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rjm1"' BOfrriary ana Treasurer: l'tuiip h coiuns.
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n. Williams. John J Spurgcon. Dlr.ctora.
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coiToniAii uoAr.D:
Cvnus H. K. Curtis. Cbnlrmurl
AV'D C. SMILCV , Editor
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riiil.drlpliij. Moinl... J.riury i. 1120
LET IT ALONE!
rpHE flurry of interest which left the
-- public on guard against wood-alcohol
poisoning . pacing. Wood alcohol is
not. As 1' ofp-.so;- TJradbur;. , of the
South Plnln Itkhia llijrh School, has been
pointing out, that deadly poison is easily
obtainable in limitless quantities. Ig
norance or cupidity may yet cause its
extensive circulation in the guise df
bootleg whisky.
Denatured alcohol is still on sale at all
drug stores. It is grain alcohol with a
10 per cent mixture of the wood distil
late which causes sudden death or sudden
and permanent blindness.
No one who is not utterly reckless will
drink bootleg whisky or tho mysterious
concoction:, that are till vended fur
tively in many .saloon. The bootleggers
F a bartenders do not always know
cf NvJdt they are selling.
lucre is onij one saic cour.se 101 uiose
who, being thirsty, haven't access to the
hard liquor manufactured before prohi
bition laws became operative:
Let it alone'
CONGRESS RESUMES
"TyiTHIN a few days wc shall know
how the winds arc blowing among
the senators who happen to be directly
concerned with the peace treaty and the
league-of-nations covenant. The talk
from both .sides which preceded the re
sumption of business today was frankly
experimental. Mr. Lodge, Mr. Hitch
cock and even the President hae been
taking soundings. What fiey hay is one
thing. What thej will do is something
else.
Congress has learned one tiling of im
portance during the reee.-'.-. It knows
that public opinion in this country will
'kr the level of a Dartv issue. Even though
f "We Teaders on both sides mav for a
time appear defiant and irreconcilable, it
is highly probable that the treaty, with
proper reservations, will b ratified
Within a few weeks.
THE TREATY SMASHERS SCORE
NE significant pjiragrapli in the
league-of-nations covenant 'will be
nullified. "The first meeting of the
assembly and the first meeting of the
Council shall be summoned by the Presi
dent of the United States of America,"
runs the text. As this is impossible,
owing to the treaty mess in this country,
the Supreme Council in Paris has dele
gated to Georges Clcmenceau the honor
of summoning the international body.
Here is a real iVtory for the bi'tter
endens. Without even the formality of
amending machinery a specific provision
of tho covenant is set aside at the outset.
Just as unceremoniously other regula
tions of the pact which concern America
will subsequently be changed. Cham
pions of "Americanizing" the treaty are
privileged to point out to themselves how
this is being done bv omitting the United
States -altogether.
JACKSON DAY
rpHE Jackson Day dinner, laid in state
-- on tho 8th of every January, was
originally intended to commemorate the
victory of New Orleans. It has become
a gacred rite of the Democratic party
which is observed with extraordinary
piety in presidential years.
Seers, gazcrs-into-the-future and feel
ers of the people's pulse in the party of
Jackson used to assemble for inspira-
..HOn. to cboOSe Iraflprs nnl n rr'nrr iUa
Ll.nation a demonstration of harmony.
I ' If we can believe half that we hear,
thc Jackson Day dinner this year is to
a packed. It is to be packed for Mr.
jalmer. Mr. Bryan may not even attend.
Tho first sign of a big rift in the party is
apparent in the difference of opinion
that seems plainly to exist between Mr.
Wilson and Mr. Bryan over the attor
ney general, who has so dramatically I
presented himseit as the strong Man for
whom America is believed to be wailing.
t The Democratic party, which aimed to
bo the party of world peace, is at war
with itself!
"Who will agitate for self-dctermina-
ftiott for political parties and make dc-
trtocracy safe for Democrats 7
MAETERLINCK AS A HUMORIST
T-vrif-yrnrt .irmNsrnw smrpiv cr,i,i nm'-
fcs rJ Jthlng about the delights of a foreign
.! la mi neitiir uodcik cm, unon tne cauiDmcnt
Which the traveler brouirlit into it. If
Maurice Maeterlinck is acquainted with
w TlAfc curious volume, which tho French
- VKL.impnlt m.udI tin lin mm. luffpni Tnlli. linirA
wdv' Mtua. .'v, ui. iii jr ivhiviuiij imi:
retailed that observation when flounder
ing in tho phonetic chaos which convulsed
exacting audience at Carnegie Hall
U tjic other night. The thoughts of the
1 rash enthusiast who endeavored to teach
01' ,tba JJclgian poet English in six weeks
,ri notrccomeu.
.""laeturo in English" should inspire the
,lllic with pertinent reflections, when it
5oMj laughing. There are highbrows
itto will Wuah for the ignorance of a
Mte Vork audience capable of Undine so
mwuwratnt ia tnc ntww struj-1
rIcs of a cultured foreigner with our
native tongue.
Yet what of the assurance of our
distinguished visitor? It may be urged
that ho was prodded to undertake his
darinp venture, for it is acknowledged
that M. Maeterlinck has long been averse
to self-advertisement and has exhibited
a marked distaste for the showy and
spectacular.
That, however, was his attitude in
Europe. The "celebrities," sonic bona
fide and some factitious, who have been
pouring into this country since the war
ended, seem in certain instances to liave'i
regarded us at once eagerly and cava
lierly.
We didn't expect to derive much sheer
fun from cither Maui ice Maeterlinck or
Vicente Blasco Ibanez whoso English
was nil and yet both these intensely
serious writers have moved us to laugh
ter. There is irony in this situation and
a further evidence of the Johnsonian
wisdom.
HOPES OF THE CITY HIGH
AS MAYOR MOORE STEPS IN
Hs Will Succeed If He Can Induce All
His Associates to Merit tho
Same Trust
T HAMPTON MOORE takes office to
" day with the expressed good wishes
of every one.
The men who exerted themselves to
prevent his nomination and, when that
failed, did their best to secure tho election
of a. Council which would bo hostile to
him, arc saying that thev wisli him well.
They could not say anything else. How
sincere thev ar" will be dctci mined when
they begin to act.
There is an imnression abroad that
they will lie in wait for him and that if
they can catch him off his guard they
will drive a knife under his fifth rib
and give it a vicious twist.
Mr. Moore, however, knows all their
tricks. He has not once been caught
napping since he entered the campaign
for the nomination, for he has outplayed
the opposition at every move.
He enters office supported by a major
ity of the new Council organized by his
friends and held to its duty by the con
sciousness that the whole city is watch
ing its members and by the knowledge
that Mr. Moore is also watching them,
with his weather eye on the heavens and
on South Philadelphia, looking for tho
first sign of the swooping down of any
predatory hawk upon his little brood.
Other Mayors have entered office with
the same protestations of a desire to
serve the people that Mr. Moore is mak
ing. But, with few exceptions, his prede
cessors have been speaking in a Pick
wickian sense. Their pronouncements
have resembled the outgivings of Presi
dent Castro of Venezuela, who uttered
grand and lofty sentiments with his
mouth while with his hands he was rob
bing every one within his reach.
The public is paying Mr. Moore the
high compliment of accepting at their
face value his protestations of a deter
mination to sei-ve the city to the best of
his ability. There is widespread faith
in the honesty of his purposes. His past
record fortunately justifies that confi
dence. Ho has gone to and fro among
thp politicians of this city and among
the statesmen in Washington and during
all the years has kept his hands clean
and his reputation free from the breath
of suspicion.
Hp has not been unaware of what has
been going on in Philadelphia. And
when the time was ripe and the people
were ready he entered the campaign as
their leader to overturn the political ma
chine held together by a common hunger
for easy money filched from the pockets
of the taxpayers.
I He fought "that machine and won a
victory which has made him a national
I figure.
i Now he is to be put to the test, not
the test of tho honesty of his purposes.
but of lu's ability to change the habits of
the officeholders and to force men who
1 have bepii accustomed fo the old system
I to adopt a new one.f based on different
' standards of public service.
The men whom he has appointed to
, take charge of the different city depart-
i ments are in sympathy with his pur-
! noses. Otherwise thev would not have
been selected. But hundreds of men
trained in tho old methods will remain at
their desks. Some of his supporters are
with him because they were dissatisfied
with their treatmoht by the old machine
rather than because they did not like its
methods. Selfishness is back of their
1 action, and they will remain selfish to
; the end. Their backing will handicap the
j Mayor because they are likely to turn
on him as they turned on others when
they could not get what they wanted for
themselves.
Mr. Moore must be trusted to deal
with these men when the occasion arises.
His knowledge of political history will
show him the way. He knows the value
of publicity, for he has already used it
in dealing with the organization of the
Council. It is just as efficacious in deal
ing with big men, as Roosevelt demon
strated when he was governor of New
York. When that distinguished man was
threatened by Tom Piatt, the state boss,
he told Piatt that if he made the reprisals
which he threatened, he, Roosevelt, would
tell the public of the threat and chal
lenge the boss to do his worst. Piatt
caved at once, for he dared not bring
upon his own head the flood of indigna
tion which he knew would follow.
Mr. Moore will make mistakes, for he
is only a human being. Some of the
blunders will be through errors of judg
ment, others will come from accepting
the wrong advice; but so long as he can
hold the present popular confidence in
his honest desire to do the right thing,!
all these mtsWKes can De pardoned after
they have been condemned.
The art of government, as Jpfferson
once said, consists in the art of being
honest. Of course, he used honesty in
its broad sense with all its implications.
The French Revolution arose because
there was dishonesty in government. The
czar was overthrown in Russia more
recently for the same reason. And tho
Bolshevist regime, now tottering, will
tumble to its fall because its leaders have
net honestly sought the general good,
but the good of a group. And right here
at home there has been a political ovcr-
, hprause the old regime in Philadel
phia was Bolshevistic at bottom, and
acted tke thwry that government js
v
EVENING- PUBLIC LEDOER
created for the "profit of the governors.
Of Mr. Moore's honesty there is rlo
question. Neither Is there any doubt of
his desire to give to the city an honest
administration. Whatever doubt there
may exist as to the success Of his efforts
lies in the uncertainty about his ability
to force hi3 associates to be as honest
as he.
He is on trial.
His task is so great that it will test
his abilities to the utmost.
If he succeeds Iie will deserve the
gratitude ot a long-sulrenng community
released at last from tho disgrace under
which it has labored for many years.
THIRTEEN BILLIONS?
TT MAY be fairly said that the cffoit of
- British statesmen and financiers to ar
lange for large additional credits in the
United States is part of the plan ' de
vised in London to restore tho economic
functions of Europe and stabilize the
social order of the allied nations. For
that reason, and no matter what the ulti
mate decision of the American people
may be, the plan should bo considered in
all calmness, honestly examined, and ac
cepted or rejected upon its merits.
Appeals to national prejudice, to race
hatreds, to bigotry and inherited dislike
are an ignorant and detestable proceed
ing which befog a central issue of the
utmost importance. Secretary Lansing
was justified in expressing disgust and
indignation at the false reports circu
lated by those who insisted that Lord
Grey had completed secret arrangements
for a ?13,000,000,000 loap with American
hankers and the American Government.
There will be serious questionings in
this country about the wisdom of helping
Britain to the financial godfathcrhood of
continental Europe at a time like this.
Concern thus expressed will be balanced
more or less equally by the American de
sire to maintain tho peace which wc
helped at great cost to establish. Grudges
and hatreds can have no decent place in
the discussion.
Sir George Paish, the distinguished
British financier who has just arrived in
this country, is commissioned to arrange
for new and vast loans. Clear expres
sions of the British needs and purposes
ought to be made at, once. Until the
people are thoroughly informed general
support for this newest reconstruction
scheme cannot bo expected from them or
their Congress.
It happens, unfortunately, that Sir
George Paish arrived in New York simul
taneously with Admiral Jellicoc, who is
on a tour of the British possessions to
enlist support for the British naval pro
gram, which would require an almost
immediate expenditure of $800,000,000.
That is about $:j00,000,000 more than
was required a few years ago for all the
purposes of tho British Government.
It is certain that the plan for the
financial rehabilitation of Europe with
American money under British guidance
will not receive enthusiastic support
from the American people until the dif
ference between the Paish and the Jel
licoc missions is explained away.
James M, T!pk lic
Hopp for the Slase nitc the trend of the
modern stage, and by
Tar of illustration eoutraMs the plays Ii
saw in Philadelphia in ISSIi and the plny.s
in Philadelphia last week. Perhaps lie is n
little unjust. In 3SS" lie saw the revival .if
many nit and good plays. Some Rood old
plaj.s hate been produced here during the
present season. There terc many putiK
plays produced in 1SS.". he did not so to see
or which he has forROtten. There have been
many plays this season that we are q-iitc
villinff to forget. On the other hand, this
season has been particularly rich in new
plajs at once clever and wholesome. And
no lover of the stage is going to despair
while so wonderful a play as "Dear Brutus"
is being produced and is drawing crowds.
With business grow
ing and the railroads
of the country suffer
No Reason for
Discouragement
ing from inadequate
equipment, the matter of transportation be
comes daily n more sorious problem. How
anl riliiitt, president of the Northern Pa
cific Railroad, sajs it will be necessarv to
spend S::,nO0,OOO.O0O during the next ' few
enrs for cars, engines and shop facilities if
fongestion is to be avoided. More water
wajs nuil improved turnpikes will nKo help,
and the airplane builders, barge builders and
motor companies will doubtless do their bit.
Seamus O'Doherty. n
Mysteries and Secrets I ea d rr m the Irish
republican movement,
has arrived in this country and declares that
lie didn't cross the Atlantic in ship, boat or
floating essel of any description. How he
came across is a secret, lie says, AVhlcli
proves that Mr. O'Doherty has failed to
learn the first lesson of secret-keeping, which
is never to admit that you have any secret
to keep.
"Any proposal for
compulsory labor,"
says Mr. Oompers,
Hrratl and Butler
Argument
"is repugnant to
American' sovereignty nnd citizenship." Yea
and nay to that. 'Twos ever thus. We loaf
when we have a mind to and occasionally
keep on loafing until stern necessity drives
us back to work. '
Tho II. C. I. General Store is trying to
cop the billion dollars that formerly went
every year to the corner saloon end is mak
ing n pretty good stagger at it.
Though the political student may not
believe it. there are ever so many Democrats
and Republicans who have not yet been men
tioned for the presidency.
It may be that Mr. Bryan thinks he de
serves to be remembered by his party because
lie has helped to make the world dry for
democracy.
The Young Lady Next Door But One
says fihe supposes there isn't much ehnnce
of prices going into a decline while there Is
so much consumption.
Herbert Hoover's chances for a presi
dential nomination seem to be growing
stronger, for here and there wc b'Em to hear
a little knoclw ;
Now is n good time to begin a course
In accounting so as to Ke in shape to wrestle
with your income-tax blank.
Itnr.ih apparently doesn't caic whose
machinery his monkey wrench smashes.
Things arc so tight that uot even prices
can take a drop.
Just in u very -little while we'll be look,
ins for tho first robin.
Among social climbers don't forget the
II. C, 01 1. "v ,., ....., -'"
PHILADELPHIA, MONDAY, JANUARY 5,
POLITICS ANDJDINNERS
Attendance at Social Functions Im
portant Part of tho DuJIes of Ex
ecutives, as Sproul and Moore
Are Finding Out
By GEOIIGH NOX McCAIN
pOVltftNOK W. C. SPItOUIi was one of
- the few out-nf'town guests nt the In-,
foimal dinner given by Charles M. Schwab
nt his residence in New York to Admiral
Jellicoe, of l'nglnud, late first lord ot the
admiralty. i
Some cynically observant Kngllsliman once
said the principal function of British royalty
l was to lay corner-stones and open hospitals.
This may .be true ot our ally, but in this
republic of states it is n fct that a great
pat t of the official duty of governors and
majors of gicat cities is of a purely social
character.
In such matters they never lose their
identity as representatives of state or city.
t!opruor Sproul, iu tho brief period in
which he hns filled the office, has been called
upon more frequently than any of his pre
decessors, I think, to grace social functions.
And it will poutluuc fo the end of his term.
Personality has n great deal to do with it.
Mayor-elect Moore has had, even before
assuming the duties of his office, an experi
ence suggests c of what awaits him in this
direction.
As it congressman, dinners mid receptions
were frequent nfl'aiis. As Mayor they will
become epidemic. If he accepted every in
vitation to dinners, public and private,
luncheons' and kindred social affairs that he,
is ccatain to receive ho would have no time
for municipal duties.
Worse still : he would likely be dead inside
of six months.
I A CIIANtiK of officeholders iu rural coiin-
ties is. as a nile. lately accompanied by
the wholesale upheavals In department staffs
that characterize such changes in large eitics.
Montgomery county is a sample. While
there was only one break iu Kcpublican
party lines, that of county commissioner,
the newly elected officials have made few
changes in tho old office personnel.
Horace Smcdley, of Lower Merlon, new
county controller, continues his present
deputies. The county commissioners will rc
tnin the old staff of officials, while Register
of Wills Robert V. Miller and Recorder of
Wills Paul 1). Scheedcr will also retain their
present forces.
Hymns of (huiikssiving would rise by the
thousands were such nu easy-going system
to preail when a change of administration
takes place iu this city.
AS MAYOR-IX'nOT MOORE assumes the
"" duties of his office iu the big building iu
1 Vnu square, he will enjoy the unique dis
tinction of hiding a private secretary who
is not n political appointee, a casual friend
or a mere acquaintance. i
Durrell Sinister knows nil the moods and
tenses, personal peculiarities, likes nnd dis
likes for Ihe Major of a great city is only
human (he incomings nnd outgoings, the
temperamental characteristics, and even the
soui), fish and salads peculiar to the
appetite of the new chief magistrate.
For a matter of fourteen years now .7.
Hampton Moore and Durrell Sinister have
jogged nloii" in the relative capacity of
public official and prhatc secretary.
The n-siicjatinii began back in the dajs
of the old City Trust, when Shuster was it
clerk uti, I Monro was li t t. the president and
subsequent receiver of the companj.
When Congressman Moore was elected
president of the Atlantic Deeper Wnterwajs
Association, Simpler was named assistant
secretary. As a result, next to the Mayor
e'ect, he is perhaps Hie best posted man on
this work between Cape Cod and the Florida
licjs.
His great opportunity now arises of bo
coming the best -posted man iu Philadelphia
on Philadelphia affairs.
Rc
OBERT A. STR1NE. claims Ridley Park
ns his home, but he spends nine months
of the j ear away from his fireside.
Theatrical managers, opera folk and the
amusement world generally will remember
"15(d)" Strine as connected with the finan
cial end ot such enterprises fifteen years or
more ago. He is u brother of thp late
Charles W. Strine, well-known Philadcl
pliian, who was manager of the Boston
Opera Co., nod subsequently manager of
Melba, the songstress.
Bob Strine is ns big, impressive and con
fident now iis licwas in the hectic period of
the past.
For j ears he has been what he terms an
"IMucator." lie spends bis t imp! in the
cotton districts of the South among planta
tion owners he calls them farmers edu
cating them on the future possibilities of
that industrj.
lie is the field reprcsentotitc ot the No
tional Cotton Association and rubs elbows
with bankers, spinners and "ginucrs" as
well as planters.
The big idea behind it is to promote a
better understanding between the individual
factors wno have to do with cotton from the
moment the seed is dropped in the soil until
it emerges from the loom as a finished
product.
The small planter today throughout the
South, with cotton skyrocketing in the mar
kets of the world, isn't a bit better off than
he was ten jears ago, Mr. Strine says. Ilis
condition is deplorable. Mr. Striuc's work
is to organize all factors in the industry for
the promotion of a more equitable distribu
tion of profits, and primarily to stimulate
a greater output.
The world's consumption of cotton is
steadily increasing 'nnd greater production is
imperative. Best of all, the cotton men of
the South, he says, aro awakening to their
opportunities nnd eagerly grasping the ideas
that he presents.
JOSEPH rRALINGER, whose uam is
familiar to most people who visit Atlantic
City, is not, oddly enough, a resident of that
famous icsort. He is a near-Philadclpliian,
JIc has a beautiful home on the side of
Spring mountain within sight of the late
Governor rennypacker s estate 111 upper
Montgomery county. He has lived there for
nearly a score of jears.
lie rarely visits Atlantic' City and only
on business. lie lives a quiet life and only
occasionally motors down to Philadelphia.
Of late years he lias spent his winters in
Miami, Fla.
Philndclphians who recall Atlantic City
thirty-fnc jears ago will recall "Joe" Fru
linger as the Boardwalk magnate, sin part
nership with Captain John Young, of car
rousels and other nmuemeuts. He was re
garded as one of the shrewdest .Terseymen
in business along the Boardwalk. But he
was a IMiiladelphiau, the foundation of whose
fortune was laid iu Atlantic City, where he
begau life as the proprietor of 11 stand on
the Boardwalk near Tennessee avenue.
This reminiscence comes to the surface In
(otiucetlou witli the announcement of the
death of his son-in-law, Dr. Underwood
Cochrane, of Atlantic City, member of the
city commission and the owner of Wyndgate,
one of the ihow-plucc residences of tho coast,
nt Somcrs Point.
When the Brynn'Lcaguc holds its rally
Id New York Eddlo Foy should be engaged
to sinK "Wc thought lie was a goner but
the pat came back, for be couldn't stay
swaj.
"NO, UNCLE SAM
THE CHAFFING DISH
Why Gild the Lily?
Nancy Wynne, with tho comment that one
never knows when it bouquet of sweet peas
may bo useful, calls our attention to the
following:
The Church ot was tho scene ot
a mairiaira of much social Interest.
Two of tho bridesmaids wore frocks of
yellow baronet satin, two woro brown tullo
liAls and they also carried bouquets of
sweet peas. The Evening Bulletin.
DID CHRYSOSTOM OF SPORTS DEPT.
PLUNDER QUIP OF N. Y. CONFRERE?
Alleged Lack of Credentials
for Sparkling Epigram
On Friday the Dish published an epigram
fallen from the lips of Bob Maxwell. This
glittering tnof asserted that they are making
the loving cup with eight handles nowadays
for the convenience ot the pallbearers.
Now Bob Sensendcrfcr comes to hand with
the information that this bit o intellectual'
tinsel should be credited to Bugs Biter, of
the New York American, who used it in his
department last Wednesday.
"Shakespeare is good enough without
giving him credit for n lot of stuff that ap
pears in the Bible, nnd the same thing goes
for Bob." That is Bob Scnscudcrfcr's com
ment. Accordingly wc lay a wreath of maiden
hair fern against the quoted epigram and
remark that it is our own fault for gcttiug
Tiuv's stuff nt second hand, through the
Soothsayer, instead of listening nrouud to
pick it up for oursclf.
Bob remarked to n friend of ours during
a long voyage in the office elevator that wood
alcohol is the best wecK-cnu uririK.
"Why soV" asked our informant.
"You drink it ou Tuesday nnd the week
cuds immediately," said Bob.
Expect Sun to Rise on "000 Reds Behind
Bars, headlines the Recotd.
That could only happen, we suppose, at
the Eastern Penitentiary, where presumably
all the patrons have cells on the bunny side.
Our friend Mr. J. St. George Joyce agrees
with us that the Irish are really running
Japan, ns not only is the premier called
Ilara, but the correct name of the emperor
is the McAdoo,
The Urchin's Suitcase
A fair estimate of the things most highly
prized by a three-year-old urchin was
gained by us when we examined his small
suitcase, which lie had carefully packed with
his choicest possessions and put away in n
corner. J.11C urciun peruaps uccuusc nc uus
done a good deal of traveling in the last
yClir seems to have a fixed idea that he
may be called upon at any time to depart
suddenly for Fierceforest, and lie wnnts to
be sure that bis particular prizes arc all
ready for flight. He has a very small minia
ture Biiiteasc, and we found it tucked awuy
in 11 corner where he had put it with great
care. These were the contents:
The lack of an old calendar.
A small book called "Fluffitail's Adven
ture," u'i't some marginal notes the Ur
chin had made himself, but ichich tee are
unable to interpret.
Three ,mall cardboard houses, vrry dear
to the Urchin because the roofs are sprin
kled icith olittcrinn imitation snow. One
of these houses (they arc each about ttco
inches high) has a minute and very dry
scrap of preen vegetation glued by the
front doorto represent a tree.
A small lead cow.
A doll's tin pic-disji.
Half a do:cn unintelligible cards, taken
from a ten-cent store nos'iuito netting
slocking.
Tiro Christinas cards.
A number of cards bearing the pictures
of headless animals. The gamo teas to
attach the correct heads Jo the various
animals. All Hie heads tcero missing,
' Armed with these goods and carrrtoc bis
i92(
1920
AIN'T OVERTHROWN, BUT HE ACTED
DARNED UPSET!"
small suitcase tho Urchin feels ready to face
tho world and go anywhere at nuy time.
Wc cannot imagine anything more mel
ancholy than uutrinimiug the Christmas tree
unless it is being a retiring councilman,
back to the Old Lifo and not even a ma
hogany roll-top to take ulong as a souvenir.
Wc are beginning to catch up with our
Christmas shopping. WB have just been jn
to wish our good friend Jerry Cullcu 11
Merry Christmas, nnd hope soon to get
round to propose a Prosperous New Year to
the genial chap who hocks our Liberty Bonds
for us.
If tho census authorities really, wanted .1
man nccustomed to asking questions with
amiable persistence, why didn't they borrow
the Quizcdilor?
Along the Wissahlckon
THE boughs are bare, the shrines arc still,
And lanes that once were guy
With moonlit maidens, tinkling tunes,
Arc waiting dreams today.
And where, arc Margot, Natl and Peg,
Who went the greenwood way?
With song-birds of tlio summer time,
Have they, too, ilown away?
Forgotten shrines, where happy dreams
The earliest minstrels sturt;
AVliere Mnytimc brings the inissiug swain
To play flic Hector's part,
Or lovers wander, whispering low
Tho lovers litany
Now crumbled leaf am log nnd lane
Await a May to be.
Sad echoes of some blither tune
From every blackened bough
A thrush trills "Auld Lang Sync" along
Tho Wissahiekon now.
' JOSEPH A. FLNLEr.
Social Chat
Harry AVlttmann, tho well-known pulchrl-tude-plckcr,
lunched at Veranda's with tho
Quizedllor to discuss futuro plans for tho
back-pjgo Beauty Corner
...
Paul Kitchen, when Been by us on Chestnut
street, promised not to say nnythlnsr about
Insuranco tho next timo bo calls at tho olllcc
of the Dish.
...
Harrison Hires must bo busy maltlnc root
beer these daj's, as ho liaBn't sent us any
poems.
...
Tom Smith, tho agreeable ex-Mayor, Is
Coins to feel a llttlo cramped In Glenslde,
Ho, bum, every day seems lilto Sunday.
...
Guy Wheeler, during a discussion of mat
ters and propositions, admitted to us that If
we would invito him to dinner bo knew how
the mejiu could bo added to,
...
Todd Daniel ' entertained n number of
week-end guests nt the Federal Bulldlne. Jtr.
Daniel saB that nothing' could bo nicer than
their deportment, and added that they would
havo to take nicltliig-pot luck.
...
Itampy Sloorc, leader of tho younger set
at the City Hall, only lias to do ills column
on this pago twico a week. Ilampy ha3 n
cinch, la our prlvato denunciation.
As to Flappers
Ilyman Jones keeps ou writing to us to
nsk "What is the precise meaning of the
word flappert"
Wc thought nt first that llyinan wns
merely spoofing us, but ho bus spent six
cents in stumps, so he must really wuut to
know.
A flapper well, wc arc a great ndmlrcr
of flappers how bhull wc put it? Is 11
member of the ruling sex not quite old
enough to choose the most expensive dish
011 tho menu whcil she is tukcu out foi
lunch.
Or, as old Dove Dulcet put it iu ouo of.
hh justly unpublished poems, a Dapper Is
the ucvV moon rjhlulug n the glow of the
sunset, tiOUKATKS.
P ' .
PAPER PROFITS
ON PAPER hccouljj figure out
A profit raising chickens,
Ream after ream the good old scout
Went ciphcriug like the dickens.
But oh ! tho schemes of men and mice.
The slip 'twixt lip and cup.
The doggone paper rose iu price,
And ate his profits up !
C. Ti. Edson in the Kansas City Stnr.
Doubtless Lodge, Borah ct nl. feci a
boyish pride in having deprived tho Presi
dent ot the honor of issuing the. call for tho
first meeting of the league of nations.
Senator Borah's questionnaire isn't
nearly so interesting as that o tho census
man.
Barcelona lacks meat and fish, but It
presumably has its share of nuts.
The eighteenth amendment took the joj
out of tho nineteenth hole.
Daniels is of the opinion that DcAcr
thinks himself a double decker.
Four, four, four years Moore!
What Do You Know?
QUIZ
1. According to the text of the Icaguc-ol-
nations covenant, who was to call the
first meeting of tho assembly and the
council of the league?
2. What is tho Jack-o-Lantcrn?
Ii. AVhat is the meaning of the word miladon
4. What is a mews?
5. What arc tho three divisions of Dante's
"Diviuo Comedy"?
0. What is the meaning of the Latin phrasi
"Iu loco parentis?
7. Who was Lob in English folklore?
S. Wlinf Tintimi hns iust slimed nn arm'-
"" stico with tho Russian Bolshevist
government?
9. Whcro is Appomattox, whero Lcc siu
rendered to Grant?
30. In what century did King Solomon linl
Answers to Saturday's Quiz
1. Leonard Wood was born in New Hamp'
shire.
2. An eisteddfod is a congress of WcW
bards.
."5. Tho Furies, Tisiphone, Alccto and M
garrn, were snake-haired goddesses el
Greek mythology scut from Tartarus
to punish crime.
4. Pisciculture is the artificial rcarlos '
fish.
C. The word dais may be pronounced in tw
syllables with a long "a" and a sbori
"i," or 11B though it were slmpU
spelled "das," with a long "a.'
G. Great Britain fought two mala iyrJ
with tho Boers-ono in 1881, wH
resulted in the recoguitiou of the in
dependence of the Transvaal repuW"'
and the one which opened in 1S90 an
resulted In the nnnexntion ot I"
South African republic niu. tbe Oraw
Free Stuto by Grrut Britain.
7. Fox-lire, a corruption of "fause" '
"faux," fire, meaning falso fire
tbe phosphoric light without heat t&"
plays about deciiylug matter.
5. Tho Empirics composed n school of mM''
cine founded by Seraplon of AI
drin, who contended that it was bo
necessary 10 uuuuu ""-" Tjtl
the functions nud nature of the dowi
but that cxprrleuco was the best guw'j
Hence empirics became, nynonypwui
with quacks. j
0, A "dies uon" Is n day on which no W"
business is done. .'
10. Alexander Ilaui'lltou was born In
t.litn.l nflNcvlU- Wt InditJ. '9
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