juunrTji,'AJUi.woW-CT3cjrq.irTi
MI30ELLAKEOU3.
Eycrj farmer tlmuM it Icail hare on
ttunty ppr, AnJ that psper should bo ILs
Ai)TiiOat, which conUIni all the latest lo
cal ntirt. On Ijr $1 00 a year.
Seymour IUJi'ii, tho Kngllah etcher,
rftrnlly arrived In this counlry, saj-t that
ust before he left Kngltnrt he nsked'Sir
0.rge DaseDtlf Iir had ever becu in Ainorl
, nnd, on his laying he lind, asliod htm to
nil about Hi lie saitl he could tell
nothing about it) he had no Impression
elh.ul It. Whit did he think of New Yt.iM
lie didn't think nnjftlilni; nlxml it. Had
he twn toNioRara! Yi'S. What did lie
think of lit He didn't think ofll at all.
Whin was ho In America t 8lx(T-fnir years
and three muni hi ago, and lie li nntr tixty.
flye.
BKINltV MEN.
"Weill Ilratlh llsnower" restores health
and rigor, cures Dyspepsia, Iinpolenecdex
oal D.-Uility. $1.
A man who ventures upon the study of
tclenee stcr his ninrrlapo is apt to have his
mind dlver'ed by nunv considerations that
do nut properly arise from that study. A
younj Brooklyn husband hain't fiulsted
half a down chapters of a work on geology
before he observed to his wilei '"My dear,
1 wonder if tlio. women of the glacial epoch
hart. cold font."
Fitmoodle is a Klmrod who goes out
ynrj often, and brligs In n rabbit r two.
Filznoodle Is an enormous ejter, and no
body cdse gts niucli of the rabbit. "I won
del why nobody gels any of the shot except
me," vs FiUnoodle, taking a grain of sli t
out of his mouth. "Because nobody rise
gets any of the rabbit, I suppose," replied
his wife, with tolling sarcasm.
' "ROTJOH OH EATS."
CliMra o.it r.it, inleo, roaches, llirs, ants
bsd biict", skuiiki, chipmunks, gophers, lac
Druggists.
A debtor, who wns sued by his credit" r,
cknowlfdced that ho had borrowed tin
money, but declared that the plaltiir knew
that It was a Kathleen Mavourncen loan.
"A Kathleen Mavourncen loan," replied the
court with a pur.zled look. "That's il.Judge.
one of tho 'It may be for years, and it msy
be for iiver," sort.
Pa-mers and others deMrin; o gen
tttl, lucrative agency business, by which H
to $20 a day can be e irnc I, send mMrcsi a'
tine, on posl'nl, to II. C. Wii.khsos ,t Co.
193 and 1)9 Fulton sireat. New Yirk.
CHAS. M. SWEENY & SON
Aret offering extraordinary inducements to nil Buyers of
Choice Groceries and Proyisions,
DItESS AND DRY GOODS,
NOTIONS, OIL CI.OTIIS,
Qucenswnre, Wood and Willlow . Ware, &c.,'
BT DURING THE HOLIDAYS !
Bemcmbcr the Place,
Old Post-Office Building, Bank St.,-Lehighton.
to 1 plnl food, SuW tvury w litre, or sniil by null W 8 Icitcr-slniuj'S.
An nnpJuli Veterinary Kurreon antl Cheralit. Ttnw
traveling In this country, skyt thfct most of ttit
llornt! timl C.utk l'uui.tri fold In? re a ro worth
Ina troth lin tofilhnl Rhnrt.l nna t V.n.t I il.tn
.rowdfrs nro nb-tlutelv pure nnd Immense. y
.Not tun if on eirtti will m ike lietn Iny like ShcrUtnu' Ccwittion I'owilern. Ie.lteiupootifa,
i. a. tjuuxtux a wo, uosrux, habs
Hi
mm
Emm
Dr.
INDIAN BLOOD SYMJP
J Cures all diaeasca of tho Stomach, Liver, Eow-
el3, Kidneys, Sirin and Elood. Millions testi-
ify to its ofllccoy in healing tho above named
diseases, and pronounce it to ho the
Me Mark, west remedy known to man.
Guaranteed to Cure Dyspepsia.
OSTA GENTS WAN T E D .Jgfl
Laboratory 77 West 3d St., New York City, Druggists sell it.
IjYKENS, lucrum C6.. Pa.
Dr. Ci.Anic JonMow:
My bmlr was llloratly mrrrml w'lli Tftlcr. for which I could irt ro ndlcf until I took
JourlNU.'i.. J1LOOU SYItl'i which lias ellcclually cured inc. I recommend It highly.
UNOOII III'IJOER-
Inatins Donnelly, in a recent work,
devotes a whole chapter to explaining llic
"Ktre of a Myth." Tho thing can b.
dnno tip in four lints. A mylh is a dry nil
well run In the interest of six men who us
it to work the market and enrich them
jelrca at the expense- of six or seven thuus
and "Iambs."
On Thirty Days Trial.
Tint Viii.taic Uklt Co., Marshall, MIc1-.,
wilj sond Dr. Dv'a Celebrated Electro Vol
lie Tt-U an 1 E'oetrin Appliances on trial
tor tiiMf diva to men (young nr old) who
ara ofllicleil with nervous .loUilitv, 1'1 yl
llnity an 1 kindred !n"iol-i. guaranleeing
spee-ly Kiid omiplct. rMto'atloii cl' henlth
od manly yigor. N B. Mo risk is Incur
re.'l, as thirty days' trial is hIIowcI. 5.1y
A Ciliforuli liny Kiood an uinbicl'a in
a pitr'c doorway during a rulirtious meet
ing, the umbrella was attached to a Hrong
ronljtlle end of'which tlio boy held In Ms
hand. Eleven different people nro said to
havo carried tho umbrolla tho length of the
itrlnj.
All the money that Gambelta left he
had saved, from liis newspaper busiiiftf.
All tho money wo hao-.lcU is also in the
newspaper business. In fact our monct
Ins been In it so long llirro isn'L any of it
left.
nil
mwmi column.
IS MANUFACTURED Bt
FISH BROS. & CO.,
RACINE, WIS.,
WE MAKE EVERY VARIETY OP
Farm, Freight and Spring Wagons,
And by confining ourselves strictly to ono class of work: hy employing none hnt tho Bont
of WOllK.ISliN, using nothing but FIltST-CLASS IMl'ltOVliD MACHINERY and the VEKY
I'.EST of KULKCTKD TIMBER, and by a THOUUUOU KNOWLEDGE ot tho business, we have
Justiy earned the reputation ot making
''THE BEST WAGOftS WHEELS."
Mannfactnrers bare abolished the warranty, but Agents may, on their own responsibility, give
tho following warranty with each wagon, If so agreed:
Xf 'e Hereby Wnrrnnt tho KISn BROS. WAOON No to bS well made In every panic-
ular and ot good material, and that tho strength of the t.imo Is sufficient for all work with fair
usage. Should any breakage occur within ono year from this dato by reason of defective material
or workmanship, repairs for the same will bo furnished at place ot ealc, free of charge, or tho
price ot said repairs, as per agent's prlco list, will bo paid In cash by tho purchaser producing a
sample of the broken or defectlro part an evidence,
0 Knowing wa can ;alt yon, we solicit patronago from every section ot tho United States. Send
for Prices and Terms, and tor a copy ot TilK RACINE AGRICULTURIST, to
JI91.A uitva, k Lu,f uocinei will
BunliRht in Stables.
D. D. Blade, M. D., wrltes lu IheMcrieuZ. ,
tfri'.,f (or February. .p- j . j
All barns, stables, sheds and other Wild
ings. Intended for the shelter of domestic
animals, should bo to arranged a; (a cjnn
maud all Iho sunlight possible. -For tint
putpose, invarllly place. the Kills on the
eastern nnLouthern tides of the building.
Tlio windows should bo large and sufficient-
lr numerous. There is no fear of too mnch
tunliglil, cither In the house or barn. We
have na right to deprive our animals, any
more than our children, of that which lias
been diffused so liberally, There is no ob
jection to placing animals In tho basement
or cellar of a building, If due caro is laken
to proyido against dampness and darkness.
In fast, if tliottablo Is properly constructed,
tho ground floor should bo the warmest iu
winter, and tho coolest in summer. Every
animal seeks the sun, and will comfort it
self by basking in its rays. Let thorn Kur
freely into barns and cellars, and bui'd
yards so that while sheltered from tho cold
winds, they may be open to tho winter's
sun, Irom the rising until tho going down
ol the same. Some i.biecttfl'lliedirct!sun-
light falling upon the head and face of tho
horsn as injurious to. iho tight. It is much,
more to bo feared tbat the animal will thy
an I start upon the road, if lie Is kept In
darkness and then suddenly exposed to a
bright light. The use of blinds, or curttins
during the hot months, may, under certain
circumstances, be advisable. Darkness is
sometimes conducive te repose, and indi
rectly, this reposo to the process of fatten
Ing, but with darkness, both Tilth and ne
gleet are too apt to be found. The barn,
cellar, or basement, is not onlya convent
ence, but ollcn a necessity. If Ibis is com
mndioua, with ample meant of light and
ventilation, easy of access for the removal
of manure, then (tin farmer has nil that car.
bo desired in tins way In most stable," the
provisions for pnper ventilation ore de
ficient, nnd consequently atninoniacal va
pors from Iho fermenting manure heap,
penclrato the apartments above, whicli
aro loo often ill ventilated, and exert an in
jurious effect upon the animal! there con.
flnod,and do much damage to harnest and
carriage!.' When the basement, or cellar of
a barn la needed for other purposes, as for
the storage of vegetables, or where It is not
practical to have a reHr, a pit may be dug
ut the side of the building, over wbicl
shed may be erected. Thus, in my own
stable, a lil.or outside cellar, receives the
horse droppings through a sliding door, on
a level witli the II or of the atable, while
over the pit is the row stable, the dung flom
which is thrown through an opening pre
teclcd by a sliding door. The pit may nlsn
servo lor a pig pen, if eivcred and rntecled
unl ut tho tame time open to the sunlight
and air, clemenls essential to the well. being
of twine, as of other animals.
-Th! 1110M obf-tinato cafes of Catarrh n'
Has Fevirnro cured by tho ufo of Elv'f
Jr.im UjIiii the only agreeable rcniodv.
Prir 50 els.
Apply Inio.ninliila with little finger.
From Major Diwnr, Military Instructor.
Ml. IMeaianl Au le ny. Sin; Sing, N. Y.
D iring lha very cold weather I was sillier
ing wt,h Catarrh. My head anil throat
ached so severely that 1 was obliged to give
up every thing and keep timet. Ely's Cream
Balm was anggiwtpil. Wiihiu un hour from
tho firnt iipplieslion I lelt relieved.tho pain
began to su'wide. In two days was euliro
ly cured. W. A. D.wut. Feb. 15, ISSI.
My son, 3d nine, veirs, was iifllieted
with Catarrh, tho use of Ely's Cream llalin
oUVcte.1 n complete euro. W. E. llaiuuiau.
Druggist, East'in, Pa.
One of tlio siddest mnmsnts in life is
when n man is I mliiiig through an obi veil
tad tbltiks he has loiiud u ten cent nicer,
which, when brought to light, turns out to
be n cough loienger.
Half the fools in the world think the
can prescribe for tbe sick better than the
d telor i two thirds Ihlnk they can preach
better than the minister, nnd all of them
know they can edit tho papers letter than
tbe editors.
I is presenting to the public n mode id
treatment fur the euro of any m those lor
r I tile disease that fillet mankind, it is but
just and proper II. at lha principles upon
which it is foudeil'ahauld hn set Ibilh in ns
clear a light s piislble. Tho time for re
rrecy in such matters is p.iHt, and any plan
if treatment or remedy, that will not bear
the closest scrutiny of scientific investiga
lion must be regarded with supicioii. It it
rarely in tho history of medicine that all
the indications of di.e.tso have been met by
a si u x e remo ly or combination of remedies,
U'lt after a conllnlid anil accurate tibser.
T.'ition of all the pheiioiiicn t iiltetuling the
cotirsa of an Mluiost counties! iiuuiter of
cases of K ipluro, nud extending over a long
term of years,. a preparation has been grad
ally perfected, which, In a most sitrprislnj
and satisfactory manner meets Iho txite
rHtuironienls for the permanent Relief and
Curd of lliinliire, oven in its tit it ohttlnat
forms. Fjr lha lunellt of Ihow of our read
crt who have nt hid the npinrtiiniiv of
letting tho in lill of Eteelaior l'.uplu
Trmtmnt for Iheiiilolres, wo ok Ih it you
send to K. M. Merrick, UletitUiiri. a. i
for his Free Uonk on Rupture.
J, F. HALBACH,
MusiC DbaleR
HO ISUNACQUAINTIO WITH THI OEOOHAIHr Of THlSCOUH
TRVW1LL6CCDV EXAMINING THIS MAPTHAT THE
-AND-
l ns tructor in Music
LEHIGHTON, Penna.
A full line of all kinds of
10lUUiUi
Sheet Music,
MUSIC BOOKS, &c,
1 constantlv kept on hand at the Ware-
Itourn, near the L. i S. Depot.
Sole Agent in tbe Lehigh Valley for
Belmine: Pitmos !
Call and sco I hem; they have no superior.
Also, Agent for
We'ber, Becker, Connor and
J. P. Hale Pianca,
Ami various Males of 0H6ASS
Instruction given ot Pupil's residence on
Piano, Organ, Vi ice and Tliei ry. o
A Mm to Yomiwlfl
ON' Till: LOSS OF
Poor Peyche! A Sew York inlliloiiaire,
in showiuz his new Inline to a friend, said
''Here is a niche I'T a I'ili."
Woman it a niiracla uf divine rnnlra
diction. Miche'et.
Kit Perkins and Sojourner Truth nirt
the other day. It was tho lint tlmo III t
11 and truth ever came so near to each
other.
tffDon't wear dingy or faded things
when tho ten cent Diani-md Dro will make
lb' m as good as new. They ate peificl.
A I.eeturoon he r.'..lnre. Treaiicnt and
Radleal cure orSjoilnal weaUna, t Sprio.
atorrho.i iodtiOiKl liySell Ai'Ue, Iniol intnry
Kmlssions, lioiHitercy, Ncvous llctilllty, and
loipa.llineiits to Marrl ue voncrallv i 'on.
iiii-rion; t:plleisy ao.1 Ki.a; Meiral nod
I li)le.il Jheipiclty. &.c l)y ltiiil!:.ir .1.
II I.VUKWI'm., :d. 1., author vr tt.o
"Qrecn Hook." No.
Th worl l-rerownvd author, in till iidtnlr.
ahU Lieture. clear yiror.sluro t,is otrii o.
Iierli'iieo ihar th awful coarciju.Mices of srp
4bu.e may to ettectualty rcinop,l uitiuiil
dangerous su'iul opratlo a. liouil in
ptriioiants, rmus or cordials: p.ilntloix cut a
motteot euro a oneo eaita uaude eiaal, bv
u hleh every xullerer, n-j m it'er wh t Ins con
dition iniy be, may cure Llnisulf choaply.
vnvaieiy nu r.tuieauy,
VThultcturt ivlllprovfa to.aa to Aau
Bimi una oioiiiuhis.
Suit ucdi r teal. In a ntalo eat ctoee. to nm
address on receipt ol six ceuts, or two pot
ato si.tiups. Address
The Ciilwnyt'll Mpillcnl Co.,
41 Ann St., New York, Jf . Y i Post OfJlcc
HoX1a. Dei ;, Jssu.lyr.
CeiGAGO.ROCKISL&ND&PACIFIG R'
JJy tho central position of it line, oonnecta the
kstand the West by theahorteit route, nnd car
rier pasaeofCfrs, wlioout change of can, between
Chicago and Kamaa City, Council Slufla.Leaven
worth, Atchison, Mtnneapolla and 8u Paul, It
con recta in Union Depots with all the principal
lines or road between the Atlantic and the Paclflo
Oceans. Its equipment Is unrivaled and magnifi
cent, being composed of Most Comfortable and
Beautiful Day Coaches, Uaffnlflecnt Ilorton Be
cltnluc Chair Cars, Pullman's Prottiest .Palacs
Sleeping Cars, and the lien Lino of Dining Cars
In tha World. Three Trains between Chicago and
Hlssouri Klver Points. Two Tralna between Chi
cago and Minneapolis and tit. Paul, via tbe Pamoua
"ALBERT LEA ROUTE."
A liaw and Direct Xalne. via Sena tnd Tttnlra..
kee, has recently been opened between Illchmond,
Korfolk.Ncwport News, Chattanooga, Atlanta, Au-
Sfusta, Nashville. Louisville, Lexington, Cincinnati,
,ndtanapolis and Lafayette, and Omaha, Minneap
olis and at. Paul and Intermediate polnta.
A11 Throuffh Pasjencers Travel on Fast Express
Trains.
Tiokcts for sale at all principal Ticket Offices la
the United States and Canada.
Uaggage cheeked through and rates of fare al,
ways as low as competitors that offer leas advan
tages. JE'or detailed Information, get ths Maps and Fold
Crs of tho
GREAT ROCK ISLAND ROUTE,
At 70ur nearest Ticket Offloo, or address u
n. R. CABLE, E. ST. JOHN,
j Vloe-fiM. si u.nl ll'i'r, (lta'lTkLrui,Att
CHICAGO.
T THBS 15T!
WohavostorcslnIO load Ins Cities,
from which our accnti olitaln tholr itin Ilea nulcLlr.
t'jr l'nrtorlfj, a 'til l'rliteipnl (flilren are at
from which our agenti olitaln tholr sttri Ilea qulcVly.
Jriv I'a. JSdai for our htsr Cutulosuo uid
termi t'j font Addters
312 Lncitavtanna Avo
11 13 UUVLiZi uCf!ATOiii PA
M. N, LOVELL
, f 'li.!tl(. I.t aii RlV.l A .1.
? A11' lwa.uifttjfc. .tlii,i 1 autu-i.
i - . - j r in its" iiLtiTi r u
, W A II I !!( b I! Vttytt 1 M
1 !-UlU.KtHM-Sl.liOt.l.-ttf;ttM
IK. tsCL??, .,M.-..itwa4.iiM.l,aVJ,1,
fceimilealy uat t.'llinj Jeyell that
lirvwrr liari been ilri'nnl in lilt un va',
"All," wut Jeyell'u remark, " Jjallug on hit
own watery tier."
"Dues he know any thlncjT" auxlmuly
Itirjulreil a Irleoil bemlmgover I he Uuty .f
a icin urhu hml jiitt fallen from the rcol uf
t lwuie. "D.'ii't know, I'm sure," tht jihy.
tieitu rllel, ''h never JM know tny.
tiiiiif, but yuu i-Jii'l toil what rllVct the (ill
M.y havtf Usil Ui..a htm until he rrgaiut
tvatcUuincM."
mm
(it
Sl2
t'jt'ts WlllSt ALL Lit tilt:.
JtailCoosUtiyrup. T'.i1 tfiiod,
Vsalnilme. bufa t drurtwu.
r-tJI.INTnN lillirrN'tSY, InsliUnal.h
IIiiot ana Nnuu Makkii, Ham. SI..
Ltlilxlit, All Mork warruntut.
"money "is'masb
ty Jmllelous Investments In Villi Slrttl. Wi
send FEEK. tnau j uililnir. fall Inluriuntlcn
ut a tvstcm lit urai g liywlilett su'tsu!
1 810, if 2 5, tSlQO ur mum of. in rni.ru tarui
i niuj-s. EUOAP. BC0TAY i CO, f, VaV
I Street Hew iurk- w- ,l ut'
Be Beady Early.
A tensnn nf octivily is near at homl
Sjirin is iiiinin?, with i.ts irtssiiig worV
Are farmers ready fnrsmving nuil lanlii;?
uvery implement tnnuit uu iirnvnnii pj
Inichanil, that nn timo may be WBSlcd n
making purchdses or repairs alter Hie work
luu M lein. Wo Kavo known a linlf-.ilsy
of jihuvins In be lost because the wliidle
troes nerc not at hand. Some farmers ktart
nut with their spring plowins without
single plow point in stork, and when one i
n'c led, tlio team is taken from the fiel
and driyen to the store. Such a loss nf time
is a serious mutter, and should be Ihouji hY
Tully guarded against by ample provision
of all such articles ol tho farm. It is u po.
t'me tn mend a harrow wicn it should be at
work in the fnl.l.
We do not favor thai economy if It may
bj scT'called that relict upon Ihene'sh' ort
for innriv of tho tools ot the' farm. There are
certain farm implements that may be owned
in partnership, at a roller or reaper, but the
constant borrowing nf rakes, forks, etc., li
not a wise and economical prnctlce. Be
proridi d with all these essential farm tools,
and have them In good order, and at hand
when the time arrives for using them.
Now Is the time lo look tn there matters,
and makn' alt needed preparations for, the
busy dsyt that will toon be here. In the
peaco of winter prepare for tbe wtr of spring.
Aqriculturitt.
BOTTOM. PRICES!
FAIB BJDJLIiinTG
M Winiermnte's BOTTOM Price Store
A full line of Fall and Winter Goods at LOWETJ,
PRICES THAN EYER. I hare just added a nice Jine
ot men s, X outns and Boys
bqsmj qq(ds mmm
to my stock, and at prices that are away
Why? Because I bought thein low and for cash
and will sell them low. Call and examine stock be
fore you purchasing elsewhere. No trouble to show
Goods and g'iye Prices. W. S. WINTERMUTE.
Sir
"STd&ia cstEa get JPwe
o
tieHe2im$. every! laiEig
usually kepi Bus sa
fflrs!-cfitSBss sirui?!ore
);pfBsf !e !he Cartou
l9
The. American Antianariau
ORIENTAL JOURNAL ! !
1'iihlislicd by JaMcanx & Mors. Chicago,
III. $.1perycHr. Edited by Strtuktc D,
Ykkt, devoted to Clussic.il, Oriental Eu
ropean and American Archrcology, Il
lustrated. This Jonrnnl gives li formation on discover
ies and explorations noil lands, ami is very
vulit-ible to those uho aro following Ariti
quarian subjects as well as to tbe common
ealer. aprS-tf
Ee o j tho Cattle under Cover,
Even now, In some of the rewer regions
of the West, the easiest way to gel rid of tho
manure is considered the best. The Eng
lish farmers have long been obliged to feed
farm animals largely for the fertilitcrt they
yie'd, and this has proved thnl covered
yards are the most economical. These cov
ers aro not so expensive as might be sup
pised at first thought. Substantial sheds,
l-trjc enouich tn accommodate a hundred
liea I of c. t le, niav be built at a eoit of from
$1 1)00 to $1,S(I0, according to the locality
mil price of labor and lumber. Tbe roof
tn y be made with threo ridge txjles rest
mg upon outside walls, and two rows ol
pillars. There should be ample provision
or ventilation and the escac of the waler
falling upon the roof. .The original cost
will nut be many dollars per head, and the
intention this will represent the yearly
cost. If this should be placed at two dol
lars fur earh ntiilnal, it will he seen that
this outlay is more than repaid by the Ir.
'reaicd value of the huused manure over
that made in tho open yard, ami exposed lo
ihcsiinand drenching rains. The saying
u fH.l consequent upon the warm protec
tion of Iho animals has been carefully esti
mated to le at least one tenth the whole
aiiooint cmiumed. In thetaviiigalone the
covered yanl gives a handsome return upon
the investment. Agricultural.
gHE GREAT OyKEI
1-03
K-II-E-U-BI-A-'iT-S-S-JJ
A It la far all the ralnTol diseases of tho
KIDNEYS, L1VU.1 AEJD BOWG1.3.
ItcleanseatUoaystcmcf the acrid xxataoc
that caoaea tho droodful auScrlnxr whir!-!
only tho Ticuma 01 rheaaiaucra can ro-uisc-i
THOUSANDS CP CARES
of tha front farm cf thfa terrible t'l'eaoc1
havo boon quloklj rcliovoJ, and la lAiortj
IIUQV
PEKrCUTLT (JUI lu.
ruin tu LioriD r prt. solo hr uuic cists.1
IWEIJiL UlCHAnDSON & CO., Itm linrton.Vt
CJnrcd tan I5ays
By the Combined Treatment of
EXCELSIOR
RUPTURE PLASTER
AND
HEALING COMPOUND !
Positive evidence ef Wonderful Cures sent on rsrsipt of 3c. tttnip.
July IS-yl
Addrrts,
F. II. SIERUICK, Ogdenslmrg, K. Y.
WE are lew HEADY for WALL IBABi
WINTER DE-COTE."
T. L. Miller Co,.
llaUSISt AND IlirOSTUS Of
HEREFORD CATTLE
COTSWOLD SHEEP
BERKSHIRE SWINE.
Bcecuxu, WjilCo, iLuspia,
Cow Womea are Esteemed.
Of all tilings that man possesses, women
alone take pleasure Iu being possessed.
Malherbc,
Woman Is a uroblcmj man's gTcstsst
ludy It to find her out.'
Woman Is most -rfecl when most wo
manly. Gladstone.
rShaliepeare has no heroes he Las only
heroinet. Kusliln. '
A liaudsouie. woman Is n jewel a good
woman is a (le.imre. Sadl. . I
ICwnntin lost ut E.lrn,tnch at the alone
can restore It Whltller.
To a gentleman every, woman.it a lady
iu right of ha" tux. Dulrtcr,- .
All that I am my mother made me. J.
Q Ad a mi.
Wm. M. Morri.f n, Wrighttville,
taj s i "I have Mind Ilnwn' Iron Biltert
t be a great ap;eliur aud health rest'iring
iHjJicino."
Persons wishing to buy Woolen and Cotton Goods Cheap
for Cash this Fall, will do well by visiting our place of business ;
our store is filled with a large stock of Silks, plain and bro
cade Satins, Plushes, Cashmeres, plain and brocade
Yelyets, Henrietta and Ladies' Cloth ; a full line of Cheap
Ladies' and Children's COATS & DOLMANS a specialty; Skirts,
Table Linens, Sheetings, Pillow Casings, Tickings, Flannels,
Muslins, a full line of Blankets, Bed Quilts, Table and
Floor Oil Cloths, and in short everything usually to be found
in a First-class Dry Goods Store. In
our stock is one of the largest in the county, comprising Men's,
Youth's, Boy's and Children's SUITS, OVERCOATS for all-large
and small, Skating Coats, Cardigan Jackets, HATS, CAPS, Hosiery,
Collars, Cuffs, a full line of Neckwear, &c. Our celebrated WHITE
SHIRT has no equal at 85 cents. Coa'ZMt"-
JOSEPH JONAS,
Obcrt's BuiMiug, IBank St., lielBIifosa9
April 29,1882 ED. W. FEIST, Manager.
CONONDRUMS". !
What did Jack Frost sav
when he kissed the violet X
Wilt thou 1 And it wilted.
Why does o man permit
himself to bo henpecked 1 Be
cause he is chicken hearted.
If I were to sco you riding
a donkey what fruit would I
be reminded oil Tho pair.
Why was Ituth very rude
to Boaz 1 Because she pulled
his cars and trod on his corn.
If a Colt's pistol ha six
birrcls, how many ought a
horse pistol to havd Wc give
it up.
What is that a cat has, but
no other animal? Kittens
did Cain hate
As long as he
v; ,
How long
his brother ?
was Able,
Why is a steel trap like the
small-pox? Because its catch-
What is that wc often- re
turn yet never borrow?
Thanks.
How do you spell blind
pig in two letters? PG
without the I.
What is that which put on
the table and cut, but never
eaten? A pack of cards.
Why aro hogs more intelli
gent than human beings? Bc
causo they nose (knows)
everything.
Why is a man hung better
than a vagabond? Because
he has visable nn ans of sup
port. Why is a pair of skates like
an apple? Because they
have both occasioned the fall
of man.
Why is an umbrella like a
pancako? "Because it is ssl
dom seen after lent.
Why is a shoemaker like a
true lover? Because he is
faithful to the last.
Why is a dog's tail a great
curiosity? Because no one
ebcr saw one before.
irhen a boy falls into the
water what is the first, thing
he does? lie gets vvcr,1
TFlicn will water s'oprun
ning down hill? lichen it
gets to the bottom.! "V. ' .
l!rhy is the lct'ttrf'ic'i'ike a
pig's tail? !Bcci'u'ia;if's'ia't the
end of porky ',. ' . i
Im y is a dirty" man - like
flannel? Because, libi .shrinks
from washing.
TFhy is an egg like a colt?
Because it is not fit for use
until broken.
What is the difference be
wecn a fisherman and "a lazy
school boy? One bates his"
hook and the other hates his
books.
If old Nick should lose his
tail where would he go to get
another? To a grog shop, for
there bad spirits are retailed.
Is there a word in the Eng
glish la iguage that contains
all vowels! Yes, unquestion
ably. IFliat is the difference be
tween a donkey nnd a postage
stamp? One you can't lick
with a stick the other you
stick with a lick.
iriiat is the difference be
tween a French pastry cook
and a bill sticker? One puffs
up paste and the pastes up
puffs.
irhy are cowardly soldiers
like tallow candles? Because
when exposed to the fire they
run.
THiy is it easy to break in
to an old man's house? Be
cause his gait is broken and
his looks are few.
A coward boasting of his
courage may deceive many
strangers, but he is tho laugh
ing stock to those who know
him.
If you count the sunny
and cloudy days of a whole
year, you will find that tho
s u ns hine pretbrainatcs. .
Ovii'.
Anyone who is prosperous
may by tho turn of fortune's
wheel become wretched.
Amminnus Marcollinus.
IHiocvcr thou art that
has become suddenly rich from
great poverty, use thy good
fortune with moderation.
Ansonius,
To avoid misfortune by
our watchfulness is not so
noble as to overcome them
by patience. Silius Italicus.
Get the Advocate $1 a
year.