r
I-
t
IS'
&
I
r
-' S
iv
kix
B
10
luenms "Public Hedger
t PUBLIC LEDGER COMPANY
f' -L .CTllUS H. K. CURTIS, rursjDEsr
'Jrffr' H. Ludingtpn Vice Prerlilenl. John r.
lirUn,8rrtUry anl Trmurri Philip fl Oolllnn.
AM B. Williams, John J. Spurgcon, Directors.
V
EDITOMALi UOAHDf
druvm If. Iv. PrnTm. Phalrman
fciVTO E, RMILEY
.Editor
SJOltN C. JIAIITIN'.. . .General Duslnoss Manasrer
2
TubUhn dally tit PcBLid I.Enarn. IlulMlnr
Iniitrwntinr. Rnuirk. f'Mlnttolrtlitu
Ainnu .uii . jTrju-iHia
.TtlKTIo ClTr........ ... . Prfsn-tiiimt DtilKllne
.-.r : -?" ,- v".v;:j "-
WW YOBK
. sua Jletrcinoiitin Toner
oit. Till l'ord Ilu dta
Loru.al , ....... 1U1S milfrton Jlulldtne
ao. laus rijauiia jjuuuidi;
kcws cuncAUsi
IwiSEtKOTo.v Durmtt,
j N. 11. Cor. reninjlvntila Av. nttJ 14th St.
rlmr Yomc ncniuir "io Him liuildlns
Xoncon Bnuu,,.. London Times
r v subscription- turms
, .-The nvEMNn Public Lnrfltk Is nerved to mo
etibers In Philadelphia and Pi.roundlng towns
fit th rata of twelve (12) cents per week, payable.
By mall xo'pohiU o'Hslds of Philadelphia. In
the United States. Canada, or United States ros
eKUloni, . oitngB free, fifty (.10 . rents pr month.
bix ui uoimr pej" year, pavauio in unvnm-e.
jo. au
forelcn countries one ($1) dollur P-r
Biomn.
Notic Rubcrlbers wlhlnc address chained
Must give, old os well as new address.
I SELL, MOO WALNUT
KEYSTONE, MAIN 300H
S3 Addrttn all oammunteaflous to Kvenlno Pallia
JiCaocr, inacvenaence square, x-inmunjjrMu.
m i Member of the Associated Press
f 'TlW ASSOCIATED PKVSS h cxclit-
Mvelv entice, to the use for i cpuhllcallon
0f all ncics dispatches credited to It or not
otncneUa' credited In this paper, and also
ibo local news pubUxhctl thocln.
All rights of republication of special dis
patches herein arc also reserved.
PhlUJtlphU, Mondir, Demnher 8. 1919
THE CENSUS MAY TIP US OFF
TlHE census-taker candidates vvho are
'now being examined in this district
will, if chosen, doubtless peiform their
task in the usual loutine way and will
probably think little more about it.
Presumably they will be accurate, and
that ends their personal responsibilities.
Tlie sum total of their work, however,
should exert something besides a merely
Statistical influence. Stock will be taken
of Philadelphia's assets of population, of
property, of wealth, of industries.
Many of us are accustomed to believe
that we have a generally sufficient idea
of the subject, but it is questionable if
thjs is really so. In ten years this city
lia3 been vitally transformed. The
decade is one of the very greatest in our
history. It should be a stimulus to
realize this fact.
Sometimes it seems a pity that cen
suses in this region are not taken
oftener. They would counterbalance
many absurdly disparaging sentiments,
stir civic pride and provide an antidote
for the larsitude which accompanies a
misconception of facts.
Philadelphia is not a "boosters' town,"
and in that respect there is cause for
rejoicing. But on the other hand we
must learn to appreciate our vastly
changed condition. That would make
for the soundest sort of progress.
'The census ought to be an excellent
tip.
A THRIVING INDUSTRY
SINCE the beginning of the year 2040
automobiles have been stolen In this
state, or more than forty a week. It is
f&. estimated that the cars were worth
$2,000,000. Only 272 of them have been
I-; recovered by the authorities.
XThls is not a record which the police
-Authorities can regard with complacency.
They cannot be proud of recovering only
one car in seven And so long as the
chances of ca'pture are only one to six
the automobile thieves are not likely to
cease the'ir activity,
"It was assumed that after the Legis
lature provided a maximum penalty of
StKftflfl Ami nnA fpn vnnro in itiil not Hiofc
tt' would be less frequent, but 1352 cars
ll8V lippn Ktnlpn einpo Ihn Inw svne
passed.
Something is wrong somewhere. Can
it be that, because nearly all cars are
insured against theft, the police are in
different? Or do the insurance com
'panies find it cheaper to pay the poli
'cies on the stolen cars than to chase'
down the thieves? Motorcar owners
would like to have these questions an
Bwered, for even though they may be
reimbursed, it is not pleasant to leave
a car standing outside of a house or
office building and then find it gone when
they wish to return home in it.
HE WAS RIGHT
STrHEN an eighty-year-old man fights
JviH " ' an armed highwayman because he
was confident that he had work still to
do and that his time to die had not come,
there can be no doubt that the man was
yi&ht.
This is what the Rev. John Stringer
did ,the other night. He pushed the gun
away from his body and struggled with
the highwayman for its possession till
the man was frightened and escapedMn
an", automobile.
Many a younger man would have said
to .himself that his hour had come and
would have submitted in the vain hope
that he might postpone it. Mr. String
fir's faith saved both his life and his
money.
Put what could the highwayman have
Ixeen thinking of in holding up a minis
ir? Preachers are not supposed to have
piny money. There would be richer pick
mgs in holding up some wartime profit
eers whose guilty consciences would
weaken their arms and destroy their
am-age. We are not suggesting that the
$,wefi$eers be forced in this way to dis-
rrKe, UUL i1'0 juoiujy juuivaung mat
does not pay to tackle the clergy.
EUGENIE AND HOHENZOLLERN
JTWE aged Empress Eugenie is back in
, Paris, quartered across the street
from the site of the Tuileries, of which
'alte once was mistress. Nearly fifty years
k if, partly through the efforts of Doc-
tpr ivvans, oi jrnuuueipniu, sue escaped
from the ruins of the fallen French mon-
'Her name was once spoken with bit
ttrfM&Si The regime in which she played
ban than the part of an ordinary wo-
1 k-u J !.a..l.l. J ,, M...W.V . c. Tnal
yvao ulBClcuibcu, n,a tauso MS lU9b
mm that of the Stuarts. Yet she lived
v-v4"wn the anathema. She won a new re
Hjfact for herself In her changed estate,
J j Of late years she has loved France,
"Without a shadow of selfish aspirations.
jjtaety-three, in full possession of
facuJtMS, she ia an extraordinary
WW.V..V,.. .-..-. .- -.- .-r- - ..T1-tf
JfcTMgjfo $ Spanish, of Grana -
dnn birth. Perhaps that accounts for
the dignity and respect with which, in
the end, she has been enabled to hedge
her personality.
In any event it is interesting to com
pare her rolo with the ex-knlser's. Will
William Hohenzollcrn enlist a spark of
sympathy should he attain his ninth dec
ade? Will he profit by a striking cr
umple of triumph over adversity and
disrepute?
UNIVERSAL PEACE ARRIVES
FOR ONE DAY EVERY YEAR
If Statesmen Would Climb Down and Mix
With the Christmas Crowds They
Might J-earn How to Make
It Permanent
TTIIEN Bolshevists sat down in a sol
' ' cmn council and moved to abolish
Christmas, it was clear that Russia is
still in a bad way. The demagogues hold j
still ill n uuu wujr. mi; ut...uH"6"-o '".
Russia, and if there is one thing that the
Chtistmas season does it is to relieve
the world for a glorious interval from the
tyianny of routine minds.
From now on humanity will move
with wisdom higher than the wisdom of
Mr. Lodge or M. Clemenccau and older
thsn the wisdom of any hchool of politics
or economy. The world is not free. It
is bound down by inherited formulas,
restrained and hampered by rules and
barriers created in a past concerned
only with expediency.
At heart people are generous. They
wish to be charitable, to be adventurous
Warning fingert. are raised against them
wherever they turn. They are implored
to be cautious and to be reasonable. Yet
caution and reason alone never accom
plished anything of worth. The foice
that moves the world takes possession
of men's minds and uses them to build
up or batter down. Soldiers and
prophets, an occasional statesman, an
occasional preacher know it and the rest
of creation follows in the paths they
have made.
And how do they go, these men? Back
always to forgotten ways of tenderness,
to a rule of compassion, to service in
behalf of great truths fixed forever in
a far time.
, Once u year civilization turns its face
from the earth to look up and follow
them.
Russia has gone mad by staring at
formulas. It is the last nation in the
world that can afford to abolish Christ
mas. '
Our own Senate would be belter if it
could be thoroughly saturated with the
spirit that interrupts the haid course
of common thought and action at seasons
lik this. After December 25 Mr. Fall
will continue to demand thaf Mexico
be cleaned bjblood. There will be a
renewed outcry from the prophets who
want to see a way cleansed with fire
for the feet of the concession holders.
The coal strike may continue to grind
on. Mr. Lodge will continue to lead the
hate song of the irreconcilables.
The ups and the downs, the ins and
the outs, everywhere will stiffen again
and go to battle. But for a few days
there will be a truce of sorts between
warring spirits.
It will be difficult to hate any one
very greatly. The rich will loosen up.
They will loosen up amazingly and their
limousines will bear gifts to humble
doorways. There will be no poor. No
one will be without friends. To be for
lorn will be to find the eager hands of
a multitude stretched out to you. There
will be a sense of peace and reconcilia
tion and achievement everywhere. The
world will be free in this interval of
vanity to practice its very real virtues.
And this will not be because of anything
that any one has said or done. It will
be because of something felt and under
stood in the hearts of people.
Somebody said that Christianity was
tried and found wanting.
"It was found difficult," said Mr. Ches
terton, "and it has never been tried."
The prospects for a merry Christmas
are good. After a reading of the dis
patches from Indianapolis and Wash
ington, Paris and London, a happy new
year becomes a matter of some doubt.
But you may look at the faces 6f any
crowd in any American city without per
ceiving the least sign of dread for the
future.
They are gay crowds; gay and assured.
Grievous economists insist ihat they are
spending too much money.
Obviously the crowds are spending too
much money. They always do. They
seem to have an instinctive knowledge
that economists have ngj:. It is said
that they go blindly and trust to Provi
dence. They are the children of wars
and explorations, of strength and of ad
venture, of hope and achievement.
It is more likely, therefore, that they
trust in themselves.
Christmas is educational if only be
cause it makes us think of the poor and
revise some of the current definitions of
poverty.
There is something the matter with a
time in which to be poor is to be ig
nominious. Poverty is a blight. It is
waste. But troubles and griefs are tho
common lot. The rich have a larger
and more elaborate assortment than the
rest of us.
Many people are poor by choice. You
have to buy riches, too, and there are
some who will not pay the price. They
prefer happiness to pleasure. And the
rich who find themselves free on one day
each year to follow their natural im
pulses and divide with their less fortu
nate neighbors can often purchase a
great deal of enlightenment with their
gifts.. They may find themselves occa
sionally in the majestic presence of a
part of humanity that gives not only
material things but all its days, the
strength and hopes and aspirations of its
youth and even life itself for the hap
piness of others. Those who know that
other half of the world have tho least
reason to feel that the Christmas spirit
is a superficial phenomenon.
It may be a bone-dry Christmas for all
we know the first in the history of
America. To a great many earnest peo-
. .-...-,..,-. ,. -j - , , -
1 pl, thaiprwV HV tk,ead,l
EVENING PUBLIC LEDGER
nf ihn world. Plum nnHHInir nnd mlncO I
pie are disastrously involved in the cru
sade for a dry planet. Hero, indeed, is
evidence of a dreadful oversight. But wo
suspect that life will go n if it isn't
remedied. To the multitudes who give
to the American Christmas its inner
character the dry law matters not at
all. That multitude is the young of the
land. It is only in the eastern cities
that n dry Christmas season is a novelty.
A goodtpart of the country has been dry
for years.
A declaration of war on Christmas
would bq unthinkable. Sheriffs delay
evictions at this season. People spend
moro money than they can well afford
to buy delight for little children. The
jingoes await fairer' times for their
work. Those who divide with others
are amazed to find that thougli poorer
they are richer. There is peace in Wash
ington and even in war the soldiers cease
rjnff
b'
Ono might disagree with Mr. Chester
ton's assertion that Christianity, being
difficult, was never tried.
It is tried on one day each year.
ENLIGHTENMENT A PEACE KEY
WILLIAM McFEE, British novelist
"of distinction and sound critic of
life, declared some months ago in this
newspaper that very few Englishmen, in
deed, had the least notion of what the
Louisiana Purchase was or of its pro
found bearing On the course of world
events. In other words, his compatri-
kots know little of American history and
they have had scant opportunity to re
pair their deficiencies.
It is a genuine and badly needed re
form, therefore, which is proposed by Sir
George Watson in honor of the forth
coming tricentennial celebration of the
embarkation of the Pilgrims. By the
terms, of his generous program his en
dowment of $80,000 is to be devoted to
a chair of American history to be es
tablished in a rotation system in Brit
ish universities.
It is hinted that perhaps one of the
new professors will write a book ex
plaining to his compatriots why the de
scendants of those Englishmen who
moved westward severed allegiance with
home and what they did after .the sepa
ration. Naturally the admirable and numerous
American works on this theme presup
pose on the part of the reader much in
formation not now imparted in English
schools. To be wholly intelligible to
the average Briton it is perhaps best
for a Briton to be the chronicler. Rhodes,
McMaster, Bancroft and Fiske will play
their roles when the ground plan has
been, laid.
The whole proposal is in line with
the most effective of all keys to inter
national "understandings the truth. Brit
ish ignorance of our annals has been
abysmal and often productive of wholly
needless misconceptions.
There are, of course, some Americans
who misinterpret England, but, on the
whole, our educational facilities are not
blameworthy. Next in importance to our
own story in our schools is unquestion
ably the study of what happened in the
land which planted the first English
speaking colonies here. It is occasionally
asserted that the American Revolution
is wrongly taught in this country, but
for those of inquiring minds there is al
ways 'Trevelyan to give a fair-minded
British view . "
With all due deference for our short
comings, it must be said that we know
more about England than she knows
about us.
Sir George Watson's attempt to strike
a balance is thoroughly heartening.
Properly developed it has potentialities
for peace which may press very hard for
first honors even the benign influence of
a league of nations.
Armenia is neither a
Clubs to Swat prosperous' uor u
High Prices happy country.' Its
history is one o out
rages and hardships. War has left it ir
tually without any currency. But its people
are far from beins wholly dependent on outi
side liplp. Scattered throiiRliout the country
ure 300 co-operative societies, 184 consumers'
societies, ICO credit societies and 25 produc
tive societies, lutviiiR, collectively, n member
ship of 300,000. If by this means little Ar
menia cun keep itself lve economically it
may be there is.he' . the germ of au idea for
the swatting of the II. C. of L. in this
country.
If the men laid off to
Speaking of Coal conserve coal arc idle
Conservation long enough they won't
have money to buy
coal, and 'when they starve to death they
won't need coal; and in due course' of time
some few survivors will realize that the
pressing need is production rather than con
servation, aDd that it is toward production
all efforts should be directed.
Tuel Administrator CJarfield, on hearing
of a suggested compromise of 25 per cent
advance for miners in Ohio, declared the gov
ernment had no objection provided there
was no increase in the price of coal, n js
a good stand if he can get away with it.
The nation thut doesn't sell more than
it buys can't -pay its debts. This occasion
ally puts a creditor nation at a disadvan
tage. It was a philosopher who anticipated
prohibition who amplified Shakespeare's
"Much virtue iu an 'if " with "but su
perior efficacy in a 'butt.' "
Perhaps sugar is not so great a food
necessity as wo suppobe. Our forefathers
waxed strong without it. And a slackening
of demand would mean a fall in prices.
Fashion Note The prevailing tints at
Ellis Island ore "pretty but not gaudy"
plalu red and yellow.
The President's mind is clear us a bell
as Fall told it. row let us hope the scua-
torial sickroom snoopers will ring off.
Evidence accumulates that the Mexican
Government indirectly provided ball for Jen
kins in order to save its face.
The dance of death the coal strike Is
trying to teach the country is uti involuntary
shivery shimmy,
V.vmiff tlmn n fimtlinll lipvn ,nc.u..,. l,
, ..TV... ....... .... ,a, ,i,,Mra MIIH
cbtrlibuUu. wustachc it's a touchdown.
- PHILADELPHIA, MONDAY, DECEMBER 8,.119'
FEWER CIGARS BEING MADE
But Anti-Tobacco Crusade Is Not Re'
sponsible; It Is a Matter of
Labor Scarcity
Uy UISOrtUE NOX McOAIN
FIU3D II. 1JELTZ, tho cigar manufac
turer who has nine or ten factories scat
tered all the way from the Lehigh county
line to the lower end of York county, Isn't
sitting up at nights worrying over the re
cently inaugurated anti-tobacco crusade.
Fact is he tore it leaf from the book of his
experience and told mo there were fewer
cigars manufactured uow than before the
war.
People smoking Ichm? Not n bit of it,
except as the output has diminished. This
is not because of compunctions ngalust their
use; it is n miration of labor.
The war decimated the ranks of cigars
makers just ns it uiii oncers In otner
trades, and now cigar manufacturers over
the country arc working overtime to make
up the shortage.
Of the millions of cigars manufactured
annually hi I'eimiylvuniu the greater part
is made in the towns and villages. Thou
sands of small farmers arc expert cigar
l oilers, and iu the winter, when furmwork
is at u standstill, they turn their hands to
cigariiinklug.
While Mr. Bellz did not throw any light
on the subject, I fancy that there arc tens
of thousands of American soldiers who,
before the war, smoked cigars, but ns a re
sult of inability to get them "over there"
found solace iu cigarettes mid hac stuck to
the m cer since.
As a consistent churchman and the father
of three sous who were in tho service, Mr.
licltz is, courteouslj speaking, of course, of
the prhate opinion that the anti-tobacco
crusaders arc chasing moonbeams when It
cities to barring n wcll-niudc cigar from
polite societj .
G1;
KOIttiU M. DALLAS was the only
Major of Philadelphia who ever reached
a sent in the United Stntcs Senate. Edwin
II. l'itler, before he became Mayor, tried for
it but failed. The fact is pertinent in con
nection with tho statement of Mayor-elect
Moore ia an address at Washington in which
ho stated that he was not giving any thought
to higher positions, but was devoting his
entire attention to formulating plans for
good government in Philadelphia.
Dallas was not chosen United States sen
ator until three jears after his term as
Major had expired. lie was both populur
and able. Filler's attempt was made two
j ears before ho was elected Mayor, and his
candidacy served to focus tho light of pub
licity upon him and brought him promi
nently to the front ns a mayoralty candi
date. This was in 18S5, when the independent
spirit ran high in the Republican party.
Don t'amerou had the iusidc track, and his
most formidable opponent, prior to the
caucus, was General James A. Beaver, of
Center county. So fearful vtcrc the Cumeron
people of a bolt that a written pledge was
circulated umong the independents whereby
the signatories agreed to support tho choice
of the cuueus.
Iu ilddition to Fitlcr Philadelphia pre
sented another candidate iu this caucus in
the persou of Congressman W. D. Kelley;
the others were Major A. M. Brown, of
Pittsbuigh ; General James A. Beaver, A.
W. Atchiusou and Douald Camerou.
At the eleventh hour Bcuor withdrew,
and it wns alwujs maintained that he did
So on the pledge of the Cameron people that
he would be ghen the nomination for Gov
ernor the ensuing year.
The pledge was kept and Ueacr wns
elected Governor.
ROBERT P. SMITH', of Cambria county,
who ns u member of the late federal
food administration was in charge of the
divisiou of trade distribution, regards the
present critical sugar situution from n dif
ferent angle from that of tho ordinary
eitieu.
It was Mr. Smith's duty for over a jear
to sec that no county or town in the state
was without sugur under tho government
rationing sjstem. Resultuntly there were
no famine spots during that time, and if
there was a temporary shortage the situ
ation was due to lack of railroad transpor
tation. Mr. Smith is of the opinion that there arc
considerable amounts of sugar hoarded in
the state ; not particularly by business
houses, but by thousands of housewives.
Those possessed of sufficient means to pur
chase au advance supply have, io thinks,
ample stocks laid by for emergency. The
elimination of the liquor traffic has created
nn increased demand for sugar for soft
drinks, while the manufacture of' candies
and chocolate confections lias increased
until today mire sugar is being used than
ever before.
Equalization of the distribution of sugar
stocks is, he asserts, one of the causes of
the present bugar shortage.. The failure of
the government to purchase the Cuban sugar
crop is alsopurtly responsible for the pres
ent regrettable condition!
There ure numbers of big conccrus who
use sugar for manufacturing purposes who
are purchasing sugar at prices fur iu excess
of tho fixed rate.
OEPRESENTATIVE JAMES FRANK--"
LIN, of West Philadelphia, emits n
semi-occasional inward groan over thn dis
heveled condition of the avenues of his
native city.
Oddly enough he, in great measure, ab
solves the street cleaning contractors. Not
necessarily because he is a friend of Senntor
A'arc's, but because he claims to have made
a study of conditions.
The former scrgcant-at-arms of Select
Council gives it ns his unbiased observation
thnt the citi.ens primarily, then the rag
pickers, and lastly the rubbish contractor's
employes are tho parties responsible for
the littered streets and trash strewn alleys,,
He says every citizen should be compelled'
to provide a refuse can with a lid instead of
theTopcu boxes and barrels filled to over
flowing, which several times a week flutter
the city's sidewalks. Rag pickers and paper
collectors who precede the contractors'
wnEons and scatter the contents of re
ceptacles should bo prohibited from plying
their trade ; and lastly the contractor's men
should be compelled to restore thercceptacles
In orderly way on the sidewalk.
The perfect solution, however, according
to Mr. Franklin, would be a house-to-house
collection, in which contractors would be
required to enter upon the premises nud re
move household refuse, thus avoiding -the
unsightly array seen so frequently upon the
streets.
"One of the first things -Mayor Moore
should do should be to appoint a commission
of disinterested citizens to consider this
question of usb and garbage collection. Study
it from every angle and make a comprehen
sive report of the best way of handling It.
When the city uuder the new charter starts
to do Its own collection, the ashes, garbage
and rubbish should be turned into an asset
instead of an expense. Other big cities work
on this principle and why uot Philadelphia?"
There ore some thousunds of citizens who
agree with Franklin.
Independent Socialists iu Lelpslc have
adopted a program'declurlng for the bovlet
yvKtem iu Germany evidently on the nrlu-
oiqle that i( crime more or Irs can make
I UUl,diwwa ou a Red calwwta.;;
"AW, COME
:v :
I
THE CHAFFING DISH
The Schuylkill
I SAW the Schujlkill river greasy-gray, x
Tho grimy barges drifting slow thereon,
And grunting through the dui. and dingy
dawn
Along the banks switch-engines at their play.
THE great gas-houses loomed cylindrical
By lofty chimney-stacks beforested;
An alley cat slunk by a battered wall,
And brindlc pups came down the river,
dead.
AT
EVENTIDE I crossed the bridge
n mil n !
With damasked domes, with gilded win
dows set
Rose up each humdr'um city minaret,
And chilly breezes blew on homeward men.
A?
i WINTRY oruuge flames out iu the sky ;
thought of other days, and rock-au -ne'
ALEC B. STEVENSON, s
Schehcrezadc has sent us a poem about a
harem. After having it on our desk for a
couple of weeks and looking at it a urfmbcr
of times, wc have decided noMo print it.
This will lead all our clients to think that
the poem is much tetter thau it really is.
Senator Fall says he noticed a certain
thickness in the President's speech.
And the President may, from time to time,
have noticed a certain thickness in some
senatorial heads, so honors are still evcu.
There seems to us a deal of Cnconscious
humor iu the agitation of some senators lest
the President should not be able to cope
with them mentally.
Desk Mottoes
A man looking for a pair of cars hates
to run up against a mouth.
ROBERT II. DAVIS.
The President's messago to Senator Moses
was witty enough. Wo only hope it won't
btart Moses bullrushing again.
A mun in Chieugo has invented a ucw
kind of internal combustion engine which
can be run by castor oil or whipped cream.
The news that these delicacies are explosives
is not new to any thoughtful student pf
human affuirs.
Where the Yangtse-Klang Meets the
China Seas
0
N THE stinking Ynngtse-Kiaug, where
it meets the China Seas,
There's, a little junk thnt's moored along
the side;
And the luteeu sails are flapping in the odor
laden breeze .
As the lazy prow is swung against tho tide.
Through the mad turmoil of shipping, while
the coolies sweat and scream.
There's a little craft that's floating calm,
serene;
And while river-mists are rising in a lazy,
hazy dream,
There's a girl that waits in purple silks
and green.
It's a palace on the water, Is that little junk
of mine,
(Though It's really but a bungalow in
f.Ue!)
But what makes it seem like heaven Is tho
fairy, starry gleam
Of' a pair of trusting Oriental eyes,
f
Now, you'll please excuse my raving, as I'm
going to leave you soon,
For I know a pliant waist I'd like to
squeeze ;
Pretty soon I'll whisper nothings in 'a junk
beneath the moon
Where the Yaugtse-KIang meets the
Chlua Seas.
ROBERT LESLIE BKLLEM.
Our genial friend McAroni was remarking
mi thn number of Spirit messages uusolnir
between this wprld aud th,iiixt "It seems
I faard,i tU ittWSHi'lw said. .''IWkm
g i, 'T'W",Yfcp-tT1- r- ..?,. -w.
itsL.
ON, LEMME GIVE YOU,
booucr get settled comfortably over there than
they are paged and told some ouc wants them
on the ouija board."
Beauty
(From Charles Baudelaire)
I AM sweet, oh Mortals as granitic dreams,
And on my breast nil men at last are
slain :
Toward me the poets' altar jets and steams,
Me, mute and deathless in my mortal fane.
A riddling Sphinx that reigns within the blue,
I blend swan-pallor with a heart of snow;
All frenzy hates me as a thing untrue ;
I have no teurs, nor laughter do I know !
THE poets, bent before my gesture high,
That I have &to,'i?n from the noble stone,
With waste of chasCi devotion, ltfe and die,
Adoring me, adoring me, alone;
Ah ! search these mirrors loveliness to see,
My eyes', my ejes' eternal clarity!
RICHARD DESMOND.
Happy Days In the Schoolroom
Sally waved her hand wildly. Sally,
whose ignorance of Genesis had been so ap
palling! The question which Miss Clarissa
was asking was, "What arc the laws which
warn us what not to do and where are they
found well. Sally?"
"We shall uot jay-walk nor slifill we
hick-cross found ou the front of tho trolley
cars!" exclaimed the triumphant Sally.
FLORA.
But What Does His Stenographer Say?
My vocabulary too has increased. When
ever I see a striking woid or expression,
I memorize it and use it in my dictation
or conversation. This has put sparkle and
pulling power Into my conversation and
business letters." From an advt. of a
Memory Course.
Wo remember some saying about excessive
felicity being abhorrent to the deities. Wo
may be wrong, and we often are, but as far
as we are concerned the mnemonic experts
would have more tractive force if tiey were
a little more richly endowed with verecundity.
Alas! We Didn't See Them
Dear Socrates I clipped your "College
Life on the1 Screen" for my brother-in-law,
Yale. '05. Did you see Mary Plcktord In
Daddy Longlegs? Her college study might
have been duplicated In any Tradlng-Stamp
Premium Parlor, and she wore, to pore over
her Latin lexicon, crepe de chine paj
unlonsanda pearl collarette. She'd patently
slipped up on the Freshmanvpible motto,
"Remember you represent Vassar on every
occasion." At least the movie orchestra
refrained from "Sing we our Alma Mater,
Hurrah for the Rose and the Gray."
M. V. N, S.
Collegevllle, Pa.
Our Hungry Clients
Dear Socrates I quite ngree with ybu
that 365 dinners should fall to the lot of all
of us; but don't you think It would'be good
fun to make one of that number a get
together? Perhaps this is "presumshlon"
on the part of so new a contrlb as myself ; (
but I'm sure a. Chafflng Dish supper would
be a real a'ffalr. I'll bring an escort and an
alibi and I know a dandy chophouse.
CECELIA,
Roy Helton, who knows more about Phila
delphia than any one we have met, tells us
that back In tho seventies the town was e-,
livened by a coachman-poet called Sutlilll.
The only trouble with his poems, Roy says,
after studying a volume of them at the Mer
cantile Library, was that they didn't live
up to his name.
We wonder whether any one remembers
him? We would like to know more about
hlra,
We are delighted to hear about that old
brojvn sweater the President is wearing. It
is a good sign, for when a man is given a
chance to wear his old clothes it shows he
feels better at once. And anyway nn old
sweuter seems n natural reaction on the
part of one who Jived so long in New Jersey,
SOCRATES.
The, cinder sifter grows itu fmportsuce ss
A LIFT!"
s,
OH, KEEP me close to Thee ! The sorrow
lies So very heavy on my soul tonight;
I kuow Thy way is best," but to my eyes
Tho 'tears unbidden creep, and dim Thj
light.
Ob, keep me close to Thee! The long, Iodr
strain,
Known but to Tbcc, has left me strangclj
chill;
Thy active world of color and delight
Dreams not its harshness to tho weak and
ill.
Oh, keep ie close to Thee! The little
things,
The small vexations that one scorns tu
heed,
Loom large because my heart no' longer
sings,
Too burdensome for one in utmost need.
Oh, keep me close to Thee! Draw once
again
Into Thy arms Thy weary, broken child,
As Thou hast done in many an hour of pain,
Since Thy light shone, and Thy love on
me smiled.
Ethel Bowditch Jones, In The Church
man. Time was when humorous parents eked
out the gifts in Christmas stockings with
pieces of coal stuck in the toes ; but present
inactivity InHhe mines will probably kill
this particular brand of humor.
True statesmanship consists in pronounc
ing a problem grave 'and then proceeding to
bury it.
What Do You Know?
QUIZ
1. Name an ornithological symbol for
happiness.
2. What is tho correct pronunciation of,
Arkansas?
3. What is a cheetah?
4. What is the name in England for a
railway switchman?
C. What character in Greek mythology had
100 arms?
0. What was the Battle of the Thames in
American history?
7, Whcre'TS the Black Forest?
8. In what year did William Jennings
Bryan resign as secretary of state?
0. Who painted tho picture the Moua
Lisa?
10: Where was Emma Goldman born?
Answers tp Saturday'sQuiz
1, The ex -Empress Eugenie is frdnety-three
years old.
2. The namo she Is adopting, in France Is
the Comtesse de Plerrcfonds.
3, Acedia is -sloth and surliness. It Is also
a mental disorder marked by apathy
and melancholy.
4.' Senator Fall represents New Mexico.
G. Rene Bazin is a French novelist, noted
especially for his scenes of country
life.
0. Previous to the war Flume belonged to
Hungary.
7. The new Italian ambassador to the
United States is Romano Avczzana.
8, A licentiate is the holder of a university
license or attestation of competence
from a collegiate or examining body.
The word also describes a licensed
preacher, not yet having appointment,
especially in the Presbyterian church.
0. Replevin Is restoration or recovery of
distrained goods on security given for
submission to trial and judgment. It
is also the name of the writ granting
1 ...the recovery.
10. -fa traveling westward around the world
a day (s gained at thS International
date iw In 'tbc-wkUk of th'kelUe
I SANCTUARY
hi
I
M
M?
i
'f
I
4
j
-i
VJ
A
n
el
-l
?i
i
H
:W
T
t,
.3
i
8
4
II
:
I
V
'&
: ' m '
i h
n -
.,- n
s...