Evening public ledger. (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, February 06, 1917, Night Extra, Page 8, Image 8

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EVENING LEDGER-PHIEADEIffHlA,, TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 6, 1917
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PUBLIC LEDGER COMPANY
'; crrnua . k. cunns, rnn!T
irlea II. I,uaington. vice yresiaenii jom
ftln Secretary and Treasurer! l'hlllp B.
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m, jonn u. Williams, jonn .1. ojiuiv.i. .
Daisy; Director.
wnrrnniAt. no Ann
vi Cttj II. K. Curtis, Chairman.
IV . YfllALBV Editor
M.C. UAUTIM...acnrl Iluslnsss Manager
ft? - published dally at rcBLia Limbs llulldlns:.
jnavpvnavnco Dqusrc, iiiiiwut.,......
m.CNTiiL....Sroad and Chestnut fttrrft
aktio Cltx Prtti-Unlon JI11II1llr.it
r ToiK. ..... SOO Metrowman Tower
IV -,vfc. Lotll.. ,,..,. .400 0ob-)rmorm IlulMlnit
It '-' CklOAOO. 1202 Tribune nulldlng
,'-TAiniNnTON Ilciuu ...MgM Huliqing
4.!BHLin llrjiKAU 00 Krledilchstrasim
S' tbjiDOM Uciead Marconi House, Btranil
y Pitu iit?itf at! IIua Louis to (Irani!
fA BUIlSCnilTION TE11MS
The Ktciliig Ijmisn It served tn subscribers
' tn lhtljl!rhl. and surrountllnc towns nt tno
rate of twelve (IS) cent per week, payable
to the carrier. . . . . . ,
. I)r mall to point" outside of J'hllmlsllhla. In
the United States, Canada or United Btsles l
eeelone. postago free, fifty (601 cents per
roonth. Six ($0) dollars -per year, payable In
advance. .... ,
To all foreign countries one (11) dollar per
month.
NOTlrn Jtiihfrlhrf" wishing address changed
' k must give old as well a new nddress.
W a, BELL. 1000 WALNUT KEYSTONE, MAIN J000
eT Addresn alt communications in V.venlnu
Ltdocr, Independent Square. Philadelphia.
AT tnr.
SECOMI-i
CLASS MU IIATTKII.
TUB AVEUAOB NET PAID DAILY Cin.
CULATIOM OF THE EVENING) Lr.DUKfl
FOR RECKMIIKR WAS 110.810
1'hlUdrlplila. Tund.r. 1'cbruiry 6. 11J.
' Tho German crisis has blanketed
tho petty Brumbaugh-Penroso flKht so
completely that It la now attracting tho
attention which It merits. ,
Kx-Ambassador Hemstorff Is to bo
treated with all tho courtesIeH. Tho Stato
Department has prepared to ask tho Drlt
Uh to permit him to ko homo.
Evidently old Arctomys Jlonax
knows his business, but wo don't want tho
wholo six weeks of winter to which ho
has condemned us squeezed Into three
or four days. Spread It out Mr. A. M.l
.
Mr. Bryan Is In WashlnRton, where
lie Bays ho Is "at tho I'rcBldent'.s com
mand" If ho wishes to consult him. Tho
ether Cuban war colonel has postponed
bis trip to the warm seas In order to
await In Oyster Bay tho turn of events.
r There Is a very wldo and comprc-
' henslvo field for thought In that part of
, ewe-President Taft's speech In tho Brook
lyn Academy of Music when ho asked:
"What would bo our situation today If
the English navy were not between us
and Germany?" Is there any loyal Amer
ican who has the least doubt as to what
It would be?
"Barney" Baruch let tho "leak"
committee understand pretty clearly that
bo based his stock market operations not
en rumors, but on tho facts which form
tho basis of rumors. He might havo told
the commttteo that Wall Street Is strewn
with the wrecks of men who have tried
to get rich on a tip which somebody' elso
has given them.
There Is something humorous In
tho haste with which tjio Senate Judiciary
Committee has made a favorable report
on attorney General Gregory's seventeen
bills. Intended to equip tho Government
' for protecting its neutrality nt a time
when tho rieutrallty of the United States
may bo changed into belligerency at any
moment.
Tho President did not need the
assurance of the chairman of tho Sennto
Finance Committee that nil tho funds
ifecessary would bo placed at his dis
posal. Congress can bo trusted to respond
to tho undoubted sentiment of tho nation
rr - ------
it, Ww! -l
b,1 that It co-operate with tho Executtvo to
the fullest extent, and voto whatever
-. A .... .... t,- -.. j .- ...
bVt siuiii suuy uu icijuiieu iu prepare us vu
pjt" meet the crisis and to seo It through to
3?-' t UIQ CI1U.
Conditions undoubtedly Justify tho
President's shipping proclamation. A
' national emergency oxlsts which makes It
Imperative that overy Bhlp under Amor
lean registry shall be and remain nt tho
disposal of the American people. If they
are to bo chartered by others than tho
cwners they must bo chartered for tho
$v service euner oi me uovernment or or
?!''., American trade. Wo are still neutral.
Wy-V The ships which are carrvlnjr a larce nart
Ifti c' our fore'Bn tra16 belong to tho bellig
erents ana are iiaoie to aitacK at sea
' under- the new German proclamation. Wo
$ust carry what wo can In our own
rj,)eips xor our own protection, ana in the
'vent of war we must have our own shin.
jpT ?B at our own disposal. Tho President
fcrioruinaieiy empowered by speclllc law
Vit-f (j-.vv- Mtuuun tiiiiuoia uu iuvs
way.
Tlvfinta nrs mnvlnir an ftiof lie
i' Tenmmeilt on conditions nt 12 nVlnr-k mnv
hi out of date at 3. But thoro wero somo
Slcatlons when this was written that
Germany was attempting to modify her
Pf ubmarlno order and practice to meet tho
imiui.'iuB auu ma imn oi ine neutrals.
ttin lina mlMtA Mtfantu-twn A.aIju.
' , niiniin yu iiiui ncu vupiureu on, snips
jA mnM by the raiders. She observed all the
fcjraittilremenrji ot International law In de-
Dying ine jiousaioma. une nas modi
fier blockade zone In tho North Sea
' the relief of Holland. And she has an-
d that all her ships' will have re-
Larders by March 6 which will nro.
neutral shipping in all Us rlchta nn
tie sea. If 'she shows a decent respect
uu pinions oi manKinu it may be
V'Tj , '. ;M." wwro m pass
i iraa otuhs lyunoui naving to fire
cither tho whole work shall cease or tho
American commission shall continue to
direct It as heretofore." Ten million help
less persons In Belgium and northern
Trance riwnlt tho decision. Spain Is nego
ttattng with Germany to open a lano of
safoty for the rollcf ships. In tho words
of tho Belgian Belief Commission: "No
mnttpr what contingency arises
Americans must not desert tho causo
which has boon so peculiarly their own,
nnd wo must glvo our overy support to
somo other neutral body If we should bo
forced to retire from administration of tho
relief."
ECONOMIZE AND PREPARE
rpiIEUH Is no call for us to lose our
heads, but wo should economize and
prepare nt onco In order that wo may bo
ready for nny emergency.
It took England nnd Franco two years
to adjust themselves to modern war con
ditions. Kussla lias not learned tho'trlck
yet. l"or thirty months tho reports of
western Europe's growing clllclency and
struggle against muddlers havo been an
open lesson for tho wholo noutral world
and tho lltcrnturo of actual modern war
would nil a library.
Wo should profit by this vast storo of
human expciionco. It would bo folly to
go through tho wholo wretched business
of in :ddlo for ourselves through nny vain
presumption that American methods nro
superior to those of Uurope. Europeans,
through mi untold ngony that has de
stroyed in- wrecked between twcnty-flvo
and forty million lives, havo learned to
abstain from luxuries, to economize In
comforts, to bo frugal even of necessi
ties. Tho average man and woman wilt
not bo called upon for ndvlco about mili
tary or naval preparedness. Theirs Is"
now a spiritual and moral duty, a right
frame of mind. That duty Is to prepare,
ns If for tlio worst, by economy.
Our food Is for tho soldiers and sailors
of the Allies ns well as for our own.
What we nro protesting ugalnst they nre
fighting ntrnlnnt. In so far as their suc
cess accomplishes tho Justlco which our
soldiers and sailors nro arming to uphold,
their success Is our success. While wo
uro not of tho Allies we nro with tho
Allies. AVo ore not of them for tho re
drawing of tho map of Europe, but wo
nro with them In so far as they are for
tho rights of humanity which they arid
wo demand. Wo should rebuke flippancy
and the belittling of tho seriousness of
our lost Isolation. Wo should curb un
bridled pleasure-seeking. Wo should
economize and prepare.
THOSE ALIEN LAND LAWS
TT IS about tlmo tho National Govern---
ment let those western States which
are periodically attempting to pass land
laws In apparent contravention of Inter
national treaties understand that they aro
trespassing on ground where they havo
no' business.
Treaties nro tho supremo law of the
land, nnd, In tho language of thc Federal
Constitution, "tho Judges In every State
shall bo bound thereby, anything In the
constitution or laws of any State to the
contrary notwithstanding."
It Is ulso about tlmo Japan discovered
that tho Government In Washington Is
supremo and can bo trusted to secure
tho protection of tho Japanese In all their
treaty rights regardless of tho acts of any
of the States. The California land laws
specifically safegunrd tho treaty rights
of aliens, though that safeguard was not
nece33nry. California might as well have
passed n law reserving to tho National
Government tho right to declaro war.
Tho proposed changes in tho land laws of
Idaho nnd Oregon, which havo been aban
doned nt the request of tho State De
partment, would havo had no effect upon
treaties, for tho Stato courts would have
been compelled to declare them Invalid so
far as they ran contrary to International
agreements.
The Nntlonnl Government Is supremo
In such matters, and wo should like to
see It assort Its supremacy In no uncer
tain terms, whllo It Informs tho States
that they uro attempting to legislate on
mnttcrs over which they havo no Juris
diction. "STARVING ENGLAND"
"OTAUVING ENGLAND" Is tho slogan
that comes handiest to the Gorman
official mind In explaining Us now sub
marine policy, and for home consump
tion It Is probably ns good as any to
Justify It to a desperato populace. But
does the German Government really bo
llovo it can starve England, and, If not,
what military ndvuntage does It expect
to accomplish?
Two contradictory threats havo como
from Germany. Ono Is that England
will bo starved In thirty days. The other
Is that "Germany will sink a million tons
a month ot England's cloven or twelve
million tons." So Borne Germans think
England can bo starved in a month and
others in a year. Lloyd's puts, tho Brit
ish mercantile fleet at twenty million tons,
eo that tho second estimate must be,
stretched to nearly two years. And
this Is not counting tho neutral merchant
fleets .which will be convoyed or other
wise protected by armed force, if neces
sary. Nearly a week of 'that ominous
"thirty days." of ruthlessness has passed
without increased hardships for Britain.
Even Germans are realizing the folly of
blind confidence. Captain Perslus, naval
odltqr of tho Berlin Tageblatt, warning
his Readers against too optimtstio ex
pectations ot what the XT-boats can ac
complish. What the U-boats are expected to do
is to decrease France and Italy's supply
of food and coal and Russia's supply of
munitions rather than to starve' Eng
land. These are more attainable objects.
But they can boi accomplished only by
such measures In tho Atlantic) ai would
niuiure-Amerlca Into war. and that triune
I threJaAsfl'trf a;,many,tA!.
HOW WAR COMES
HOME TO A MAN
Wcarincs3 With tho Long Story
of Tragedy Disappears When
American Rights Aro
Challenged
By ROBERT HILDRETII
WHKN did tho European war begin? Ask
something easy. Ask "How old Is
Ann?" or something llko that. I doubt
not tho European war began about tho be-
ginning of time, for do wo not lienr that
evolution, Including civilization, is n process
of creative synthesis, and that ench event
and development In tho process Is condi
tioned by precedent facts nnd factors? In
this seiiKo tho world turmoil Is n product
of conditions lost to present view In those
dim, forgotten periods whereof tho memory
of man runneth not to the. contrnry. t
Tho actual history of the war, more com
prehensibly, covers a good deal . Icbs than
threo years long years, however, years so
long that tho world has aged a century or
two slnco tho middle nt 1011; years so
long Hint the mind of tho Individual must
strain and struggle to icrall Its own ic
actlons nnd experienced during tlio sum
mer nnd autumn of that momentous year.
So changed Is the world, so changed Is
thought itself, Hint we nro all different peo
plo from tho peoplo wo wero In 1012, to
say nothing of what wo were, Intellectually
and morally, In 19111.
1 know Hint I myself havo changed,
grown old, In many wnys ways deter
mined by this war on the other side of the
ocean, t havo even become fo old-feeling
Hint I have now tho reminiscent mood char
acteristic of old men without Its Joyous
ness. 1 seem to havo lived n long time, t
seem to havo seen a very great deal of life,
of world history. I hao a foiiho of tired
ness not ennui, Indeed, but Just plain
world -wcnrlnrps, or rather weariness f
what now has nn awful sninciiess. All
this seeing and feeling, all this experienc
ing, though I nln but one nf many humble
citizen-! of America, seems to lmo drained
my emotional reservoirs, at least so far
as war news Is concerned leveled my emo
tional responsiveness almost to tlio plane
of dendness. Ko. In my ll.dlffcrcnee, 1 feel
old, I look back.
Awnkcncd by n Blow
But no. It Is not true, nflcr nil, that I
havo lost my responsiveness to world
events. Of a sudden enino the German slap
In tho face of my country. Then came
the announcement that DernstorfC had been
handed his lint, nnd that I'tcsldeut Wilson,
America's President, had gono before Con
gress, I thrilled once more. World-tired
nnd wnr-tlred an I was, 1 awoke, suddenly,
fully. I got the news on the street, from
an "extra." I discussed It with a perfect
strnnger, while we wnlted for a car As
I walked homnvard from tho car. my pace
was rapid, excited. I found myself sing
ing, whether nudlhly or not 1 en mint tell,
"The Stnr-Spangled Itanner" anil "My
Country. 'TIs of Thee." It may have been
sentlmentnl, but I can't help that and I
don't care. Lively sentiment,, that : never
theless, I feel old. 1 look back, with the
critical attitudo Hint old men possess. I
review events, I review my own experi
ence. "The Great War" It Is called, thlfl fearful
conflict In Europe. Say, rather, the Little
War. It Is man's littleness that brought It
on. that makes Its continuation possible.
When man Is great enough thcro will bo no
wars. Wnr is contemptible. It Is Illogical.
Such Is my nttltudc, philosophically; such.
In other words, was my attitudo at tho be
ginning of tho European war.
I havo noticed that men, talking of In
ternational relations, mako frequent ute
of tho personal analogy. They comparo
national motives nnd national behavior with
Individual personal motives nnd behavior.
1 havo thought that tho analogy was rather
wenk, almost mennlngless. Not until very
recently (you know tho time It was last
week) did I realizo tho power of tho per
sonal element In matters of this Bort. My
country Is not an abstraction. It Is sot
either a collection of my fellow men. My
country Is I, very truly, very deeply. So
nt last I find somo use for the personal
analogy. If I had been mortally offended,
directly or Indirectly, If I had been chal
lenged to defend a causo which all my being
Justllled, 1 should 'doubtless Jump off my
philosophical perch, without hesitation,
without uompunctlqn, nnd engngo n a con
temptible, degrading, disgusting, Illogical
street light. Virtually, pragmatically tho
European wnr looms up big nnd bright as
a moral necessity, a war of righteousness.
It is a llttlo war, maybe, but also a gieat
wnr. When I nchleved a philosophy of tlio
moro or less "pure" variety. 1 thought I
had grown old and wise ; but now that the
war has really nged me, I am become
practical. I seo that morality, national ns
well as personal, Is a question of circum
stances nnd not of theory and abstract
rules. No man or nation can morally af
ford to bo a victim of "pure" morality.
When War Wns "Impossible"
All this autobiography Is "of recent days.
My first recollection of tho wnr takes mo
back to tho last week In July, 1914. It
wns after tho assassination of tho Arch
duke what-was-hls-name. and before nny
of tho numerous declarations of wnr. I was
riding on an elevated train in New York
city, hanging to a strap with ono hand nnd
holding n morning newspaper In the other.
My friend llrlggs and I wero on our way to
tho olllco and tho day's work. Wo spoko
of tho prospect of war. I said thcro wasn't
going to bo any war. I forget my argu
ments. They don't matter, itnyhow. I re
member only that 1 was emphatic, certain
I remember that war was unthinkable.
Only a few events iu my mental history
of tho war stand out. I remember my early
flitercst In maps. In lnllltnry strntecv. In
new methods of warfare the neroplanl-, tho
submarine. I remember my Interest In tho
slang of the trenches and Journalism at tho
front. 1 remember the Lusltanla and tho
President's historic address nt Philadelphia.
I remember a number of conversations with
my wlfo over tho prospect of America's be
ing drawn Into tho conflict. AH theso things
now seem of tho very distant past, things
of long ago, Only my Interest In tho higher
cost of living has persisted and grown,
Of late until last week I havo been
thinking mostly of other matters knowing
llttlo of tho wnr except that It wns still go
ing on. Then somebody urged that I read
Wells's book, "Mr. Hrltllng Sees It
Through." I followed thn suggestion In
about the same spirit as If It had been any
other book 'Tho Way of All Flesh." for
Instance. My Interest wns not In tho war.
It wns In Wells, In modern llteraturo and
even In literature as nflcctcd by tho war.
There wns another, source of Interest. A
professor of psychology had told me that
the psychology of the book, or in tho book,
was marvelous, that "Mr. ' Brltllng" was
ono of the best of books on tho psychology
of war time. So I read "Mr. Hrltllng." I
was rending "Mr. Brltllng" when tho Ger
mans slapped the face of my country
when they once more slapped tho facer of
humanity. I don't say that "Mr. Brltllng" Is
"a good book," as I say that nbout other
books. I only say that It Is part of me,
part of my seeing and feeling In this time
oi times.
Such are a few of, my recollections of -this
war. But now I live In the present, despite
this reminiscent mood; nor fear what the
future may bring forth. When a deed Is
done for freedom and for right. In the pres
ent, let the future take care of itself.
A MOTOR RACE IN 1895
Twenty-two years ago a few enthuslasllo
"horseless carriage" manufactured decided
that the tlmo was ripe for a race. As we
look back at It now the contest was a
mechanical Jest The vehicles started
bravely and then stopped lamely, while their
drlTers made repairs. One Inventor folr
lowed nis mecnanicai wonder, with a, team
, aurava. ino winner or.;(ne rape had
iaiawaaaitfca ' at .',-. .F,
Ei?zAS?--'. ' -
THE VOICE OF
THE PEOPLE
Conduct of the Firemen at the
Market Street Fire White
House Pickets ' Con
demned Thh Unmrlmcuf tree tn alt readers tifco
wish to ciiiremt thttr opinions on tuoSectf nf
current interest. It i ml open forum, nnd the
Kienlng Lcdqer nouiilr) no rcsnonsibllltv for
the vleu's of il rorrt-iioicnls. Letters ntu-tt
be stoned bu the nanf and address of the
urtter, tiot necessarilu tor publication, but as a
auarantcc of uood faith.
EFFICIENCY AT SATURDAY'S FIRE
To the Editor of the Evening Ledger:
Sir It Is to be hoped that the Finance
Committee of Councils and other city
officials wero Included In tho thousands of
spectators who witnessed tho destruction of
the Glmbel warehouses. It might help In
making them look with more favor on the
firemen's demands. I happened to be In close
proximity to the Arc nnd was astounded nt
Its rapid advance. To the thousands of
spectators who quickly gathered it looked,
In our inexperience, as if any effort to
master the flames was useless and wasteful.
There was a force of men, however, who
thought otherwise Theso gentlemen kept
arriving on tho scene In close continuity,
until quite a number were on the ground.
By some means or otner, not casuy discern
ible to the onlookers, tho nppnratus, the
lone lines of hose, nnd tho few hundred
men were nil working togetner in narmony,
nnd with nn effectiveness that soon resulted
lit the fire being put "under control."
Should not a Fpectncle llko this elicit tho
hearty co-operation of all our citizens In
furthering tho Interests of our flre-flghtlng
forea for better conditions?
As I stood there, nlong with mnny of my
nenr neighbors bewildered and helpless, not
knowing. In fnct, hnlf expecting, our own
property wns doomed ns further sacrifice to
the flro god, I commenced to think how nice
It was for these brawn fellows, habited In
their unsightly rubber boots and conts and
leather helmets, to come to the rescue, and
do my work nnd Bne my property from
destruction while 1 hnd to do nothing
but look on,
Can wo quiet our, consciences by saying
that theso "men with the ladder nnd the
hoso" deliberately choose this profession
and that wo pay them for It? Well, per
haps wo may, If we, while thus thinking,
are sure that they are well paid.
OLIVER McKNiaHT.
Philadelphia, February 5.
DISPLAY THE FLAG
To the Editor of the Evening Ledger:
'Sir May I suggest that In this crisis all
householders In this great city of Phila
delphia display the Stars and Stripes to
show they aro with the President, bo It
war or pence. Let us put aside our politi
cal views and place our country first, last
and forever.
THOMAS VINCENT McHALE.
Tho Racquet Club, February 5.
MR. ATKINSON' EXPLAINS
To the Editor of the Evening Ledger;
Sir Upon being tailed on phone the other
evening by a reporter In reference to a
published statement said to have been made
by llyerson W. Jennings, of his and my
willingness to join the women sentinels In
front of the White House, my reply briefly
was, and, as the reporter states, "pleasantly,
nothing doing" : and now I will explain the
meaning ot my words by stating that. In
my opinion, woman suffrage will not be
advanced by such an exhibition of militancy
on the part of the women of the Congres
sional Union, It Is so like, what we read
ot the doings of the English militants be
fore the war that It affects the minds of
American men unfavorably.
The White House Is the private abode
of the President, who Is the people's servant,
placed there by their mandate, and no
group of men or of women, no matter how
respectable or Innocent of any evil purpose,
hu a moral rlsht to place sentinels In front
ot his home to annoy him, or for any other
M.mnum than in nrotacc mm. Anv nnrh m.
position upon the 'Chief Magistrate reflects
iw.r? KSS'iiSa l?L$F':m
.'AI- -TUA. -l-.IllSSSBSlSMISlHaLE. -.TLBi r -Tl -.A." - I I -nn liu J " J.-.
--'.' --wm-T-,-.- k' 'Ti- -,- iim-
iSsasssSsSs'SSSaeaS-Sa
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THE HOT COAL
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I ,' .'--V&Wi. tf&U)f ) ,vr
r jmcpr &
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jCt H
-HSP-
!.-X-'.,:-5fiE---"- Jf-jr""
Ai?r-jCA7.'icrt.-ir---!r- Mr -y
i&z&r&c,'-
or without banners, to picket my home
unless invited to do so. 1 know of no per
son but would bo angered nt such Intrusion
upon tho prlvncy of his or her home. Tho
sentinels themselves, and tho persons who
put up tho money to equip and pay them,
would not llko It any better than tho rest
of us.
Let mo nsk, as a friend of thoso who
nro financing nnd mothering this enterprise,
and tho sei-'inels who nre taking an active
part In It, to forbear, and, If need be, try
somo less untoward method, less spectacu
lar, nnd less likely to give offense.
WILMEIt ATKINSON.
President Pennsylvania Men's League for
Woman Suffrage.
Philadelphia, February 3.
PLURAL VOTING NOT A REMEDY
To the Editor of the Evening Ledger:
Sir In regard to tho suggestion of mu
nicipal, reformers who bellevo that the
standard of city government would be
raised If tho business men who live and
voto In tho suburbs wero permitted to
voto In the city as well, I do not think
such methods of voting would raise tho
city government to nny notlccnblo degreo
because it would havo a tendency to lower
rather than raise tho standard.
It would afford excellent opportunities for
"election repeaters," tho very tiling which
wo have made special efforts to prevent.
AVo should remember thnt wo havo a very
good system of voting, and it should be
continued until a better one can bo de
vised. OSCAlt E. BODDIE.
Atlantic City. N. J., February D,
ENCOURAGEMENT
The youth wns In love, nnd ho mndo us all
miuw ll ;
He hnd such a far-away look In his eyes.
Ho threatened to bud ns nn amateur poet
Ho uttered sighs!
So I said: "Llttlo man, If you'ro smitten
with Mabel,
Go tell her the secret you have to Im
part." But ho groaned: "Oh! I fear I shall never
be ablo
To win her heart."
Then 1 gnvo hint good cheer, nnd Insisted
upon It
As only clllclency experts can do;,
"That's mmsensc." I said to him. "Others
havo dono It,
So why not you?"
Cleveland Plain Dealer,
AH Points of the Compass
Rubaiyat of a Commuter
XLIX
My Wlfo and I w,cre Journeying last Spring
To Willow Drove, where Vaudevlltlans sing.
A Fnlry In a Shirtwaist winked nt me.
My Wife said, "My! but sho's tho Sassy
Thing!"
Old Doc Evans, tho How-to-Keep-Well
savant of (he Chicago Tribune, says
"heating cream to ISO degrees (sixty de
grees short of the boiling temperature) will
kill all the bacteria In it." If the doc
tor can mako water or cream boll 'at a
temperature of 210 degrees ho's got old
man Fahrenheit skinned forty ways and
should bo able to save considerable, coal
bills In numerous steam plants.
We were discussing the warlike moves
made on Saturday whten tho President
made us Anally realize that we nre, after
all, real Americans. Iloy F.-cck, the cele
brated cadlllacquer, spoke:
"Do you know where the Welsh moun
tains are?" he asked.
We admitted our Ignorance ot their ex
act whereabouts.
"Nobody knows, except a few of us." he
said. "Confidentially, I'll tell you. They
are Up In Eastern Pennsylvania, over
against Pike county. Nobody lives 'there
but a couple ot rabbits. It there Is going,
to be a war, Little Rqy Is going to pack
his grip, and he Is going right up therel
None of your1 submarines are going to tor
pedo him. If we stay up here on the
eleventh floor, of the du Pont Building
we are liable to get shot- If we Jump
out tho window we'll bust ourselves all to
pieces. No, sir. Little- Itoy Is going un
and play with the rabbits." "
i
Plppa wtlnae, "All's wl with the
At XBlliJ ' '"-itiniilsiii l-
What Do You Know?
Queries of central Merest will 69 answered
tn this column. Ten questions, the answers to
which every well-informed person should know,
aro askid dalty.
QUIZ
Mlmt nnd where Is Guantoimmo?
In'rfte wnr Is 'declared, who wonld com-
iniind the American force?
What Is cruiser warfare?
How In "ruthlffn" pronounced?
Compare the areas and populations of An-
norm and nan .iinnno, ine amauri
countries In the world.
Who Is lo Sweeney?
What I nn "overt act." mentioned In Tretl-
dent Wilson's notification of severance ot
diplomatic relations with (Sermanr?
Who nre the "Yarrondale prisoners"?
Who nre the Herman nnd Auntro-IIuntarUn
Consuls In rhltudeIphla-7
What nrt school Is the oldest In America?
10,
Answers to Yesterday's Quiz
There are nbout 112,000 men In the United
States regular nrrar.
Captain ltoliert Lee Bussell Is commandant
ot the Philadelphia Navy Yard.
Colonel ltoliert Montgomery Is commandant
ot the Fronkford Arsenal.
The larsest postofllce rarace tn the country
Is on Woodland avenue between Jtarty
thlrd nnd iortr-dftli streets.
The United Htates Supreme Court Is com
posed of Chief Justice White nnd Asso
ciate Justices McKenna, Holmes, Day,
Vnn Devunter, l'ltney, MeRernolds, Dran
dels nnd Clnrke.
Zu was n Mrd-llke storm cod of Uabrlonlan
mythology.
Adobe Is clay-like soil mixed with water and
straw (usually stable refuse), put In
wooden molds and baked by the sun.
The Kllen Wilson Memorial Home are
erected In Washington for vtorklngmen In
memory of the President's first .wife.
An American woman who marries a for
eigner assumes the nationality of her
husband.
"This much Is certain" Is Incorrect, ns
'this" Is not an adrrrbi.lt should be
"thus much, etc."
Automobile Patents
MOBILE (a) If Is Impossible to say
how Inany automobiles aro made In this
country under patents held In Europe. The
patent department of tho National Auto
mobilo Chamber of Commerce furnishes the
Information that there aro tens of thou
sands -of unexpired United States patents
Which purport to relate to the automobile
and that It would require an enormous In
vestigation ot each of these patents before
It Could bo determined how many cars are
being mado under foreign-owned patents,
(b) The F. I. A.T. car la an American-made
car. The company Is controlled by Italian
Interests and manufactures Its cars under
Italian patent rights. Tho letters stand for
Fabbrlcn Itallana Automoblll Torino, or
Italian automobile factory nt Turin.
Munitions Tax:
B. C. T. The munition manufacturers'
tax will end "one year after the termina
tion of the present European war, which
shall bo evidenced by the proclamation of
the President ot the United States declar
ing such war to have ended."
South American Trade
T. n. Detailed Information on trade re
lations with South American countries may
be obtained from Superintendent Poe, of
the Bureau of Foreign and pomeatlc Com
merce, Philadelphia Chamber of Commerce.'
WIdener Building.
Capo Horn
II. C. S. Cape Horn Is at the southern
extremity ot South America.
Divorce Laws
J, L. South Carolina has no divorce
law.
SAM LOYD'S PUZZLE '
' ns
MIL AND MHS. NEWLYWED were
told by the furniture dealer that his
terms were ?5 cash and $5 per month
until the goods were paid for, but In
case they wished to pay spot, cash, $10
would be thrown off, making the articles
cost only ,B. They accepted the In
stallment proposition, so who can tell
what Interest they paid for the use of
the money?
&jrii.L
jfla-,J.-..
Tom Daly's Column
McAronl Ballads
hXXlll
DA. FIXn ITALIAN HAND
Joe Ucasapalcna can't u-rifo icc otcni
name, 2
But he can write othra thcengt, juttafi
An' mcfibo you, too, f,
navforc ho ccs through, 3
Wccll read w'at he's xorolo an' be ba7
itat he came.
Voit ace, cct ces vcrra good thecng fort
decs Joe
lie com' to decs countra to long time ago V-
grant laws i
Dat viak' you- knoto rcadln' an' twins'!
bayca'Jad J
Da 'Mcrican story he's makln' today
i:cs justa wrote down ecn a deeffercM
way.
VhT ricasaa, -my frand, I'll caplatn, tt
ZUIt 11UU1
You cvva been up ecn Conne'Uca State
An' ace doae ole farms dot's so fun
weetha stone
Dat uoi' cvra farmer ecs Icauln nlone, '
naycausc acy ain't it jor nobody to ovnt
"Wat, Joe he ces luy wan a' dem lajfo
year,
An' now he ces doln' som' writln' up deft-S
An' even hecs flrsta year's work was is1
fjood
'He sure ces da. talk for da whole ncljX.fl
uurnvvui m
You no ondrasland? Ol my frand, yon ere 1
41010
JVal, ha wcell esplaln cct. Eo sp,caka dif
Joe:
"I write weeth no pen, hut I taka -my hot
An' I use cct so wal weeth my strongt
right han'
Dat I icrltc, ecn Italian, all over dees htt'l
ah na ircccKS i nave icarnea, all at
ihecngs dat I know
Dat wcell charma. da plants an' jus' walks if
acm growl
But Ol here now ces com' do mos' won..
draful thccfigt
Dough I write on my fields ecn (alias $
ecn sprccng,
You can read, ecn- da summer, all overi
my tan
Boocha message for all ecn good, plain
'Jlfcricaii,
Even dose dat mak' laws mcVbe tnlsJin
iHr7fiefrH' f" S
... f
Joe Gcssapalcna can't write hecs own
name,
But he can write othra thecngs, juata it
same;
An' mcbhc you, too,
Bailforc ho ces ihrnunh.
4
Wcell read w'at he's wrote an' be glai
dat lie came.
IN SPITE of our fine sermon (n
above) which was first fired at tho hetalj
of "W. J. Bryan soveral years ago, thai
Immigration bill, with Its wretched llt-i
erncy test, yesterday beenmo a I&w.'l
Parlous times! parlous times I ,1?
LOCAL ITEMS
Dave Harrows: anrl hln hrntliAT. ilia f!e.J
mantown florfsts, have been entertaining f
crippled snowbird nil winter. It broke Its r-i
wing somehow last fall, but managed Wf'l
hop Into tho hospitable hothouse, where It til
was out of cat-reach and where generoukfl
dally offerings of crumbs have helped It tsFa
Keep Douy ana song together. 1
Tho Heading Terminal has put ud a niw?
mural painting In tho clearstory over the!
n.,.l ..wit .. Ikfn !,.. .,a....6 T,'.. .. uu.1. 'i
Tho 'four-sided clock pictured In It Is mik
ing faces at a scared tourist. i.
,
Speaking of tourists. Doo Lane left forjL
Florida Sunday, and wo'ro sorry now that
wo asked htm to send us a coupla alligator!.
send us a coupla pairs alligators.
It was the scribe's palriful privilege to'.
seo a brldo and groom on Montgomery ave-.;
nue captured and maltreated by a parr -of
"friends of tho young couple." We never
felt o much llko going to war. This tort
of thing la tho acme of what George WationV
calls "gorilla (or Is It guerrilla?) humor.
And friend Buck, walking past the saloos
i
at Walnut street and Delaware avenue,
chuckled nnd called our attention to ttis
sign at the sldo entrance: 'Watch Tour
Step."
The other night
I went to tho theatre
With a lowbrow friend
And the orchestra played
I.Otli. llrniifn T.iv
And he thought It was the national anthem
Ana siooa up.
And I did, too,
Darn him. Arkansas Gazette.
And two patriotic but (If we may UJi
It) absent-minded feet reached out ex-j
ploratlvely, for the brass rail.
Famous Triplets
Thrco aces.
Threo strikes.
Three balls.
Thrco stars.
ijir.i.IPOP.
. Mlennesiy. Heefwlneandlron s well as tejj
lookandllsten might also be considered ellslDl-!
"Didja'know," neks It. C. "that thl
church visitor for the Fourth Presbyterian
Church Is Mrs. Scattergood?" ;
No, It. C, being an It. C. ourself, but, be
ing unblgotcd, we readily believe It.
Yokel brightened our morning mall wltS
mis, cnppeu rrom me Lebanon Jieport
t
NEWLYWEDS
IWore buying- your Household
Furniture Inspect my styles.
I can save you money
UNDERTAKING A RTKCIAI.TY
Embalming Free of Charge
ARNOLD FURNITURE STORE
Campbelltown. Pa.
"You may be interested In this, as lllut-i
tratlng anew the consecration of the Enri
llshman tor his tuh." writes Kl D. B. frorttv
Jamaica, Inclosjng the following from thy
Kingston Gleaner: $
Mr. Andrew Smith, for many yrl,
connected with the West End Fisheries
died somewhat suddenly on Saturdays;
last. He was able to take hls,bath in the
iiiuiiuii(r, out apparently hucuuu-!.
shortly .afterward.
' A DIO AT VB
The poet of the column
i Thinks he has a Celtic soul,
But I'll give a warrant solemn
Every TAD tnust be a pole.
A. WAKE.
DICK FRANCIS and John MaxwellM
(Dlck'sxpamo Is in caps because It haPfl
pened to be written first) played elghteaai
Holes of colt over the Merlon course 01
Saturday. There is no record of thol
scores, but both were much higher thaaj
the zero temperature that's a cia
When thev cnt imr-b tn thn clubhlX
they heard nes of the.aimbel warehoti
fire, so they- hopped Into Maxwell
lura.uiuvBiin ij mj h
H
m