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Pbilidtlphla, MonJir, r,bru.ry 10. 1914
OUR EMISSARIES TO THE WILD
0
F COURSE there will be passionate out
cries lit Congress because of the In
formal nature of our approach to the Bol
shevists and the clastic-minded gentlemen
named by Mr. Wilson to deal with the
'wild, wild Russians In the wilder Princes
islands. And yet it Is apparent that the
President has approached this odd problem
with characteristic subtlety and resource
fulness. William Ailon White u a friendly sort
of man with a soul stoutly buttressed with
the hard common sense of the Middle West
Ho Is shrewd. He is likely to be very pa
tient and he has the Journalist's knack for
putting large truths In little woras. lie
has a way with him. If any one can iow
a Red that the modern social order is a
pretty fine thing when It Isn't perverted
and that it really represents the sum of
human experience for some thousands of
years, Mr. White is the man. He has
none of the Inhibitions of the piofesstonal
diplomatist. And isn't he a humorist be
sides? No man who is not essentially wise
can. be a humorist!
In Professor Ilerron, the other Amet lean
representative, the Bolshevists will meet a
,man who Is more or less familiar with the
focky road upon which the soul of Russia
Is now wandering. The professor himself
has a roaming and experimental conscious
Bess. He has tried many wajs of life. He
is a radical with enthusiasms somewhat
cooled In the cold winds of experience. He
may even be able to tell the Bolshevists a
few things that they do not know about
their own theories
Indeed, the Princes Islands conference
ought to be one of the most diverting and
vividly Interesting spectacles over staged in
this more than various world. It will be a
culminating clash between emotion and
'vCfSiojrimon sense. The Journalist fortunate
enough to sit in at the sesslon-i will have
'better material for copy than any now
available, even at Paris.
NOT STUNG YET
Qc
kUITE emphatically Governor jjproul
has Informed the boomers that he
isn't entertaining an presidential bee In
his bonnet.
, Wise man!
One of the saddest of Ameraan insti
tutions Is the Perpetual Candidate. The
t P. C, loses interest In an office almost as
soon n.3 he acquires It. His Job becomes
for him merely a step upward to another.
Naturally,, there Is a good deal of faulty
administration in consequence.
Kowadays the people have an Increasing
V V- resrject for the mall who does his wnrl;.
. j - f
pT" That Is why the really great offices are
jpFfct'4, reserved for those who do not make Job-
huntjng an occupation.
r-t. -
itJf' UOU1UK t;U.WhLL AiSU TEMPLE UNI
afa SS
.!( fcKSil'
p' - A MAN is not only known by his work,
ilft, but a man is his work.
bit, X man's rrork is his embodied spirit.
p f Flesh and blood will pas3, hut the spirit
, -lives forever.
IV "We are such stuff as dreams are made
ft. of," said the Bard In pessimistic mood.
f , But therein lies our immortality. Our
- dreams ure ponderable when our physical
4'& u1i-ia hnvn naaaeA Avon n lw n mAwiA..
They aro alive and active Jn the world
-when tho brains that gave them birth ate
," atllled' forever.
f Tho life work of every man Is to ma
terialize the Bplrlt within him. His sue
cess in life must be yauged by the beauty
" ot the soul thus made visible.
i- Sometimes the man as we know him and
t'-it his work as we see It seem wholly dts-
Muiiiiu. w. imci uuiusuubii. iur instance,
r4' .. ... .... .
jj -I, it was earn ne wrote line an angel and
'V ' - talked like poor Poll. We have known In
' Sot own history men of the highest In
JS 'eKTy a3 statesmen who were decidedly
"' Aoff cc-tor In their social relations. But
Cprdlnarlly the man and his work are of
.tfiilSi-oiie personality and of the same moral
. - t- r. - . , ,
jo muaiuy.
'4,5$ "Frequently the man and his work are so
l.UlftuUBIiJj' milt twBviiici llltll 11 13 lUllO
'-impossible to think of one without the
"sithsr. Edison and Kord mean electricity.
Bd flivvers.
In tho same way, Dr. Russell H, Conwell
ns Temple University.
;And when we say Temple University we
not mean the handsome building that
rt the name. That Is merely part of
R trappings that deck a great Idea.
Temple University Is the concrete ex-
Mlon of the thought that all human
ngs can bo Improved by education; that
should be given an opportunity to get
education, and that steps should be
to make them desire that education.
Tho flowering of that thought has made
iitent clergymen out of coal heavers;
heads out of drudges; great
vea out of apathetic laborers; think-
out of automatic machines.
University has done these
' ic doing: them, and In the doing of
vMbJe 'the soul of Doctor
iBeM
i - -W-.
.tf9
Q
r
Conwell, the man who, abovo all other
men, made Temple University possible.
Doctor Conwell's story of Temple Uni
versity begins in the Evkninci Public
I.mxiKii today. U Is a story told by a
past master In the use of words, who de
liberately refrains from making his narra
tlvo anything but a plain matter-of-fact
chronicle of events. But Its very simplicity
engages the interest nnd holds the atten
tion. Of himself ho says voiy little. He is not
thinking of anything but Temple Univer
sity. And simply because of that fact his
story has all the fascination of autobi
ography. Kor the story of Temple Univer
sity is tho llfo history of Dr. Russell H.
Co'nwell.
NOW IS THE TIME TO BE
A DULL IN THE MARKET
Governor Sproal Realitcs It When He De
mands the Expenditure of (80,000,000
for Stile Improvements
rpiIU next twenty years In this country
- belong to the optimists, to the men who
aro bulls on America and have confidence
In tho recuperative powers of this Irre
pressible people.
Much peaceful business has been at a
standstill for nearly four years, and more
of It has been stagnant for two years. Thfi
energies of tho nation were concentrated
on winning the war and we surprised our
selves and tho rest of the world by the
things which we did. There has been a
revelation of tho resources of America
which has astounded the experts who
thought they knew all about them.
The problem of switching the war ener
gies back Into peaceful channels Is not
beond us oven though somo pessimists
are wearing crape and telling us that it
can't be dono without great los and suf
fering Pennsylvania fortun,itel has an optimist
In the Governor's chair in Harrisburg, Mr.
Sproul Is not worrying about the future,
but Is making plans for public Improve
ments which will go a long way toward
providing work for tho Idle whllo pri
vate industry is readjusting Itself to
absorb tho men discharged from the atrny.
But tho relation of his road program to
unemployment is only Incidental It will
give woik to unskilled labor, it is true.
Tenders of stone crushers, men to shovel
the crushed stone Into freight cars and
then to cait It to the toads and spread it
on the ground, concrete mixers and cement
makers and the rest will be employed by
the thoutands when work on the roads
begins. Civil engineers to survey the roads
and fix the grades and drive! s of road
rollers and other skilled labor will also be
required. The Governor has proposed that
the Delaware River bridge bo Included In
the toad program and suggests that the
State set apart $4,500,000 as its share of
the tost. This bridge will provldo work
for skilled brldgo builders and for tho
workers in the steel mills of tho State.
But the Governor has put himself and
his Influence behind this great plan for
spending $80,000,000 on the highways in
tho next four years because he is a bull on
Pennsylvania. lie has confidence in the
future of this great industrial and agri
cultural Commonwealth. He is persuaded
that money spent on roads will bo profit
ably invested because it will facilitate
communication between buyer and seller
Just as the steam railroads and the electric
telegraph and tho telephone have done. It
will develop a community of Interest among
the different sections of tho State, because
It will bring those sections into closer
touch with one another. We have the
credit and we can raise the money which
the voters have said should be spent. The
State Is to be congratulated on the fact
that' It has a Governor with the nerve to
demand that it be spent at once in accord
ance with a policy of enlightened com
mercial statesmanship.
The taxpaers aro not likely to overlook
the Governor's remark that thirty-ton
motortrucks will not be allowed to use the
State roads. No ordinary highway can
stand up under the pounding of such heavy
vehicles. We have given franchises to
steam railroads to carry heavy freight.
Those roads pay a tax to the State. They
own their right of way and they maintain
it at their own expense. Heavy trucks, at
no expense for their right of way and at
no cost for the maintenance of that right
of way, may be able to .compete with tho
railroads in carrying freight. But wo
have learned during tho last eighteen
months what ten-ton tracks will do to tho
roads built for lighter vehicles, and tho
taxpayers are In no mood to be burdened
with the cost of upkeep of highways for
the benefit of a traffic which can bo carried
on tho railroads. This does not mean that
motortrucking must be abandoned, but that
there must be a reasonable limit to tho
weight of the load which the roads and
bridges are to be called on to carry. There
is legitimate business for the motortrucks
as feeders for the steam railroads and to
supplement those roads for comparatively
short hauls, but the people are unwilling to
be taxed to provldo a right of way for a.
ehlcle with a load as heavy as that carried
by a freight car.
The primary put pose of the new road
system will be to serve the convenience of
the people of the State. This is evident
from the Governor's statement that it is
planned to connect tho county seats first
and to make these connecting roads where
feasible parts of trunk roads running from
one end of the Commonwealth to the
other.
It may cost more to build roads now
than in ten years. But no successful busi
ness man postpones for ten years build
Jng an addition to his factory If his busi
ness demands expansion. Nor does he
wait for the price to come down to put
in Improved machinery when ho knows that
It can be operated prontably. It would be
Just as foolish for tho State, to wait for
the price of labor and raw materials to
fall before It spends money on roads. Wo
need the roads now and have needed thorn
for years. Pennsylvania Is one of the
most backward of the States In the East
in the matter of road building. Only 4.5
per cent of the publlo highways have been
improved, whereas In Massachusetts 51.7
per cent aro Improved. In New Jersey 80.8
per cent of the roads are surfaced, and In
New York 27.0 per cent. Thlrly-one States
have a higher percentage of Improved
roads than Pennsylvania, and yet this Is
one of the richest and most populous com
monwealths In the whole Union. "Wo have
grown rich bocauso of natural resources.
We can afford to pay tho market prlcb for
road builders whatever It Is and wo can
afford to pay tho market prlco for road
materials. Tho labor and tho raw mate
rials are to bo had within the State
boundaries. Tho money spent will remain
here and tho benefit to accrue will bo
shared by every one. With Buch poor roads
as wo have the automobllo has Increased
tho value of every ucro of real estate.
Good roads wllj increase real cstato values
so much more that, no matter what the
toads cost, if tho money Is honestly spent
the assessed value of tho land In tho State
will show a gain far In excess of tho
bills paid to Improve the highways.
Yes, it is a good thing to have a Gov
ernor who la a bull on America and a
bull on Pennsylvania, with confidence In
the future.
WHAT NOT TO DO WITH RAILROADS
Tyrit. BRYAN, who has almost always
J-'J- suggested tho wrong remedy for ad
mitted Ills, Is outdistanced in folly by tho
representative of the railroad brotherhoods
who has proposed a solution of the rail
road problem.
Mr. Bryan told tho Rivers and Harbors
Congicss In Washington that tho federal
government should own tho trunk lines,
because It would cost too much lo buy the
feeding lines. He said thnt this plan
would tegulntc rates by natural competi
tion and benefit tho whole country. It
would obvlato the necessity of establish
ing n railroad bureau In Washington and
would preserve tho independent control
of tho States over tho railroads wholly
within their borders. A practical railroad
man could puncture this plan so full of
holes In flvo minutes that It would look
like a slove.
But the railroad brotherhood plan, set
forth before tho Senate Committee on In
terstate Commerce by Glenn E. Plumb, Is
so wildly impractical and visionary that
it is astounding that a man in full pos
session of hi"! senses should seriously sug
gest It.
Mr. Plumb would have tho government
buy tho roada at tho appraised value of
their physical plant, regardless of tho
value of their franchises or of tho amount
of money that has legitimately been spent
upon them. Then ho would havo an
operating corporation organized whoso
solo capital should consist of operating
ability. This corporation would be man
aged by a board of directors, one-third
chosen by the railroad employes below the
grade of appointed officials, one-third by
the appointed officials and the final third
by tho President of tho United States.
One-half of the profits of operation would
go to the employes and the other half to
tho government.
It will be seen at once that this is a
plan for Joint ownership of the railroads
by the employes and the government,
with control vested In tho hands of
the employes. But the employes are
spared the responsibilities of ownership.
They are to share in tho profits, but
they are not to stand any of the
losses. The losses would, of course, be
met by a tax on the people and the
control over wages would rest in the
hands of tho men who received them, A
more oae-slded plan was never before seri
ously proposed to Congress. A more
ridiculously impractical one was never
devised by the Bolshevists.
What the outcome of the railroad situa
tion will be we do not know, but we are
confident that there Is enough common
sense In tho American people to Insure
that it will not Involve any such unfair
and confiscatory program as this. Better
have out and out ownership by the gov
ernment and be dono with it, tragic as
that would surely prove.
DOCTORS ON STRIKE
AtfXJCTOR on a strike is a new and
stunning phenomenon. And the med
ical men in the school Inspection service
seem to be In deadly earnest. They receive
$600 a year. They want $1000( and they
will strike, we are told, on the first of
March, unless the Increase is granted,
Now, doctors are human. They haven't
had a pay Increase since 1912. And since
1912 they have had to face high costs of
living and Income taxes like the rest of us.
It is presumable that their little thermom
eters and their scalpels and all the other
dreadful appliances of tho profession have
acquired wings of price. And there Is the
high cost of fllvvlng, a mightily important
matter for a doctor who is always In a
hurry.
The Board of Education is hard-pressed
for money, but It appears it will have to
rustle around and find more money for
its medical men. The school service Is
vitally important. It a visiting physician
did no more than send one child with a
contagious affliction out of a roomful of
tots once a year he would earn the $1000
that he asks. And he would, In the end,
save the community more than the cost of
his services for a twelvemonth. Doctors
are patient folk, and for that reason too
many people have a dim notion that they
ought to do all their work as they now do
a great deal of It for nothing. As a mat
ter of fact they have to grind along under
exactly the same burdens that trouble most
of their patients.
T h e Socialists a t
Berne, who claim to
liave the secret of
Tho lioot
of l.vll
peace and happiness
in their philosophy, are quarreling and quib
bling more passionately than the old-fashioned
diplomatists at Paris. It Is with human
nature that the faults of civilization Ho and
It Isn't) any easier now than It ever was
to make an ideal world by political schemes
alone.
It Is rather reinlnts
I'oor Dears! cent of a fumlllar
feminine habit, Un't It,
to observe that Miss Alice Paul anjl her
militant suffragists, who expended limitless
time and energy In efforts to get abroad to
heckle the President, should land In France
with their banners arid .their speech-burning
apparatus Just us Mr, Wilson Is packing to
depart for home?
"We are through with
Always Doubtful the old order," cried
Chancellor Ebert to
the new Oerman Assembly. Now, If he had
made that promise about the old disorder,
the world could look to the people beyond
the Rhine with little more sympathy.
THE RISING TOTAL
OF LEGAL HOLIDAYS
l Pennsylvania Will Havo Eleven
Yearly Should the Cclcbra'
tion of Roosevelt's Birth
day Be Authorized
TDE8PONSIVE to America's affectionate
' admiration of Theodore Roosevelt,
strikingly manifested In tho heartfelt trib
utos paid to his memory throughout the
nation yesterday, Is tho proposal to add
his birthday to the list of holidays. Repre.
sentatlve Edmonds has brought up tho
subject In Congress. His bill Is as precedent-shaking
as tho great American whom
It honors, for if Roosevelt Day is estab
lished by Federal law, October 27 will bo
come tho first of national holidays. ,
It is the popular misconception that tho
Fourth of July falls Into this class. Its
official observance wherever the American
flag files Is, however, not tho result of' all
lncluslve Washington legislation. Congress
has prescribed the celebration for the terri
tories, insular possessions and the District
of Columbia. Elsewhere the authority
comes from the States. Naturally, all of
them have ordered the festival. They are
unanimous, too, In giving tho official sane
tlon to Christmas and to Thanksgiving
Da
VDDLY enough, although the date of
V this holiday is suggested in the annual
presidential proclamation and every State
In tho Union acts upon his tip, thero Is no
law ordering recognition of it in tho Dis
trict of Columbia. That federally adminis
tered political division is also a laggard
with respect to New Year's Day. So also
Is Massachusetts, but these are the only
exceptions. Every State has created Wash
ington's Birthday a holiday.
Herewith, savo for election day, the uni
formity ends and local predilections be
come assertive. Nine southern Statos, for
example, celebrate the birthday of Jeffer
son Davis and twenty-six States that of
Lincoln. Georgia takes tho palm for
broad-mindedness, for both the leader of the
Confederacy and tho savior of tho Union
are honored by legal holidays In that Com
monwealth, Texas has an additional Inde
pendence Day In March L signalizing her
freedom from Mexican rule. Vermont re
members tho victory of Bennington on
March lfi, and Louisiana the triumph at
New Orleans on January 8.
TF A specialist in holidays were to adopt
swift aviation as his mode of travel,
he could, by visiting the right States at
the right time, enjoy an average of a legal
holiday a week throughout the entire year.
There would even be a few festivals left
over, for fifty-four holidays with State
sanction are registered on the calendar of
the Union. Surveying the entire world, a
life of gladsome ease could probably be
fegally insured.
The statistician who delights in telling
one that every time the clock ticks a child
Is born, a Ford Is produced, a new novel
completed or a new law passed, would be
unfaithful to his mission If he neglected
to add that virtually every day is a holiday
somewhere on earth.
Foreign travelers have long had an
Inkling of this, notably in Spain, Mexico,
Russia and Bulgaria. Thirty-three legal
holidays, religious and secular, are rubri
cated on the calendar of the last-named
country. Turkey has an equal number,
but their observance is factional. Moham
medans, Jews and the various species of
Christians exhibit separatist tendencies in
their festivals.
OF LATE years the holiday total in
Pennsylvania has been rising. The in
clusion of Roosevelt Day would bring the
number up to eleven. Columbus Day and
Lincoln's Birthday are comparative new
comers. Labor Day belongs to the latter
part of the last century. Previous to Its
authorization a somewhat conservative at
titude on holidays prevailed. Washington
was the only national figure honored. Trib
ute was paid to the Civil War heroes on
Memorial Day and to Independence on
"The Fourth." Christmas, New Year's,
Thanksgiving, Good Friday and Election
Day completed the list.
The present penchant for honoring great
figures in American history with holidays
Is capable, of course, of wide extension
and calls for the application of no little
taste and discretion. Franklin's turn may
come, and then Pennsylvanlans may begin
to wonder why the founder of their State
Is omitted, and Robert Morris, General
Meade, Thaddeus Stevens, Bayard Taylor,
Robert Fulton (for he was born In this
Commonwealth), Muhlenbirg, Maithlaa
Baldwin, Stephen Decatur (who Is burled
In Philadelphia) and James Buchanan, our
one 'President,
The list could be prolonged. Estimates
of their various achievements naturally
differ. Holiday qualifications have not yet
been accurately tabulated. Much that is
haphazard and emotional enters into the
choice of red-letter days, when personalities
are under consideration. England evades
the quandary without a single tribute of
the sort to one of her heroes. Neither
Victoria's nor the King's birthdays are
holidays established by law. This conse,rva
tlsm Is transcended by Newfoundland with
a total of but four holidays Christmas,
New Year's, Good Friday and Empire Day.
THE procedute seems a trifle niggard.
The policy of remembering the births
of patriots, geniuses and noble characters
In the drama of civilization is susceptible
of Inspiring development. The difficulty
'of discrimination is the drawback. A
composite holiday might prove the solu
tion. A day In memory of Illustrious Penn
sylvanlans might be made an Inspiring
occasion.
Over the portals of the Paris Paptheon
gleams the golden Inscription, "To the
Great Men of the Fatherland." Only a
very few of them Hugo, Sadl-Carnot and
some 6thers are burled in the crypt. But
the "blanket" tribute stands. It is com
prehensive, dignified and suggestive of a
method applicable to the "holiday ques
tion." "Ladles and gentlemen l" said Chancellor
Ebert In addressing theflrsf Oennan As
sembly. One can admit the ladles while de
manding clamorously to know who the for
eign visitors are upon the other side of the
house.
"FOR THE MOMENT
THE CHAFFING DISH
Fresh Air and Statesmanship
THE best cure for Bolshevism is Tresh
air.
We don)t know-Just what Bolshevism is,
nor does anybody else; but that doesn't
mattor. The best cure for anything is
fresh air.
We are not going to discuss this very
exhaustively, for we are In a hurry to get
out for lunch; but, as Senator Sherman
says when he has some particularly nox
ious fume3 to emit, we "submit" our con
siderations. THE Peaco Conference did well to ap
point tho Princes Islands, delldouBly
swimming in the blue water of the Sea of
Marmora, for the meeting with tho Rus
sian Soviets. Thero will bo all the heaven
ly colors and fragrances of Asiatic spring.
The hearts of Lcnlne's emissaries, long
pent among whiskers and steaming samo
vars and the crowded ill-ventilated salons
of radicalism, will bo marvelously uplifted
by sunshine and mild blue air. Before
the session gets down to business it is to
be hoped there will be a picnic or two;,
some serf bathing, perhaps; William Allen
White, genial and friendly emissary, ac
customed to the broad airy plains of Kan
sas, will puff in and out his ample lungs;
Professor Horron, our other mandatory,
fresh descended from the snowy spires of
the Swiss, will bat out a few fungoes for
wheezing Reds in the vacant lots behind
Prlnklpo; and when they all sit down to
the table together, the dreadful vapors of
Bolshevism will have vanished like a bad
dream.
WB HAVE frequently said that if
only corncob "pipes had been intro
duced to Russia years ago, we should never
have had .the Bolshevik troubles. Steeped
In the gentle narcosis of a cob, no man
can rave too wildly over mortal perplex!
toes. If Bill White takes a few Kansas
corncobs along with him, all will be hap-
pily settled.
a
THE reason for almost all human Ills is
lack of proper ventilation. Editors,
when they write peevish articles, do so
because most editorial offices are 111 pro
vided with windows. They sit all day long
In an Incessant whirlpool of strong tobacco.
They are' heedless of the sweet spring
rains, the cleansing gusts of strong air
that scour only a few feet away. Give
them a day on the Boardwalk at Atlantic
City, or a month by the blue waters of
Prlnklpo, and all will come right. When
ever "u coma across any really construc
tive D; of thinking, be sure that It was
born either In the open air or not far from
a window. Do we nave to mention tne
Sermon on the Mount to drive our point
home?
IF WE had been sento Paris to write
articles about the Peaco Conference, the
first thing we would have done would not
have been to He In wait for tho statesmen
In the hope of getting something "exclus
ive.'' We would have gono to see the Jani
tor at tho Qua! d'Orsay to find out what
arrangements had been made for ventilat
ing the fcesslons and to count the number
of windows In the conference chamber.
Give statesmen plenty of fresh air and
everything will solve itself in time.
We often wonder whether a few electric
fans wouldn't solve the troubles of the
Senate?
Social Notes
If the man to whom wo lent "two vol
times of Tom paty's, poems we' have for-
IT IS FITTING' TO OBSERVE SILENCE"
The Ex-Kaiser
gotten who It was will return them, we
will return Page Alllnson's demijohn,
which he brought to us, full of elder, tho
night the armistice was signed. We are
holding Pago's demijohn in pledge until
the other fellow leturns those books.
. a
a
Sirs. Ann Dante says she has Invented a
husband-proof Ice box.
Herbert Johnson wants to make a second
correction in our articles on cartoonists.
He says that we have conveyed the Im
pression that he was intimate with Clare
Brlggs when they were boys together out
In old 'Braska. Intimate, that Is, in the
sense that Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer
wero intimate. He pointed out to us, from
under his umbrella the other morning,
while the drip ran down our neck, that he
was fourteen when Brlggs was seventeen,
andvthat while boys of those ages are often
friendly, they are rarely intimate. Too
much awe resides In the Jieart of the
fourteen-year-old.
Having made th)s matter quite plain by
now, we trust, we state that the discussion
of Just how well Herbie knew Clare In
those ,old days Is now completely, definitely
and finally closed.
In JVfembriam Lady Eglantine
AVe have received the following commu
nication:, Hear Bpcrates: .Fame, alosf is fleeting.
Only a short time ago my mother. Lady
Eglantine, was entertained at the Bellevue
Stratford and Justly accorded the honor of
being the most famous hen in the world.
Now I see by the papers (like Hennessy)'
that 'another fowl, calling herself Lady
Victory, Is sojourning at the Poultry Show
on the Parkway, and Is receiving tribute
as the world's greatest egg-layer.
My mother, Socrates, was of the old
fashioned .kind; publicity was always dis
tasteful io her; in spite of her achieve
ments she was no egotist; sho would mod
estly shrink from any such public contro
versy over matters that are. In the last
analysis, wholly, domestic. Until her tragic
death froiA over-production, she quietly
went about licr duties as a professional
ancestor. My father (whose name I have
unfortunately forgotten) was a Nestor
among fowls, If he knew of the pr.esent
attempt upon the part of Lady Victory and
her consort, General Pershing, to wrest
my sainted mother's well-laid honors frjm
her, ho, would be the first to protest. Gal
lant gentleman that ho was (my mother
has often told me that he was the original
forefather of the omelet mentioned by the
poet Gray) he would vindlcato the family
honor with bcJ and spur.
Unhappily I do not feel physically able
to undertake tho task of honor required
by the situation, that of challenging Lady
Victory to personal satisfaction on the
field of duel. I am crestfallen over this,
which is due to the fact that ovvlntt to an
unfortunate error at the Bellevue-Stratford
(when my mother was staying there a year
ago) I was very nearly hard-boiled in In
fancy, I' was rescued from the saucepan
Just in time, but the experience has left
me much of an invalid. But I ask It there
is not some champion In this great city
who will take up the cudgels In behalf of
my mother's reputation?
HENRIETTA EGLANTINE,
Daughter of Lady Eglantine, the world's
moat famous hen,
It is some consolation to the decanter
bury pilgrims that the longest days of the
year " between now and the First of July,
SOCRATES.
7
'''r.
J CAMPUS SONNETS '
Before an Examination
rpiIE little letters dance across the page,
- Flaunt and retire, and trick the tired
oyes;
Sick of the strain, the glaring light, I rise
Yawning and stretching, full of empty ran)
At the dull maunderlngs of a long dead
sage,
Fling up the windows, fling aside his lies;
Choosing to breathe, not stifle and be wise,
And let the air pour in upon my cage.
The breeze blows cool and there aro stars
and stars
Beyond the dark, soft masses of the elms
That whisper things In windy tones and
hght.
They seem to wheel for dim, celestial .wars;
And I I hear the clash of silver helms
Ring ley-clear from tho far deeps of night.
Talk
rpOBACCO smoke drifts up to the dim
-- celling
From half a dozen pipes and cigarettes.
Curling in endless shapes, in blue rings
wheeling.
As formless as our talk. Phil, drawllnr,
bets
Cornell will win the-rclay in a walk,
While Bob and Mac discuss the Giants'
chances;
Deep In a morris chair, BUI scowls at
"Ialk,"
John gives, large views about the last few
dances. i .
And so It goes an idle speech and aimless, vj
J lew cimiice purueeH; yet i acn uuuiiiu
The empty words the gleam of a beauty.
tameless, 4 '
Friendship and peace and fire to strike men j
blind, ,
Till the whole world seems small and bright r t
to hold ' v
Of all our youth this hour Is pure gold. i
Stephen Vincent Benet, in "Yount;
Adventure."
What Do You Know?
1. What name did the French Government
give to Belleau Wood after the victory
of the American marines there, last
June?
2. What are pommeloes?
3. What Is a vinculum?
4. What Is the origin of the exprcssioa,
"Hobson'B choIce"7
6. .What Is the largest city in Idaho?
6. Who was President of the I'nlteil State
during the Mexican War?
7. Who are the present marshals of France?
8. Why Is England sometimes called Albion?
9. What Is another name for oyster-plant?
10. Where are the negotiations for the third
renewal of the armistice to be con
ducted? Answers to Saturday's Quiz
1. Edward II, aon of Edward I of England,
was the first Prince of Wales. He was
born in 1281.
2. Ellhu Root was the head of the American
mission which visited Russia shortly
after the overthrow of the Czar !n
1917.
3. Flaccid means hanging loose or wrinkled.
I. The Carpet Bagrers were northern
political adventurers who sought a
career In the southern States after the
Civil War,
G. The new Federal tax bill Is expected te
yield more than six billion dollars.
C. "Vae vlctlal" meana "Woe to tho
vanquished I"
7, A bulbul la an eastern song thrush, at
nightingale.
8, "CJratln," usually used In English in tha
phrase, "au g-ratln," means a way of
cooking by bread-crumbing and cook
ing between two fires to produce ft ' y,
iaub vruii,
9. The real name of Nlcolal Lenlns is VlataV
mlr Utulynnoff,
10,- daeta.no Donlsettl wrote the rnuilh at 1jk
, opera "LucK"
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