opy '
. T&
EVENTN& ODEDGBIPHirADEtPHlA:, "SATURDAY, TOEY 22, 1910.
It
OK
"WILSON,
But Zapp Holds That
Once a Politician
donkeys With an Ism
It Might Just as Well
Bd an Itis foi; All the
, Good It Does
"Take William J. Bryan Ain't It
Terrible What Creeping Pac
ifism. Has Done to That Fel
ler? Ho Had Ism After Ism,
Until Now He's Got One Foot
in the Political Grave"
"I see where Wilson, Hughes nnd Roose
velt all claim they started this hers Ameri
canism business," lioula Blrsky, tho rent
estater, said to Harnett Zapp, the v.al
manufacturer.
"Well, If I was any one tf 'cm," Zapp
aid, "I'd tefienok the credit for It to any
of the others, Blrsky, because If I -would bo
a. politician, Blrsky, I wouldn't got nothing
to do mlt no lsm. Once a politician offer
a statesman starts to monkey with an Ism
like unionism, socialism, militarism odcr
Americanism, Blrsky, for all the pood It's
coin to do him, It might Just so well bo an
His like appendicitis, tonsllltls, bronchitis
oder peritonitis. Take Wlllanj J. Bryan for
Instance, and that feller has had Ism after
Ism till he's already got ono foot In a polit
ical grave. Speaking from tho standpoint
of politics, ho Is now being taken round In
a wheel chair, and when a seemingly strong
healthy feller Uko Mr. "Wilson meets him
on the street and goes home and sa s to Mp.
'Wilson at dinner 'I seon old Mr. Bryan In
' front of "the drug store this afternoon. Mom
mer. Ain't It terrible what creeping pacifi
cism has done to that feller?' Mrs. Wilson
nods and says, would he have another
plate of soup and dismisses it like that,
Blrsky, because Uttlo does she suspect that
her own husband has already got the begin
nings of acute Americanism In his system."
"Is Americanism so terrlblo as all that?"
Blrsky asked.
"It ain't quite understood as yet, Blrsky,"
Zapp replied. "The only thing they know
about It Is that It's very catching. Rooso
rclt got It first. On June 8 ho telegraphed
Senator Jackson at tho Republican Conven
tion in Chicago that he had It, and had It
good, and In the early part of June Presi
dent Wilson comes down with It In Wash
ington and later describes the symptoms to
the West Point gradgwates. He said that
when a feller has got Americanism he
utterly believes In the principles of America
and puts 'em first abovo everything, y'under
stand. No you know as well as I do,
Blrsky, how It Is when you get ahold of a
patent medicine advertisement about float
ing specks and pain In the back, Blrsky. So
noon as Hughes read about how American
Ism affepts Mr. Wilson, y'understand, he got
white to the roots of bis hair, Blrsky, which,
when Mr. Hughes gets white to tho roots of
his hair, Blrsky, the whiteness covers con
siderable territory already. Therefore, he
N
B
E FRIENDS
Witt
Coli Water
THE GIANTS THAT RULE
Sis for STEAM GIANT who runs tho railroa'ds. Treat him fairly and ho
will play fair. But beware! Do not trespass on the STEAM GIANT'S
HOME1 Tho RAILROAD TRACKS aro his! In less than seven years
25,000 little people under tho ages of ten years trespassed on the Steam Giant's
Home. They CROSSED tho RAILROAD TRACKS at points whero no person
was allowed to pass. They were KILLED! Many, many little people CLIMBED
UPON and UNDER MOVING TRAINS. "SMART" boys "JUMPED" THEM.
They, too, were TOLLED!
A is for the AUTOMOBILE GIANT. Ho is our friend if wo chooso to make
him so. Tho 'AUTOMOBILE GIANT does not really want to kill small
folks, but he belongs on tho street and ho cannot run up tho sido of a
house when folk dart quickly into his way. Keep out of his way ! NEVER TRY
TO SEE HOW NEAR YOU CAN COME TO BEING RUN OVER. Look in
BOTH DIRECTIONS beforo CROSSING n STREET. When the Automobilo
Giant is not coming cross, walking rapidly and surely!
Fi3 for the FIRE GIANT rare fine old fellow. He keeps us warm In tho
winter time and all year round he cooks the food thai makes us strong
and healthy. BUT misuse the FIRE GIANT and he will destroy that
very body that he helped to build? He lives very quietly in his box of matches.
Respect his home and no will serve you. Invade his home by using the matches
for a toy, and the slumbering FIRE GIANT, awakened in Anger, will leap up
and DESTROY you.
Eis for the ELECTRICITY GIANT the servant of mankind. He lights our
homes, our schools and our streets. He is the silent force that run3 the
street car lines-and makes It possible for us to cover miles and miles
without tiring ourselves.. The Electricity Trolley Giant tries to work safely
for you. Do your part in working safely for him. Regard the law in crossing
the street Do NOT CROSS at the LITTLE STREETS where the TROLLEYS
do NOT STOP. Go to the corner, look carefully both ways before stepping
from tho pavement Remember that tho TROLLEY GIANT CANNOT DODGE
YOU once you are in his path. PLAY SAFE AND KEEP OUT OF HIS PATH.
Tis for the TH)NK GIANT the most powerful Giant of all. The other
Giants are helpful to you only when they are directed by the THINK
GIANT. He can make you master of their service if you will but listen
to his teaching.
Yis for YOU the home of the wonderful Think Giant Y is for YOU the
most glorious thing in, th6 world a HUMAN BEING WITH A MIND!
Branch Club News
The "Rainbow Bouquet," ilia Hannah
Fotashnick'a Woodbine Rainbow branch,
baa planted 1U nam firmly In your editor's
heart, Four little girls, nannah Zuchovttz,
Natalie Bthnnan, Cecelia and Lilly Potash
nick worked their initials carefully and
beautifully out on linen and as a result
we have a monogrammed "Rainbow Bou
quet" mounted over our desk.
The "Rainbow Violet Hearts" are mak
ing preparations to give a fair. One of the
features of the day will be the selling of
candy tn heart-shaped violet-colored boxes.
Many other pleasant surprises 11 In wait
PEN AND
Drawn
fJXHf)SMlTBUDi.
JK HT-A
'JKi'aC.
HUGHES AND ROOSEVELT ALL CLAIM THEY STARTED
THIS HERE AMERICANISM BUSINESS," DECLARES LOUIS BIRSKY
By MONTAGUE
"Ho is now being taken
knew right away that not only did ho hao
Americanism, but that ho had had It for
years already, nnd on June 10 ho telegraphs
tho Republican Comentlon that he acccptoJ
the nomination but couldn't come to Chi
cago, as he had Americanism title firm, pro
tective, upbuilding policies and nlBO prob
ably ro shooting pains In tho wrists and
ankles, Iosi of appetite nnd dlzzlneqi"
".Aber without knocking socialism, y'un
derstand. It's better that a politician should
havo Americanism as socialism, because In
the whole continent of America, Zapp, there
Is only ono or two climates where the poll
ticlan mit socialism could got any rellof.
Unllko some other Invalids, a politician mlt
socialism couldn't go to a high wild locality
liko the Adirondacks, but has got to And a
low, thickly settled neighborhood to take
his socialism to, otherwise ItN fatal."
"Tou are alt twisted, Blrsky," Zapp said
"Socialism ain't a disease. It's a remedy
for a disease, and the name of tho disease
Is capitalism."
"To apolltlclan, Zapp," Blrsky said, "cap
italism ain't a dlseaso, Zapp, it's a health
In fact, Zapp, capitalism to a Senator Is
naO -
JVi
e"WS an
for the persons who are fortunate enough
to attend this branch club festival.
Eleanor Koons, of Wynnewood, has a
small but select membership In her branch
club. She does not aim to extend It until
she finds little girls who will be quite as
enthusiastic and active as are her present
members. -The Utter ar Martha Payne,
Mary Payne, Margaret Joyce and herself.
Qut PostofBce Box
Herbert Shats has a very kind little
brother. The other night Herbert had a
sore foot and was very anxious to read the
Rainbow Club news. Of course, he could
not go out to buy It himself. And brother
went all the way In the rain. We have a
sneaking suspicion that brother wanted to
See It too 1
INK - LINGS
ARSlNOBeit
AftAitlfett
JV
IE
flCwi rv
L
GLASS
around in a wheel chair."
like a chest expansion to a soldier; he
couldn't lie accepted without It New York
State In particular Is cry strict that way.
Bcforo they would let a mnn Ire a United
States Senator from Now York, Zapp, they
sound him for capitalism, and If he lets out
a hollow Bound, they pass him up. The
consequence is that for years already every
Senator from New York has had a capital
Ism of anyhow a million dollars, which If
you call such a thing a disease, Zapp, let me
know where I could cittch It, that's all."
"Noter mind, Blrsky," Zapp said, "an Ism
Is an Ism, and capitalism Is like all the
others. Tho politician or statesman which
has It may look politically healthy for a
while, but sooner or later It will get tho
most promising career, Blrsky, tho same ns
militarism will Take the ICalser, and sev
eral years ago when ho begun to hae it, he
also felt pretty good In his case, the first
symptoms was that he broko out all over In
uniforms and he got himself appointed hon
orary colonel of so many regiments, domes
tic nnd foreign, that If he wore the uniforms
In rotation, Blrsky, he didn't get round to
tho samo suit of clothes once In 25 years.
of
lews
DAVID, CLARA & LARN WRIGHT,
OCEANCITY.NJ.
STORIES OF CLODDLAND
Little Tulip Heart's Breakfast
By Farmer Smith
The Prince wore a beautiful suit of blue
and gold and had on a pair of little cloud
shoes Just like Tulip Heart's.
Prince Marmolade ran to Little Tulip
Heart and, dropping down on one knee, took
her hand and kissed It
Then they went Into the dining room and
sat down to breakfast at a great golden
table covered with a creamy cloth made of
snow spider's web with diamonds sparkling
all over It.
From her side of the table Little Tulip
Heart could look out of a great open win
dow and see the cloud children playing In
a shining garden of stars. The ground was
all golden where the stars were growing,
all of them set out In little silver flower
pots. There were big stars In bigger pots
and smaller stars In smaller pots, and then
there were teeny-weeny stars In teeny,
weeny pots.
The cloud children, all white and furry,
flew In and out among the stars, playing tag
and other games. Just beyond the garden
Tulip Heart taw a long pure white road,
and she wondered what made It so white.
"Oh, that is the Milky Way," said Prince
Marmolade. "It Is a river of milk and
cream. Just across the Milky Way Is Toy
land, where Santa Claus lives. We will go
over to visit Santa Claus very soon, after
you have learned the toy languge."
L,ltte Tulip Heart clapped her hands with
delight. And the moment she did so Gum
Drop flew In the window on a big red but
terfly. Gum Drop's brother. Lemon Drop,
and his little sister, Lolly Pop, were rlcht
behind htm, riding on yellow butterflies.
They were all tiny little people, no longer
than Tulip Heart's arm, and they all wore
green caps made of clover leaves.
They rode round and round the table
laughing, now and then drhing their but
terflies right over the fruit and Jam dishes
and scooping up some of the dainties In
their hands They did it In such a funny
way that even Prince Marmolade laughed
Tulip Heart ate ever so much sweet snow.
flakes and cream. .Charlotte Russe's brother.
Chocolate Eclair, dressed In a chocolate suit
with gold buttons, waited on the table and
whispered to Tulip Heart not to miss the
Stardust Jam. He brought her some In a
water Illy saucer and she ate it with a pearl
spoon. She had never eaten anything In
her life that she liked so much. Then there
were cloud steak and biscuits made of sun
shine and snow. Chocolate Eclair showed
her how to. dip the biscuit In golden honey,
and they were delicious. Mmmmmmm!
Ob. what wonderful life had the little
j-rjacess 'auud titun i xou will near many h
r- cV. & . ati.-'-i It: i mkl aaAN
viyir? JDK j IfSl"' 4 'p - :"-jj
Sb3lJ fegl , -j . Ik
ceauiuui uuca aoaui cer, '
It used to cost him a fortune for moth balls
alone, and when hs took off a pair of pants
he sent It round to tho tailor nnd had a V
put In the back ngatnst the time when he
was going to wear 'em again, However,
Blrsky, he soon got tired of admiration, nnd
It didn't make no difference that his wife
tried to get him to takr a fresh Interest by
saying 'Turn round nnd let me see the
back. I think that peplln effect of the
S42d Regiment Llppc Schaumburg National
Guard which you have on Is awful becom
ing to you, Popper. Why don't you wear It
again soon say, a year from next July
4th?' y'understand, It didn't do no good,
and he quick passed Into the second or
speech-making Btnge of his trouble."
"Speech making always seems to be a
symptom that a feller's got an Ism the mat
ter with him," Blrsky commented. "Al
though It's usually tho first stage of the
trouble "
"Tho first nnd only stage In somo cases,
like old Mr. Brjan, oMti ia,ino'om," Zapp
rnld, "aher with the Kaiser, ho seems to
havo got past that part of his Ism There
was a time hero about three years ago when
you couldn't pick up a paper without rend
ing how the 7Cnlscr nddrcssed tho South
Prussian, Wurtemburg and Rlieln-Pfnlz
Commercial Trao!ers' Association or some
Buch organisation about the nailed first odcr
tho three K's or something, but nowadays
tho poor feller don't open his mouth at all "
"Why should he?' Blrsky asked "If
ecry politician mlt an Ism would have his
Ism tried out on him tl.o way tho Knlser
has, Znpp, even fellers mlt socialism would
keep quiet. Take Mint speech which the
Kaiser used to get off r. few years ago about
women should attend to tho three K's
Klrchc, A'ticc'io fiiirf Kinder and leave all
other Jobs to the men frilks, and he had a
pretty good nerv v. pull It evon In them
days, when thousands of German women
was not only attcmling to tho church, the
cooking and tho children but was also at
tending to the coal mining, the farming nnd
tho street r.wceplng not to mention a few
hundred other Job uhlch In America we
consider uch hb,id olt for a native-born
citlrci Zapp that w iinnd 'cm ocr to big
greenhorns from l.urtgary nnd Poland
Aber loday yet -iIit, over In Germany
women Is runn nc '.r' street cars, the clec-
trla light plants nnd loins the hcalcr work
that tho old tellers i So and 90 ain't up to
exactly tn 'he rolling mills nnd foundiles,
Zapp, If a loyal Qormnn subject has to write
a letter to tho Kmperor and finds hlmsolf
using a word beginning mlt a K, y'under
stnnd, ho tries to think of a substltuto word
beginning with n Z or a W, so as not to
embarrass tho poor Xcblch."
"Ho should ought to bo embnrrossed,'"
Zapp said "A feller Which Is working the
way tho Kaiser worked to get every man
from 10 to GO to become a soldier, Blrsky,
should ought to flguro In nchnnco what Is
going to happen to other businesses besides
tho soldier business In enso his schemo turns
out 100 per cent successful. Also, Blrsky,
If nil tho mas from 1G to 00 Is fighting ns
soldiers and all the women Is busy mlt
churches, cooking nnd children, Blrsky, who
did he expect Is going to run the street cara
and tho electric light plants anywny?"
"Listen, Zapp, a feller mlt an Ism Is the
last ono to expect his schomo Is going to
turn out 100 per cent successful," Blrsky
said "In fact, Zapp, I give the Knlser
credit that when tho war happened and he
begun to realize what ho said and did In
tho way of militarism to bring it about,
y'understand, his feelings toward the whole
thing was: Tor the lovo of Mars, couldn't
you tako a Joke?" Yes, Zapp, all them Ism
fellers Is tho same way. When they talk
r
armer
"HOW'D YA LIKE TO BE
fVNt . kJ&&
BUPDY POYLE, OCEAM CITY.HJ.
EUGENE JONES.OCEANCTY.lU
The Question Box
Dear Farmer Smith Will you please tell
me which is the larger, the battleship Penn
sylvania or the Queen Mary?
GEORGE H. THOMA3.
y South 55th street.
The Chief Constructor of the United States
Navy gives us the following Information on
this subject;
"Your attention Is Invited to the fact that
these two vessels, while among the most for
midable vessels of their respective types In
the world, capnot themselves be compared
as they represent essentially different
classes of ships designed for absolutely dif
ferent purposes.
Battleship Battle Cnilur
Fenaiylvanla Quetn Mary
Ltnsth , ..,., 600 fct T20 feet
Ilsm 8T feet 87 (set
Displacement (normal) 81.100 ton 28.000 ton
Speed (designed) .... 21 kt. 27 kU.
BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBV F MSa 1888888888888888888888
BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBSBBbViTi? jjf aBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBl
RjHK . tf nrWHaaaaaaaaaaH
3K i- I " 1
FARMER SMITH,
Care of the EvxjfiNO Lidoes.
I wish to become a member of your
Rainbow Club. Please send me a
beautiful Rainbow Button free I arree
to DO A LITTLE KINDNESS EACH
AND EVERY DAY. SPREAD A LITTLE
SUNSHINE ALL ALONG THE WAY.
Name v ...,,.,.......,.
Address ,,,.....,,.,..,..,.,.,,,.....
Age
School attend
" i
GC
S
"They sound him
of out and out 100 per cent Americanism
odcr militarism, y'understand me, If some
thing happens whero they'o got to make
good their words, y'understand, they all
claim nn allowance of CO per cent discount
for enthusiasm."
"Sure I know," Zapp said, "ooer tho feller
mlt militarism and Americanism nin't a
marker in that respect to the feller mlt
socialism. For years already tho Mayors
of cities In Germany, Tranco, England, Aus
tria and Italy has -been sotting writers'
cramp from Blgntng permits for Socialists
to talk on stroot corners about how th(
Socialists of tho world Is going to stand
shoulder to shoulder in caso of a war,
Blrsky, and that there would bo a general
strlko and that a Socialist was a brother
even If ho would bo n German or nn Eng
lishman as tho caso may bo, Blrsky, and
when tho war breaks out, Blrsky, what hap
pens? A German Socialist shoots an English
Socialist mlt tho samo enjoyment like tho
poor feller would bo John D Rockefeller
and vlci versa, nnd as for standing shoulder
A. S7X6- SSSf 4
Smith'
S
US?"
VERA MULLBR.,NEWTOPQRABAUOH J?
ELIZABETH REIFF. OCEAN CTY.NJ
TnE
SAFETY-FIRST CONTEST
otthe
PHILADELPHIA RAPID
TRANSIT COMPANY
IS OPEN FROM NOW UNTIL
AUGUST 12
For the best STORIES, DRAW
INGS and IDEAS on HOW TO
PREVENT nnd AVOID ACCI
DENTS the following prizes will bo
given:
For Children Over 9 Years
1st Prize $10 in Gold, or Solid
Gold Medal with your name en
graved on it, or a Folding Kodak.
2d Prize Choice of Desk, Genuine
Leather Traveling Bag, Whito
Ivory Dresser Set or a Talking
Machine with Records.
3d and 4th Prizes Choice of Boy
Scout Tent, Erector Set with
Motor, Silk Sweater or Sterling
Silver Pocketbook.
5th, 6th and 7th Prizes Choice of
$5 Gold Piece or Boy's or Girl's
Watch
8th, 9th and 10th Prizes Choice of
Cameras, Boy Scout Indian or
Cowboy Suits or Sewing Case,
AND
Fourteen other prizes Choice of
Boxes of Paints, Drawing Boards.
Footballs, Basketballs, Boys' and
Girls' Books, Music Bolls and
School Cases.
For
Children of 9 Years
and
Under t
1st Prize Choice of Gold Medal,
Boy's Watch, Solid Gold Brace
let or a Beautifully Dressed Doll,
2d Prize Choice of a Tent Sliding
Board for the Backyard, Doll's
Brass Bed or an Erector Set.
3d and 4th Prizes Choice of Baby
Doll or Mechanical Boat.
5th, 6th and 7th Prizes Choice , of
Indian Suit, Cowboy's Suit Red
Cross Nurse's Outfit or Doll's
Hammock.
8th. 9th and 10th Prizes Choice of
Blackboards, Sets of Faints,
Games or Doll's Dish.es,
AND
Fourteen other prizes Choice of
Tinker Toys, Quacky Doodle
Ducks, School Bags, Books,
SEND ALL STORIES, ETC.,
TO FARMER SMTH. EVE,
NINO LEDGER, PHILA-
DELPJHA.
J
Illustrations by BRIGGS
for capitalism."
to shoulder, Blrsky, when Doctor Llcbknlcht
wanted to make good on It, ho found that It
takes anhow two Socialists to stand
shoulder to shoulder, nnd tho last I hear he
Is sitting in Jail In Germany, waiting for a
shoulder to como along."
"Well, them Socialist fellers was up
against an out-and out 100 per cent Ger
manism, Krenchtsm and Englishism, Zapp."
Blrsky said, "and they couldn't help them
selves. Tho German Socialists probably
wanted to say that In tho trouble with
Franco there was something to bo said in
faor of France, too, Zapp, aber when the
Knlser shouts: 'Germanism consists In ut
terly belloIng In tho principles of Germany
nnd putting them principles first above
everything,' y'understand, the Socialists
didn't dasst to flguro that maybe France
could also got principles. No doubt there
was plenty Gcrmnn Socialists which had
an Idco that If tho Kaiser had believed In
an In and out Instead of nn out and out Ger
manism, consisting of 80 per cent German
ism, 19 per cent Internationalism and 1 per
N
Rainbow Glut)
LEARNING TO SWIM
Dearest Children Did you ever stop to think, how wonderfully Mother
Naturo takes care of her babies ? All the animals wo can think of at this minuto
can swim EXCEPT man.
The reason of this must be that ns soon as human beings aro old enough
to swim they aro seized with FEAR, and one of tjjp most necessary things in
learning to swim is COURAGE or SELF-CONFIDENCE.
The only way to swim is to SWIM and you cannot learn on Jry land. Get
in the water, wado out a little way and SWIM towards shore. Never mind if
your head goes under; some day it will surprise you by staying ABOVE water.
First of nil, you owo it to yourself to know how to swim. Second, it is a
great pleasuro and about tho best exercise in tho world, for Bwimming exercises
you ALL OVER your wonderful body at once.
Learn to float as soon ns you can, because the time may come when you
aro tired of swimming nnd will be glad of a rest Floating rests you.
It is a bad plan to go in swimming alone. It is a bad plan to DIVE whcr
you aro not familiar with the bottom.
Como out of the water when your lips begin to look blue or your finger tips
begin to "pucker." Tho wnter will be thero when you come back for
another swim.
BE CAREFUL. FARMER SMITH,
Children's Editor.
MERCY ANNE.PERKINS
JERRY PATTON was up In her room
counting the days that had to go by till
vacation time. Just exactly 141 Jerry
frowned. She had not yet invited any ono
to spend the summer with her. That very
morning her mother had written. Again the
little girl frowned, walked over to the desk
and picked up the letter,
"Dear Jerry," It read, "you must ask
some one this week. You simply can't wait
any longer. You say that May nolle Smith
Is lota of fun, but that you're afraid I won't
like her. Well. little girl, mother will try
to like her for your sake. Now, about the
other one, Mercy Anne Perkins. You 'Bay
you're afraid the boys will laugh at her
clothes and you think mother might worry
because she wouldn't look nice" '
"Jer-ree," a shrill voice sounded In the
hall and a second later May Belle Smith,
her light hair much befrlzzed, her white
dress crowded with lace, burst Into the
room.
"Jer-ree, guess what!" she exclaimed, and,
before "Jer-ree" was given a chance to
"guess what" out came the glorious secret
"Sh-h, don't telL Stonfe's bought an auto
mobile and It's down In the barn."
"What!" exclaimed Jerry. Miss Stone had
always been severe In her criticism of auto
mobiles. ,
"Hurry up. and come onl" urged May
Belle.
"Comet Come wheref
"Out for a rider was the thrilling retort.
"I Just got tt started." May Belle did not
stop at white lies. In truth, she had Just
paid a passing chauffeur to start It for her,
"Tou." breathed Jerry. "Why, you
couldn't run It." ,
"Yes, yes, I can," pleaded May Belle. "I
rarmy uncle's car all the time and It's like
his car. Oh, hurry, please, because the
engine might stop."
Jerry began to believe that her friend
was telling the truth. Suddenly a discon
certing thought cams Into her head,"""but
what abqut Miss Stone?
"That's the grand part of It," cried May
Belle. "Stonle and Nettles went to town on
the 320. Come, Jerry, Just us, so there'll be
no one who's apt to telL"
Of late MayfUUa was very anxious to be
alone with Jerry, In a moment of weakness
the latter had told the girls about her
mother's Invitation to bring s, classmate on
her vacation camping trip. Since then May
Belle had lost no opportunity In showing
her liking for i iry at every turn.
"Let's take h'eroy Anne," said Jerry, as
she hurriedly shipped on her silk Bweater
"Oh. Jerry." pleaded May Belle. "You
don't H tna Dy roor4 aU-" Ha' Blu
had o that playing on Jerry" symp
lb!' was better than saying mean thing
stoul her friends.
cent benzo-boracld common sense, Blrsky,
a war In Europe might have been avoided,
aber because the Kaiser said; 'Whenthe
world finally discovers that Germany is In
dlvldablo, then the world will learn how
truly nnd profoundly great hhd powerful
Germany Is,' y'understand, tho Socialists
felt that It wasn't right to disagree with
their fellow Germans about It"
"Who told you tho Kaiser says such
thlnga about Germany?" Zapp demanded.
"Why, you did, didn't ou?" Blrsky re
plied. "Me? I never said no such thing," Zapp
cried Indignantly. "What you are saying
tho Knlser says about Germany was what
President Wilson says anout America."
"Well, what Is the difference oho says It
nbout wlmt7" Blrsky continued. "The re
sults would be the same anyliow, Zapp, aber
If President Wilson snys or the Kaiser says
Americanism or Germanism consists In
utterly believing In the principles of all
nntlons, Zapp, and putting them principles
first above everything, y'understand, then
that gives a couple nntlons a show to argue
nbout their principles beforo they go to war
over 'cm, because there Is German principles
which Is Just so good as American prlncl
pies, Zapp, and there Is Moxlcan principles
which ain't bo bnd neither. Furthermore,
Zapp, when Mr, Wilson Bays That he said
about America being lndlvldnble, It's Just so
easy for a wliolo nation to bo all all-wrong
as all all right"
"Tell me, Blrsky," Zapp said, "what art
you driving Into?"
"I nm driving Into this, Zapp," Blrsky
said. "If all that Stuss Is Americanism
when Mr. Wilson and Mr. Hughes says It,
what Is It when tho Kaiser says It?"
"Germanism," Zapp replied.
"Then that settles It," Blwky concluded.
"It ain't nn sm. It's nn Itls, and the sooner
Mr. Wilson nnd Mr. Hughes gets cured of tt
tho better. Am I right or wrong?"
"Over in Germany women is run
ning tho street cars."
T DOESN'T
Cost to Smile-
.T PAYS!!
AT BOARDING SCHOOL
As usual, when her heart was touched,
Jerry gave In.
And so lt was that IB minutes later th,
two little girls stepped hurriedly Into a
rather rusty-looking 1003-model machine.
The engine balked, choked at an overdose
of gasoline, then gave one bound forward
and off the travelers went.
May Belle had spoken the truth In a ceff
tain sense when she said she had run het
uncU's car. The previous summer, at hi
country place, she fiad run It Into ditches,
fences, barns and. In fact, Into anything
that was In her way. Then she had been
forbidden to touch the car,
"Isn't It grand," she said, excitedly hold
Ing on to the wheel as though It were going
to run away.
"Yes s," replied Jerry nervously. She had
been used to chauffeurs who did not seem
to aim at trees ,
On they rode for fully a, quarter of a mile.
Jerry was beginning to breathe when she
sat bolt upright Jn the car and listened!
Yes, it was a dog I Crying as though In
great pain I
"Hear that dog. May Belle T" she spoke
up. "Ho must be hurt."
"What of It?" answered her companion.
"Let's stop and see what's the matter,"
pleaded Jerry.
"We didn't hurt him." was the Teply,
May Belle was enjoying herself very much,
by this time. t
"That's no reason we shouldn't try to
help him."
Jerry was angry. The cries sounded
sgaln; fainter, of course.
"May Belle," she screamed, "stop this
car. If you don't stop, I'll Jump out"
"Jerry, If I stop It maybe I cant
start '' Then pride came to May Belle's
rescue and the thought that she must stay
friends with Jerry,
On went tho brakes and off went the
motor!
May Belle had stalled the engine! Her
heart came to a standstill. She knew she
could never start it
"You you go bunt the dog," she eald,
"and I'll turn the car around." She hoped
wildly for a. passing stranger to 'help her
out
Down the road hurried Jerry, directed to
the little path by the pitiful crlis of the dog.
With one bound she cleared the ditch,
and
Not ten feet away, on the grass, sat
Mercy Anne! Half on her lap, half on the
ground, lay a small brown dog! Careless
was she of the grass stains, careless of the
hat that lay dustily by, careless of every
thing In the world save that a little cur was
counting ca her to. relieve his pitiful suf
fering i
(To be Continued)
AJBfc- R
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