Evening public ledger. (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, December 13, 1919, Postscript Closing Stock Prices, Page 8, Image 8

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PUBLIC LEDGER CQMPANY
crnva it. k. curvna. pioini .
) Chrlf II I-udlnmon. VIca rrclflnti John P.
Martin. Swrtarv nrt Trmjurfrl Philip A Collln,
John II Wllllarrn, John J. Spurgcon. Director;.
EDITOniAI. BOARD!
Cudr II K. CcjTii, Chairman
jifoAVID C. BMILEr Editor
JOHN C. MARTIN . . general Business Manager
rubllahfa dally at 1'im.io I.roorn Building.
' , Independence Siuaro. I'hUartelphla
ATLANTfa CITT,...,.. . Preat-lnion Dutldlnff
ffw l'on..,. ...... 200 Metropolitan Tower
.DrrnotT T01 Ford Building
8r. Loms.... .........1008 FulWton Jiulldlnic
Ciucioo. 1 1302 Tribune Building
NEWS BUREAUS!
N. E. Cor.l Pennsylvania Ave. and 14th St.
'New Tonic Bontuu The) Stm llulldln
XiOxdon Bc&CAU.T... ..,.. London Times
SUBSCRIPTION TEnMS
The Evknino PoaLio liEwicn la Berved to eub
"acrlbera tn Philadelphia and surrounding towns
ft the rate of twelve (12) centa per week, payable
o the carrier. , m ,., .... ...
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fry Address all communications o TV" np P6Ho
Ledger, Independence Square. 1'hilaAclpMa.
Member of the Associated Press
THE ASSOCIATED ritEBS is cxclu-
itlvelv entitled to the use for republication
of all neics dispatches a edited to it or not
otheruHsc credited In this paper, and also
the local nctos published therein
All rights of republication of special dls
hatches herein arc also reserved.
FhUiJelphli. Stnrdir. Bwmber . IW
INTO THE DISCARD
DOCTOR GARFIELD'S job never was
enviable. Ho will go down in his
tory as the man who invented heatless
.Mondays and gasohneless Sundays and
tfark and dismal evenings every night in
the week. Ho will hold the novel distinc
tion of having a high appointment to
.protect the public from lack of fuel and
' "Julfilling his mission by depriving it of
that very commodity on a spectacular
Bcale never before dreamed of.
Most people, remembering only such
discomforts, will agree that he and his
whole fuel administration were failures
from beginning to end. So his passing
"into tho White House discard is not
likely to bring him any very profound or
'abiding sympathy.
,, But it is irony that he should earn
tfiis exit by protesting against the usual
and familiar passing of the buck to the
dear old public.
Yet, as he passes from the stage, he
may find consolation in the fact that he
joins a distinguished company :i the
"This Way Out Club," of which Messrs.
Garrison, H.-fvey, iryan and House aie
leading members.
RAINBOWS
GOVERNOR SPROUL, on his return
from Washington, -.-emarked that he
"vyas'-not ehasing ra'-tenvs.
Wice man ! TheVe is no less profitable
sport than that of pursuing an iridescent
phantom that consists of nothing but
mist and sunlight.
Phantoms sometimes chase men, and
fcatch them, too, if they do not watch out.
The Governor has a very large job on
his Rands already, and if he does it well
"t-'as a vast majority of Pennsylvanians
Ifiope he will it will be time enough to
figure on the next step upward in states-
"manshiij. In fact, it may be tho next
$v nrjjtep itself.
ESS PLATITUDES, MORE PORT
lX GOOD many Philadelphians have
!p-favored a forty-foot channel and port
expansion in just about the same spirit
as they have admitted tho obvious ad
vantages of virtue, liberty and independ
ence. Attractive programs always have
a host of friends. It is the real workers
that are so often lacking.
Fortunately George F. Spioule, named
Dy Mayor-elect Moore as the new director
of the Department of Wharves, Docks
and Ferries, deals more largely in the
,j;(K!lities "than in the platitudes of his
specialty. He has an excellent record as
secretary of the board qf port wardens
and secretary of the commissioners of
navigation. He is versed in the needs
of the harbor and efficient ways of filling
them.
His appointment is a hopeful sign that
the commercial facilities of Philadelphia
may catch up at last to the constantly
increasing and broadening commercial
(opportunities.
f MYSTERY
jfT EGElD, rumor and experience
--J taught me that Philadelphia is de
Voted to the thing called scrapple," said
(tha Well-Dressed Stranger, with a look
pp and down Broad street, "but until
jow I did not know that you use it to
i repair the street paving."
h IS IT THE SAME OLD STORY?
EN in Washington are now begin
ning to say that the soft coal strike
Jwa3 brought about by something resem
bling collusion between the miners and
jho operators so that the miners might
jet higher pay and the operators might
get higher prices.
! If it shall appear that the public has
,teen fooled, there must be a reckoning,
,Which will demand the creation of a per
manent tribunal for the settlement of
jjabor disputes before which the Interests
at the public will be set forth as of at
least equal importance with the interests
tof the workers or the employers in each
industry.
' Any tribunal which permits the work
ers and the employers to co-operate for
their own profit, regardless of the public,
is pernicious.
1 UNINSTRUCTED DELEGATES
SOMETHING can be said in support of
the desire of a majority of the mem
fcers of the Republican national commit
"te that the delegates to the Chicago
Convention be uninstructed.
,W71m vtn Mnnrllrlnfo lino ft mnlnptti. nf
. . fy list) v .."-. ..-.. ..jvvjr w
ltrought about by combinations among
C? friends qf the different candidates,
Mrfteuier ueictjmeo uic iiuhuiwu uf jiuw.
Jflitl instructions are respected when they
Jve been obeyed on one rollcoll. After
that tho war cleared for whatever
' tb leaders plan to do. .
o i'U There are too many favorite sons,
g jjrvwu-flr-, for the wishes, of tle mem-
bers of the national committee to bo uni
versally regarded. The delegations
from many states will go to Chicago
committed to certain candidacies, whllo
every candidate will bo anxious to get
!, the support of the largo delegations from
Pennsylvania and New YorK. as tnese
two states could combine and bring about
tho nomination Of any candidate on which
the"y could agree, the matter of instruc
tions can be allowed to take core of
itself.
CHAIRMAN HAYS, THE PARTY
AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE
Leaders Who Will Predict the Results
of Universal Suffrage Must Be
Wiser Than Solorhon
rpHE hope and faith of a great many
- ardent advocates of equal suffrngo
are founded upon the oldest human tra
ditions. They firmly believe that women
are at heart better than men.
Conventional pleas for the vote have
always takerfthe form of appeals to ra
tionality, to logic, to common justice, to
common sense. But behind every prac
tical consideration there is often an in
stinctive reliance upon the familiar con
seivatism of women, on their instinct for
good order and on their habit of devo
tion to humane causes. Voes expressive
of such attributes are still depended
upon to humanize politics and exalt
political aims.
Now, Mr. Hays, national Republican
chairman, may feel this way about it.
There is no telling. In his appeal to the
states for immediate ratification of the
national suffrage amendment, party
idealists will see a desire to summon the
best resources of the national mind and
spirit for the hard decisions of 1920.
It will be far more reasonable to view
this summons from the national com
mittee as a forward move in the efforts
which both parties are making to mo
bilize feminine sentiment against the
Great Day. All political leaders of the
first magnitude arc frankly eager for
the good will of the 28,000,000 new voters
of the near future. They yearn to get
these voters safely under 'party wings.
They pine for the privilege of tutoring
them in the ways of politics.
They are not visionaries. After Janu
ary only ten states will stand in the uay
of the universal franchise. New Jersey,
Kentucky, Maryland and Rhode Island
are reported ready for ratification. The
Colorado Legislatuie ratified the amend
ment yesterday, and thus twenty-two
states of the necessary thirty-six were
listed on the side of the suffragists.
With New Jersey, Kentucky, Maryland
and Rhode Island out of the way, there
will remain thirteen states which suf
frage leaders depend upon to sustain their
cause. These are Arizona, Connecticut,
Delaware, Idaho, Indiana, Nevada, New
Mexico, Oklahoma, Oregon, Vermont,
Washington, West Virginia and Wyo
ming. Nine of these states have already
granted full presidential suffrage to
women. Twelve of them are Republican.
Mr. Hays is a good chairman and a
wise one. Political leaders of both parties
are gradually becoming reconciled to the
inevitable. They have passed swiftly
from attitudes of doubt, ridicule, antag
onism, resentment and awe to a mood of
suave acceptance, knowing not what is
to befall in the end.
Mr. Hays is not playing an exagger
ated role in suddenly appearing in the
open as the official little father of suf
frage. 'The Democratic leaders, largely
because of the South, have always been
temperamentally opposed to women vot
ers. They cannot safely appear as pro
gressive as Mr. Hays, even if they wished
to.
Some of the qualms of uncertainty with
which routine politicians of all sorts view
the advent of universal suffrage arc justi
fied by the ardor and the mystic energy
of suffrage leaders in this city and else
where. They are establishing schools
of politics.
What is a ward? What is a division
leader and why? Why is Congress what
it is? Why do bosses survive? Why
do ward leaders lead? Women every
where are manifesting an ominous in
terest in these ancient and perplexing
questions. They are approaching their
investigations with a sort of fen id in
tensity. And yet the women who have
already voted in many of the suffrage
states have been a sad disappointment
to the idealists.
There is always Chicago, where the
women voters are reported to have aided
the wets and kept a wicked political ring
in power. Women, too, have been mani
festing a sort of class interest that puz
zles reformers who depended on them
too greatly. In some of the western
states, the women's vote has reflected a
greater liberality of thought, a genuine
concern with progress and the legisla
tion of humanity." But the difference
between the West and Chicago seems to
have been largely a matter of at
mosphere, environment and suggestion
rather than the reflection of a exclusive
feminine purpose.
The old cry has gone up. Women
voters, we are told, will be the mirrors
of their husbandi, their fathers and their
brothers. They may be finer tempered
than men, their opponents say. They
may have a greater devotion to virtuous
principles. But if you believe the people
who have been analyzing election re
sults in suffrage states, the loyalty of
women can never be definitely enlisted in
behalf of the abstract thing we call the
state because the state does not live, it
does not suffer, it is not visible, and
women, therefore, are supposed to be
unable to serve it as they serve in the
routine ways of everyday existence.
Suffragists cannot bo blamed if they
are irritated profoundly by these super
ficial deductions. They hov not tho
knack of discrimination and leadership
in politics. How could they have 'it?
How ever were they to have been
trained ?
Universal suffrage is much like the
league of nations. It will not emerge
out of chaos as a perfect thing. It will
need practice and refinement. It is fatu
ous to suppose that women will always
drift or he led in politics, They may
EVENING PUBLIC
lose sight of many technical details of
the game. They may oven bo fooled,
slnco It is their wish and their habit to
believe. But their concern is with life
and tho means of life. They will feel,
if they do not always think, in the devi
ous ways of political organizations.
Unquestionably they will be a power
behind all legislation7 that is intended
to make life more tolerable for women
and children in industry and they will
be a terror to those who oppose that sort
of legislation. They nro diffident and
shy for a time in politics. They could
not be otherwise.
"You never can tell what a womnn
will do."
That fearful thought will haunt a good
many bosses in tho years to come unless
wo arc mistaken. It is questionable if
vomcn voters will ever be as amenable
to party rules as men have been.
They nro mysterious. Lately they have
been complaining that clothes designers
enslave them. They are afraid of many
harmless things of cows, for example.
But tho lord of creation, who is begin
ning to feel again that he nlone is quali
fied to vote, ought to think again.
Women do not hang about street cor
ners. They do not sit up all night to
play poker. They do not meet secrotly
to hatch wars. They do not fight police
men and they did not loaf in saloons.
Women may be unable to cope with
some of the physical stresses of modern
life. But that is not because they nie
not? strong. They will cling to desolated
hearths and hold tho order of existence
together, and wait and smile and be
patient in storms of trouble from which
a man would flee to the neaiest dock for
a jump out of a world grown too hard
for him.
THE WRONG WAY TO DO IT
T EADING members of the Governor's
-"' constitutional commission, in session
in Harrisburg, are said to be assuming
that their duty is to rewrite tho consti
tution so that the calling of a (constitu
tional convention shall bo unnecessary.
When the law authorizing tho Gover
nor to appoint the commission was
passed, it was not understood that thi3
was to be its function. It was to study
the constitution in tho light of modern
conditions with a view to discovering
what changes ought to be made and to
report to the next Legislatuie. The law
authorizes it to recommend the best way
to have these changes made. Under this
gianft of power it can, it is true, advise
against a constitutional convention.
It would be a grave mistake, however,
for the commission to assume that a con
stitutional convention is unnecessaiy.
The only pioper way to revise the con
stitution and biing it up to date is
through the election of a body of dele
gates by tho people and by commission
ing those delegates to do the work.
Twenty-five men and women cannot)' do
it. Though they were tho ablest twenty
fivo citizens of the commonwealth they
could not propel ly speak for the people
of the state without a mandate of tho
electorate. It is not democratic, that is
to say, truly representative, to make a
constitution in such a way.
When the commission was appointed
it was understood that it was to clear
the ground for a convention by doing
some of the pieliminary work. It was
expected to point out the in&nsistencies
in the present document and to show how
they could be removed and how tho con
stitution could be simplified by tho omis
sion of all the present complicated re
strictions upon the Legislating and by
pioviding for a grant of power with
wide discretion in its exercise.
Instead of doing this, however, the
commission is considering such a silly
provision as that all bills passed by the
Legislature should bo punctuated be
fore they are passed, and other provi
sions that have no place in the funda
mental law.
If the apparent purpose of the com
mission is carried out it will be impos
sible to put any of the amendments into
effect until the beginning of 1924. And
they cannot go ino effect even then un
less two Legislatures consent to submit
tliem to the voters in November, 1923.
If the commission were devised solely J
as an expedient for delay, its course
could not be more ably directed to that
end than it appears at present.
In Mr. Moore s (onp
Literary Note serial, "The New
PubUc Safetj Direc
tor," the gifted author lins coMtmed to cause
rising interest with everj succeeding chap
ter, and It is confjdentlj expected that the
concluding installment, wliieii ue are in
formed will appear "within a few dajs"
will fullv justify the hopes of au enthi ailed
community.
The poem on the Iraperator written by
the Earl of Limerick, bewailing the absence
of liquor, should properlj hae been writ
ten in the mcaBiire his name has made fa
mous. As for instance:
A tar who was dry as a crater
Went to sea ou the ship Impcrator
But the absence of booze
Has affected the muse,
So I'll finish this Limeruk later.
The evidence is unmistakable that the
government, demanding a show-down, ex
ecuted a back-down in the coal situation.
Hut n retreut may bo strategic rather than
an evidence of defeat
Ever and anon police c.ourt items bring
home to us the fact that among the highly
paid professions must be included that of
begging on tho streets.
Doctor Garfield is Uearh within his
rights in resigning and the public similarly
intrenched in Its priulege to take his de
parture ph!I6sophirallj
Life would be far more terrible than
it is if world problems did not hae the
habit of eventually solving themselves.
A conference is being held in this city
on ministers salaries The men most con
cerned admit that these are small matters.
"We're all torry that Doctor Garfield
feels as he does he's done a fine job," said
Secretary Tumulty. Resigning?
Not only the wicked walked in slippery
places yesterday.
Doctor Garfield has wandered off into
lightlcss and heatless night.
LEDaER-PfllLADEPHIA SATURDAY, DECEBIBEE 13,
MAYOR-ELECT MOORE'S
LETTER
Congressman Mondcll Was a Cowboy.
Who Became Mayor of a Western
Town and Carries Bullets
Around With Him
piItANK W. MONDRLL, the Republican
leader of tho House of Representatives,
whom rx-Liciitcnant Governor Frank Mo
jlnln Introduced to the Terrrfpiu Club at Its
recent dinner, was once mayor of a town in
Wyoming. He had been a cowboy anil had
eujojed the experiences of a frontiersman.
The major's job didn't pay much, but
j citing Mondcll took It ns a step toward
other things, Uc soon found something to
do. A bunchy of roughnecks come In one
day and began to act In n manner which
called for the exercise of authority. Frank
went out to do the job and succeeded, nl
though it required considerable shooting on
both sides. The Republican leader still
carries a couplo of bullets which dug into
his boilj on that day. Hut thek incident
proved his gamonoss and helped hlin In
after life. He might have been governor of.
AVjoining several years ago, but report in
Washington is that he would rather wait
for the United States Senate.
CONGRESSMAN LaGUARDIA, of New
York city, recently elected president of
the board of aldermen a powerful position
in thp metropolis is n delight to the Ital
ians of the country. He has been a guest on
several occasions in this city, where the
active men of Italian birth or descent
cstccmhim highly. Some of them arc even
suggesting that the New York member might
oome forward some day as a vice presi
dential possibility. LaGtiardia, who hos had
experience in tho consular service abroad,
came into Congress, a Ilepublicnn, from a
district that has gcncrall gone Democratic.
He enlisted for tho war and distinguished
him&elf in aviation in Italy aud over Austria
where he led sonic of our flying forces. It
was this record taken with his popularity
among the Italians in New York that helped
him beat out Tammany.
BIG Tom Cunningham, leader of the Re
publican Alliance, and George W. Coles,
leader of the Town Meeting party, arc
strong on duck hunting, but they don't like
it in foggy weather. On a trip Co the
ChesapcaRo, these Philadelphlana evinced
every desire to meet tho canvasback on his
own ground, but each morning the fog
bettlcd down just about starting-out time,
which, by the way, is 4 o'clock In the
morning. As "the early bird catches the
worm" so does the early riser get the duck,
u piece of philosophy that might be attrib
uted to that old-time I'hiladelphian, Bill
Douglass, ex-county commissioner, who has
become a solon among the duck hunters of
the Chesapeake.
-pvAVID J. SMYTH, the new city solicitor,
X and Commodore Louis H. Eisenlohr have
been swapping western experiences. Each
of them for a time, earlier in life, bpent
.omo stirring days in the bad lands of tho
Southwest. flew people in Philadelphia
know it, but "Commodore Lou" was once
n deputy sheriff when few men wanted to
hold down the job. That was in the days
when train robbers and desperadoes were
doing battle with the -vigilantes. The
commodore says he never aspired to be
sheriff because in the county where he
berved as deputy the records showed that
no sheriff up to his time had died a'natural
death.
GEORGE W. COLES, who led the Town
Meeting party to victory in the recent
mayoralty ""ampaign, is a native of Ljkcns,
the coal town which nestles in tho moun
tains of Dauphin county ; nnd Lykcns Is a
town where the Coles name is familiar -Jo
almost every bodj in it. The father of George
, now past seventy, is superintendent of
one of the mines. He came from Welsh
stock and is popular with the old settlers.
One of the customs which holds in the
Coles homestead is the killing of the steer
at Christmas. The Coles boys, and there
arc half a dozen of them besides George, get
together with the home folks and after the
bhooting match, which is a part of the day's
festivities, beparate the edible part of the
btecr from the hide and hoof, and distribute
it among the neighbors. The Town Meet
ing party leader is generally in at the
killing.
-1EOBGE T. GWILLIAM, for a long time
secretary of the Philadelphia Engineers'
Club, like Congiessmau George S. Graham
and Lawyer James M. Beck, has one foot
in New York and one in Philadelphia. The
Gwilliam Co., of which George T. is the
head, throws its sign across one of the
prominent thoroughfares in New York,
although the directing genius Insists upon
keeping up his voting residence iu Philadel
phia George brings back the New loiK
news to a little group of clubmen known as
"The Mariners," talking yachts with Sam
uel T. Kent, the president, and automobiles
with Howard B. French, of the Chamber of
Commerce. Gwilliam knows a lot about
iho French genealogy from Its early origin,
which is naturally pleasing to the bead of
the big Philadelphia paint house.
Ql
UITE a number of prominent Philadel
phians, including W. W. Frazier, Mayer
Sulzberger, John T. i;mlen anu Samuel
Fels, are interested in the work of the
national association for the advancement nf
colored people. Isadore Martin, secretary
of the Philadelphia branch', of which Dr. J.
Max Barber is president, claims a member
ship for the general association of 00,000.
The association hopes for the advancement
of the colored man, and some of the local
adherents point to the case of W. Basil
Webb, who started us a messenger in the
Mnvnris office twenty years ago and is still
a messenger. They say nico things about
Webb and insist that he has executive
ability and diplomacy, which most visitors
to the Mayor's office will confirm.
-pv. KNICKEUBACKEH BOYD, chair
JL man of the executive committee of the
Philadelphia planning conference and a
member of the Philadelphia Chapter Amer
ican Institute of Architects, has written to
Colonel Furbush, the incoming director of
public health, concerning the relationship
which exibts between sanitation and city
planning. The architects, theAre under
writers and various other organizations bold
the opinion that there is a yery decided
community of interest in this regard and
tbey also draw uttcntlon to the fact that
bo council of associated building trades
looks with favor upon city planning, espe
cially sl"ce 'l contemplates the establish
ment of comfort station8
T)ANK PRESIDENT CHAIILES S. CAL
JJ WELL thinks the Comnlercial Museum
bhould be made the nucleus lor a larger
institution on the Parkway. He likes the
Bush terminal scheme in New York and
thinks buyers would bo attracted to the
city if ucl1 an Institution were established
here Mr. Calwell also takes a more than
ordinary Interest In the Delaware river.
He observes im? waterways leading to trunk
lines a fine -opportunity for agriculture and
..Aa In cnnprnl. f
Vi comra"" J. HAMPTON MOORE.
X -N -STAJ2T '"
THE CHAFFING DISH
In Manayunk
AMIDST the crooked streets and dirty mills
In strange nnd devious paths their lives
must go
Who live on Cinnamlnsou, Conarroc,
And practice Alpine climbing o the hills.
How steeply down tho cobbles slides the Milk
On wintry mornings, wltlui windward luich
Disposing him, and others of his Ilk,
To lactlfy the steeple of the church.
When mall adorns the slippery garden path
Oiir apoplectic gran'thcrs groan aud pant
With rusty knee nnd ankle protestant,
And threaten waistcoat buttons in their
f wrath.
If one had nightmares, cxther years, when
drunk,
One climbed unending sleeps in Manayunk.
ALEC B. STEVENSON.
The cruel cruller continues its conquering
path. Our cheerful haunt, the little waffle
shop on Eighth street, has jettis-oned its grid
dled batters aud npw deals only iu "cream
doughnuts." The next step, we foresee, will
be a convention of doughnut dippers, prob
ably held at Fryburg, Pa.
.
Speaking of the origins of modern slang,
the first instance of "calling it a day" oc
curred in the fifth verse of the first chapter
nf Genesis.
It was distinctly promised us, in the same
(jrst chapter of Genesis, that man was to
have dominion over every creeping thing;
but we have never yet seen the human being
who could get the better of an athletic aud
mature cockroach.
Brooding over these things, it comes to us
that if the forty-four-hour week had pre
vailed in the Garden of Eden the creator
would never have had time to make woman.
And th,e Garden of Eden attitude toward
prohibition may be deduced from the name
given to the first of all rivers. If you don't
believe us, turn to Genesis ii, 11, and see
what they called the stream Adam had to
drink from. "The name of the first Is
Pison.".
Adam really felt that Paradise was Lost
when they took the movies away from him.
For, as Milton says in his justly celebrated
scenario dealing with the subject :
Michael from Adam's eyes the film re
moved. Hospital Corridors
ALL hospitals have flower beds,"
You may see them bloom
At evening after lights arc low
Beside each quiet room.
Roses there, and violets
In nests of living grass, v
They bend to kiss the nurses' feel
Aud watch the doctors pass.
They seem to be quite happy there
And do not mind the pain.
For flowers live where they are loved
And are at home again
Wherever thero is suffering.
Tbey have seen death too near
To close, for him, their colored cups
Or look on bim with fear.
BEATRICE WASHBURN.
Desk Mottoes
In this country, riches constitute a greater
bar to scholarship than poverty.
ISAAC SOA.RPLESS.
Bobert W. Chambers wasnU such a bad
nroohet. In 1805 ho publlshed book called
'The King In Yellow." This is how it
begins:
Toward the end of tho year 1920 tha
Government of tho United States had prac
UoaJljt oompJoted the program adopted
during: the last months of President Win
throp's administration. . . , The war
with Germany had left no visible scars
upon the republic.
I Apd, speaklos of prophecy, how's thUT
.
-1919
AS WE VSAW IT
Ben Jonson, in "Every Man in His Hu
mour," which the erudite Quizcdltor has
been re-reading, gave the first solution of
the Mexican problem. That was in 1C98:
Tho bastlnndo ! a most proper and suffi
cient dependence, warranted by tho great
Carranza. Come hither, you shall chartel
him; I'll show you a trick or two you
shall kill him with at olcasure.
Meditating on unsuccessful plays, as one
might conceivably do, we picked up one fa
mous first-night flop, since printed, and read
the pieface. There we found:
It were unnecessary to enter Into any
further extenuation of what was thought
exceptionable In this play, but that It has
been said that tho manager should have
prevented some of the defects before Its
appearance to the public. . . . Tho season
was advanced when I first put the play Into
Mr. Harris's hands. It was at that time at
least double tho length of any acting
comedy. . . . With regard to some par
ticular passages which on tho first night'B
representation becmed generally disliked.
I confess that if I felt any emotion of sur
prise at the disapprobation it was not tliat
they were dlsappioved of, but that I had
not before perceived that they deserved It.
The above does not refer to some recent
play produced in New York by Sam Harris,
but is from Sheridan's preface to "The
Rivals," 1775.
Mr. Wlllium JI. Wills writes to us that
our postal card, mailed to him on April 28th
ultimo and addressed correctly to his office
at 1225 Arch street, has just arrived.
It occurs to us that we had better get
busy and send off our greetings for Christ
mas, 1020.
One of our cheery clients, whose name we
can't decipher, has been listening to the
organist at our favorite movie theatre. And
he says that the other evening, while cam
paigning pictures of Lady Astor and hus
band were being shown, the ingenious or
ganist played "If You Can Tame Wild
Women, Won't You Tame My AVife for Me."
A Plea
pvOWN a deep cauyon in the western land,
'-' With the black rimrock frowning over
head, Lletho last two of some brave Indian band,
Peaceful and lone in their last narrow bed.
The smell of sagebrush, pungent as the sea,
No niore will greet their nostrils on the
height ;
But who can say that still it may not be
In some rich hunting ground their souls'
delight?
This was their land; this wealth of hill and
plain, .
Theirs not by right of conquest but by
birth,
And fyou who plow their fields, who reap
their grain,
Begrudge them not their little piece of
earth. . D. P. W.
"Help! help I Mad clog!" cried some one.
"Wisdom is better than rabies," retorted
Dove Dulcet, as he hastened in the opposite
direction.
And it is sad to think, said the philosophi
cal bartender, that a mad dog is the only
creature that has a chance to foam at the
mouth nowadays.
We Are Enigmatic
We have received an earnest inquiry as to
what we meant when we said that the Uni
verse was.Dlctated but not Signed, i
In accordance with our stern policy, we
refuse to amplify this hard saying. We will
even make It harder by remarking that wo
are not nt all certain whether the StenogA
Tapher saved a carbon copy in the files.
Any rigid theory of life, we might add, is
about as uncertain as a savings account at
the North Penn Bank.
Life Is replete with small irpnles, we ven
ture Think of the satlrjc sensations of the
director general of railroads when he sees
the children at Christmas time having such
I a good time with the toy trains.
soqnATisa.
Ji
x
THE ROMAN ROAD
I LOVE the grass -grown Roman road
Crossing the bosom of the downs,
To conjure up tho life that flowed
From all the busy, bygone towns.
Beneath the sward, the sullen ground
Once echoed to the rhythmic tread
OfmarchtSj legions, northward bound,
Marking the highway with their dead.
I love to stand where Caesar stood
Gazing across the smiling shires.
The same clean wind that cooled his blood
Tempers the sun's enlivening fires,
The dappled fields stretch far aud wide
A gentler kind than Caesar trod,
When ruthless Saxon hordes defied
Tho maker of the Roman road.
The ramparts that hid fighting men
Arc carpeted with green and gold,
The cave that was a wild beaBt's den
Now serves a plowman's gear to hold.
The road that echoed to the tread
Of inarching legions, northward bound.
Is hut a highway of the dead,
Dear Nature's happy hunting ground.
F. Ci Breton Martin, in the Spectator.
If the price of coal is raised following
an increase of wages to the coal miners,
there is nothing to prevent tho government
from investigating the coal business nnd in
cidentally discovering whether or not the
excess charge is justified.
Wluxt Do You Know?
QUIZ
1. Who is the newly elected president of
Switzerland?
2. What is the capital of Minnesota?
S. How old was Cleopatra at the time of
her liaison with Blare Antony?
4. How long was James A. Garfield Presi
dent of the United States?
5. Who were tho Hellenists? L
0. What is nenuphar?
7. From what town in France does vaude
ville take its name?
8. How is the surname Cockburn pro
nounced in England?
0. The word plaza is sometimes pronounced
as though it were spelled "platsa."
Why is this incorrect?
10. Name three commanders on the British
side in the American revolution.
Answers to Yesterday's Qulr
1. Hansom cabs take their name frorq
Aloysius Hansom, of York, England,
who was their inventor. Hig dates
are 1803-1882.
2. Skagway, Juneau and Sitka are Alaskan
cities. ,
3. Slax of Baden was the last chancellor of
the German monarchy.
4. An odalisque is an eastern female slave
or concubine.
5. A seismograph is an Instrument indi
cating the place and force of earth
quakes. 0. Roosevelt settled the anthracite coal
strike in 1002.
7. The hanging gardens of Babylon were
four acres or garden raised on a base
supported by pillars towering in ter
races one above the other 300 feet iu
height. At a distance they are said
to have looked like a vast pyramid
covered w'lth trees.
8. The Novum Organum was the chief
philosophical work of Francis Bacon,
published In 1020.
0. The frequent occurrence of the number
forty-ln the Old Testament has been
explained by the fact that the original
Hebrew employed a word meaning
forty to express "a great many" in
an indefinite sense.
10. Frauk II. Hitchcock was postmaster
general in Taft's cabinet and managed
the Taft campaign for the presidency
In 1008. He was also campaign man- '
ager for the nomination of Hughes in
1010. Gilbert M, Hitchcock is Demo
cratic senator from Nebraska,
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