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rbiUdtlphii, Mondir, April 7, 1919
. THE GOVERNOR'S COAL PLAN
T"VRT.1VF.PV nf r.nl in n r-itv llkp Phlla-
v$y - -- delnhia is a complicated nnd e-
55 iTiensivo nrocess. as every conl man
, 'knows. A coal maiket such as Governor
Wf' ' Sproul has suggested will hardly seem
M opractical to distributors ot experience,
fc since coal cannot be cariicd home like
"$ vegetables or ice or nny of the other
&. commodities retailed direct in recent
'$ years from cential points for the sake of
economy.
Unless Mr. Sproul can evolve a plan of
delivery better than coal retailers have
been able to devise with their elaborate
rfiffoni'fof ifttio ntirl inrjnv fhn cfimllllKI nf
kl-. t MAtiafnnf vyAAinr 1... iVm Tl.Vill. nml
a4'r hviuwiih jiivuuiii uj bt.v .uk... ....u
K'boards of investigators, his suggestion
gj ,ior a great central coal market must be
dismissed as useless.
tSM Respite the Governors decision to dis
i expense with a coal inquiry and admit the
rieht of dealers to raise prices once
Ez-jSgain, there will remain in the mind of
si, the 'general public an lriitating sense of
(& injustice. Mr. Sproul might have been
kS- 'Wiser had he annointed his commission.
Srii-V demanded a thorough inquiry and a
32 r thorough reDort and left the ultimate
Jefwfdecision with exrjerts Qualified to reveal
Ks&faults in the coal-distribution system
Jjlgarid make suggestions for improcment.
we-p -
W$ OH, BILL!
ggLTTOUR P0lite. or parlor, Bolshevist is
B$j frankly a person who luxuriates in
jruie Bouna oi nis own oice. ne wouiu uc
& shocked if vou weie to take him se-
jEjSfriously. From the impolite Bolshevist
Ejgpsone must expect better things. But life,
KX,jUter- all, is merely an endless process
taot Qismusionment.
Vl J3? rTn0rn ie TllfT THU TToxTmrw4 fn nvam-
fMple, fiery advocate of the hard and simple
jli&ijjife, professional proletarian, singer of
&jhater of all that is effete and gilded and
S&! Co'stly in modern life, preacher of the
JlH'equality of man.
Egjsb' ' Vhen Big Bill breezed into town last
"1 RVeek- he was incognito and, therefore,
ISEJriof in character. He was not nourished.
vfor( the time being, by the emanations of
STiiMia' Bllirit Tint ,raf Vi fliA enenran., V. n
5$,8andwich and the coffee in a mug as
Kjjjfleavvy.as a tombstone which give him
BtMgth and vitality in his hour& with
KS&,"W the Ritz!" nuoth this Rill to hi
lLl..lL.. A. .J .' l, ,. ,
QtjBaaxicaDuv. Anu io ine iirz in wpnr
rtwith several disciples, also incognito and
M'fiajko out of character, there to feed in
SVaHi atmosphere of silver fincer bowls.
ni flowers, and glimmering napery, and
&ierential to the point of tears.
p?$f$Such is life! One cannot but wonder
Ef'iaMinfr trip linrnv-linnflnrl fnlL- nm.ilrl V.n.,n
td if they could have seen their Bill
tefltfeenf What would the Oppressed have
? Jj"j.el- ,all . l
KjfJ iney couia nave seen tne pennies
fW11"11641 from their toil being lavished
jjftyen uiosc luxuries ana superfluities
K'Vrhich ft is Big Bill's mission to deride
!4wm hfe soap box?
s$J11, Bill! Is this the way it works,
f'KlSttep all?
tSfiV-M. , rm - J!i i;r i ..
KwP- - r Taalcal me naa us seamy side,
"Wjtoo," apparently. But it is a great life
tjklorl the little fellows if they don't
feV.Dni I V UlaMTC A nrjnirm
-wjri ws.a.i iininu n unnv,M;K:
fEW ZEALAND is troubled with a
pest of parrots which are killing
8ep on the ranges.
&..K?The 'northern hemisphere is nlsn trim.
-1 bed yiOi a pest of parrots. Not the
'birds 'fohdlv adored bv mnldpn Inio. r
Wf Uncertain age who want some one to
vrt appreciate tnem and talk to them, but
. i oertam trousered parrots who are doing
, Hnslr best to talk the league of nations to
"' tffetk,
i " - "--- --..,,, oja me uiru,
H3w:n snneKs bl me top or its voice
tp41y doesn't want a league," say the
rea parrots, -it may make us do
iUnp; we don't want to do! Rava
, erelgnty"
,K,t, u r
.SALOON SUBSTITUTES
Bishop Charles E. Woodcock,
c the Episcopal diocese of Ken-
flatly demanded in this city some
n suggestion from the anti-saloon
I relative to their notion of a saloon
lie ho approached nearer to the
ctMM rf the liquor question than most of
ir Barleycorn's enemies have dared
i altogether wrong to suppose that
have, thrived because of csaen-
'perversfty or a desire on the
Billions of ''men. to go to the
l tiiMwiioMiwe route.
, ' t' 'rfV- V
tot.'.. .. ' V-K.! "
Wherever tho liquor question has been
Intelligently studied it has been demon
strated that barrooms are crowded by
men with an uncdnscious desire for re
lief from the endless routine of their
working days and a desire for good-fellowship
and warmth, which, If It is not
genuine In the saloons, Is at least
cleverly simulated.
Tho liquor Interests long ago recog
nized In the movies a menace to their
business. Wherever the means for nor
mal recreation have been provided tho
saloons have suffered. When the nation
finally becomes dry the need for relaxa
tion upon which much of tho saloon's
prosperity was founded must bo met in
one way or another. And until some
way Is found to give men an opportunity
to meet In their talkative hours and
satisfy their hunger for normal compan
ionship tho work of the anti-saloon
forces will be only half done.
A PLAN TO END
GOVERNMENT BY FAVOR
The General Assembly Is Expected to
Put State Aid to Private Charities
on a Business Basis
IT IS easier to protest against govern
ment by favoritism than to abolish it.
No one defends it. Those who govern
us simply practice it.
No graver scandal has grown out of
it than that which disgraces the system
of distributing public money to private
charitable institutions.
For more than thirty years the Board
of Public Charities has been protesting
against the injustice of the system.
Eighteen years ago it said in its annual
leport that some law should be passed
which would insure that "the aid granted
should be distributed without discrimi
nation to the institutions" entitled to it.
The governors in recent years have
urged upon the General Assembly the
passage of laws which would remove the
abuses.
It is admitted on every hand that the
state funds have been used to reward in
stitutions the managers of which worked
with the politicians and that the threat
of withholding state funds has been used
as r club to keep other managers in
line. "Work with us and we will give
you largess from the public treasury,"
the politicians have said in effect. "Op
pose us and we will cut oft the funds
which are necessary for the conduct of
the institutions in which you aie inter
ested." Unfortunately, the privately managed
charities are not the only institutions
which have been blackmailed in this
damnable manner.
The General Assembly has before it a
bill which is intended to put an end to
tho abuse, so far as the private charities
are concerned. It is in the hands of the
judiciary general committee, which will
hear arguments in its support in Har
risburg tomorrow afternoon The bill
may need some' revision before it is re
ported out of the committee for final
passage, but its purposes are so sound
and defensible that it is .'ifflcult to
imagine any valid argument against
tl-crr..
The measure, known as House bill No.
798, is based on the theory that state aid
to private institutions taking care of the
dependent poor should be extended as a
right and not as a favor. The private
institutions supplement the public insti
tutions and take care of those for whom
there is no room in the institutions main
tained wholly by public funds.
The bill provides that a minimum
standard of equipment and treatment
shall be fixed for all private agencies
caring for the poor and a minimum stand
ard of payment for services rendered;
that the private agencies shall be ar
ranged in classes by the Board of Public
Charities according to the kind of serv
ice rendered and the necessary cost of
such service, and that all institutions
shall be subject to inspection by the
agents of the board. State aid is to be
granted only to such agencies as attain
to the minimum standard, and every
agency which meets the tests is to re
ceive "the aid as a matter of right. The
amount that it is to receive is to bo
based upon the amount of service that
it renders, ascertained through quarterly
reports showing the number of depen
dent poor cared for in that period and
the cost of such care to the institution.
The sum paid is to be sixty per cent of
the cost of the service, and this money
is to be taken from the biennial appro
priation, one-eighth part of which is to
be distributed each quarter.
It is assumed that if the demands for
money exceed the amount available the
sum that can be used is to be appor
tioned pro rata among the institutions.
This, however, is not made clear in the
bill. It is likely that the committee will
put a definite provision to this effect in
the measure before reporting it.
The scheme devised here is the same
as that which governs appropriations for
education and for the care of the indigent
insane in the state hospitals that is, it
is based on the number of persons bene
fited by the appropriations.
The disregard of this equitable rule
has created grave abuses. Some pri
vate institutions, favored by the politi
cians, have received 140 per cent of the
cost of tho service rendered to the poor,
while others have had to be content with
only 20 per cent of the money they have
spent in caring for persons who are
properly a public charge. Still further,
there has been just as unfair a distribu
tion of public money among the differ
ent sections of the state as among the
different institutions. Five counties awith
40 per cent of the population have re
ceived nearly 70 per cent of the appro
priation and seventeen counties havo re
ceived nothing. As already noted, the
proposed plan will insure that every In
stitution which passes the tests of the
Board of Public Charities will receive
its equitable share of the public money,
and will receive it automatically with
out havins to beseech, the General As-
sembly every two years for that to which
it ! entitled as a right.
Tho need for refoim Is admitted. All
that is required now is ,that tho mem
bers of tho General Assembly shall act,
The bill under consideration may not bo
perfect. Its defects can be readily cured.
When It Is put In proper shape Its unani
mous passage would .do credit to every
man who voted for It.
If there Is any opposition at the hear
ing In Harrisburg tomorrow, those who
have faith in the epirit of fair play
among the people of tho state will be
grievously disappointed. Tho reform has
been delayed too long already.
THE ERA OF HIGH TAXES
'T'HE national government for years to
come will have to collect annually
about four times as much levenue as tho
maximum raised In any twelve months
prior to the war.
This means that federal taxation will
be four times as high in the future as It
has been in the prewar past.
Representative Good, who will be
chairman of tho committee of appropria
tions of the new Hoiise, is teminding U3
that the intoiest on th" war debt of
$24 000,000,000 will amount to $1,050,
000,000 a yrar; that the appropriations
for the ordinary expenditures of the gov
ernment will amount to $1,650,000,000,
and that it will take more than $2,00fl,
000,000 to support an army of 250,000
men.
Whero is all this money comint from 7
That is the ouestion whM) Conpress
must answer. It will tax the financial
statesmanship of the ablest minds in
Congress to devise revenue measures
which will produce the money without
(icslioying business. But at the best the
nation is confronted by the certainty of
high taxes.
There is no reason for pessimism,
however, for the country is in a better
condition to carry its present buidens
than it was to carry the Civil War bur
dpn in 1865.
The Civil War debt amounted to $76
per capita of the population, and the
national wealth amounted to $600 per
capita; 'or the national wealth was a
little less than eight times as big as the
debt.
The present war debt amounts to $240
per capita and the national wealth $2400,
or the wealth is ten times as great as the
debt.
Proportionately to our wealth, our
present burdens are lighter than those
which our fathers were called upon to
bear after the Civil War. We know a
great deal more about financing than
they did. So, although the taxes may be
high, we have the money to pay them.
THE TIGER'S OLD .COAT
pLEVER French bushelmen "stop-
peurs" is their official title have
plugged up the bullet holes in Georges
Clemenceau's overcoat and the Premier
is congratulating himself that he will not
have to buy a new one. In America a
garment similarly perforated would have
been thrown away. The "Tiger" never
for a moment considered that policy,
thereby emphasizing a French trait big
with hopeful significance.
Gallic genius in the art of reparation
is indefatigable. It has saved the nation
again and again, notably after the Na
poleonic downfall and after the Franco
Prussian War. It will triumph again
even though the indemnity from Ger
many may be a billion or so les3 than
has been sought and even if the tricolor
should not wave over Saarlouis.
Wasteful Americans will not only envy
M. Clemenceau his perfectly good coat,
with its invisible patch, but they will
soon be marveling at the material re
demption of France by the French them
selves. The story always works out that
way. Bismarck was awed and chagrined
at it. Our mood will as usual be one of
admiration, if the course of history1 runs
true to form.
It has remained for
Something New the Rev. Dr. Newell
Eery Day Dwlght HIllls to
ovolvo the most pic
turesque charge yet made against the
"Wilson administration. Doctor Hlllla feels
ngsured that because tho federal authori
ties did not restrain Trotsky when he pre
pared to leave this country for Russia,
President "Wilton is responsible for the
Czar's downfall and the overthrow of the
Russian government. He neglects to sug
gest, however, that there must have been
something profoundly rotten In a govern
ment that could ba overthrown by a sec
ond rale agitator.
The GormanB, sayB
Unquestionably Ludendorff in his
latest book, aban
doned all hope of victory last August.
And yet they continued to send their men
to slaughter. Surely, if Ludendorff is read
in Germany he will find it necessary to
reside somewhere else.
Reports from the
The New Version dry regions in the
south show that the
time has come yhen some master of color
ful Action may easily make a fortune by
writing a book that might be, called "Ten
Nights in a Hair-Oil Factory."
The Reds in Ger
Colors of History "nany and in Russia
might be a little
more popular if they were not proving to
be yellow fighters.
Excitable Italy is atlll "Fiuming" at
the Peace Conference.
It is a dismal paradox that May coal
prices wllUbe inseparable from the must
rate.
Cardlnai'Mercier in the flesh will soon
make his, first visit to America. His soul,
however, preceded him here by nearly five
years.
When the air routes become regu
lated and policed It wilt at least be im
possible to roast the traffic cop for stand
ing still and doing nothing.
The Infjrence that General Blanquefa
projected and elaborately press-agented
revolution In Mexico in not unconnected
with oil wells helps to confirm the belief
I that Ijo a l!pjW pustower.
MAKINGJHE MOST OF
THE SCHUYLKILL'S'CHARMS
There Is Notable Precedent for the
Falrmount Park Art Association's
Plan In the Accomplishment,'
, -r ,-u . .. fit Other.Qltles ,, , ,
IT la, nn"cmbArrassment to city beautllWe
that a rher has two banks. That fact, In
nature enormously Increases the magnitude
of the Falrmount Park Art Association's war
commemoration plan to make a flulal
memorial out of the Schujlklll from League
Island to Valley Forge, as it Is also
responsible for the preponderance of lake
side, seaside and bayslde over riverside Im-,
proxements In great cities throughout the
world. There are exceptions, pf fcourse,
notably In Paris, but as a rule U istho sea
drho or lako, front which Is thesWy'spot,
of many modem municipalities., ,
A Schujlklll of one-sided lowliness would
be, ' and In places It Is today. Incompletely
decoratixe From wateru orks .to the '"Falls,"
the right bank of the streamv!n addition to
Ub original natural charms, presents ylth
a few exceptions a neat and orderly aspect
The roadway la well kept, the park grass
receives' adequate attention, the river em
bankmehts are, saxe for a' few "stretches, in
good condition. ' '
On the summer days the regrettably ln
trURlp, railroad, is fairly tffeothely hidden
by fine old trees and hills In leafless times
the ornate and blatant structures at "Brew
ery Town" ofrend the xlslon turned east of
tho Lincoln statue. It remains to be seen
whether bone-dryness will have nny effect on
architectural reform
THU opposite bank, howeer, from the
Spring Garden street to the Qlrord
aenuo bridge presents much moret serious
disfigurements Tho railroad Is In disen
chanting ,eIdence, especially the elevated
freight line, continually crowded with noisy
traffic It Is true that grass has been planted
on both the artificial and natural acclivities,
but locomothe smoke casts a heavy pall over
the scene, and although a drhjfway has been
made close to the rIVcr's edge, the cWce of
cinder paving for the roadbed Is hardly pro
ductle of artistic allurement Indeed, tho
entrance to the West Tark drhe. Imme
diately below the laduct portion of the
Spring Garden street bridge, is about the
shabbiest Intioductlon conceivable to one of
the foremost of the worltls municipal
pleasure grounds
Conditions arc bettered above GIrard ae
nue Memorial and Horticultural Halls grace
tho high ground on the left bank, and the
Pennsylvania Railroad has made Its exit
from the Park On the right side the Colo
nial mansions. Including the gem of Clive
den, crowning miniature mountains, and the
many evidences of careful park superin
tendence, coupled with the lavish outlay of
natural beauties, render the Schuylkill en
vironment as far as the "Falls" well worthy
to beepme the nucleus of a suitable war
memorial Improvement.
The spene also suggests the vast propor
tions the proposed undertaking, which aim
not only at the artistic "redemption" of the
Schuylkill through the stockyard dump heap,
rotting wharf and generally slimy stretches
between the Falrmount dam nnd League
Island, but also north of the "Falls," whero
romantic scenery abounds, but where Indus
tilal Intrusions along the banks so often mar
tho picture.
The whole scheme Is little Bhort of monu
mental, but that Is no reason why the Idea
should be merely patronizingly dismissed
Other states and cltleB have embraced adorn
ment enterprises of great scales 'Even the
partial completion of, a worthy undertaking
Is better than nothing done The redemption
of, say, ten miles of tho Schuylkill would be
a fine thing, strengthening hope In the ulti
mate fruition of the whole proposal.
THn model "lmproed" rher of the world
Is perhaps the Seine. "From the Pont
d'Austerlltz to Fassy It flows between neat
stone embankments, inevitably the right sort
for a city, It Is spanned by graceful bridges,
its quals are usually spacious, appropriately
mindful of both commercial and artistic exi
gencies, and at times, particularly at the
Cour la Reine and Champs Elysees reaches,
they are green and tree-decked
Beyond Passy, even In art-loving Paris,
degeneration sets In. The two banks are not
always equally attractive. St. Cloud is charm
ing, but the view toward the city proper has,
in parts, a suggestion of the Schuylkill
lapses
Doubtless the new Paris that must come
with a reconstructed world will Inaugurate
reforms, and the whole Serpentine course to
St. Germain may bo eye-gladdening There
-would be slim chance of that result had not
an inspiring beginning been made
London, provides a specimen of one-sided
riparian betterments. The Thames embank
ment, though not long, Is a masterpiece of
Its kind The "Surrey side," with Its pickle
factories, Is, however, decidedly unbeautlful.
It is beyond the city proper that the really
parklike Thames begins The Schuylkill
"decorators" could learn a great deal from
that Ingratiating scene. Lyons, of prime im
portance Industrially, has done well with
the muddy Rhone and the pellucid Same,
which rneet within her llmlti. Seville,
on a comparatively 'sYpall scale, has accom
plished much with the yellow Guadalquivir,
subordinating tne railways picioriany ana
emphasizing parklike adornment tn "Los
Dellclas" that animated pleasure ground
Justifying Us musical and seductive name.
EUT it Is when municipal embellishment
la relieved from concerning itself with
both banks of a body of water that some of
the most striking Improvements flourish.
American cities are entitled to an honorable
position in such work, and nowhere more
than on the Great Lakes, along the shores of
which Chicago, with Us Michigan avenue;
Cleveland, with Us municipal building area,
and Milwaukee, with Its boulevards, have
accomplished wonders. Along the Gulf the
Galveston sea-wait drlo, ot bourse, deserves
first mention.
Abroad, handsome waterside parkways and
boulevards are legion, and at no place Is -the
municipal performance more striking
than in Rio. Among cities of the globe, the,
capital of Brazil quite takes the palm for
splendor of natural environment. The great
bay of the "River of January," flanked by
the fantastic Carloca mountains and the more
distant j,Organ range. Is of almost unbeliev
able tropla beauty. , ,
But for yeara the metropolis on Its sh'ores
crowded, on, a narrow ledge and huddled
betweenhuge hills. The breathing space so
Imperatively needed, was achieved In whole
sale fashion. Some of the- mountains were
actually removed. Others were fitted into a
most elaborate scheme oft embellishment.
Most effective ' aJ1 a superb boulevard,
the Avenlda .Belra Mar, was constructed for
more than tour miles along the Botofogo arm
of the wonderful bay. In point of, scenic at
traction. It is perhaps the grandest of all
municipal parkways.
Scores of lesser accomplishments,' many
of them bearing highly distinctive names,
should fill the SchuylkJlU beautifies with
hope. Havana has her MaJecon, facing Morro
CastleS Manila, her celebrated Luneta
the little moon which follows an arc In
Manila Bay-, Cadiz, her tasteful Alameda
de Apoaaca. looking toward the Atlantic;
Syracuse, 'Sicily, her Marina, on the calm
Ionian Sea. I '
Indeed, there are plenty of splrlt-fortlfylng
examples., of largely planned municipal im
provements to cheer thp Schuylkill "renova.
tors." Realization of'.the entire dream may
not come. But It should at least, be stimu
lating to- Phlladelphlans who hold tbe
"Hidden River" fondly in their affections to
admit tho.'V'OU&m; ot aaorning j-
t-l "v vrn, .
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PRUNES AND PRISMS
If the League of Nations
Were a Restaurant Syndicate
OVER one billion people ore spending their
lives on this earth such is the lure of
this admirably planned pip net.
ONE IULMOX bon vh ants lovers of life
and its good things! Think of 'it!
TO HAVE nnd to hold such colossal patron
ago we must exercise careful regard for
the nicotics of human intercourse. Wc
must give these patrons service; they
must be sold on the attractions of menu or
they would go somewhere else. '
THESE vlvants, whether bon or tnal, are
rightly fastidious as td the kind of life
they live. They like to take it pleasantly,
to linger over it, unhurried.
THE principle of The League of Nations
cuisine is to handle life in a strictly sani
tary manner, with rcllncd service and
wholesome attention to the amenities. We
do not throw life on tho table and say,
"Take it or leae it."
OUIt carefully planned sjstcm satisfies this
unique clientele.
A New York paper is conducting a con
troversy on the old bicker about doughnuts
and crullers. Our Idea is that the ring
shaped sinker is the only tuic doughnut,
and that the cruller is the form of ballast
that comes twisted rather like a well, a
corkscrew, if you remember what they
looked like. To our way of thinking this
truthlis indicated in the name cruller, which
is simply a popular perversion of tbe word
"curler." What the learned professors c'ajl
"metathesis."
Sylvan Night
THE lonely woods aro carpeted with
needles inches deep;
A blazing knot sends fragrant incenso
curling to the sky ;
Afar, an owl cries; nearer still, my horse,
disturbed in sleep.
Breaks in upon my reverie withgentle,
plaintive neigh.
I answer to his nickering.
The fire sends shadows flickering
Upon the ghost-white of my tent. The
owl repeats his cry.
THE wjnd, with wistful slghlngs, rustles
through the lofty pines;
It brings a note of chillncss, and I nestle
to my blaze;
Above, the stars are twinkling like fresh
gems still in the mines
But mirrored in my thoughts are other
nights and other days.
We all are prone to pondering ;
My inner thoughts are wandering
To other scenes, to other climes, to other
folks and ways.
MY CAMPFIRE dies; the embers glow;
now silence reigns supreme;
The jcrcaturcs of the night are still ; my
pipe has long been dead !
The whIp-poor-wlU has ceased bis call; I
rouse from out my dream,
And', spreading blankets in my tent, I
tumble into bed. .
Tho moonlight now is shimmering;
I think of days gone glimmering,
While thoughts of;. home are upmost in
my retrospectlye head.
SOMEWHERE yonder, trees are mourn
ing over days and times gone by, '
Telling secrets' of the ages to the placid
waters deep
Of the lake, on which they border ; they are
restless so am I
Aa I think of scenes and places that 'I
once had held so cheap.
My thoughts have gone meandering
On days I spent philandering;
Until Mother Nature) lulls me with her
panacea, Sleep.
ROBERT J,. BELI,EM.
The Caloric Value of Plump Urchins
"It had been a-strenuous plght. All day
the mercury hod bceu flirting with the zero
mark and soon after sunset burrowed down
into the bulb below all rcadlucs. Mr heA
that night felt llkn a well-Jced tomb. Prop.-
the -i vjb f
f,' : - ' A V, -$
i i x
to death if it had not been for a saving Idea.
Hurrjing into the children's room I selected
two of the warmest and chubbiest. Banking
them on cither side of me in my bed, I Just
survived the night. Of course, it was hard
on them, but then any round, warm child of
proper sentiments should welcome an oppor
tuntiy to save the life of nn aged parent."
Sam Scoville, Jr., In theYale Review.
Those who went to the Academy the other
evening to hear the Afro-American singers
were startled to sec "The Battered Bride"
mentioned on the program. It ought to be
"The Bartered Bride," which is better, be
cause if a bride is popular enough tor te the
subject ot barter she w ill probably be' kindly
treated.
The man whose name we covet is Major
General Beaumont Bonaparte Buck. A he
is a West Pointer, he never had the satis
faction of working his way up from a Buck
private.
Our Postman
They signed the pence his boy was safe at
last,
He sighed relief for all the danger past,
Then waited hopeful, but no letter came.
He trudged upon his endless rounds, the
same
Old smile ns in his sack he bpre
Good news from France to ench familiar
door.
His son was near Sedan, that much he knew,
But still no letter and the doubting grew.
Always courageous on his plodding way
He went, hope ebbing slowly day by day, ,
No word for weeks then a short blessed
cable :
"Am wounded, Dad; will write as soon as
able."
"Mother and I will have him home again,"
Ho beams. "Of course, I worry now and
then,
But oh the change!' Why, lately it's a Joy
Giving you folks tbe letters from your boy.
I used to smile so that you shouldn't see '
The patn those soldier letters gave to me."
PHOEBE HOFFMAN.
How to Know Satan When You Meet
Him
H. G. Wells imparts some advance infor
mation that may be ot value to some of us :
"Satan has the compact alertness of
habitual travel ; be is as definite as a grip
sack, and be brings a flavor of initiative and
even bustle upon a scene that would other
wise be one of serene perfection. His halo
even has a slightly traveled look. He has
been going to and fro in the earth and
walking up and down in it; his labels are
still upon him., He believes that he is a
necessary accessory to God and, that his
incalculably quality Is -an indispensable re.
Uef to the acquiescence of th&,archangeils.",
Mr., Welts goes opj through a" Mongnnd
very' polysyllablo phllQsophlcatlontq express
the thought, that Samuel Dittler,, sa,ld long
ago intone sentence: "Vice exists to keep
Virtue iwjthfn boundb."- '
f ' '.
i
At leastthe kaiser has attained tno of
bis cherished alms, for his soul is said! to
have turhed-;into Gaul and wormwood. Tho
latter, we recall (never mind how), is one
of the ingredients pf absinthe, whch is also
said to make the heart grow fonder and the
brain goiwandcr
Wo'pder what McAdoo'a doing these days?
Max UArden, the well-known German
blurtcr of'.Unpleasant truths, x quoted by
the New York Sun ah having said that the
kaiser was inflamed with a passion "for
gauzo and effects"." Is that simply a Ger
man guttural that g6t mislaid on the cable,
or dors It refer to the kaiser ns impresario
of 'the ballet at the Berlin court theatre
For tbe moment and under Admiral Doc
tor Grayson, the supreme council of ten has
become a council of quinine.
Colobel House keeps on saying nothing.
but" he aaya It so demurely itl.at we 'can't
y
.Or)
SHARED
SOME things there be that are better
shared
A cottage Are; a table spread;
A country road and the evening hush,
And gardens trelllsed and garlanded,
b
The hunter lies by his forest flame,
Content with his luck and lonely fare-;
But the rosy heahh burns best for Two
And milk and honey are sweet to share.
The dreamer and plorjeer may geek
Tho pathless plain and the distant
hill
But better the light-locked hands of Love,
Where a friendly lane winds green and
still.
And, though the wand'rer by sunward seas
Silently watches the dawn unroll,
Deaiei at dusk are the Twain and shy
Volcds interpreting soul to soul.
Rose bordered ways where tho moon looka
down, '
And jasmine -.vines where her light is
snaied,
Fulfill but half our heart's desire
Gardens are better shared!
Agnes Kendrlck Gray, In the Boston
Transcript.
The "ma rode" will precede tho parade
when the Twenty-eighth comes home, foe
it will 'begin at the gangplank.
If we can believe some sensationalists,
It Is a crime against the peace of the world,
for a Japanese to buy land In Mexico. ,
The tale of how Mr. ,Wll8on, in, Octo
ber, talked directly with Jhe Germans by
wireless, insists that he addressed ,them in
"plain English." ,Yet they seem to have
understood him far better than they did
the Kaiser's native tongue.
What Do1 You Knoiv?
I
quiz '
1. After whom were the Philippine Islands
named?
2. What Is basalt7 ,
3. What ls the meaning ot the word
nescient? " .' K
4. Who wrote "What Will He Do Wth It?"
5. What werethe names of Alexandre Du-
mas's "Three Musketeers"? r
6. "What Is Taoism? ,
7,, Who Is the present French foreign mlh-
lser7 l , "
'8. What Is a comfit? ('
9. What la a consstory? , t . , ,
10. What Is the largest city In Porto Rico
"after San Juan?
Answers to Saturday's Qulx
Ix
A
1 General Ironsides Is the British com1
mahder opposed to the Bolshevists (n
the Murmansk region of Russia'.' .
2. Cairo is the largest city in Egypt.'
i. The Eddas are a collection of'ancleiU
Iceland poems. ,
4. Nacarat color is, a bright orange-red.
5 The sachem vvas the chief of certain
' American Jndlan tribes.. By .exten
sion the word has come to mean blg
Mvlg, eminent person. It Is pronounced
With the "ch" sounded as In church,
with the "a" short, and wjth the ac
cent on the first syllable. t 4
6. MathlSB Enberger Is the head of the.
German armistice commission.
7 Spikenard Is a perennial herb, allied to
valerian. The word Is' also applied to
certain kinds of fragrant oil and
originally It described an ancient postly
aromatlo ointment.
8 The Metropolitan of Athens Is the Greek
'h Church prtlate of that city, ranking
above an archbishop and below i
patriarch;
9. A sacKoiji is nv """"" J hw"ipi ;,
jo' Two Anwlcan presidents, Martin iVati,
Buren and Theodora Roosevelt, wra ot
Vfr'utepfn'M anctwlry, fj ,
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