle," responded the Widow Gansett, with a nervous start, "if you mean me. But my name is Gertrude.'' "Amelia Gertrude you remember what a fine hand you used to play at whist?" "Ye ye yes." "Then yon have lost your skill," May re marked, "for I can beat you half trying." "And how I used to vow that the mole on your left wrist " Mr. Pootle shouted: "Why, I never observed it," commented May. , ' "Mr. Pootle you misremember," thewidow called back. "No mole on your left wrist? Well, if I'm mistaken about that little mole, I'll be bound that I'm right about a big one on your right shoulder." "Ye ye yes," and the widow wickedly wondered if she could paint a mole with her left hand. "Will anybody order me up ?" said Win ston, bringing the attention of the players back to the game. "I'll take your best, Mr. Leroyd," said the Colonel. "You are welcome to it," and Victor, dropping the rest of his cards, sauntered in to the ladies again. "There's my four points," said Winston, and he followed his rival. "That is better than the other, Miss Mor ris," was Victor's matter-of-fact remark upon May's latest fern. "Impossible impossible; the first was perfect," Winston vivaciously exclaimed. 0 -ti oia fnn inmcni'iminoto in vahi VS jsju. n iivv iuuiwiiuiiunvw vvi, praise," said May. "There is no such thing as a perfect counterfeit of anything." "Ah me!" sighed the widow to herself, "I fear there isn't;" and then her sense of rascality threatened to bring on hvsteria. ''Are you ill?" Sheeba asked; "Will you take a glass of port?" "Sherry, if you please," Pootle suggested. "She dislikes port." "0. I prefer port," said the widow, weakly. "Bless me, how our tastes change. Seven years ago port nauseated yon, and you were especially fond of sherry.' "So I was that is I forget." rising nervously; "I mean that I can't bear either." "There, there, Amelia you are nervous. Let us take a turn on the bluff." "Thank you," and she went with him across the lawn to the summer house over looking the beach. She made a vigorous attempt to smile. whereat the attentive Pootle exclaimed: "You've had it fixed." "Had what fixed?" "Why, the eye tooth that was gone out of your mouth. You've got a false one?" "Yes," in desperate resignation. "Very deceptive." "Yes, a wicked fraud." "Not in the least wicked." Would she have to lose a sound tooth to make her a counterfeit Amelia? The widow will never feel sure whether it was con science or the call for a dental sacrifice that caused a moral revolt "Now, Amelia," said Mr. Pootle, when they were comfortably seated, "shan't we we be reconciled. I've got to sail for Europe by the Saturday steamer, and to-dav's Thursday. Go with me, and we'll make a Eort of second honeymoon of it." "A honeymoon without a wedding?" with a sudden 'inspiration. "Now, don't you think it would be nicer for us to go to a minister and have a marriage ceremony per formed?" "Wouldn't that be bigamy getting mar ried twice?" "It wouldn't be twice only once," the widow broke forth; "I'm not Amelia I haven't a mole on my shoulder I haven't an eye-tooth out it was my twin sister you married. I've been half a swindler all the week, and I don't like it." Mr. Pootle was agitated. The mental disturbance put his fat face through grimaces of astonishment, perplexity, un certainty and finally resolution, after which his countenance settled into bland calm, and he said : "Will you marry me?" "Uive me a month to answer. "Just now you were in for a visit to a minister right off." "That was when I was tricky. I have re formed." "Say yes, and we're off across the Atlan tic A quiet call at a clergyman's house on the way through the city, and we'll buy a trousseau when we get to London. Stay we'll go to Paris for it." The widow said "Yes." CHAPTER VUL inE COLONEL DEALS TO "WIN. When Mr. Pootle's withdrawal broke up the game of euchre, the partnership of the Colonel and Victor had won a dozen dollars from the opposing firm of Pootle and Winston. "Shall you and I cut cards for the money, Mr. Leroyd?" the Colonel asked, indiffer ently. "As yon please," Victor assented. The Colonel never permitted himself to waste skill or take unnecessary risks. The play had been perfectly fair. Pootle and Winston might have" won if luck had favored them; but in that case Winston would have cut the pack at a jack, instead of the Colonel having to perform that small feat in sleight-of-hacd. He clinked the silver dollars, rolled them up in the paper uues, beeoieu ui&iiiciineu to iae me win nings, but overcame his scruples and pock eted the handful with a polite degree of dis dain. That trifle being disposed of, he de voted some attention to May Morris, the more important stake. Victor and Winston were by her side. It seemed worth while to send Victor away and leave Winston with her, and so he said: "Sheeba, oughtn't yon to look after Mrs. Gansett? She may be ill. Mr. Lerovd may like to go over to the bluff with you." That left no option, and Sheeba and Vic tor went to the summer house on the bluff, where they found Pootle and the widow, and were told at once of the betrothal. "And what will they say at the sem inary?" the widow objected, when the sud den marriage and departure forEuropewere mentioned. "It will look awfully like an elopement." "You won't have to return there to hear it," Pootle urged. "0, bnt there is May Morris. She was en trusted to my charge during vacation. Her chaperon can't leave her." "Not with Mrs. Dallas?" Sheeba conceived in a flash a project of sending her daughter away from all peril into safety. "No, no," she said; "don't leave May with me. That would be a desertion of your charge. But you can very properly take her along. She will be glad to go. and she will be safe with you but not with me not with me. And it is essential I can not tell you why that Colonel Dallas shall not know of her going. The reason is good it is for her happiness it is to save her from misery. Will you take my word for this?" "Of course we will," Pootle responded, and the widow echoed him. Pootle was in a state of flaming enthusi asm, the widow was marveling at the sud denness of her betrothal to riches, and neither was in a condition of mind to refuse anything to anybody. They were duly con- graimaieu Dy victor, who said to the widow: "My uncle is happy that is evident; and you will be, if being the wife of as good hearted a man as ever lived will make yon so." At which she responded half quizzically. "Thank you. Your aunty will strive to deserve him indeed she will." "I shall be something of an intruder upon your wedding journey for I am to go on the trip with Uncle Jonas unless under the circumstances I wonldn't be wanted," said Victor. , "O, your attention may be diverted from us if Miss Morris goes along." "May must go," Sheeba interposed, "be cause, although she is very dear to us here, Mrs. Gansett is responsible for her during her absence from school: and it is especially agreed that Colonel Dallas is not to " It was the Colonel himself who caused Sheeba . to stop short. He detected at a glance the deep interest of the group in whatever was under discussion. Victorwas was not less selfishly engrossed than the others, for he was impulsive beyond his habit with a sudden resolution. That was why he forgot Sheeba's injunction that the Colonel was not to know of the plan to let May go across the occanv with the bridal conple. "Miss Morris is without blood relations, I believe," he said. "But not without guardianship," the Colonel exclaimed, at a safe venture. "My wife and I feel as near to her as though she were our daughter do we not?" "Yes," Sheeba replied with difficult calm ness. " ' "Then I shall say to you what I would sav to her parents," the young man went on. "I have been in her society only a week. I have found her so captivating that my prophecy of the next two or three weeks may easily come true. I shall be with her across the ocean and back, unless she denies her society to me. She will escape all senti mental impression, very likely, but it will not be so with me. I asfc you, her guardian, as I would of her parents, it I may try to win her love." ' "Mr. Leroyd " Sheeba began, but her eyes were covertly on her husband, to watch the effect of the untimely revelation. His face was a mask of stolidity, and his tone was but mildly expressive of astonish ment and interrogation. "May is going to make a voyage with Mr. Pootle and his bride? A sudden nroiect." "You will let her go," Sheeba pleaded abjectly. "My dear," and his blandness was very genial, "had I not better explain exactly the relations we bear to onr darling May, so that Mr. Leroyd will understand our au thority over the girl our almost parental authority?" Sheeba made a crouching movet which would not have had more meaning to him if she had grovelled at his feet, although the others did not observe it. He went on as suavely as before, but with slow, deep emphasis, as he addressed Vic tor: "Then I will only say to you, sir, that you must do no wooing of May from the time she leaves us until she returns. You must refrain, positively, from the faintest npproach to her heart during this voyage. If you make this promise, on your honor, which, like my own, I believe to be unim peachable, she may go. Otherwise, she shall not." "Promise promise," Sheeba murmured. "It is only for a little while that the promise binds," the widow suggested. "And the young lady might stop you her self if you tried to make love to her," said Pootle. Victor gave his hand to the Colonel with, "I promise." Winston Dallas had not been able to keep May long to himself in the house, and to gether they joined the party on the bluff, where they quickly became acquainted with the project of the journey to Europe. "May, will you make the trip with Mr. Pootle and me?" the widow blithely asked. J: "I should be delighted," was the girlish response. "We start Saturday; and now for a pack ing of trunks." Sheeba dared not believe that the Colonel would abandon a game in which he saw a rich stake to win. He was not the gambler to throw down unplayed cards. She waited apprehensively for his next move. '"And Winnie, mjr son," and there was positive benignity in the Colonel's smile, "you may pack your trunk, too. I have a London errand for you, end you may as well improve the opportunity of pleasant com pany." "Fiend I" Sheeba muttered into the handkerchief, behind which she sought to conceal her anger. "All right, Governor," cried Winston; "I'm nothing if not obedient." "Why not come along yourself," and Pootle's never-duleet voice became a roar of jollity, "you and Mrs. Dallas and make a bang-up party?" Sheeba eagerly said: "Colonel, what do yon say to that?" and was the most nleadintr of suppliants. "I should like it above all things, but circumstances will not permit. We will await their return, and get onr pleasure from Winnie's account." Then he turned aside with Sheeba, without altering the cordial good temper of his face, but whispering with the hiss of a serpent: "And I'm gambling that he'll be glib enough, while I've tongue tied his rival, to win the heiress." ( To be continued next Sunday!) WEST POINT EIDING. The Severe and Exhaustive Prelimi nary Physical Examination. TRAINING IN THE GYMNASIUM. Eider at Home on Horseback Without Saddle or Bridle. EXERCISING WITH WOODEN HOESES rWElTTEM rOB Till DISPATCH. 1 REFERRING once more to the opinion of Mr. Theodore 1 Roosevelt, to whom I allusion was. made in f the previous paper, a ) friend and a good ) horseman, pondered '.over it a few minutes Copyright, 1SS9, by Franklin File, STRIKING A LIGHT. The Go Trouble Our Forefathers Had to Through to Mnkc a Fire. New Tork Graphic In the days before the invention of fric tion matches the difficulty of procuring fire was so great .that all pains were taken to prevent the fire on thehearthfromgoingout. All winter long it was kept by covering the coal and brands with ashes at night. This was one of the domestic cares of our fore fathers, and Homer alludes to the practice as common in his day 3,000 years ago. I5ut nre could not be kept with comfort in the summer, and there would be times in the winter when the hearth would be come cold. Then some coals must be brought from a neighbor's, or a new fire must be kindled in the house. This lntter process was usually accom plished by means of flint and steel. Most readers have no doubt seen a spark of fire struck out from a horse's shoe hitting a stone in the road, or from the shoe of a sleigh-runner grinding over rocks. To obtain fire by this method a piece of steel, such as a file or rasp, was struck with a flint or a bit of white quartz from a granite ledge, and the spark was canght in tinder charred cotton rags. The old-flint lock mnsket, with a few grains of powder and some tinder in the pan, was looked upon by our grandmothers as a domestic utensil. Sometimes, on a clear day, a burning glass a lens for collecting at one point the rays of the sun was used. The method Of producing fire by rubbing together two dry sticks is known to most boys, but it has not been often adopted by civmzeu people, 11 ueiongs 10 me ruder con ditions of life. In Thibet Captain William Gill found practiced a more scientific method than any of these. The natives strike a light by compressed air. The apparatus used con sists ot a wooden cylinder, two and a half inches long by three-quarters of an inch in diameter. This is closed at one end, the base being about the size of a quill pen; an airtight piston fits into this with a large, flat knob at the top. The other end of the piston is slightly hollowed out and a very small piece of timber is placed in the cup thus formed. To use this the cylinder is held in one hand, the piston, inserted ann pushed about half way down. A very sharp blow is then given with the palm of the hand on the top of the knob. The hand must at the same time close on the knob and instantly with draw the piston, when the tinder will be found alight. It requires skill to use the apparatus as well as science to invent it. Barbarous Surgery. New Tork Graphic Do you know what a close shave means? I never did until I looked at a face the other day through a microscope which had been treated to this luxurious process. Why, the entire skin resembles a piece of raw" beef. To make the face perfectly smooth requires not only the removal of the hair, but also a portion of the cuticle and a close shave means the removal of a layer of skin all around. The blood vessels thus exposed are not visible to the eye,but under the microscope each little quivering mouth holding a minute blood drop protests against such cruel treatment. The nerve tips are also uncovered and the pores are left un protected, which makes the skin tender and unhealthy. This sudden exposure of the inner layer of skin renders a person liable to have colds, hoarseness and sore throat. before giving utterance to his own senti ments. "Well," said he at last, "I presume Mr. Eoosevelt is right. He has had ample op portunities for observation, and, althongh it had not occurred to me before, I do not know why, with his advantages, the West Pointer should not be the best 'all round' rider." Now what are his advantages? To begin with no young man ever enters the Military Academy as a full fledged cadet until he has been stripped to the skin and most searchingly examined by three experienced surgeons. Every test that science has devised every expedient their professional knowledge can suggest is resorted to in order to detect any possible flaw in the physical condition of the can didate. If accepted, it is prima facie evi dence that the young fellow is sound in every bodily point and can Btand no end of knocking about. A TEAK OF ROUTINE. Then follows a year of incessant routine, a year in which admirable gymnastic and calisthenic training is combined with sold iery drill. Of course he has his studies, his regular hours for sleep, recreation, recita tion,, reflection, etc., but he cannot shirk his physical training. It goes on day by day under men who know their business, and at the end of his first year at the Point the young man is erect as flagstaff, but springy, nctive and sinewy as a cat Then he is in condition to learn how to ride, and until then he may never, have bestridden a horse. The instruction begins in the gymnasium in the autumn of his second year. He is placed alongside a big wooden horse; he is taught how to mount without the aid of stirrups; he is made to vault on and off from either side, from the rear (over the croup) and every way. excent nrnhahlv nwr thft head, which is an abnormal and involun tary method of dismounting that, in the case of an officer i'A a live horse, never in old cavalry days tost the rider less than a basket of champagne. When he has learned to vault on, off and completely over his wooden steed with perfect ease, then the cadet is marched to the riding hall and in troduced to his mount. There in rank aligned are some 30 cavalry horses equipped with "watering bridles," blankets and surcingles. The class silently take the positions taught them in the gymnasium, and at the command of the in structor mount as prescribed and in another movement in "column of files" the young fellows are noiselessly pacing around on the tanbark track. In few words the in structor explains how the simple snaffle rein should be held and how the legs and feet should be allowed to fall at the different turns or at the change ot gait. Then after a tew minutes quiet walking, to enable each neophyte to gain a little confidence in his new position, and to enable the instructor to correct any errors in seat or style or position of hand or elbow the backs and shoulders give him no trouble as they do our riding masters in the big cities; that is all attended to beforehand then comes the command. trqt, and the youngster who has never before bestridden a horse, or has done so only on the English saddle with the aid of stirrups and the "rise," has no adequate conception of the sensations awaiting him. AT HOME ON HORSEBACK. The system must have changed in some respects, but the basis of West Point in struction in equitation has always been to make the rider at home on horseback, without saddle or stirrups, at any and every gait; and to this end nothing was surer to settle the cadet down into a "seat;" nothing better calculated to develop the muscles of the thigh the riding muscles than the devotion of some 40 minutes of each lesson for the first eight or ten weeks to the remorseless and uncompromising trot. Civilians simply wouldn't stand it. Cadets have to and I bethink me at this moment of more than one now fast grizzling Captain of cavalry whom I have seen jogging around that quadrilateral of reddish brown with the tanbark dust on his boyish face fur rowed by tears he could neither repress nor wipe away wrung from his eyes by the pain and soreness of the third or fourth lesson yetdoggedlyandpluckily sticking to it, sure to triumph in the end. Indeed, was it not for years a tradition at the Point that one chubby young Easterner, who never un til that memorable November had straddled so much as a pony, actually broke down in his suffering and begged the instructor to "Take me off this horse?" Bnt these were rare and exceptional instances. For the first three weeks after riding begins for the 1 'roarlinff" i.lisa tho.a ... nlnr.-. .Iavah ry evolutions than to individual teaching. Nevertheless, there are long wintry months when drills cannot be conducted on "the plain," and then it is the cadet is taught the use of the saber and revolver mounted, and the riding hall is the scene for two hours a day, when the different classes ex ercise,.of a good deal of dashing horseman ship." Bunning at the heads" is capital training and develops the nerve and skill of the young troopers to a high degree. Leap ing the hurdles while cutting at leather heads on short posts or the gronnd tests their "seat" and agility to an. extent few pupils of the city schools would care to adventure without all the previous instruc- viun. BAEEBACK'ltlDINO. But almost every day, for a fer moments, saddles are stripped off and then the cadet, firt with saber and revolver perhaps, goes ack to first principles and bareback. Then it is that one sees the strong points of our school of riding, for the cadet is expected and required to accomplish, without the aid of saddle or stirrup, everything he can do with them. Indeed, it used to he the practice at the Academy in the old days to compel the students, even after saddles were issued, to "cross the stirrups," i. e. throw them over the horse's neck in front of the pommel and ride without their use for several months. It is probably still in vogue as a regular and necessary part of the teaching, but, perhaps, not for so long a time. Now any man who has ridden very much or given much thought to the subject, will be apt to admit that under such a course of training the average youth ought to become a pretty fair horseman. It is not a perfect system no doubt improvements could be suggested but taking it by and large, as the sailors say, there is a good deal of pun in it. There are men, however, who never on earth can be taught to ride either gracefully or well. There are graduates of the Military Academy who were the despair of the writer of this paper in old days when he was charged with the duty of putting them, through their paces; men naturally built "the other way" and incapable of acquiring either an easy or a secure seat. BORN HORSEMEN. On the other hand, there came every year from the West and Southwest perhaps a bakers dozen of "born horsemen" boys who had broken and tamed Texan bronchos or Kentucky scions of Lexington. The very best riders are almost always from those re gions; the very worst from the New En gland States. These are averages, mind you, and occasionally the rule finds a startling exception either way. But, having gone through three years of this sort ot training, ninety out of every hundred graduates ought to be able to mount any horse they may encounter and they are compelled to ride pretty much every itina wnue caaets ana they should be able at once to adapt themselves to any kind of saddle. There, however, is one failing point. The cadet is taught only the military seat when in saddle, and has only the McClellan tree in which to practice. He would be far more at home, therefore, in tho bare back of a horse than on an English made hunting saddle, and it is to be hoped that in the near future an oppbitunity will be given the graduating class of each year to take a turn or perhaps three or four lessons with the English saddle and bridle that they may learn the entire difference of seat and style required when they are com pelled by lorce of circumstances " to adopt that equipment. For all material and pro fessional purposes the army saddle is very well, bnt our people are taking up horse manship. Every day finds scores of ad mirably a pointed steeds and riders in the park and on the Boulevard, and, just as he drops hi3 uniform when he leaves the gar rison, so should our young officers be ready 10 iorgei tne army saddle and to swing his leg as nimbly over the pig-skin and ride it as it was made to be ridden. The West Pointer, if he choose, can far more easily do this; or ride the Texan, the California, the French, or the racing especially the racing saddle, than can the graduate of any other school of horsemanship step from the saddle ot his boyhood and ride cross conn- try" in the McClellan without losidg his stirrups. Charles Kino, U. S. A. SNOBBERY'S TRIUMPH flow Two Howling Swells Sell Purely Confidential Information. BLAKELY HALL'S DISCOVERY. President Cleveland Not Acknowledged hj the Foar Hundred. NEW lOEffS SWELLS DECIDEDLY OFF rWBITTXN TOU Till DISPATCH.! EEN as I consider myself, I was rath er startled the other day to learn in a purely acci dental way, that two of the most ex clusive and correct people i n New York society are regularly in the payof apaper there which has made a point of printing the portraits of prominent debut antes together with a lot of personal news about society people. The contribu tors in qnestion are a man and woman. They pose as terrific swells and yet both are paid by a newspaper for selling purely con fidential information. The man receives $1,200 and the woman $1,500 a year. Some time since Ward McAllister, who is more or less the arbiter of New York so ciety, announced that there were only 400 people who could properly be designated as in society in New York. The statement raised a howl, of course, for there are a mil lion or two people in this town, and at least several hundred thousand of them are well bred, well-born, well-to-do aud thoroughly above criticism in every way. To assert calmly that all these people were out of the ring and only fonr hnndred were within the charmed circle was a wonderfnllyaudacious thing to do, bnt Ward McAllister had the courage of his convictions. Pour hundred it was and four hundred H remains. He will not admit that the numberis any larger. I discovered the fact that the people who are exploiting the household affairs "of our best people" are regularly in the pay of a newspaper by a damaged package. The whom I chanced to know, came to me and said that in. carrying a package of manu script downtown in one of their small de livery wagons the contents of a marking pot had been spilled over it and the address was obscured. He had torn the parcel open to see if he could get a clew, had discovered the name of an editor, and then had called to me to see if I knew what paper the editor was connected with. I told him that the man was coming to eat luncheon with me within a half hour, and that he could wait and see him personally. A TRIUMPH OF SNOBBERY. The package was delivered when my friend called. He showed it to me. It was a list of the names of the four hundred so ciety people of New Vork. There was also a letter signed by the two Jenkinses who lurmshed the society gossip for his caper. "The fact is." the editor said, "the list may almost be said to have been revised by y..j ir.Aii.'.i.. i.:.ir t i .1 .; on to Washington. When they came acta , ally into the presence of the President and" he stepped amiably among them, they fell into a condition which a gambler indicates by the word "rattled." But they were American girls and did not promise to be conquered by embarassment. They all be gan to talk with the utmost excitement, though heaven only knows what they were talking about, and they shook hands with the President in rapid succession with FLUSHED FACE AND BEAMING ETE3. Their embarrassment grew every minute and they began to reach out and clutch for each other's hands nervously. After awhile they made a connection in this man nerand the mutual support succeeded in re storing their self-control to a small degree. One girl, in reaching out to find another one's hand, clutched a fold of the President's ample frock coat in her little fist and gripped it with the clutch of despair. She fancied she had hold of the gown of tne girl who was standing nearest to her. She was an exceedingly pretty girl, and all the time that she had been reaching around for something to cling to she was talking in the most rapid and "brilliant" fashion. Proba bly the President felt a little tug at his ' coat, for he half unconsciously glanced down and caught a glimpse of the hand there. He instantly averted his eyes. Only those who were watching the little panto mime were aware that he had seen the girl'a hand. There was a terrific babel of subdued chatfer from the young women. The Con gressman evidently thought that he had done the proper thing in giving them a good introduction, and he washed his hands of the whole affair thereafter. The Presi dent stood with a pleasant smile on his face half a minute and then began to talk quietly about Washington, its social advantages and the many ladies he had met there from the State which the Congressman represented. His voice was well modulated, dignified and eminently comforting. The girls stopped their wild chatter, and while they listened to him, gradually became composed until they felt safe to let go of one another. I wondered at the President talk ing so long to them, until I again canght s side glance of his eye toward his coat, and then I saw that he was talking to give the girl on his left a chance to release him trom the nervous grip of her small and black gloved hand. Eventually she let go of his coat and a moment later, with a sigh ot re lief, he shook hands with them all and they left the room. The girl did not know how firmly she had held Mr. Cleveland to her side. It is authentic SCIENTIFIC SCKAPS. Finally She Got the Ebb. New York Snn.3 The ways of the hen are as inscrutable as those of the woman. In a Mexican mining town the superintendent noticed the wife of the owner making repeated visits to the hen house, after each visit her face wearing a deeper look of despair and anger. "What's the matter, Mrs. Clumber?" he finally asked, when he saw that she looked almost desperate. "Matter?" she cried. "I promised the Major an omelette for supper, and I've got all the eggs I need but one, and that mean old hen is sitting there and won't lay it. I daren't touch her, and she knows it, and is just taking her time abqpt it, too. I'm so indignant at her, mean old thing." But the egg was laid in time. 'yearling" class there are always a dozen young fellows so sore and lame that they cannot attend drills. But they have to go on with the riding. It is the hair of the. do? that cures the bite; and after the first month the flesh of the inner thighs, hitherto soft, becomes tough and firm, and in three months of this sort of work "sole leather wouldn't be a circumstance," was the way one of them expressed it. Day after day in the big, gloomy old riding hall, the lessons go on, and gradually, as elasticity and confidence are gained, the gymnastics begin that add to the grace and rise of the rider. First while at the walk, then at the trot, the instructor requires his pupils to practice snch movements as the following: Raise both feet until at height of the knees, bending leg to rear. Throw right leg over horse's neck, and sit side ways. Throw left leg over horse's neck, etc. Sitting in the natural position bend back ward until the head and shoulders rest on the horse. Of course the natural position is resumed after riding a few minutes in each position, but only at the command of the in structor. NO INDIVIDUAIi VOLITION. There can be no individual volition in the matter. Unless excused by the surgeon on acconnt of some temporarily severe disabil ity every member ot the class must do his level best to accomplish every one of the prescribed exercises. Then follow others: Leap from the horse on the left side and vault on again without checking him: Do the same on right side. Leap to the ground on either side and then vault completely over him to the other. Vault again into seat. In all these exercises the reins must never be lost, and, if the instructor be very watchful, never unduly lightened. That is a matter wherein many riders, in and out of West Point, require constant coaching. Then in course of the spring months comes the leaping of the bar and the hurdle, all taught with the snaffle bit and withont the saddle. Also a few lessons in wrestling on horseback, picking up caps and handker chiefs from the ground, and finally before the cadet goes on his long-anticipated fur lough when half through the course, a les son or two with the saddle and "curb" bridle, so as to enable the young gentleman to know something of those items in case he should be invited to ride. Two more years of drill and instruction follow, but these are more devested to caval- The Congress of Americanists, composed of some of the most distinguished scientists of Europe engaged in the stndj of the prehistoric nations of America, which recently completed a very important and successful session in Ber lin, voted to meet in Washington In 1800. In several cities in Germany, notably Berlin and Hamburg, the experiment Is being mado Of a compound for paving purposes, the princi pal Ingredient of which is India rubber. As far as heard from, this paving is very satisfac tory, althongh no facts are given as to cost. The India rnbber combines some elasticity with durability, is not aifected by heat or cold, and in particular dues not become slippery when wet, as does asphalt. The roadway over the Goethe bridge in Hanover is also said to have been paved with this compound, and to havo been found very satisfactory. The Export Society of Germany has decided to build the "Floating Exhibition Palace of Germany," having raised 6,C00,O0O marks for the purpose. It proposes to build a ship to be called the Kaiser Wilhelm, which will be tho work of German shipyards. According to plans, the ship will be 661 feet long, 65 feet wide and 46 feet deep. It will have four en gines propelling as many screws. The material will be principally German steel. Tho cost of a two ears' tour Is estimated at 3,150,000 marks. The income from the rented space 1,000 to 1,200 marks for each booth and from sales will be, it is thought, at least 7,200,800 marks, leav ing a balance of illO.SOO, or over 2,000,C0n marks annually a prettv sum on the page of the ledger. Emperor 'William, it is said, has promised his aid to the enterprise, and it is hoped that the vessel will sail from Hamburg on her first voyage in the spring of 1890. Scientific American. Hypnotism thrives in Washington. Two gentlemen interested in psychological studies, Mr. W. A. Croffnt, executive, officer of the Geological Survey, and Governor N.J. Cole man, Commissioner of Agriculture, give oc casional soirees hypnotiqucs. at which they hypnotize numbers ot "sensitives." During some recent experiments by Mr. Croffnt, two yonng ladies, temporary victims of the hypnotic hallucination, were taken into an imaginary picture gallery and tbere left, while the operator turned his attention to a yonng man who was engaged in the dangerous pastime of catching crocodiles. On returning to the ladies, Mr. C'roffut found that he could not make them cognizant of his presence. They aia noi appear 10 see mm, or near nn voice, and when he stood directly in front of them they took no notice of him whatever. It was a new and somewhat alarming experience, and a quarter of an hour passed before the hypnotizer re-established his domination and brought them back from the land of dreams. Science. Dr. C. YAnosnrvSKi contributes to the Russkaya Mcdilsina a long article on the state of tho medical profession in Russia. He points out that there are only 18,000 doctors for a pop ulation of 100,000,000, or one medical man to every 6,500 persons. This number of doctors in proportion to the population is very much less than in other European countries, yet the des titution among members of the profession is alarming. Of late tbere have been numbers of suicides of medical men who were without the bare necessaries of life. The fees for medical attendance are very low. Still, In Odessa, 40 per cent of the whole population and 94 per cent of the very poor died withont having had medical attendance. A similar state of affairs exists at Kostrome. Dr. Yaroshevski attributes this deplorable condition of things to the ignor ance 01 me itussian people, wno preier 10 con sult soothsayers and magicians ratber than educated medical men. to the monopoly en joyed bv the pharmacists, and to the large num ber of Feldsbers who are allowed to practice. Tho Feldihers are men who have some rough knowledge of snrgery and the use of a few drugs. They are generally men who have served in the ambulance corps or have been hospital attendants, and on the strength of this slight knowledge they are licensed to practice. Ward McAllister himself. to the last degree." It struck me as being a triumph of snob bery and I said as much. "Possibly it is," said the editor carelessly, "but this is what people want, and as long as they want it we are willing to dish it out to them, since it puts money in our pockets. The list would be worth 51,000 or more to any dflilv naner." Then we went to luncheon and X heard so ciety discussed frontward, backward and in every possible direction for nearly two hours. The old position of amiable indiffer ence which the press formerly maintained toward society people and social events has given way almost entirely to a slavish and eulogistic attitude that is similar to the at titude of the minor English papers toward royalty. The effeot of all this adulation and attention is easily seen in the growing ex clusiveness of the four hundred. Once the revised and carefully selected list of names is published it will be on file in every news paper office in the country, and the four hundred will have an additional glamour thrown over their names. They are the names, by the way, that were worn in most instances a few generations ago by black guards, pork butchers, grocers, ragmen, hat ters and outcasts, but to-day they are the little tin idols of the town. CALLING AT THE WHITE HOUSE. Mr. Cleveland, 1 was informed by a so ciety man a short time ago, was never recog nized by the four hundred. And yet he had an admirable manner at times in the White Honse. 1 remember the first day I went in to see him, he succeeded in calming the excitement of five young women from the West by the exercise of tact and thought fulness. Meeting the President is frauzht with so much ceremony that the most indif ferent of visitors is apt to be impressed be fore he actually gets into the presence of the President himself. On this particular oc casion I had been in Colonel Lamont's inner office for an hour when the President sent word that he was ready to receive the callers of the day. The Secretary notified one of his assistants and then turned to me and asked me if I would not like to go in with the crowd and see how it was done. I nodded, and he opened a side door which admitted me into a large reception room. I had got through by a short cut, but there was a small crowd ahead of me. Among others were several Congress men, an ex-general of the; army, and a lot of ladies very showily dressed and chatter ing in excited whispers. One of the secre taries was wandering around the room shak ing hands with the Congressmen he hap pened to know, and he was 'just about to usher a section of visitors into the Presi dent's private room when Postmaster Gen eral Dickinson came in, bowed to the two or three people and swaggered into the Presi dent's room. This was a bitter disappoint ment to us all, for it meant a long delay,but after all a Cabinet Minister has the call over outsiders. Meanwhile the whispers resolved themselves into an everyday tone of voice, and the excitement dropped into a subdued melancholy. After a long wait the Post master General left the President, and then eight or ten of us moved into the President's room, and arranged ourselves more or les3 in the order of precedence in chairs that were in an irregular semi-circle. Ail we needed was an end man to make the illusion complete. HOW GROVER 13 BORED. OLD TIMES RECALLED. The ceremony of seeing the President nowadays recalls an old-time President's fashion of receiving guests who called at the White House. When George Jones, who had just started the New York Times, called at the White House he was informed that President Jackson was at home. Thereupon he went upstairs to the big room on the second floor, and there obtained a magnifi cent view of the back of the President's head. The Executive was sitting in front of a grate fire, with his heels on the mantel piece and his hat balanced over his eyes. He had slid down on the chair until his head was almost out of sight and be was smoking a long clay pipe. The Secretary and tha caller approached him from behind, and tho Secretary said: "Mr. President, this is Mr. George Jones of New York." Without turning his head or turning1 around the President put hi3 hand over his right shoulder and Mr. Jones laid his own palm in it confidingly. The President gave his hand a hearty shake and said in a cor dial voice: "How d' do son? Pull up a cheer." Society is filled with delight at the pros pect of a brilliant season in Washington, as the resnlt of the incoming administration. Mrs. Morton's position among the 400 is as sured. She will be a very important factor in the social life at the National capital, and, while Mrs. Cleveland's beauty will be missed, her place will soon be filled'. Society continues to grow and wax big in its own estimation as the criticisms become more and more severe. Perhaps the most bitter of all complaints are those that are made against New York society men. They are stigmatized as the most snobbish, ill-bred and thoroughly disagreeable men in New York. It is an unquestioned fact that snob bery is rampant in New York among the SALLOW-FACED ANGLOMANIAC3 who pose as the younger element of the 400. A society man of London, Paris, Vienna or any other great city of the world, is above all a man of good breeding and good man ners. A society man in New York is dis tinguished solely by his lack of these very qualities. I have tnought of the qnestion a good deal during the past week because it has fallen in my way to read a lot of I"tters written by a distinguished Austrian colonel who has been visiting this countryfor thepast sic months. His letters on New York so ciety are to be published in Paris and prob ably by "Figaro." He sent the first of his letters to that journal two months ago, and immediately received a letter asking for a series of six or eight "studies." He began at once and his impressions are now finished. He asked me to read them because he was afraid that he must have made some misstatements, and, unlike most foreigners, he wanted to be accurate. The letters were sharp, caustic and incisive. They formed the bitterest arraignment of New York society that I have ever read, but thev do not underestimate the case, as far as my own experience goes. One may expect courtesy in an Irish cabin, in a London draw ingroom or taphouse, anywhere within tha broad domain of France or Germany, and in all sections of America except where civili zation is supposed to be at its highest point at the very apex of New York society. It i s there that the snobs congregate and reach, their highest development. Blakely Hat.t ERRORS AT THE ALTAR. Some Ludicrous Mistaken Made by Agitated and Absent Minded Pairs. Chamber Journal.! Timothy Duggan was a stevedore, per-. hap3 6 feet 2 inches in height and propor-j tionately broad. He appeared as a bride groom; the bride was a charming young; person offender years. All went well until the moment came Tor Timothy and his bride to give their troth to each other in the prescribed manner. "Say after me," said I to Timothy, " 'I, Timothy' " There was no response. "Say after me," repeated the parson, '"I TJmothy- Timothy was Chronic Plenrisr Cured. L. E. Callen, Garfield, Pawnee county, Kas., writes: "I have been for some years troubled with pleuretic pains in my left side, which come on in the beginning ot winter, and are so severe that I am confined to the house. During the past winter I used two Allcock's Plasters on mv left side, and after the first week all pain left me and I was perfectly able to attend to my business. After wearing them two weeks I would wash them off with a little alcohol and then go two or three weeks perfectly welL I have only bad to put tbem on three times dar ing the past winter, and must say Allcock's Plasters are all that tbey are represented to be." au The President was standing at the win dow as we entered, intently reading a letter. He paid no attention whatever to the crowd until everybody was seated, and then look ing up he dropped the letter on a deslCand stepped forward toward the right end of the horseshoe. His manner was dignified and solemn. The General, who was one of the first to rise, stepped forward and the Presi- dent took his hand warmly and talked abont the weather, the adjournment of Congress and the condition of the roads about Wash ington. Then he put oat his hand again just as the General had started in on a long story, shook it warmly und passed the old soldier cheerfully out into the ante-room. The Western Congressman came forward at this moment with the five young ladies clus tering around bim. "Mr. President," he said in an oracular tone, "these ladies are from mv State. This is my niece. This is my daughter, and these," he added, pointing them out with hi. long forefinger, "are personal friends of the girls," The young women had been waiting for nearly an hour and a halt.and they had high appreciation of the importance of the Presi dent of the United States; they had proba bly looked forward to the event all the way still silent, a puzzled look creeping over his board face. "Say after me," said I for tho third time, with, perhaps a shade of annoy ance. "After you, sir," responded Timothy, with the politest possible duck of his bul let head. I remember one bridegroom who had brought a very charming bride to church, and perhaps regarded her as a thing of beauty to be in his home a joy forever, rendering "to have and to hold" as "to have and behold." Another, who possibly had some cause to dread the fate of Mr. Caudle, struck out an entirely new version, and faithfully promised "to have and be told." "To love and to cherish" is another stumbling block. "To love and be cherries" was the nearest to the original of many varia tions popular among the males of that parish. The brides were happy with the familiar rendering, "to love cherries and to bay." "God's holy ordinance" tripped up many. "Holy orders" was convenient, and perhaps conveyed the most meaning. 'Plight thee my troth" and "give thee my troth" were, I imagine, words of foreign sound, and I well remember one young person, who was wedding a most villainous looking fellow, changing her sentiment into "thereto I give thee my throat." There was, perhaps, an unconscions prophecy wrapped up in that promise. If Gnilty of Asinnlt and Battery Upon your stomach with blue pill, podyphyllln or other rasping purgatives positively despair of helping your liver. Violence committed upon your inner man will do no good. Real help, prompt and thorough, is to be found In the wholesome anti-bilious medicine, Hos tes ter's Stomach Bitters, which Is, moreover, pro-,"" ductive ot happy results in malarial disease.'i rheumatism, dyspepsia, nervousness and kidney - -troubles. - - ' ' " ' ' ' - ' i