Peck's Bad Boy and Hie Fa
THE BOY SAVES HIS PA'H LIFE. —THE
OI.D MAN M ABU Kg THE WKONO
(ItRI. ON THE CABS.
"Your pa got over being scared out
of his boots T" saol the groceryman to
the ha ib>y as 1 took up u ban Iful
of hickory nuts and begun cracking
them between a couple of five pound
weights on the couuter.
"What do you mean? Who told
you pa had been scared ?" asked the
boy us he put his thumb in his mouth,
after knocking the uail off with a
weight. "I didn't know as anybody
knew anything about it but me and
the £irl,''
'"O, a brakeman that ruus ou the
Chicago train was in here this morn
ing and he told me your pa came up
n the traiu last night, ami along
there about Kenosha he weut through
the train as though he had been kick
ed, and got into the juutal car ami
crawled under a lot of mail sacks and
rode all the way to Milwaukee, sweat
ing like a butcher, and as pale as a
ghost. What was it all about? You
haveu't been playing another trick ou
him, have you ?'" aud the groceryman
picked up the hickory nuts the boy
had left and threw theui iu the basket,
while the boy wrap|>ed a handkerchief
around bis thumb ami looked mad.
"No, I didn't play anything on him,
but I saved bis lite. He is an old
emarty, ami got himself iuto a scrape.
You see pa and me went down to
Chicago ou a pass pa got somehow iu
politics. We took in the battle of
Gettysburg, where a fellow can Aee all
about war without getting shot iu the
back. We came hack ou the five
o'clock traiu, ami of course pa couldn't
set with me, but bad to go and sit
down iu the seat with a girl that was
alone. I'a hw-n't got any more sense
than a cow about such things. A girl
dou't want un old duffer to sit with
her. What she wants is a young fel
ler, that has got bear's oil on his hair,
and smells sort of drugstore like.
But pa thiuks he is just as eiitertain
iug as when he was young, and if he
went into a car where all the seats hut
one was vacant, and that one had a
girl in it, he would go up to her in his
insinuating way, and take oil his plug
bat and show bis bald head and say,
'Miss, is this seat engaged ?' and be
fore she had time to say anything he
would sit down with her and la-gin
talking about something she didn't
care any more about than she would
about the process of embalming Kgvp
tian mommies. Well, pa sat down by
a girl who wa9 knitting, and he h- gau
to talk sweet. He said he was a trav
eling mau, getting six thousand dol
lars a year and a share of the profi's.
He found fault with the railroads, the
cart, the hotels, and everything, ami
to hear hint talk you would h::>k be
was reared in a palace, alvays truveU-d
on special cars, and was worth eleven
million dollars. 1 sat behind him,
and heard what he said, and it was all
I could do to keep from asking him if
he thought ma would be expecting us
home to-night, but I have had exjwri
ence enough with |>a to know that
when he is engaged in business that
cause* his brain to expand and throb,
that the safest way is to keep still.
He told the girl she was purty, and
asked her all about herself, aud if she
was going far, and he put his arm on
the back of the seat, and acted as
though he was going to hug her, but
he didn't, cause just as his arm began
to get real near to the girl's small of
her hack, I imitated the brakeman
and shouted, 'Like Forrest,' and pa
thought the brakeman was right be
hind him, and he drawed his arm
away so quick he hit the funny hone
of his elbow on the bark of the seat
and it hurt him like everything. The
girl laffed, ami pa blushed, and in a
little while he had his arm there again.
The conductor and the brakeman
watched pa. and just as he got close to
the girl, and was whispering to her,
the conductor touched him on his
shoulder and asked him what the
number of hi* pass was. Pa had to
take his arm awav to get his pas-, and
then he put it back again, and was
commencing where he left off, to give
the girl some taffy, when the brake
man touched pa on the shoulder, and
asked him if it was his dog in the
baggage car, chewing the hinges off
the trunks. Pa said he didn't have
no dog. and the brakeman went away.
The girl waa real disgusted with pa,
and I could see she wanted to have a
rest. Just before the train got to
Waukegan the girl said she wanted to
•end a dispatch to Racine, and |>a
gave her aome paper and he wrote a
message and asked pa to aend it for
her. Pa didn't want to leave hi* scat,
•o he said to me, 'Here, little boy, you
get off at Waukegan and nend this
message for the beautiful young lady,'
and he gave me the dispatch ana a
dollar. I went out at Waukegan, and
read the message and didn't send it.
It read like this, 'Father, come down
to the depot with a horse whip. There
is n old drunkard on the train who
ha* made himself very obnoxious to
me, and I want you to maul him with
in an inch of hi* life.' Well I wouldn't
contribute to pa'* being mauled, no I
kept it. and after the train left Wau
kegan I called pa into the other cud
of the car and told him I didn't think
it waa beat to aend that dispatch, ao I
kept it. He waa mad in a minute and
to" me I had no right to think any
. jg. When I waa told to do a thing
it was my taurines* to do it, and aak
no question*. I!e said ho was ashamed
of nte, and told me when the train got
to Kenosha to go right out and aend
it quick. lie WHS going to atari hack
to talk with the girl some more when
I handed him the dispatch, and told
him to read it, aud then if he wanted
mu to send it 1 would. He read it,
and bin face got aw white a* chalk,
and the few hairs on his head raised
right up so they were stiff enough to
tack down a carpet with, and big
drops of perspiration stood out AII
over his face, and his collar just wilted
right down, and he was not half as
tall as before. 'Dou't say anything
about this,' he said in a whisper. 'I
know the clerk in the mail car, gnd
he has often wanted me to ride with
him, and I guess 1 will go in there.
There is not air enough in this car.'
Pa went forward HIMIUI us sudden as
you often see an old man go while a
train is in motion, and I went and sat
down behind the girl. I said to her,
'The old party who sat with you has
goue out to ride on the cowcatcher to
j get cooled off.' She said she wished
Ihe would fall otr and get left. 1 ask
| ed her if the old mat) was her pa, and
she said he was an old fool, and 1
agreed with her and we hid quite a
nice visit. I think if old people would
keep out of the way, and not be so
fresh, young people could have more
fun. I sat down in the seat with her,
and got real well acquainted, and
when she got off t Racine, I helped
her off, and I could imagine pa in the
| postal car just a sweating. Well, pa
I didn't show up till we got to Milwau
kee, and theu he caiue out of the side
door of the postal car nil tnu*aed up,
i and smelling mildewed like old sacks.
| He asked me if I noticed any unusual
i commotion at Racine, and I told him
1 there was nothing special, only there
was an old prize lighter on the depot
steps with a black-nuke whip, and lots
of people seeming to ex[>ect a row,
| and I guessed the girl sent another
j dispatch. Pa shivered and said, 'Let
i this he a warning to you. my boy, not
o ever allow any female strangers to
get acquainted with you. and become
familiar.' I told pa I didn't see any
i harm in it, cause I rode all the way
with that girl, after he left, and she
'seemed to like it, and never once
1 thought of having me horse-whipped.
Pa is getting calm again, hut it will
he a long lime before his hair lays
down smooth again, the way it did he
' fore he got scared."
"Well, your pa is a la-la,'' said the
i groceryman, "and ought to be kept
locked up as a monk iu a monkery,
| somewhere." The had boy agreed
s that a monkery was about the pre
scription his pa needed, and he went
out and caught on behind a cutter and
was tipped off in the slush, and went
home to run himself through a clothes
; wringer. Ptrl's Sun.
Oabrlel's Bloat.
Smie year* ago, in (Jeorgia, that
baad of Christians known a* A seen
sionists were having a grand revival.
One day wh en the meeting was HI TULL
force a storm came up, and a young
! gentleman who was out hunting with
, his servant took refuge iu the church
door. Being curious to see the service,
the two hunters crept up into the gal
lery, aud there hid in a place where
they could observe without being ob
, served.
"Come, I/vrrl, come ; our rolies are
| ready. Come, F/ord come," cried the
j preacher, while all present gave a loud
i "Amen."
"Marsa CJabe," whispered Cuffv,
lifting his hunting horn to his mouth,
"let me gib demjust <>ne tool."
"Put that horu dolrn, or I'll break
your head," replied the master in a
I whisper.
The horn dropped by Cuffy' side,
and again the minister cried : "Come,
Ixird, come; we are all ready for Thy
coming. Come, Lord, come."
"Do, Marsa (Jabe —do jit lemme
gih 'em jit one little toot," pleaded
Cuffv, witling his lip and raising the
bora.
"It you don't drop that horn. Cuffy,
I II whip ynu within an inch of your
life, whispered the eiasjiernted mas
ter.
"Blow, Gabriel, blow , we are ready
for Hiacomiog. Blow, Gabriel, blow,'
pleaded the minister.
Cuffy could no longer iesist the
temptation, and sent a wild peal ring
ing from end to end of the church;
but long Iwfore its last echo died away
his master and himself were the only
occupant* of the building.
"I s ready fur de licking, Marsa
Gabc," said Cuffy, showing every tooth
in hi* head, "for I 'clare to graciou*
it's worf two lickings to see de way
comtnon farm cattle kin git obrr de
ground wid sheared 'Seeunionists be
hind dem."
"I NOTICE, <reorge, that you always
get back to the office early after going
to dinner. What i* the reason ?" "Ob,
that'* easily explained. 1 take my
meals in a boarding house."—.Sewer
ville Journal.
"Do you lielieve in laying on
band ?" asked a parishioner of the
clergyman. "Certainly I do," be re
nlied, "but if your child ia very bad
I would advise you to try a shingle."
—N. Y. Journal.
W K beard of a man the other day
wbo was aaid to be mean enough to
•teal a coat of paint. But he can't
equal the party who triad to atoal a
dog's pants.
How She Eecapcd
A PROFESSION AI, M AMI KK WHO OOT
BVDI.Y 1.1% FT.
Hhe was a handsome young woman.
This wa remarked by a dozen differ
ent. people as she entered the union
depot. Hhe was going eaat. This was
remarked by a conceited young snip
of a fellow who looked "mashed from
the crown of his hat to the heels of
his gaiters. Hhe had uo sooner pur
chased her ticket ami taken a scat
than he began to circle around. Hhe
•aw him and read his character, and
beckoning him to approach, she asked :
"Are you going to Buffalo?"
"Yes —ah—certainly."
"1 am glad to hear it. Will you do
me a favor ?"
"Withall mv heart. Command me?*'
"I'm afraid my truuk was left at
the hotel. Couln I ask you to run up
and see about it?"
"Of course—certainly—only too
happy."
It was twenty minutes to train time.
, He was back iu sixteen, bis face flush-
I ed, his ears red and his breathing
spasmodic. He had done some tall
running. The trunk was not there.
* Oh, dear, but would you be so kind
as to look into the baggage room ?''
He would. He did. He ended a
score of trunks around, made a do*n
inquiries for a Saratoga with an "E"
jon the ends, and finally returned to
the waiting room to say :
But she wasn't there! The train
was also gone! A man who had a
sore throat and felt mad at the whole
world informed hiin that he had no
sooner started for the baggage room
than she picked up her reticule and
I laiurdcd 1 lie tiuin, her lace wealing a
happy smile and her rosebud mouth
gently puckered up as she hummed
1 "The chap I left behind me."
"And it look* to me," added the ill
natuied invalid, "MM it it was a put-up
Ijob to choke off your society."
"Hangel if it wasn't!" gasped the
Other, as he sat down to rest his knees,
i TrUgmm.
"In TII K gentleman of the bouse iu?"
he asked.
"Yea, sir; be air."
"Can 1 see him a moment?"
"No, sir, you cau't see a bole nor
hair of 'im !"
"Why can't I. madam?" 1 would
like to *|>eak to him on boaiuess."
"If you was a dyin' an' Jim was the
only doctor in l>akoty, you couldn't
I sot an eye on him till he gives in an'
talks decent. At dinner a while ago
; he told me to piuw 'im the apple *•>**,
I an' 1 told him it wasn't *•, hut sass,
an' he said he koowed Iw-itrr, it wa
•oss, an' I told him that w'eri he ttik a
notion that a little apple aasa'd feel
jsoothiu' to hia stomack to say so, an'
|he said he'd have that soet er die.
I when I tol' him I'd defend that s&*
Tith my life, an' made a break for the
i shot gun, an' he made a break up
through the scuttle inter the loft.
W eo his senses come to him an" be
gives in that sate is ease be kin cum
down, hut if he makes a break afore
that, iff goes the top of hi* head,
j Thar set* the a*, strai ger, an' thar's
Jim up in the lott, an' that's the way
the matter stauda jisl new, an' I reckon
you'd fetter mosey along an' not get
mixed inter this row !''
As the the gentleman moved awav
tie heard her voice saying .
"Jim, w en you get tired o'yer durn
bolto' u' want this sass, j>-$' squeal
out
Aud a gruff voire from the dark
.ome garr-'t rcqninded
"Sons!"
LrrnKAKY conversation a' a fash
onahle reception. Mr. Hpidloe, hav
ng lain introduced to Miss Zagw-.-11,
i *ny*:
"Vcrv fine *emblage."
"Very, and quite literary, too."
"Very. You are fond of literature,
J I presume ?"
"Ah, very. I dote on it."
| "You like Hhakewp*are I dare sav.' !
' Ah, very much. Do you?"
"Very fond of him ; I like Burns,
loo."
"Ho do I, very much indeed."
"Do you like Goldsmith ?*'
"Very, very much. Do you like
' Byron ."
"Think he's grand. Do yon like
Pope v '
"Oh, very moch. Do you like Shel-
Icy ?"
"Oh, yes, he.'* good. Tell you a
good writer.''
I "Who?"
"Milton."
"Yen, he is very good, indeed."
Afterwards, Mr. Hpidloe, iu speak
ing of the young lady, say* that she'ia
wonderfully well read, and she, in
• peaking of him, says : "Ob, he'a just
read everything."— Terns Si/tings.
m + 1 ■
A PirraßUMH darkey was struck
a terrific blow upoo the head with a
whole brick yesterday. The stricken
on* didn't say a word until he had
carefully gathered into bit hat every
fragment of the unfortuoate brick,
when he calmly remarked to bis as
sailsut, "Dcae yer fragments is each
wuff a day fur you in de workhouse.
You can't 'suit my feelin's wid iofum
ity, I can tall ysr, boss!"
Ax exchange asks : "What are our
young men doing P' We can't answer
for the rewt of the country, but around
bere they are engaged mainly in try
ing to lead a nine-dollar existence on
n aeven dollar salary.— Hot Springs
News.
A New Version
"Darling," said he, tenderly encir
cling her slender waist with his lar
board arm, "can you tell me in what
res|n-ct you resemble Mary, of little
lamb fame?"
"N<>, I cannot, dear Harry," blush
ing one of those western sunset blush
es thai betoken cold weather.
"Because," said he, as he tenderly
stroked her golden hair, "because you
have a pet that loves you so."
"Ami now,dear Henry,can you tell
me why vou are like Mary's lamb?"
"No, (fear; why am I?"
"Because," said she, glancing nerv
ously towards the door, "because you
are sure to go. I hear papa coming
down stairs, and you know—"
Where the Difficulty Was
"Then you love me truly, Elvira ?"
"Yes, yes, my darling; truly, most
truly."
"And in spite of poverty ?"
"What matters mere wealth, when
compared to the bliss of your noble
love ?"
"Thanks, thanks, mv beloved, you
have rendered n>e unspeakably happy."
"I would rather be your wife and
live iu a cottage than dwell in the
palace of a prince !"
"Bless you, bless you, my own—
but"—
"But what ?"
"Bjt I haven't the cottage I''—F.x
A THAMI' printer visited The Boomc
rung office Monday, in search of work;
got none, hut received some money.
Later in the day a tramp wutchtnaker
took in the jewelry stores about the
city in search of work ; got u ne, hut
received some money. Toward even
ing a tramp shoemaker made (lie
round of the cobblers in search of
work ; got none, but received some
money. I.asl night a tramp —drunk
us he could well be—occupied a chair
iu a down town grog shop. It was the
printer, the watchmaker ami the cob
bler.— Boomerang,
A CO.WDITTOR on the "Branch,"
who was collecting fare, came to a
lady and repeated, mechanically
"Miss, your fare!"
"Sir!" exclaimed the young lady,
somew hat confused.
"I say your fare I"
"Well, that's what the young men
•ay in Atchison; but coming from a
stranger, I —"
"Oh, ah I I mean your ticket," said
hinkbiue, more cuufuiwd than the
young lady.
"On, ( hawles," sighed the poetical
Mias Kav-lle, "I yearn for the balinv
spring, when I cau hie tneto the verrf
ant lawn and bathe in the mellow rave
of the setting sun !" "I would bathe
in something more sultstantia!, and
not make it quite so public I" said the
poaaic young man.
"Tilts apple butter is working,"
said a boarder to hia laudladv.
"Well, if it is, sor, that's more'n ye
are doin',and thesoouer ye be workin"
an' pays me up some of yer hack
board the better it'll be fur me."
A NEWPORT small bov while climb
t ing up to the top shelf of the cu|r
board to hook soma cake fell down
I and broke his left arm. Moral
j Mothers who hide cake from their
' young ones should keep a step-ladder
, near by.
TLLF, man who is most strenuously
j opposed to horizontal reduction is the
| young fellow in the new trousers, who
slipped down in the middle of the M-Nl
browu iry street just as he was SIKHII
tipping hi* hat to n twohundred-thou
! -and dollar heiress.
IT isn't always t<> be tak<n for
j granted that a young man is extra de
votional beraiie his trousers hag at
the knee-, any more than it is to-be
assumed that a woman's piety can be
gauged by the amount of gilt upon
; her prayer-book.
A Wg baby with four feet ha*
been born in a Georgia town. If she
live* and her |>edal extremities should
prove to be of the frigid brand, some
poor, prattling boy infant of today
has a dark future ahead of him.— Bis
riarrk Tribune.
INDUSTRY.—-"You come begging
around here every day. Why don't
you go to work?" "I do work some
times." "Where did you work laat?"
"Down at the hotel this morning. The
rook gave me some cold sausage and
I made short work of iu"
A Bt'siNRHH Maw.—"Do you know
Blinks V "Yes." "Well, what do
you think of him?" "Not much; he
attends to everybody's business but bis
own." "He's laxy, too, isn't he?"
"Yes, he's so alow that he cannot even
catch a cold."
A Poshtkd BOY..— "Johnny," said
the editor to his hopeful, "ara you in
the first class at scnool ?" "No," re
plied the youngster, who had studied
the paternal sheet, "I ara registered as
second-class male natter."
"<.'*N you tell me," asked a Sunday
school tear her of • liule girl, "why
the Israelites made a golden cwlfP*
"Because they hadn't gold enough to
make a cow," waa the reply.
Now that Laat ia here the codfish
ball baa replaced the diamond pin aa
an article of fashion.
<H> CALL
"o us an 1 re- eive a < opy of
IKW A!W BEAUTIFUL
ALMANAC FOR 1884.
It contains information that may save you huudreds of dollars and c •#!•
you nothing.
GIVEN AWAY AT
GREEN'S PHARMAC'f,
Bush House Block,
Bellefonte, Pa.
We have Telephone Connection.
I). (i arm 'in l .v>i '* Set / .Store.
Gar man & Son. Vwai A
L A DIEM,
do not think, because the cuts repre
sent only gentlemen's wear, that we
have not been particularly careful to
select an elegant line of goods especi
ally suited to yon. You will find it
to your adrantage to call and if w#-
are not able to supply you from our
choice and variid stock, it will IK- a
a email matter for us to order what you
may need. We think we arc In tier al>i
to meet your wants than soy store in
Bellefonte.
SEC II I. EH <t CO., Grocers, Hash House Work, HeUef*nie, I'a.
NEW GOODS
Fob THE
SPRING ami SUMMER TRADE!!
We have endeavored to get the very best of every thing in our line, ami now
have some really CHOICE GOODS.
FIXE CREAM CHEESE, Extra Large FRENCH BRI NKS.
SELECT 0 VST EES, SWEET POTATOES,
LARGE KITE CHAXRERI!IES, PRVXELLES, IMPERIAL FIGS,
HEIGHT NEW LEMONS, FLORIDA ORANGES,
Prince** Paper-Shell Almonds, Evaporated DRIED PFACHKs
A FULL LINE OF CHOICE CANNED FRUITS.
PRESERVED PEARS, PEACHES, I'LVMS and PRVNELLFS
PL AIX CANDIES, FINE CONFECTIONERY,
—AND
GOODIESof all Sorts and Kinds
Bar We invite the people of Centre county to call and inspect our NICE
GOODS, which cannot fail to please.
llf SKCHLEK CO.
V p&rty la politico, a:: aay net la rt'igioa
TIIK ORF ATRAT ANtlTtlK BKMT,
THK I.AR'iK fMII'RLK W KKRI.T,
UKLIOIOtIt MD IBTrl. AR
NEW YORKJBSERVEH
Ewt.klUhwd 1H83.)
Jfo rwpr in Hi i nnirj bora in .1. iimuirikin
ill) ooOfO of Enrmoa IT Irrnwoa Prim. .tandi at
LB. bawd S I tkt odilnrlal fral.rnllj I>l| KIT L.ttara and
odltoriala Mill rtirkh (h* ilhitii. Othar among lu
adltrm ho* had tb iiVfini of a quarto of a rottlory
for Uoir work.
Til Onwa*a*w*t>wtt of th Omnni afo troaa oil
aada . Hf Ika oawa, rarofall) prwjiarod fr.wi l.ttm
and IflMTilH. fnrelablng a rawtplata tirw of lha coo.
dlttofl of Olf work aarh *#k.
Tkf Drpanaaut of Aoiiovxtc**, Rt-amaaa, frmt
Arttaot TBirftwo m) Rauotava wnag mmmMl
•Iport), wfcn writ* rlaorlf Mil to Ibr (W.l til Tbr Oa
aiaraa doaaawt All fto rolniaaa with loan mh|i and
•Id Wl D, bwt tlw to bo
A LIVE NEWSPAPER.
gtflag nmj work o Rritmoi * Aatrr foil of Inrtrar
Unno, nnn|Mml and troth, and o (mil lain
omtoiotM bll tkf now, ngnnraa rononu upoa rar
rowta ataoki atf ■ ftwoi ranolf of rboKw trading
Tko prho jo RK 11 a frwr for ooOa nm w Iff
w-tlaota wo glta IH dollar rotamlaaten of a npj tko
"IUMII Imtai. u rl.gaatlr brood rolumaof Ado
pagan. rwtttalnlag • pnrtrwlt of tkaaotkar Mtapl*
orjloa of tk Oaaaana 011 l braaat to any oddroaa fraw.
Now York OWrvof.
31 e 39 Park Row, N. 1.
MM.
—LowMtprioM. Kvrrytbinf n*w and
bwh, l lUrtnan . . .
' I
•
FORKS HOUSE
Coburn, Centre Co., Pa.
GOOD MEALS.
CLE Ay BEDS.
PRICES MODERATE.
; •MTIIOTEL WITHIN TWO MIN
I UTES* WALK TO STATION
Good Stable A room m/da f too
i Eioellent Hunting and Fishing ground*
quit* nesr thin Hotel.
JOS. KLECIMKB - Prop'r.
ÜBS. A. E. SEIBERT
j WoaM T tc III* IMia* of S!Mbst M 4 Tktolf
J lbt b !• | r. ( tr d to 4•
DRESS MAKING '
In the eery Latest City Style*, and with
Xtutneat and Ihtpatrk
sum la KUXAV lAll 90001.
Combing* made to order.
Finking don* on short notice
Stamping in French OU • Bpooinlty.
I em Also Agent for the Oelehreteti
Drew Ushers' MAGIC SCALK.
Mr, A. E. SEIBERT,
. No. 11 Allegheny St.,
H>*. BeHefonto, Ps.
x