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V 'THE EVENING TELEGRAPH
y PUBLIC LEDGER COMPANY
emus ir. ir. ramrts. ri.r.inrkT
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rtn x. ivmiams, jonn j, npurireon. uirecion.
p EDITOniAt. BOAnDi
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I'hiladrlphu, Turidy, Mir 13. 1910
NECESSARY PRECAUTIONS
ALL crowds that ever assembled for a
ii- spectacle in this city will seem small
in comparison with the multitudes that
will turn out to greet the Twenty-eighth
rDivision.
There will be a happier time for cvciy
body, including the soldiers themselves,
if the public will co-operate with the
police and do all that is possible to avoid
dangerous jams at what are assumed to
pc advantageous points in the center of
the' city. The line of the parade covers a
great distance and there ought to be
room for every one if the crowds are
evenly distributed along the route.
Thus the city can shout its welcome in
relative comfort and it will not have to
waste time that ought to be spent in
cheering m saying bad-tempered things
to the overworked police.
FOLLY'S ANTIDOTE: EXPOSURE
PROMOTERS of the superfluous and
pernicious anti-sedition bill in Penn
sylvania were probably far from Mr.
!VVilson's mind when he declared before
the French Academy of Moral and Politi
cal Science in Paris that the greatest
freedom of speech is "the greatest
safety." Hut the universality of this
truth serves to intensify its application
to specific instances.
The real danger lies in a gag that may
Rp capitalized as a grievance. The cx-
ftvisting laws in this commonwealth nio-
viue ample protection both against trca-
ifrjEOH ana sianaer. -liesinctions on iree
if'Spebch provide the very stuff of stagy
riiajii martyrdom.
Un tlie other hand, it is unquestionably
true, as the President has stated, that "it
is by the exposure of folly that it is de
feated." Thin is a comforting tip upon
yie outcome of the broadsides of oratory
which will sweep through trfe United
States Senate when the peace treaty is
introduced. The scene ought to beget
much hiore amusement than anxiety.
It is said that Alexander Kerensky
talked his government of Russia out of
existence. It is conceivable that if a cen
sorship had ever smote Mr. Bryan in the
days of his fervid volubility a Nebraskan
might have sat in the White House.
The suppression of numeious activities,
.harmless enough in peace times, is one of
jthe burdens of war. But the terrible and
.abnormal ace is endintr. Americans? wbn
r .'.' 1I l..i: . ,L. :.: ;
PW.iV M!,1,Jr UL"l: '" me intrinsic sanity aim
jsv common &ensc ot their liberal institutions
K5. cannot lecritimatelv withhold indnrkpmnnr.
&, of the President's sentiments concerning
W ie scope which all shades of opinion
:S ' should enjoy in the new era. Sound
views will he fortified with expression.
The other sort aie extremely likely to
perish of overexposure.
v Pennsylvanians have scant cause for
qualms. They are equally well protected
against senatorial absurdities or those
hich may be spoken or written in this
Btaie.
PRICE FIXERS IN A ROW
AT THIS distance the low between the
men who constituted the United
States industrial board and tho Demo-
& .cratic administration, which thnv ., ,.;
! lently criticizing because of thn fniin
& f.o( the plan to stabilize steel prices, seems
lormiess out lar reaching.
1 To an outsider it may appear that sta
bilized steel prices, if maintained for a
vhile longer, would have served to steady
'business and provide a clearer view for
businessmen and workers alike in a time
of change and confusion. The failure of
the industrial board, however, draws at
'tention again to the inconsistency of ad
ministration speech and practice. Mr.
"Wilson talks like a humanitarian. Tiia"
BaSes act like hard-driving efficiency engi-l?fJiieers.
r;vt '" lucftaoo ana nis successor in the
&'. " vnilVrtjiH mimmiafrnfinn ino.ntn.l
ifCt umiiuui..Uuuu jiiaiateu on uuy-
ing steel at the lowest cost and, with the
vjhlp of Congress over them, seemed to
.cijrc Httle what difficulties were placed in
tho wav of manufnrtiirpi-o twh. -f
Iharsn competition on the one hand mi M
?kclhe other the necessity for maintainintr J
SVj i,vwges ana living conditions suggested in
1S P"'l"' "' fc"'eiiva w mr, tuun.
Et. Tnv ib Jieeueu in tyasnington is a
&' W,Uhing of philosophies between the
BHtK.V"-!.l 1. -..1 1-- A il
Kjnwueui, wiio bpeans ior me govern
': iAtnt. and the men who wield cnvm.
f wwrtital authority in matters that actually
;voivo ousiness ana lapor.
S ILTt TTi7Ai3nn nnrl hie ilonaffiMnn .!...
liativ how wide and deen thn hrnnoh ;
r between the spokesman for the eovern-
fMftkt and the agencies that direct the
pfwcuv.u jioiiciea oi. mo administration.
OO0D MUSIC ALL SUMMER
ITOfi common impression that ooen-air
M, mliaic is a distinguishing characteris-'
te oft European Jife only is entitled to no
Itidcmrntin the JmiAjs of Piiiladelohians.
JityKKWito tli;jHBUai.iiw'tfee
Fairmount Park concerts, those by tho
Municipal Band furnish both education
and entertainment throughout the season
of mild or high temperatures. The last
nnmed organization, under Edwin Brin
ton's direction, will begin its long series
tonight at Twelfth and Spring Garden
streets. Concerts will be given in a dif
ferent locality throughout tho city for
six evenings each week until early in
September. "
Music lovers are thus provided with
admirable artistic fare, even though Mr.
Stokowski has temporarily laid nside his
baton and the costly opcia season is
ended. Untutored tastes in music need
not fear being baffled with the selections
played at these free concerts, nor need
tho alleged "high-brows" worry about
compromising with their ideals.
The balance between good popular
numbers and the classics is usually skill
fully preserved in the Municipal Band
prog-ams. "Going Up," for instance,
rubs shoulders with a Chopin polonaise
on the inaugural bill tonight. There may
even be a snatch of Wagner in the
"Echoes From the Metropolitan Opeia
House," which is also listed.
The success of the Municipal Band is
not measured in money, but in popular
appreciation. Here's hoping that the new
season will be more successful than ever.
MUST GERMANY BE SCOURGED
INTO A SANE REPENTANCE?
Only Alternative to This Peace of Jus
tice Now Offered Is a Renewal of the
Horrors of Punitive Warfare
WE CONGRATULATE the Germans on
' ' their perspicacity in perceiving that
the tieaty which theii representatives arc
asked to sign provides for what they call
"a brutal peace of force." They cannot
dwell on that phrase too much for their
own good. When it has sunk down into
their consciousness they will discover
that they are a defeated and not a vic
torious nation.
Their leaders know that they are de
feated, but these leaders have been fos
tering the belief among the people that
Germany was victorious or, if not vic
torious, that it was a diawn tight, with
honors even.
Germany sought to dominate the world
by brute force. She had to be combated
by brute force. When her military lcad
ei discovered that tho brute force ar
layed against them was greater than
they could withstand they asked for
peace. The result is a triumph of brute
force fighting for righteousness over
brute force fighting for ambitious greed
and lust for world dominion. One need
not feel squeamish about using the Ger
man phrase in describing the peace.
Tho protests from Beilin against the
rigors of the treaty, re-enforced by pro
tests from other German cities, are made
in the hope of influencing the weak senti
mentalists in other nations to demand
that their representatives in Paris let
Germany off more easily. They arc also
made for the purpose of backing up the
demands of Count von Brockdorff
Rantzau that the treaty be radically
modified.
It is not likely that this campaign of
propaganda will have any other effect
than to stiengthen the determination of
the peace commissioners to insist that
the tieaty be signed substantially as it
has been drafted. Those commissioners
hae not forgotten the Kind of a peace
Germany boasted she was going to make.
When they consider that boast they must
be surprised at their own moderation.
Not even wo in America have forgotten
the threat of Wilhelm to Ambassador
Gerard. Wilhelm, then the kaiser, was
protesting to Mr. Gerard against the sale
of munitions to the Entente Allies by
American manufacturers. He shook his
fist m the face of tho American ambassa
dor and declared that when he got
through with his European enemies he
would cross the ocean and dispose of us.
There was talk of demanding from us
an indemnity of billions under threat of
bombaidment of New York and the other
coast cities. This was befoic we had
entered the war and when we were doing
nothing which we had not a perfect right
to do. But'the Germans were determined
to take vengeance upon every one who
had put any obstacle in the wny of tho
success of their program.
If Germany had been victorious the war
would hae spread to this side of the
Atlantic and we should have been com
pelled to defend ourselves against the
most brutal armies which Imc taken the
field in modern times.
When we review the terms to which
defeated Germany must submit we must
not forget the terms which she would
have insisted upon if she had by any
chance taken any of our cities.
Across the ocean a victorious Geimany
would have annexed Belgium and would
have forced the Belgian people to pay
out of their poveity the cost of conquer
ing them.
She would have annexed northern
France, with its coal and iron mines, and
she would have seized and fortified the
French channel ports.
She would have taken Irelnnd under
her wing and organized armies there
under command of German officers.
She would have annexed the channel
islands belonging to Britain and used
them as naval bases.
She would have driven the British fiom
Egypt and seized the Suez canal.
She would have assumed the protec
torate over Morocco, now under French
direction.
She would have destroyed Italy's hold
in Tripoli.
She would have made demands upon
the Netherlands which that weak power
would have denied at the peril of its inde
pendent existence.
She would have set up Poland with a
German prince as king. She would have
put other German princes, the sons of
the kaiser, on new thrones in tbte Balkan
states and on the old thrones from, which
she had ousted kings unsympathetic with
her 'purposes. The maps f these new
states were drawn and the princes to
rule over them were named The wishes
of the jpfople were not to be consulted,
j:Tke,yjf ypte to be raadWynfMla of
EVEK8U PUBLIC LEDGER-PHILADELPHIA
Germany and subservient to tho will of
Potsdam.
Russia would have been dismembered.
It was dismembered by tho Brcst
Litovsk treaty.
Finland would have become a German
stato and, so far as possible, tho Baltic
would have been made a German sea.
In like manner tho parts of Russia "bor
dering on tho Black Sea would have been
brought under German control and that
sea would have been under German domi
nation through the compliance of the
Turk. ,
The British ports on the Persian gulf
would have become German and the
Berlin-to-Bagdad railway would have be
come a great German avenue of trade
from which the goods of other nations
would have been excluded so far as pos
sible. And Franco and Gieat Britain and
Italy would have been forced to pay the
cost of the war and to give up billions in
indemnities. German garrisons would
have occupied the principal cities of these
countries until tho money demanded had
been paid. It was boasted that the in
demnities would be put at so great a
figure that the garrisons would occupy
the cities for a generation at least. In
the meantime tho Gernfanization of
Europe would have been forced through
the suppression of all patriotic countcr
cffoits to preserve national spirit.
This is the kind of a peace which Ger
many would have dictated had she won.
It is the kind of a peace which she was
proud to maintain that she was fighting
to bring about. Alexander and Caesar
and Napoleon sought to conquer the
world, but they failed. Tho kaiser, "by
his mailed fist, was going to succeed."
Not cen the Germans can believe
down in their hearts that a hard peace is
forced upon them They have only to
compare what they are told to do with
what they planned to demand of their
enemies to discover that they have been
treated most mercifully.
Take, for example, the coal fields in
tho Saar valley. They have destroyed
the mines in tho north of France and it
will take years to restore them to thair
normal productivity. They are asked to
surrender the Saar coal fields to pay for
the French fields they have ruined. This
is simple justice. There is nothing
ictributivc about it. They must restore
Alsace-Lorraine to France. This is
merely giving back stolen goods. They
must make good the devastation they
wrought in Belgium. Thi3 is only fair.
They must surrender to a new Poland
tho Polish provinces which were annexed
generations ago without consultation
with the inhabitants. They planned a
vassal Poland. The treaty piovidcs for
an independent Poland. The treaty plan
is so much more equitable that no argu
ment is needed to establish its superior
ity. And reparation is demanded up to
the financial ability of the Germans to
make it. This ability is to be ascertained
ly commissioners familiar with the whole
subject.
But it is not necessary to traverse the
whole treaty. Its purpose is to establish
justice so far as that is humanly possi
ble and to produce conditions which will
tend to proent future wars.
The alternative to signing this treaty
voluntarily is signing a harder treaty at
tho point of the sword. There is nothing
that the rank and file of the Allied
aimics would like better than to have an
opportunity to get into Germany and to
let the German population see what war
is like. Their officers could not prevent
them fiom laing waste the towns; in
deed it would be considered necessary as
part of the lesson.
Such an eventuality must be prevented
if possible. But it cannot be prevented
if the German people, unconvinced that
they are defeated, insist that their dele
gates refuse to sign the treaty.
The Allied armies arc now on the
Rhine. Germany has no navy and no big
gum;, and she is short of food and fuel.
She is helpless. Marshal Foch has gone
to the front to bo ready for any emer
gencies and his men are prepared to
move at a moment's notice.
Germany and tho German people are
not yet repentant because they are not
yet sane. For the good of all mankind,
it is to be hoped that they will not com
mit the folly of refusing this peace of
real justice. We can only wait and
watch.
M a liif .1 o h n ,
tii'urp, who wu
W.
A Question Geary1, who whs a
delcsntp from Phila
delphia to the firt caucus o the new Amer
ican Legion at St. LouN, assures the world
thii1- the legion will not Ret into politics. No
one owr supposed that it would. The Grand
Army did nut intend to get into politics
when it wns first organized. The record of
whnt followed later alone sugRests a ques
tion tlint is sure to trouble the conscientious
lenders ot tho new soldiers' organisation :
Will polities get into the legion?
Poor Uncle Samuel !
Trouble! Trouble! Now it is the travel -vv
i B delegation o f
American-Irishmen who are threatening
him with reprisals nt the polls if lie doesn't
foiee Ilngland to do what is light hy tho
Little Green Isle. Every one knows what
n hard job is here involved for everybody's
uncle.
Said a man in a trol
Outdoor ..Sport ley ear: "Try taking
four of the drinks tlint
will not be available, after the 1st of July
and then go down Chestnut street and pro
nounce the names of the places where our
men won undyiug glory as they arc writ
ten on the blue banners put up for the lads
ot the Twenty-eighth. There is more ex
citement in that sort of thing than you
would suppose."
Criticism in thlf man
Tlie Old Story made world Is ever
one-sided. Some one
says that the spring styles for women are
indecent. Nobody says anything about the
vests and ties and hatbaDds that men are
wearing.
Xp luxury was so wasteful as German
militarism, and the tax laid upou it at Vcc
Bailies la naturally proportionately high.
"Vare champions party elections" Bays
a headline. Needless to specify what party
he means.
The permans are complaining because
the treaty rpos them pr tseir honor'
honors' No.
WOBdw tim !JU UJWjptfrl;
vi)- IIIMiWMIB fc fcF wf
ANGLO-AMERICAN FRIENDSHIP
How Years of Foolish Prejudice and
Ignorance on Both Sides Have
Hampered Relations
Hy WILLIAM McFEE
l.nflneer Lieutenant, IlrllUli NaT?
Foltbicinff is the concluding installment of
the notable letter of William McFcc, the
Iltitish novelist, to his American publishers,
ia tchich he discusses the ignorance of
Ameiica tchich prevails in England,
II
I DON'T soy X saw all this (the imperfccr
tions of the British educational system)
ns clearly then as I do now. I nm looking
back, I do know, however, that It didn't
satisfy me personally. The eternal smug
ness and sclf-satlsfnction got on my nerves.
I cut loose and went to sen.
It is n sad and disconcerting fact that the
most ignorant and bigoted nntl-Amcricnns
are to he found on British merchant ships.
In part this is due to tho very narrowing
educational system which I have mentioned
nnd in part to the fact that the water
fronts ofs United States ports, like water
ports elsewhere, do not contain the elite of
the nation. The British shipmaster found
that flhnstcr awaited him If he relaxed for
a single moment his business vigilance while
in nn American port. The age-old theory
that a senfai'ing man is half-witted, be
cause if he were in his senses he would not
go to sen, was strongly held in American
shipping circles.
"Swnt the skipper" was a popular; slogan.
"He's only a lime-juicer soak him on his
manifests.
This reacted unfavorably upon the general
opinions of American ethics held in our
merchant service. The skipper who had
suffered financially from American sharps
retailed his experience nt the cabin table,
in his owner's office, in his own parlor, and
it all helped to confuse our ideas nnd
strengthen the life-long prejudice against
America.
I CAME up ngninst this w'ith tremendous
force in 1014. I had been three years in
America, living among Americans and sail
ing out of American ports iu American
ships, nnd the chief impression I had gath
ered from old residents who had never been
out of their native state, from wealthy pas
sengers I had met in the West Indies nnd
fiom American shipmates was their un
quenchable interest in England and the
English. I could not tell them enough about
my country. I was reprimanded for tho
national vice of reticence and stnndoffish
ness. They wanted to know. They wanted
to admire. It warmed my heart to hear
them. And it warms my heart now to re
member it.
But when, in the great emotional up
heaval of 11)14, I made my way home to
England and began to sail under tho red
ensign once more, I was nstounded nt the
solid mass of blind prejudice nnd ignorance
which formed the average Englishman's
mental equipment about America. The
tragedy lay in the fnct that they didn't
want to know anything about America.
"What hnvc they done, anyhow, except
brag?" demanded the chief engineer of a
transport. "They have never originated
anything that I ever heard of."
I instanced the telephone, the Bnnp-shut-ter
camera, the airplane, the submarine
nnd tho gramophone. It was no use
Strange ns it seems when written dowu,
that chief engineer could not see any flaw
in his argument.
"I mean politically," he retorted wood
enly; "we've built up a great empire. What
have the Americans done in the last hun
dred years except whip Spain?"
I mentioned the Louisiana Purchase ns nn
instance of what might be called some ter
ritorial enterprise, but I realized even as
I did so tho cxtieme unfairness of such a
remark. Not one Englishman in, 10,000 has
ever heard of that transaction. The purser,
who was listening, assumed an expression of
mulish contempt and remarked :
"Well, nnd what'; Louisiana anyway?"
And this was the view of the principnl
accountant officer on board n big liner sail
ing out of Liverpool!
WELL, I gave it up ot last. It humili
ated me to lethargy. I gave it up.
When I was loudly assured that America
kept out of the war because she was scared
of England I held my tongue. When I was
reminded that the Venezuelan question wns
the reason America remained neutral I lay
low. When. I wns nsKed why America
didn't walk into Mexico aud conquer it if
she 'was so anxious to fight I declined to be
drawn. Een when America came into the
war I knew better than to show any jubi
lation. The Kuglish chnrnctcr is something like
elm wood in grain, very tough, very
curly and liable to split open in unex
pected directions. It won't' do to hurry
when jou nrc working on it. The average
Englishman, when he found all his previous
prognostications falsified by America coming
iuto flic war, coolly moved back to a fresh
line of trenches and prophesied that "they
would neer get over." When they began
to get oer he moved back again and de
cided that they wouldn't fight, but would
btay round in base ports, and so on aud
so forth. There was no real racial malice
in all this, mind. It was simply the, subtle
poison of cnrs of foolish misunderstanding
working out of the system. It is still work
ing out. What we have to watch now Is
that the irresponsibles of both nations arc
not permitted to inject any fresh virus o
suspicion.
BUT while Englishmen who know Amer
ica have a duty to perform for the bene
fit of humanity thero is nnothcr aspect of the
question which appeals more to the Ameri
can publicist. I mean the conception which
the average stay-at-home Englishman has
of everyday American life. He is hardly to
be blamed for declining to take Americans
seriously when the big film corporations
flood the market with stupid and preposter- ,
otis reels of so-called "college" and "wild
West" life.
The main feature of American life clubs,
exchanges, the libraries, the common access
to sports nnd pastimes which In England
nrc the jealously guarded prerogatives of
the rich none of these come across In the
films which are shipped every week to Eng
land. It is not enough to say that this sort of
thing is to be sought in books. English
people 'of the stay-at-home sort will not
read American books. They will not even
read Welsh or Irish books if they are true
to Welsh and Irish life.
ANOTHER suggestion for the American
Js to overhaul the news agencies. All
my life the staple news received in London
from America has Deen tall stories of giant
floods, giant fires, giant earthquakes, giant
railroad accidents and giant trees. Now
these are all very interesting, but It tends
to give the stay-at-home Englishman the
impression that his leg is belpg pulled.
What we wont is an exchange of ordinary
lnunnn records and aspirations: the right
men don't get into the news. Aify American
who has lived In England will know what
I mean. What is wonted is a steady stream
of general news to be handled by English
writers to counterbalance the occasional
phenomenal Jiappenlngs nnd create a sound,
theJgiiwl ,-$ Wt Phct'tflijiUtid
ftanc uwuj v. viu"" wujuauM vuwxrulBff
j,MUU .-MU, Iri ' 1 i-"! j
TUESDAY, ftL&y; W
v. , I "Be
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: V . PEACE TERKlS;
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THE CHAFFING DISH
Advertisements We Yearn For
T FEEL that I simply must tell you my
- great secret. I can't keep it in any
longer.
My wife and I had aftcn talked the prob
lem over at borne. The gist of the matter
was that I was making no headway in busi
ness because I couldn't bcem to get time
to concentrate on my work. As Joan said
to me, 'i,You know, Bobby, the trouble with
jou is you're too popular. You have too
much magnetism. Everybody likes you so
much they simply won't leave you alone."
MUCH as I hated' to, admit it I knew it
was true. It had troubled me for a,
long time. Every morning when I was
trying to get through the accumulated work
on my desk the telephone would keep buzzing
chaps who wanted me to go out to lunch
with them. Big business nfeti insisted on
my going to the Terrapin Club with them,
and would sit around for a couple of hours
just swapping yarns while I ached to get
back to the office. The president of our
company would calt mo into bis private of
fice for a chat over business matfers, and
though I used to try hard to break away be
would keep me there an hour or so just lis
tening to my ideas 6'n how things ought to be
run. Stenographers were all fighting to take
my dictation. The result was that my letters
were late getting done. Influential men who
happened to bo passing through the city
would pick on me and insist ou seeing me.
My w'ork was neglected CYeryduy.
I USED to have to take a portfolio of
papers home every night. Even there it
wns no better. Joan and I would settle
down for a quiet evenina, she with her sew
ing and I with my work. But we kept on
being interrupted. Some of the most promi
nent people in the city were always drop
ping in to pass away a merry evening, to
hear my views on the league of nations or
something of thnt sort. Orthey would ask
us out to dinner, and we didn't like to re
fuse. "It's nil your damned tavolrj fairc,"
.loan would say dcspulrlngly. "Mrs. Kitz
Carlton says she simply has to have us thero
every time she entertains, you are so well
read and give nil. her guests new ideas on
art, politics and philosophy. Isn't there
anything you can do about it, Bobby? We'll
be ruined if this goes on."
SHE was quite right. We were on the
high road to dismal failure. Everybody
in the office liked me so mhch 'that every
time a particularly difficult contract had to
be put over It was wished on me. I learned
that it's always the popular guy that gets
the tough jobs handed to him. My desk was
a kind of social center. Visitors to the of
fice would refuse o leave until they bad
been introduced to me. I never got n chanre
to be nlone for a minute. How I envied
little Peters, the awkward, brusque book
keeper, whom everybody hated,. Nobody
ever interrupted him or pestered blra to go
out to lunch at 12 o'clock or play a round
of golf with the president of, the steel trust
whence wanted to get a Job finished.
One day I took Inters aside. "Look here,
old man," I said, k'tell me how you do It?"
I hardly expected him to tell me, but be was'"
mighty decent.
What Peters told' me was a revelation. I
felt like a new man and put it Into practice
nt once. Of course It took time, but I felt
the urge and the will to succeed, Within a
month I was getting results.
HOWJiappy I am now I
sense, of power I havet
What an added
What a glorl-
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Prominent men who used to pursue me all
over town now pass me by on the street
with ouly a curt nod. Some of the very
best people have actually gone out of their
wny to avoid me. The hend of the firm
hasn't called me into his private office for
three months. And Joan and I have our
evenings all to ourselves. I no longer have
to send three dress shirts to the laundry
every week on account of Mrs. Fitz-Carl-tou's
dinner parties. The president of the
country club has stopped talking about put
ting me up for membership. Thank heaven,
I won't have to buy a hunch of golf tools.
I can buy some clothes for the children in
stead. Whcu there's nil impossibly hard
job on band at the office they pass it over
to one of the other boys and let him fall
down qn it instead of me. I have a chance
to go ahead with my own work and make
good. I'm going to be a success. I feel it!
And it's all due to Peters aud what he told
me.
But you want to know how it's done.
Well, what Peters told me that day wns
"Get a copy of Doctor Bunko's The Secret
of Making People Hate You."
IT'S wonderful! That littlo book tells you
how to demagnetize yourself. If you're
jeursed with a genial disposition, ns I was,
jou can leurn how to bo tactless and dis
agreeable in ten lessons. Ten more lessons
will fell you how never to remember n uiaus
name or face or telephone number. You
can niako your dearest friend n complete"
stranger after reading three ot Doctiir
Bunko's chapters. After reading this epoch
making little book ou will never be well
informed on artistic, literary, political -and
educational topics. No longer will com
plete strangers in a Pullman smoker- insist
on drawing you into conversation In older
to bear your views.
Such confidence have tho publishers in
old Do,ctor Bunko's book thnt they will
gladly send it to you on approval. Send
no money. Don't even stump the envelopu
if you don't happen to have a stamp in your
wallet. Just get the book anyway nnd leurn
how to help yourself the way I've been
helped. Be disagreeable and have a littlo
time to yourself!
Temperance Fugitl
You cannot throw oft the habits of so
ciety Immediately any moro than you can
throw off the habits of the Individual Im
mediately, They must be slowly got rid of j
or, rather, they must be slowly altered.
They must be Blowly adapted ; they must be
slowly shaped to the new ends for which
we would use them. That Is the process of
law, If law Is Intelligently conceived.
President Wilson, In a speech In Pirls.
How much more intelligently conceived
the eighteenth amendment would have been
if it had provided for a progressive do
mobilization of the G. A, It. Grand Army
of Itumhounds. From July 1 to Ifi five
cocktail men should, be reduced to four per
day ; from July IB to 20, three per dav :
from July 20 to 25, two per day, plus a
compulsory glass of raspberry Boda or some
other barmeclde beverage. In this way tho
decantcrbury pilgrimage might be made easy
and the world would be safe for abstainers.
Deck Mottoes
Thieves respect property. They merely
wish the property to become their property
that they may aore perfectly respect It.
G, K. CHESTERTON.
'What is it that one finds In tobacco tins
nowadays? Not tobacco, surely. We
haven't whiffed a pipeful in two years that
tastes like real weed except lmportdBilx-
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The Looher-On Pays, Too
THEY danced unto his veering tunes,
For some were trist as well as gladi
They danced, they danced unto bis tunes
It seemed to me thnt all were mad !
Through summer noons, 'iicatb summer
v moons,
They danced, they danced unto bis tunes!
They never asked him whence life came
(Oh, Joie-de-vivre, in motley coat,
And cap with feather like a flame
Upon the fanning air afloat!)
They never even asked his name;
I could but guess 'it nil the same.
I sat, hands folded iu my lap.
"Soon must they pay who dauce," I said.
Off came die plumed and jaunty cap
The piper wore upon bis head.
"They never thought of this, mayhap!"
The coins dropped ringing in the cop.
It passed nlong with plume of flame'
The coin a jingling music made ;
None did dispute the piper's claim,
And some there were that overpaid.
But then, just then, to me he came,
And swung that cap with plume of flame!
"I did not dance!" "Still, you must pay
You liked, my tunes!" "Sonio were too
sad!1'
The piper Inughed : "Another way,
A way you liavo, of being glad!"
'Tuns true! I had no more to say;
The looker -on must also pay!
Edith M. Thomas, in the New York Times.
What Do You Knoiv?
QUIZ
What is the capital of Finland?
How long is a kilometer in English
measurements?
At whnt two towns in the Azores Islands
will the American transatlantic avl-
ntors call?
Wlult is the 'correct pronunciation of
the word route?
What is a sobriquet?
What is a "contretemps"?
Who was Zenobia and where did she
live? . f
What presidents of the United States
. were graduates of Harvard College?
What kind of weather may be foretold
when spiders spin on the grass?
Who is Secretary of Agriculture?
8.
0.
10.
Answers to Yesterday's Quiz
1. Roland Morris, of Philadelphia, Is
American ambassador to Japan,
2. To "burke" means to dispose of quietly;
to suppress, or-smother. Named after
William Burke, who was executed in
Edinburgh in 1829. He murdered his
victims by suffocation
3. The Greek parliament is called the boubj
(pronounced "boo-lay"),
4. NC-4 means "Navy-Curtis-4.
5. Avignon, France, was the Beat of th
papacy from 130D until 1377.
0. A mezzaninB floor is a lovy story between
'tjvvo high ones, espeelnlly between the
ground floor and the story above.
7. Julius Caesar was assassinated In 44
,B. C.
8. Laurence Sterne wrote the "Seutimeu-
tal Journey.'
jsfc &r C2S
XT mil,.
Of Slmouy is the buying or selling 'of ec- ,1
cleslastical preferment, c ! ?J
JO.
Andrew .Taekson, James K, Polk Sfr
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