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EVENING PUBLIC LEDGER PHILADELPHIA, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 19, 1915
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The Young I.ndr AcroU jJie 'Way, '"". !4
THE GUMPS Conversation Spoils the Dinner
BY SIDNEY SMITH
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LOUDER'. THERE'S SOrAE THfrJfcr
THE MATTER VJITN TW S LINE ,OrAE
U STENEfc ON THE WIRE I SUPPOSE -
YOU'O TNAJK. THEY'D NAVE 30WvETNYt
tJ,rt TO DO (DV DUMT AEANTO
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f SCHOOL DAYS -:- -:- -:- -:- fly )IKG A CLEAN SWEEP rffB fsr DAY JIMMY DROVE HIS NEW AIRPLANE HE STOLE WILLIE SMITH'S GIRL ANDTJIE ll
' ' - -' ' r GROCER'S HORSE RAN AWAY AND EVERYTHING -j- -:- tin FONTAINE FOX
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Only the Fourth
A clergyman, havlns performed
the marriage ceremony for a
couple, undertook to write out the
usual marriage certificate, but,
being In doubt "aa to the day of
the month, he asked:
"This Is the ninth, is Jt not?"
"Why, parson," said the blush
ing bride, "you do all my marry
ing, and you ought to remember
that this la only the fourth."
Pearson's Weekly.
Transmigration
One morning Jorklns looked
over his fenco and said to hla
neighbor, Harktns:
"What are you burying In that
hole?"
"Just replanting some of .my
deeds, that's all," was tne answer.
"Seeds!" exclaimed Jorklns,
angrily. "It looks more like one
of my hens!"
"That's all right," said the other.
"The seeds are Inside." Harper's.
London Opinion.
Police Olticer Want to give yourself up? What for?'
Colonel Bigamy !
' Police Officer Go and wait with the queuo of other Colonial
soldiers outside !
"Now, Lieutenant Tompkins,"
said the general, "you have the
battalion In quarter column, fac
ing south how would you get It
Into line, In the quickest possible
way, facing northeast?"
"Well, sir," said the lieutenant,
after a moment's fruitless consider
ation, "do you know, that's what
I've often wondered." Boston
Transcript.
PETEYShe Really Ought to Have Felt Complimented
Doctor's Only Chance
Wife Hello! Doctor Bunyun?
Yes? Come right away. Mr. Lit
tle has another one of his spells.
Doctor (half hour later) Why
didn't you send for me sooner?
You should not have waited till
your husband was unconscious.
Wife Well, as long as he had
his senses he wouldn't let me send
for you. New York Kvenlng
World.
By C. A. VOIGHT
Syant; Bulletin.
"It's twenty minutes to one, and
I've been watting here since a
quarter to twelve!"
"What time did he say he would
meet you?"
"Ten minutes to eleven sharp."
Perhaps Not
Sydntjr Bulletin.
lit) She Is quite unsophisticated.
She even dresses in simple print.
She All, yes; but you don't be
lieve In everything you see In print,
do you?
MOVING PICTURE FUNNIES
Kir" :
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I Mr mum.
5itfeiu.s
Cut out tho picture on all tour
nlden, Then carefully fold dotted
line 1 Its entire length. Then
dqtted.llne 1. and so on. Fold each
section underneath, accurately.
When completed turn over and you'll
i
Excitement Needed
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"CAP" STUBBS "Cap" Knows -:- .:- -:- -:- -:- -:- By EDWINA
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Cincinnati Tlmos Star
A literary dlscubslon is pulledfOft,
In tho front-lino trenches during a
grenade attack.
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AUTERnOBl LE. AIM A PUNCH, W
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HUW DUIM; AN' "
TEAM ENGINE AN'A
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IF ALL I CIT.? IS A NEW
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IAN' A TICTURE 1? OOA,
ILL HNOW TrltY
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Sriine. Bulletin'
"If e 'ad some bread we'd bo al)'
rlnlit." '
"Ye-es. And If we 'ad some 'aVn vf '-jf!
rould 'ave 'am an' eggsr-lf wo"'a'd i
some eggs."
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