Ufa &m1m Sflwrnfc. , .Vl LBIIlailTOM.PArf 1t BAXUIIDAY tJKCEMBKIlIJ t88S. Editorial Montlon, A IJAPP? NEW VEAn TO VOUf Itn.ru P. Tjovt. ax.QoTernor of Intra. "Qtltetikt WsluRton, D. 0., on Saturday sight list aged 78 years. PniiADiLrau'n new Post Office, whicli ia 80od to be occupied, oost abont $3, 000,000.- Its dimeuuioua are, 175 feel 9 luolica on Chestnut street, 176 fret 1 tncti W Market street, and 481 feet on Ninth filieetj fieiffht of the douio nboVo the cntb, 170 feet. 'Ok last Saturday the New York Jlln " Injt and, jtitlorjal Petroleum ExchanRe Tottd la faror of consolidating vrith the .New Totlr Petroleum Exchauge. The latter Exchange also decided by ballot in favor of the consolidation, but the ma jority voto was very email, and some of the, members were of the opinion that it Vflk not largo enough to warrant the con BollilRllon. Oommittees were appointed by both EtcbaDgcs to draw up plans for the merging of both into ouo body. Cmcido News Congressman Bobin feon, of New York, indicated a few days ht;o that it is his intention to follow up during the present cession the nsiuluo career ho began Inst winter as a howler against Eoghnd and her government, It strike us that .the interests of this country would be conserved if Itobiusoi nnd hii associates paid lesa itttcnti n to tho British lion and more afleulion to l9 Awpftfan at1a.- t worrfd. behest to iopl after our owu oeofo (Jlpp'nfi aronud in foreign zoological gardens. Afted. St. Louis had experimented un salisf iJtorily with wood, asphalt.granite, and other material for pavements, a hun dred public-spirited men contributed $50 each toward a fund to test fire brick for paving purposes. The test was made in the busiest streets. A committee of engineers aud otheis have just reported "fire brick show nil the endurance ol granite, and that they make a smoother, cleaner, and less noisy street, and are more, easily repaired and givo n better foothold to horses; that neither frost nor Are affects them, aud that they can be used at less than half the cost of gran ite." Trie concluding sentence of Mr. Dar win's posthumous paper on "Instinct," read before the Linnre.iu Society in Eng land the. other day, is: "It may not be logical, bat to my imagination it is far more satisfactory, to look at the yoaDg cuckoo ejeoting its foster brothers, ants making slaves, the larvaj of tho Ichneu XQonidaj feeding within the Hvo bodies of their pray, cats playing with mice, otters and cormorants with living fish, not as Instincts specially givn by the Creator, bait as very small parts of onegeneril law' leading to the advancement of nil organic bodies mr.ltiply, vary, let the strongest livo and the weakest die." OoNanrasMAV Hopkins, of Pittsburg, thinks that the alien landholder ought to go, and proposes a law restricting to 1000 acres the quantity of Und which may bo acquired by a foreigner who has no .intention of becoming n United States citizen. Those of our people who with out protest or murmur saw empires given away in ntd of railroads and railroad Bohemes will bo surprised when mado aware to what extent the public lands have, been taken up by alien Uudlords. One English Earl owns a tract of 100, 000 'acres, while another has 00,000 acres of Dakota wheat lands. A syndicate of speculatively inclined Englishmen now possess 3,000,000 acres in Texas alone. A"Westxb.n Senator is about to pr cent a petition for the ratification of n treatv with' the Sionx Indians under which tho 0.000 square miles known as the "great Sioux reservation" may be opened to settlement. The Cbicaoo Times sajs that by the treaty oflBGS theso lands r reserved to the Sioux forever, and that it was stipulated that no modifica tion of the treaty bbonld be made except upon a vote of three-fourths of all the adult males of the Sioux; but when the diicovery of gold In the Black Hills made the expulsion or the Sioux desir nble the Government's agents made n dicker with the chiefs and tho head men of the Sioux for the cession of the landa. The Senate refused to ratify this traus aclioo.anJ it is this real estate operation that the Senate is again to be asked to consider. This is only one of the com plications of the South Dakota problem. On Deo. 0 the Eui of Devon's Irish tenants met to consider his offer as to tlryarchaie of their holdings. A letter from Mr. Parnetl was rend, in which La said that sixteen years' purchase, pro vided the yearly installments did not ii cied the present rents, woulJ be a fair offer on the part of the tenants. Tie agent suggested making this offer to titid Devon, and said that he had heard from several landlords in the counties of Limerick and Kerry, who were watching the negotiations and would allow their tenants to purchase on similar terms to tboia which might be agreed apon. It was resolved to appoint a local commit' te to ascertain the views of the tenants and th o&rs they would be prepared to make for their holdings. Adocument is said to havo been signed by mora than blf the tenants expressing then willing- M to purchase. This buUness excites great latexes! In Ireland. At the last census the natives of Ire land who were present in Eogland and Yalta, aumbered 62,374, being in the prottertkua of 21.65 to 1,000 of the entire popoktfloo. The number is not an in. treating quantity, for in 18G1 it was 601,. Bit, aadat each sensus since it has fat )en gradually. These figures show that relatively to the whole population of the oonutry the Irish element is not formid able, but its unequal division over the country concentrates its strength in cer tain districts. In the agricultural coun ties the number of Irish is insignificant, bat in the manufacturing and mining conntles and boroughs they form a Urge proportion of the population. Thus, iu Liverpool liey are reckoned at 12 8 per cent., In Birkenhead 8.8, in St. Helen's 8 6. in Manchester 7.5. in Salford 7.1 io Lancashire C 4, in Coubtrland 6.6, per tnL, and so on. FROM WASHINGTON S.Hoial to the CAitnuM Auvccatk. Washington, Deo 21, 1883. The compleio 1 is 1 of Committees was hid bctoro the House nbout neon to-day. Below is given tho mombcrshlp of the more important nnd the chairmen n por tion of the minor Committees: rpajri end Meant Mnrnnn,tI!.,Chalrman Mills. Toxin, liliiunt. Oa Illackbnni, Ky., Hewitt, N.Y., Herbert, Ala., Jlurtl.O., .tones, Ark., Kelley. 1h., Knmon. In., JIcKlnley, O., lll'coek. N.V.. ltin.ll. Mass. AppieprfatlonitRnnintt. l'a.. Chairman! Forney, Ala., Kill. ln., Uulman. Ind., Han pock. lexai. TowiiMicnrt, 111., liutrhlns, N. V., Kollett. 0 Hums, Mo., Keller. O., din lion, III., Ryan. Kan., Calkins, Ind., Jlorr, Mich., Washburn, Minn. Judiciary. Tucker, Vn., chairman; Ifcyii ruonil, Unltiertsoii, Moultnn, llrndlicad.Diirs hcimcr,Collliis..Seney, Jtayhcrrj', Ileccl, Tay lor, Moray, Poland, Ill-own, lllsbeo. llnnktngandCurrtnc.--ISuclilicr.Mljsourl, chairman; Krmrntrom, Tntler, limit, Miller, Cauldcr, Wllklns, Ynhlp, Dlngley, Ilmmcnn, Adams, Henderson, Hooper. Coinage, Weight! end Mtaiurei. Illand.Mo., chairman: Dimd. Hardy, Nichols, l'usey, I.nnham, fuller, Bedford, focey, Cliacc and livcrlianl. rarfjlc RaUroadi Casslrtay, Ncv., chalr man; I'hrockninrtnn, Oabell, Thompson, Jr., Jordan. Crist, l'ost, Willson, Wlllard, Hun ham, HnnhacK. rottojflctt and Fottroait. Honey, JIlss., chairmen; Iteese. (In., Wnrrt,lnd.,Cosnnivp, Jto., HlpfRs, 111., ltoijcrs. Ark., Taylor, Tcnn., Jones, Tex., l'nlge.O.. Itlnslinni, 1'su. l'eelte, Ind.. hklnner. N. Y.. Whltn. Kv.. WukpllHlil. Minn.. McCormlck. Ohio. tortign JJairt. Curtln, l'a., chairman; nelniniitiK. Ueusler,Vls.,cicments,(;a., W. It. Cox. N. C, O. D. Wise, Vn.. Stewart, Tex., l.iinl). Ind., lilec, Miss., Walt, Conn., Kctchnm, N. Y., Phelps, N. J., Httt, 111. I ommerce. Itcacnn, Tpx.,clinlrnian; Clar UV. Mo.. Tnnier. Kv.. Dunn. Ark.. Spvmonr. Conn., (llasscnck, C'nl., Woodward, Wis., jujie, iu., uurKCRUHic, Aims., uen, in., Davis, 111., Wndsworlli, N. Y'., Ijoiw, Mass., Stewart, Vr.. l'otcrs, Knn, Rwert 4- Ilarliort.y,'mh, Kv., chairman; lllnncliard, Ia Joiips, Ala., Olhsoii, YV. Vn., Itiinkln. Wis.. Dreekenrldic. Kv.. Mumliv. I.. v.. .......... 7..I ir....dn..:.... Itl-i. it...-' uiiltmill. vm,, l lull I II.lll , lUll'fl., ilCII- nerson, in., jinjnc, l'a., lloulnson,0.,Clnice It. I.. Stone. Mass.. llnrlelch. N. V. i'lectiont. Turner, (la., clialnman; Davis, Mo., Converse, O., Cook, lu., Itennett. N. U Ixwcry, Xri'l-. Kltlntt. l'a.. llobcrtson, Ky J. .I.Adams, H.Y., liannpy, Mass., IVttcbonp, '1-..... Illtl. .... ,.1nt,tlMn X'nlt ir....1.t.n. A VII II., Kill trr, J .1.) f ' UliaV.lW.i.VllLFUIII la.. Hart.Ohla, . , MllUary rfjj'air. RosencrO.'is, Cal.. chair man; Hloouni, Hlblnrll, Morgan, Walton!, .Nichols", Murrny. Dancan, Hteele, ICync, fjilrd, l.yiiiaif, CiitcIiconMaglnnls. Jfatil Affalrt.-Cux, New Vprk.clmlrinaii; Morso, TTt)ott, IJnchnimn, Erttoif, nnlleirtlne( MCAiIut!, Hnfmeri Tlinrmvi, (;oif,jr,,l)oiitell. JmTTM"t'nt e !. ilrtr.-King, La., chairman. , , ... , , llallwayt and Canart. Davidson, Florida, chairman. Indien AJTairi. Welburn, Tex., chairman. Public Landi. Cobb, Ind., chairman. Mijtfta. Muller. N. Y., chairman. Ttrritortet. Uvlns. S. C, clialnnan. lnval. Pcntlont. Matson, Ind., chairman. Pcntiont. Hewitt, Ala., chairman. Labor. Hopkins, l'n., chairman. Public Land Clatmi. Muldrow.MlsslsslppI, chairman. Din. of Col. Harbour, Vn., chairman. GVuims. McMillan, Tcnu., chairman. War Clatmi. ticdiics. Ohio, chairman. Patent!. VaiiPP, N. C chairman. Education. Aiken, H. C, chairman. Manufacturci. llaclcy, N. Y.. chairman. Mtnei 4- M Inlng. llarner,Tcnn.,chairman. Agriculture. Hutch, Mo., chairman. Select committee chairmen aro as follows: Mutchler, Keform ami Civil Service; Slocnm, American Shipbuilding; Hill, Alcoholic 1,1 quorTranic; tnhm, on tho Ijiw ltespectlng Election of President and Vice 1'rcsldent; Warner, on Payment ol Pensions, llountics and Hack l'ay. CONOEKSS AND ITS EMPL'jl'EES. To show your readers what a larco body of assistants our Congressmen nnd Senators require, I have collected nt great pains irom the official records the following facts, with which fio publio generally are not acquainted: The total number of employees aud sub-ordinate officers of tbo House ,is 277, divided as follows; Under Speaker, 3C; Clerk, 39; Doorkeeper, 1S3; Sergeant-a't-Arms, 8; Postmaster, 1G; Annual Clerks and Messeugers to Committees, 51; lie porters, 7. Tbo Speaker's salary Is 20,000 with n private secretary nt 51,800, and two clerks, one at SI, COO nnd the other nt $1,400. The Chaplaia of tho House re ceives S900. the Clerk, of the Housa $1, 500; Doorkeeper, $3,000; Sergeant-at-Arms $1,C00; Postmaster 82,500. The subordinates to (bo nbovo officer? nre compensated, 7 official reporters at $3, 000 each; C clerks nt $3,000 each; 4 nt $2,500; 3 nt $2,210; 20 at $2,000, 4 nt SI,. 800; 7 at S1.600; 2 nt $1 ,500; 7 nt $1,410; 47at$l,200;44at$t,000;lGit $900; 11 at S310; 43 at $720; 11 at $G00; 2 at S500; 29 at $100. These salaries aggregate noarly $350 000, to which add the salar ies of the 326 Congressmen at $3,000 each and we make the discovery that simply the rEr.souEL of the House costs the country nearly $2,000,000 per annum, or an average of about $20;000 per eaoh day In session. TUB SENATE SIDE of Congress have a larger proportion of aids than the House, there beiug a tots of 202 subordinates to 78 SennlorR. There are in Vice-President's office 2, Chaplain 1, Secretary's efdee 31, Sergeant-at-Arms 98, Engineer's department 10, Post Office 7, Clerks to committees 48, Official He porters C, their salaries beitig.the Presi. dent of the Benate S8.000, his secretary $2,500 and messeDger $1,440. Tho Chap lain receives $900, the Secretary of tlx Senate $5,000, Sergeaut-nt-arms S1.500, Postmaster $2,230, nnd Engineer $2,1GU lielow these there are 2 clerks at $3 000 each, 7 at $2,C00, 30 at $2,250, 2 ut $2,. 000, C at 1.800, 42 at $1,410, lOat $1,200, 11 at $1,000, 21 at $900, 1 at $810, 32 at $720, G nt SG00, 20 pages at $100, and 5 official repoiters at $5,000 each, the roll aggregating $203,000. The 78 Senators receive annually $1C8,000, making the rEBsoKAL of that branch of Cougrets cos the people three-quarters of a million dollars annually. SOME PAKCIE?, The above figures include only the sal. aries, and do not represent the aggregate expense of Congress, which averages in total about $15,000 foraeh dayssrssion. ine rEESoNKL oi me senato averages $10,000 to each Senator, while that of the House reaches only JG.000 to each Mem- ber. If the House indulged iu the same ratio of expenditure that does the Senate, it would cost $3,250,000 n year for the PEitaoNEXi of tho former iody, against $2,000,000, its present expense. The average number of days that Con gress Is in session daring a year is about one hundred, of four hours es.ch day, a total of four hundred hours per annum, at an expense of $10,000 per hour, or $100, CO per minute. The comparative coa to England for its Parliament is about $30,000 per hoar, or $AOO per min ute. APJOPUNED. Congress has adjourned for two weeks and the city Is now rlinott deserted by our natiounl legislators. The newspaper scribe most content himself In this in terval by writing up the echoes of the three past weeks of Congressional re organization, aud there nre a large num. ber of interesting episodes that will grace or disgrace the columns of the press. JUDGE KELlXY'a CASDOB. When the list of the Ways und Meins Committee was shoan to Judge Kelly of Philadelphia, the oldest membtrof the Housa aud u Itepuhlioau prottoiiouist of the firkt water, be looked it over very cirefnlly, and, stein? that it plilnly re fluctwl Speaker Carlisle's free trade eii- tlm nla, bo said: can only say to job nsSlaymnker said to Ills bull that batted the locomotive, 'I admire ynnr pluck; bit I bavo little respect for jonr discre. Hon.! " Mr. Carlisle smiled nt tbis sally and retorted "There Were locomotives' on nil sides Jndge, and I attacked the weakest one, in my estimation. The two then engaged In n protracted argument on tariff, Mr. Carlisle contend ing that duties were too blgh and snould be reduced, while Judge Kelley said he biped the majority would spring the question, as that would obliterate tho chances of Democratio succession in 1331. Judge Kelly is of the opinion that tbe Democrats will attempt some very foolish tariff legislation, and that the Republican side will strengthen their tariff reoord with unanswerable nrgn ment and undeniable facts. A hurricane iu tbo IIouso may be expeetod during the winter. BELMONT, Sit., OFFERS $100,000. X! if ore Mr. Carlisle had positively de cidid ns to the Chairmanship of the Foreign HeUtions Committee, it is al most authentically known that August Belmont tbe paternal backer of Perry offered to contribute $100,000 to the next Democratic National Campaign Fund if bis son should be selected ns the Chair mtn of that Committee, bat Congress. mn Finnerly and Robinson learnlrg of this effort to purchase tbe honor for tbe young scion of tbe bouse of Belmont, speedily brought Buch a pressure to bear on the Speaker that he recognized the danger of insulting an element which tho Democratio party must retain or go under; Mr. Belmont, Jr., therefore had to go, to tbe delight of Mr. Cox and the Irish element. Toting Belmont is growing more un popular 6Very day among his older Democratio colleagues. As soon ns it wa,; decided to organize n Committee on American Slipping. Mr. Belmont having feu'ded that he cu'ila" not havo tho head of the Foreign Relation; Committee im mediate npplied to Carl!bI", for tho Chairmanship1 of the new comroitioC, and to further influtros ta appointment circulated n petition among the Demo cratio members urging his selection fz tbe honor. When the nmbitious young Congressman presented thin petition to tho Hon. George AV. Converse, of Ohio, the latter said to Brlmont: "Well! His it como to this? My young friend, I have been in tho habit of sign ing petitions like this addressed to the doorkeeper, praying for the appointment of door-slammers, porters, pages, and cleaners of cuspidore?, but never beforb for the chairmanship of a committee. This seems to me to be a now aud re mirltable innovation, nnd I will sign it only under protest, for it despoils the dignity of the House," Not abashed at this curt criticism Mr. Belmont permitted Mr. Converse to attach his nutogrnpb, nnd immediately buttonholed another Congressman. "Cheeky Belmont" is the alias many members now use when speaking of this Frodigy. KEIFES'S rOSITDN AS LEADER of the Republican side is being contested by Hiscock nnd Kelley, nnd the recent snub tbo ex-Speaker has experienced nt tbe hands of tho very men who gave him their complimentary vote at tho opening of Congress, forhisold position, has sent Mr. Keifer to his' home in Springfield, Ohio, ia quite a surly mood. A prominent Republican member safd lb me yesterday: "Mr. IWfcr should know that the harmony nnd snccefs' of our party de mauds his retirement ns n lender, nnd if he will not recognize this fact nnd net upon it, we shall bo compelled to treat, him in n manner in publio debate that wetdiould prefer to nvold . But tho in. terosts of the Rupubiican party nre para mount if not greater than Mr, Keifer's personal vindication; and upon his further attempt to become the dictator of tho minority ho will be submitted to farther humiliation." Mr. Keifer's friends say, however, that ha must nnd will be recognized by tbe Republican members as tho leading spir it of their body. They quote the fact t'nt Mr. Carlisle nnd the Democratio side look upon him ns such, nnd predict that npou the reassemblage of Congrss in January, Mr. Keifer will b tbe cen tral figure of his party in tbe House. OEH. M'COOK'S SCDOBDIKATES. It is n great relief to mnny of the Domocrntic subordinates of tbe Sennte to know that but few changes will be made In their roll, as Gen. Mc'Cook has derided tn leave that matter to tbo Ssna 'tors, who seem to be well enough satis ficd in securing tho chief officers of their body, ami nre inclined to allow n bun. dred or more of tho Demosratio occn pints of minor positions to retain their places. Up to this week there have been nt least twenty-five applicants for each position, but these have now gone to their homes disappointed nnd bore. The Republican Senators thus redeem them solves from tbe charge of violating Civil Service Reform, over which tbe Demo, cratio side indulged in such a howl, EEILF NOTES. Tbe grand Jury of the district have at last indicted W. W. and S. O. Fritzger- ald and one Webb for pension frauds. This is only tbe beginning of Col. Dud ley a warfare against n large number of attorneys violating tbe pension laws. Ben Bntler was here a week aud secur. ed his nomination for the Presidency by the Greenback organ of this city. He expects this little move to had to his endorsement by tbe Greenback nnd labor parties of tbe whole United States, and having secured that be aaya the Dsmo. eratio party must accept his eandidaoy or loso the Presidency in 1881. Tbe National Colored Committee held here last week, called a National Conven tion to be held in Richmond, Va, in Jnly next Fred Douglass, lienj. K. Bruce and Col. Murrill of Maryland, are prominently identified with this move ment. Tbe objects are to secure tho more eqnabh rights of their race. The wife of Lieutenant Greely now lost iu tbe arctic regious, will soon be in Wanhington to urge au expedition for tbe relief of her buband as soon as tbe weitber will permit Sergeant Mason was in the city last week on his way to Zinesville, Ohio, to attend the reunion of the 78th O. V. I, in which be served during tbe war. He nU B-tty had $10,000 well invested and Hint Ihey were happier than ever now. Tbe Sergeant says be learned a good trade wUle in iiruoa-niaklnB boe- and that he wtlTgo liito tbe retail shoe basinets in Washington riSitKprib'gTIa is a great favorite in this city. v . .Regular-to the CaBbor Advocate. ' WVwliiNdtoisfD. 10.; Deo. 22, '83 A large audiehca'intercstcd in the fato of Ireland an srrtdience made-nn larcelv of enthusiastic IrisB-Amerlcan citizens; with a sprinkling" of! mt'mbers of Con gress, was assembled at Ford' Opera House last night to tako action concern ing tho execution of Patrick O'Donnell, in England, last Monday, for the killing of Carey, the Informer.' Tho assembly was of men mostly, but a number of ladles occupied scats in the orchestra chairs. Mr. Robinson of New York de manded the recall of Lord J. Russell Lowell. Mr. Calkins, of Indiana, main talncd that ODounell bad been illegally convicted, and Mr.. Finnerly declared that the President ought to have demand ed the respite of O'Donnell . for ninety days, nnd in default pf it, have suspend ed tbe diplomatic relations. He pre. dieted that if, in consequence of this stern coarse, England had sent ber fleet out here, ,sbo would have got tbe worst of It, ns in tbe war of 1812. Mr. Bolford of Colorado, maintained tho right of every mm to bill a "sneak,"- and de clared that had O'Donnell been tried In Colorado he would have been promptly acquitted. Tbe bitterest rebuke, how- over, called forth by 0'Donnolfn cxecu into, is tho formal resignation by Mr. John Joseph Ryau, of his American citi zenship nnd the return by him. of his naturalization papers to .the judges of the Court of Common Pleas. He scorns to be any longer the citizen of,a republio which allows American citizens to be hanged nbroad when thoy commit mur der, or allows them to b3 Imprisoned when they blow buildings up. under sentences which have not been approved by Irishmen in this couutry. Cougress indulged yesterday In'its an nual comedy, entitled The Christmas Recess. The plot of this amusing farce is well known, but it is always produced with great laughter nnd delight. Tho curtail! rises about a fortnight before the holidays, when Congressmen aro found solemnly assuring reporters that this ye.:r they propose to sit rigbfalong, and keep Christuas by transacting the public business. As .December ndvances, how ever, these geuti.'men relent towards themselves, nnd say v1"1' perhaps they will take the simple hoii.'iy week, on the ground that a qaoruru of numbers could not be found in the city. Bis, further than that they object most posi tively to vacation. The Republican side of tbo House yes terday repudiated very decisively tho as sumed leadership of Mr. John Keifer. To-day tho newspaper correspondents indicated their opinion of Mr. Keifer by leaving the correspondents' gsllery in n body when he started out on a set speech fayoriug the appointment of a special committee on woman's suffrage, and re maining out until he had completed it. They then Hied into the gallery 'and look their places. It was, the first time'Ruch a spectacle was eyer witnessed, repre sentatives of all the Republican as we'll ns Democratic papers joining in it. Whether the country will hail with profound satisfaction tho advent of uaq., other National bankrupt law, depends.; some upon what sort of a law it is.; The. principal bill now before Congress, ,fiinjt, ply revives tbe law which was repealed by act of Jaatfl, 1878, the! only modift otlion being that the compensation ol the assistants in the district courts shall be fixed salaries instead of by fees. This is n good amendment, provided tbe salar ies nra not top. high. It will be remember ed that the fees paid to tho conrt officers under the old law, constructive nnd' otherwise, generally nbsorbed'tho poor debtor's cslnle, leaving nothing to he. divided up between tbe creditors. If we are to have.n bankrupt law, this hill is as likely to go through ns nny other because it has been subjected to the scrutiny of the courts in all its parts, aud has been tbe instrument by which more than one millions of dollars has been saved to the debit side of the business men of the country. The Democrats In Congress are very' playful, nnd there is n good deal more of the atmosphere of relaxation nbout tbeir cloak-rooms than is to be breathed in the retiring-rooms on the Republican -side. When a Republican Senator gets tired of business he goes over to tbe Democratic side to hava some fun, Tbe Democratic Senators play practical jokes on one nu- other, nnd perhaps tbe most persistent joker of that body Is Senator Garland. Not long ngo a Senator who owed Gar land one for previons pranks, got hold of some "April fool" caramels aud plac ed them carelessly on his desk. Garland spied the deceptive chocolates, and care lessly sauntering by, picked up one of them, nnd said: "What are these, Sen- ator?' "They are caramels. Take one." "Thank you. I will.'" and he took one. Now, the caramel was filled with soap, nnd the jokers expected to Bee Garland spit out the nauseous stuff. But Garland disappointed them. He ate up the whole tiling, soap and all, nnd never made a sign. The perpetrator became frighten ed nnd rnn out into the cloak.rpom, ex claiming, -Gojd Lord, I'm afraid tbe man is poisoned." "Ob, you needu't be alarmed." said Butler, of South Car olina, "Garland's got an Arkansas stom ach." To this day no one knows wheth er Garland tasted tbe soap or not. Our New York Letter. Regular correspondence of Advocate. New Vonu, Dec 20. 1683. Thank God I Christmas is 'over, and one can pnt one's hand to other uses than perpetually diving in one's pockets for money. Iudeed, a man's lot is nn unhappy one. I do not even allude to the expenditures for bis own family and friends, but to the thousand aud one outside) e fairs. Everybody' band is open on the day before Christmas. The barbirwho shaves yon iu tbe morning Intimates that be has not smoke-i a good cigar bit ce he has consumed those that you gave him list Chtiatnias, The boy' wbo brtubes your coat and polishes your boots expects fifty cenU iiutead of the usuai ten. xue ucxei senor at vour elevated riilroad ktation smokes, and so ' dies tbe gateman and tbe conductrr of tbe train ith which yon rii'edoan town. Then the man who has charge of the elevator in the building iu which y mr business lr, has a little box dvcr- a ed with evergreens etc.. with a lltllu card of Merr ChrUUwu aud t you . . ! happen to olanco at It, he remarks In at . ruboeerit tone that he left tie openlnt largo enough for the admission of silvet dollars, for cava he, n good many tenant crry ooin. instead .of paper money, anf no one would think of putting In Ies than a dollar. Then your office bol looks expectant. , The letter carrier stem to chat for a moment, The news-dealir wishes you a Merry Christmas. The o'd woman who washes your windows lor k in on you. 'When yon go to lunoh, the waiter at the reaUurantmakessucha fniB aver you as to destroy your appetite a' most Then some of your lady friend who are Interested in some mission or other charity affair look you up, an5 thus by tbe time the day Is over yon (to home out of pocket end ont of temper, and wish yourself fcdmewbere about the North Pole where you will not be pes. lered. The Churches this year spent lesr money for decorations jnan In former years. Thcro were of course the con ventional wreaths nud garlands, etc, but tbo immense floral display which greet ed tbo rye in many fashionable sacred edifices were missing, and one can hard ly regret this return 'to common sense. Two sears ago one church in Fifth Ave nue spent nearly two thousand dollars for floral decorations for Christmas. This year but little over two hundred dollars wns laid out and tbe balance ol tbe money went for charitable purposes. A, new feature tbis year was the fashion introduced by tbo lending hotels and bar-rooms of giving elaborate Christmas dinners to their regular customers at tbeir bars. The mexds in many in stances wcro extremely elaborate, offer ing diuners for which Delmouico would charge from five to seven dollars a cover. One might jndge from tbls what an enormous profit thero must be In the liquor business, and what an enormous nmount of drink is consumed in bar rooms. Tbe opening of the ball season is nt band, and hard times are at band for the man nnd woman to whom social pleas ures nre a duty. Not to mention tb number of private or scml-pnblic affairs let me mention to you the leading balb to which eycryboay, with any preten sions to being anybody, mast go. The;. are the Charity Ball and Mnrtbn "Wash incton reception, tbe ultra fashionable affairs; the Old Guard nud Twenty-second Regiment Balls, essentially military affairs; tbe reception cf the Palestine Commaudery, which affords a rendezvonp for members of Knights Templar and olhr secret orders; the French ball and tui fetes of the Arlou and Liederkrauz Societies, where revelry in masque al ways runs high; tho Sparkling Coterie, where you havo to prove that you are a Citholic, and tbe Purini Ball where you can scarcely feci at case unless you can prove that at one time or another you had a Hebrew relative, even if it were" only an "uncle." There has been and is an intense rivalry betwi en tl e manago meats ot the.Metropolitan Opera House aud the Academy of Musio to get the managers of the different balls to come to their rcspestive bouses. The Acaden y of Music, however is winning, for the fact that the supper rooms and kitchen of the other establishment nre not yet quiet complete has kept many off. Fanny Dayenport, last Saturday night 'eaded her season nt the Fourteenth Sue t Theatre, and took Fedora on the rood. This play has been a marvelous success, nnd Miss Davenport in it hns shown nn emotional power simply marvelous to those who remember her when she was at Daly's Theatre. But, ob! Venus, how old tho fair Fanny is getttng to look since she commenced to reduce ber at one time more Iran ample proportions "New Advertisements. Swept Mo tie Stream. One Thousand Acres ef Land and "Bight Smart of Bears.' On the deck ol a big MlulislppI steam boat stood an ngccl Southern planter. Indi cating by a sweep of bit arm the waters the boat wag patslng over, Iiosald to a pnfjtnger Irom tho North; "Wlien 1 w twelve years old I killed my first bear on a new plantation my father was tben cutting out or a forcit that Krew dlrcctlj-over the waters ol tnlibend. That was a mighty good plantation, and there was rlxht smart or bears there, too. Hut that one thon;and acre of land went Into the Sllftlsfippl ycari ago." It Is putting-no strain upon the figure to say that great roresti or youthful hope, wo manly beauty nnd manly Mrenght are swept lntbmatne way every year Into tbe great turbid torrent of dlteate and death. Yet It honldnotbe so. That It li so, li a dls irraco as well a loss. People are largely too carclcts or too stupid to defend their own In tercsts tbo most precious of which It health. That gone, all Is gone. Disease It simple, but to recklcfeneis or Ijinoranco tbo simplest things uilvht as well bo complex ai a propo sition in Uonlo Sections. As tho huge West ern rlrcrt, which to often flood the cfllej along their shores, arlte In a Tow mountain rprtnsrs, ro all our ailments can ho traced to iinpuro Dirou nnu a smau group ordltoruered orirans. Tho most effectlro and InrlnMve remedr for disease It PAltKKH'S TUN10. It goes to tho sources oTpaln and weakn.-ts. In ro rpnnso to lit action, the liver, kidneys, stom ach and heart bcxln their work afresh, nnd dlteaso Is driven oat. Tho Tonlo Is not, how ever, an Intoxlcan. but cures a desire Tor strong drlnlc. Have yon dytpepela, rheuma tism. r troubles which havo relured to yield to other ngenttT Here It yonr help. CATARRH Causes no Fain or Breafl. Gircs Relief at Once. Mali pii or suns: ApplieJwitii finger. Tiwnf Hay-eever treatment will CURE. Fries SO cents, by mall or at drairtlits. lull X Ul(UTUJ.r(a. ATU3V1SII, HuirfO s'afcesasa tJ. S Sis .: J Z ls2ll 55 etas s I DeeJSTfTniW c Mug 3 sissi 8 liiRrooease -5 .lal-Ssi To the Ladies of Leliighton & Vicinity ! :o: Miss Alvenia Graver Announces as follows it I havo Just visited the City, and purchssed a large assortment of tho Latest Novelties in FALL and WINTER 8tyles of Ribbons, Flowers, Piumes, Notions, &c., Bought at Lowest Cash figures, and which I am offering nt prices fully as advantageous as you can buy for in the larger cities. Please call and examine my stock. I AIM TO GIVE SATISFACTION. Agent for the Bethlehem Steam Dye Works. Ilemcmbcr the Place, Miss ALVENIA' GRAVER, scp29-3m Hank St., next to Reber's Block. fall and Winter Stoek ! &.C., lc. Our Young T.adles and Ucntlemen will And It to their advantage to irlve him acall berore purrhaalna; elsewhere, as they wilt And the J1U.ST SELEOTKl) STOCK la Town AT BOTTOM PItlUES.: Oil Post Office Builds, April 4, l88J-ly BOND FOR TRIAL SOX . Bb.M t$Qb CIRCULAR WEAKKB BRlttFRCE J&ook to eea Interests I Tin ana Sheet Iron fare, House FnrnisliipeL Goods, to, to Is now offering extraordinary Bargains for Cash ! lit la tlio onlr A Kent In town for tile talo of tho Bossomer, Sunshine, Othollo, New Champion and Apollo Ranges j Montour, Lighthouse, Excelsior Penn, and Eclipse Cook Stoves ; the Princeton, Early Dawn, Belmont and Real Double Heaters, with a va riety of other Square and Round Heaters, All of which ho is now offering at tho Very Lowest Prices Alo. on hand erery kind ol STOVE UHATF. and FIKE UK1UUS. Sealer In all the belt uikeeofl'UMPd. Rootling and Spouting, Prompt and Cheap. Store on SOUTH Street, a few doors above Bank Street. Patronage Invited; latUfaetlon guaranteed, June so, UW-yl Ho! For Holiday Goods! C. M. SWEENY & SON Have received an enormous stock of HOLIDAY GOODS, comprising JlliffiSS AT3TD HITS' &OOD&, Groceries, Queensware, etc. Old Post-Office Building, Bank St. Lehighton. MOTHER if) HEALINtt STEUP. 20 Million Bottles sold in 10 years. A certain Care for Dyspepsia, all Diseases of the Kidneys, liver, Stomach, Blood, Skin and Bowels. Can Produce Thousands of Letters proring its Caroltre rowers. AS OLD AND LONG TBIEO REMEDY. IiiDoruTour 77 Airm Suuncr, vxir ions crrr. FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS. -The King of Corn Killers. The most desperate Corns, Bcniuns, Vabts a, BtxxDivx cured. Price 25 Cents. "-An Unfailing Remedy for Ilot, Swollen and Tender Fcot,ChIlblaIns,a, Price 25 Cents. Cornease Manuf 'g Co., 230, 6th Ave. Place, If. Y. City. Cornease Carbon Advocate $1 only ! fg Millinery Goods, CONSISTING OP HATS, BONNETS, Tho undersigned calls the attention of his many friends and patrons to his Large and fashionable Stock or Fall ani Winter Goofls, Consisting of BOOTS AND SHOES Of every description and Style tn the Market, including a special lino of Lady's Fine Shoes Also, a full line of Umbrellas, Rubbers, Hats, Caps, BASK Street, LEHI&HTON Read What a Patient says of it: "The Pastilles I purchased from yon In Anznat j mn must conoiusirnir mas "wmie mere is It life there Is liopc.1 Tliey did tlielr work far be- yond my utmost expectations, for I certainly did lint expect Utut a habit of FOURTEEN YEARS' DURATION could be completely gotten tinder con trol in the cxceedtnc-lr short tinmnftrro months x can nasure you mat no laisamnaeiir win Keep wo from doing all that lean lu adding io the success men mil surely crown so beneficial a rem coy, AbOTO extract fro!n nlatterdated W-Va Deo. The Pastille are prepared and sold only by ttm HARRIS REMEDY CO. MF'C CHEMISTS, 306KN.IOth.su BT. LOUIS, MO. Cm lia&'i trutaist &, tva ncsthi S3, tliei &cattj 7 James Walp, Successor to A. D. JIOSSEIt, Manufacturer ef and Dealer la all kinds of Stoves Ranges, Heaters, tfQSLB'S The - Press ! Thd ForcmnsHfiubticatl Jeweparierl For the MMial Tear, 1M Dally Preta . .... to oa Tear. .nTihi.c.0?l,nit yoar r1" be notable. Oonrrn Democratio Honfe, will be ba Ireldenu inJ?iISfV Tl,t Br.eM hlllB Protettlon SSfi Ki.I""!!1 aK" taioapltel m it cal if ,nVrt.'f ronRhl ml nH"t '""I"? political tmcirie for a qnartor of a nnm. toft.'? Vl "VMonlt the be7tn?o1iI5: tremble on tbe ere ofairreat wr ","""uf With uch an ont nokvi li ;.... which prlnti all the newVaml till. ihViKE truth about It la more than er nec,Ma?j! 1'nKSB. Telettrar.li wlrei In It. own offliw place It In Inuanlancom communication with a corns ol over fire hundred new! Kathereri dt. rlbuuj all rrr tho world TM SpIeTaf New vXLS?!" S8 wl"eh " wWthi JiSI7-1 rS 'raW C0T erery phaae of e iM!?.'." Ku,roPl "re- No piper excel" It al' the elf menu which eo to make n! I b?a; J, complete Journal P llejldes beltiKrt complete new.tn&er Tn Wekkly Pnitss hn crcral rreffl f.itnr.i which put It at the top " TheMleuSSt t' onP,a fr1nlV,:i,rr'C"ea ion trlbS! tlon from the foremou wrlteri In t on. branche.. Rive. l10 practical thlB t!t S,,I",v"!?h '"know on the torn anSln tJ fim."i, The. lteU',n5 ''""I for Women er pon Ulftflr. ti full of inriH,in. .... il.a'rof'i'roSl'c'i'.o'hT ""7 "0 . f 1? ,e,ur 9 or tne romlns rear wilt he Wibkb on Waxes and Workmen, tke rtnZZ ral comiltlons & r.sbor and thil'ort of LltC m5 wIK;1! ,"?P"d with AmerhSl i.J wh0 l""1 ''arireof this .object i.T, il1" 'J.n.eo' ?f ,e80' la It a Tile finMA"'."'"? ,bf'n al'r""1 b' year eon. will iilre tho facts as Io earnings In all thJ. rarlous Industries, the purcha.fnJ ww,r or woges, strikes, trades-unlonlsm, aftStrMloS; reldlnJJm LT ,I!,'8 ' in" tthlf home r,fi7nii,.,'u".l and ol,ier matter for r..'-; "i a5lP'tlmesforadulti mifr8vf,niCllrrei;t ""lire: acarIfulBsura. mary of dnmcs'lo nnd lorel.n news, and an the'dar 1n9s,,n " . xreat q"itton, of tho day. Sample coplti mailed free. New Terms of tho Press. I3y mall, nostaire rn. in it, rr o t n . . .. u. ... n vy,us. Dally, except Sunday, too. a mo , o.Ol a year ...!, .muiuu. ounuay, oic. a mo.,$T 60a year Sunday Press, tf.oo a year. Weekly Press tl.OOaycar. TlrnflB tt.Um ti..i . ,.'.C? onr,r"k-fnd l'ould be mad. p& The Press Co., Limited, D. 1 tf PIULADELPIIIA, Pa, AGENTS?; wanted for the I.Ives of all the irciuenis oi mo u. s. The ircrem. Imn.l.nn..., ...... i o---, .-.r.uii(W;,miifln eyer sold for less than twlco our price. Tho Instest sclllnc book In America. Immense profits to agents. All Intelligent people want it. Any one run become a successful nircnt. Terms tree. Hallett IJook Co., Portland, Malno. decle-yl .ass's ;sr3 L Sn. 8 rsIP a S-J 5 -c Y&rn 7y Y'.rn x u oo o a CO 0a3 &"ia"ii S Call early for Hood Selections and avoid the Kush of Holidays. nov.'.'4 1y, 8UltTAIRtKT. niverslde, Cnl. The drr cltmnto enreav lose, Throatonss, f all Idea, Ml p., roata, cost, five. AND HEALTH r llliitttrnfMH. rAIKhnfc thirinnhtfRl cnriaaBoi. thaushtfnl want ia: baiw, ClothnndciltbladinjCd cts, rnper 23o, Mftti rrl&ia OalJo.lttpl5j.Bont Railed, moner or tps,b7 UK. W TT E I DftuxffiIrJrAYfe. Thi t7TtBixJclallKnronifliltr.ImriinoiiU iT'owavi VkHIJOOKBIMia TO . rff rrni "rrinw, wicuiiue MTiuncnti rais uia nre rrmcrilr-i. DrfbnnUIti IrratnL Cell or writ for list of quMtbm to he tnawvred by I how deilrlng tmnntBt try mtiU. tTTw snHria.t frtm llsptpr ftbtralal wfA tMr ft4)rM, AtKrfM Hr. C I.. LBRfJK. PtmI n4 TjMn la dmrtm KEcrocsriBrtrrt ercftBld wetibeu and 4 ind nnntmii ot car dlwftM tftfltlsf klllfal jtliTileiuii, reiaU from yunuiful lndUer' tloni, to fr ladBlceiv ndiTrrtrKliiwiu D bet trnporlt vhll ell (BMhIm lark faVBOTITaW ttn. Avctl bclnf lnyoMd o by pretcftttou ctfclns f ethffr nmedlit for tbw troublet. Oel or trpo eirca lu ftd trill pMkic "1 km tmportftnt Ueu btfor Uklng trfttrtrtnt ctwrwicr. TUi renedy that hu cre4 thniii(li, aud duel Dt tcrfcr leb uvlkn tobiri aeu or chm r Uoa Tftilneo. Fonded b wt rnUB4 Brtdleal trinclp)aw Crowing in fifor ind irpol tion. XlirwiappUcatlMiWIt. UalftfdiMnKM makr lu rp- A Ridicil Cora rou SPEBHATORBHEA IMP0TENCY. B3TTootd for ever O yoaro b uao la tboa s&nds of c&aot r ico mnofBCfl psu wiio ttoca f the fcasuB ota lira ar rortmd. Tba anlmatlns denc&U af lira whkh hara ber vutcd ara gita lack Tha rtf( bo btrrfal and alu TRIAL PACKAGE. SEND ADDRESS tircDfui rapwi HARRIS REMEDY COM K'Pg Chemliti. lDQ)i nana lum ei., tu uiais, no. 0m Uoimn Truth tur, $3 j 2 uo.t5 1 3 uosths. tl HEALTH IS WEALTH! int. r, c. itfurfi kcuvk axi man tukitmht, vturaaiva'l parlHo fnr UtalfiU.piiitticM OnnTuUluaa, Tiit, Karvoua KvaraKI. Udrh, hmtwrntm finlratlna C4BM4 bftUa a of alruiiol r talcvaviraitfulna, MVaUl D rMc.,rV1aRf ef taa Uraia rlthif ta inlty aad Ua4U; la kala.fr, 4mj aa4 OOt rrrRiatars ltd Asa. Bamnwa . Laaa af rtrU ftltafi, InMa)ilr Loaaas aad tipmnalnrrhwa cud bf anrr-aiartUa af Iba bra1as Mlf-aioa rTrMis4u cnr, fcac Wsraiaoaaa toUkka trv4tMat. 9 1 a Iwti, or als box a far Ml by mail pra paU mm rcll af prira VS CUARANTES CIX DOXCS T mra r ra. W.I t rW opir re-tv4 br cm tne tx brnta, actwniftiiilrd with $ wa Will Fro 4 Iba parrhaacr tr wrllMaj iMraniM l rlNMl mar If tlta Uaaiaaaitl doa nlaLTri a rarer, fl narMte taaaatl tmljr bj CISXra A MKStWLKOV tHaratflrl,rbrafalrMa,ra. ITIia tbrfd vrRlabla lUoad I'MtSaVr. ll tmmavHtfaTy ruri Uaadaab. rM(lf atia. fariflaa lha Bkla. V allad a? wktra Capow rcpi af la trniM. CBTrpaaa4 for OblUiak. PlfiNER & MENDELQON. 320 Rneo Street. Philadelphia, Pa. FITS AIiunacIxiWIoii Phya lelain BMlablialioa cut Uiurola Mivrioru I - iorlhoCuroof , EPILEPT.O FITC-1 jypMAvuJcrurnalofXedkviai cttinr of Vplbspay, bu wlUwrat tfoubl traU4 and cvrrtl mora twa than anyethar Jlrlnrrhjalc'.an Dttssecea Ikuateaply benaatrnUhlns; ar Kaara af caaaa T JrarsO yaara' aUntlJar aaccpaafnllr era. by blm. II aa itflbllabad wark on thl cJlaea, whU h iinils atilti Urea bttlo mt tola wontWrful cor froo ri any anf. trarvbo may aant tbatr eipraas and F.AXddr M 4i'UaiTono wlhirtr arnraloaJUraaa Freol Cards and ChromosT" We will srnd Treat bv mail n Mmnl r ttt nnr Iirpe German, Vrcnch, and American Chromo CardsjOD tinted And traU arraunila.wlth a nrlceli&t of over dlflerent deaini, on receipt pi ttimp for potajfc. We will alao aend free by mail samples, ten of our beautiful Cliroraos, on receipt often cent tojKiy forpcklDand postage ; alto cncloae a confidential price list of our large oil ch romp. Agent van ted. Addrcu R GlXASOfi & Co., 46 Summer Street, Boston, Mass, WANTED BOOK Canvassers. MALE and FEMALE Te .Dfr.r. in the sal. ot our new and Important wurki ut st.ud.rd character, liars iwotlla null Imuriu. aalllnir qualtllva. V oUr a r wanrnl aud Jucrall.a bulneau aHdra. Tlu t.'D1INTl CIHlI.INUIMn , f!) J) , 1 oartli birirot, CUwloaail, OUi 3 W r Va) tg o earn (fs 1 uwm li. vwv HAREIS'W 9