Tl)2c I,larttaotct /nt/ietttic(crt?,et
VOL. LXIV
PHE LANCASTER INTELLIGENCER
11L1131111D JURY IDESOLT, AT NO. 8 NORTH DUMB STOUT,
BY GEO. SANDERSON
TERMS
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For The Intelligencer
FROM THE FRENCH OF VICTOR HUGO.
Unconscious of thy childhood's grace,
Oh! envy not our riper years.
Where storms and calms by turns find place,
Whose smiles are sadder than thy tears.
Enjoy thy morn—thy life's young Spring,
Thy childhood's sunny, fleeting hours:
Why wish them past? Cold Time will fling
Full soon his blight o'er Joy's fair flowers
Swiftly enough the years will come,
Regrets—false friendships in their train,
Till bow'd 'neath thine unfailing doom
Thou'lt wish thyself a child again.
Smile on! Thou bast no griefs, no fears !
Smile on ! Cloud not thy brow with care,
Nor dim thy deep blue eye with tears,
Pure mirror of thy spirit fair,
May 25th, 1863
THE RAIN DROP
The rain drop! the rain drop!
Its soft and tiny feet
Keep up a pleasant pattering
Along the dusty street.
The rain drop! the rain drop!
it falleth on the stream,
It floats'in gladsomeness along,
Beneath the sunny beam.
The rain drop ! the rain drop!
It whispers to mine ear,
I am but lent to earth, not given,
I must not tarry hors.
Soon as the golden sun shall shine
In an unclouded sky,
Borne on the gentle breeze I'll haste
To my sweet home on high.
And when all nature seems athirst,
On mountain, hill and plain,
The bright and sparkling rain drop
Will visit thee again.
hi : I Di lIIIVRI/:V:itki DO :NAO. Ili 0 ; 1
BULL.
A TRUE STORY
There will be a' smart chance' of , bull'
in this story. I cannot promise that it will
be a good story or funny story ; but I am
keen to say that it is a true one.
What I am going to relate happened in
Muscatine county, lowa, midway between
lowa city, then the capital of State, and
Muscatine city, a flourishing town on the
Mississippi river, in a section of the coun
try called the Wapsinoenoc Settlement,
from a creek bearing that name which runs
through the settlement.
It was in '52, (and that part of lowa
was then thinly settled,) that I found my
self one night, at the Eagle Hotel,' in
West Liberty, a village of some five houses,
about one mile east of Wapsinoonoe Creek,
(Wapsi—white, nor—earth, nor—creek ;
literally white earth creek,) and situated
on a beautiful prairie below.
Some half dozen travelers and villagers
were loungin ,, b in front of the ample fire
place in the bar-room—for, though the
settlers had only a few days since finished
their harvest, the evenings were somewhat
cool, and a small fire was necessary to per
fect comfort—talking of their prospects,
and whether there was likely to be a
large emigration pass through to California
in the Spring, to buy their surplus food
and other produce, when a new character
burst upon the stage. As the door was
flung open, all eyes were fixed in a stare
of astonishment and wonder on the new
comer.
The stranger was a tall, raw boned,
lantern-jawed individual, with flaxen locks
straggling about his shoulders. His long
spindle legs were encased in blue jeans,
and he wore a coat of the steel pen cut,'
and im-color what he would have denomi
nated hutternut,' with an oil-cloth cap
drawn so tightly down upon his head, that
it had the appearance of having been pasted
on.
Then what appeared most strange and
unaccountable, was, that he was wringing,
dripping wet. His whitish-yellow ear
looks were pasted down to his cheeks, and
streaks of dirt, marked the course of divers
miniature water-courses across his fore
head, and down his nose ; water dripped
from the olawbammer tails of his coat and
from the wristbands of the same. On his
back he carried an oil-cloth carpet-bag,
securely fastened by stout leather straps,
which crossed upon his back.
Marching into the middle of the room
with an immense clatter .of wet cow-hide
boots; he halted and cast an inquiring
glance around the circle occupying the
benches in front of the fire. Bagley, the
landlord of the 4 Eagle' arose, nodded and
said, ' Good eve'in', sur.'
Heow d'ye dew ? Be yeou the land
lord of this house V
Yes-r.'
Wan't t' know ? Reckon ye couldn't
keep a feller hur, nor give a bite o' suthin
for supper, could yer ?'
, Yos-r.'
4Ye moan to say yer ken—bed and
breakfast 1'
' Yes-r.'
Darn glad t' hear on't ; and of you kin
just mix a feller a little suthin hot and
strong, with a good deal of rum in't an'
but little water, it'll do me a mazin sight
o' good.'
Strong, mind—a good deal o' linker
You've got rum ?'
6 Yes-r:
A good deal o' rum an' hut little water
—stiff, as the old man used to say—stiff,
Mr. Landlord.'
6 Yes-r.'
While the landlord was preparing his
rum,
the stranger stood in front of the bar,
with the pack still on his back, evidently
bent on seeing the correct thing was done
in the rum and water mingling. Then
having imbibed a regular snorter,' he
asked the landlord to assist in removing
his pack. This being done, he was about
banding his carpet-bag over to the land
lord, to put behind the bar, when he
caught sight of an immense rent in it, and
therefrom protruding the corners of articles
of clothing within it. The instant he made
the discovery, the carpet sack fell from his
hands, his jaw dropped, and for a few
seconds he stood the very image of des
pair. At length he roused himself, and
strikingahis clenched fist against his fore
head, he howled in a voice of heart-rending
agony.
4 Ruined, ruined, ruined ! Tetotally
busted to smash ! One hundred and sixty
sores of the best land that ever lay eout
o' doors ripped all -to finders ! 0, Sarer
Ann ! little knowest thou that we are a
rained, busted fainily ! Little yeou think
est that thou art a beggar ! 0, Jerewsa
lem ! How shall I ever meet yeow, since
this sin, this detruckshion have been rant ?
After all our skrimpin' and skrewin' and
pinohin' turnin' and twistin' ; after
selling 0111 Barney and the steers ; after
selling the two year old heifer and the nine
shoats ; and after thou, 0, Serer Ann,
goin' to church in a kalliker, we're a bus
ted family ! 0, Jerewsalem ! All, all
lost, and gone in a minute ! 0, heow,
little Jed and Sarer Ann, can I meet you ?'
This outburst from the Yankee surprised
us all. We could not imagine what had
happened to cause him so much grief, for
the poor man was actually beside himself,
with terror and despair and tears were
&Wing plentifully down his weather-beaten
cheeks.
What on earth has happened to you to
cause you so much distress ? You are cer
tainly not lamenting at this rate over that
rent in your carpet-bag 1' asked I advanc
ing to where our Yankee was standing.
4 Oh, no, no ; holy Jerewsalem ! of 'twas
nothin' else but that ! Oh, murder, mur
der. I dason't hardly think on't. There's
poor, poor, SarerAnn, feelin's so proud,
and talkin' to little Jed about our fine
new home on the prairies, just like me
and her uste often do, an' here 0, Jew
das ! is a hull quarter section of the neat
est land in lowa gone to everlasting
smash !'
The poor fellow's feelings now complete
ly mastered him, and he hid his face in
his hands and sobbed like a child. His
last words, however, gave me a clue to the
mystery, and taking his carpet-bag, I
commenced hauling out shirts, vests, and
handkerchiefs, all thoroughly water soak
ed, till at the bottom I found a carefully
rolled bundle.
Mr. Yankee had now controlled his
grief, and stood hear by, with his hands on
his knees, bending over me in breathless
suspense. Unrolling a hickory shirt, I
found within a large brown paper parcel,
and within that, a handkerchief carefully
pinned, and within it a package done up in
a newspaper. On opening the newspaper,
I found what I bad expected at first—a
land warrant for 160 acres government
land, all snug and dry.
It is almost useless to attempt to des
cribe the extravagant joy of the Yankee.
The moment that this land warrant was
safe and sound, he gave a perfect howl of
delight, and snatching it from my hand, he
pressed it to his bosom, as he might have
done Sarer Ann, had she been present,
and with tremendous strides commenced
pacing back and forth across the room.—
It seemed impossible for him to be still an
instant.
Glory to God !' cried he—' glory to
the most Highest ! Sarer Ann, all our
serimpin' and savin' ain't in vain ! Go on
with yeour talk—plan and kalkerlate !
Take little Jed on yeour knee and sing!
In the evenin' when yeou go out to milk,
look to'rd where the sun is, and think—
there I've a happy home! Your Peleg's
there ; hey the land and we'll be
happy yit ! The steers is saved ! the
shoats is all right ! the heifer ain't gono
in, and old Barney is bound to count ! 0
fellers ! yeou see in yeour midst the happy
head of er family—you witness a joyful
human—'
'lf you will excuse my interrupting
you, sir, and it is a fair question,' said I,
how did you come to get into this sorry
pickle ?'
Excuse the question ? Sarting—sart
ing, sir ! Tell yer all the partikelars—a
full account ! Jewdas ! what a narrer
escape that question did hey !'
4 Well, but lot's have the story.'
Yaas, sarting, sarting. Wal, gents,
my name is PelegSnodgrass, son of Deacon
Eleazer Snodgrass, from down in Maine,
on—
, Never mind that. Tell us how you
got so wet.'
Yaas, carting! Well you see back
hut 'bout a mile beyant the Nockyernoseoff
Creek. I was walrin' along as happy as
a lark, lookin' abeout over the prairers
thinkin' bow beautiful the great All Bein'
had made the world, and what awful taters
this sile would raise, when I see a big
drove o' cattle jist one side. I wnr ad
mirin' as heow fat and slick they wur, an'
lookin' at their good pints, when an
almighty great brindle bull jumped up
out'n the tall grass and begin tew shake
his allfired great curly head an' beller an'
switch his tail n' paw the sile over his
back. I concluded it wnr best tew let on
likes ef I want afeared and so I begin to
whistle Rake er deown Sal,' and other
good chunes, thinkin' as heow I'd slip past
the blasted ole cuss; but jist as I got op
persite, he gin a snort, an' begin tew walk
tor'd me, stoppin' onot in a while to fetch
a rake in the silo with his fore feet. I put
in a few quick steps 'beout then, but was
afeared to run, cos i knowed ef I did he'd
feel encouraged. Patty soon he begin to
come on the trot, and then I let out in a
kinder canter. Then he rise to lope, an'
seein' it wur no use a waitin' for him to
quit, I jiat loosened these ere legs o' mine
an' come down to my best time.
I looked abeout for suthin' to climb, but
there I wnr, in the cussed prairer an' not
a pea-stick tew be seen nigher than a mile
ahead, heow I did want to stop right there
an' cuss the blasted prairers. I gin a
glance over my shoulder end see the ever
lastin' cuss with his nose deown an' his
tail up, comin' jist on the dead lay down,
and 1 let my legs count another notch.
The chase wur nip and tuck till I got near
the creek, when I see that the bull wur
makin' a little grain the best time—he
wnr only 'beout a hundred yards behind
me. Lord, Jehossy fat ! but I felt queer
ish when I wur starting he wur gaining, it
giv me rich a skeer that my heart 'peered
to dissolve in dishwater and my legs kinder
lost their feelin' so I couldn't run. But I
could see a lot of trees ahead a little ways,
an' of I could hold eont three minits
longer I'd be in 'em. I looked back and,
the sufferin Moses ! ef the bull want in
twenty feet o' me, his eyes all green and
his nostrils looked like I mite a put my
head in 'em—an' as red as a bolt of new
flannin'. I got almost to the creek, when
I found the timber wur all on the oppersite
bank from me, an' the bull so close I could
almost fool his breath on my back. I
thought of my famerly in that offel time ; '
see I— 'Farewell, little Jed and you Sarer
Ann, my gentle companion !' Jist at that
instant I see a stump rite on the bank of
the creek and made a spring fur it, ax
pectin' to get on't, but it happened to be
•holler and I landed inside. I jist had
room to squeeze deown in it an' geti my
head below the top knot, wen deown Mr.
Ball's head came np—whaek against.-the
stump till everything jingled.
" THAT COUNTRY IB TEI MOST PROSPIROUS WHIRR LABOR OORMARDS THI ORIATIST RIWA.RD."--BUOHANAIL
LANCASTER CITY, PA., TUESDAY MORNING, JUNE 2, 1863.
You better believe I felt thankful I wur
housed at last ; and the ole cuss of a bull
wasn't he disappointed ! Lord, how he
did rave round that stump, switch his tail,
paw the Bile an' beller ? I peeped up at
him jist to see how he were gettin' on, but
kalkerlate I peeped down again offel sud
dent ! for I hadn't moren got my head up
till his horns came a straddle of it, and
his skull hit the stump like a maul. The
little incerdent convinced me that the best
thing I could do was in the langwidge of
Squire Wheeler, to lay low, watch black
ducks, and chaw pokeroot.' Jist as I'd
made up my mind not to put up my head
agin, I felt the offelest pain take me in the
leg I ever see, an' at the same time
sumthin' commenced to whiz, I tried to
look down to see what on airth it could be,
but the holler was so narrow I couldn't
git a chance to_look, and all at once it
popped into my head that there was a rat
tlesnake in the stump.
When I thot o' that I made a offel
plunge to git out of the confounded den ;
but the cussed bull warnt morn six feet
off, an' the minit he seed my head he came
at me full chisel. The first I knowed
had dodged back inter the stump agin and
hadn't morn touched bottom 'fore I felt
another offel keen bite in my leg. I made
a rush to git out again, but the cussed, in
fernal bull drove at me, an' I was bleeged
to pop back agin. As I squeezed down
inter my stump agin, I would'er bet a gal
lon o' rum that Sarer Ann would be widow
in less'n tew hours. — I tried to cypher out
which would be the most becomin' for a
christian, to be pizened to death by an
offel great snaik, or have my inards slung
to the four winds by a cussed brindle bull.
I thot of the martyrs—of Amos biled in
ile, Elizer smeered with honey, and Joseph
tempted by Pottifer's wife, and concluded
that I ort to profit by their example, and
grin and bear it, no matter how much it
went agin the grain. But I got jist then
a offel bite or tew, and to save my soul,
oouldn't help stickin' out my head and, and
the bull bein' on hand, let drive and filled
my eyes chuck full of bark and dirt; so
down I hobbled again for snaiks. I now
begin to get bites offel frequently, and in
bad places ; the whizzen got louder, I
squirmed and twisted, and sereechen at a
fast rate, and in grabbin' round I ketohed
something and got a bite in the hand.
I held my bolt on to it, and behold, it
proved to be nothin' but a yaller-jacket !
When I found I wasn't snaik bit, I felt
suthin' lift off my stumick like a bag o'
shot— , Glory to God !' ses I ' I may live
to protect the widder and fatherless yit !'
I felt for a minit as if I didn't keer fur all
the yaller-jackets between Mississippi and
Missouri—but the blessed Jgrusha ! I
hadn't seen one then- to where I see a
thousand in another minit ! The whole
holler o' that stump got yaller with 'em.
I couldn't stand it long that way. I tried
to think of some kind o' prayer suitable to
the 'casion, and commenced: 4, Now I lay
me down to sleep,' but by Jewdas, I could
n't pray for cassia'. I jist swore, bull or
no bull, I was gwino to emigrate from that
particular spot ; but every time I put my
head above the stump, the bull pitched at
me and hit the stump jist like a maul—he
looked ferocious, with his eyes green and
blazin' as fire, and the foam droppin' from
his mouth. I was bobbin' up and down so
continerally, that I was abeout half the
time in the stump and half cent, and at
last I felt the stump beginnin' to give way
under the thumps the infernal old brindle
was givin' it, and my hair riz straight on
end. I made up my mind to git eout o'
that, somehow, purty quick, but jist at the
minit I raised up my head to jump out and
ran, the old cuss came at me, with his
bead deown and tail' up, at locomotive
speed, and as I dodged deown be struck
the stump, tore it up at the roots and shot
me eout like I was a bumshell, clean over
the bank into the creek, and arter me come
the stump, bull and all. The fore feet, or
one on 'em of the bull, truck me rite on
the back—and I reckon that's what tore
the carpet-bag—knockin' me clean down
to the muddy bottom of the creek. When
I riz, the first thing. I seed was the old
feller's tail, and as I couldn't swim a lick,
I made a grab for it and made him tow me
ashore. When we got there; I let go and
run one way, while the bull run the other,
and 'that is the hull long and short on't.
The Dead of Pompeii Exhumed.
A correspondent of the London .5t hen
reum gives some interesting particulars
concerning the exhuming the dead of Pom
peii. He says :
Farther researches led to the discovery
of a male body, another woman, and that of
a young girl Out that which first awakened
the interest of the excavators, was the find
ing df ninety-one of pieces silver money,
four ear-rings, a finger-ring, all of gold;
together with two iron keys and evident
remains of a linen bag. These interesting
relics have been now successfully removed,
and are lyinc c in a house not far distant.—
They are to be preserved in Pompeii, and
four bronze tables, of an antique fashion,
are preparing for their reception.
The first body discovered was that of a
woman, who lay on her right side, and from
the twisted position of her body, had been
much convulsed. Her left hand and arm
were raised and contorted,and the knuckles
were bent in tightly ; the right arm was
broken and at each end of the fragments
the cellular character of bones was seen.
The form of the head-dress and the hair
were distinctly visible. On the bone of
the little finger of the left hand were two
silver rings, one of which was a guard.
The sandals remain, or the soles at least,
and iron or nails are unmistakably to be
seen. Though the body was much bent,
the legs were extended as if under the in
fluence of extreme pain.
In an inner chamber was found the figure
of the young girl lying on its face, resting
on its clasped hands and arms ; the legs
drawn up, the left lying over the right—
the body thinly covered over in some parts
by the scoriae or the plaster, whilst the
skull was visible, highly polished. One
hand was partilaly closed,as if it had grasp
ing something, probably her dress, with
which it had covered the head. The fing
er-bones protruded through the incrusted
ashes, and on the surface of the body in va
rious parts was distinctly visible the web of
linen with which it had been covered.—
There was lying by the side of the child a
full-grown woman, the left leg slightly
elevated, whilst the right arm is broken ;
bnt the left, which is bent is perfect, and
the hand is closed. The little finger
.has
an iron. ring ;the left_ear,, which - is tipper
most,is very conspicuous and standoff from
the head. The folds of the drapery, the
very web, remain, and a nice observer
might detect the quality of the dress.
Tne body of the man lay upon its back,
with the legs streched out to their full
length. There was an iron ring on the lit
tle finger of the left hand, which together
with the arm, was supported by the elbow.
The folds of the dress on the arm and over
the whole upper part of the body were visi
ble ; the sandals were there, and the bones
of the foot protruded through what might
have been a broken sandal. The traces of
the hair of the head and beard were there ;
and the breath of life, adds the writer, had
only to be inspired into this and the other
three figures to restore to the world of the
nineteenth century the Romans of the first
century. They might have fallen but yes
terday, for were there not still remaining
their sandals, their dress, the very tracery
of their hair ? They were trying to escape
from destruction, for the bodies were found
at a short distance one from the other, as if
in the act of running. What could have
induced them to remain so long it is only
permitted to imagine. They were three wo
men who, terror struck, had been unable,
perhaps, to act, until aided and urged for
ward by the man. It may be that w ith
that attachment which binds us all so close
ly to our native homes with the hope that
the storm would soon pass away.
How a Roman Emperor Lived.
Bruce, in his ' Classic, and Historic Por
traits,' gives the following sketch of tha
effeminate creature, the Emperor Helio
gabalus :
In his magnificence, Heliogabalus was
truly Oriental. He had beds and conches
of solid silver. He adorned others of his
bedd with gold. His chariots glittered
with gems. They were drawn sometimes
by elephants, sometimes by stags, and
sometimes by beautiful naked women.—
His drinking and cooking vessels were of
silver. He was also guilty of the luxury
which at a later period, St. Chrysostom
charges as a sin against the Christian la
dies of Constantinople—of using vessels
of the most precious material for the most
ignoble purposes.
He had cups artificially perfumed for
drinking, and others on which lascivious
designs were sculptured ; an iniquity not
confined to ancient and heathen times. At
table he reclined on conches stuffed with
the fur of hares or the down of partridges.
He wore cloaks heavy with gems, and
used to say that he was burdened with a
load of pleasure. He had gems in his
shoes, sculptured with designs by the finest
artists. He wore a diadem of precious
stones that he might resemble a woman.
He is said to have been the first Roman
who wore robes of entire silk. He never,
it is said, wore a ring for more than one
day, or twice put on the same shoes.
In his more refined and elegant luxuries
he was the rival of the ancient Demetrius
Poliorcetes. He had beds and couches of
roses, and walked amongst lilies, violets,
hyacinths and narcissus.
When he wished to add the piquant fla
vor of cruelty to his enjoyments, he would
stifle a courtier to death in a bed of flow
ers. He swam in water perfumed with
saffron and precious unguents ; and wine
and aromatics were poured into his fish
ponds and his baths.
In eating and drinking ho appears not
so much as a glutton, but as the chief of
all royal epicures—the equal in gastro
nomic science of the renowned Apicus.
He joined with all who studied the pleas
ure of the palate in admiration of the dish
which the Romans made of the teats of a
newly farrowed pig—the most celebrated
of ancient luxuries. After the example of
Apicus he indulged in dishes made of the
tender parts of the heel of the camel, and
of combs torn from the heads of living
cooks. This latter delicacy, Cassaubon,
in his commentary on the passage in the
Augustan historian in which it is referred
to, tells us, is at this day—that is in his
day, two hundred years ago—passionately
sought after by men of learned palates.
Like Vitellus, he seems to have had his
appetite whetted by the expensiveness of
the dishes which he procured ; and in sacri
ficing the rarest and most beautiful birds_
for the sake of eating their heads, their
brains or their tongues.
At one entertainment he displayed on
his table the heads of six hundred
ostriches, whose brains, as well as those of
the flamingo and thrush, were amongst his
favorite repasts. He also indulged in the
tongues of peacocks and nightingales, be
lieving that they had a medical virtue in
averting epilepsy. He also made dishes
of the entrails and sometimes of the beards
of the mullet, of the eggs of partridges,
and the heads of pheasants, peacocks and
parrots. We wonder at the destruction of
creatures so lovely to the sight as the pea
cock, the flamingo and the pheasant, for
the particle of delicate eating to be got
from them, but epicurism and gluttony
consume and destroy all other tastes.
The genius of Heliogabalus shone par
ticularly bright in the cooking of fish. In
this department he is said to have invented
new modes unknown to Apicus ; but with
a refined hatred of things common and
cheap, he would never taste fish at all
when he was near the sea, but always took
delight in them when far removed from
water, just as he took a fancy for having
snow brought to him in midsummer. He
offered rewards for the discovery of new
dishes of exquisite flavor, and he had a
humorous way of stimulating the invention
of those around him in this science. When
a courtier, after exerting his best skill to
please him, produced a dish which he did
not relish, he made the ingenious artist
himself continue to eat of that dish and of
nothing else, till his faculties, sharpened
by disgust, enabled him to• find out some
thing superior for his master.
Like Nero and Caligula, Heliogabalus
had his jocularities—generally practical
ones--sometimes merely absurd,sometimes
characteristically cruel. His most harm
less entertainments in this 'way consisted
of the suppers which be would give one
night to eight men, all of them blind of
one eye, sometimes to eight afflicted with
gout, then to eight deaf men, eight black
men, eight tall and eight fat men.
He kept, lions and leopards, which lay
at table with him, in order to frighten his
friends. He would get a company filled
with drink, and after looking them up for
the night would let loose amongst them
lions, leopards and bears; with their,claws .
pared, to terrify them, and many, it is said,
died of fright.
At, ether times;_wheW ~ dayfigillWOuld
break in on the bomptuiy 'who haa- been
drinking the night before, they would find
themselves in the arms of ugly old black
women. At other times he made sham
entertainments, like the Barmioide's feast
in tho Eastern tale, setting his guests
down to dishes made of wax, ivory or
stone, painted after nature. lie collected
serpents together and let them loose to
bite his visitors. He would tie his court
iers to a wheel and have them whirled
round in water, calling them, in allusion
to the mythological fable, his lxionite
friends.'
Fearing a violent death from the ven
geance of the people, Helicgabalus had
made preparations, which turned out to be
all in vain, for terminating his existence in
an elegant manner. He had poison mixed
up with the most precious articles, he had
ropes of crimson and purple silk ready to
strangle himself with, and golden swords
to stab himself with. He had also a high
tower built with rich adornings, where he
might breathe out his last in royal state.
The manner of his death was just the re
verse of all that he desired. After being
slain, his body was first thrown into tho
common sewer, then dragged through the
streets and oast into the Tiher. Accord
ing to Herodian and Dion, the same indig
nities were inflicted on the body of his
mother, who was killed at the same time.
Mon represents Heliogabalas as having
been slain in her arms, and states that
both their heads were cut off, and their
bodies stripped naked, and that the one
was thrown into one place of the river and
the other into another.
BETTER THAN THAT.--The Emperor
Joseph of Austria, was one day taking a
ride in his carriage, and a sharp shower
of rain came on, wham an old invalid°,
hobbled to the door, and asked him if he
would allow him to get in, as he had his
new uniform on for the first time, and he
did not wish to get it spoiled. The Emper
or acquiesced, and they soon got into con
versation. Amonst other things, the old
soldiers mentioned that he had had a cap
ital breakfast that morning. ' What was
it V said the Emperor. Well, 'said the
Invalide, guess.' The Emperor good
humoredly complied, and went over all the
dishes in vogue amongst the military,to all
of which he got the answer Better than
that.' At last finding that the stranger
could not guess it, the old soldier ac
knowledged with great glee, that he
had taken a pheasant out of the Imperial
preserves. The Emperor seemed to think
it a good joke, and the subject was drop
ped. When they had nearly reached the
town, the old invalid°, who had been re
counting some of his experience on the
battle field, said to the stranger : You
look like a military man yourself, sir ;
what position might you hold V Well 7
said the Emperor much amused, guess!'
After having repeated all the grades in the
army, from sergeant up to field-marshal,
to all of which he got the answer. Bet
ter than that, ' the truth of who the stran
ger was seemed to flash upon his mind,
and his confusion can be better imagined
than described. His poaching expedition
was however pardoned by the Emperor,
and the story of their meeting was over
after a faverite joke at court.
Wrv - Es AND CARPETS.—The Chicago
Journal thus learnedly philosophizes on
these themes. There is a large streak of
sense in the reflection :
In the selection of a carpet you shonld
always prefer one with small figuaes, for
the two webs of which the fabric consists
are always more closely interwoven than in
carpetings where large figures are
wrought.
There is a good deal of true philosphy in
tnis that will apply to matters widely dif
ferent from the selection of carpets. A
man commits a sad mistake when he selects
a wife that cuts too large a figure on the
carpet of life—in other words, make much
display. The attractions fade—the web
of life becomes worn and weak, and all
the gay figures that seemed so charming
at first, disappear like summer flowers in
autumn. Many a man has made flimsy
linseywoolsey of himself by striving to
weave too large a figure, and is worn out,
used up, like old carpets hanging on the
fence r before he has lived out half of his
allotted days of usefulness. Many a man
wears out like a carpet that is never
swept, by the dust of indolence ; like that
carpet he needs shaking or whipping ;
he needs activity—something to think of
—something to do.
Look out, then for the large figures, and
there are those now stowed away in the
garret of the world, awaiting their final
consignment to the cellar, who had they
practiced this bit of carpet philosophy,
would to-day be firm and bright as Brus
sels fresh from the loom and everybody ex
claiming,' it is wonderful how they do
wear.'
THE DEVIL'S CHOICEST SERVANTS.-A
'Taper was picked up in the streets last
night by a person returning from hearing
the three eminent divines' spout in Li
brary Hall. It is supposed to be a free
translation from Luther, and reads as fol
lows :
The Devil, as is his onstom once a year,
held an examination to see which of his
imps had labored most faithfully in his
service. Calling them together, he ques
tioned them as to what they had performed.
I said one, raised a mighty whirlwind,
which blew the sand of the desert upon a
caravan of Christian pilgrims, and they all
perished. '
Pooh ! said the Devil, t what of that,
if their-souls were all saved.'
6 I,' said another,' stink a ship load of
Christians, and they were all lost.'
Bat their souls were all saved, so that
did me no good,' replied the Devil, con
temptuously.
And I,' said another, have not been
idle in that part of America from whiohyour
majesty has often regretted receiving so
few subjects. I have cultivated the most
intimate acquaintance with many of their
divines, and have persuaded them to drop
the Bible and take up war politics, and
they are having a vast influence among the
oiroles which have been wont'p look to
them for advice.'
'Ha ! ha !' laughed. the Devil,' you are
the smartest imp of them all, and shall
haie the' highest place in-my favor. /see
I shall have no cause to complain of that
country being unproductive to my king
dom hereafter. '--Xewark Journal.-
/11.7" , The lieart,that soars upward es
itspes rlittleLoarsi-and vexations ; birds
'that fly high have net the dtist - of the road
upon their wings.
MAINENIG THE CHILD'S BODY.- What
ever you wish your child to be, be it
yourself. If you wish it to, be happy, so
ber, truthful, affectionate, honest and god
ly, be all these yourself. If you wish it
to_be lazy and sulky and a liar and a
thief, and a drunkard and a swearer, be
yourself all these. As the old cook crows
the young one learns. You remember who
said, train up a child in the way he should
go, and when he is old he will not depart
from it.' And yon may as well expect to
gather grapes from thorns, and figs from
thistles, as good, healthy, happy children,
from diseased, and lazy, and wicked pa
rents. Be always frank and open to your
children. Make them feel at ease with you,
and make with. them. There is no such
good plaything for grown up children,
like you and me, as weans —wee ones. /t
is wonderful what you can get them to do,
with a little fun and coaxing. You all
know this as well as I do, and you will prac
tice it every day in your own families.
Here is a pleasant story out of an old
book :—A gentleman having led a compa
ny of children beyond their usual journey,
they began to be weary, and all cried to
him to carry them on his back; but be
cause of their multitude he could not do,
that, But 'said he , 'll get horses for
us all;' then cutting little wands out of
the hedges as ponies for them ; and a great
stake,
,as a charger for himself, thus put
mettle into their little legs, and all then
rode cheerfuly home. So much for a bit
of ingenious fun.
A SINGULAR CONTEST-TWO gentle
men of high birth, the one a Spaniard and
the other a German, having rendered
Maximilian 11 many services, they each
for recompense, demanded his natural
daughter Helena in marriage. The
prince, who entertained an equal respect
for them both, could not give either the
preference ; and after, much delay, told
them that from claims they both had to
his attention and regard he could not give
his consent for either of them to marry his
daughter, and they must pecide it by their
own prowess and address, but as he did not
wish to risk the loss of either, or both; by
suffering them to fight with offensive wea
pons, he had ordered a large bag to be
brought,and he who was successful enough
to put his rival into it should obtain his
daughter. This strange combat between
two gentlemen was in the presence of the
whole imperial court and lasted half an
hour. At length the Spaniard yielded to
the German, and Andre Elhard, Baron of
Tetherd, who, when he got him into the
bag, took him on his back and placed him
at the Emperor's feet, and on the follow
ing day married the beautiful Helena.
THE. LANCASTER INTELLIGENCER
JOB PRINTING ESTABLISHMENT,
No. 8 NORTH DUKE STREET, LANCASTER, PA.
The Jobbing Department is thoroughly furnished with
new and elegant type of every description, and is under
the charge of a practical and experienced Job Printer:—
The - Proprietors are prepared to
PRINT CHECKS,
NOTES, LEGAL BLANKS,
CARDS AND CIRCULARS,
BILL HEADS AND HANDBILLS,
PROGRAMMES AND POSTERS,
PAPER BOOKS AND PAMPHLETS,
BALL TICKETS AND INVITATIONS,
PRINTING IN COLORS AND PLAIN PRINTING,
with neatness, accuracy and dispatch, on the most reasons
ble terms,and in a manner not excelled by any establish
ment in he city.
.GN Orders from a distance, by mail or otherwise
promptly attended to. Address
GEO. SANDERSON .t SON,
Intelligencer Office,
No. 8 North Duke street, Lancaster, Pa.
SOHETHING FOR THE TIDIES II 1
A NECESSITY IN EVERY HOUSEHOLD I I I
JOHNS @ CROSLET'S
AMERICAN CEMENT GLUE,
THE STRONGEST GLEE IN THE WORLD
FOR CEMENTING WOOD, LEATHER, GLASS, IVORY,
CHINA, MARBLE, PORCELAIN, ALABASTER,
BONE, CORAL, &c., &c., &c.
The only article of the kind ever produced which will
withstand Water.
EXTRACTS
" Every housekeeper should have a supply of Johns &
Crosley's American Cement Glue."—Noto York Time:.
"It is so convenient to have in the house."—Neto York
Zvi:mess.
"It is always ready; this commends it to everybody."—
N. Y. Independent.
" We have tried it, and find it as useful in our house as
water."—Wines' Spirit of the Times.
PRICE TWENTY—FIVE CENTS PER BOTTLE.
Very Liberal Reductions to Wholesale Dealers.
TERMS CASH.
Ai' For sale by all Druggists anti Storekeepers generally
throughout the country.
JOHNS & °BOSLEY,
(Sole Mannfacturerej
;8 WILLIAM ST., (Corner of Liberty St.,) NEW YORK
fl 1928
OURL YOUR HAIR!
BEAUTIFY YOURSELF,
BY ÜBING
CHAPPELL'S HYPERION FOR CIIRLING THE HAIR.
The Ladies and Gentlemen throughout the world will
be pleased to learn that I have recently discovered an
article that will Carl the Hair.
By using CELAPPELL'S HYPERION, Ladies and Gentle
men can beautify themselves a-thousand fold.
CHAPPELL'S HYPERION is the only article In the
world that will Carl straight Hair. The only article that
will Curl the Hair IN BEAUTIFUL CURLS I
IN GLOSSY CURLS!
IN SILKEN CURLS!
IN FLAXEN CURLS
IN PLOWING CURLS!
IN WAVING CURLS
;,IN LUXURIANT CURLS
It makes the Hair soft and glossy. It invigorates the
Han. It beautifies the Hair. It cleanses the Hair. It
has a most delightful perfume.
It prevents the Hair from falling off; it fastens it to the
scalp. It Is the only article ever yet discovered that will
curt straight Hair in beautiful curls, without injury to the
Hair or scalp.
The HYPERION does not In any manner Interfere with
the
NATURAL SOFTNESS OF THE HAIR.
It neither scorches nor dries it; The HYPERION can be
so applied as to cause the Hair to curl for one day, or for,
one week, or for one month, or any longer period desired.
The HYPERION la the only article in the world but
what can be counterfeited or imitated by nprinclpled per
sons. To prevent this, we do not offer It for sale at any
Druggist's In the United States.
Therefore, any Lady or Gentleman ivtio desires to
beautify themselves by using the ItYPERION, must in
close the PRICE, ONE DOLL SW in a letter, and
Address, W. CIIAPPELL & CO.,
Parkman, Geauga
And It will be (usefullyß ox
sen by return mall. Co., Ohio,
nor 12 ly 44
"THESE IS NO SUCH WORD AS SAIL."
T ARB.AN T'S
COMPOUND EXSRACIT Or
CUBEBS AND COPAIRA
This preparation Is particularly recommended to the
MEDICAL PROFESSION and the PUBLIC, as combining,
in the molt convenient and efficacious form, the well.
established virtues and properties of Cubebe and Copalba.
For the speedy and effectual relief and cure of all SEXUAL
DISEASES, it may justly be considered one of the greatest
and moat valuable discoveries fn the annals of medicine,
frequently effecting a cure in three or four days. In Its
preparation as an extract or a paste, the usual nauseous
taste is avoided, and It is, consequently, never found to
Interfere with the digestion, while, from its greeter on
centratfon, the dose Is much reduced. It may be relied on
as the best mode for the administration of these remedies
in the large class of diseases of troth sexes to which they
are applicable.
N. 8.--eForchasers ale advised to ask for
TARRANT'S COMPOUND EXTRACT OF MESS AND
COPIABA,
and to take nothing else—as imitations and worthless
preparations, under !similar names, Are In the market.
Pamphlets accompany the medicine, containing full and
ample directions. Price, $l.OO. Sent by express on receipt
of price.
Prepared and sold wholesale and retail, by
TARRANT Jr 00.,
No. 278 Gummi= Eraser, COHN= or W63l(lat Bun;
NEW YORK,
And For Sale by Druggists Generally.
apr 22 ly 15
UNITED. STATES STAMP TAXES 1211.
lj POSED BY THE ACT OF 1862.
Pablished for the convenience of STORWKEEPERS,
MERCHANTS, BROKERS, LAWYERS, CONVEYANCERS
and the public generally, on a large neat card showing
a glance, the amount of duty on tax to be paid. Price
amts. For sale by J. 154: WESTHARFFER,
No. 44, Corner of North Queen and Orange streets.
Oct 7 tf
•
- 100 El 0 T. B. A. P A T
IN ALL. ITS . BDANOICE&.• -
Located tn the beet style known in the art; et
AN-o'B G.ALL..B.H.Y
• US Aeon Araktr, Bear or ihrota, PHEUDILPHIA,
' - 10.6411312,11'1N OIL AND P
BTE.REOSCOPIO POST72AITS,
Ambrotypee, Daguerreotypes, Ao., for Oases, hledallions
4 10 . fmar le 91y
ILLUSTRATED
BOZZATTIFIC A MSSIOAN.
THE BEST MECHANICAL PAPER IN THE WORLD.
laanTßENrn YEAR.
voLumr. Tur.—NEW emu.
A new volume of thin populir Journal commences on
the first of January. It 1B rillb/iShed weekly, and every
number contains sixteen llama useful information, and
from five to ten original engravings of new Inventions*
discoveries, all of which are prepared erpresaly fbr
columns.
TO THE MECHANIC AND MANDBACITUREIL
No person engaged in any of the mechanical or EMU.
factoring pursuits should think of "doing without" the
Scientific American. It mats but six cents per week
every number contains from sit to ten engravings of new
machines and inventions, which can not be found in any
other publication.
TO THE INVENTOR.
The Scientific American in indispensable to aver'
venter, as it not only contains illustrated deacriptdons of
nearly all the beet inventions as they come out, but each
number contains an Official List of the. Claims of all the
Patents leaned from the United States Patent Office during
the week previous ; thus giving a correct history of the
progress of'inventions in this country. We are also re
ceiving, every week, the beet scientific journals of Great
Britain, France and Germany; thus placing in our posses
sion all that is transpiring in mechanical science and art
in these old countries. We shall continue to trander to
our columns copious extracts flom.these journals of what
ever we may deem of interest td our readers.
A pamphlet of instruction as to the beet mode of ob
taining Letters Patent on new Inventions, Is furnished
free on application.
Messrs. MUNN at Co., have acted as Patent Solicitors for
more than seventeen years, In connection with the publi
cation of the Scientific American, and they refer to 20,000
patentees for whom they have done business.
No charge is made for examining sketches and models of
new inventions and for advising inventors as to their
patentability.
CHEMISTS, ARCHITECTS, MILLWRIGHTS AND
FARMERS
The Scientific American will be, found a moat useful
journal to them. All the new discoveries in the acienoe of
chemistry are giving in its columns, and the interests of
the architect and carpenter ale not overlooked; all the new
inventions and discoveries appertaining to these pursuits
being published from week to week. Useful and practical
Information pertaining to the interests of millwrights and
millowners will be found in the Scientific American, which
information they can not possibly obtain from any other
source. Subjects in which farmers are interested will be
found discussed in the Scientific American; most of the
Improvements in agricultural Implements being illustrated
in its columns.
TERISIB
To mall subscribers: Three Dollars a year, or One Dollar
for four months. The volumes commence on the first of
January and July. Specimen copies will be sent gratis to
any part of the country.
Western and Canadian money or Post-oflice stamps take
at par for subscriptions. Canadian subscribers will pleas
to remit twenty-five cents extra on each year's subscrl
Non to pre-pay postage. MUNN Jr CO.,
Publishers, B 7 Park Row, N. Y.
tf 49
GODRIVS LADY'S HOOK FOR 1863.
GREAT LITERARY AND PICTORIAL YEAR.
The publisher of Glodey's Lady's Book, Mukha to that
public which 116/3 enabled him to publish a magazine for
the last thirty-three years of a larger circulation than any
in America, has made an arrangement with the most port
ler authoress in this country—
MARION HARLAND,
Authoress of "Alone," "Hidden Path," "Moss Side,"
"Nemesis," and " Miriam,"
who will furnish a story for every number of the Lady's
Book for 1883. This alone will place the Lady's Book in a
literary point of view far ahead of any other magazine.
Marion Harland writes for no other publication. Our other
favorite writers will all continuo to furnish articles
throughout the year.
THE REST LADY'S bIAGAZINE IN TRH WORLD, AND
VIE CHEAPEST.
THE LITERATURE
is of that kind that can be read aloud In the family circle,
and the clergy in Immense numbers are subscribers for the
Book.
TIEIE MUSIC
Is all original, and would cost 25 cents (the price of the
Book) in the music stores; but most of It la copyrighted,
and cannot bo obtained except in "Godey."
OUR STEEL ENGRAVINGS.
All efforts to rival no in this have ceased, and we now
stand alone in this department, giving, as we do, many
more and infinitely better engravings than are published
in any other work.
GOREY'S IMMENSE DOUBLE SHEET FABBION
PLATES.
00 NTAINING
From five to seven fall length Colored Fashions on each
plate. Other magazines give only two.
FAR AHEAD OF ANY FASHIONS IN EUROPE OR
Godey's is the only work In the world that gives these
Immense plates, alitl they are such as to have excited the
wonder of publishers and the public. The publication of
theseplates cost
$10:000 MORE
. ....
than fashion.plates of the old style. and nothing but our
wonderfully large circulation enable' tof to give them.
Other magazines cannot afford it. We never spare money
when the public can be benefited.
These fashions may be rolled on. Dresses may be made
after them, and the wearer will not subject herself to ridin
rule, as would be the case if she visited the large cities
dressed after the style of the plates given in some of our
so-called magazines.
OIIR WOOD ENGRAVINGS,
of which we give twice or three times as many as any other
magazine, are often mistaken for steel. They are so far
superior o any oth re.
IMITATIONS
Beware of thorn. Remember that the Lady's Book is the
original publication and the cheapest. If you take Godey,
you want no other magazine.
Everything that is useful or ornamental in a house can
be found in Godey.
DRAWING LESSONS.
No other magazine gives them, and we have enough to
fill several large volumes.
. . . .
OUR RECEIPTS
are such as can be found nowhere else. Cooking in ;all its
variety—Confectionery—the Nursery—the Tollet--the
Laundry—the Kitchen. Receipts upon all subjects are to
be found in the pages of the Lady's Book. We originally
started this department, and have peculiar facilities for
making it most perfect. This department alone Is worth
the price of the Book.
.. •
. .
LADIES' WORK TABLE.
. _
This department comprises engravings and descriptions
of every article that a lady wears.
MODEL, COTTAGES.
No other magazine has this department.
TERMS: CASH IN ADVANCE
One copy one year, P. Two copies one year, $5. Three
copies one year, $B. Four copied one year $7.
Five copies one year, and an extra copy to the person
sending the club, $lO.
Eight copies one year, and an extra copy to the person
sending the club, $l5.
Eleven copies one year, and an extra , copy to the person
sending the club, $2O.
And the only magazine that can be introduced Into the
above clubs in place of the Lady's Book is Arthur's Home
Magazine.
SPECIAL CLUBBING WITH OTIIKEI; MAGAZZINZEI.
Godey's Lady's Book and Arthur's Home Magazine both
one year for $360.
Godey'a Lady's Book and Harper's Magazine both one' year
for $4.60.
Gutsy, Harper, and Arthur will all three be sent one year,
on receipt of $5.00.
Treasury Notes and Notes of all solvent banks taken at
par.
Be careful and pay the postage on your letter.
Address, L. A. GODECY,
323 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia, Pa:
6m-41
T HE DAILY EVENING JOURNAL
LAR THX
WEEKLY DEMOCRATIC LEADER
These Democratic papers, lately published by Albert D.
Boileau, (whose connection therewith has entirely ceased,)
are now published and edited by CHARLES N. PINE and
ALFRED E. LEWIS, and will, hereafter, be conducted fear-
lessly, as caoess or res GREAT DEMOCRATIC ream. They
will defend the principles of the Constitution, the RIGHTS
OF 101 STATES, and the liberties of the people.
The Evening Journal is published every afternoon, (Sun
day's excepted,) at $6 per annum, or $3 for six months,
payable in advance. It contains spirited articles on the
political questions of the day, with all .the current news,
Market and Stock reports, and all such 'matter as is usual
ly found in a Daily Newspaper.
The Weekly Democratic Leader Is a large doubleaheet
paper, containing eight pages, followingus of read
ing matter, and is furnished at therates:
Single Copies, one year, $2.00
Two " 3.50
Three "
Five 44 44
Twenty 44 -
Thirty "
Fifty "
The Democrats of Pennsylvania, Maryland, Delaware,
and New Jersey, it is hoped will exert themselves to - give
the LEADER a large circulation. Address
PINE A LEWIS,
No. 100 South Third St., Philadelphia.
JEir Write for sample numbers, which will be promptly
furnished, gratis.
Country newspapers publishing the above advertleemmt
shall be entitled to the DAILY EVENING JOURNAL ih
exchange. P. & L.
mar 24 2t 12
H AIR. DRESSINGSHAVING
SAMUEL J. WILLIAMS takes pleamtre in notifying his
numerous friends and customers, that be has removed lib
Saloon from Cooper'e Hotel to the teuseuient wader. Peter
fl'Conomy's Shoe Store, in West King • street, near the
Morkot House, and has fitted it up in newand elegant style
or the accommodation of customers. . .
HAIR DRESSING, SHAVING-AND IGIA3IPOONING
done In the m•et scientific and fashionable style, and his
tonsorial operations are performed with the greatest ease
and comfort to all concerned.
He will also color the hair and whiskers, and guarantee
the colors to be applied without injury to either.
Give the Professor a call, and he flatters himself that he
will be able to render general malefaction:
Air Don't make a mistake and get into the wrong shop.
Recollect, it is immediately under APOonerny's Shoe Store.
apr 15 tf S. J. WILLIAMS.
HE AMERICAN ANNUAL CYCLO.
T
P.MDLA AND REGISTER OF IMPORTANT EMITS
OF THE YEAR 1881.
Embracing Political, Civil, Military and Social 'Affairs;
Public Documents; Biography, Statistics, Com-
mere" Finance, Literature, Scienee, Agri
culture and Mechanical Lulu/dry.-
The volume will be in the style of the New American
Cyclopedia, having not lees than 750 pages, royal gm
The work will be published exclusively by subscription
and Its exterior appearance will beat once elegant and cub
stantial. D. APPLETON kOO., New York.
BUM! BARR & 00.,
No. 8 East King atreet, •
Agt's for Lancaster City and Co
apr 15 tf 14]
MIME BODIIG.G.ER. • .
I This wonderful article, Just patented; is :something
entirely new, and never before offered. to agents,. who are
wanted everywhere. tall particulars sent fTN, -
Address • SHAW CLARK,
apt 213 Bithisibrd. Mdse.
'UT ANTEED•eGIOLD, S ILVER Aigrx;pz
'vy MAIM NOTES, for which the NIGHEST
UM will be pald at the Banking Ho be ; .
REEDi BENDEBSON & CO.
Lancaster, Feb. 7,'63. • 10 tf 6
NO. 21.