CHRISTMAS AIN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE," REMARKS ZAPP TO HIS
FRIEND, LOUIS BIRSRT, DOWN IN WASSERBAUER'S RESTAURANT
.. T ITnrmr " Snvo
OU1C, - "XWTT, JV
R rsky. spreading a
Slice of Rye Bread
With Mustard. "The
People Is Getting Too
Wise, Zapp."
fAnd Who Done It, Zapp? It
Was the Feller That Invented
the Saying: 'Do Your Christ
mas Shopping Early,'" He
Continues by Way of Ex
planation.
Itill, in n Way, It's a Good Thing
Christmas Is Mote or Less n Thine
of the Past," Zapp Replies, "Be-
cnuso When You Tried to Collect
Bill From Somebody Around
f Christmas Time Ho Would Want
Yqu to Wait."
HRISTMAS ain't what it used to
be," Barnott Zapp remarked, as
sat opposlto Louis Birsky down in
asscrbauor'a restaurant.
"Sure, I know," Birsky said, spread-
iig a slice of rye broad with mustard
is ho waited for an order of krcploch
up, with gofulltte tcbcchcs to follow.
Former times if a retail dry goods
ncern didn't got half their sales-
dies faint on 'cm every night for two
eeks boforo Christmas, their credi-
rs would como down on them and
k them to discount their bills. Now
adays if a cash girl gets a headache,
at's big already."
"It's tho same way with the liquor
usiness," Zapp agreed. "When I first
omo to Now York, it was the equiva-
onco of a broken leg to walk past a
iquor saloon for a month around
hristmas, so many loafers gets drunk
Ircady. Aber yesterday, I was speak-
to Hyman Shidlowsky, tho feller
t runs tho Shamrock Cafe, on West
treet, and ho says the only difference
ctweon Christmas and other times
dwadays is that ho's got to carry a
bigger frqo lunch. He says that in
liquor saloons, loafers don't get drunk
no more. Thoy got nervous indiges
tion from trying to finish the wholo
lunch counter before thoywould got to
order another glass ginger ale."
' Birsky nodded sadly.
. "Christmas is dying out," ho de
clared. "Tho peoplo is getting too
wise, Zapp. It used to bo that if youl
3 wanted to push your stickers
i -
Ki
Whether it was handkerchiefs, socks,
Ticcktics, oder gloves, all you had to
do was to wait till the first of Decem
ber, mark 'em up 50 per cent, over tho
regular retail price for fresh goods,
put 'em in red paper boxes, y'under
stand, and your customers practically
used blackjacks on each other to get
at the counter where the goods was
MURPHY IS SOLOIST
IN VARIED CONCERT
Replaces Local Tenor in Or
chestra's Final Program
of Year
Lambert Murnhv. the excellent tenor
.who Is to be heard here In March as ono
of the soloists In tho Mahler symphony,
was the assisting .artist with tho Phlla-
elphla Orchestra In their llnni program
f tho year 1915 nt tho Academy yesterday
rtemoon. Ho tool; the place or iNicnoias
outy, the Philadelphia tenor, who is hi,
pd sane tho "II mlo tesoro" from Mo-
art's "Don Giovanni," and "Lohengrin's
arratlve." Otherwise tho program was
previously announced.
It was In every way nn Ideal program
'or the occasion. Approaching festivities
vldently kent a number of subscribers
from their places and so deprived them
Of a beautiful and quiet Interlude In the
business of getting Christmas shopping
on: ana preparing for a. new year, rso
orchestral number was heavy and all were
dellehtflll frnm fliA "nhui'r"nvfirtlirp.
wmen began the program, to the Svend
ten "Carneval do Paris," which concluded
It, Between them stood the first sym
phony of Robert Schumann, one of the
most sheerly melodic, most happy and
delightful of his works. It was written,
43 the program reminds us, at the time
of Schumann's own greatest happiness,
and Its artless gaiety and delight In the
flow of melody, even when unsubstan
tiated by orchestral inventiveness, are
chylous.
'Indeed, if one were to find fault with
V. ' ..... w..w.. ..... . .
eo tender and so fragile a work, It would
be on the ground that "working out" Is
Carried to evtrpma ThmAa nnttA Invulv
In, themselves are repeated and reiterated
'"" io we point or staling their charm
ing freshness. However, the pleasure of
illstenlng to the orchestra at Its very best
iuuo upjor this. The winds and strings
we, as usual, particularly good. In the
arl&UOnS on nn nHfrlnnl thnmp fnm.
JLDsed and conducted by Qustav Strube.
e other choirs of the orchestra also had
' opportunity, Tmt It cannot be said
that tbey developed It to excess.
?truke.'s theme is, as he hoped.
;.", ana 11 is interesting. A sober
!. m ,tB flrst utterance, but this
spirit is a trifle too much varied before
the work, is thiough. Each of the varla-
JlOns HI Its Interest. Th "muiftnmar
lightness1' at Mnrna nt (him ln n-hlnh
Efi? , rp nnd brings cast a shlmmer
fJJJ Y.. Tr th8 theme. Is deftly handled,
tl- 2 ax, the chorale effect which
f f. obvlly Intended to be the climax
fr2fVf4,lon8' waa Ineffective. It was
GfUr rendered.
Kfvi r ? composer-conductor no the
E.i.V.1. I"" orasa instruments could
2n Pri5BiJ,ve" t0 anything like a lofty
1sEL,?p,yfc,ar tone. Mr. Strobe's or-
jv 'UtUCerv la nprtnlnlv aattihlfahnrl
the WOtJtSnnr! thn cannlna that-na Via
opoufldedlna,,, has been said, of
tbi. '" Only, somehow, In the
i 1 ... ne matter seemed to get
3iUrDll rhnliA nt nvlaa Wfia on
Uon of tig sedulous study of his
Cnap.t, tics. Certainly UU voice
WJi Umltattm 0f lightness and alen-
es 01 Vplm. IJnllka rrmnv nther
.Wh,- coae to Ignore their ln-
a aualitUs IHe knows his voice and
'fHW inOnl oalmi to show It at Its
&?
By MONTAGUE GLASS
fZ, Ra Jw f'rh- IMmM
& DUB )
displayed. Christmas silver articles
was also good sales. I seen butter
dishes go liko hot cakes, which tho
salesladies was warned not to dust
off mit feathers even, on account it
might scratch tho silver plate and
show the brass underneath. But that's
a thing of tho past now. And who
done it, Zapp? It was tho feller that
invented the saying: 'Do your Christ
mas shopping early.' "
"Who did invent it?" Zapp asked.
"I should know who invented it!"
Birsky exclaimed. "But whoever it
was, Zapp, he put a bigger crimp in
tho cheap handkerchief business than
tho feller who invented rhinitis tab
lets, because if you are doing your
Christmas shopping around tho first
of October when all them poor fcllera
that runs summer hotels and bathing
pavilions is saying to themselves:
'Now it gets warm,' Zapp, handker
chiefs for colds are the furthest from
your thoughts. Also children whoso
mothers do their Christmas shopping
si Soptcmber is apt to get school sup
plies instead of sleighs, because a
shopper ain't got no imagination,
Zapp. She buys what's in season, and
if she was doing her Christmas shop
ping as early as the Fourth of July,
y'understand, she would como homo
with fireworks."
"Say," Zapp said, flipping the fin
gers of his right hand at Birsky,
best. Thnt is why n. volco which Is
neither rotund nor powerful gavo all tho
Impression of being both. In ovcry res
istor It Is more than pleasing, and In
every exprosslon there Is ample evidence
of tho singer's Intelligence. Ho never
forces, nevor attempts to surpass. But In
his rnnge nothing less than perfection
can satisfy him. G. V. S.
Boston Opera Company
Eepeats "Mme. Butterfly"
Philadelphia has now only to hear tho
"XIadama Butterfly" production of tho
Metropolitan Opera Company and the
Behrcns Opera Club to exhaust Its possi
bilities In the way of the Pucclnl-Long-Belasco
nnrratlvn of the star-crossed lovo
of llttlo Cho-Cho-San. the trusting, trist
ful maid of Nippon, Turned from "conto"
to novelette, to play and thence to the
music-drama, which was greeted by a
fair-sized but not sufllclently numerous au
dience at tho Broad and Poplar streets
music temple, "Butterfly" never falls to
reach forthrlghtly to Its hearers.
Twice before this season the woes and
passions of the girl and the wiles and
lusts of the caddish American lieutenant
had been rehearsed in our city, with
Tamakl Mtura, the diminutive Jap prima
donna, as a "natipnal" Interpreter of the
chief role, find once at the Academy
Mrs. Hotz gave us an Ineffably lovely
singing rendition of the part In the
Operatic Society's performance. We
have only to have the photomoblle ver
sion by Theda Bara, Gerry Farrar or
some other film star, unless perchance
Our Mary of the Movies has already
revealed the cinema Cho-Cho-San.
There is little to say concerning the
performance beyond the fact that It was
of high quality. Mme, Mlura sang
with more volume than on the previous
occasions, possibly because she has
learned the exactions of American audi
toriums. Her histrlonlsm was vivid and mov
ing; never did it seem mere play-acting.
Rlccardo Martin, as Plnkerton, and
Thomas Chalmers, as Sharpless, com
pleted the principals, and Jacchla con
ducted, With a Japanese prima donna as Cho-Cho-San
and two Americans In Yankee
roles the aspect of nationality was very
literal, but exactness would have re
quired an alr.o for Susukl, the maid,
which was well sung by Elvira Leveronl,
a New England girl, while Italians Im
personated the minor Japanese roles.
W. K. M.
"Pagliacci" and "Coppelia" Tonight
Maggie Teyte. Zenatello tnd Backlanoft
will appear tonight In the ever-popular
"Pagliacci," which will be followed by
Favlovta and her ballet In Coppelia,"
1-
Public Meeting of The Uplift
The Uplift Association will hold its Jan
uary meeting at 3 p. m. tomorrow in the
Alumni rooms of the Keneseth Israel
Synagogue. Broad street and Columbia
avenue. This meeting will be open, to the
nubile. Doctor Krauskopf will administer
the pledge to, the members. Mrs, Ell
Mayer will give a violin solo, accompa
nied by Mr. Meschamp; Mrs. Pearl Ro
gasner Lorsch will render a vocal solo.
Doctor Daniels wll" speak on "Prevention
and Education," and Mrs. Harry Lo weu
berg. chairman of the State branch of
the Congressional Union, will make an
address. Greetings from the different up
town and downtown congregations will
follow,
EVENING LEDGER-PHILADELPHIA, SATURDAY, JANUARY
II nL': H9h
m. Yvmm$m
"People treated Christmas not as a holiday, but as
"storekeepers ain't allowed to sell no
more fireworks around the Fourth of
July. It's againt tho law."
"I know," Birsky continued, "and
if people couldn't shoot off firccrnckcrs
around the Fourth of July and
couldn't shop around Christmas, all
it needs is that it should bo a suspend
ed sentence for eating turkey on
Thanksgiving and the only pleasure
wo got left in America is decorating
graves on the thirtieth of Slay."
"Still, in a way, it's a good thing
that Christmas is more or less a thing
of the past," Zapp said, "because when
you tried to collect a bill from some
body around Christmas time, it didn't
make no difference if ho was retired
from business except for a 10 per
cent, interest in a bathing suit fac
tory, ho would want you to wait till
his Christmas rush was over. Also
people didn't give no orders because
it was arrtnd Christmas, Birsky, and
just becauso it was near Christmas
and they claimed thoy could use all the
monoy they could got, your creditors
wanted you to pay bills which you
hardly knew you owed on account of
not receiving the second monthly
statement yet. Furthermore, if you
owned a tenement house, you'd got
difficulty collecting tho November
rent because the tenants said it was so
noar Christmas, and that's the way it
went, Birsky. People treated Christ-
MRS. C.JUDS0N FRIEND
OF HOMELESS BABIES
Physician's Wife Rears Chubby
Younirster and Plans to
Help More
Every baby should have a good chance
to get on ln the world. This Is the policy
of Mrs. Charles E. Judson, of 1003 Spruce
street, who carries out her theories on
practical lines. Sho takes helploss In
fants who have been deserted or left
homeless In the world or nre tho chil
dren of defective parents and makes
them healthy and happy nith proper
care and food and then turns them over
to responsible women who give them
good homes.
Daniel, a -l-months old baby, has been
developed In this way by Mrs. Judson,
Sho took him when he wns a weakling.
He screamed constantly and It required
the greatest care and nursing to bring
him through the crisis. He Is now a
rollicking, chubby, little chap and he
laughs much more than he cries, He has
a playroom, a big bathroom and a trained
nurse to look after htm. Any woman
who takes Daniel will have a prize baby,
for he has a flying start In tho way of
health.
When some one takes Daniel Mrs.
Judson will immediately take another
baby, develop It and then give It to some
woman who yearns for the prattle of an
Infant in a childless home.
In explaining why Bho started the work,
Mrs. Judson, who Is the wife of a physi
cian, said "such a worl: has been going
on in New York for 15 years. Some doc
tors and their wives have taken in lit
tle waifs a few weeks old, up to seven
years old, and put them In good physi
cal condition; then placed them ln homes
where there was opportunity for them
to get an education and a chance in
life."
ARRANGE FOR FINE MUSIC
Special Program to Be Given
Lemon Hill Theatre Services
at
Another fine musical program has
been arranged for the New Year service
of the Lemon Hill Asociatlon. to be held
at the Garrick Theatre at 7:S0 o'clock to
morrow evening.
The soloists will Include Harriet W,
Young, soprano; Frank Emblck. bari
tone, and F, Nevln Wiest, cornetist. A
feature will be an arrangement of Llda
Shivers Leech's song, "God's Way Is the
West Way," played by Mr. Wiest and the
Philadelphia Brass Quartet at the offer
tory. In response to many requests, the open
air recital by the cornet and trombone
choir at 7 o'clock will include the "Noel"
of Adolphe Adam and other numbers re
peated from last week's Christmas pro
gram, the players being stationed on the
balcony over the Chestnut street en
trance to the theatre.
The Rev. Dr. Joxnes B. Ely will preach
the sermon, hU topic being "Fledged By
Blood."
Ambler Preacher Goes to Walbrook
The Bev. G. Berkeley GrlflUb. of Am
bler, Is to become' rector of th
Protestant Episcopal Church of the
Prince of Peace, Walbrook, according to
an announcement wade by Bishop Mur
ray, of Maryland,
sSr
an excuse."
mas not as n holiday, but as an ex
cuse. Tho wonder is it ain't died out
altogether."
"The wholesaler wouldn't miss it if
it did," Birsky commented. "Believe
me, Zapp, for every child that lays
awake the night before Christmas
thinking what his parents are going
to hand him tho next morning, there
is fifty manufacturers counting sheep
jumping over fences, trying not to
think what some of their customers in
the retail dry goods trade is going to
hand them after the second of Janu
ary. It don't rcquiro much water to
drown n shaky dry goods retailer. He
can sink like a stono in two days' rain
during the week before Christmas."
"Don't I know it?" Zapp said. "If
tho Christmas presents that the whole
salers give by mistake to shaky retail
drygoods men was put on trees the
way other Christmas presents are,
they would cover all tho redwood
groves in California. But it ain't tho
retailers' fault, Birsky. Sometimes
tho feller is playing in hard luck like
a merchant I used to sell goods to
by tho name Felix Immerglick, out in
Cincinnati, which a couple of years
ago last Christmas ho specialized on
sleighs, skates and cheap furs, and
from December 15 on they got such n
warm spell in Cincinnati that the
hotel keepers figured should they or
should they not open the roof gardens
OLD CAROLS TO BE SUNG
Special Musical Program at St. Luke
and Epiphany Tomorrow
The spirit of Christmas will be contin
ued In nn Impressive service tomorrow
nfternoon at 4 o'clock In tho Church of St.
Luke nnd tho Epiphany, when n. seconil
Christmns carol service will be given. It
will be similar to thnt of last Sunday aft
ernoon, at which moro than 1200 persons
crowded tho church and many were
turned away who could not gain admis
sion. The series of carols Includes "The Flrat
Noel," Old English; "Come, All Yo Shep
herds," Bohemian: "LiHten, Lordllngs,"
Old English; "Three Kings Have Jour,
neyed." Cornelius; "I Henrd the Bells,"
Danish; "Calmson Joyeuse." Old French;
"Silent Night, Holy Night," Old German;
"Sleep, Llttlo Dove." Old Alsatian.
The soloists will be Harry Saylor, bari
tone, nnd Mrs, Henry Hotz, soprano; Mrs.
Dorothy Johnstone Baueler, harpist: Ber
trnnd Austin, cellist, and John K. Wltze
mann, violinist.
PHILADELPHIA HAS
REAL LIVE MYSTERY
The Question Being: Who Was
the Man Hit by British Crick
eters on Board Ship?
Philadelphia has a real live, sneaky,
freaky mystery. There's a lot at the bot
tom of It, but the one that started it all
won't tell. Miss Elizabeth Sommer, of
862 North -ilst street, was on tho good
ship Morea once upon a time when It
touched at the port of Bombay, In the
tropics there Isn't much to do but drink
cooling drinks and play games when one
is on board ship. In this case a violent
game of cricket was going on, much to
the dismay of other passengers, who were
evidently looking studiously the other
way. Who the rallblrds -were is part of
the mystery. Cricket balls were flying
and some one was hit suddenly and with
great force. What part of the person was
struck Is also part of the mystery. The
teeth, perhaps, or the shin. Was It a
king out of a JobT Was It the mother-in-law
of Batsman Wilson? Or was it a
handsome man! Anyhow, the following
clipping provides for some food for
thought.
WILL, the All-Brltbh cricket team of March
4 1013. Mr. WlUon. batsman, note: The
cricket bill Injury to the uonepectator of
Kama aboard the Peninsular and Oriental
steamahlD "Morca," port Bombay, while ac
cident entirely due to carelesaneu, cricket
, Dialers, roay be surprised to know the ex-
censes have been paid by none other than the
Amrlcan woman passengers.
It all happened nearly three years ago.
Are members of the All-Brltish team
secretly hiding In this city? What Is the
plot? Ml&a Sommer, who sent the above
message to the world, won't tell.
Child Near Death by Burning
Five-year-old Dorothy Seaton, of 4718
North 11th street, Is in the Jewish Hos
pital today suffering from probably fatal
burns which she received last night when
the fell against a gas heater In her
home. That the child was not Immedi
ately burned tq death was due to her
father, who was also severely burned
la trying to beat out the flames.
&?
s&
again. So the following year Immer
glick cut out the sleighs and skates
and laid in bicycles, children's books
and n very attractive line of um
brellas, and Immerglick says that it's
a wonder with his luck he didn't also
buy stock in a chain of artificial ico
factories, becauso on the day ho re
ceived tho goods in November tho
thermometer goes down to zero on
him nnd stays that way till a week
nfter his next spring millinery open
ing. Can you blame such a feller
that he settles with his creditors 30
cents on the dollar?"
"Listen, Zapp," Birsky said, "a 30-cent-on-thc-dollar
feller could always
pin his btist-up on cither a warm
Christmns, a cold Easter or an in
valid wife, whereas the figures show
that the avcrngo of real cold Christ
mases ain't no moro than tho average
of real sick wives."
"Sum I know, Birsky, but figuring
out the average is what had done tho
most harm to pokor, pinochle, the
Fourth of July, Christmas and all them
things that former-time peoplo onjoy-
'cd running chances on. Take, for in
stance, the Fourth of July, and a lot
of people which considers oven safety
matches gofahrlich goes to work and
figures that out of every million people
that shoots off firecrackers, ono and
seven hundred and fifty-two one thou
sandths people gets burned, so thoy
put tho fireworks manufacturers out
of business, and now instead of set
ting off fireworks people goes to the
shore or trolley parks on tho Fourth;
nnd as soon as it gets figured out that
of every million people that goes to
trolley parks and Coney Island, six
and ninety-seven three-thousandths
gets Magensaurc from eating frank
furters and run over by trolley cars
"Gets iVarcjisai(i-c from eating
frankfurters."
U. OF P. GRADUATE
BRAVES WAR TO WED
Dr. George W. Mellon Now
Probably in Desolated Ser
bia to Claim Bride
PITTSBURGH, Jan.-l If ho had good
luck nfter ho sailed from New York for
Athens some tlmo ngo. Dr. George W.
Mellon, of this city. Is down In Belgrade,
Serbia, getting ready In tho midst of war
for his marriago to Miss Zagorka Cabo,
said to bo one of tho uncrowned queens
of that devastated little land.
Doctor Mellon, twlco decorated for his
work with tho American nmbulance In
the typhus camps of Serbia, flrst by
Crown Prince Alexander nnd then by the
American Red Cross, has gone back to
Serbia with another nospuai commanu
commission.
Doctor Mellon met Miss Cabo in the
course of his flrst hospital work ln Serbia.
She was not, however, a nurse; Just a
visitor. As Doctor Mellon's wife Miss
Cabo will help him In his hospital work,
which they expect to continue until the
war Is ended. Doctor Mellon continued
his wooing by letter and cable when he
recently was recalled from Serbia by tho
Red Cross. Mlsa Cabo's -ather lost prac
tically all his fortune In .he second fall
of Belgrade. Doctor Mellon Is a graduate
of the medical school of the University
of Pennsylvania.
RELIGIOUS BREVITIES
Judite J. V. Butherford, of New York, will
Klve a lecture In the Forrest Theatre, tomor
row afternoon at 5:11 o'clock nn 'Militarism:
How It Will Da Destroyed," The lecture will
be ulen under tho auspice of tho Interna
tional lllblo Students.
Tho Hev. Oeorce P. Kuns. pastor of the
First Church of the Brethren. .Carlisle and
Dauphin streets, wilt speak on the subject of
"Essential Elements of Christian Worship"
on Sunday morning. In the evening he will
preach a special New rear's aermon on
'Shall We do Forward?"
Tho Rev. George Chalmers Richmond will
preuch In St. John's EplscopalChurch tomor
row morning on "Some New Thoughts on the
Incarnation" In the evening his subject will
be. "Why Blshon Ithlnelander Adlse4 Me to
lie Cautfoue ln Mv Preaching; or. the Moral
Dendlnclc in th Church Between Capitalism
and Christ." Mr. Richmond will read two
eermons which, when published, caused the
Blshoo to advise caution, ho announces.
Holy Communion will be administered at
Messiah Lutheran Church, the Itev, D. .
Welgle. pastor, at 10.30 a. pi. and 4 u. in.
tomorrow. Special music will ba a feature
of tha evening services.
The New Year's Communion service will be
RELIGIOUS NOTICES
Baptist
HAITI ST TEMPLE. Broad and Berks sts.
RUS.SBU, 11. CO.VWBIJ, will preach.
Morning. 10.30. Bible School, 2.30: ev . 7.30.
Special music by the Chorus in the Evening
urgan recital, 'io, vv
P. TwadelU M. I.
CIIEbTNUT STREET II.UTIST CHURCH
Chestnut St. west of 40th.
aEOROE O. ADAMS. D.D.. Pastor.
0:45 a. m. Brotherhood of A. and P.
10-IOa. m. Worship and Sermon by Pastor.
2.M p, m Bible School.
7.18 p. m. Worship and Sermon by Pastor.
Second u.UTibT "helping hand
CLASS meets 3 30. 7th below Glrard ave
John C Sayrc. leader. "New Year Talks."
Friday night. Jan. 7 Rev C. K Tindley, O.
p.. by request, will repeat for the 18th time,
his great sermon. "Hun en' b Christmas Tree "
The following will assist, Mrs Henry and
Anna, Bossert, the Lawnton family. Mrs.
Aim iwi aiis. nuuuer. Airs, ircue lAuavr t
and riaurhter Miss !?!, t'ematf Ulnfl I
Green, tha Price Sisters. Leah Motter, Mr. 1
Milton lllngler Little Theltna Sparks, Bun- I
me WIj ana, tha John C Sayre Quintet. I
Our clrw lusa&j cordially welcoaio.
.
1, 1916.
Illustrations by BRIGGS
?
"Thinking what his parents arc
on the Fourth of July, all the frank
furter factories and trolley companies
go quick mcchullah."
"Abo; what's that got to do with
Christmas?" Birsky asked.
"I'm coming to that," Zapp said.
"People are commencing to figure
averages on Christmas also. Take
Miss J. P. Morgan, and she figures
thnt out of every million Christmns
presents displayed in stores a certain
percentage of people buys something
which they couldn't afford and gives
it to a certain percentage of peoplo
which ain't got no use for it at all.
So she goes to work and gets up a So
ciety for tho Prevention of Useless
Giving, and consequently a certain
percentage of drygoods stores loses a
certain percentage of customers which
formerly had a rotten bank account
and a good disposition, and has now
got a good bank account and a rotten
disposition."
"But Miss Morgan done this for a
lot of salesladies which used to spend
their money so foolishly nt Christmas,
Zapp, that they had nothing left to
take a vacation with in the summer
time."
"That may bo so, Birsky," Zapp
said, "and while I ain't exactly a certi
fied public accountant, Birsky, I figure
that if 90 per cent, of Christmas shop
pers followed MissMorgan's advico,
Birsky, the drygoods stores would shut
down around Christmas, and all them
nbservod In the Advocate Methodist Krlcppal
Church, aermantonn, tho Rev. Gladstone
Holm, pastor, tomorrow morning. A special
muxlcnl program will bo KUcn In tho evening,
Special music will he gUen In the Central
North Broad Street Presbyterian Church at
7:43 o'clock tomorrow opening.
"The Holy City." by Gaul, will bo given nt
tho Church o( the Holy Apostles at tho eve
ning sen ico tomorrow.
John C. Sayne will lend tho Second Baptist
Helping Hand Class nt :!.:10 o'clock tomorrow.
Mrs. Anna G. Spencer, professor of sociology
In tho Mcadvlllo Theological Seminary, will
give an nddress. under tho ausplcea of the
Society of Ethical Culture, In the Broad Street
Theatre at 11 o'clock tomorrow. The subject
will bo "Religious Education and tho Public
School."
Brethren
1'IKbT CHURCH 01' THE BRETHREN
(Dunker), cor. Carlisle and Dauphin sts.
Preaching 10-30 a. m. and 7:4S p. m.
Sunday School 2:80 p. m.
Prayer Meeting each Wednesday evening.
Churches of Christ, Scientist
FREE LECTURE ON
C1IIIIHTIAN SCIENCE
By VIItaiL O. bTRICKLER. C. S.
Member of tho Board of Lectureship of The
Mother Church, Boston. Mass,
To Be neutered
SUNDAY AFTERNOON. JAN. II. AT 3:30 P. M.
In NIXON'S GRAND. OPERA HOUSE
Broad St. and Montgomery ave.
PUBLIC CORDIALLY INVITED.
Dlsclplea of Christ
THIRD CHHIbllAN CHURCH
Lancaster ave., Holly and Aspen sts.
T. E. WINTER. Pastor." 10.30. 3:80. T. 1.
Ethical Culture
MRS. ANNA GAUI.IN SPENCER will speak
on "Religious Education and the Public
School." Broad St. Theatre, Sunday, It a. m.
Public Invited.
Franklin Home
FRANKLIN HOME VOIt THE REFORMA
TION OF INEBRIATES. 011-13 Locust St.
Sunday. S p. m.. services conducted by Mr,
E. P Tompkins. Jr.
Lemon Hill Association
"PLEDGEH 1IY HI.OOD"
GARRICK THEATRE
SUNDAY NU1HT, 7.S0
ALL WELCOME ALL
Lutheran
MESSIAH LUTHERAN
"The Friendly Church."
iblh and Jerrerfcon sts.
Daniel E. Welgle. Pastor.
Holy Communion. 10. .10 a. m.
Reception of members.
2 30 p. m. Bible School.
4 0 p. m Second Communion.
7.43 p. m. Musical Prelude, G. LeRoy Lind
say, organist, John HlPtteil. tenor, and Pro
fessional Solo Quartet.
TABERNACLE, C9tb and Spruce Wm. J.
Miller. Jr. 10:45. 7 45. 8, S 2:30 p. m.
TEMPLE, 82d and Race Rev. A. Pohlman.
M. D.. 10.30 a. m.. 2.30 and 7:43 P. m.
Methodist Episcopal
CHURCH OF THE ADVOCATE
Wayne uve. and Queen lane.
GLADSTONE HOLM. MINISTER
10:4i New Years Communion Service. Re
ception of members.
7 43 Sermon by Minister. . Special musical
program by vetted choir and soloists.
Miscellaneous
UNION EVANGELISTIC CAMPAIGN. Jan.
Union Tabernacle Presbi terlan.
Frankford Avenue Baptist.
Beacon Presbyterian.
Emmanuel Reformed Episcopal,
First week In Unlen Tabernacle Fresbyteilan
Church, York and Jasper sts.. Dr. Robert
Hunter, Pastor
MISSION WORKERS meet dally at 12:30,
except Sunday, t 82U Hale Building.
New Jerusalem (Swedenborglaa)
NEW EAK SUNDAY. -A NEW HEAVEN.
a. new cuiu. wm nz Jerusalem u tna
a. flew cuiu. wh new Jerusalem 14 I
KUbjeit of tha sermon, Sunday morning,
the Pastor, ihe Rev. Cbarlea W Harvey
tEe Church of the New Jerusalem. S24 a
ln
Chestnut . Scr le l 11 o'clbcE Sunday
school at u .10. Au teta are free, y-.er,
body is welcome.
P tt
jgTA'tftf'j
going to hand him next morning."
salesladies would not only tako a va
cation in tho summer time, but In tho
winter time also; and then tho ques
tion is, 116w is them salesladies going
to raise money for their winter vaca
tions?" "Miss Morgan would get up a sub
scription maybe," Birsky suggested.
"And the proceeds after tho ex
penses of collection wore deducted
would support twenty-threo six hun
dredths of a saleslady for 6.008 hours,
Birsky," Zapp concluded, "which tho
trouble with them people that figuro
out the averages is that they don't
consider human beings as men nnd
women, but as fractions aua gc reck
oned to hundred-thousandths yet
Also it's a good thing to figure out tho
average on tho percentages of peoplo
that set off fireworks and don't get
burned, and the percentage of pcoDlo
that it wouldn't do a bit of hanv. to
if they bought once in a while lor
somebody a present, useful or other
wise. In other words, Birsky, if
you're going to reckon up tho averages
on nnything, the best way is to figuro
how it will affect ono hundred onc
hundredths of the peoplo twelve
months out of tho year, and then go
to work and got up the Society for tho
Prevention of Prevention Societies and
limit the membership to one hundred
million Americans. Most of us would
join it"
CopyrUht. 1010. The Tribune Aiaociatlsn.
RELIGIOUS NOTICE8
Presbyterian
CKNTHAI, NORTH 11IIOAI) STREET
pjci:siiyti:rian ciiuncn
Ilrond and Green streets.
Rev. ROBERT HUGH MORRIS. Pastor.
Worship, with Sermon, by tho Pastor, at
i0:1.1 o, m nnd 7:45 p. m. Evening subject.
"Judas." Violin solo by Mr, Lo A. Dessauer
In tho evening, with addition to the quartet
music.
Every ono cordially Invited.
HOl'E, 3.1d nnd Wharton sts. Minister. Rev.
J. GRAY BOLTON. D. D.t Rev. WILLIAM
TAYLOR CALDWELL. Assistant. lfj-ljj
Rev. Mr. Caldnell will preach. 7:13. ComJ
munlon.
WELSH, 21at below Fatrmount
W1LHAMB. 10'30. Welsh: 7:30.
Rev. R.
English.
Protestant Episcopal
THE CHURCH or THE HOI.Y APOSTLES
21st nnd Christian sts
Rev. George Hubert Loon. D, V. Rector.
U.OOa. m. Holy Communion,
lu.jo a. m. Holy Communion nnd Sermon by
tho Rector.
2:30 p. m.-5unday School and Blbla Classes.
7:43 p.m. Third monthly Musical Service.
The Holy City." by Gaul, with hafiTand
violin accompaniment. The morning Ser
mon will ba appropriate to tho New Year's
Idea.
church or bt. luke and
THE KI'IPIIANY
13th street, below Spruce. 1
Rev. DAVID M. STEELE. Rector.
8 a. m. Holy Communion.
10 a. in. Sundav ichnnl.
11 a. m. Morn ne prater and aermon,
4 p. m. Repetition Christmas carol s
of ancient classic carols.
carol service
The. First Noel.. ........ .Old English carol
Cpme All Ye Shepherds Bohemian
Listen. Lordllngs..,. ..,, Old English
ThrI.'?J?" IHa?", Journeyed... Cornelius
I Heard the Bells ,,..,,.,,, ,, Danish carol
Chanson Joyeuse Old French
Silent Nlaht. Holy Night. .Old German carol
Sleep. Little Dove,,..,., Old Alsatian
HOLY TRINITY MEMORIAL CHAPEL, 22D
AND SPRUCE ST3 MOItNIND PRAYER.
HOLY COMMUNION AND SERMON ll
M.. SUNDAY SCHOOL. 2.4S P M. EVE
INO PRAYER AND ADDRESS. S P M
OLD ST. JOHN'S. Brown st below 3d Dr
Richmond preaches tomorrow. 10-45 & 7:43.
ST. STEPHEN'S CHURCH "
10th st. aboie Chestnut
Re , CARL E. ORAMMER, S. T. D.. Rector,
t' 41 u. m. Sunday School.
11:00 a.m. Morning Prayer. Holy Commu
nion and bermon by the Rector
4.00 p. m. Evening Prayer and Sermon by
the Rector. Special Christmas music.
Reformed Episcopal
OUR REDEEMER. 10th and Oxford sts
Rev. AUGUSTUS E. BARNETT: 10.30 a. nx..
"1018 What We Make If: TU5 p. ro-. A
Better Stock Than Bethlehem Btcel"
Reformed
FIRST N. A., ISth and Dauphin. Rv John
D. Hicks. Pastor lfl :tn nr.,1 s e s m
Socialist Literary hudety"
CLARENCE UARROW, famous labor nt
torney, will speak tomorrow, S n.m . ut Broad
Street Theatre. Music by th UW String
Quartet.
Swedeaborghm
SEE NEW JERUSALEM
Unitarian
V1RST UNITARIAN, 2123 Cheslnut t - Re .
C. K. ST JOHN D D.. MlnJtrr JO a m.
Sundai jSchooL U a m. Nw Years Sarvlca.
In bU aoriuoa Dr. gt, John will present some
good resolutions. a
The choir Philip H. Goepp, director will
sing "Fear Not, Q IraV by Splektr and
"The Xard I My ebecherl" by GoTpp.
TaMela""1 by Bev-
UJUS. MJtA. '
Young lcu' Christian Aasoctotiojs
UONOUAULU HAKKY PHILLIPS KT
Mayor ot East London, will spoak at Central
M. C A Sunday, sX 3 :3tt d m. finhiiirr
irlena" " 818 "mM CJ?fh
BENEVOLENT ASSOCIATI4
TMK SALVATION AKMY, Jjae.
TPUadjphl HtmeX ceufa. t-,
Colonel R K. Jo reic4ML
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