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'"'rM LANOASTER INTELUGENOER.
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BY GKO. BAIDBaSOH.
IIBUBi
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KATIE LEE AND WILLIE GRAY.
Two brown heads with tossing curls,
Bedlips shutting oyer pearls,
Bare feet white and wet with dew,
Two eyes black and two eves blue;
Little boy and girl were they,
Katie Lee and Willie Gray.
They were standing where a brook,
Bending like a shepherd's crook,
Jlasheaits stiver; and thick ranks
Of green willow fringed the banks;
Half in thought and half in play,
Katie Lee and Willie Gray.
They had cheeks like cherries red;
He was taller—'most a head;
She, with arms like wreaths of snow,
Swung a basket to and fro,
As she loitered half in play,
Chattering to Willie Gray.
“Pretty Katie," Willie said—
And there came a flash of red
Through the brownness of his cheek—
“ Boys are strong and girls are weak,
And I'll carry, so I will,
Katie’s basket up the hill.”
Katie answered, with a laugh,
“You shall oarry only half;"
And then, tossing back her curls,
“Boys are weak as well as girls."
Bo you think that Katie guessed
Half the wisdom she expressed ?
Hen are only boys grown toll,
Hearts don't change much, after all;
And when, long years from that day.
Katie Lee and Willie Gray
Stood again beside the brook,
Bending like a shepherd’s crook—
Is it strange that Willie said,
While again a dash of red
Crosfaed the brownness of his cheek—
“l am strong and you are weak;
Life is but a slippery steep,
Hung with shadows cold and deep:
“Will you trust me, Katie dear ?
Walk beside me without fear;
May I carry, if I will,
All your burdens up the hill?”
And she answered with a laugh,, 1
“No, but you may carry half."
Close beside the little brook, v
Bending like a shepherd’s crook.
Washing with its silver hands
Late and early'at the sands,
Is a cottage where, to-day,
Katie lives with Willie Gray.
In a porch she sits, and lo!
Swings a basket to and fro,’
Vastly different from the one
That she swung in years agone;
This is long, and deep, and wide,
And has —rockers at the side!
AN EDITOR WANTED,
BY J. PARISH STEELE.
We have been without a paper
In our town a year or more;
Though we’ve had of printers plenty,.
And of editors a score.
J3ome of them were “jam up” fellows,
Good at writing, good to plan;
But they all, without exception,
Failed in—pleasing every man !
For this mighty sin we “shipped" them ;
Now, we’re sending forth a call
For an editor to join us
Who will write to please us all;
Others need not ask for favor,
For of such we’ve had our fill;
We will heed no applications
Save from those who fill the bill.
Well I mind the first among ns—-
He wsb by no means the worst—
Bat we didn’t seem to like him,
Simply ’oause—he was the first;
For, yon know it is the custom,
Jnst to saorifioe a few;
So we placed our heels upon him,
Ere we knew what he could do-
Next there came a gifted fellow,.
"With a prepossessing way,
Who, but for a fatal blunder,
Would have, doubtless, won the day
Blank, a crafty village merchant,
Bought a “puff” to gain a “lift,”
’Twas offensive—other merchants
Sent the editor a-drift.
Next we sent a learned committee
To a man in Baltimore,
Whom we knew to be a writer,
Full of canning, full of lore :
They solioited, he yielded,
Game, delighted young and old;
But he got in debt, and toddled,
Leaving us “the bag to hold.”
Then a host of others followed,
Lived a while, and passed away;
Leaving this, our thriving village,
Minus of a press to-day ;
Henoo, we send this little notice,
Knowing that some fellow oan
Make a fortune here among ua
Just by—PLEASING EVERY MAN.
SPEECH OF
HON. WM. A. RICHARDSON,
OF ILLIISrOIS,
At the Democratic Mass Convention, held
at Indianapolis, lnd., July 30, 1862.
My Fellow-Citizens : It has been my
pride and pleasure frequently to allude fco
the greatness of our country, and the 'pros
perity and happiness of our people. The
sun of heaven never shone on a people bo
prosperous and happy as we were two years
ago. Our people, from three millions had
increased to be thirty millions. From a
little line of population along the Atlantic,
we had grown and spread until our shores
were washed by two oceans. We had
stretched out our arms from the lakes of
the North to the tiulf of Mexico. We
embraoed every quality of soil and every
kind of production. The sails of our com
merce whitened every sea, and the happy
American tar, standing upon the deck of
his vessel, looked proudly up at the stars
and stripes floating gloriously above him,
and felt that in that flag he had safety and
protection everywhere. Around every fire
side were contentment, happiness and
plenty. But what is the soene that meets
our eyes at the present time ? From the
plow and from the anvil—from physician's
office and from the halls of justice —we are
hurrying to arms.
The Union has assumed theappearanoe of
one vast military camp. The tax-gatherer,
too, will soon be upon us, to wring from us
our substance. There are.grave and' im
portant questions for us to decide. How
can we return to that happiness and pros
perity which we once enjoyed ? I would
answer, it can only be done by enforcing
everywhere the Constitution as it is and
the Union as it was. Whatever amount
of power is neoessary, and in whatever
form, to enforce that principle, ought to be
and must be employed. A rebellion em
bracing thousands of our former fellow
pitizens now arrayed in arms against the
government must be put down by force of
arms. And at the same time that this is
being done for the rebellion in the South, !
that class of our fellow-citizens in other,
parts of the country who are seeking, by
other means, than those cf cannon shot and.
bayonets to destroy the government, must
be driven out of place and power, and
other men, who will acknowledge their ob
ligations and perform their duty to the
country, must.be put in their places.
To accomplish that object depends upon
yon and upon me, but more upon yon than
S °t e ‘ - Yo £ have t 0 be B in 1116 work
xmht here. If you have already begun
this work, as I trust in God youha^ei : let
;a#s«.to ,• e^.r :jrj S i •^@s«!as®.-6S£J.fe«f^.. j »sfcsiasK <
f ine urge yon, to keep Itupby every means
in yonr the govern
ment, the very existence of the country
depends upon.it.
I am aware, my fellow-citizens, that
those persons who have deceived yon here
tofore wtil.endeavor to do it again.. Thoy
always promise what your interests seem to
demand, but.their performance is very poor.
Let us inquire a little into the past his
tory of;these see. whether they
deserve to be trusted for the future. You
remember that a few.years ago we warned
the people that the formation of seotibn'al
parties was dangerous to the Union and the
Constitution. You will recolleot that these
men then sneeringly said to us that we were
‘Constitution and Union savers.’- They
told you then that all Onr talk about dan
ger to the Union and the Constitution was
the merest braggadooia. They asserted
that there was no danger of the South
seceding—that you oonld not get them ont
of the Union-their slaves would rise up and
murder them. Well, we did not find that
exaotly the case, did we ? These men
cheated you then, didn’t they? Some of
them cheated themselves ; others, and by
far the largest portion of the party did not,
although they cheated yon.
Well, we passed along aa usual, and
what turned up next ? When there began
to be .sighs of trouble in the, /Southern
country, we conservative men stepped for
ward and said, ‘ Let us compromise.’ They
replied, ‘No; we.will never compromise
with rebels in arms!’ ;. They professed the
profoundest contempt for the South—said
our women should go down there and drive
them all together into the Southern ocean
—it was a mere breakfast spell.. Again
they oheated you. Again they proved
false prophets, and, like false prophets of
old, they ought all to’be stoned to death.
[Cheers .and laughter.] No ; they would
not compromise.. They wanted a little
blood-letting—it was absolutely neoessary
for future peace. They. said it would
not oome to much; these people down
South would not fight at all. And when
at length your President called for an army
of seventy-five thousand men, you were
told that they would make rapid work of
the rebellion. It woulj be annihilated at
a single blow. So said these men. Well,
how does the matter stand now ? We have
already mustered in six hundred and
ninety-three thousand, and still there is
room for more. [Laughter.] Ah, my
friends, these men were never more mis
taken in their lives than when they assumed
to plaoe such a slight value upon the
strength of the rebellion and the oourage
of the people of the South. It is no par
ticular credit to any Amerioan to say that
he will fight; that is one quality that is
common to the whole Amerioan race. They
have always displayed that characteristic
Wherever they have been. These men,
therefore, when they told you that South
ern people would not fight, either did not
exaotly understand the subjeot, or they
wilfully misled you.
Well, what next? They oome now,rafter
they have found out that the Southern
soldiers will fight, they come to you again
and ory: ‘We have been mistaken this
time, but we have it now—just arm the
negroes, aud the work will be finished in
short order.’ Fellow-citizens, as often as
I hear a man talk in that way, I oome to
the conclusion that he wants to find some
excuse for changing the issue so as to get
someone else to do the fighting. He don’t
want to volunteer. [Laughter.] No man
of common intelligence oan be induoed to
believe that the negro, naturally an inferior
race, and debased by ignorance as he is,
can ever compete with the white man upon
the battle-field, any more than he can any
where else. Set them against each other,
three to one, and the white man will be all
the time the viotor.
In Mexioo, where our soldiers fought a
.mixed raoe, they were victorious on every
battle-field, although outnumbered in the
ratio of five to one. Now, if the Afrioan
is afraid of anything on this earth, it is
gunpowder. In what estimation oan you
hold that man who tells, you that the
liberty, independence and constitutional
government of the oountry depend upon a
few miserable, ignorant, cowardly negroes.
We have a population of twenty millions
of white people, and immense wealth;
properly directed, we are capable -of beat
ing any army the world ever saw or ever
will see, and he who has the effrontery to
say that we. o'annot maintain our govern
ment without the help of negroes utters a
libel upon the American nation.
It is false that slavery is the cause of
the present unfortunate condition of things.
The cause does not lie there ; it lies in
another plaoe. The mischievous legisla
tion of these Abolitionists 'in Congress is
the cause and the only., cause. I speak
plainly, but 1 speak precisely what I think.
Now, one thing:
When we met one year ago in Congress,
both branches pledged themselves that
the war should be proseouted for the pres
ervation of the Union and the Constitu
tion, and for that alone. All of these
Abolitionists either voted for the resolution
which was adopted embodying that senti
ment, or ran out of the House to avoid
voting at all. Well, the resolution was
adopted. The President issued his call
for volunteers and six hundred and ninety
three thousand rushed to arms, upon the
faith of the solemn pledge whioh Congress
had given to the people. Time rolled on,
and sucoess seemed to smile upon our
efforts. Our Western armies had won
great and glorious victories. The South
ern people were still divided. Just at this
juncture Congress meets. The dominant
party goes immediately to work to undo
all the wise legislation of the called ses
sion. Every proposition that is brought
forward is for the negro. It soon became,
apparent that the majority in Congress was
no longer bound by the Constitution. In
stead of ooming forward with measures of
peaoe and conciliation, they come with
confiscation, fire and sword, and by these
measures they at once fired and united the
hearts of the Southern people.
Thus far we conservative men had gone
ba.nd in hand with these hypocrites, in good
faith; but here we left them. . We parted
from them with great sorrow and pain.—'
Then it was that I became satisfied that
the majority controlling Congress medita
ted the destrno.tion.of the government—
that they preferred a divided government,
with ohanoes of power and plunder.
History is full of examples that go to
show that governments are never destroy
ed by means of'eitheruebeliion or foreign
: foes without some fault on the part of their
: .own rulers. : You may turn to Scripture
and you will ; find , numerous instances in
* fm.rnvm&gm-imQX
« TBAX ootnrasr IB rai poof FBOSPEtOUSWHIULABOS OOUAHSS THI aiwi»T> ». .wimitwi«. ■
T.ANCASTER OfTY. PA.. TtfESTUY MORNING. ATHHIST 26.1862.
point. The. children of Isr&el were not,
nor could they have been, divided', by the
wickedness of Jeroboam,-the eon of Nebat,
who rebelled against.the government; but
it required the' mad folly of Behoboam,
their rightful sovereign, to divide them.
When the wise men who had been for
many years the faithful advisers of : his.
father came to Behoboam, and-endeavored
to persuade.him to respect the rights of
; all his subjeets and administer the govern
ment without ‘partiality to any, his answer
was : ‘My father lashed you with whips,
but I will lash you with soorpions, and my
’little finger shall be thicker than my fath
er’s-thigh.’ From that day forward Israel
was a divided kingdom, shorn of its glory
and of its power. This last Congress has
done for. ns, ais. far as was in their power,
the very samfc’ ; thing that Behoboam did
for the kingdom of Israel.
As I have said before, one year ago
there was a large Union sentiment in the-
South. In view of this faot, what should
have been our policy ? Should we not
have endeavored to convince these people
that beneath the flag of their oountry all
their rights of property wereseoure? I.
do not know how you are going'to recon
struct this Union without some basis to
plaoe it upon. Such basis we might have
had in this strong Union element at the
South. Who does not know that two
thirds of thet’seoeded States were carried
into the wiokedness of secession absolute
ly without the consent of the people and
against tHeir will ?
The hearts of these people were for the
old government, in whioh they had always
trusted, and the old constitution whioh
they had always revered. Suppose our
policy had been to foster and enoourage,
instead of driving off that 'Union senti
ment. There would have been no army
in the field to-day. But, in lieu of that
policy of conciliation which would have
been our salvation, we adopted the polioy
of meeting all with fire ahd sword, and the
fatal oonsequenoes are not yet all told.
Now, I agree that it is right and proper
in every government that, where you put
down rebellion like this, you should pun
ish the leaders, but no government ever
adopted the polioy in relation to the peo
ple themselves that ours has. A few years
ago the Hungarians rebelled against Aus
tria. That is one of the most despotic
governments on the faoe of the globe.—
The government succeeded in overthrow
ing the rebellion—how ? They exeouted
a few leaders, sent the remainder into
exile, and passed amnesty to the residue
who wear not leaders in the rebellion.—
There never was a government that has
not uniformly let the burden fall upon the
leaders, while the great mass of the people
were permitted to return and resume their
allegiance to the government. And I
will venture to assert that if, after the
battle of Fort Donelson, the government
had adopted this polioy of conciliation,
there would have been no rebel army in
the field to-day. But, instead of that
being the case, they are at this moment
confronting us with an army more numer
ous and superior to our own, and we are
compelled to oall for more volunteers.—
Now, the volunteering now going on, in
view of the doubt already oast upon the
subject, stands fair; but it is not evident
that our people are rushing to arms with
the spirit and in such numbers as they did
when the former oall was made, when there
was a hope that the war was to be oonduot
ed upon more humane and conservative
principles. In this State and in Illinois
we shall probably succeed after a while in
raising our quota of volunteers, but in
many of the States they will be forced to
draft. The Congressional legislation of
late has been fatal to us in every way.
I hear a good deal said now and then
about the ‘statesmen’ of this Kepublican
party, but I have never been able to put
my finger upon any of their statesmanship.
1 have served along with them in Con
gress, and I have found it. invariably the
oase that, whenever any man called by
their name begins to rise to the position
of a true statesman, they orowd him out
of the ranks. Take Mr. Cowan, of Penn
sylvania, as an example. They hate that
man worse and denounoe him more bitterly
even than they do me ; for they say Bioh
ardson is an old sinner anyhow, and they
do not expect muoh of him.
I am afraid that when the future histo
rian oomes to write of our times, as he will
do, he will group these men, with respect
to statesmanship, and will say, ‘ Here is a
set of one idea fools, who permitted the
government handed down to them by their
forefathers to fall to the ground, rather
than give up an absurd notion whioh could
never be carried out.’
You oannot administer government suc
cessfully with one idea, and let me tell
you that these men, when, in the pursuit
of their one idea, they oome to make the
negro do everything and have everything,
dwindle down, down, down, until thoy be
oome inoapable of anything like true
statesmanship. Last winter when I saw
my venerable friend here from Kentucky,
together with Mr. Crittenden—men who
had associated in days gone by with Clay
and Webster and Benton—-occupying seats
upon the floor of Congress amongst these
intellectual pigmies and one-idea men, the
poetry of Moore suggested itself very for
cibly to my mind as peculiarly applicable
to their situation:
“ I feel like one who treads alone,
Some banquet flail deserted,
Whose lights are gone, whose guests are fled,
And all but he departed.”
When we pass into the pages of history,
as we soon shall, I fear that not one of all
the representatives of the republican party
nowin Congress will ever have been found
to have produced a paper—to have been
guilty of a thought—that is worthy of the
great cause and great interest's that are
committed to their charge.
Now, if you send these men baok to
Congress, the history of the Republic is
written. Our. days are numbered, and we
are numbered with the past. Infamously,
ingloriously, without a straggle, we passed
away, and became ‘a school’s boy’s tale—
the wonder of an hour.’
I have heard a good deal said about the
* conservatives Republicans in Congress.’
These so called conservatives are excellent
men, judging ■ them by what theysay ;
indeed, they, folk the best to vote so badly
of any set of men I ever. saw. Wo did
think at .first that your-Representative from
this Congressional district would vote with
us all the time, but we were sadly disap
pointed when the time for talking passed
by and he was called upon to vote.; That
is the way with all these men. For a time
{hey would make good Union speeches,
•~«*y*sistes.av- ifws
talking-tolermbly conservative all the time,
and voting just exaotlylike Lovejoy.and
his friends. : . . T . V
1 oame to the same conclusion about
these ‘ conservative ’ Bepublioans ‘ that a
Yankee once came to. in regard to the
Siamese .twins.,, The had
come to Boston, and the old Yankee .had
paid his money and-went into-the show.
130 examined-the ligament that bound the
young, men together, and,-as soon as he
had satisfied himself that it was a real
thing, and no humbug, he said, ‘ Well I
rather guess them fellows are brothers.’
Just so, my fellow citizens, I have been
compelled to oonolude.that these ‘ conser
vative’ Bepublioans and Abolitionists are
brothers; - [Cheers and laughter.] One is
about as bad as the other, or, if there is
any difference, it is in favor of the Aboli
tionists. Lovejoy. i avowed his policy. I
like a bold man. If he is wrong in prin
ciple, I can at least admire the : oourage
which enables him to avow himself. I
always could understand Lovejoy, but I
never could understand your Representa
tive from this Congressional distriet.—
[Laughter.] If, during the last Presiden
tal eleotion, these ‘ conservative ’ Bepub
lioans had avowed the sentiments they ex
pressed by their votes, the country would
not have been in the condition it is at
present. Now, let me urge you, if you are
going to send Bepublioans to Congress at
all, let us have full-blooded fellows, and
none of these men who talk one way and
vote another. I know Lovejoy will not
cheat me. I hate to be oheated, so I
would rather have the full-blooded Aboli
tionists to deal with. I understand their
position. The danger of the oountry arises
not from these men, beoause you oan strip
them; but arises from these ‘conservatives,’
falsely so oalled.'
There is a olass of men who are always
very busy—who go about the oountry de
nouncing every man who does not agree
with them as a traitor to the oountry.
You talk to one of these men, and what
he is for, and he will toll you, if he tells
the truth', that he is for diverting this war
from its legitimate objeot, so as to make it
a war of emancipation. Ask him then—
‘ Are you for the Constitution ? He will
answer, ‘Ob, no ; the Constitution is played
out; the South has overthrown the Con
stitution.’ Sir, that man is no more nor
less than a traitor, and whenever it be
comes his interest, no matter where he may
be, North or South, East or West, he will
betray the country. Such men occupy a
double relation. Tn the first plaoo they
are cowards, for they will not enlist in
defense of their principles ; and secondly,
they are traitors to the Constitution of their
country, for they deolare it no longer
binding upon them.
Now, it’s plain that if we wait for Buoh
fellows as these and for the negroes to pnt
down the rebellion, we will all die before
it is done. When this rebellion is put
down, it will' be put down by men who are
devoted to the Constitution and Union.
One thing is oertain—if these Bepubli
cans maintain the power in Congress, our
government, with constitutional liberty, is
gone forever. If you return to the next
Congress conservative men, who are
anxious only to preserve the Constitution,
we are safe, and the old ship of state will
land in a safe harbor, where we oan find
protection.
The stake we are playing for now is
infinitely greater than ever played for
before. If the Bepnblioan party is retained
in power in Congress, we are gone. If we
send a different class of men, they oan bat
lose all, and they may save all.
This muoh I will say for Illinois—we
intend to maintain our ground in that
State. We shall advance our line some
what ; and I think that when we shall come
to present'these great issues to our people,
duty to the dead, duty to ourselves, and
duty to those who are to oome after ns,
will rally aronnd ns men enough to drive
most of these men from Congress in the
State of Illinois.
One thing I know will be done— this
issue will be presented. It will be pre
sented in no cowardly, truokling spirit,—
It will be presented by men who are not
afraid to speak their trne sentiments, with
the panoply of Amerioan citizens around
them.
My fellow-oitizens, I oan hardly express
to you my feelings when I have seen these
terrible disasters ooming upon my country,
and when ! reflect that her free institutions
are all the heritage I have to bestow upon
my children. I have seen more of the
good results that have flowed from our in
stitutions—more of prosperity and happi
ness among my fellow-citizens—that many
men of my day. And now, in the decline
of life, with a sun tending towards the
twilight, no longer with a vigorous arm to
defend or assail, I. shall endeavor cheer
fully to accept Whatever the Almighty may
place upon me. But, if it is the pro videnoe
of God that he is to punish - ua With afflic
tions, to destroy our government, then I
oare not how soon the summons may come
to go henoe. I would not desire to live
longer. Henoe it, is that 1 say that in the
discharge of my duty before the people,
there is no power on earth that shall pre
vent me from telling plainly and candidly
What I think ought to be done for the
welfare of our beloved country.
But not only does-every consideration
of patriotism urge us to the vigorous pro
secution of this war, if restricted to its
legitimate objeots, but every consideration
of interest also.
As for me, 1 feel that all that I hold
dear is at stake—all is in the safety of my
country, and I would be willing even now
to. close my eyes forever if I! knew that I
was bequeathing to my children, unim
paired, the oiv3 liberties whioh I have
enjoyed under the Constitution. I desire
to live long enough to see peaoe restored
all over the land; from the great lakes to
the Gulf of Mexico. I desire to see all
my countrymen worshipping once more at
the same altar,, and all united in an effort
to transmit to posterity unimpaired the
glorious privileges won for. us by the
blood of our patriotic ancestors. [Loud
cheers.] •
As two gentlemen were discussing
the. merits of a popular preacher, one of
them remarked, ‘He always prays for the
widows and .orphans, but never says any
thing about widowers.’ The other, an
inveterate old baohelor, replied, ‘ Perhaps
it would be more appropriate to return
thanks for them.’
Juvenile thieves need no. school educa
tion 5 they want- no Aom-book to. teaoh
them to nook. , i j
m,* «?t&
; ,; T The‘RefuJe^Tailor.
Mf. dhester, a. tailor, having aeoumu
lated a pompefenby; at his trade, determin
ed ti throw awayinsshears and bodkin
and spend thd-remeimder of his'life
a farm. - He purchased-several hundred
acres of iand in- Tonawanda; andthere
was a < fishing< ground ’-on the estate; Mr.
Ohfcater waa delighted with' his; new. ocou
pation, and he.devoted his efforts with an
tiring zeal to farming and fishing.:; Being
very deaf he often made ludiorous' blun
ders, whioh exoited the mirthfulnesa of his
friends and customers. His graceful and
beautiful daughter was at boarding-sohopl
at the time her father purohased the farm.
She had a'lover, and promised to marry
him, providing he could obtain the consent
of her parent.
The youngman traveled’West as fast as
>ho railway would take him in that direc
tion. - On the morning’after his arrival he
was strolling along the banks of the oreek
that sweeps through the villager of Tona
wanda, when hornet a plain old gentleman,
dressed in homespun, aud inqired of him
‘if the railway carriages had oommenoed
running to the Falls yet ?’
‘ Principally, pike and mallet,’ said he.
‘ You misunderstood me,’ continued the
young man. ‘ I merely wish to know if
the trains have commenced their trips to
the Falls of Niagara, and what the fare
is?’
‘ From three to four oents a pound.’
‘ Do you intend to insult me ?’
‘ I will let you have a large quantity for
two oents.’
‘ 1 have a good mind to give yon a oan
ing for your impertinence.’
‘ Well, if you do not ohoose to give it,
I know who will.’
‘ I shonld like to know if there are any
more suoh fools as yon are in the town of
Tonawanda.’
‘We shall make another haul in the
morning before daylight.’
At this instant another gentleman made
his appearance, and the stranger stated his
grievanoe to him. He said :
‘ I have been asking this old man a few
oivil questions, and he has given me the
most impertinent answers.’
‘ Oh, he is deaf!’ exclaimed the third
party. ‘He is deaf as a post; but he is a
very fine old gentleman—one of the most
influential and respeotable men in the
county, indeed. He is not impertinent.
He deals in fish somewhat, and so do I. It
is possible he may think that I am en
deavoring to undersell him; will yon,
therefore, do me the favor to write down
your question on a scrap of paper, and
save me from suspioion, and satisfy your
self in regard to the old gentleman’s
politeness ?’
The young man oommenoed writing,
when the old farmer-fisherman interrupted
him with the remark :
‘ I will not take a note of hand ; oash
on the nail, or no trade.’
‘He is preparing a note,’ said the last
comer.
‘ Call me a brute, do you ?’ exclaimed
Mr. Chester then, take that!’ and, suit
ing the action to the word, he dealt him a
blow straight from the shoulder, whioh
prostrated him ‘ flat as a flounder.’
By this time the note was finished, and
the old gentleman discovered his mistake
—and about this time the young stranger
made the disoovery that he had been pick
ing a quarrel with his prospective father
in-law.
Mr. Chester made an apology, and in
vited both parties to go over to his house
to dine. The’ front door commanded a
view of a meadow in whioh a oow was
feeding, and while Mr. Chester was look
ing in that direction, the youthful lover,
whose heart was overflowing with emotion,
oommenoed the task he oame snoh a long
distanoe to perform.
‘ I am acquainted with yonr daughter,’
said he, in a loud tone.
1 She is a fine beast,’ remarked the old
gentleman, looking at the eow.
‘ Your daughter ?’ screamed the yonng
man. ‘ I have the honor to be well ac
quainted with her.’
‘She is a noble animal,’ was the re
sponse.
‘ Confound the old oow!’ said the young
man, in a whisper. ‘ I wish Bhe was out
of sight. ■ I was speaking about your ami
able and accomplished daughter!’
‘ She is very kind—indeed, never breaks
down fences—never kicks over the pail—
never strays away like other brutes I
have.’
‘ You don’t understand me, sir! I was
speaking of your daughter at boarding
school !’
‘ No, I never put a board on her faoe ;
she never does any mischief at all. 1
‘Your daughter!’ shouted the young
man, frantio with excitement.
‘ Did you say I ought to V
‘ No, sir! I was speaking of your daugh
ter—the young lady away from home !’
‘ Oh, yes—l have plenty of room ; but
I think she is too old to keep muoh long
er. To tell you the truth, I have made
up my mind to shut her up in the stable,
and feed her on ohop stuff a few weeks.’
‘ Great heavens!’ remarked the young
man, to himself. ‘ What shall Ido ? This
deafhess will be the death of me! I will
try once and if this effort fails, I will
resort to pencil and paper again. I should
like to say a word to you respecting your
daughter!’
‘ I shall let the butoher have her by
and-by—if he will give me my prioe,’
said the old man, with emphasis.
As a last resort the young man Used his
pencil and his letters of
introduction, which wera from mbn whose
opinion was good authority on the delioate
question on the tapis. After, a little cross
questioning, and a little hesitation, the old
gentleman gave his consent ; and when',
the parties were married, he deolared it
was the best haul he had made in all his
life.
Stretch it a .Little. —A little girl
and her brother were on their way to the
grocer’s one wintry morning. , The ground
was white with Lost, and the wind was
very, sharp. were both poorly dress
ed, but the little girl had a sort of ooat over
her, whioh she Beemed to have out-grown.
As they walked briskly along she- drew
her little eompanion olose up to her, say
ing, ‘ Come under my coat, Johnny.’ ‘ It:
isn’t big enough for both,’ he replied. ; ‘ 1
think 1 can stretoh ita little,’ she said:
and they were soon as close together and 1
as warm as two birds in the same nest.
How many shivering and heavy
hearts, and weeping eyes there are in the,.
‘World just beoause people do not stretch
their comforts a little beyond themselves.
testa
'•% is ,#-& -7>?:
; CONSTEBXATION ■ IN.- A CHJ3B.(jH.-rrThe
Beaton, Herald gives publicity to thp*fol
lowing incident, a pity
«within fort; miles of the hub of the uni
verse.’ . The namo' of the town begins
with either ‘S' or X,’ the Herald don’t
say which : '
: ' A railroad man of that quietly jolly style
which takeswith - everybody who likes a
good joko,-'l>ut wouldrft knowingly do a
wrong oriminal thing for the world, is fre
quently oalledto this town and its vioinity
by business.; , On. Sunday, recently, Jie
Tode to an adjoining , town, and called on
an acquaintance who had some , very nioe
bottled cider, which, .the. presumppion is,
he tried. When our railroad friend oame
away, he was intrusted with a' bottle of
this eider, to be delivered to another rail
road man -in Boston. The bottle, was not
very bulky; our friend had capacious
pookets in his coat, and so he slipped the
‘ original. paokage’ into oneof them. On
arriving at the town of the doubtful name,
but which positively does begin with either
S or X, he saw the door of the snug little
church wide open; and being a regular
church goer, he went in. He had a seat
in a prominent pew, with three young
ladies in front, a deaoon near by, and the
elite of the congregation near him. The
services were commenced, and our friend
was soon under that influence whioli is
always produoed by the inspiring musio,
the solmn invocation, and the sympathetic
devoutness of an orthodox congregation in
aoountry village.
The pastor had oommenaed his sermon,
the audienoe was unusually still and atten
tive, and our friend was just wondering
what illustration the pastor would use for
a knotty theologioal point relating to the
punishment of sinners whioh he was jnst
developing, when. ‘ Whaok ! Pop ! Spud !
Whisht ! Fizz-z-z-z!’ out came the cork
from the bottled cider, which our friedd
had forgotten all about, just grazing a
lady’s fall-crowned bonnet, going .half
way up to the oeiling, and coming down
with another pop into the aisle. Forth
from the mouth of the bottle issued a
yellowish-white stream like that from an
inch nozzle at a> fire-engine trial, only
boiling, foaming, seething and spluttering
in an incomparable manner. Our friend’s
clothes were saturated, and the apparel
of the young, ladies in front and of various
members of the elite all around did not
escape. Our readers can judge of the
sensation produoed in the church.
oArtemus Ward being at a celebra
tion and exhibition was called upon for a
speeoh, when he replied in ‘ a toast to the
phair sex Ladies, ses I, turnin to the
beautiful femails whoso presents was
porphumin in the fare grown, I hope
you’re enjoyin yourselves on this oooashun,
and that leminaid and ise wotter ov which
you air drinkin may not go agin you. May
you alters be as fair as the son, as bright
as the moon, and as butiful as army with
Union flags—also plenty of good close to
ware.
Tu yure sex—commonly kawled the
phair sex—we are indetted for our bornin,
as well as many uther blessins in these lo
growns of sorro. Sum poor sperroted fools
blaim yure sex for the difflkulty in the
garden ; but I know men are a desetful
set, and when tho appels had bekum plum
ripe I have no dowt but Adam would have
rigged a cyder press, and like as not went
onto a big bust and been ort anawa. Ture
Ist mnrther was a lady and all her dawteers
is ditto, and non but a lefin kuss will say
a word agin yu. Hopin that no waive of
trubble may ever akross youre peaoeful
brests, 1 konklude these remarks with the
following sentyment:
Woman. —She is a good egg.
Sunshiny Hearts and Paces.—
Every thing, animate and inanimate, turns
to the sunbeams. We instinotivly avoid
oloudy days and oloudy faces. We give a
warmer welcome, at our fireside and our
table, to the undisputatious, than to the
man who is eternally dissecting the skele
tons of things, till his ohamel house con
versation throws a chill on every warm and
healthful feeling. We give the preference
to the man who greets the rising sun with
emotions of pleasure, and not simply as an
astronomical phenomenon, and whose eye,
as it watches its setting, ‘ has no specula
tion in it.’ In fact we prefer a jolly,
healthy human being. The disappointing
chances of life have not left so many of
them that one can afford to let them pass
without a warm heart-grip, and (if occa
sions favor) the interchange of suoh ohanoe
words as kindred souls travelling to the
same eternal home, may sometimes oheer
fully exohange by the way.
About the Knees. —One of our dry
goods firms recently prooured the services
of a clerk who was a green hand at the
business. A young lady entered the store
one day, lately, to make some purchases,
and the other olerks being engaged with
customers, the ‘ young ’un’ proceeded to
wait on the young lady. Among other
things, she inquired for ladies’ hose. The
boy found the desired artioles, and pre
sented them for the lady’s inspection.
‘ How high do they come ? she inquired,
after a short examination.
The boy looked somewhat confused,
hesitated, but at length stammered out:
‘Well, I don’t know, but I suppose
they will oome about to the knees.’
The young lady did not trade with that
olerk any more.
Annie,’ asked an ardent swain of
a pretty girl, ‘ do you love your mother V
‘O, indeed, Ido 1’ was the reply. ‘ Well,
then, will you give me a kiss for her sake V
‘ No, John, I can’t do that; but you may
give me a kiss for your mother’s sake !’
John did it, the rogue!
rpHE LANCASTER DrTELLIOBIOEB
X JOB PRINTING ESTABLISHMENT,
NO.BNORIH, DUKE STREET, LANCASTER, FA
Tho Jobbing Department is thoroughly fdmlibed with
new and elegant typo of every deacription, and is under
the charge of a practical and experienced Job Printer.-"
The Proprietors are prepared to
PRINT CHECKS,
NOTES, LEOAL BLANKS,
CARDS AND .CIRCULARS,
BILL HEADS AND HANDBILLS,
‘PROGRAMMES AND POSTERS,
PAPER BOOKS AND PAMPHLETS, . ...
' BALL TICKETS; AND INVITATIONS.
PRINTING IN OOLOBS AND PLAIN PRINTDIG,
with heatneML accuracy and dispatch, on.the most reaeona!
-bleternuLandin a manner not axoeiled by any establish
ment in the city.
JBSr Order# from -a; distance, by mail or otherwise.
. promptly- attended tS. - : Address . ...
' GEO, SANDERSON A SON,
; Intelligencer Of&cc,'
No.B NorihDnko street,Lancaster,Pa.
-tiarheb’bp siom n 6 tb n,
A ; No. 929 MARKETS,TREE!, ; ’
... _ BetweenOtbandlOth, ,
July 15
ffei'it if
- :r.;
Rsrmb-y-A
BENHBT, for fire yean a student and
assistant ot Dr. -WAYLAN, formerly of this
city, has ramewad hU wwww VtZUff
occupied by East Sing strait, two dooi
from Oentre SquAre,wber»fee.ia prepared to inset those
who may mTOr'mxnwi& thslr dbnfldeaoe, and asrre thorn
In the most skfflfal .inaimer, warranting —in
erery reasonable —so, both ha to opatattons performed and
charges for the same. - / \WhLN.AMEB.
aprl \ ,~i -'> -- ly ia
DE..J . T . BXK BE ,
. ' ' HOttffiOPATHIO PHTBIQZAN,
-0». h,i's.Q A tVr
may.be consulted pxo&MTonfffy, at hlft^Offiofe etJHsnry
Beu’i Hotel* In thedtarohghoriStildfeaifeou ranreflayof
each week* from 10 o'clock In the mornlngto £fea£ttn tbs
afternoon. 'M* v ~ j
An opportunity is' arts' tflbrded to reddest* oCfitraaburg ;
and vicinity to »”<i
and females suffering front the
advice of one who has madiMhis^SUals'pfvUsnsss s
•pecUUty- ~
HO KSRAHD OATTLB PO VD M »
TATOKRfI AimHOBaB POWPKE, 1 r
HEATEPOWDEB, - -
"• /• ;
TBNNireMBB
-BULPHUB,
j SEmuati •
: OBBAMTAitAB,
f OOPPBEAS, *O.
For sale it THOMAS EEIMAEXE’S
Drag A GhemlcelStore, West King street, Lenc*!
. ftb® - .. r;:v:- •=.
Dressls r-mt
:l miSLCJMSXLBr STOSS,
NO. 206 NORSH sfß SfBUB'ABOVI Rats, j. r- -i
: ; PTTTT.ATVKr.PHTR " -jFi
On hand and for sale, a choloe assortment of superior
patterns, andwill plait toorder •
BRAOELBTS, c j
BARRINGS, f
FINGER RINGS,
BREASTPINS,
I CRossaL-v
NECKLACES, -
i GUARD AND, 1
! VEST CHAINS.
47* Orders enclosing thehalr to Ini plaited may be sent
by mail. Give a drawing as nearjas yon an cmpaper, and
enclose snob amount as yon may cboosfttcr pay. r V'
Costs as follows ; Ear Rings'll to s&—Br*eet Pins 43 to
$7 —Finger Rings 76 bents to sR6o—vest Chains $6 to $T—
Necklacess2toslo. \ ••••--* s -
Hair put Into Hedalions, Box Breast Pins, Rings* Ac.
OLD GOLD AND SILVER BOUGHT AT FAIR-RATES,
apr 16 J lyl*
A BOOK FOB. THE TIHBSt
GET IT!! READ I Till ,
JULIETTE MOOSE;
OB
PASSION AND REALITY.
i lUB OJ IHI BOUIH.
BYWTLLIR WARE,.
Well known as a contributor to the following first-class
EnblicatloDß: Peterson’s National Magazine,Godey’a
ady’s Book, New York* Weekly, New York Saturday
Courier, New York Dispatch, New York Sunday Times,
Flag Of Our Unloo, True Flag, American Union, literary
Companion, Life Illustrated, Ac., Ac. '
Hels also well known as the -original of Doestloks, Sweet
William; In the Diversions of that celebrated writer. Anil
the author of Driftwood, The Little Brown House, Estelle
Graham, (a prize story,) The Oholee, etc. ,
The usual discount to trade. >
Please send your orders Immediately to
! WILLIE WARE,’Monroe, Hloh.
PRICE OF BOOK—IS Cents. ' [febll tf 6
Banking house of rbed, Hen
derson k CO.—On the 26th of MAROH. Instant,
the undersigned, under the firm of SEED, HENDERSON
k CO., will commence the Bankng in its nsnal
branches at the office hithertor occupied- Iff John K. Reed
k Co., at the corner of East King and Bake streets, be
tween the Coart House andßprecher’s Hotel, Lancaster, Pa:
They will pay interest on deposits at the following rates,
per cent, lor 6 months and longer.
6 “ SO days and longer. -
They will buy and sell Stocks and Beal Estate on oom*
mission, negotiate Loans for others, purchase and sell Bills
of Exchange, Promissory Notes, Drafts, Ac., Ae n Ac.
The undersigned will be individually liable to the extent
of their means, for all deposits and other obllgatlona'of
Bked, Hzndxbson A Co. JOHN K. BEED,
mar 20 tflo!
SOMETHING) FOB THE TIMES 11 I
A NECESSITY IN EVERY HOUSEHOLDIIJ
JOHNS (6 CBOSLJSrs
AMERICAN CEMENT GLUE,
THE BTEOKQMT QLTJB IH THX WORLD
FOR CEMENTING WOOD, LEATHER, GLASS, IVORY,
CHINA, MARBLE, PORCELAIN, ALABASTER,
BONE, CORAL, Ac., Ac.
The only article of 'the kind ever produced which will
withstand Water.
BXTEAOTB
“ Every housekeeper should have a supply of Johns A
Orosley’s American Cement Glue.”— Ne to York' Timet. ''
“It Is bo convenient tohave la the house.”--iVew York
Yeaprtsz. \ '
“ It is always ready; this commends It to everybody.”—
N. T. Independent. \
“ We have tried lt,jand find It as useful in our house as
water.”— TP tikes’ Spirit of the Timet.
PRICE TWENTY-FIVE OENTS PER BOTTLE.
Very Liberal Reductions to Wholesale Dealers#.
TERMS CASH.
<os?* For sale by alliDruggiats and Storekeeper! generally
throughout the country.
. JOHNB A 0808 L BY ,
(Sole Manufacturers,)
78 WILLIAM ST., (Corner of Liberty St.,) NEW YORK
July 9 j . lj 2d
Biotima roofing.
MANUTAOTUBKD BY TUB .
UNITED STATES: BIOTINA ROOFING COMPANY.
No. 9 Goaa Block, ooknsb Qrxxn ahd Pins Stt.
BOSTON, MASS.
This Portable Roofing Is the only article ever offered to
tho pnbllc, which Is rqady prepared to go on the roof without
any finishing operation. It la light, handsome, and easily
applied, and. can be safely and cheaply transported to any
part of the world* It will not taint or discolor water ran*
ning over, or lying on It, and is in allreapecta a very - de
sirable article. Its! nonconducting properties adapt l it
especially to covering! manufactories of various, kinds, and it
is confidently offeredlto the public after a test of ftrar' years
in all varieties of olimate and temperature, - for covering
all kinds of roofs, flat jor pitched, together with ears, steam
boats, Ac. j
It is both cheap and durable. Agents wanted, to whom
liberal inducements are offered. Bend for sample, circular,
Ac., with particulars,! to “ U. 8. ROOFING CO., No. 9 Goes
Block, Boston.” j . r apr29 8m 16
JjILDER-BE 88l WINK. ;
for sale at AMOS SOUBBEER’S Store, inßafe Harbor,
a large quantity of fojar years* old
ELDER- T WINE ,
a prime article, and will be sold by the barrel or In smaller
quantifier, at reasonable prices.
Jaly 29 4t* 29] I
1000 DOliLjinS PREMIUM.
WENTZ BROTHERS
Hire et 11 on exhibition that
LA.BOE fiOOP BKIBT,
For vhich a Premium of
ONETHODBDANDDOLLARS
will be given to any lady tall enough to wear it; : Ladlaa
are invited to call and bee it, and contend for the premium;
at least, secure one of the
THREE THOUSAND HOOP SKIRTS,
which Wentz Brotbersi are offering at Old Brloes, notwith
standing the advance by the manulic tares in consequence
of the new tax bill. Aq extra large purchase direct from
the Manufacturer prior to the advance, enables ns to offer
Ladles’, Misses’ and Children’s Hoop Skirts
AT OLD PRICES.
Large Purchases of DOMESTIC GOOD 3, before the ad*
▼auce lu enablei us to offer our customers
a R E A T B A R G A 1 NS.
WENTZ BROTHERS,
aug 12 tf 81] Be j Hire Store, No. 5 East Xing 8L
jpIKH WATCH] SS S RICH JKWELBT t
SILVER WAR Et SILVER WARBU
PIE, CAKE AND BUTTER KNIVES.
SUGAR, CREAM AND OYSTER SPOONS.
SOIDP AND OYSTER LADLES,
f SPOONS, PORKS, *O, Ac.
Labr SmxsjAHD Bwr WOMauaiHir. '
SILVER-PLATED WARE I SILVER-PLATED WARE!!
BASKETS, CASTORS, PITCHERS, MUGS, :
SPOONS, I PORKS, A*, Afl, .
JuBi raok ibi Faotobiis.
WATCHESI WATOHESII WATOHESm
CHEAPI CHEAP!I CHEAP!! ;
OLOO-SSI CLOCKS!! CLOCKS!!!
OUT, OOLUMH ASP PLAXBfBOHTfI. •
JEWELRY! JEWELRY!! JEWELRY!!
L A TOT STTiia ABB BUT QUALITT. '
; HARRY Z RHOADS,
22)4 Wißf Eiso Stsiii,
Between Cooper's Hotel and J. Q. Gate's Rry Goods Store;
dec 17 | , .. ~tf 4S
Howard assooi atioii, "
PHILADELPHIA.
For the Belief :of US Bldk'and DirftotteiL afiUdttA with
Virulent and ChronicDJseases, and espeefeuj fat the Cure
of Diseases of the Sexnil Orgacd. > -•
B ffi l Sgh A c^ :B ffii
Weakness and other Diseases ofthe flazhat <Wsaina*und
n the’"”""
reqoldto for Boot md ~fthn<m<«v4np- )
it tlie lowest prteeßy tofwfafe& he toTitetf t&«9finU&B of
ioJSK^fc}*
iXL
rectedi *ud~a<lipfed to
ifiwmManligr in aßi
m»jH«i*r T v£<
i,41, Ooraw Sl^M^l'OitatiM.
•*' i
.^gSSSC
AMOS 8. HENDBBSON
ISAAC E. HIKSTKR.
AMOS SOURBEBR.