TUOLT TOPICS.
New York oity is to have a " Ladles'
Co-operative Dress Association," the
object fit which is to establish a co
operative store stocked with ladies' and
children's dress goods, millinery, etc-
The capital stock is fixed at $950,000,
of which $lOO,OOO have already been
subscrilied. There is a similar institu
tion in En eland, which was incorpor
ated in 1877. and has proved so great a
success that, at the present time, it is
impossible to purchase any of the stock.
11. M. Stanley brought home-from
Africa the skulls of two animals called
•• sokos," wbicii had been eaten by an
affable chief with whom he hobnobbed
one day, and Prof. Huxley at onee
pronounced them to be human. Rut
Central America has now come forward
with tiie susmctu, and so far as sub
scriptions eo at present this animal
would arpear to come as near ourselves
as the aoko. for the other natives of its
forests whom we call men and women
eali the susmctu human.
A tax of five cents for every soldier at
the post having been imposed by the
council of idministration upon the post
traders at Fort Dodge, Kansas, the ques
tion of its legality was recently submit
ted to the attorney-general, who de
cides that it is in accordance witli law.
as the act of 1870 makes post traders
subject in all respects to army regula
tions. The tax is levied to aid in sup
porting "camp charities." He also de
cides that post traders confining their
business strictly within the limits of the
army are not subject to taxation by
State, Territorial or coun'.y authorities.
The absence of C.iincso women in the
East has compelled the males to inter
marry with the whites. There are in
New York city at the present time
nearly three hundred Chinamen who
have white wives. They are mainly
Spanish and Irish women, the Mon
golians preferring the latter on account
of their skill in domestic labor. This
intermarriage of races commenced about
six years ago. Consequently a young
China-Celtic generation is springing up,
the oldest member of whom is about five
years of age.
It is stated on no less an authority
than that of the lord chancellbr of Eng
land that the total sura of money ex
pended in the United Kingdom last year
for intoxicating drinks was very nearly
double the whole revenue of the coun
try, or $700,000,000. At this rate, says the
New York Cotuvicrcinl Advertiser, the
national debt of Great Britain— $4,000,-
000,000—could be paid in less tiian six
years with the money thrown away in
a sea of ale, wine and brandy. It is
rather a startling exhibit of the preva
lent human drought, and suggests a col
lation of similar data 'l this country,
with an eye to helping Dr. Crosby's
arguments by the logic of stern facts.
The Hudson river tunnel has been
1 xcavated a distance of more than fifty
feet. All that can be seen of the work
is a small frame building at the foot of
Fifteenth street, Jersey City,surrounded
by piles of earth and bricks. This shed
covers the shaft. The men are working
at a depth of sixty feet under the river.
There arc three shifts of ten men each,
each shift working eight hours. The
men are admitted io the tunnel through
air locks. Thirty-five feet of the iron
framework have been put in place, and
the work of putting in the brick lining,
which is to be three feet thick, was
commenced recently. In May the
shaft on the New York side wili be
sunk near the foot of Leroy street.
When Washington was on his way to
Red Bank just 100 years iyto he slept or.e
nizht at Chew's landing, a village
which is also in New Jersey. Next
morning he was surprised to find that
half the inhabitants had formed them
selves into a delegation to askofhim a
contribution toward a new Episcopal
church. He^ not only gave the contri
bution but signed the church l>ook, and
so did Carroll of Carrollton. The hook
lias been religiously preserved in the
vestry, and every governor of New Jer
sey lias for many years given something
to keep the building in order. Now,
however, it is to he torn down and a
commonplace brick church erected.
A young man named E mer Sever
ance, who was working at Smith &
< arter's eamp, at Princeton, Minn., bet
one of hit companions a quarter that he
could place a dipper of cold water on
the stove and hold his finger in the dip
per until the water began to boil. The
wager was accepted. Severance held
his finger in the dipper quite a while,
hut was obliged to withdraw it before the
water had reached a boiling point, hence
he lost his bet. On examination it was
found that the finger was completely
cooked; it pained Severance so that lie
was obliged to quit work and eomc to
town for medical treatment. The prob
ability was that the finger would have
to be amputated.
Some rrmarkablc statements were
made by a prominent physician before
the class of the college of physicians
and surgeons st Buffalo the other day.
He announced that one-fifth of all man
kind die of consumption alone, and one
third of all from the ravages of tuber
cles upon the bodily organs. Including
the lungs. Comparing this mortality
with that from vellow fever during the
epidemic of 1878, be said that it "would
rrouirr 450 years of such epidemics of
yellow fever to equal the devastation
wrought by consumption in a single
-rjy ra, i°n ' n th'" country alone, and
'5O yrars of such work to equal the mor
ality caused by tubercles in one genera
tion in this country." These state
ments are appalling, but they are made
by a man who has devoted the study of
a ife-time to the subject.
Dr.Willard Parker, an eminent physi
cian and surgeon of New York, regards
our system of caring /or the insane as
radically wrong. The institutions are
too large. Too much care and responsi
hinty are placed upon one man. It is a
physical impossibility for him to con-
Milt the peculiarities of each of several
hundred patient* whose canes differ
entirely from one another. Each case
mould >e distinctly studied. lie has,
besides, to superintend and manage the
institution and the grounds, to be
linner, treasurer, etc. "As well ex
pect the captain o' one of our iarge
steamers to act also ae stoker and or ok."
|he buildings are too magnificent,
ihey should be inexpensive, so that
when the wards become saturated with
disease they may be destroyed and
others erected. Home occupation should
he provided adapted to the patients'
o< nditions. Dr. Parker maintains that
insanity is not diminishing in this
country, as under proper treatment it
ought to be.
The discovery has recently been made
in the southeastern districts of Russia
th ' tigers, long unknown in those
parw have found their way there. Some
peasants of Golot-Übani, In the district
of Tiflis. recently noticed quite unusual
depredations among their flocks and
herds, which they ascribed to the rav
ages of wolv< s and bears. Finding a
fresh track of a large animal quite un
known to them in the snow only re
cently fallen near the village, twelve
of them pursued it into the mountains
armed witli hatchets. On their march
they were surprised by a terrible roar,
anu at the same moment a huge tiger,
measuring betwpen five and six feet in
length, hounded out of a cave in the
rock and struck down three men before
they knew what they were about. The
snow lying deep and soft, and therefore
giving way under them, fortunately
saved them. One other peasant rushed
up just in time ar.d clove the. animal's
skull in two. The tiger in his death
struggle, however, gave his slayer a few
ugly scratches.
Minnie Karell's fight witli a burglar
in her room deserves,to be immortalized.
She is a slight girl only eighteen years
of age, and tends het .athcr's bakery in
New York. Site was awakened at an
early hour in the morning by a man
standing over bcr fed, and was tohl by
the burglar that if she screamed he
would kill her. Nothing daunted Min
nie screamed and at once struck the
burglar in the face with all her might.
Qujte a tussle now ensued, the hurglar
trying to escape from Minnie's grasp,
and she trying to hold him until her
father and the workmen from below
could come to her assistance. Hut the
robber broke away from her and made
his exit from a window, not, however,
until Minnie had recognized him as John
Oates, a resident of the next block.
When the police came they found Min
nie's bureau ransacked and all her best
clothes gone; but fortunately they met
a man named Rogers in the street carry
ing a bundle of female wearing apparel
and arrested him. The clothing proved
to be Alinnie's. They next went in
search of Oates and found liini at a wake
next door to the bakery, coolly smoking
his pipe and condoling witli the be
reaved family. Minnie gets her heroism
from her mother, who is dead. She
used to tell Minnie always to fight when
she got in trouble; and the old lady
acted upon this principle, for she her
self used to lake a club to all who came
to the bakery and didn't conduit them
selves with propriety.
Mrs. Gov. I-ew Wnllace finds in New
Mexico what she calls a "subtle Spanish
essence" pervading everything. Even
the names of the commonest persons she
meets are poetic. She says in the Inde
pendent: "Perfectio (perfection), a
worthless peon in Navaho blanket,
sweeps the sidewalk; Benito (the good),
a shambling Mexican boy, watching his
chance for a spring at the spoons, brings
the daily mail; Mariposa (butterfly),
the siliest of Slowboys, pushes the baby
wagon; while Angellus,an angel whose
form has lost its original brightness,
lazily watches her. Three old witches,
whom we fnmiliarly cal! the Macheths,
were baptized Feliciana, the happy;
Rosita, little Rose; Hermosa, the beau
tiful." Mrs. Wallace adds that most of
the people she meets have Indian blood
in their veins, and not afew arc a mix
ture of Spanish, African and Indian.
Here is a picture of a Santa Fe woman:
"Quiet outofleach of the shady trees,
in the fiercest blaze of the sun, sitting
on a fragment of the Rocky mountains is
a statuesnue figure, which might repre
sent the oldest, the most furious of the
Furies. It is Blandina. the fair one, the
soft one, of Santa Fe. Her face, like one
of her own foothills, is worn ifltogutters
and seams. Not like them so molded
by the action of water, but by exposure
to sharp sunlight and withering wind,
destructive to beauty, which make even
young persons appear old. Her skin is
a parchment, which looks as though it
might date back to—l was about to say
the flood, but that would imply that at
some prehistoric era she had felt the
sanitary influence of a shower bath."
Curiosities of Yucatan.
A correspondent writes as follows
while in a vessel off Merida, Yucatan:
The sailboats that came off for Lard and
lager beer were an object of interest to
travelers. On one of them, tied by a
cord to the mast, was a queer little
domestic animal that looked at first like
an extraordinary cat. It proved to he a
little antcater, and when brought on
hoard the steamer liegan at once to
search every nook and cranny witli its
long, industrious nose for insects. We
were told that these animals are domes
ticated in Yucatan, being kept to cjear
dwellings of the multitudinous insects
that infest the country. The chief ob
ect that attracted attention, however,
was one of those great light brown
beetles that are worn as jewelry. It
was tethered to the left lapel of a Mexi
can's cont by a little chain fastened to a
gold hand. This is the kind of bug
that caused such a sensation when it
appeared as an ornament in a lady's
hair at a reception in London. When
the gold bands are set in diamonds the
hug makes a very showy ornament, and
lives about six months after being
chained, luxuriating on a diet of water
administered a drop at a time. It is
perfectly harmless. The natives find
them in the woods, and bring them to
port to"sell to strangers.
" Every visitor of Egypt," says the
Alexandria correspondept of the Ixindon
Times, " knows the Rouiak museum.
It is the best history that exists of the
Pharaohs, with their twenty five dynas
ties, and the Persians and Greeks who
followed them. Statues, pictures, orna
ments and writings are all there to tell
the story. But the tootle is small and
damp, and changes were projected last
summer which tequired the closing of
the museum for a time, and the packing
away of all the valuable in ca a until
the alterations were completed. They
were all completed. All the valuables
wcte deposited in a nrigboring ware
house under what seemed proper guar
dianship; but fob Iters, the other day
broke in through the roof, anJ they
mutt have been robbers or a certain
ra i k of intellect, for some eighty or one
hundred tcarabees of great value pecu
niarily. and impossible to replace, as
they related to the early dynast Irs, were
abstracted, although they wire things
ot no apparent worth to an Ignorant
person."
FOR THE FAIR HEX.
■ i
Kaalilon Hot**.
Very dark colors continue styiish.
The ulster is the leading spring wrap.
New dress buttons all come in two
I sizes.
| Spanish lace is the fancy of the mo
' ment.
j Diminutive patterns in brocaded ma-
I terials are among recent importations.
Mummy cloth, much improved, wifl
he among the fashionable spring goods.
pilt and silver balls, both plain and
facetted, form the heads of fancy pins for
the hair.
i Yellow, red and brilliant dark colors
are mingled witli the faint fade colors in
I new goods.
Small sunflowers, from one-third to
, half the natural size, are popular as cor
sage boquets.
Beaded passementeries will be largely
i used for trimming silks and satins used
in costumes and wrapß for spring.
Dragons, bees, butterflies and birds in
indefinite forms appear iimong the palm
leaves and other Eastern designs of
lately imported spring goods.
Violet is a fashionable color this
spring, and that in all its shades, from
I the color ofan iris to the soft hues of the
j Parmese violet and the Persian lilac.
The long overdress, which has rc
i oently been revived, is nothing bet a
gracefully draped princess polonaise,
i which requires only a flounce to cotu
, plete the costume.
j Fashionable false fronts of waved or
curled hair cover the whole crown
; of the head, coining low on the forehead
and fastened beneath the knot with a
small shell comb on each side. 1
Dresses are still made with scant skirts
bridled across the front and draped up
lichind. In the mnke of bodices there
is more variety, but the basque waist
prevails in the new spring costumes.
The latest novelty in the way of mak
ing up velvet is to nave the dress com
posed of a perfectly plain corsage, plain
coat sleeves and a plain ilemitrained
skirt without flounces, tablier or over
skirt.
A clever new idea in kid gloves is the
Foster glove, in which the fastening is
by a cord laced around hooks, like those
on a gentleman's laced shoe. The glove
may lie laeed in a twinkling, and the
fastening adapts itself to any sized
wrist, while all annoyance from burst
ing buttons or torn button-holes is ob
viated.
Krmlnlne Nupcratlt loin.
White Bpecks on the nails are indica
| live of good fortune.
When a woman enters a room she
should be obliged to sit down, if only
for a moment, as she otherwise takes
away the children's sleep with her.
To rock the cradle when empty is in
jurious to the child.
To eat while a bell is tolling for a
funeral causes toothache.
The crowing of a hen indicates ap
proaching disaster.
Drawing on a stocking inside out,
causes matters to go wrong during the
(lav.
By bending the bead to the hollow of
the arm the initial letter of one's f'Hure
spouse is represented.
When children play soldier on the
roadside it forhodes the approach ol war.
A child grows proud if suffered to
look into the mirror while less than
twelve months old.
Before moving into a new house first
send in bread and a new broom.
Whoever sneezes at an early hour
either hears some news or receives some
present the same day.— Cincmtiali En
quirer.
AeeomplUhrd UillrC Maldi,
ladies' maids in society must be.ac
complished to judge from an advertise
ment in n Roman paper. A young lady
is wanted for that island who must be
from twenty tottiirty years of age; dis
engaged, and of distinguished educa
tion ; very ssillful with the needle and
in making up fine things. She must be
of sympathetic turn, of elegant figure
and poses* linen and good clothes, good
enough for going out with and intend
ing her young mistress. She must send
her photograph to a signor in Rome,
who will personally inspect those young
ladies who present themselves to com
pete lor the situation. A young lady ol
these accomplishment*, beauty and good
clothes would not long keep a situation
as ladies'maid in America. She would
soon be asked by the impressible Ameri
can youth to resign her position as lady's
maid to become the mistress of his heapt
and home.
L'arlsa* Facts.
In Imndon.on the Surrcyside, most of
the " horse-cars " are drawn by mules,
and these mules sll come from Ken
tucky.
Among the ancients a beverage was
prepared for newly married people com
posed of honey and water; htneo the
saying—honeymoon.
It was Buffon WHO prqved that burn
ing-glasses were capable of consuming
substances. This fict was considered
fabulous previous to his day.
The thirty thousand oesf mutes in the
United States have for their accommo
dation fifty places of wvorship, where
services are conducted in the sign lan
guage.
In the Boston art museum is the body
of an Egyptian lodv of high rank, which
ies enclosed in a glass case. It is en
veloped in the cartonage or inner case,
elosely fitting the body, a false face cov
ering her fare, which was gilded origin
ally, some fragments of the gold leaf
still remaining.
Among the plants of Gninea Is the
csnnon-iMll tree. It grows to the height
of sixty feet, and hears a flower whTeh
looks like a cannon ball and is very fra
grant, whence its name.
The pagodas of China are religious
temples, and never used as domestic
dwellings. They are frequently orna
mented with bells at every corner of
their numerous roofs, sometimes to the
number of ISO, which sre kept perpet
ually .ringing by every sweep of the
wind. They are also decorated witli an
equal number of the gayest lanterns,
shedding a brilliant illumination in the
night time.
Between 17,000 and 90,000 alligator
skins are tanned yearly, which are con
sumed by boot and shoe manufacturers
in every portion of the United fltates, as
well as exported to and Ham
burg. The alligators formerly came
almost entirely fram Louisiana, ie 4
New Orleans was the great center of
the business. The Florida swamps and
morasses are now the harvest fields,
and Jacksonville, in that State, the
great depot.
THE UNHAPPY GRAB.
A Uraphlc P* and Ink ■ketch of Alex
ander of Hunk.
The feeling which comes uppermost in
the mind of any one who sees the czar
for the first time is one of sincere pity.
He is a large, ox-eyed man, evidently of
good intentions, but with a look of sad
ness and perplexity in him. His voice,
hnrsh as the grinding of a coffee-mill
out of order, for an affection of the
! throat, under which he lias long suffered,
renders speech painful to him- He
would have niadc a very amiable private
gentleman, and could have vol far more
ease and nmusement out of life if he had
handed all the botheration of govern
ment over to his brother Constantine,
i who has a taste for that sortof nonsense.
He himself could hardly have wanted to
reign. It was the Schouvaloffs. the
Lamberts, the Bariatinskys, the Adler
bergs, the Doigouroukys and some
others who desired he should be a firm
rulor of men. They were forever goad
ing and coaxing him by turns, as beef
is driven to market for those who wish
to roast it. They must often had a diffi
cult task, for his ponderous miyesty
(good easy man) is slothful and hcavy
witted by nature. He must have been
frequently unable to understand even
! what was wanted of him. He is suh
| ject to melancholy periods of hypoeon
, driasis, during which existence seems
but a dreary blank to liijn. He is
! haunted by fears of sudden death and by
the dread of assassination. At these
limes fie moons about on apparently
solitary walks with a large dog, hut
there is always a policeman handy to
keep the sacrilegious from approaching
him. When well he devotes much of
his time to tailoring, changing his cos
| lume with much stolid perseverance,
| and lie likes to he attended by a burap
! backed privy councilor, who acts as
foil to his fine figure and sets it off. for
he is a well-built man, tall and straight,
i though rather too German in the rotund
! itv of certain of his curves.
His father, Nicholas, who was in
many respects a notable sovereign, had
him very carefully brought up, and
foreseeing that he would want support,
perhaps devotion, in after life, to coun
teract his apathy, surrounded him with
some select young men who could be
relied upon. This little band of cronies
I have hung together ever since. They
have lived with and on the emperor
without interruption from the time of
his accession until now. He provides
for their wants : they dip their fingers
into his purse whenever they are so
I minded.
He is a looselv-hung emperor, more
| like the good fellow of a free and-easy
than the di-spotic master of millions,
when in the midst of these his familiars.
He has been known to sit in his shirt
sleeve*, astraddle on a ehair. hob-a-nob
, bhig with them.
The late Count Stmgonoff. who was
a prefix chevalier tinA a very high-pacing
j person generally, once broke in upon
the party thus emp.oyed. The em
i peror looked at him with those unut- ]
terahly mournful eyea of his and held
| out a champagne-glass to be refilled
from a bottle which stood by. The old
soldier drew himself up and answered 1
sternly- " I<et those who love you less
than I do perform that service." The '
czar showed no sign of displeasure, hut :
within a few months Ktrogonoff was
deprived of his offices, though he was
nearly connected with the imperial
family, his son having married the j
■ Brand Duchess Marie.
When his majesty is in humor he I
plays a good deal of cards with his own 1
chums, and it is rather a good thing for
these gentlemen, for when any of them
; is in want the cear will lose to him the
sum of which he stands In need, as a
j delicate way of giving it. and this
method ofliestowing substantial favor
:is perfectly well understood among
them.
The czar is a good shot, and has done
1 some grand things on boars. He some
times wars a pelisse which once cov
ered a fine bear he brought low with
his own hands, and it has been so ex
quisitely dressed that it is valued at
about (10,000, which is even more than
is ever paid elthcT for the sable or the
black fox. He can ride, too, though
not in the English fashion, and be
would be puzzled hy a sharp burst!
across tlio country. Iatcly his phy- i
sicians have recimmended him to walk, j
His personal deportment is excellent.
He stands and marches well. He shows 1
to advantage in uniform, though for
several years he has willingly clothed
hi i. self In mufti. His manners are those
oLgentleman, and there is something
extremely sympathetic about liirn. He
nroduoe* the impression that one would
like to know him lietter, if only be were
not an emperor. It Is this unfortunate
dreumstAnce which tAkeslhe amiability
•tit of him. sstshim upon his dignity,and
ivss a certain tannine** to his aspect.
Ilia father really could be dignified, but
he can't. There is a chuhbines* and
nerv usness in his proceedings upon
great occasions which reminds one of a
drum miyor or fugleman of
than an autocrat.
Formerly the emperor, as might have
been expected from one of his lethargic
temperaments, was averse to moving
about; latterly he has been troubled
by a perpetual restlessness He lives
very plainly, and his tabic is sparsely
served. A beefsteak for break fast, a
roast gclinotte and salid for his dinner
form the staple of his fare. His appetite
Is not robust and be sleep# badly.
The first fault of his reign was the
oommon blunder of heirs apparent when
they oome into power, lie had been
much courted by the discontented, and
he made far too much haste to undo nil
the work of hie father. He was emo
tional, pitiful, generous, all in a head
long, precipitate way. When be re
solved suddenly to abolish serfdom
several of his genera s and noblea threw
themselves bodily at Ills fret, and be
sought him to manage so greats chance
very gingerly. It was no use; be gave
everything he had to give, knocked
doWfl the great farmers genera) oi taxes
like so many nine-pins, upset monopo
lies for the discreet sale oft vodki.
closed the free port of the Black tea ac
cording to the latest principles of po
litical oeonomy, dashed off the shack
les from the press and laughed at new*
Rapers. These was a caricature pub
shed in St. Petersburg short's after
his accession which represented "him as
a droechky driver in the state that
dronehky drivers usually are after din
ner. His hat was pulled over his eyes,
and his horses were galloping wildly on
the road to " Reform." Behind him
wna the Grand Duke Constantine, Bay
ing: "Gently, brother. lam the tare."
Still the emperor laughed; he laughed
too when a piece was played in the
oourt theater exposing the corruption
of his officials, and a very fine pieoe it
wae. Then somebody shot at him,
and shattered bis nerves forever. He
fell into a sort of panio, trying hastily
to undo all he had done. Tie nad new
gyvea put on writers; he ordered some
awful cruelties in Poland. He tried to
win back bis sulky nobles. It was all
in vain, and now he is thoroughly
flustered and frightened right out of
his senses. His only chance of peace
and happiness would be abdication and
a year's yachting without newspapers.
At present he is worried into a fever
; every morning by a summary of all
the unpleasant things which have been
I printed about him for the last twenty
four hours throughout Europe. It is
; prepared by a special prtdte writer np
i pointed lor the purpose; his majesty
, takes care that it shad spare him no
pang of thisself-inflictcd torture, for he
will not trust a professional riiplo-
I inatist to do it lest he should gioss
j over the truth and endeavor to make
things pleasant for promotion'* sake.
A Baron Herder, a connection of Stie
! glitz, the banker, not long ago per
; fornnd this delicate service, and per
; haps does so still. The King ofYvetot
was a happy monarch; the Emperor of
Russia i* not. Surely, times must be
strangely altered.— I.ou'lon Truth.
Boh .fngersell on Mtlngy Men.
I despise a stingy man. I don't sec
I how it is possible for a man to die worth
*5,001,000 or J 10,000,000, in a city All,
of want, when he meets almost every
day the withered hand of be'gary and
the white lips of famine. How a man
can withstand all that and hold in the
i clutch of his hand (20,000,000 01 (30,-
000,000, is past my comprehension, I do
, not see how he can do it. I should not
think he could do it anymore 'ban he
eould keep a pile of lumber when hun
dreds and thousands wer* drowning in
the sea. Do you know I have known
men who would trust thei- wives with
their hearts and thei! home hut not
with their pocketbooks— not with a dol
lar. When I see a man of that kind, I
always think he knows which is most
valuable. Think of making your wife a
beggar! Think of her asking you every
day for a dollar or two dollars or to
' humbly beg f..r fifty cents. " What lid
you do with that dollar I gave you?"
Think of having a wife that is afraid of
you! What kind of children do you ex
pect to have with a beggar and * coward
for a motherP Oh, I tell \ou, if you
have but a dollar in the world and you
have got to spend it, spend it like a
king; spend it as though it were a dry
ieaf and you the owner of unbound* d
forests. That's the way to spend it. I
had rather he a beggar and spend my
last dollar like a king, than to he a king
and spend my money like a Iteggar. If
it's get to go, Jet it go. Get the best you ,
can for your family—and look as well as
you can yourself When you used to go
courting, bow nice you looked! Ah,
your eye was bright, your step was
| Tight, and you just put on the very best
you could. Do you know that it is in
sufferable egotism in you to suppose
that a woman is going to love you
always, looking as bad as you can.
Think of it! Any woman on earth will
be true to you forever when you do
your level best.
What I'Dzzled the Miller*.
The Minneapolis 7ViV'Htic. relates an
amusing incident that happened in the
I'niisade mill of that citv, January 1. j
The proprietors went to the expense of I
purchasing a new water wheel, with
which to propel the machinery of the
Palisade. Tlicy reluctantly shut the
mill down for a couple of weeks for the
purpose of nutting ttiis new wheel in.
feeling satisfied that the increased power
obtained from it would more than re
-1 pay them for the loss of time. Without
stooping to consider the matter of rights
and lefts, as applied to water wheels,
the work progressed until, on New
Year's morning, it was complete, and,
with a great sigh of relief, they prepared
for huHiness. and turned on the water.
Imagine their consternation when all
llie machinery - f the mill began to re
volvo—backward! Everything moved
, in just the opposite direction from what
it had ever done before, or was intended
to do. The stores turned ha kward,
| the elevators ran downward, instead of
upward, and—well, the proprietors
thought that New Year's might have a
bad effect on them, and turned the mill
or themselves wrong side up. The
partners, after careful examinations, as
sured each other that none of them
were standing on their heads! Then
they strolled out upon the platform and
took a look at the mill building. That
was right side up! Bui the machinery
persisted in running the wrong way.
from basement to attic, and threatened
to reverse the natural order of things
hy converting flour into wheat They
at first thought of going to the lunatic
asylum in a body; but, fnrtunatelv.
their millwright was suddenly struck
with an idea! They shut the gales, ho
took a squint at Ifor new wheel, and the
mystery was explained! It was a " left
hand" wheel, and had been thought
lessly set as a right.
An Absent Minded Men.
Perhaps not all of our readers who
were familiar with the late Hi las K.
Stow were aware of his extreme ab
sent-mindedness He once telegraphed
and wrote to the Bt. Nicholas hotel,
where be last slopped, to " hold his
night-shirt until called for." That night
upon retiring be was disgusted to find
that he had foiled to take it off before
dressing in the morning. Mr. Btow
was a lover of a good horse, and when
ever be beard of one within a certain
circuit around Troy he was uneasy until
he had pasted his judgment on tbe ani
mal. On one occasion be started to look
over a promising oolt that was owned
about ten miles in the country. Arriv
ing at his destination be looked aro ind
for a good hitching place. Observing
the weighted box at the end of the pic
turesque sweep with which tbe well
was rigged, he tied bis spirited animal
to it, and then turning around be de
liberately proceeded to lower the "old
oaken bucket" into the -rystel spring
below. He failed to discover the cause
of the tremendous power required to
touch bottom until lie saw his horse on
bis hind legs pawing the air. It was a
long time alter the occurrence that the
secret oi his broken harness and wagon
leaked out.—7 Vug Time*.
"I wish you would keep your mouth
shut!" exclaimed Ilollemoul, the dent
ist, suddenly being patience with his
patient's nmillection for falsing. "All
right," said the latter, suiting the sctiqjn
to the word. And then Hoilemout asked
him If he would be so kind as to open it
again long enough for him (Hoilemout)
to get his finger ou. You never do
know bow to please some men.
FA KM, HARDEN AND HOUSEHOLD.
Prnaini Orelurta.
rhis work U often done, apparently,
for no otli<*r purpose thae to do some
sort of perfunctory work in hacking "up
the treed. Tree* should be pruned and
thinned out, and so. with axe in hand,
the owner goes over them and butchers
them miserably. Tiie rough wounds
inflicted do not heal, but rot begins, and
in a short time the trees are useless, if
not dead. How rare id it to come
across n good-looking old orchard, ven
erable with age, but yet trim, neat and
sound in limb and trunk. Fruit trees
exist in Europe that are historical in
their age, and in this country there art
trees from which the old Indian tribes
gathered fruit before they were crowded
from the hanks of the beautiful Dela
ware. Rut now, an orchard thirty years
old is a ruin, and unless trees are planted
every few vears, a farmer must buy
his fruit. Much of this is due to the
rough pruning the trees undergo, and
more to the continual cropping of the
orchards. Perhaps something of it is
I owing to the root grafting which does
not seem to produce long-lived trtes.
top-grafted trees seeming to be more
vigorous than others. But bad pruning
i has much to answer for. One cannot
! prune by system. Each tree must be
studied separately and in regard to some
definite principles. For instance, prun
ing is intended to relieve the tree of use—
less or superabundant wood; to take
away less important branches that
crowd and press upon others; to reduce
the quantity of hearing wood, and so
preserve the vitality and balance of the
j tree; lastly, to remove disfigured,
i blighted and diseased wood. Now,
1 with these rules in mind. Jet one ex
amine carefully each tree before he cuts
aw&v a twig, and note where and what
lie should cut away, and then mind how
he cuts. No axe should be used about a
tree except to out it down when it cum
iiers the ground. A sharp, fine-toothed,
; long, narrow-bladed saw is the proper
pruning implement. A sharp knife with
a curving blade tliat makes a draw-cut,
and a pot of shellac varnish should go
with the saw. Everything that is re
moved should be cut close to the main
wood, trimmed smoothly with the knife,
and the wound covered with the var
nish. The varnish is shellac dissolved
in alcohol. This leaves a water and air
proof covering over the ground. The
work may be begun now and continued
as opportunity offers. There need then
be no hurry. Young trees should be
put in training now for future pruning.
Three or four main limbs only should
be left, so as to balance the head. All
in-growing shoots should lie removed
close to the main branch, so that no bud
is lefl to sprout. Each main side limb
may fork into two or three sub
br.inches, spreading fan-like around the
central limb, if there is one. The sub
branches should be encouraged to start
low. so that a low. round, compact,
spreading head may be produced. Much
may be done in forming the head by
tying down or hanging weights upon
limbs tliat are inclined to wander from
the way thev should go, so that when
they are old they will not depart from
it. "As the tree is bent the tree is in
clined," and a piece of hempAwist will
soon bring a crooked young tree into a
regular and handsome form.
lUrlpts.
SHACK CAKES,—Beat the yolks of four
eggs and then the whites to a troth. Then
ad<l a quart of flour and a quart of milk.
To be baked in small shape tins previ-.
ously greased.
OMEI.ET —A dish made according to
the recipe given below is called by the
Poultry Yard an omelet; Three pounds
of beef, chopped fine; three eggs, beaten
together; six crackers, rolled fine; one
table*poonftil of salt, one teaspnonful of
pepper, one tables poonful of melted
butter, sage to the taste, mix well and
make like a loaf of bread; put a little
water and bits of butter into the pan;
invert another pan over it: baste the
omelet occasionally; bake an hour and a
quarter, and wiien cold slice very thin.
PrnniKO. —One quart milk, four eggs
one cup bread crumbs, one-half cup
jam, one-half cup sugar. Butter a pud
ding-dish; sprinkle the bottom with
bread-crumbs; pour over these one hall
cup jam; cover this with the rest of the
crumbs. Heat the milk till near boil
ing. take it from the fire and add grndu
ally the beaten yolks, whites and sugar;
heat this until it begins to thicken: put
it spoonful by spoonful upon the layer
of crumbs. Bake until well set and
brown- Eat cold with cream.
BICKWHEAT CAKES.—The best buck
wheat cakes are made with an addition
of cornmeal float and oatmeal flour to
the buckwheat, in this proportion : Six
rupfuls of buckwheat, three cupfuls of
oatmeal flour, or if this cannot be ob
tained, substitute Crab am flour in its
place, and one cupful of cornmeal flour;
to this add a dessert spoon evenly Alien
with salt, two taolespoonfals of molas
ses. and lukewarm water sufficient to
form a batter; stir through the flour
well four teaspoonfula of baking powder
before wetting; but these cakes are
much better raised over night with
yeast.
ilaasahelS lilacs.
Tea leaves, used for keeping down the
dust when sweeping carpets, are apt to
stain light colors; salt is the best in tba
winter and new mown bay in the
summer.
Buttermilk is exoellent for cleaning
sponges. Steep the sponge in the no ;k
for some hours, then squeese it out and
wash it in cold water. Lemon juice Is
also gsod.
For the earache, toast an onion thor
oughly. take the heart out, put it into n
piece of flannel and insert it into the ear,
having previously put a few drops of
hot water into the ear.
For soft corns dip n piece of linen
cloth in turpentine and wrap it round
the toe on which the corn is situated,
night and morning. The relief will be
immediate, and, after a few days, the
corn will disappear.
The white of an egg, into which a
piece of alum about the sise of a walnut
has been stewed until it forms a jellv.
is a capital remedy for sprains. It
should be laid over the sprain upon n
fiiece of lint and be changed as often as
t becomes dry.
" There's something about your
danghtcr." Mr. Waughop said, reflec
tively, •• there s something about vour
daughter—" "JmS said old Mr. This
tlepod, •' there is. I had noticed it my
self. It cornea every evening about
eight oclock, and it doesn't getaway
usually Uil about two oVloot. And
ome of these nights I am going to lift it
nil the wny ftom tie front parlor to the
tide gate and see what there is in it "