Evening public ledger. (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, March 24, 1919, Night Extra Closing Stock Prices, Page 10, Image 10

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THE EVENING TELEGRAPH
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rW' I'UULIC LLUlikK tOWPANI
CTRUS 11. K. CURTIS, riEnmiM
r. Charlfs H. Lnalmton. Vice Preaidrntj John U,
" J4rtln. Sx-r.(rr and Trtatursrl Philips. Collins.
,-ofcn B. Williams, John J, Spurcron, Dlrtctora.
ft,
IV.J'.
EDITORIAL HOARD!
Clos If, K. Cum, Chairman
. tAVID . BMIL.Br
V-
.Editor
. tc. :. .
JlN C. MARTfrV....Gnsral Duslnns Manatsr
'Publish,! dallr at PciLld I.trxliea llulldlnr.
-' ,'n tr Indrpandanca Square, rnlladtlphla.
'AtHNTlu Citl Press-tiiton Hulldlne
MflBW 1UHK
106 Metropolitan Towtr
jjrrBoii.
tin lora iiuiijinc
HT. Louu loos Fullmon nulldlnc
i)
Cnicico laic Trttuna llull.lhu
NR1VS HUnUAUH!
WiantNSTON UtlHElD.
N. B. Cor. Ptnnirlvanla A and lllli St
flaw Yom Jluaiuu Tha Sun flulldlnx
Lokpon Utiiuu London Tn
SUBSCRIPTION TERMS
Tha EtKMva Pnuo Lieut la stned to aub
acrlnars In l'hlladelphla and aurrouudlnjr towna
at tha rate of tneUo (12) Lenta per eek, payable
to the carrier.
By mall to tAlnta outside of Philadelphia. In
the United States, Canada, or United States ro'
aesalonn. poitaze free, fifty (SO) cents per month.
Six (10) dollars per tear, payable In advance.
'io au roreirn countries one iu aouar per
aoonth.
itn.
otic Subscribers wishlnr address chanced
None
atust cl
,ve old as well as new aaartka.
BILL. J000 TTALMJT KEY&iONF. MAIV 300B
K7,jlrfdrris all eommunfcnflojia fo Evening Public
Ledger, Independence Square, Philadelphia,
Member of the Associated Preoi
1 THE ASSOCIATED I'llCSS U exclu
lively entitled to the use for republication
ef q!I netci dispatches ci edited to it or not
eCheitrtee credited in this paper, aud also
th& local news published thcieln.
All rights of tepubllcation of special dis
patches herein arc also reset red
rhlldrlpliU, Moil. Marrli "I. I'll'
MAKE KOUM FOR THK ROYS
TDECAUSE Congress, adjourned in a
-mood of spite and refused to act on
pending appropriation bills, almost all of
the offices of the Federal Employment
Service in this territory arc now being
dosed.
The employment service organized
under the auspices of the state for the
benefit of returning soldier.-, lias jet to
prove its efficiency.
In a general way, therefore, the situa
tion involves a new obligation for busi
ness men with jobs to make or to offer.
It Is the duty of every man to interest
himself personally in any soldier who
happens to apply to him for a job. If
, he himself hasn't a place to offer h
should do his utmost and use his organi
zation, if necessary, to learn whether
there isn't a job waiting around the cor
ner or in one of the establishments of his
friends.
A great many men in this city have
formed this habit already and have
therefore manifested a consistent pa
triotism and a sense of duty.
CENSORING MOVIE CEiNsoKb
TT WILL not do to suppose that the
state's moving-picture censors are
constitutionally wrong-minded because
they stumble occasionally and invite the
sort of verbal mauling that Judge Rogers
and Judge Wessel have just givin them
for Interfering with a film that wasn't
so bad as it might have been.
Any sort of censorship has disadv un
taxes. There is always implied the right
of a constituted authority to decide what
the public may and may not think about.
Doctor Oberholtzer and his squad
have sometimes left themselves liable to
the charge of prudery which appears be
tween the lines of the court's impatient
interrogations in the most recent movie
hearing. But in a general way it must
be admitted they have imposed a whole
some restraint on a few of the moving
picture producers who still try deliber
ately to give their pictures a tinge of
prurience. While such methods prevail
they furnish a strong argument for the
supporters of censorship.
In the film recently banned the censors
objected because of the rather free treat
ment of a theme that is as old as litera
ture that of an errant wife and a third
person. Books that deal with this topic
and grand operas in which the familiar
human difficulty is set to gorgeous music
are not banned or censored. They thrivo
and multiply. This knowledge is a con
stant irritation to these film producers.
It is undeniable that the movies rancre
next to the public schools in the impor- j
tance 01 tneir influence upon vouthful
minds. And it is for this reason that
moving-picture producers are under a
peculiar obligation to Jhe public. There
is no reason why they should ever use a
questionable action or a disagreeable
theme because they have the advantage
of a virgin field and all the nobler mo
tives of accumulated literature for then
material. LINKING UP THE AMERICAS
TF MR. HURLEY'S forecast of tho
T establishment of an American line of
large passenger and freight steamships
between this country and the Latin re
publics is correct, it is a significant index
that American commerce is at last
, taking a logical and long-neglected
course.
Considering our assumption of polit
ical interests in the whole Western
. Hemisphere, our trade relations have
peen pitifully inadequate. Passenger
travel has often been diverted into the
' 'most roundabout routes, many vovairers
jIIH
&! h'vtos: found it more expeditious to
jP teach Buenos Aires or Rio by way of
some trench or English port than by
, direst steamship from New York. Two
OCean crossings for whnt. nrmnlH Vu !
kw? a sense merelv n poastinc Wn .,li;-
bfr' tale, of course, an absurdity.
Cm-jm- ie rucinc Hiue conauions are al-
r, - moat equally bad. The west coast nan.
kj! ! Monger trade is controlled 'by a Peruvian,
j ,a uwean and a British company. Since
tne united states and Brazil line went
, o&t of existence no regular American
-waAefurer &prvitA 1ik hfnu m:nf..tMA.i
HWither the south Atlantic or south
'-Pacific
'JkDurintr the war. however, the frfil,f
tryipe grew prodigiously. Mr. Hurley'n
I , v,l"Bn inciuuca we uispaicn ot passenger
I .,? fcfclps. They should greatly stimulate
. j"-bib tourist travel and trade, and on the
WLi wpewm iae snoum maice oovious cer-
gr.Vtain advantages of the Panama Canal,
neriQ wunour. practical realization.
'There haa lone been an uncomfortable
ov in proclaiming tho Monroe
l 'With regard to countries with
c(witrMM inUreeurae waa
so slight. Exceptional opportunities for
strengthening1 Pan American solidarity
ure at hand today. Vessels of the Latin
American merchant marine should be
seen In our northern ports, lirazll sends
us her Lloyd-BruzUelro ships today, but
Peru and Chile are laggards. In ex
change the Stars and Stripes would cease
to be n rarity in Rio, "I). A." and
"Valr ."
Geographical neighbors can best work
out their destiny if they maintain also
strong commercial ties.
LI VKLY FAITH KS TI1K
YKHY STUFF OF VICTORY
The Aducntc of Charier llcvinion al the
llarrisburg Mcurlnp Are Going to the
Capital Willi Confidence
WHEN Marshal I''och was asked the
other day how he succeeded in turn
ing the German offensive into a defensive
and then into a defeat the distinguished
soldier said that victories are won by
science, but also by faith. "When one
has taith," he continued, "one docs not
retire." "I have but one merit," he went
on. "that of never despairing."
General Gouraud's mestage to the
Fourth French Army on' the eve of the
second buttle of the JIkiiio was inspired
liv the same idea. He wrot": "Nobodj
will look back. Nobody will turn back
one tep!" There is here the determina
tion to win, bncked bj faith in ultimate
victory.
If these utterances hud been directed
to the hearts and minds of the men who
are planning to go to Harrisburg tomor
row to urge the necessitj of chuiter re
vision for this city upon the General
Assembly they could not have been bet
ter phrased.
The charter will be revised, and it will
be reised in the right wav. Whatever
may be the prospects now, there are men
behind the plan who have the one meiit
of never despairing. They will not admit
their defeat. Thej may meet setbacks,
but they will persist in the course on
which the have set out until they have
reachtd the goal.
There are two forces that, must be
overcome. The first is the I'oice of in
ertia, o'- tin1 tendency of a great bod to
continue m the diiection in which it is
headed. It was the upnatiou ot this
force which destroyed the Titanic. When
the iceberg appeured in the path of the
stcanwh'p the vessel was moving with
such momentum that its direction could
not be changed in time to avoid a colli
sion. But the direction in wh'ch a tcamhip
is moving can be changed if you give it
leeway enough and time enough. The
most perfect steering gaar et invented
is not powerful enough to oveicume in an
instant the force of inertia.
Philadelphia has been moving in a
given llhection for yeais. It is bigger
than anj steamship and the momentum
which it has aeciuired is -o irreat that
it is unreasonable to expect its course to I
be changed overnight. W'e ure accus
tomed to the present charter. Tho whole I
machinerj of the city government i-j
geared in accordance with its regula
tions. And it is in motion.
But it can be headed in a new dircc
tion when enough people decide that
they want a change. If the attempt to
send it tn new paths had begun this win
ter for the first time, there would be I
little hope of accomplishing anything
tilts year. But this is the culmination of
a long period of discussion by men who
have not despaired of better things.
The second obstacle in the way of bet
terment is the selfish interests of men
who object to change btcause it will
make it necessary for them to readjust
themselves to new conditions. They are
politicians with business interests. Their
political organization is based upon pres
ent ward divisions, and upon the coun
cilmanie system under which the ward is
the unit of representation. Change will
make it necessary to rebuild the political
organization on a new basis. And when
business and politics ure united change
will force the men who are in politics
for profit to establish new political con
nections in order to conserve their finan
cial interests.
The efforts to remove this obstacle are
met by secret and hidden forces which
darp not come into the open. No man is
so brazen as to oppose reform on the
ground that it will compel him to rebuild
his political machine.
So much for what we are fighting
against.
The real thing that we are fighting for
is a greater measure of home rule. We
cannot get that degree of home rule
which we should because the constitution
will not permit it. But we can secure
greater control over our own affairs.
The adoption of the provision in the char
ter draft of the committee of citizens
permitting the city to clean its own
streets nnd collect its own ashes and
garbage when it decides that it is not
more prudent to permit contractors to
do this work would be a distinct gain for
home rule. It puts the whole matter up
to the discretion of the responsible au
thorities. No valid reason can be urged
against it.
The other changes proposed are for
the purpose of making the city govern
ment more responsive to populp.r senti
ment. The present Councils are not rep
resentative of the people. The members
of Select Council are elected from wards
and u majority of the members repre
sent a minority of the population. A
Council elected from constituencies of
uniform population would be really rep
resentative. And a small Council of u
single chamber would be u much more
efficient body and more quickly respon
slvo to the popular will than the present
large and unwieldy local legislature.
We want to separate tho police, and
firemen from politics so completely' that
they cannot be used as the tools of any
man, whether he bo a ward boss or the
agent of a political organization holding
office as the Commissioner of Public
Safety.
We want a proper budget system and
the abolition of the mandamus evil,
which plays ddckn and drakes with every
budget that haa yet been prepared.
Wo .wwtaa flkisnt Civil Seryke I
Commission which will respect the spirit
of the laws and refuse to permit itself to
be used for rewarding political workers.
And wo want also to reduce the num
ber of elective officers, to shorten the bal
lot and concentrate responsibility in the
hands of men who can be easily reached
when they betruy their trust.
These are some of the objectives which
we hope to gain in the drive that will
begin tomorrow. We shall ultimately
reach them, for the men behind tho
movement will not despair. Neither will
they look buck nor turn back one step.
CO-EDS AT VENN
SOMEWHERE within the editorial staff
of the Dully Pennsylvanian, organ of
the University's undergraduates, there
nestles a potential humorist of limitless
promise. It is impossible to imagine a
cleveier imitation of the doddering
stundpattism that characterizes u van
ishing school of American journalism
than the somber reflections inspired on
tho Pennsylvania!!'!) editorial page by
the giovvth of the co-cducntlonal idea al
Penn.
There are a thousand girl students at
tho University. To the Pennsylvanian
this knowledge is "u staggering blow."
The editor does not "dare to interpret
these recent changes." He does every
thing but "view with alarm." All the
ivied phrases that less humorous editors
have brought down with them from the
high and far-off times to impede prog
ress are flaunted to make co-eds seem
somehow awful.
The Pennsylvuniun sighs heavily, ac
cepts the co-ed as an unwelcome dispen
sation and appears to wipe its hoary
beard with palsied hand. This is in a
time when general education is admit
tedly necessary to the bafety of the
world and when, even in China, they are
ready to acknowledge that women are
people.
It may be predicted that tho next great
.- merican humorist is training on the
Pennsylvanian. But he is a bit too sub
tle for college journalism.
A WORLD SAFE FOR WALKERS?
yinTH the suggestion for public land-
' ing fields in League Island Park and
the rapidly maturing plans of a great
airplane manufacturer to demonstiate
near Philadelphia the practicability of
air transport of pa.-sengers and freight,
the day of winged traffic is brought
neater, with a fine assortment of hopes
and wonios and concerns for everybody.
When children fly a new vehicle will
have to be fodnd for Santa Claus.
Doubtless he will use the subways in
future legends. Doors will be built in
roofs. Milk will be delivered as eusily
as a nickel into a slot by an aviating
milkman.
Nowadays, when a motor maniac
makes a mistake he himself is usually
the greatest sufferer. But the ground
lings of the days to come will have a
new cause for nervousness in the knowl
edge that four thousand pounds of wood
and metal may come flopping down out
of the air at any moment.
When statesmen and lawmakers cease
to worry about the leag . of nations,
they will have to devote long periods of
mental strain to the work of formulat
ing air laws and regulations to control a
device that is filled with possibilities of
good and evil. "Travel in the air," the
aviation enthusiasts sny, "will be safer
before long than travel afoot." When
you sit down and try to visualize the
possible consequences of popular avia
tion it sometimes appears that that
statement may be true in mow ways
than one.
SUBSTITUTES FOR CHARITY
VTERY properly the committee that has
set out to save the Society for Or
ganizing Charity has suggested that the
name of the institution be changed. The
present designation hi neither happy nor
rightly descriptive.
Charity is the least important work of
the organization, unless it be admitted
that one does a great "charity who elim
inates the need of charitv.
It is a common error to suppose that
money or material help can always re
lieve the misfortunes which beset those
who need the help of organized agencies.
As a matter of fact, the general problem
of relief in any city is complicated by
accidents of ill health, deficient educa
tion, crime, family disagreements and
human frailty. In any ceule.r of popula
tion there will always be a small per
centage of people who for one reason or
another are out of adjustment with the
general scheme.
The agencies operating through the
Society for Organizing Charity aim to
relievo the unfortunate; but they aim,
too, to eliminate the causes which make
normal social readjustments difficult or
impossible for many individuals and fam
ilies. To improve housing, to prove the need
of living wages, to show tho relation be
tween poverty and illness and crime, to
keep society aware of its duties to all
its less fortunate members these are
among the chief concerns of the modern
organized "charity."
The committee which is to seek a ?15G
000 fund for the Philadelphia organiza
tion should be helped in every waj. It
is unthinkable that the work of the so
ciety should be threatened or hindered.
Lieutenant Colonel
A New Teddy? Theodore Itoosevelt,
who has Just re
turned from France, made his debut In
polities with a speech which New York
observers say was exactly llko tho
speeches his father used to make at the
outset of his career. The New York Re
publicans ara lucky If they have found
u new T. It.
Some of those states.
Who Cares? men who will havo
to et their words
before tho next session of Congress ends
will hurely suffer grievously from indiges
tion later.
Governor Sproul will Indeed win the
thanks of a "grateful public" If ho beata
down the coal price.
At the risk of scuttllnv New York's
most cherished and venerable "witticism."
Doctor Krusen maintains that eleoplnp
stekiiMa la noaexlatefit.la lata otty,
camouflage that
Meant something
Overuorked Word It Really Descriptive
ol Some' Wonderfully Ingenious
Pcrformauces by Both Our.
selves and the Foe
TV EVER n word passed Into oudden
A disrepute through excess of popularity
It was "camouflage." A couple of years
ago It not only described an Imaginatively
fascinating- featuro of modern warfare,
but It exerted as a metaphor of wcll-nlgh
Irreslstlblo allurement. A u, synonym for
"bluff," "deception," "sham," the word was
eagerly welcomed Into tho International
vocabulary. Tho first stags joko about
the tipsy man who "camouflaged" so
briety won roars of laughter. But In an
Incredibly short tlmo anything In the
world which Involved delusion was exult
antly described as "camouflage." Too ex
ultantly. Indeed, for the word soon became
a pest, and onco tho reaction had sot In
it was tho part of conscious conversa
tional cleverness and ortlbtlc self-control
to reftaln from uttering It.
Tho case of Gelett Burgess's haunting
and over-exploited llttlo rhyme about the
"Purple Cow" was bitterly cited. "I'll
kill jou If jou quote It," thundered the
too facile Jlnglir. Persons priding them
selves on "tuste" Indorsed the sentiment,
and within tho last year or so they enter
tained somewhat similar feelings regarding
the "camouflage" conversationalist. Taboo
smote this onco handy new word
UNFORTUNATELY, however, tho ban
against soul saddening slang has re
sulted in considerable EOlt-pedallng of the
whole camouflage theme, even In Its legltl
uiato aspect. It -would bo well to subdue
this antlpathj. for the real story of
camouflage Is still remarkable and warrants
Investigation and emphasis If tho reck
less jokesmlths are finally downed.
The wealth of existent fascination in tho
subject was Indicated by Miss Genevieve
Covvles the other day when she told tho
students of the School of Design about the
wonderful performances of the women
artists responsible for the Rwirling ara
besques of color upon tho hulls, masts,
funnels and deckvvorkn of American
steamers plowing the war-zono waters.
That all this van veritable camouflage)
not the most ascetic speech purist need
be loath to admit. But Mls Cowles's talk
was confidential. The details of wfiat
those Ingenious "camou Houses" did are not
yet publicly divulged.
Congress, however, self-confessedly de
lights In frankness, and just before Mr.
Wilson clamped down the lid on "capitol
offenses" Representative Alvan T. Fuller,
of Massachusetts, summed up some of the
HChievements of the American Camou
flage Corps that should stimulate lpvers of
the piquant and picturesque. Theoreti
cally he vocallj addressed his fellow legis
lators. As a matter of fact no tongue was
given to his words, for they" appear only
in the solemn und bulky last number of
the Slxty-flfth Congress, Issued to March
15. Amid much that Is ponderous, pre
tentious and dry, Mr. Fuller's account of
his trip to Europe since tho armistice Is
conspicuously diverting, and particularly
his consideration of m ingenious camou
flaging, both Yankee and Hun.
THE importance of tho rolo which
scenic trickery played in the war is
illustrated with figures that are truly
astonishing. During the summer of 1918
alone tho Camouflage Corps used more
than four millions square yards of burlap,
two hundred thousand gallons of paint,
ten hundred thousand seven hundred fish
nets, fifty thousand pounds of wire and
more than two million square yards of
poultry netting.
Many of the ruses to which resort was
mado were employed o deceive the Ger
man aviating photographers. Fish nets,
for instance, when seen by a high-altitude,
camera lens cannot bo distinguished from
barbed wire, and the literal webs of
stratagem were often most efficiently
used to convince that enemy that long
stretches of entanglements had been re
paired. The photographs seemed, to say
so and they thus played havoc with Hun
artillery plans. On one occasion, however,
the neta were erected so much moro
swiftly than any barbed wiro could bo
that the enemy was undeceived. Despite
the camera he knew that the alleged ob
structlon must be a fako barrier. This
deficient sense of tlmo values proved
costly. "In camouflage work," writes Mr.
Fuller, "one can't afford to be slipshod."
THE burlap scejiery, painted with all
the vivid art of a Hawes Craven or a
Joseph' Physloc, was a device tho use of
which tho general public haa been for
some tlmo aware. The "false contours"
concealed gun position, ammunition dumps
and the like, the burlap being stretched
over a sort of trellis made of poultry net
ting and given tho Impression of a hill
or rlso of ground. Occasionally, It said, a
bewildered cow fell through one of these
bogus "pastures."
But one of tho novelties of which the
civilian has been less cognizant wero the
sham paths, supposedly marking tho way
td gun positions. These were made of the
earth-colored matting, used In peace times
as clothing by the women of Madagascar.
As the American army called for ten
thousand miles of theso woven "dress
goods" Mr. Fuller's talo that the dusky
Hova ladles wero hurled, Bartorlally
speaking; back to a state of nature during
the war la quite credible.
If the Teutons were puzzled by tomo
of our delusions they by no means lacked
retallatlvo skill. One of tho cleverest
feata narrated by the Congressman con
sisted In establlsldng a battery emplace
ment without a betraying path. Tho
boche who left no tracks used a couple
of wooden biscuit box covers. Ha tied
strings to them, stood on one cover,
threw the other ahead of him, jumped
on that and repeated tho process until
ho reached his destination, No red Indian
ever covered up his tracks moro cleverly,
.flAMOUFLiAGE" resumes respectable
j verbal standing when the matter
with which It ought to deal Ju treated.
It will figure in many moro good war
...I. nnt Vn thft Mnvarmll...! il.,.
should refrain from onubbinj; tho word In
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THE ELECTRIC CHAIR
TTORACB HOOK writes that spring haa
-- been neglected In our department. On
tho contrary, Horace, we've been celebrat
ing It all winter long.
Horace sends us the following, tho best
spring poem we've seen this year:
1919 Springpome
Spring pussy-willow-footed in,
Crept slyly into winter's yard.
And dropped a crocus with .. grin
Upon his lawn marked "Spring, Her
Card."
HORACE HOOK.
From tho London Times;
Business Opportunities
BELGIAN BATTLEFIELDS. SALE,
immediate possession ; all in excellent
repair.
How bitter that must sound to a retired
woodcutter at Amerongen!
But tho surest sign of spring that we
know is when the medlclne-man banjo
shows begin again on South street, and tho
barker stands at tho front door expounding
tho virtue of bladderwort pills.
The following piteous outburst is pla-
carded outsldo a saloon:
Do not ask what WE are going to do after
July first,
BUT what In tho name of God and your
Loss of Liberty
Are YOU going to do'.'
The answer is, Without.
Mr. Lodge seems to have chosen the path
of least consistence.
In response to many appeals we are
happy to reprint a poem by Charley Towne,
the sweet singer of Manhattan, Milch ap
peared somo time ago In the Smart Set.
It is to be included In Charley's new book
of poems, tho title of which wo don't know.
On Seeing a Nun in a Taxicab
Little sister, did you know,
When I taw you through the glass of tho
cab.
That your lifo held as great contrasts
As the lives of deposed kings and czars?
Ono moment, a lonely cell;
Then this sudden projection Into flaming
Fifth avenue!
How strange the streets must have seemed
to you.
Little white sister, sitting there so still!
I was In a 'bus,
And at Forty-second street tho trafllc
halted us,
Side by side, and I could almost have
touched you. .
I peered into your privacy,
LlkeMie fool that I was,
And I felt ashamed of myself
When I saw In your hands a rosary;
Yopr lips were moving,
And I turned away.
When you reached your destination,
I still wonder, unworldly llttlo sister,
If you realized that oven you
Wore expected to tip the chauffeur!
CHARLES HANSON TOWNE.
Tho pedestrian loitering thoughtfully
toward his rolltop desk Hnda a baker's
truck backed up against the stage en
tranco of a Chestnut street automat and
three or four energetic hirelings passing
In trays of fragrant oyster pies, beef pies,
cinnamon buns, chocolate eclairs and all
tho attractive pasties that make their way
to tho llttlo nickel-slotted gloss windows.
A colored humorist pulls them out from
the racks In the truck with a long, shining,
hooked rod; another seizes tho tray as it
emerges and passes it to a busy Jugo
slav standing in the doorway; he In turn
forwards thJ tray to a hustling charwoman
in a blue apron, who passea it Inward
toward tho ultimate consumer. The humor
ist and his assistant were passing them
out too fast for the Jugoslav and a couple
of trays of steaming beef pies had got
sidetracked and were lying In the cold air.
"Grub up dem beef pies', bo!" cried the
i jf wy ... v j-tvs, v wcu mio
poor 111 pies Ho out hero an' get all chilled.
Boy, dem plcs'll get dat Influenza if you
don't make has'."
It Is doubtful whether the- Jugo-Slav
fully understood this admonition, but he
grabbed tho trays and hastened them on
their way.
Somo people are born sober; some
achieve sobriety; the rest havo sobriety
thrust upon them.
Sentiment and Signs
Metliought I'd write a song of charm,
Somo simple, heart-felt rhyme.
Of my old home down on tho farm.
Where passed Ufo's glad springtime.
With pads and pencils well supplied
I motored' forth ono morn
And sought again the countrysido
And house where I was born,
Tho dear old lane! At sight of it
I'd many kind of thrills;
But thero I read, "To Keep You Fit
Use Quackham's Liver Pills.
To weep for Joy did I commence
At old, familiar scenes;
But thero on our old orchard fonco
A sign read, Bowser's Beans.
Tho woodland path! Ah, there it lies!
Where, first In trembling hope
I rend my fate In Dora's eyes:
What's this? Use Skinner's Soap.
I'll give it up! How can words flow
In sentlmantal vein
In sight of this: Eat Oleo,
Try Stiffneck's Oil for Pain?
MAUD FRAZER JACKSON.
Well, now that Doctor Lowell came
through the ordeal successfully, does any
one else want to try a one-night stand
with Senator Lodge what we might call
a Lodging for the Night?
Once upon a time wo read a japo that
amused us greatly. We don't recall where
it came from, but it goes llko this:
"Ho belonVs to a very old family, doesn't
he?"
"Yes, a fln- old Bible family. Some of
his ancestors ran down a steep place Into
the sea."
When a certain very young gentleman
reaches Cambridge, Mass., today we hope
he will have sufficient loyalty to tho city
of his birth to register as ''Woodrow Wil
son Sayre, of Philadelphia."
Dr. Philip Hawk, of the Jefferson Medi
cal College, says that eating pie for break
fast is a perfectly safe and rsano thing to
do.
Which deprives tho practlco of half lis
pleasure. Most of the fun we got from
eating pio and sinkers for breakfast lay
in the feeling that we were a proud rebel,
an Iconoclast, magnificently contradicting
natural law in tho edible world.
On our way to the office we frequently
peer In at tho windows of a big power
houso whero some huge dynamos aro purr
ing away. Our electrical friends may be
interested in Henry Adams's admirable de
scription of tho dynamo as a spiritual sym
bol. He says (In tho Education of Henry
Adams):
"To Adams the dynamo became a sym
bol of Infinity. As he grew accustomed to
the great gallery ot machines, ho began to
feel tho forty-foot dynamos as a moral
force, much as the early Christians felt the
Cross. The planet Itnelf seemed less Im
pressive, la Us old-fashioned, deliberate,
annual or dally revolution, than thls'hugo
wheel, revolving within arm's length at
some vertiginous speed, and barely mur
muring scarcely humming uii audlblo
warning to stand a hair's-breadth further
for respect of power while It woi)ld not
wake the baby lying close against Its frame.
Before the end, one began to pray to It;
Inherited instinct taught the natural ex
pression of man before silent und Infinite
force." i
Old traditions aro being blasted every
day. Somo oivb lot loose a white rat or
.some- kind of a speedy rodent at the Gar
rlck Tlicatro during Saturday matinee, and
not ono lady ccreamed or climbed n. scut.
i ti ------
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uJViuj,(ya, -
BRANCHES ! V
Sill
WSj
A QUEER WORLD
JfTUS a funny world wo llvo in
-- If wo will but stop and think.
How that everything is mixed up.
And so much Is on tho "bliiik."
Humanity Is bubbling o'er
With too much of selfishness,
And most everybody's trying
Just to "do somebody else."
Tho "survival of tho Attest"
Seems to bo the law of life,
Tho Intensity of struggle a
Marks tho conflict and tho strife.
There's far too little charity
And too much of savagerj ,
Willi) on tho most important issues
Men are falling to agree.
'Tia a seething, boiling caldron
Wrth the fires of human greed,
Just "red hot" with competitions
That on fiercest passions feed.
Tho masses only know and care
For Individual gain.
And exemplify the spirit '
Of an "Abel's brother Cain."
Though the struggle may bo Bilent
Yet it's marked with rancor, hate,
Tho raco foi riches grows in speed
At a most alarming rate;
But after all Is said and done
And tho story has been tJld,
Wo do not think it's any worse
Than the "good old days of old."
-Augustus Treadwell, in the Brooklyn
Times.
Ma on the Job
"PA,
said little Willie, "what's an echo?"
casting a mean side glance at little Willie's
ma, "is tho only thing on earth that can
cheat a woman out of the last word."
"Another definition of an echo, "Willie," ob
served ina, "Is a man who goes to old
patent medicine almanacs or his alleged
wit."
And then nobody said any more words but
Willie, whose infant mind was naturally con
fused by all this persiflage. Cleveland Plata,
Dealer,
What Do You Know?
QUIZ
1. How often Is the number ot Congressmen
to which each stnte la entitled In the
House of Representatives subject to
revision?
2. What Is the origin of tho word "oulja?"'
3. Where Is the Isle of Man?
4. What Is meant by a deal table?
E. What ts chervil?
C. What la hexameter verse?
7. Why Is a nightingale sometimes called
Philomel?
5. Who was Malibran?
D. What Roman god is commemorated in
tho name of tho present month7
10. Which is tho "Bear Stato"?
Answers to Saturday's Quit
1. John Tyler, tenth President of the United
States, was married twice and had
fourteen children.
2. 'The Bhlp had pratique" means that It
was granted a clean bill of health and
could enter port. Pratique Is the li
cense to hold intercourse with a port,
granted after tho ship has passed
quarantine.
3. Dolomite is a kind of rock composed of
a double carbonate of lime, and mag
nesia and often fantastically shaped,
ua In the Tyrolean mountain region,
known as the Dolomites.
i, Reynard is the personal name for a fox.
D. Sao Paolo is the second largest city Sn
Brazil.
6. A proa Is a kind of boat used by the
Malays In (he East Indies.
7. Spain waa a republlo from 1S7S to 1875.
8. Sixteen drains make an ounce -in avoir
dupois weight.
9. Mexico. In Spanish should be pronounced
as though spelled "May-hce-co," with
the accent on the first, syllabi?. The
usual modern spelling of the word In
Spanish ts Mejtco, but the valuo of
the "J" and the "x" is the" same.
10, Admiral Nlblack waa In command of ,tho
, United SUtea, fleet t hi. jthe Medttwr ,
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