t- Advertising Rates. TTe deiiro it to bo distinctly understood ftst no advertisements will bo- Inserts 111 tbe ictumna of Thk Oabdox Adtooatr that hi; bo received from unknown arties or Brmt ualess accompanied by the oabh. Xh followlnj are our ohlt terms I ONH SQUAttll (10 L1KR3), Oaeyear.eaeh insertion loots. $tx months, each Insertion lScta. riiree months, each Insertion 20cts. Less than three months, first Insertion $l;eack subsequent insertion J5 ct- Local notices 10 cents per lino. II. V. MoRtmutR, jr., Publisher. ATTORNEYS AND COUNCELLORS. M. ItAl'SHEK, ATTORNEY & COONOELLOR AT IjMV. 1BT DOOrt AnOTK Tna MAKSIOK nOUSK, NAVCll CllVNK, TENN'A. Heal Estate and Collection Aucncy. Will Buy lad Moll-Heal Estate Conveyancing; neatly done: Collections promptly mode, flottllng Estates or Iiecodents a Specialty. May be consulted In English and Ucrman, November , 1SS4. T. A. BNYIiEK, ATTORNEY AT LAW. Omen-Corner of Hank Street k. lUnkway 2nd bulldlnR abovo tho Cnrbon Advocato Printing Olllco. liaylb.lSSIMnS LEIIiaHTON, rilYSICIANS AND DENTISTS- jQll. AY. YV. KEllER f -pirYSKHAN AND SUKflEON, DANK STREET, LEHIGHTON. PA. OFFICE Hours nt Parryvlllo From a. In to IV m. dally. Hay be consulted In the Enullfh or Qerman Language. Way IT, 8. A. DEIMIAUEIt, M 1., rlIY3ICIAN AKDSCRQEON Special Attention paid to Chronic Diseases, Onrloa South East Corner Iron and becotid .Streets, LEHIGHTON, FENN'A. .April 3d, 1875. 15. nnuF.it, M,i). V S. EXAMINING S Vita EOS, I'ltAOTlOINQ PHYSICIANS SU1ICJ EON ' times' Dank Street, Hunan's Block. LEHIOHTON, FENN'A. JJav bo consulted In tho German Language. Nov.S.th. u. sini'u:, r utive PHYSICIAN AND SURQEON, SOUTH STREET, . LEI1IOHTON, PA. Jlav bo cnnrullod In English or German Spuclal attention fclven to UvMtcotouv Orricu Holms From 12 M. to a P. f.I., "anp from e to U P. St. March 31, 83 T. A. Habenold, D.D.S. 0Mt BRANCH 01'FIUE.OpposltoClauBsStIlro's Bank St., Lehighton, Pa. Dentistry In all Its branches. Teeth ex tracted wltheut pain, (las adtnlnUtcrod v wlun requested. Illlico Hays W hUNhh DAY of e.ih week. P. (I. Address, LITZENUERQ, Loli1(!h' county, Pa. Jan. s, I8.s-ly. W. A. Oortright, D.D.S., OFFICE : Opposilo tho "Broadway Houso," Mauch Chunk, Pa. 'Patients havo the henent of tno latest Ira. mmvt,tnnt In ino'haiilial nni'ltanccs and itim i.A.t itiAHwi li nrtra.itmciiL In all surirlc.il eai.i. AN'.STIIETIH ndmlnlstcrcd If toiiratl. If pos.lUi-, porinns residing outside of Alaueh Chunk, should m ike eiigmfiiicnts by mall. - lJ i A BOOK ON Deafness&LCatarrh. Tha ahovn named book of near no paires by UK. SHOKJlAKEli, tlio well-kiinnn ex perienced Aural Suriceun, will bo sprit trco to snr address. Every family should have this Honk. The book is uiiuiraicu, auu iui. Iy eiplalns In plain language all Diseases of the EAR ami CATARRH, and bow to treat theto ailments ecccctsrully Address, Dr. C. E. Shoemaker, 013 Walnut Street, HEADING, Pa. Dec. e,188Uy HOTELS AND J.F.l 15 Y pARSON HOUSE, JONATHAN K1STLER, PROPRIETOR, IUmcSt., LehioiiTo, Pa? The Oa.inoN Hons k oirera first-class accom modations to the Trarelinv public. Hoarding by the Hay or Week on Reasonable Terms. Dholes Clirars, Wlucs and Liquors nlwayson kanl. Uoed Sheds ami Stables, with atten- tiro Hostlers, attached. Apru lo-yi, UCKEKTON HOTKIi. Hwiy between Mauch Chunk F; Lehlithton LEOPOLD MEYER, PHOrBUTOtt, Paekerton, Penn'a This will known hotel Is admirably refitted, ami hta the ben accommodation! lor Derman tat and transient boarders. Excellent tallies and tbe very belt liquors. Also ttno stables attached. tk'lt.l6-yl. Beer Saloon and Restaurant 1113 Vine St., Philadelphia. Donnis Gilbort, Proprietor. Tho Par Is funrlihed with choice Cigars, Fresh LaKr', and other refreshments. Per sons Irom tlio Lehlnh Valley vliltln Phila delphia are respecllully Invited to Klro mo a all, lltNMa tltLUtUT. March 'Jo, lssi-tf. BY THE SEA I " The StOekton. -rarytni and Atlantie avenut-s, one of the finaJt sa. side resorts In tho country, Is now open for tbe reCrpliMii of gurats. The fjpilities lor bonllue, lulliin, fulling, .Vi'.. are linrx relied Tonus IHwral KELSUY A LEP LEU, Pmprtetois. Mention this paper. J. W. UAUDENHUSlI Keipeetlully announces to Ui nuhllo that he ... ......I TMPYV I.IVVOv'iirilll.l' In naaretlon with bis hotel, and Is prepared to rtral.h Teams for Ftiiierals MMn or Business Trips on skerOst notice and most llheralterms. All ordsrs left at the "Carbon llnuts" will ntettre erempl attention Stable 00 North S'rstl, sit the hottl, Lehighton. lautS-il H. V. Mouthimkb, Jr Publisher, VOL. XITL, No 30. Thomas' Drug Store. GREAT Just received a large stock of the very latest paterns of Wall Papers AND Borders, which I offer at the fol lowing reduced prices: Gilts, 25 fc 30c. White Blanks,10&.2c. Brown B's 7, 8 & 10c. All must be sold in a few months. Call at DRUG STORE for bargains. Durlinprs' Old Ptand, Bank Street, LEHIGHTON. T. J. BRETNEY, Ttrcppctfnlly announces to tho mcroliantsnf Lelilirhton and others that ho Is prepared to do all kinds of Hauling of Freight, Express Matter and Baggage at verv rensonahlo prices. Ily prompt at tention to all orders ho hopes to merit a share nl public, patronage. Residence, corucr of Pino and Iron Streot, Lohlghton, Pa. Orders lor hauling left at O. N. sweeny & Hon's Store will rocdvo prompt attention. T. J.- I1UETNEY. Oct. 1'A 1SSI -Sin. rnifoaiAS uuair.nr.u, X CONVKYANCRIt, AND GENERAL INSUKANCE AGENT The fullonlng Companies are RepreseBted: llKlA )N MuriTAiwi'inn. ItCADIMl MUTUAL l'lltri, VYOMIo pip.n. roTTSViLi.n Fir.n, LEJl IGIi Vims, ami tho TRAVELERS ACOIULNT INSURANCE Also Pennsylvania and Mutual Horso Thief elective and Iuxuranvo Cnmiiacv. March 25. 1573 YllOf. KEMEREft. TTTIT ,nf"rworkln!r people. Send 10 cents 14 H I .Wnnfitiiftu. ond wo will mull vuit Ircp. lJIjJJLa r,al, valnnblc snmplo tox of ffonita tbnt will nut vnu In th way of uink Inir more money In a ftwilnythan you ever thflUKht po-sibl? at any budncss. Capital not requ'red. You can llvo at homo and work in spare limn only, or all tho lime All nl both sexes, ofall nsrs. urandly successful 60 cents lo CO easily earned every evening; 'I bnt nil vhn want work tnav test tho bust ncss, weinakothlsunparilleleilotlcr: Tnall who aronot well satrsflod wn will send ifl to pay for the trouble of wrlllnu us. Pull particulars, dirrnlons. etc , sent Tree, lm mene pav absolutely sure for all who start at once. Don't delay. Address Stinson & Cc, Portland, Maino. dec. IM ly E. F. LUCKEXUAC1I, 1)1! ALE It IN Wall Papers, Borders & Decorations, Boois, Stationery, Fancy Goods. Window Shades & Fixtures, Latest Styles, made and put up, If desired. Paints, Oil, Varnish, Putty, Brushes & general Painters' Supplies. Ho. 61 Broadway. Mancb CW, Pa., Kelnw the Broadway House, nnnln presents Riven away. Send lllltis live cents poslaee, and by lUUU,nn y0, w cetfreeapaeknKO of goods of larue value, that will startjou In work that will ntonre Irlng jouln money taster than onylhlnit else In America All about tho $200,000 In prcsonts with each box. Asente wsnted everywhere, of either sex. of all aitos, roV all tho tlmo. cr sparo time only, to w.rk for us at their own homes. Fortunes for alt workers absolutely assured. llont delay, H. Ha'.utt & Co., Portland, Mo. DeolO-ly (jggpSuhscribc ibr the Ad vooate, only $1 per year. New Liquor Store The nnderslicned respectfully announces to the public that he has opened a Wino and " .iquo- Store, In the Ilulhllntr next to Hit "t:arlKm Hnuie," Bank St., Lohighton, and Is prepared to supply Choice Ilrands of WINES and LIQUORS, RYE WHISKIES, BRANDIES, HUM, OIN, ALCOHOL, MINT, HITTKhS, KIMMEL, ke.. &e , atVery Lowest Prices. H01TLE8 AND DEMIJOHNS CHEAP. William G-. Heilig, 'P(tejpj Lthl.hton, P. TRADE vie? MARK. 4hsn1tttrJit Free from Otatoaf JJmct'ics ami I'ohottf). PROMPT.SAFE.SURE Curefrr Couch. Cold nml other Tit rout una ia st tiff AflWtlrtMtL THK t'lHIlLtS A.IOyfel.EH (.. Itnltlmoff. 3U I S.A, Vtrr rVnr-r llrn-i l ' J t Ik. inrnsi ra 1th Hp s.t i ftl. B S Uarl.tbr, llfitdnrlip, Tpttthark ppr.tn. iirtntr. nun Omar l'aln. ...I Arhw. tllF. CIHULI3A. VOCr.Ltll 10.. LaUImorc, at.,C.S4 MY MIHDE TO ME A KINGDOM IS. nr William riYno. My nilnd.o to mo a kingdom K such perfect Joy therein I Undo As furrc exceeds all earthly bllsse That God or Nature hath assltftulo: Though much I want, that most would have, Yet still my mliule forbids lo crave. Content I live; this Is my stay I seek no mqro than may surilce, preise to-bcare no luutghtles iayi Look, what I lack my inlndo supplies Lot-, thus I trliiinuh like : kins, Content with that my mimic dotli bring. see how plenllo surfcts oft, And hastlc clyinbers soonest fall; sec that such as sit aloft Mishap doth threaten most of all, These gel with tolle, and keepc with fearo; Such cares my mlmlo could never bearc. No princely poiupeuor v.calthle store, No force to win tho victorie, No nyllc wit to salic a sore, No shapo to win a lover's eye- To nono of these I jleld as thrall: For why, my inlndo despiseth all. Some have too much, jet still they crave; I little have, yet seek no more, They are but poorc, limush much theylmc. And I am rich ullh little stoic, They poor, I rich; they beg, I give; They lueke, 1 lend; they pine, 1 live. I laugh not at another's losse, I grudge not at another a game; No worldly wave my mliitle can tosse; 1 brooko that Is another's bane, I fearo no foe, nor fawno on Irlcnd; I lothu not life, nor dread lultic end. I Joy not In no earthly bllise: I weigli not Crocstis'.wealtli a straw; For caro, I care not what it Is; I feahi not fortune's fatal lawi ily miiulo Is such its may not move For beautle bright, or force of lovo. I wish but what I have at will; I Wander not to seek for more: I like the plulne, I clinic no hill; In greater slorms I sit on shore, Ar.il laugh itt them that tnilo In valno To get w hat must be lost agalne. I kiss not w here I w Ish to kill ; 1 fclgne not lovo where most I haste; I Dreake no sleepa In win my will; I waylo not at the mlghtle's gale, I scorno no poore, I feare no rich ; I feelo no want, nor have too much. The court ne cart I llko no loalh, Extrciimcs are counted worst of all; The golden meane betwixt them both Dost surest sit, and fesres no fall, This is my chojee; for why, I Undo No wealth is like a quiet mlnde. My wealth Is heallli and perfect case; My conscience clcre my chlefn defence; I never seeke by bribes to please, Nor by desert to gho olTencc. Thus dollhc, thus will Idle; Would all did so as well as I! ANOTHER LOYE MATCH. "So this Is your sole business with me to-day, young sir?" said the wealthy banker, In a not very promising tone. Surely that young barrister had been wildly presumptuous when he, with his moderate Income, his trifling practice, had come to ask the hanker for the hand of his only daughter. The. young man's face flushed hotly, but ho kept his self-command, replying with admirable coolnoss, "This Is my solo business with you to-day, Mr. Forrester. 1 have come to yon, hoping for tho consideration which man should show to man, independent of position, social difference, the world's opinion, or anything outaldc this one fact. I, with all the forco of my man hood, lovo your daughter, and ask your permission togo to her and tell her of it You have not answered mo yet, blr." "Oh, It won't take mo long to do that," tho linker's tono was rather Ironical. "1 hays hut ono daughter, and I have very different plans for her future. You understand me:" "I cannot fail to do so." Tho young man's face was white now, and had n little sternness in It. "May I ask whether you speak In this manner solely becunso you know I am not wealthy? Would you sponk differently were I well, not a struggling banister?" "Oh, I have no personal objection to you," Kilit -Mr. lorrealer, carelessly, playing with a inpcr knlfo on the taUlo beside him; n cootly toy of Ivory and gold, one of tho curiosities brought by him from Kgypt some year before. "You do me no jtwtice, 1 am confi dent," Dick Ah on pursued, a sort of dignity in his lino, blonde face, "You understand fully that Miss Forrester's position, your own reputed wealth, have had nothing to do with this interview. I have hesitated to sneak because of them; but I fancied that even I, poor and obscure as I am, hd the light to make a trial for tho happinesw I craved. I have come to you solely as a man, Mr. Forrester, holing to And In you sympathy of a man for a man, CMtlng aside for the moment all other consider- atlons." I "That Is quite sufflelent, sir." The banker spoke Indifferentl; , still playing OTCOBSQH ' ' 1 1 1 btRMAN REMEDY INDEPENDENT LEHIGHTON, CARBON COUNTY, with thd pretty toy. 4,lt It of no coiise- quenco lint you fancied. You will un dcrstntul that henceforth Mi:s Forrester Is a stranger to you." "If It Is her tleslrc, air." "Sho ivlll have nothing to do vth It; she Mill 'not oven know of your your presumption. I am fully capable of judging for my daughter." Ho was not quite so Indifferent now, and tho young lawyer atoso from his seat. "And I for myself, 'Mr. Forrester, having reached the ago of discernment; I will have no Interview with Miss For rester, with your permission, should you. indly clvo It." "And should I withhold my permis sion?" Tho banker was becoming angry, mid is eyes were very cold as he surveyed his visitor. Tho young man bowed. You will not do so, lest 1 find myself constrained to resort to means of having. one without," he said quietly. "I am still under tho impression that a man 8houl,d allow no other to speak for- the woman ho loves; that ho would try to win, let what may stand in thu way; and I take my final dismissal from her alone." The banker pitched aside the toy, and islng, motioned tho young man back to his scat while ho rang the bell. "This Is quite refreshing," ho said Ironically; "being entirely tinlooked for and unusual; hut you shall be gratified." A servant answered the summons. "Tell Miss Forrester I wish to see her at once if she Is disengaged." The servant vanished, and tho two men stood facing each other In perfect llcncc, Five minutes, ten, fifteen, went by; then there was a rustle of silken drapery, tho door opened, and a beautiful girl entered the room. Beautiful? Well, not pcihaps with the simple beauty of chiselled features; but a girl, beautiful with the beauty of a true, womanhood; with dark, unshadowed eyes, red, ilex ible lips, a smooth white forehead, and rich, dusky hair coiled low on the grace ful head; a girl with ready smile yet with enough of her father's iron will showing in chin and cye3 to mako one fully understand that sho would hold her own in a struggle. She had known the young lawyer for six months, had met him hero and there for he was received in the best society sho had danced with him nnd found him a good dancer; she hail talked with him and found him, perhaps, a trifle more than agreeable, beinc, unlike most of the men that conversed with her, cam est and frank, rather than Inane and complimentary. It had dawned on her, lately that he harJ-soirgtitillFitinoi-e than others, and with tho dawning of the knowledge had conic a new pleasure to her. Unlike most young ladles of the present day, I .cola Forrester did not value a man by his ancestry or his bank account. "You wished to seo me, papa," she said In a pleasant voice, through th music of which one heard a ring of self' confidence. Then sho saw Dick, and smiling, held out her hand to him. "Mr. Alvon," sho said, "1 am pleased to see you, Her father frowned heartily as he Mopped forward in time to prevent the young man touching the offered hand. "Leola," he said, half sternly, "I sent for you that you might assist mo to con vlnco this this gentleman that you still obey me." She looked from one to tho other with open, wondering eyes; tho young man was deadly jule and his lips were firmly set; Indeed, ho looked very unllko a lov er, but very handsome. "You will kindly cling to facts, Mr, Forrester," he said quietly, and the banker flushed angrily. "What do you Intend to imply? Have you more Insolenco to offer?" ho asked "1 offer no insolence," Dick answered recovering himself sufficiently to dr.r forward a chair for Leola, for which she thanked him. "I simply asked your "My permission to mako my daughter an offer of your hand and'fortune, was It not?" tho old man broke In wither ing! y, "and I decline tho offer in her name. Doubtless you would liko very well to woo and win an heiress, Mr. Alvon, but, as I told you, I have other views for my daughter." "Papa" Leola had not taken tho chair Dick offered her, but stood near it, ono hand resting on tho back "for shame, papal Is ltnoccssary to insult a gentleman who pays your daughter to great a compliment? Since you have spoken so rudely to Mr. Alvon, perhaps It would bo as well of him to sreak to me on the subject. I will answer him as a woman can answer such things, papa, I " "You will tell him that his prosump tlon Is Insufferable," her father sold,' still angrily. "You tell him that'you and I can manage to exist without counting a bogsarly lawyer amongst our acquaintances." "I do not think I will quite t ay that, papa," tho girl said, her cheeks flushed, her oyes glowing. "I will say solely what my heart prompts. I ain listen ing, Mf. Alvon," turning to him, a slight termor In her voice. Dick had been very patient, consider Ing that he was not usually slow to ang cr. He was rather pale still, as ho lifted his head and addressed Leola. "I am what I havo just been called, Miss Forrester a beggarly lawyer; but I am a man for all that. It may seem as strange to you as It does to your father tliut one lit my circumstances should think of lovo or a chance, of happiness, being unable to purchase It; and yet I wrong you! you will listen the patiently while I tell you that I have grown to love you with a man's beet love, and ask If there be not a chanceof my winning you. Xot now, while I can offer you but my empty band and honest iov, but some time when Inae won Live and Let Live." PA., SATURDAY, JUNE a way and drawn success to me by the efforts I can and will make with such a hope before me. If there Is a voice In your heart that would speak for mo do not silence It. I am saying this to the woman I love, not to Miss Forrcstcr,tho belle and heiress. Will you answer mo hero iu your father's presence? I would take no answer from him; I would take an answer only from your own lips. ! What shall It be?" Ills words, which had made the veins on the banker's forehead swell with In dignation, moved Leola strangely; she flushed and paled, and the hand on the chair began to tremble. "And I havo told you she wants none of your love." Mr. Forrester broke out impatiently. But his daughter turned him with a sudden gesture which silenced him. "How much you are mistaken, papa," she said clearly, "for I do want It all of It. I quite understand you," turning to Dick, "and I honor tho frankness of our manhood. I take your love, oh, so lllingly, so gladly I I have long re spected you above all others; I lovo ou now. I will go with you; I will clp you in every struggle; I will not watch you from afar; I will " "You arc mad!" her father cried. But she held out her hands to Dick, and he was covering them with kisses and whispering loving, disconnected words of affection. "Leola, do you know what you are doing?" her father cried again In agrcat But she smiled In her lover's faco and answored pleasantly "I know perfectly, papa. I am prom ising to bo Dick's wife, and telling my self how happy I am going to be." "You will be a beggar, then," Mr. Forrester said, through his shut teeth, 'I'll give my money to some charity; I'll found an asylum I'll sink It in the Hudson river. You shall never touch a dollar of it." "Papa dear, money Is verv nice, but It Is not everything, especially to a wo man," Leola said quietly. "I don't think I'll mind very much, papa." "I'll close my doors against you! I'll never look on your face again!" fumed the stern parent. Sho ptiled then, "I'apa, you'll not do "that! You loved mamma: why should I not lovo some body too? You may do what you will with'yourmoney, but lovo me still,papa, I could not live without that." Hero Dick came to the front again smiling rather heartlessly, I confess, at tho scene ho had caused I think this ran bo arranged a little ItdliVcrcntly, after all," he said cheerfully, 'I tint not the presumptuous beggar you think me, Mr. Forrester; I am tho fortunate inheritor of a very snug for tune left mo lately by an aunt. It con sists of a duo old place on tho Hudson; a cottage nt Newport, a farm in the northern part of tho State, and a few thousands in the bank. I have fancied myself not utterly' Indifferent to Leola and wanted to assure myself that she loved me was willing to give herself to a poor man, simply because she loved him. I am willing to forget all you said, sir, and will promise to do my best to mako you a model son-in-law. Will you give mo your daughter now, Mr. Forrester?" "It's about the only thing I can do now, seeing that sho was willing to give herself to you anyway," the banker said, grasping tho hand Dick offered him. And so when the heiress became a bride there was another lovo marriage to be recorded. ITEMS OF INTEREST. The steamboat Plymouth Itock,built in ISM at a cost of $000,000, has been sold for SSo.OOO, and will be converted into a floating skating rink. The Earl of Huntingdon, who, with his son, Lord Hastings, passed a good part of last winter in Xew York, and who was Chairman of a Florida land purchase company, died last week at his scat, Sharavoguc, in King's county, Ire land, and Is succeeded by his son, who is just lo. Huntingdon Is third In.thu roll of Earls, dating back to lfi20, but tho last few holders of the title have been very poor. Two of the bidders for the fiovern- mcnt envelope contract, on their way from Holyoke to Washington, were taking over the situation with much assumed candor. It was readily agreed that, as the bids had been registered, there could bo no risk In comparing notes; so each promised to mark his bid on paper and pass it over. Both scratched a way.tbo paper were exchang ed, and both wero blank. Each weasel counted on the somnolent condition of the other. , j It will be remembered that a Paris 'physician was recently fined -for telling professional secrets, because, in defend ing tho character of a dead patient, he explained the true cause of his death The samo physician was more recently called upon by the Paris authorities to give tho usual certificate of the cause of death in one of his patients. This he declined to do, on the ground tlwt he would thus "betray a professional secret," As it stands tho quarrel is an interesting one. Prof. Paine's assertion about the Inconsiderable part played by women as musical composers has resulted collation of the' titles of a small list well-known songs, the airs of which larin's and hnskin' bees and sich to tbe I "lone, She. used two bottles of Electric wero written by women, and a few ! mean, of the grace And now. OLord lfi, cantata, adopereua,,b,,taco ,9 ent, who aids In bringing to light the ! R0 rdlug through tho street of the vil-' claimed for them. Hundreds of teatl not very numerous examplei, adds, in a ' Tage to-day whistling this ungodly tune i monlals atwat their great curative communication to the Boston rrenlnj I " , t , I nu (My Hftjr cenu a totUe by iv.,.fni. .iti, i. .ki i At this point, to the utter surprise . mamas. rraiwr'nt: "There is nothing which i an(1 demorunzation of the scandalized 1 can bo brought forward In contravention hretheren and sisters, and to the Intense I An Oakland obituary notice referred of Prof. Paine's assertion, and I think I delight of the Irreverent youth who were to a deeeaeed citltenas having "gone to 1 i am safe in sa) Ing that no woman Is entitled to rank even as a fourth-rate eomr-oser.' 1.00 a 13. 1885. If A ''H0SS" TRADE UrSKT BY A "PREVI OUS" WOMAN. A Fairfield man who is somewhat addicted to trafficking has u poor opinion of women as aids In these matters. It happened thus! Upon a recent beautiful Sabbath, when tho sun shone bright and warm upon the glitter ing snow, worn by frequent hoof-bents into a fine road, the tinkling of the merry sleigh bells rang out enticingly upon the winter air, tho gentleman Invited his much better-half to join tho merry throng. Harnessing his horso they strated for Watcrvillo, and pass'ng through tho village they found them selves npon tho plains blow. Xow It so happened that this gentleman swapped horso once with a Frenchman living there and, notwithstanding the sacred Jiess of the day, tho ruling passion seized upon htm and he essayed to trade. He expatiated upon the virtues of tho horso and said that lie had owned him three months. At this point his better half broke In with "you have owned him more than eight!" He gave her a nudge with his elbow and proceed. "I would not sell him," he said, "but I expect to go on an extended tour In a few weeks." "Oh, Ben," said the wife, In horrid accents, "youain'tgolng away, either." That settled it. Slowly and sadly the horse was pulled Into tho road nnd pointed for home, while crimi nations and recriminations were tho order of tho day. The journey home was not so joyous as the start, and It is settled fact that when that gentleman contemplates a horso trade he will leave his wife at home. A SQUAEE BOY. Two or three weeks ago a pedot tr'au who was passing a houso on 1 lopclle street heard tho sounds of a terrific struggle going on, and as he looked In at the front door .a boy about twelve years of age, who sat In the hall, quietly observed : "It's only tho old folks having a little row, stranger. ' Do they have 'cm often?" asked the man. "Almost every day." "If I wero In your place I'd stand at the door hero and charge ten cents admission fee. It's worth the. money to see a famllv riot liko this, and you might as well make a few dollars as to let the chances slip." Tho boy said he would think of itr and tho pedestrian waited until the man had choked tho woman as black as plum and then passed on. Yesterday ho chanced that wny again, and there was another row going on, and the same boy sat on tho door-step. "I'll eco the show," said tho man, as he pulled out his wallet. "Has my advice profited you?" "Stranger, I can't take your money . replied tho lad. "Why?" "Because I am a squaro boy.. For a week or so every fight In there was as qnare as a dice and wortli the price of of admission, but as toon as a crowa began to come and the gate money began to run up to eighty or ninety cents.dad and mam began to hippodrome on the public. That blood on his nose was put there half an hour ago, and mam's black eye is three weeks old. They want me to stand in with them and deceive the public, but I can't do it. Let the best man win or quit the busi ness, is my motto. Pass on, stranger, for this is a put up job to gull the con fiding public." WOKE UP THE WRONG FARROT. Funeral fact and funeral fancy are subjects prolific of good stories, but we have rarely met with a better one than the following, which is vouched for as a story of fact. At a Boston funeral not long ago, the clergyman was dilating upon the many virtues of the. departed. As It happened there was much justifi cation for It, as tho deceased was a man of large heart and many merits; yet tho clergyman, probably, feeling free to let his fervor of language play unrestrained, almost outdid hia theme, Xot content with couching his praise in simple and straightforward words he mounted to Imagery and seemed to attribute angelic as well as human characteristics. When at tho climax of his eloquence, his hear crs charmed witli tho sweet Incense, the spell was broken by a shrill voice, which cried out: "Facts, facts, give us facts?" The sensible comment came from a sage and venerable parrot which had been removed to an ante-room and then it was remembered that prominent among the virtues of the deceased mas ter was a sturdy dislike for flattery and a habit of sharply rebuking "higlif ulin ILLUSTRATING A PRAYER. A good deacon in an old-fashioned Xew England town was terribly exer cised over the conduct of a son of his, who showed a disinclination to walk In the straight and narrow path prescribed by the strictest rules of orthodoxy. This recalcitrant, youth displayed a fondness for boclal gatherings, and would rather "go home" with a pretty girl Six nights In the week then devote a single evening to a careful study of his Sunday school lesson, Finally tho climax of his trans gressions was reached, and at the prayer meeting that week tbe unhappy father took occasion to mako his family troubles the subject of a fervent pttitlon to the throne of grace. "Thou knowest, O Lord," he said "how that son of mine has transgressed Thy ways and brought torrow to the heart of Thy servant, who has tried to . . ZTnl" 'should of,n Thou know-oat how he m-efers annlo - present, the conscientious deacon whistled, with realistic exactitude, the wellknownstralnsof "Yankee Doodle," :il then pi :cttded -!th hlsrri; er. Year if Paid in Advanco. not paid in advance, $1.2;"). Straight whiskies mako crooked roads. Down in front the young man's moustache. Those who employ a plumber must pay tho piper. -A cent vat you find vus more worth as two vat you lose. While is a mangy mongrel like a pig? Because he's a poor cur. TniiKE Krpr.CTs. Thu thousands of remarkable cures which have been ac complished by Hood's Sarsaparllla are tiue simply to three cuccts wmcli tuts great medicine has upon those who take. It: First'. It purifies the blood. HecdHd: It strengthens the system. Third: It elves healthy action to tho digestive organs. Itli these three effects no ulscaso can long retain its hold. It Is forced to leave the system, giving place to health and strength, through the potent In fluence of Hood's Sarsanarllla. Sold bv all druggists. Try It. -What you don't know about men oftentimes makes them respectable. A dude's trousers beat a breach of contract all to pieces. They are breeches of contract. "Permanent." There are medicines which clve only temporary relief and then leave tho suf ferer worse off than before, especially in cases of dyspepsia. Kemembcr that It is not mac way witn lirown's iron Hit ters. Seo what Mr. J. M. Clalncs, of Gaines, S. C, says about this prince of tonics, "My wife lias becngrcatly bene fited by it; sho had been troubled .with dyspepsia for years, and now I believe she Is permanently cured." It also cures liver and kidnoy complaints. It h no indication that a cat knows the valuo of money, simply because It alwaj'3 carrie3 Its pum with it. A geniu3 Ins Invented steel knives which will cut cold Iron. Xow board-Ing-houso bcofsteak must yield. The sure effects of AVer's Sarsana rllla are thorough and permanent. If there is a lurking taint of scrofula about you. Ayer's SarsapariUa will dis lodge it, and expel it from your system, "Reading maketh a full man," says Bacon.. Curious that the libraries aro not patronized more. The lad was blowing bubbles when ho accidentally swallowed some of the soapsuds, and that made bub ill, Shlloh's Vltallzer Is what you need tor constipation, loss ot Appetite, Ulz zlness' and all symptoms of Dyspepsln, Price 10 and 75 cents per bottle. Sold by W. F. Biery, Weissport, Dr. C. T, Horn Lehighton. Croup, Whooping Cough and Bron chltls immediately relieved by Shlloh's Cure Sold by W. F. Blery Weissport, ir. i. iiorn i.enignion. That hacking Cough and can bo so quickly euro by Shlloh'n Cure. Wo gaurantce It. Sold by B. F. Biery Weiss port, i it. i . i. uorn, Lciugnton. Will you suffer witli dyspepsia and liver complaint? Miiloirs V itallzcr I guaranteed to cure you. Sold by W. F Biery, Weissport, Dr. C. T. Horn, Lc iugnton. Sleepless nights, made miserable by mat. lernoio eougn. .union's uure l tho remedy for you. Sold by W. V Blery, eissport, C. T. Horn, Lehigh' ton. Catarrh cured, health and sweet breath secured, by Shlloh's Catarrh Remedy. Price 50 cents. Xasal injec tors free. Sold by W. F. Blery, eiss port, u. i. iiorn, Lonigmon. For lame back, side or chest, uso hmioivs porous Piaster. I'rice .'. cents, Sold by W. F.' Biery Weissport, Dr, t-. i . uorn Lenignton. Shlloh's Cough and Consumption Cure Is sold hy"us on a guarantee. It cures Consumption. Sold bv W. F, Blery eissport, C. T. Horn Lehighton. When a young woman marries a man for his money, would It bo proper to say that tho man has married his "hired girl?" Tho young couple .who before mar riage thought they would live on love are now living on corn bread and hom- Racklon's Arnica Salve. Tho best salve in the world for cuts, bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rhucm. fever sores, tetter, chapped hands, chilblands, corns, and all skin eruptions, nnd posi tively cures piles, or no pay required. It Is guaranteed to give perfect satsfac tlon, or money refunded. Price 25 cents per box. It used to bodcathtoconnterfcltthc coin of the roalm, yet for ages past the moon has beenputtlngotU new quarters every month. Queer reading would be the history of names. We cannot, however, go Into the subject now, except as far as to say that Dr. Kennedy's "Faoritc Jlenictly" ivas called by that name, in an Informal fashion, long before tho doctor dreamed of advertising it for public use. Speak incofithe would say to his patients: "This Is my favorite remedy for all troubles of the blood, A-e.," and Its suc cess was so great that ho dually spelled the word with capital letters. "What will be tho drink of tho fu ture?" asks Mr. Moody. There will doubtless be many drinks, among which whisky will loom up prominently. Xcver neglect a constipated condition of the bowels, or serious rosults will surely follow, such as pilos, impure blood, and many chronic complaints. Burdock's Blood Bitters. "Pa, how funny this looks In this paper! The printer has got tho words all mixed up, so there is no sense in it." "Xo, po, my child- That is a new poem by Tennyson." Very Remarkable Ree-avory. Mr. Geo. V. Wlllins. of Manchester. Mlnh wrltAfcr fv vlfi. ln hMn i helpless iforvewhcW-j 1 ' tliat she eoula not turn over In bed a happier home." The widow U about bringing a libel suit. These Oakland vrcsjtc art rco ;a:ut f sr th'!: I The Carbon Advocate An Independent Famllv tfewtpapar Published every SATURDAY, In Lohighton, Carbon Co., Pa., by UAItllV V. IHOHTIIIiriEn. urrirK-nANKWAY. a abort dlstauce tpojr the Lohlah Valley It. n, Depot. Terms: $1.00 perAimiua in Adrance Kvruv uiacHiirTiox or mix amp rarer Job Printing: AT 'VICHY LOW PRIDES i wjui liij i r, . sl?35;r)llt -THE BEST TUNIC. This medicine, comhlnln tivm with mm Vogctntilo tonics, quickly nnd completely i urea nynprpsln, ImlliU-stlmi, Wtnkneas. iiniuroiiiooi,.iinlnrin,CultUnaa Vetera, mid Neiiriilnln. It Is an unftllllnfr rnmr.il,- fhr TlfciM,j. Klilneya mul l.fvrr. ' It la Invaluable lbr DtcencMi rxwtiltsr tn Women, anil nil "who lend sedentary ltVes, ltdoei not Injurs the tceth.couse headacb,or produce Constipation ofArr Iron mtilMnet to. ltcnrlchcsaml purifies tho blood, stimulate thonppellte.nldj tho assimilation of food, re lieves Heartburn and llelchluir, and strength, ens the lnmolcs and nerves. ror iniernnitent revers, Lassnuac, Lacker Energy, Ac., It fins no equal. ST-1 no crnume has ahoro trado mart- and rowed red lines on wrapper. Take no other, :.jtoi,b, nnonxiurjiiciL co., uuti aoui, snV. HiMRTEIMER, Sr, ioTARY PUBLI OFFlCEi ADVOCATE IIUII.UINCI, Bankway, Lehighton, Penna. All business pertainlns lo the office will receive prompt attontion. IS. A Now and Original Plan Instruction in CLASSICAL, MUSIO on thu Piano and Organ, rounded on the Celebrated HOI1I1INS A .u t.uil.A iubl li mi. 1 priup mnuerair, Also aijent for tho HEHNINU PIANO ami tho ESTEY OliOAN. Old Instruments taken In exchange for new onos. ueaier in aiusio. jhusiciw instruments anu Musical Merchandise, T. F. KlKINTOP, Lolilghlon, l'n. April 11. 1SS5 Om 10-Tcn-10-lcii-10-Toii-10 DI0 LEWIS'S NUGGETS, A Remarkable Magazlno,-- Crowdcd with Brief Articles, on Sanitary Subjects by that most sensible, terse & humor ous writer, DR. DIO LEWIS. Wortli Its WeiElit In Gold ! YOU CAN GET A SAMPLE COPY FOR 10 CENTS By sending to tbe NEW Bio Lewis Publishing: Company, CO 71 BIBLE HOUSE, Nr.w Yonk City. 10-Ten-lO-Toii.lO-Tcti-lO ATVnTrT' PemHeents fur postage andre. I II I iNi celvo free. a costly bo ol voods X MlLUJiKhici, help you to mosr money right away than anythtnc else In siioj world. All, or either sex, succeed from flr.t hour. The broad way lo fortune opens be. for the workers, absolutely sure. At etioe addres. Taut k Co., Augusta, Me. Dec. 20-ly TITVf M?rT7C! AHSOLUTE DIVOR. Ul V UIVUIjO 0ES foil PERSONS residing throughout the United States and Canada for de.erllon, non-support, Intemper ance, cruelty. Incompatibility, etc. Adrlso ren, titate yeur eise and address ATT iHNKY WARD, Woild Hulldlnir, 1057 Uroadway, New York. July liMy Hair Vigor restores, with the eloss ami freshness ef youth, faded or jrny hair to a natural, rich brown color, or deep black, as may be desired, ny Its use light or red hair maybe darkened, thin hair thlekriie.1. and baldness often, though not alu-nys, cured. It checks fallliiE of tha hair, and stimu lates a weak and sickly growth to vigor, H prevents and cures scurf and dandrah, and heals nearly overv dlseaso peculiar to the scalp. As n Lnillca Hair Dresslnc-, tb Vioon Is unequalll ; It contains neither oil nor dye,' renders Iho hair aoft, glossy, and silken In appearance, nnd Imparts a delicate, agreeable, and lasting perfume. Mr. c:. P. Rxirnru writes from hlrhj. O,. Jh'iio, I"-.' tall my hair commenced falling nut. and in n short time 1 IweAUiu nearly bald. I uwl part of a lrtl ff Avr.n'a lUlB Viunu. which slopped the full Ing of the hair, ami started a new growth. I bav now n full head of hair growing vigor, nmly, and am convinced that but for tun use of your preparation I should have been entirety bald." .1. IV. llowr.x, proprietor of tbe MrJrltitr (Oltvt) Eutiumr. raja : "AVtn'a ItAin Virion Is a most excellent preparation for the hair. 1 speak of It from my own eiperlenoe. lis use promotes tha growth of nrw hair, and make It glonyand soft. Thp Vinon Is aw a sura cure for dandrulf. Not within su v knowledge has the preparation erer fallcl to give entire satisfaction." Jilt. Axotrs Piinn.Mnx, leader of thu celebrated " Fal.b.i'.ni P unity" ef Scnlt..li Voeallsta, writes from Itntian, Wilts., ftli. ISSO " Ever sliioe my hair began to gi w nl very evidence of tho change which lie. t, 14 tinia prncurath, l have used Avr.u a Ham Yiomt, and so have leu able to itiaiuta n aiiappoarnneo of jouthfulness a matter ol considerable consequence to inlnlsurr, n'n. lrs, actor, and In fart every oun wl-v - u the eyes ot the public," Mm. O. A. PitcsroTT, writing from 1 Elm St., ClutrUn'.iWH, JAlH., April U, tft, f.iv 1 " Two yeara ago about m 0-1 hints of im hale CAino otr. It lli'imed irv rapidly, and I was fail urowuig buhl. On using AVrn'a Hun Yioou the ralllue stopped aud a new f, -wu, OAnutieHced. and Iu about n mouth tin hir-ft u4 euiuiiletely oorered with short bajr U ha onutflitwl to grow, and Is now aa gm-d m before it fell, t regularly u! but mie l-'tl nf the YliMUt, but ikiu- use It Kea.Ioiull) as a dreaeliig." We have hundreds of similar testluionia ta tbe elRaacy ot AVEr. it Haiii Yiivu. 11 needs but a trial to convlueo tho most skepti cal of Iu value. r&gr,vncn nv Dr.J.C.AyorcCo.,Lowei).Masc Sttkl by all Druggtstt. Lm 11 11 I5J I - i z - a is! i-j