El
A. M. RAMBO, Editor and Publisher.
VOLUME XXXVIII, NUMBER 29.]
THE COLUMBIA SPY,
MISCIIIIIMIS FAMILY BEM
PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY MORNING. ,
OPP/OE, IN LOCUST ST., OPPOSITE COLUMO
- MA BANS.. '
, ' •
-0-- , . •
--- - TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
2,-00 a year if paid in advance
:440 " if not paid until the expiration of the
year
FIVE CENTS A COPY.
No paper will beVdiscontinued until' all =-
garages are paid unleSS at the option of the editor.
.Rates of Advertising in the Spy.
lt. 2t. St. Imo. 3mo. Om. ly.
1 sq. 8 lines 75 1,00 1,60 2,00 4,00 0,00 10,00
"16 " 1,50 2,25 3,00 3,50 6,00 9,00 15,00
•3 "24 ' 2,25 3,25 4,00 4,50 8,50 13,00 20,00
[Larger advertisements in proportion.]
.Executors and Administrators' Notices, 3,00
Auditors' and A.isignee Notices, 2,00
Professional or business cards, not exceeding -
3 lines, per year„ 8,00
Yearly advertisements, not exceeding four squares
with.occasional changes, - . 15,00
Special Notices, as reading matter, 10 cents a line
for one insertion.
- - - -
Yearly advertisers will be charged the same rates
as transient advertisers for all matters not relating
strictly to their business.
Alt Adocrtising will be considered CASH, after first
insertion.
BUSINESS CARDS
A TTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR AT LAW
Li. Columbia, Pa.
Collections promptly inane in Lancaster
York counties.
Cola., July 2, 18G5.
J. W. FISHER.,
ATTORNEY AT _LAW,
OfTico on Front Street, between Locust
and Walnut, Columbia, Pa.
fel). 10, '6G.
A. 3. XAUFFRIART,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
COLLECTIONS Made in Lancaster and
adjoining Counties.
Pensions. Bounty, back pay and all
claims against the government promptly
prosecuted.
Office—Locust Street,between Front and
Second. Dee. - 1'64.
SAMUEL EVANS,
dITISTIt'E of the ,eE4CE.
OFFICE IN QDD FELLOWS' HALL.
COLUMBIA , P.
ly.
June 18, ISCIS
J, Z. TIOFFER,
lENTIST.--OFFICE, Front Street next dim
..L.l to IL Williams' Drug Store, between
Locust Walnnt sts, Cola., Pa.
S. C. EPMENTROTIT,..N. D.,
T ATE of Reading, Pa., offers his pro
-Cession:xi services to the citizens of Co
lumbia. and vicinity. Office in Walnut St.,
belt \\ Second. July 14,'66.
FRANKLIN HOUSE.
Ctipigi-iLtitel, and is iri every
rdsPe l 6l;,adapled,tti'fineet the wishes and
lesires of the traveling 'public.
'JAC,OI - ; S. MILLE:ft,
Proprietor.
Col.. july, 15, '65
itI[SHLER'S HOTEL,
LVADT EISHLER, Proprietor.
WEST MARKET SQUARE,
READEV cr, PEIVITA.
Oct. 7th. 1t•.
' GEORGE BOGLE,
Dealer in
LUMBER OF ALL DESCRIPTIONS;
Also, PLASTERER'S HAIR
Office and Warehouse—Front Street be
tween Locust; and. Union.
July 8, ISO.
•
Confectionery
A Ni' FRUIT OF ALL KINDS IN SEA
..ttson. Parties and ram i lies supplied with
X c 01.9 rert.M &TAT
by the freezer, or in moulds, with prompt
oess at
GEO. J. SMITH'S
•
,A.dieining the Franklin House, Locust St
P. S. Also a fine :issortment of Toys
find fancy articles constantly on hand.
July
COLUMBIA FLOUR MILLS,
GEORGE BOG-LE, Proprietor.
ITIHE HIGHEST CASH PRICES PAID
I_ for all kinds of Grain.
Superfine and Extra Family Flour for
sale, also mill feed of all kinds. Wheat
ground and packed to order
Town and country custom solicited
July 29th 1565.
NIIPPLEE •St BROTHER,
Manufacturers of
BOILERS_ATE E3-,M
TN addition to our Foundry and Machine
1 work, we are now prepared to manufac
ture every variety of Boiler and plate iron
work,
Mending and Reparing Boilers
:Promptly attended to. Thankful for past
favors, we would invite the attention of
our friends and patrons to this new branch
of our business.
SUPPLEE & BRO.,
jan. 21„135. 2d Street, Columbia,
SUSQ UEBANNA IRON CO
Manufacturers of all sizes of
Refined & Double Refilled
ROUND, SQUARE, FLATS, OVAL,
AND HALF OVAL IRON.
Car Axles, Shafting and Horse Shoe Bars.
.t7t.. Orders promptly filled from Stock
on hand or made to order.
reins, net cash, at Mantifacturer's prices,
delivered an Oars orßoat.
Office at their ROLLING MILL,
ColTimbia,
Sept. 23, 651 y
T)ODGERS &BROTHERS' SUPERIOR
Silver Plated Ware at
• E. SPEREN"G'S
Cheap Jewelry Store
XT EW ST Y - LE OF•WATERFALL Combs
.L 1 at _ ,
aug. 26,
• RA:SPBERRYADE:
!AFT; well known. Summer ,drink; extra
and pure,, by the quart, gallon or
barrel, at ; -J. C. BIJCECER'S,, • •
.CorFrant and I4ocuet Ste..
. -
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Foreign and Domestic Goods,
which we are Prepared to make to order,
in the best manner, and at reasonable
prices.
We have on hand the largest and best
stock of Ready-Made Boys'Cloihing in the
City. Particular attention paid to the
making of Boys' Clothing to order.
111
Gentlemen, Youths, and Boys,
Wishing Clothing made to order, by send
ing their measure, as per diagram, will
hove their orders promptly attended to.
SATISFACTION AND A GOOD FIT GUARATEED.
Samples sent to any part of the U. S.
ROCKHILL Lt, WILSON,
Stonc Clothing Hall 603 . and 605
Clzestnut ,S7reet,
nov 24 3m66] PHILADELPHIA.
ATTENTION HOUSEKEEPERS.
W andEai rettlehisilio,ro
s,tdua,iZes such a
in receiptof new
Sugars,, Meat,
Teas, Fish,
Coffee, Cheese,
Spices. 4, Flour,
Fruits, &-e. •
Provisions of tip kinels,, , tagether with
Woutl c.'AccirtfcSTL:a
ware. . _
German fruits, (CT;
Fresh Peaches, and all the fancy grocer
ies pertainining to a well regulated gro
cery store. I am determined n3t to be sur
passed in cheapness and in the excellent
quality of my goods,
Call around and inspect our stock
whether you buy or not. A share of pub
lic patronage is solicited.
GEORGE TILLE, Agent,
Locust street, above 2d.
illy 7 '6l; tf.
NEW GROCERY STORE.
Subscriber would respectfully in
form the Public generally, that he has
just received a general assortment of
Sugar cured Iran .
No. 1. and Mess Mackerel.
• Extra Fine Syrups.
Relined sugars of all kinds.
Old Rio and Java coffee.
English and American Pickles.
DRIED AND CAN2 , TED FRUITS.
Raisins, Prunes and Prepared Mustard
always on hand and of the very best
grades.
Our stock of staple and fancy groceries
is fall and complete and we intend keep
ing it fresh, by almost daily additions,
Notions of different kinds always on
hand.
THE rENNSYRINII Rini ROO COMPLINV
Are now prepared to receive or forward
Freight, between Columbia and Lancaster,
and all stations on the Pennsylvania Rail
Road and its branches.
Rates Between Philidelphia and Columbia.
First Class. 2nd Class.* 3d Class. 4th Class
25 cents. 21 cents. 1S cents. 15 cents
First Gass. 2nd Class. 3d Class. 4th Class.
23 cts. 20 cts. 17 cts. 14 cts.
. Rates between Columbia and Pittsburg.
First Gass. 2nd. Class. 3rd Class. 4th Class.
71 els. b 6 cts. • 4' cts. 30 cts.
Freight consigned to statwns where the
Company has no Agent, must be prepaid.
All Freights payable on delivery.
H. H. HOUSTON,
General Freight Agent, Phila.
plr-For further information, apply to
S. B. KINGSTON t Freight Agt.,
E. K. BOICE, Freight Agt., Columbia.
A. F. sLAyIsrARE,R, Frt. Agt., Lan'tr.
Columbia, July 14, 1866.
THIS OLD ORIGINAL GALLERY.
The subscriber has completely re-fitted
his establishment, and his gallery cannot
be surpassed by any in the county, and he
hopes by careful personal attention to give
the public better pictures than have here
tofore been produced.
AMBROTYPES, PHOTOGRAPHS,
Ivorytypes, Melainotypes, Carte de Vizite,
and pi”tures on canvass taken in the best
style,, and at prices which cannot be beaten
for cheapness.
-Likenesses warranted, and a satis
factory picture furnished without repeated
sittings. Ho asks a continuance of the
liberal patronage always extended to this
establishment. - Call and examine speci
mens at the rooms, northeast corner of
rout and Locust streets. Entrance on
ocust street. R. J. M. LITTLE.
Oct. 24 1863..
E. SPER. G'S.
Jewelry Store
;" - BAY RI I ,FOR TILE TOILET.' •
ReCommended by all Doctors,' for wash
ing. purposes.. 75 cents per bottle, at
.r . , C. BUCHER:O,
goy-. Front and Locust Sta.
July
~ 036 .jt _
THE
GREAT CLOTHING norsE
PHILADELPHIA.
BARGAINS IN
FINE CL 0 THING!! I
Rockbill at
BROWN STONE CLOTHING HALL,
603 and 605 Chestnut Street,
PIIILADELPHLI.
READY-MADE CLOTHING DEPARTMENT.
The choicest stock of
READY-MADE CLOTHING FOR FALL
• AND-WINTER WEAR.
. .
Ever oaered to purchasers, comprising all
the NEWEST AND MOST APPROVED
STYLES,
Custom Denartment
Our - newly fitted up custom department
for Gentlemen,Youths and Boys,now con
tains a carefully , selected stock. of
Boys' Department
MB
Ept.7l2,t,
-
E
4.-79...e.t. — §, - 2
• v • - tit- - g.td 6
• RE •
• EZ.
fZ 2g
I i
• e•-;
1z
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2
SWITZEF AND LIMBER CHEESE;
ENGLISH AND AmEracAN PICKLES,
C roceries, Provisions,
TEAS AND SPICES.
FREDERICK BUCHER.
corner 4th S. Locust Streets
nao.y 26Lh, ly.
Local Freight Notice
Flour in Car loads, 2S cents per barrel
ctween Philadelphia. and Lancaster.
PHOTOGRAPHS.
COLUMBIA, PENNSYLVANIA, SA.TUR,DAY MORNING, FEBRUARY 23, 1867.
1866;
MALTBY & CASE
LOCUST STREET, BELOW SECOND,
Have now open
A COMPLETE ASSORTMENT
WINTER 00 03D S,
GREAT INDUCEMENTS
TO PURCHASERS.
Is especially invited to their
SPLENDID ASSORTMENT
'i
DRESS GOODS.
LATEST STYLES .A-ND FABRICS,
...,
1111
HO OP SKIRTS,
13RADLEY'S DUPLEX, . '
And other popular -makes at all, prices
BALMORAL SKIRTS,
— VCTI-I — lrl'M Or (7—.) Co .1: :0 S.:
InADIES SII.CIIC CLOTMIS
BLACK CLOTHS & DOESKINS,
FANCY - CASSIMEB,ES,
SATINETTS, JEANS, TWEEDS iSz
VESTINGS
.• - ,
•
IN GE,EA.T . VARIET
° OEITEREIS IIIiIESRIE HODS
Comprising every desirabi make and
style
UNDER-SHIRTS, DRAWERS.
HOSIERY, GLOVES,SCARFS,
COMFORTS, SHIRTS,
COLLARS TIES t.t . c., Ltc.
LADIES,MISSES' and GRILMENS
SHAWLS, BREAK FAST SHAWLS
SONTAGS, CAPS; NUBLAS,
SCARFS, HOSIERY, GLOVES,
MITS &c., &c., &c.
--0—
Boots & Shoes
of all descriptions for
MEN AND BOY'S,
LADIES, MISSES Sz CIIILDREN
READY )lADE CLOTHING
CARPETS, AND OIL CLOTHS,
GROCERIES, ce QUEENSWARE
with a great variety of other
SII.O.SONABLII GOODS
An examination of our Stock is respect
fully solicited—all goods sold at the very
LOW „EST CASH PB.ICES,
Warranted as represented
Oct. 27 66
MERCHANT TAILORING.
Having secured the services of an ex
perienced
Fashionable Tailor
Merchant Tailoring in all its branches will
also be carried on in connection with our
other already large mercantile business.
All orders in that line will be executed
with
PROMPTNESS AND DESPATCH.
Entire satisfaction. both as to Work
manship and Fit guaranteed.
PRICES MODEIIAITE. --
gm, Orders respectfully solicited.
MALTBY & CASE,
Ccolnmbie, Pa.
Oot. 2T, '65. ' ,
"NO ENTERTAINMENT SO CHEAP AS READING, NOR ANY PLEASURE SO LASTING."
AIUTURN. 1866
FALL
and.
offering
ATTENTION
embracing all the
In tho market
TIT_T,S,
MALTBY CASE.
Columbia, Pa.
PA:BuIZY'S
Golden Mortar Drug Store
Is the
HEADQUARTERS
Ring's Ambrosia !
NVA.ItRA.I%.7TED TO
RESTORE GRAY HAIR,
AND
PREVENT ITS FALLING OUT 1
FOR SALE
;I
- .1 ,
'--'- - 1 - - - •' ., , 1 :.- 4 31 , ,:: 7---'''S:.-:., .._.4::.
GOLDEN MORTAR
DRUG STORE,
FRONT STREET,
C.©LLTBIBIA, PA
December S, 1813
REMEMBER THE OLD ESTAB
LISHED STAND.
GREAT BARGAINS AT THE
CHEAP CASH BOOK STORE.
We have just received from the Fall Trade
Sale a selected stock of
BOOKS AND STATIONERY,
Which we now offer at Greatly Reduced
Rates. A large assortment of
SCHOOL MERCHANDISE
Constantly on hand. Also,
STANDARD EDUCATIONAL WORKS.
Brooks' Normal Elementary Arithmetic,
Brooks' Geometry and . Trigonometry,
Rauh's Normal Speller, Sanders' Union
Readers. We call special attention to our
largo assortment of
PHOTOGRAPFI ALBUMS,
FAMILY BIBLES,
AND
DIARIES for 1566
MERCHANTS and TEA HERS
Supplied at Wholesale rates, at
JOHN SHEAFFER'S
Cheap Cash Book Store,
No. 32 North Queen st.. Lancaster,
nov. 18, '65.
PURE WINES &LIQUORS.
THE subscriber calls the attention of his
friends and public, generally to his large
and well assorted stock of pure wines and
liquors at wholesale, only retail for medi
cal purposes and family use.
IMPORTED TUXES& LIQUORS',
such as Cognac of different grades and
brands.
Holland and Cordial Gins.
Port Lisbon, Sherry, Madeira, Malaga.
Champagne, German, Rhino, Clarret,
Wines, &c.
Domestic Wines and Liquors,
Domestic Brandy, Domestic Gin, XXX
Old Rye, XX Old Rye, X Old Rye,Bour
bon and Monogahella, Whiskies, Wines,
Catawba, sweet and tart, Currant, Black
berry, Elderberry, Samburg's Fort, &c.
BITTERS,
• Mishler's Herb, The great Zingari,
Brunen, Stovers, Wine and Cock Tail.
Brown Stout, Scotch Ale, Selters' Water.
Ginger, Blackberiy, Catawba, Cherry,
&c.
J. C. BUCHER, - ,
may 26, '66 cor. Front & Leona.
ZIEMER'S BITTERS. ..
Sold only by . • , '
J. C. BUCHER,
Corner of Front and Locust streets,
Columbia. Pa.
may lt-tf : ,
PARIS P.ANCIZ GOODS I
For Holiday gifts consisting of Fancy
Work Botes Segar Stands, Watch Stands,
Vases. dtc. Fine Cutlery, Pocket Books,
Combs, ac., at N. Sparing's Cheap Jewelry
11114eret
tltl.7'
Reading Rail Road.
WINTER ARRANGEMENT.
December Ist, 1866.
GREAT TRUNK LINE FROM THE
North and North West for Philadelphia,New
York, Reading, Pottsville. Tamaqua, Ashland,
Lebanon, Allentown, Easton, Ephrata, Litiz, Lan
caster, Columbia, de., dc.
Trains leave Harrisburg for New York, as follows:
At 3.03, 8.10 and 9.35 A. 31. and 2.10 and 9.00 P. sr.,
connecting with similar
_Trains on the Pennsylvania
Rail Road, and arriving at Now York at '5.00 and
10.10 A. M., and 4.40, 5.20 and 10.25 P. M. Sleeping
Cars accompanying the - 3.00 A. M., and 0.00 P. M
Trains without change.
Leave Harrisburg for Reading, Pottsville. Tama
qua, Mine' sville, Ashland, Pine Grove, Allentown
and Philadelphia, 8.10 A. M., and 2.10 and 4.10 P. 31.,
stopping at Lebanon and principal - Wsy Stations;
the 4.10 P. M., making connections fbr Philadelphia
and Columbia only. For Pottsville, Schuylkill Ha
ven and Auburn, via Schuylkill and Susquehanna
Rail Road, leave Harrisburg at :3.20 P. M.
- -
Returning: Leave New York at. 9.00 A. M., 12.00
Noon and 500 and 8.00 P. M.; Philadelphia at 8.15
A. M. and 3.30 P. M. Way Passenger Train leaves
Philadelphia at 7.30 A. 91., returning from Reading
at 6.30 P. 31., stopping at all Stations; Pottsville at
8.45 A. M. and 0.45 P. M.; Ashland 6.00 and 11.30 A.
M. and 1..05 P. M.; Tamaqua at 9.45 A. 51., and 1.00
and 8.55 P. M.
Leave Pottsville for Harrisburg, • via Schuylkill
and Susquehanna flail Road at 7.00 A. M.
Reading Accommodation Train: Leaves Reading
pt 6.30 A. M., returning -from Philadelphia at 4.30
P. M.
Columbia Rail Road Trains leave Reading at 7.00
A. M., and 6.15 P. M. for Ephrata, Litiz. Lancaster,
Columbia, &c.
- - - -
On Sundayi: Leave New York at 8.00 P. M.,
Philadelphia 8.00 A.M. and 3.15 P. M., the 8.00 A. M.
Train running only to Reading; Pottsville 8.00 A. DI.;
Harrisburg 9.35 A. M and Rending at 1.20 and 7.30
A. M. for Harrisburg. and 11.22 A. Al. for New York,
and 4.23 P. M. for Philadelphia.
Commutation, Mileage, Season, School and Ex
cursion Tickets, to and from all points, at reduced
Rates.
, Baggage_ checked through; SO pounds allowed
each Passenger.
G. A. NICOLLS,
General Superintendent,
READrxo, PA., January Ist, 1567.
Reading A" Columbia
ON :IND AFTER'
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 26tn, IS6G,
TrainsAvill run between
1-fgam - xLcirteartesx-,
eCcol - intxxx.7-s.za.
-AND
AS FOLLOWS;
Leave Lancaster and Columbia:S.oD a. m.
3.03 p.
Arrive at Readingo.o.2o a.m., and 5.30 p. m.
Returning, leave Reading at 7.30 n: m., and 6.05 p.m.
Arrive at Lancaster 0.20, and Columbia 9.25 a. m.,
and 8.30 p. m.
Through tickets to New York, Philadelphia and
Lancaster sold at principal stations, and Baggage
checked through. Freight carried with the utmost
oromotnoss and dispatch, at the lowest rates.—
Further inform•ttinn with regard to Freight or
passage may be obtained from the agents of the
company.
GEO. F. GAGE,SuDt
E. F. ICEEVER, Gen. Freight and Ticket Agt.
Columbia, Dec. 1, ISO
PENNSYLVANIA. RAIL ROAD.
' 1 • s; 30
Harrisburg Accommodation, 6.3 S P.M.
Trqnsleave West,
Mail train, 11.55 P.M
Hairisburg Accommodation, G. 30 P. M
Lancaster train arrives, S. 10 "
Columbia Accommodgion.
Leave Columbia for Lancaster, 1.40 P.III
Arrive at Lancaster 2.10 "
Connecting with clay express for Phil'a.
Leave Lancaster at 2.45 "
Arrive at Columbia 3.20 "
ram. C. n. ~/1.ELV.7271.2".
Ironic' AND WRIGHTSVILLE R. R
Departure and Arrival of the Passenger
Trains at. York.
DEPARTURES FROM YORK
For BxurtmonE, 4.15 A. M. 7.00 A. M.,
10.40 A. M., 2:50 P. M., and 9.55 P. M.
FOR VirniariTsvna,E, 6.45 A. M., 11.45
A. M., and 3.50 P. M.
For H.utrusnuno, 12.30 A. M. 7.10 A. M.
10,40 A. 51., 11.43 A. M, 2.43 P. M.,and 10.-
30 P. M.
A.11.R1 - VA.LS AT yon.R.
From 13avrimonn,12.25 A. M. 10.35 A. M.
11.3 S A. M., 2.40 P. M.. 6.50 I'• M., and 10.-
25 P. M.
PROM WRIGHTSVILLE, 8.45 A. M., 2.35
P. M . ., and 7.30 P. M.
Prom HARRISBURG, 4.10 A. M., 10.35 A.
51., and 2.45 P. IL, and 0.35 P. M., and 9.-
52 P. M.
On Sunday, the only trains running are
the one from Harrisburg, 10.35 in the morn
ing, proceeding to Baltimore; and those
from Baltimore at 12.25 A. M., and 10.25
P. M., proceeding to Harrisburg.
No train arrives from Baltimore at 10.-
25 on Saturday night; and uouel from
Harrisburg at 4.10 on Monday morning.
I .___ 1-1 1.1 7 S
VEGETABLE SICILIAN
HAIR RENEWER,
Tlio effects of which ore to
RESTORE THE HAIR
EMI
NATURAL COLOR,
AND PROMOTE ITS GROWTH.
It is an entirely new scientific discovery,
combining many of the most powerful and
restorative agents in the vegetable kingdom.
It cures all diseases of the scalp, and
allays all that beat s and irritation, and fur
nishes a nutritive principle by which the
hair is nourished and supported, and by its
remedial virtues, it causes the hair to grow
where it has fallen out, and restores it to
its natural color when gray. The old in
appearance arc made - young again. It will
keep, the hair from falling out.
- It is not a Dye, it strikes at the roots and
fills the glands with new life and coloring
matter. It is the best
HAIR DRESSINGS
Erer used, making it moist, soft and glossy:
It removes dandruff, and all those scurvy
eruptions. It does not contain oil and alco=
holovhich dry up the secretions upon which
the vitality depends.
No person, old or young, should fail to use
it. It is recommendeil and used by the FIRST
MEDICAL AUTHORITY.
Ask for IDLLL'sVuor.T.A.r.r-r, SMILIAN
HAIR liEsuwint, and take no other.
Onir Treatise on the Hair sent free upon
application.
P. WATT, & CO., Proprietors,
SOLD BY ALL DRUGGISTS.
i - 10:s7CENTR &TED LYE. OR SOAP
.7sler i just reeoived, arid for sale at a
ow Ir•M Iry ' R. W7TitikAMS.-
$2,00 PER YEAR IN.APVANCE;, $2,50 IF NOT PAID IN ADVANCE.
7rt - a t V li .
Written for the Sr!
oun HARRY.
==!
He was our first, the blue-eyed darling! .
He gathered first our hearts' fresh dew;
He filled our souls with love o'ertlowing,
Love strong and sweet, and dear as new.
We watehmt with care each infant gesture,
And radiated back each smile;
While from the warm depths of our being
Rich love come forth in floods the while.
Other sweet darlings came to bless us ;
Other soft fingers closed round ours;
Other red lips yearned to caress us,
And others strewed our paths with flowers
But, 0, they were not like our Harry,
The tender bud, the firstborn bloom!
No music cheered us like his prattling—
No smile, like his, could banish gloom.
Gray hairs round Harry's brow are clustering,
And we are near the lonesome grave;
Yet still the love of old is in us,
We bless our God who Harry gave.
To us he is not old—our Harry,
He is our dearest idol still;
He holds within our hearts that chamber
.No other child of ours can fill!
. . . . _ .
urou.
PuLLADA., Feb. 19th, 1,367
MY FRIEND SPY :—" Variety is the
spice of life." I used to write line after
line near the end of my " copy book."
Then I knew not its foice, now I am
wiser. Surely life needs some spice.
Much as we all enjoy life, and loth as
we are to take our departure, yet we
soon tilt of its monotony, and wish for
variety, even should the change leave us
unpleasantly circumstanced, be it but a
change. Thus reasoned the whole house
hold of Mr. Avery Bigge Kaph for some
weeks past. Each one, artificial and
natural, endeavored to devise some meth
od by which we might break the daily
routine of eating, sleeping, talking, and
working, which seemed to confine us
within fixed orbits. Many conferences
were held, and many things suggested,
and the result was, that we must give a
soiree or entertainment in honor of some
distinguished democratic apostle, who
should be invited to be present upon the
occasion. But who should he be? This
quandary was not long a quandary.
Who, but the noblest, the greatest, the
lost standard-bearer of democratic prin
ciples,—General Hiester Clymer. So
we very politely addressed him a very
polite note requesting MS 'presence and
preferences, to all of which he as polite.
-
te ; gt
ton, puts Jne.. : 4
dening exuberance-- thlity.possessed,',us" . ,
upon learnibg his determination; and
condescension, together with a slight
intimation that his " preferences tended
towards the celebrated Teutonic diet and
lager beer."
How variously persons—even white
persons—are affected by the mere pros
pect of future gratification, e. g. Mr.
A. B. Kaph fairly bellowed his triumph,
and threw himself from chair to chair
in the highest state of mental excitement;
Mrs. Dealana Kaph laughed most im
moderately, and clapped her hands no
less than six times in succession; Mr.
O. Dumaza Kaph danced and gamboled
through the room at a furious rate,
revealing a disposition to kick at the
furniture, and swearing that he " must
take a horn ;" Rev. Sanque T. Moneus
groaned, and with clenched hands sang
a long meter doxology; Mr. Green Cabb
Idgehed attempted to transplant himself
by dint of an acrobatic experiment, with
his head in the coalscuttle and feet in
mid air, and in a garbled manner re
peatedly quoted "Teutonic diet;" Miss
Ann Teeke Maydyn took off her spec
tacles, got her hair brush, looked in the I
glass and fainted; while I, to my utter
amazement, when restored to conscious
ness, found myself astride Webster's
Unabridged Dictionary, pictorial edition,
taking notes of the surrounding scene
with a piece of chalk on a boot-jack.
How the Misses and children wore
affected I cannot definitely state, only
this, I ventured an interrogatory of Mrs.
K., who petulantly and vulgarly replied,
that they " acted like calves." Which,
I presume is correct so far as it goes.
But he is coming,—Hiester Clymer is
coming, and I repeat it let him come.
Since then, the whole house has been in
commotion; bustled from "turret to
foundation stones," with the note of pre
paration and the ring of completion.
But even this is wearisome, time
hangs heavily and we are all moodless,
restless and laborious, but like all events,
it too will come and go, and probably
leave us pondering and thoughtful over
the vicissitudes of life.
Were it not better that events and
epochs be simultaneous with the thought
and conception of them, than that poor
mortals should venture upon tho dark
brink of prediction, and there standing
peering into the dim future, for the
realization of exultant hopes?
Times are not what mortals wish them,
Fraught with fortune, health, and Rune ;
But are changeful, strange, uncertain,
Seldom hit by random aim.
• Just here my muse, like an exhausted
wither's " deposeth no further," and
leases me,
Yours, in the felicity of, &c ,
HoonE B. POORE.
NOT. QUITE DEAD.-" Wife, I am to
live but a few hours at most—l shall
soon be in heaven,"
" You! you'll never be any nearer
than you are now, you old brute I You'd
look well stuck up ip heaven—l think I
see you now."
" Dolphus, Dolphus," hoarsely growl
ed the old man,," bring me my cane and
let me lajrup the old trollop once more
before I die."
[WHOLE NUMBER 1,953
Editing a Paper.
The following was found in the office
of an editor by the county sheriff:
Editine , a paper is a very pleasant
business.
If it contains too much political matter,
people won't have it:
If it contains too' little; they won't
have it.
If the type is large; it don't contain
enough of reading matter.
If the type is small, they can't read
If we publish telegraphic reports,
folks say they are nothing but lies:
If we omit them, they say we have no
enterprise, or suppress them for political
effect.
If Ive publish original matter, they
damn us for not giving original seleo•
tions.
If we publish selections, folks say we
are lazy, for not writing more and giving
them what they have not read in some
other paper.
If. we give a man • a complimentary
notice, we are censured for being par
tial.
Thwe do,not, all hands "saywe aro a
greedy hog.
If we remain in the office and attend
to business, folks say we are too proud to
mingle with our fellows.
If we go out, they say we never attend
to business. -
If the local is too long, they have not
time to read it.
If it is too short, there is nothing in it
If it is city local, they knew it before
If it is country local, it is of no use.
The host Beautiful Hand.
I recollect that once there was a dis
pute between three ladies, which had the
most beautiful hand. One sat , tby a.
stream, and dipped her hand into the
water, and held it up; another plucked
strawberries until the ends of her fingers
were pink;, and the third gathered vio
lets until her hands were fragrant. An
old haggard woman passing by, asked,
" Who will give me a gift, for I am
poor.'' All three denied her, but
another who sat near, unwashed in the
stream unstaine w it fr u i t , , Thadorr.r l
with flowers, gave her a little gift and
satisfied the poor woman. And then she
asked them what was the dispute; and
they told her, and lifted. up before her
their beautiful hands. " Beautiful, in-
„ fant ildwers; - but it iS :the , band that
gives to the poor which is the most
beautiful baud.” As she said these
words, her wrintles fled; her staff was
thrown away, and she stood before them
an angel from heaven, with authority to
decide the question in dispute.
Going to Bed.
The following excellent advice which
we take from Hall's Journal of Health
we commend to our readers :
Do it in a hurry, if there is no fire in
the room; and there ought not to be,
unless you are quite an invalid.
But if a person is not in good health,
it is best to undress by a good fire;
warm and dry the feet well; draw on
the stockings again ; jump into bed,
cuddle up with head and ears under
Cover for a minute or more, until you
feel a little warmth; then uncover your
bead • nest, draw off your stockings,
straigltetout, turn over on your right
side, and go to sleep.
If a sense of chilliness comes over you
on getting into bed, it always will do an
injury, and its repetition increases the
ill effect, without having any tendency
to "harden" you. Nature abhors vio
lence. We are never shocked into
health. Hard usage makes no garments
last longer.
A Good Conscience.
There is nothing iu the world con
duceth more t 3 the composureand tran
quility of the mind than the serenity
and• clearness of the conscience; keep
but that safe and untainted, the mind
will enjoy a calm and tranquility in the
midst of all the storms of the world.
And, although the waves beat, and the
sea works, and the winds blow, the mind
that bath a quiet and clear conscience
within, will be as stable and as safe from
perturbation as a rock in the midst of a
tempestuous eca, and will be a Goshen
to and within itself when the rest of the
world without is like an Egypt for
plagues and darkness. 'Whatever thou
dost hazard or lose,
keep the integrity
of thy conscience, both before troubles
come, and under them ;it is a jewel that
will make thee rich in the midst of
poverty, a sun that will give thee light
in the midst of darkness; a fortress that
will keep thee safe in the greatest danger,
and. that is never to be taken from thee
unless thou thyself betray it and deliver
it up.
• A SnowEn OF SALT.—Wo find in the
New Orleans Times of the 4th instant, a
very curious story about a fall of salt.
It is asserted on the authority of a gen
tleman from the Red River, that on the
second of the month a shower of fine salt
occurred on the Red River about sixty
miles from the mouth. There had been
a little snow the day before, and on the
next day, it being observed that the
supposed snow had not melted, it was
examined and found to be veritable salt.
This gentleman gathered a bushel of it,
was found to - be equal to tho best Turk's
UP rose our Devil in a rago, and set
two lines to fill this page.
~ ~ 'ti