HI B1W!
J, II. LARRIMER, Editor.
VOL Villi. NO. 2G.
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hard according to there termi.
J. II. LARRIMER.
JHisttlhntous.
TIM CRANE AND THE WIDOW.
TROD TUB 'I1EDOTT pirERS.'
0 no, Mr. Crane, by no manner o' means,
'Uinta minute tew 8oon for you to talk j
about eettin married again. See how
long'i Miss Crane been dead T iSim months!
land o' Uoshen ! why I know a num
ber of mdividJiwals in less time than that.
lheics 1 iiil Lennetts w idder 1 wlw a
talk in ubtiut just now she't w as Louit-v
Tierce her husband hati'ut bu dead but
three months you know, 1 don't think it
looks weil for a woman to be in Mirh a
hurry but for a man it's a different thin"
Circumstances alter cases you know.
.1 i. .. .. I
. . " "ieu as jou uc.ur. crane,
iTf. . y....u kr '
nnuxurnoie uiiiig lor your lamily to he . a Mave all I..y : oU"ht to ben a bedim
without a head to superintend the dom. n- . Iiotir ago. Th'iu-lit vou Mi ,lie wiih atiee
t.eeousarns and tend to t he Child, en-to lul.le company, hev i I should like to know
fay notion o yoursell, Mr. Crane. You! what arthly reason tou liad i sWe old
dew neel a companion und no mistake ! Crane a- ii 'ire'il,!,.' m nw. l ..t,. ... u .i
.ia niDiiins. u'mmj gracious: u ny .vijuire
'fitus didn't nun but mx wtek after he
buried his lu.-t wife afore ho married l,U
b-coiii1. I thought ther wa nt no pertiek
ler need of his hurryin so, seein his fainic
iy wan all giowed u. Such a ci itter as
he picked out tew ! 'twas very on-nitublo
tut every man
In l. 1 j ....... II'..'.
dipersition to meddle with nubodv
''-' i naiii t no
s CO-
cirn
Th
Ineies out 'aliutr 1'.... -,,n (rw '
his pardiier hain't ben dead hot ten
months. I'o tie .--ure he uio! man ie 1 vet
but he would a ben long enourdi :io if
Kmiebi dy I knowed on'd a gin him ei:iiy
incurridgnicnt. J Jut tain't for mr tosie'ik
o'luat matter, lie's a clever old critter
And as licii as a J-w but lawful Miak's!
V s old eti.iugh lo be mv father And
there's Mr. .Smith Jubiti-r Smith, you
l.ie.w him Mr. Crane his ilo (lie't was
Aut iry 1'ike) she died lat siimtuer. and
lie's bell i-oUiliU'll round ainmig lle-v.im-meii
ever .-inee, and he m iy stjuint fur all
the gnod it'll dew him so f ir as I'm emi
aariied, thougil Mr. .Smith's a respectable
man, quite yuimi and haint no family,
very ell i;f tew, and quite ititelleetilile,
but I'm purty partieier. 0 Mr. Crane !
it's ten yer eotne Jim.iwary sim e I wit-nes-ed
the expilat'nui of my beh.ved c in
pHiiiuii. An unc'iioiiK n lung time tu wait
to be taire. but it aint easv to fio.l enny
IkkIv to ti I Ihe place o' Ilc.ekier Reijutt.
1 think you're the most like hu-bmil of
any indiwiddiwal I ever -ee, Mr. Crane.
&x mouths! imii Jeratiun! cuius you
should be nleared I'd think 'twustew soon,
whv I've kno'd
Mr. Crane. Well, widder I've thinkin !
about takin another
ask vou
...i i v .
-and ! thought I'd ' out Europe, in the c.-e of the higher class
je of society. Coat, waistcoat, trousers
Willow. (J Mr. Crane excii! my com
motion it's o unexpected. Just hand me
that are bottle of camfireoir the mantlety
shelf. Dew put a little mite on :ny hand
kerchief and hold it tew my nuz.
There, that'll dew I'm rather more
composed, you may proceed Mr. Crane.
Mr. C. Well, widder, I was agoing to
ask you whether whet her
Widow. Continuer, Mr. Crane, dew I
know its terrible embarrassi'ii. I remem
ber when mv deceased husband made his
supposition to me, he etanimerod and
tuttered, and was o fluttered it did seem
as if he never could get it out in the
world, and I unose it' irenerallv the case.
i least it has been
with all them that's
made pu jipositions to nie : vou see they're
ginerallv onecrtain about what kind of an
answer they're agwine to git, and it kind
o' makes em nervous. But when an indi- j
Tiddiwal has reason to suppose his attach-1
ment i resipperated, I don't see what need
mere
e is of his hein frustrated though 1
say it's quite etnbarrassin to rue; pray j
inuer. I
may say
continuer,
Mr. C. Well, then, I want to know if ,
jour willing I bbould have Meli.-sy ?
Widow. The dragon !
Mr. C. I haint snid any thing to her
about it yet; the proper way was to get
your consent first. I remember wlieu I
urted Trypheny, we were engaged some
wine hetore mother Kemp knew anything
out it, and when she found it out she
s quite put out because I didn't goto
"rnrst. So when I made up mv nnna
WtMelissy. think, me I'll clew it right,
tbist
line and sneak to the old womannrsl.
ld woman first,
Widow. OwUma.hevl that', a rurtv '
ITI18 ift poll mat smatin norl
azin iwrlite tew 1 i
'nt Melissv. hev? Tribbelation! pra-
ui anukes alive," well, I'll give it up ,
now! I Uays knowd you wa a simple j
tn Tim Crano. hut I must eonf.w I didn't '
'"ink you wa nuite so big a fool- want
-lissy dew yew ? If that don't beat all 1 1
Wlut ie.;n t.i .if . m,.t ha
tor.n. .u.i.t ..i. ... ... t.M. ...
old enouith to Imi her fn'ther and more lew !
"-Nfni;.- . ... -.-.v.
M. What a ridickilotis idea for man
tonhdiin w,mt fool. old wU
u.cmse.vesl Have Melissy I Me -
Mr. C. Wl.v.
I'd no o of being tro tdin ,7 Z ST ' "'i'" l",1Urt' 1(1111
tr you'd been so polite to nV, and made fl?l? "g ml,nM Counsellor rioy
8UJi.n um over me and the ijhl? llu. " M rr the mark in lis
Widow. Shot your bed Vim Crone- 'Cn' l JuI.1 Mani"is- "The
nunc' yer. a, tome. Tbero'H yer 1 , n re amucU n,ore accomplished
that are table. n,l l. ?,c' ,lut " I?!' ?. point of eallantrv. 11.,.',, il.ni
i iijb u.ior and
he sooner you put on on and march out
' u.ior riiu
l - , ....v. until;!! y
llie other, t in l.nii.... ...:n i -
.. . . m.,lst. you more you try to pet mar-1
I' Oil fl(riiii tr rt a . . " . r
d I Advise vo r , Z:
mar-
wife's eold-a.id after ye." sai led on that
l int, jot put u little 1, t, "J -I ick on ye
hair-would a,U to your pp.
..... , it iw i 1 1 u'itur ni.4 : i"
..... .i i . .. " yer
i.,.t
85 m'.1oiiJ.i...;i i i.- . ""."" -
vour iit.n,.
1 vn,, ' ... ,i . . . . ou w,Tn
,,", " Bm.OI,.S ,.Ule
f , " . " J m V Fl )' "xt,
cplinter the sninr. nf
r inn.-
J woulden't hurt year looks a inite you'd
be entirely unrcsibtablo if you was a .
train strator
...
grain strater.
Mr. C. Well I never 1
Widow Hold yer tonpuo, vou con
sarned old coot you-I tell vou there's
jour hat, and the door be oiVwith yer
elt qim-k meter, or I'll give you a liybt
nun ine broomstick.
Mr. C. Gimmcui !
Widow, (rising) Git out I gay, nin'ta
gomg to Mand hvre and be insulted under
my own ruU and so git along, and if you
Uai'Kcn lliv door
Melis,y, it'll be the for you -That's
all.
Tmonjous ! What a buoter !
M How. Go long, go long, you evei las
tm old gum. I won't hear another word.
(stops ym.r ears.) 1 won't I won't I won't
hxit Mr. CrancA
bxter MiIUxki, ua ommmied hi Mr.
Oood eveiiin, (Kpperil Well, Melissv.
htitnut laxt, hey? Whv didn't vou hltiy
till morning? puily bufines- ke. )'n me
up so late waiii.i for you when I'm eenv
' V" . " 1 111
ino-l tire 1 to -teiith ironin ondwnrkin like
1'm..i t,e cufer; always thought he Was
a tun;l,!e fool mul now I'm convinced
on't. I'm cdiiiph Uly di.-giiMed with him,
hik 1 1,-t him know it to-night. I in hi
a piece of my miud 1 gue-s lie 11 be opt to
leiiieriiber for a spell. J rather think he
went olf with a ilea in his ear. W!ivr-.t,.
I I ,. . 1
i n .iiii nu ever near oi hulIi a
MCC J 1)1
audacity iiiuiljer Unn days? fur him
I -.in (. ran.' to ilur-t lo oxpiie to my
han't, the w ilder ot leaeon jiedoot! je.t
a if I'd condescend tu luok at him, the
"1 i iiuniskuli: lleduu't know 1$. from a
biuu:o-,ti. K, ; ,.lt i ),e'd siayeil ti.ueh Ion
g'r. i d te.ieh him the ditleieneti 1 gue.
IIe' ism his waikin ticket now 1 hope
he !! I. mine alui.e in future. And where
i-K.i-r.' (inn hum wiih t tie Cianev, hey ?
wed 1 gin-H it's the )o-t time. And now
Med-y lie f.it, you ain't to have nothin
i:lule to do with ihem gals d'ye hear.'
l-i.ui't be in a hurry. c.ipp-n, Mn l '::, be
ai.irmed at toy get tin in uch passion
al, nil u!d (.Vane's pre-u:iiptlui,s. Mebby
yuii think i was uhfeehti in me to u-e
bi't: so, and I don't say Lot wh it it wn
I'.ltlier but then lie's mj dis.igie, -nb.'e ten
me. ymi know ; tam't everybody I d treat
in Mich a way. Well, it you inutt go,
go A eneniii : Give my love tj iienner
when you wriro agin, dew call frequently,
Cappcn t aiiuot, .lew.
Crows and Scarecrow3.
r.l.u kivuod has on excellent paper on
the subject of dress. The writer allirms
that modern civilization, and rapid enter
course, have done a treat deal toward c.-
tabli - hin uniformity of costume throitrh-
. i :.. .i s.t
and I at are common to England; Fiance,
Ku-sia, Germany, Italy and Spain ; and
even the dogged Turk, ai if doMroii to
obliterate from the memory the fact thul
he is at best an intruder on thin side of
the liosphorus, has made some advances
toward the adoption of the flandard dress
of Europe. The following extract will
show the writer's treatment of his sugges
tive theme :
Notwithstanding the general uniformity
of European costume, there are certain
differences in style peculiar to the several
nations. In Germany, drew, apart from
otlioial costume, signifies lioth.ng more
than an outward covering for the body,
constructed without any ragard to ivni-
nietry, taste or elegance
ery rarely, in-
deed, do you meet with
a Oerman, espe
chilly of the central and southern states,
whose clothes do not appear 10 have been
put on with a pitchfork ; in fact, the old
remark of I ae.iius, that a German pays no
attention to the ornament of his person,
is even yet applicable. "Near the front- j
ier," Fays he, "on the borders of the,
Rhine,
ilml.i'tont. -,ir .nlllp,lin'
reseuiblinc clothes, but with an nir of neg-
loot that shows them altogether indiller-
,1 . it,. Mini,.. " It iaripl.t. l.owe.1
veJ toT om .t I m n tor rs rr n '
yer, to ext nipt Berlin ana .lam ir iro n
ths general censure, for in those cities
you do occasionally meet with individuals
inillVlilllll Is
who have tie-slowed some attention upon
the texture and style of their raiment,
which is fashioned ralherafter the British,
man me i rencn moue . ii, i-
kept in mind that in all countries where
the military service is regarue., u.e. c-
me miiiwuy Perice is ir.i i
culi .,r and appropriate profession of the
notnlity and gentry, tnestneiie o, uicsa -
revive very little attention Those who
should take the lead in setting the lasli-j
ion appear constantly in nn.fortn: iwd
the cultivation of ordinary apparel Uing
left almost entirely to the higher class,!
who e taste is seldom refined, it follows as
a t.atural conseaueneo that cross slovenry i
.Pn;u
On the other hand, the Dutch, a com-
.nrl wAulihv tieonlo. exhibitcon-
siderable tftt In dre, b'e.ng partifjlur
'EXCELSIOR."
CLKAItFIKLI). PA. WEDNESDAY, JUNIL 7,"
' -
SUtlleiOlltlv Ulwl..isi(n..rl
:this country
. . j -
appreciated in
1 no absurd u on tim, i,.
I lilt
Pve?rs ftn indefinite number of It,.,.,.!..,.
vni, .til. ,;... i . ". .
I anwuro you, in spite of your scorn,
... - - - ........ iv UUII11U
"-'lml " 'ou wnt to see handsome men
vou must im itti..-.i m - ... :
' IrV eJr J"' wn a "u-,cl'n"
i Fro, l '6 W9 8,,u11 ,,ot "I"
" B! b
, .. - - - i tin mi
I.. ,) I .. . ,.
- .. Siw ' aiujuiiiu. i i h nrfirrinu
..-.I . . " " I'uicmnnn.
eiik. The
i . . -"""ill, uni nu cioes
l... i. i
; not-, lo our tbinkin:'. alre. woll Ti.ft
I 18 u'wnys somethinir r.ur nml vi,
in Li. uPPearnnce aa if the l.,iw J
conwUered his customs ... i .
i: , . . ,. I -" '"
. lt. , . ... iv mil . n r .. ...... i. : . .. i : 1 1 . .
nil nf fnKr
1 , 'i i ,
1 110 .Uoul't
i ne- inn Kiii in i no
icuk;;; jjnnuentrt. There can bo
that, Ilia VrAKr.
ruiner lor pigphty than for comfort. He
is lond of innovations, nctv Blyles of out,
find nrtifical aoplianee, ho that with him
the fashion ol his p.irmcnts is always in a
Mate of change. It is in muill thin m a
in grout; the French cannot itlile either
. -mxj IVIIV.J"IJ III rfl.TH
ny a cou t or a constitution. Their p tea.
Cl" l)v, juoging irom tlie lust human
specimen and costume pictures w hich we
have seen, may conscientiously bo denom
inated execrable. A pinched waist to a
man is simply a deformity ; peg top trow-
. wioiiiici, ui'Oiuination,
Wo have observed wiih considerable dis.
gust, that this French fashion of peg-topf
has been imported into the RritiMi Isl
ands to the great disfigurement of those
w ho nave adopted it. The gentleman who
dresses thus may be trulv siyled a fi-h out
ot water; for, when in a m'ute of repose,
his figure bears a striking resemblance to
that of a salmon attempting to stand upon
its tad. The truth is. s we have already
remarked, that the English are very
clumsy imitators, and thev thonld never,
"ti any account, eikoy to ape the Ficnch,
who have at all events that talent or carry
ing out their eccentricities with a jaunty
assurance and impudent ioA. m,(V'wh;cii
is exceedingly amusing and delightful.
Whereas the Englishman, thon-h bold us
a lion when his blood is ip. is in ninttn
of social intercourse a reserved, ditlideni
and rather awkward being, painfully nerv
ous lest he should be made an object of
ridicule, ai d bin inn up to Ihe very eyes
if be thinks ho can detect a titter, there
fore he oni'ht never, though the tempta
lion should be ever so strong, assume
strange garments, which he cannot parade
with comfort io bin.tclf, from sheer lad;
of the requi.-ite audacity.
llajor Hoah on Hairiafje.
The la-t veteran of the pre., M. M. No
ah, held a very racy pen, which threw o!l
"pin khng paragraphs with as much ca-e
"as lue lion shakes the dew drops from
h' m.iiie !" The following isoneot the -.
"Ve like short com -snip; in this
.Viaui acted like a sensihlo man he fed 1
a deep a bachelor, and awoke to find him- j
cll'a married man. Ileajipeai o,) to have
popped the iiue-tmn iduiont immediately
.tru r meeting Md'he Eve, and she. with'-1
out any flotation or shyness, gave him a;
kiss und herself. Of the first kiss in mis ,'
world wc have had, however, out vn
thoughts, and sometimes in a poetical
mood, have wished we were ihe tnau
what did it.-' I'.i't the deed i- rtun: ii,o
cIuiiK .j ivi.s Adam's and he inim-oved it.
Wt? like the notion of getting married in
ii garden. It is good taste. We like a pn.
T::ie wedding. Adam's was private. No
envious beau was there; no aid croaking
maids; no chatting aunts and grumbling
graiKimottiers. l he turds ol heaven w
ere
minstrels, and the glad sky flung its light
uiiuii uie scene.
'One thing olsout the first wedding
brings queer things to us, in spite of its
scriptural truth. Adam and his wile
were rather young t j marry some two or
three days old according to tho sncest
speculations of theologians mere babies
larger but not older; without experi
ence; without a house ; w ithout a pot, or
kettle ; nothing but love and Eden."
A Model Editor. We copy the follow
ing paragraph from the 'llaiigtwn Spun-
:er, ana we run no risK, we itimk, in us-
cribing it to thebrilliant and prolific pen '
of one of the distinguished Dainphool I
iiiiiphi
family
"The crop of poaches in this vicinity i
would be pood, if there were any trees"; what they were up to. Now this boss be
but they all died a ye.ir ortwoa'jo; bo- 1 ngs to, or once belonged to Jerusha
aides which, the buds were ail destroyed
lust January, before they came out.
Grass looks as preen as jealotisv, and will !
yield n satisfactorily and profusely. Tiir- '
"ips a
u,n ,R
"P.!
nips am t sound vet ; hut .Npnre Screech- i
i -..
n is preparing ti:s itiree-cornered lot lor
powerful dose of them. Ofapples there
win De none, owing io uie removal oi all
nn.ireea mm kwwt nigniiornood. i
0rn,n niaaes tu preatest snow m tne ,
"I'ils bere; but there is also a fair sprink-
Pmiini1' "!m' "ur harvest is
e t)je (lkJnwit l0r0uiM)u i
f- .
'" s- -"s ,
grain ripen before they cut it. Lpon the i
whole, we have great reason to he thank- j
ful that our punipk ins and beans, and po-1
tatoe. ami cabbages are yet in -bun dunce
. . ond relieve us from all an-1
IXnrof .1, The bbaX I
,i;,r..,nn th. hon, .n,l,
, . . , . , ,
"J""'-"" ' , 7 "'.j:',."; .
- - -
Kf'Vnn, said a little four year old,
"give me ten certs to buy a monkey
U'F monkey in the hotte
now.' said lh? MnVst brot nr.
"Who 1 it Dttn ? said the little f.IIow.
"J oti." wa tlie reply.
"Then pive me ten rent to buy the,
monkev some candy." Hi brother "shel-
Wd over" irnrrfr-disfely.
I85D.
YANKEE.
Ono vf ty pleasant day in last July, us 1
was riding from St. l'oul toward A lton. 1
over ook a cl.aracfet" in the sl,p0ofa
real live niikee, who, it appeared, had
nothing to recommend him, Pavo his own
assurance ; but of that them una hi. In. L-
I nodded slightly, my fresh acquaintance"
lUlitaliiiL' a bow ns lie ii.il.-,.,!
"Morning' I mighty . pleasant day,
bquire.
"Yes, it is rather pleasant."
".Some of ahorse, that o' yourn."
1 did not reply, but instead scanned my
neighbor's beast closely. His eye delect
ed the scrutiny.
"I guess he'll do, won't he?"
"1 should judge so," I replied, no little
amused at my fellow traveler's manners;
"1 presume he belongs to you."
Ho puckered his lips, half closing his
eyes at tho sumo time, then jerked his
head hastily to one side, as he managed t j
squeeze out.
"Ye es no!" a long pause. "Wall,
stranger, I'll bo hanged ef 1 know u.o
own it," and ho made a sorry attempt nt
a laugh.
Evidently tho man was poking fun at
me, thought the reader's humble servant;
but I could not forbear remarking aloud.
"Thul is a little bingular."
The giggle died away, the grimace left
his laeu. "'Not of vou know liio hull on
il. i uui'o a now comer, 1 take it, strun
gci?" "No! I am not," I answered dryly.
"No olleiice, Squire. Come lioiu the
Iuist V
"vs." My companion blew his nose
vigorously, putted his horse on the neck,
und then placed u fresh quid of the weed
between his lantern jaws.
" Wail, about this hoss ; it us mine, an'
it am't mine ; haulaways. I'm not ur'in,
yet. it would tuko a i'hiladelpliiu lawyer
to decide on 11 ; tiui't tu tun
Ami here my companion assume J a
meditative maimer, woikmg his j.iws free
ly. 1 deemed it bett lo lNu him ids own
time t explain himself. After iiuing a
naif mile in silence, lie bloke out Willi.
"Much ucquuintei' beieabouta '!"
"Vcr, sl.-l.liy." !
"1 r -q.s you u-kn to St. Telci'S river'
or lo beiuiv ; '
1 shook my hi ad, and cr.ee nioie l.o
Ciiiiie Oack lo the ow uei .-u;p i,l toe hor.-e.
-'U all, uboul lliis yer ln..oa ; I'll bei gv
never hemd al Huh an iuVt us lii.s nu.-.
Hade ; but maybe you could jjuess where
1 come iioin '; '
"Irom Connecticut V
"Nj! fi'.'tn V't-Miiont. I'm an out an'
out . ynnkee ; naiiiu s Tieudwell; p'r'ups
oii'ye heard on Gov. Treudweil thiiL u.-i i
lo be ; he's my talhi'i'a uncle you see. j
Suiueho.v, a pour cu.-i hainl no chuiiccs j
there, ul le.i-t I uncd to think so : so oi.e
'day 1 l ulled up slakes and un -i :. t .-. I I
out hue to Mijili'.fol.i; too l I'd 1j4Ui1k.
.oi.oi, iuiini, i.iiu i mean lo do it, sotue
jtl.y. iiUeir, Ni.ijor wiien 1 come to tual
ij'i.ice oVel iheie, (pniui,iijj Majolica. ilh
linuitls M. 1'uul ;) 1 iiad hi luuie U. an a
shil.mg leu ; ihe i.L-eais u ii i.-t tootv my
; Clothes oil my bach. Now, 1 don t in. no
iciim .1,1.0 1,11 nhout it, cause tu umi I
kliu.v Jeliit.iirt, liul the re.t till cm. iuu
see, aiole 1 lell hum 1 u.-ed lo beau .lel u
siia 'imuihI lo pai lies coliMdeiaLly, jel lo
keep my hand in, you know, jciu.-uu,
shu hiimer n 'sliueu' uiti f llie, but law s '.
1 W.isu l lue Je.ifl lHu alter her. loeu
w.ts a jHHily nice feal lived Hear hoine. call
ed Su.viil i'epjiolul, uud so 1 divided 111..'
allciitioii.-, ueted luipalliul, ;uu under
slau l ; but the first ihiug 1 knew, Jeru
sha moved away with her lolks, and el you
believe it, Miaiiger, thai was the first lime
1 ever knew Jerusiia was worth a dollar.
Come, to find out she ow ned five hundred.
That ri.td me, and lo aggravate it s-u-an
look up w ith another fellow, un laughed
in my lace. .V 1 never usked unjthiii
uboul Jerusha, but Come out here. 1 jest
worked here one mouth, when 1 me' .
w ho do you suppose 1 '
"Jerusha t"
"No I" you're out; 'twas her a int an'
laws! ef we didn't laugh I Of course I hsd
to po right uloiig with her, and on the road
1 found out that Jeiusha's uncle owned
three hundred acres, with forty broke in. j 'ar tender and porter had been obliged
You'd orter seen Jerusha smilin' at ine. : ,0 ''ll1 in assistance to prevent them cut
Theold folks wanted ine in the family all ; '"' each other.
along, and I seen that they still kept al
draw in' me on soi tor kinder, lint Jeiu
slia unit no beauty nohow, un' she's pietty
tart, loo, so I didn't let on that I
knew
(she's got a yoke of oxen, und a cow, and
two pair of geese besides I the only geese
1 ever seen in the territory,) and she has a
hundred dollars laid away to buy another,
ei l conc.uue lo lo marry her.
..!!. 1-1', II I 1 .,,
jut an iiieow ioiks nearu me una
about lookin' over tbe country, on' so af-
'""it ., . sur, one nay, .-ieve,
v e ...,,- , riee . uu u.-.-s
" a our,..,.-., una eigiii, uouars. caisn,
"".V day; now you want to look about you.'
Take - the boss. Steve, puck oil' to Stillwa-
tPr, Preset)!. ( Isceohi, and them places ;
.a-,,,., time loir Tl, h. il ,,.,..
t keep or swap, ef you know what you re
about ; but nind, Steve ! ef you own the l,n;i
1 ovnyrw' Her presizely identical l:ir. -
gunge, Mr , what may your natno be?"
. . - - - . .
-M..itii ; John Smith.
'Her exact words, Mr. Smith; an' now
if I claim in, (paitini his liorso gently,)
why Jerusha claims me, an' can provo it by
ine old ioiks, io any nothing uhout a piece nt well mrnnt advice," snid the uncle
of paper I signed jest this time yesterday." Hid you ever read about the toy' Genrjr,
"Well, of course you'll marry her," I llarr"
ventured to remark, as 1 strove in vain to. ..you I11can tJlHt big wlj. h fonn.
control my muscles. dered one pleasant dav in some English
"Oh, sartinly 1 I'll be hangod ef I know harW. and all on board perished. I know
vhnll inthr hox. llnwsomerer. I'll keep something about it ; but tell me more, un
the critter, (i hut's your war, Mr. Smith, cle. Ilow did it happen."
good day !) I'm bound , to keep therntter "
And
Mr. fjeadwt:! rutted from me.
Imuttmn
, "lit ' ft rrifrr."
NKW
"I Never 6aw a J3ar filiut up."
Several yenrs ago I happened to arrive
in St. Lotus at a time when the hotels
were uncomfortably full. The only bed
at tamable was in n bed whore six other
wayfarers were lodged, at the I'lantera'
Uetel.and 1 turned in at a lut linnp ivi 1 1.
some trepidation, not having been accus
tomod to the society of strangers in such
circumstances. Tho disngreeublo novolty
of my situation, prevented sound sleeping
and while tossing uneasily upon tho mat
trass, I heard a tall und rather rough look
ing gentleman from Arkansas, muttering
some incoherent expressions, about two
o'clock in ihe morning.
unit stand tin-," he exclaimed, at
length, andsoon after he was pulling the
.eii-ioju. enci gc:icauy.
The porter appeared in due time, his
:otiiiteinmce expl osive of greut ruluotaneo.
Whut's wimied'" asked the servant.
"I want a mint julep stop, let mo see
uooMiis! a: ihe sleepers und counting
i hem oft with his forefinger), 1 want one,
'wo. three, four, five, Bix, seven juleps
about as quick as you can hurry them
up."
"Can't get them, the bur is shut up." So
saying tae porter departed without saying
anything more.
i'ue Arkansas gent seemed nonplussed.
He sat up in bed and soliloquised. "Bar
shot up! bar shot upj 1 never seen a bur
-hut up yet."
In about two minutes he was dressing
himself ith his clothes, mj addreesing
himself with the same remark. "I never
seen a bar shut up before."
Having completed his toilet, ho disap
peared, and J lay broad awake in a mu
sing mood j he Ai Kansiun, alter half un
hours' absence reappeared. He bore in
his hands a salver, on which were placed
seven juleps made in the most approved
style. 1 raised my head on his entering,
and he exclaimed: "Hello, strangtr, take
a drink, and invite your friends to do the
same."
i
explained to him Hint I had no
riei.ds in that part of the United States,
lie proceeded to trouse the sleepers, and
if memory i, not at fault, not one refused
llie cooling beverage.
" I'hiiught the bar was shut tin." I ro-
lu.u kcd.
i "Well, stranger, it war shut up the
; first bar 1 ever seen shut up, but hole's
llie tool that pn-ki d the lock," and h
diew lioui tho in-ido ofiiis coat collar a
huge bow le-kuiiu.
After iiiiiiuug bis julep to tho last
dreg-, the strange gent retired, and just as
I was composing myself io 6leep, 1 again
heard him soliloquising:
No, 1 thank you. sir. No, I thank
you, sir. (A pause.) What in hell d.d
he mean by ;'at J Can't stand that
must go down and see about it."
Again tho Arkansas gentleman arose
and went doivu stairs, while 1 lay won
dering what he was about. Soon I heard
a no'-e a- el'a .-.crioua row in the bar-room
below, and hurrying on my garments, I
descended. Several .crsons were hold
ing my Aiknn.sr.st friend, und others w ere
u-mg le-tiaining force upon another per
son in a similar manner, who, like my
fellow 1-idger, seemed heligerently incli
ned. At length their rage was "cooled,
and I was enabled to understand the cause
ul lite quarrel. When the Arkansas gen
tleman at first descended and persuaded
the bar keeper lo concoct llie juleps the
other gentleman entered, and inv friend,
in tlieuios' aiiiiiable manner, said to him
"Stranger, 'spose you and I take a pri
vate drink together before I take the ju
leps to my party up stairs." The stran
ger replied, "No, I thank you !"
Atkatisas finding 1 i juleps ready about
that time, took them tin stairs, whore u
! punished them us before slatod. After
sett ling himself in bed, it occurred to him
tual the stranger helow liu.l refused to
drink with hitu when invited, and he de
termined, on reflection, to go do'vn
and ask him what lie meant bv saving.
"No, I thank you, sir." On finding that
gentleman ourArkansns friend soon tound
tliHl be was as lull of fight as himself, and
instead ofan apology, he presented a bowie
knife. I'.oth drew their weapons, and the
.J llft n,lalr ,va finally settled with a
"' ink all tound, and the Arkansas gen-
netniin ueparteu nextday down the river.
I'Otron lltraUl.
Too Proud to taka Advice-
A boy took his undo down on Long
Wharf to see a new ship that lay there.
His uncle was on old ship master, and
Harry wa at some pain to show him
round, paitly to show him his own knowl
edge. There was only one sailor on lioard,
mid ns the visitors passed ond re-passed
the hatches, "Mind ye, mind ye." he
saia. (.on i nu inf the Hold, or ye'd
never see .layngni again. -
"There i no danger of mv uncle," said
Harry p.mdly. "be knows" ship from
stem to stem ; and I do too."
a- h.. .., .i. .
walked away. "I was so provoked with that
old salt," said he; "he seemed to think
were know-nothing landsmen, with not
sense enough to keep from pitching into
- - nun
the first danger. I wonder you should
thnnk him lor his advice, undo; I was
provoked
"I should ho very sorry to take offence
"It was at Spithead, where the English
.t. irrvrfl nt anrririr Tho P.-mi. fJ.nvt
fleet, were nt anrhnr
! wl il Pa j-sh-'j. and the Admiral Ktmri.
TERMS-$t.25 per Annum
SKKIKS-VOL. V.mD.
enroll, blue flag floated from the miren.
She was a l.ne ship ol n hundred puns
She was about ready for sea, when the
first Lieutenant discovered that tho water
ecck was out of order. It
necessarv In l.nnl :.,.- .i , .. '
wo not thought
I.. V . uock lor ro-puii-s,
but keel her over until the dmnnced
part was shove water and repuirher there
heeling a ship, you know is makihjr her
lean over one side A pang of men was
sent from tho lulmouth dockyards to
help the ship's carpenters. The larboard
guns were run out as far as possible, and
ihe starboard guns in amidships, which
made the sh,p keel to lurboard, so that
her starboard side war, far op out of tho
water, iho women hud .r..i fi. . ...
of the uter pipe, when a lighter, laden
with rum, cume along side, and all hands
were piped to clear her. Now tho prtrt
Mil ot the larboard side were m-arb even
with tho tral or before tho liglitorcame
alongside, und when the men went down
to take in her casks, the ship keeled more
than ever ; besides tho sou hud grown
rougher since morning, washing tho wnt
eiMiito the lower deck porta.
The carpenter Huw there was danger
He ran to the second lieutenant, who was
ofheer of the wateh nnd told him the ship
must ho righted. The lieutenant, nn-ry
that the carpenter should dare dictate to
him, ordered him back to his work. Grow,
ing every instant more convinced of the
imminent peril ot the ship, the man went
a second lime to the officer, worning him
that ull would be lost if the vessel was
not righted instantly; but he only got a
volley of oulhs for Lis pains. The lieu
tenant, however, at lust ordered the drum
mer to beat to Quarters: hm. Uin,.n n,.
drummer had time to lav lml.l of
Irum. t!;n ship keeled over a l,ttl nri .
little nioie, ond tho n;en began to scram
ble down tho hatchways to put tho heavy
guns back in their proper places. Alaf,
it was too late. Men may begin their duty
too late. Already the water was rushing
in; she filled rapidly, settled fast, and al most
before help or rescue could bo
thought of, down went the Jloyal Garpe,
carrying her admiral, officers," men, and.
many nobles and strangers on board, to
the number of a thousand souls, down,
down to a watery grave.si awfulle sudden,
that a few only on the upper deck couli
save themselves And to perish on a fair
day, in sight of land, surrounded by a fleet
of ships, all aggravated the terrible disas
ter. As an English poet, Cowper, luuS it i
"It was not in the battle; ' '
No tempest gave tho shock ;
She sprang no fatal letik ;
She ran upon no rock."
"Awful ; sa'd Harry, shu ldcsing; "and
to have it owing to the pride of that fool.
ih lienlenant. Too proud to take the
carpenter's advice; that wa the worst of
all. I suppose you told it to me on that
account. 1 thank you, uncle. Oh, that
poor lieutenant. His own life, and the
life of thousand others, stoked upon his
feeling proud. 1 am sure it makes the
Bible account of pride a-vfully true:
"Pride goeth before destruction, and a
haughty spirit before a lull.''
Violation or Confidenck. V.'e are so
pestered by our inquisitive acquaintance,
as to the modus operandi of Mr. Rarey,
that at the sacrifice of our word, ntid the
risk of incurring a penalty of JC5.0U0 for a
violation of contract with the illustrious
horse-tainer, we proceed to make known
to the world tho system by which the
most vicious horse is rendered amiable
and tractable. We will give the case of
Cruiser. Mr. Rarey, after somediflieulty,
approached tho violent 'animal, and hav
ing established a communication between
them w hich seemed perfectly satisfactory
to tho horse, Mr Rarev proceeded to un
screw tho fore legs of Cruiser, and to re
move ins head. Having performed these
difficult operations with considerable skill,
Mr. Rarey then introduced himself into
the interior of the animal, and remained
there some five or six minutes. Ha then
emerged, and rubbed thuhoses's tail with
a preparation of cold crenm und cayenne
pepper, replaced the head, rescrewod on
the legs, and Cruiser the terriblo was su'i
jugated forever.
6Q-The latent news from Jamaica
shows the progress of a serious revolution
ary movement on the island. It is quite
evident that a war of color and race
has been inaugurated there, which wil(
almost certainly end in tho titter ruin of
the colony if still governed as at pre
sent. Soulonque, the ex-Emperor of Hay
ti, spent the most of his time in gambling
with one of his former ministers. M. Sal
omon, who managed his ex-Majesty's fi
nances, had lodgod the greater portion of
the money remitted to England in the
hank, in his own name; so Sotllouquo
finds himself less rich than ho imagined.
"The neat old lady in this place who
scrubbed through the floor and fell into,
t he cellar, is but one apiong the many of
the very nice females with which our
country abounds. We know a pood lady
in New Jersey, who whitewashed all the
wood she burned ; and another in Con
nectictit who used three times a day to
scour the nose of her lap dog to keep him
from soiling the dish out of which he ate)
his meals. The same good lady took her
own food through a napkin ring to keep
it from coming in contact with her lips.
8SJA Louisville Judge in deoiding a
eas tefore him. -'A man has no right to
whip hi wife, but should be severely pun
ished if he were guilty of such an outrage.
Hut the women, on the contrary, have a
right lo whip their husband whenever
they please. It wss a perogntive Moning"
to them peculiarly and inalienable.' He)
was only surprised it wa not cirriod on
to a createT extent." Come, rrensr mav.
riod r.irn. hy Ytrs yotir bosoms Stl l 'ts.Vt
the sTripes. "