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SAMUEL WEIGHT, Editor and Proprietor.
VOLUME XXIX, NUMBER , 13
PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY MORNING
Office in Northern Central Railroad Cern
tn±iny's Building,north-westcorner Front and
Walnut streets.
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er's risk.
Rates of Advertising.
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three weeks, $0 39
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three weeks, t 00
0 each subsequentinsertien, 25
Largeradvertisernents in proportion.
A. liberal discount will be made to quarterly, half
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to their business.
lottry.
The Two Armies.
HT °Lavas %VIaIDILL 110LICIGS
As life's unending column pours,
Two marshalled hosts are seen,—
Two armies on the tr.impled shores
That death flows black between.
One marches to the drum-beat's roll,
The wide-mouthed clarion's bray,
And bears upon a crimson scroll,
"Our glory is to slay?"
One moves in silence by the stream,
With sad, yet watchful eyea,
Calm as the patient planet's gleam
That walks the clJuded skies.
Along its front no sabres shine,
No blood•red pennons wave;
Its bnooer beam the •ingle line,
'•Our duty is to save."
For these no clashing falchion's bright,
No stirring Ind r 3 :
The bloodless stabber calls by night,—
Each answers, "Here am I:"
For those the sculptor's lauiellcd bust,
The builder's marble piles,
The anthems pealing o'er their dust
Through lot g cathedral isles.
For these the blossom-sprinVied turf,
That floods the lonely graves,
When Spring rolls in her sea-green surf
In flowery-foaming waves.
Two paths lead upward from below,
And angels wait above,
Who count each burning life-drop's flow,
Each falling tear of Love.
Though fmm the Hero's bleeding breast
tier pulses 'Freedom drew.
Though the white lilies in her crest
Sprang from that scarlet dew.—
While Valor's haughty champions wait
Till all their scar , are shown.
7.,0ve umehallanued through the gate,
To sit beside the Throne!
gEtEttiDllo.
From household Words
Australian Jim Walker
"Australian Jim Walker," the name by
which he was known, was avowedly an
alias, but Jim always evaded any attempt
to discover his real patronymic, which I have
no doubt ho had wilfully buried in oblivion,
lest he should reflect disgrace on his family.
I know that he never wrote to, or received
letters from them. Ho told me once that he
wished them to think him dead; and I have
reason to believe that on more than one oc
casion be refused to notice advertisements
in colonial papers, calling on him, by his
true name, to communicate with them.
Jim's history—as I gleaned from him one
day, when a trifling act of kindness bad
opened his heart—was a sad but common
one. He was the child of very respectable
parents. The captain of the vessel in which
he came out offered to take him back on
credit; but Jim's pride forbade acceptance
of this kindly offer; ho feared to be taunted
with non-success; "and," said he, "I'd have
died rather than suffer that."
And, indeed, he seemed like enough to
die. A few occasional shillings were picked
up by splitting wood for fuel; but often he
dined with duke Humphrey, and slept in
Nature's ante-room. At last, a settler re
commended him to go up the country, and
ply from station to station in search of em
ployment. He was sure of boarding and
lodging gratis; and at any rate he might as
well perish in the bush as on the banks of
the Torrens. Jim followed this advice. "I
had no swag, not even a blanket to carry,"
said he; "for I had parted with these long
: before. When I started out of Adelaide, a
few pence, a plug of tobacco, an old clay
pipe, a sharp knife, and a clear conscience,
were all my possessions. I sunk my name
forever; I determined to forget it; and I
Aave forgotten it—except at times. The
second day I got a berth at Grey's station,
tinder Mount Lofty; and when lie asked my
name, I said Jim Walker, and Jim Walker
I've been ever since."
The great event in Jim's colonial career
occurred when he was a shepherd on the
Glen Lyon Run, which is situated on the
borders of the Tatiara district. The blacks
inhabiting that locality were justly dreaded
for their untameable ferocity, which civili
zing influences are 4pparently unable to
counteract; to the present day the Tatiara
natives are noted fur their sarage onslaughts
on defenceless Europeans. At the time of
.Tirri's adventure these attack were yet more
numerous and deadly than they are now, so
than the white setttlers rarely ventured
abroad unarmed.
, Jiat was appointed to one of the outsta
tions; and as the country consisted princi
rally of large opens plains, he had a pretty
"toy time of it. The hut was snugly en
sconsed in a nook of the low rocky hills
which formed the northern boundary of the
Run. On these hills grew a few stunted
she-oaks and dwarf honey-suckle trees, in
terspersed with dense scrub, which afforded
no inconsiderable screen from the hot winds.
A single water bole—the summer vestige of
winter torrents—was near at hand, and im
mediately in front of the hut was the nightly
folding ground.
91 50
Jim's only companion in this lonely spot
was Willie, the hut-keeper, the quiet, Scotch '
boy, with whose homely conversation Jim
was fain to be content; save when one of the
overseers rode over from the head station,
or a bullock-driver brought down stones, or
a chance wanderer passed. The latter was,
however, a very rare occurrence; for the lo
cality was much out of the usual track.
One afternoon, as Jim and his trusty dog
Sa.alie followed the sheep homeward, he
was surprised at not perceiving any signs of
Willie. Imagining that the hot weather had
overpowered that usually vigilant personage,
Jim shouted loudly for him to "woke up,"
and help to fold the sheep. Receiving no
answer, he hurried to the hut.
At the entrance he beheld a scene which,
to quote his own expression, "made all the
blood in his body run cold." There was
poor Willie, lying on his face, nearly naked,
and bedabbecl with gore. It was sometime
before Jim could muster courage to approach
his old chum. When he did, ho found that
he was dead, and nearly cold; and a broken
spear in his side betrayed that he had been
murdered by the natives. The hut itself
had evidently been rifled; every particle of
food, the store of flour, sugar, and tea, the
blankets, knives, and every useful moveable,
had been carried off. But what Jim most
regretted was, that the pistol, an old-fash
ioned pepper-box revolver, was missing.—
Fortunately, he had taken his gun in the
morning to shout a few birds, if chance of
fered, during the day; and, therewith, all
the powder and shot remaining on hand.—
Still six extra shots were not to be despised;
and he felt that ti.o loss of the pistol added
to his danger.
Now, all the horrors of his own position
burst upon him. The head station was
fully ten miles distant, and what enemies he
might encounter on the road it was impos
sible to foretell. However, stay in the hut
by himself he could not; so ho resolved to
fuld the flock, and then to set off through
the bush, to give information of the event
and obtain assistance. In pursuance of this
resolution he went out, and with the aid of
the dog succeeded in folding the sheep.
Hoarse with shouting—for your true bush
man can do nothing without making a great
uproar—Jim went to the water-hole to
drink, preparatory to starting on his peril
ous journey. He was just rising from the
recumbent position necessary to enable him
to reach the water, when Sandie gave aloud
growl; and at the same instant, Jim saw
the shadow of a human figure reflected in
the water. Cautiously gazing around, he
beheld several dusky forms moving through
the thick undergrowth of the opposite range.
His first impulso was to fly; but aware of
the necessity of concealing his alarming dis
covery, he mastered his emotion, and order
ing the dog to follow, walked quietly back to
the hut.
[Atlantic litonthiy
Barricading the door as well as circum
stances would permit, Jim sat down on
one of the old stumps which supplied the
place of more convenient seats; and striving
to divert his mind of untimely fear, debated
within himself the propriety of attempting
to elude the wily savages who were in the
,immediate vicinity. But the more he
thought of it, the more impracticable it ap
' peared. To run the gauntlet through an
unknown number of enemies, was certain
death. On the other hand, to remain qui
esent presented only the prospect of pro
longed torture, and final destruction. How
ever, there was no help for it at present,
and unable to form any decisive plan of es
cape, Jim did the very best thing he could;
ho made his little fortress as secure as pos
-1 sible, and awaited the result.
The hut was built in the ordinary bush
fashion, of huge, upright slabs of timber—
the lower ends being in the earth, and the
upper nailed to strong beams. The inter
stices were filled with the fibrous coating of
the stringy-bark-tree, daubed over with clay
to render it wind-proof. The roof consisted
of large sheets of bark, and the only window
was an aperture about a foot square. This,
Jim filled with an old sack, which the na
tives bad probably overlooked. The chim
ney occupied nearly one side of the hut, and
was built of sods ( supported on the interior
by a closely-slabbed wall, to the height of
six feet; the upper portion closing inward
on all sides to the top, was composed of
rough palings, or slips of bush-timber, split
to a moderate thickness.
The interior formed only ono room, about
twelve feet long and ten feet wide, which
sufficed its inmates for all purposes. Night
speedily closed in. and in darkness and in
silence sat Jim with the mangled corpse of
the but-keeper in one of the sleeping berths
wherein he had laid it, and the dog crouch
ing uneasily* his feet. The poor brute
was with difficulty kept from howling aloud.
and once or twice ho ran to the door and
moaned unasily. Ile evidently compre
hended that danger was nigh.
How long Jim remained in this state of
suapense he could never be positive. It
seemed like half a life-time, he said.—
After a weary interval Sandie growled eul•
lenly. and sat erect: hie ears thrown back,
"NO ENTERTAINMENT IS SO CHEAP AS READING, NOR ANY PLEASURE SO LASTING."
COLUMBIA, PENNSYLVANIA, SATURDAY MORNING, JULY 10, 1858.
and his eyes glistening in the darkness like
balls of fire. Listening, attentively, Jim
heard a faint nurse of some one treading on
dry twigs. Then Jim knew that the sav
ages were coming.
Next moment the latch of the door was
cautiously lifted, and a gentle pressure made
against the fastening. 'With a beating
heart, Jim held the dog, and by gestures
forbade him to move or bark. The wonder
ful instinct of the animal enabled him to
comprehend those mute commands, and he
lay down quietly on the floor.
Soon the sack, which Jim had placed in
the aperture, was noiselessly withdrawn,
and a dark visage appeared in its place.—
And now Jim could hardly hold the excited
dog, who would fain have sprung at the in
truder. But the hole was too small to per
mit the entrance of his foes, and feeling
that every grain of powder in his scantily
furnished flask would be required, he even
refrained from firing, and on the withdrawal
of the intrusive head refilled the aperture
with a block of wood.
Whilst so engaged the natives uttered a
yell so unearthly that Jim shook with ter
ror; indeed be afterwards acknowled that he
was near swooning. Almost simultaneously
a rush was made at the crazy old door,
which nearly gave way, and it appeared
certain that another such shuck would
burst it in. To lie still, and worried like a
badger, was not in Jim's nature. With his
sheath-knife he cleared a space between the
slabs sufficiently large to admit the muzzle
of his gun, and in such a position as to com
mand the approaches to the door. By the
clear starlight ho perceived some ten or
twelve naked savages grouped in front.—
Again yelling hideously, they rushed for
ward for another assault. As they came on,
Jim levelled his piece, and fired both bar
rels. In till probability this, saved thedwr,
for two of the assailants fell screeching to
the ground, and the shock was but slight.--
Sufficient damage, however, was inflicted to
break the Limn r hinges, and force the du,,r
from its proper position.
Sandie; more valorous than prudent, sprang
into the breach thus formed, and was thrust
down by his master, just in time to escapee
shower of spears which the enraged blacks
hurled at the opening. The jeopardy from
these weapons was now imminent; but, by a
vigorous effort, Jim pushed the door into an
erect position and resecured it with poles
hastily torn from the rough bunks, or sleep
ing berths, of the hut. Then, re-loading
his gun, he repaired to his impromptu loop
hole.
He had done mischief to his wild enemies.
Their wounded had been carried into the
scrub, and a smaller party came warily out
to reconnoitre. Creeping round the side of
the hut, they came on again, but this time
no yell preceded the assault. Before they
reached the door, Jim, fired in amongstthem,
and again they retreated, howling like wild
beasts.
After this, all was quiet for nearly an
hour, and Jim even began to hope that he
was rid of his persecutors. To make all
sure, however, he closed the little aperture
more securely, shored up the door with
every available piece of timber, and placed an
old dour-barrel in the fire-place, to give due
notice of any attempt at ingress by way of
the chimney.
Insensibly, sleep overpowered him, and
lie was drowsily nodding, when the loud
and angry barking of the dog indicated the
approach of some new peril. Starting up,
Jim listened with that preter-naturally acute
sense of hearing, which nothing but the
consciousness of danger can possibly induce.
The only sound that reached him was the
rustling of the leaves, such as would be pro
duced by the wind sweeping through the
trees. Sandie still barked. Repairing to
the loophole, Jim gazed out for information.
Nothing met his gaze in that direction; but
the rustling wind-like sounds approached
nearer. Feeling uneasy, he cautiously
opened another chink at the rear of the but,
and peered forth.
For a few moments Jim fairly doubted
the evidence of his eyesight. It was as
when Birnam Wood marched towards Don
sinanc. Nut a living soul could ho per
ceive; but a line of great bushes were ad
vancing—apparently of their own accord—
to the hut. Jim scraped the hole a little
larger; and, when the strange procession
came within range, he discharged his gun
at it. Instantly, all the bush es fell prostrate;
and the savages emerged from their leafy
covert. With a shout which blended the
scream of pain and rage with the hoarse
cry of vengeance, the blacks ran forward,
dragging the bushes after them. In aseeond,
the latter were piled against the walls of
the but and a transparent silence followed,
during which the captive was left to specu
late on the object of this manteuvre.
His doubts (if he had any,) were soon re- '
solved, A peculiar crackling sound, suc
ceeded by a broad glare of light, percepti
ble through the crannies of the frail tene
ment, informed him that the terrors of fire
had been brought to bearagainsthim. The
natives had been into the ranges in search
of dry boughs; and with these, mingled
with the inflammable resinous branches of
the gum trees, they now proposed to burn
him out of bis shelter. Bitterly ho regret
ted not having taken advantage of their
short absence to effect his escape. It was
now too late. For a short space he remain
ed in a state of stupefaction—utterly over
whelmed by the increased horrors of his
situation. As the flames caught the dry
combustible wall, and bark roof, he deemed
himself utterly lost; and it was only by a
violent effort that be at length, shook off
the benumbing influence of the intense ter
ror which had seized upon him.
A little reflection convinced him that in
one bold effort lay his sole chance of pre
servation. Reconnoitering the premises, be
observed that the thirties were confined to
the rear and reef of the hut. Through the
chink in the front wail, he perceived the
savages lying in wait near the door, but oc
cupying such a position as to be out of
reach of the fire arms. "They thought to
smoke me out, as they du wombats," said
Jim, "and to spear me as I crawled out of my
den; but I determined to base another trial
for it, and if I died, to die like a man, in
the open air."
Seizing a small bar of tough wood, he
inserted it between the blazing slabs at the
rear, and found that they readily yielded to
his efforts. The dense smoke now filled the
hot, and the burning embers from the roof
fell around hire in showers. But, regardless
of all, save life itself, he stripped off his
blue serge-frock—an article which serves
the bushman for shirt, vest, coat and paletot,
all in one—and carefully wrapped it round
the lock of the gun. Ile then, by a vigor
ous effort, detached two of the slabs from
their upper fastenings, and stealthily drew
them within the hut—the slight noise at
tending this operation being disguised by
the cracking of the burning timber. Gaz
ing through the surrounding belt of fire
and smoke, he discovered that none of his
enemies were in view; all of them—as he
bad anticipated—being collected on the op
posite side of the hut. New was the mo
ment for escape. One danger yet remain.
ed to be obviated. llow to still the furious
barking of the dog he knew slot; yet this
would at once acquaint the savages with
his escape, when instant pursuit and death
would inevitably be the result. It was,
therefore, absolutely necessary to secure
Sandie in the hut. "I could not bear the
thoughts of this," dim used to say, when
relating the incident; :it seemed so cruel to
the p•tor faithful brute." Still, seereeyand
silence were indispensable: the first great
law of nature—self-preservation—crushed
the generous impulses of sentiment; and
the dog was sacrificed to his master'ssafety.
Desirous, however, of affording the animal
at least a chance of escape, Jim tied him
up with a cotton handkerchief only, hi the
hope that his exertions would enable him to
to free himself before the entry of the sava
ges.
This done, Jim took up his gun, and
stepped out through the flames. As he
emerged, one of the natives glided round the
corner; and surprised by the intended vie
tim's unexpected rippcarance, stood for a
moment irresolute. Before he could speak
or move, Jim felled him to the earth with a
blow of his fist, and, without waiting for
the result, darted off, under cover of the
dense smoke, for the ranches.
He had surmounted the first tier, and was
crossing the valley beyond, when the out
cries of the blacks proclaimed that his flight
had been discevered. The hope of yet sav
ing his life lent new wings to his feet; and,
at any rate, he had considerably the start of
his pursuers. Before he had proceeded very
far, something came dashing through the
scrub behind him, and he turned to confront
the expected foe. To his great delight it
was the doog.
0 , 1 NV aTSI sped the two fugitives, the man
and the dog. Ten bush miles lay between
them and safety, and the pursuers were
light of foot and fleet of limb. Jim had
not tasted food since mid-day, he was fa
tigued with toil and watching, and suffered
much pain from the numerous burns on his
arms and shoulders. But hunger, thirst,
weariness and pain were all temporarily
obliterated by the necessity of extreme ex•
ertion, and, as mile after mile was passed
without any evidence of pursuit, hope—
w hich never deserts the brace—grew stronger
in the fugitive's heart.
Although no indications of the natives
were apparent, Jim was too well acquainted
with their nature and habits to relax his
speed, Wily as serpents, and as noiseless,
too, they might be close at hand yet invisi
ble. Onward, therefore, he flew: life was
in front; death near behind. How far, or
during what time, he continued his flight,
Jim could never tell. He believed he was
approaching the bead-station, yet nowhere
could he discern the traces of any human
habitation. At length. fatigued and breath
less, he was compelled to pause. Had the
savages been yelling at his heels, he could
not have proceeded.
lie sought shelter of a rocky mound, near
at hand, and lay down in its dark shadow,
intending to rest for a brief interval only;
but he unwarily sunk into a deep sleep.
From that dangerous slumber, Jim
Walker would probably never have awoke
in this world but for the faithful guardian
,hip of his dog Sandie. Aroused by the
barking of that vigilant companion, he
opened his eyes just as the grey light of
morning was spreading over the horizon.—
Abnve his head the rocky mound rose per
pendicular to a height of about fifteen feet
Over the margin appeared a human head
which caught his startled gaze as heawoke.
Instinctively he recognized the presence of
his pursuers. The savages had tracked Lim
to his hiding-place.
Springing to his rect. he darted forward
with renewed velocity; and as he did so, a
spear whizzed by close to him. Jim felt
that he bad thrown away another chance of
life by halting in the open country. Shel
ter there was none; for the track of flight
now lay over a treeless plain. Again and
again spears glanced by him, and, looking
around he saw that he was pursued by three
savages, one of whom was considerably in
advance of the others. With set teeth and
straining muscles, the hunted man pressed
on, desperation and agony in his soul.—
The savages rapidly gained upon him; and
although a stern chase is always a long
chase, nothing could prevent their closing
with him before many minutes elapsed.
Suddenly he turned and fired upon the
nearest black. The shut was fatal. With
a loud screerh the savage leaped up into
the air, and fell to the earth, mortally
wounded.
Almost immediately there-upon a faint
sound, as of the bleating of sheep, reached
the fugitive's ear. He was near assistance.
He strove to shout aloud, but his soles
failed. A low hill was before him, and in
the valley beyond was the home-station,
could he but reach which his life was safe.
The space between was short. but into that
space were crowded unnumbered hopes and
fears. The savages were fast nearing him.
Once more Being round, he fired, and in the
excitement of the 'moment, missed. It was
his last shot, and now in his speed lay the
last remaining chance of his escape.
He scarcely dared to hope, yet mechani
cally continued to fly. A thousand wander
ing thoughts of happy days, of boyish
sports beneath an English sky, fund re
miniscences of home, and recollections of a
mother's love—a mother too early lo't—
passed with wondrous rapidity before his
mental vision, ho said, hi the brief agonis
ing moments of that fearful struggle for
life.
Tie reached the hill unharmed, and had
accomplished half the ascent, when a spear
entered his shoulder and threw him, stunned
and bleeding, to the ground. The nest mo
ment the savages were upon him.
Sandie, faithful to the last, flew at the
throat of the nearest foe, and forced him
hack to the earth. Frightened at this novel
assailant, the fellow shrieked for help, and,
with a single blow from his tomahawk, his
comrade laid the brute senseless and dis
abled. But the temporary diversion in
Jim's favor, saved Jim's life.
As the savages turned from the dog to
their human victim, bang! bang! come two
shots from the summit of the hill, and
several white men rushed forward to the
rescue. The hunters now became the hun
ted; and I need scarcely add, that neither
of them escaped.
The last shot fired by Jim had fortunately
been heard by a shepherd employed at the
head station. Apprehensive of danger, ho
immediately aroused the other men. Little
time was lost in dressing for the simple
reason that hushmen seldom rozdress; and
starting in the direction of the hill, they
arrived just in time to deliver Jim from the
bands of Isis adversaries.
Tho srear-wound in Jim's shoulder speed
ily healed; and Sandie, although lung de
spaired of, eventually recovered from the
effect of the savage tomahawk. A percep
tible limp always remained to bear witness
of his courageous attack; and surely Jim
was right in saying that Sandic's lame leg
was as honorable to the noble dog as scars
to a soldier. He was little used afterwards
as it sheep-dog; but Jim would not part
with him. He elevated hint to the rank of
a special pensioner, and never ate himself
until he fed the companion of that eventful
night.
I may add, that a party sent over to the
old hut found it burned to the ground and
all the sheep driven off. With the assistance
of neighbering settlers, the greater part of
the flock was ultimately recovered, but not
until many days' hunting for them, nod
several sanguairy encounters with the Ta
tiara blacks, wherein more than one Euro
pean received wounds.
Nr. Eakins, Economy.
The story that we told concerning Mr.
Blifkins Baby is now going through the
papers, and though it was true, very few of
them seem disposed to credit it. We were
delighted with Blifkins, account of his say
ing, by an economical expedient, and give
it in nearly his own words.
"'Mr. Blifkins,' says my wife, 'our kitch
en needs painting.' Does it, my dear?—
Well, then, need it must, for I assure you,
Its. Blifkins, that the accruing dimes do
not warrant the outlay at present.' I saw
that she was unhappy, and knew that she
would not relinquish her point. 'Mr. Blif
kins,' said she a few days thereafter, 'I bare
thought of an expedient by which we can
have our kitchen painted.' Her face was
lighted up with an expression that it too
seldom wears as she spoke. She is a great
woman fur expedients is Mrs. Blifkins.—
.You can do it yourself! continued she,
touching me with the point of her forefinger
in the region of my fourth vest button.
lollar saved,' said she still further, 'is a ,
food as a dollar earned, you know.' I
ooked with admiration on that wonderful
.pecimen of her sex as she said this, and
•allowed' (as the people say) to myself that.
is an economist, she had no peer. And
well I might allow it, for at that eery mo
ment were her shoulders covered by a sort
of monkey jacket made of one of my worn
$1,50 PM YEAR IN ADVANCE; 02,00 IF NOT IN ADVANCE
nut coats, and a pair of galligaskins had as
sumed the form of a basque, and were worn
by a juvenile Blifkine. 'Your suggestion,'
says I to my wife, 'is a good --a. and to
morrow shall develop a new phase in my
character. I will turn artist, and give the
world evidence of a talent that needed but
the Promethean spark of necessity to draw
it out. I will procure pots and brushes, and
Michael Angelo, Raphael, Sa!rater Rosa
and Claude Lorraine shall yield the palm to
Blifkins. Mrs. B. was delighted. 'Mr.
Wilkins,' said my wife in the night, as I
was about settling into my solid nap, 'you'd
better make it pale green.' Do what?' said
I, starting up, forgetting all about the paint
ing. "fhe paint,' replied she. lam afraid
that I used some expression of spleen that
was unworthy of me. I turned over to try
to sleep again. 'Mr. Blifkins,' said my
wife, 'don't you think the window sills would
look better some other color?' Any color
you please, my dear,' said I; 'but let us
dismiss the sut t ject from present discussion
as this is no place for a brush.' I carried
my point as she had her paint, and I was
allowed to sleep. But I was all night
dreaming of my undertaking. No roseate
hues mingled with my sleeping fancies,
fraught with the odors of celestial bowers,
but paint pots were piled in pyramids about
use, brush handles, like boarding pikes, I
encountered everywhere, and a villainous
smell of raw paint almost suffocated me.
"I was up with the lett:, and after break- i
! fast went down to Bristle, the painters to
procure my paint. That eminent professor
of art mixed me two pots of the right arti
cle, of hues that were of a satisfactory shade,
and I went home with anticipations of the
most exalted character. 'Mr. Blifkins,'
said toy wife, 'you have dreadfully daubed
your pants with the paint—strange that you
should be so careless.' Sure enough, on
both sides I had bestowed impartial dona
tions of the adhering color. The pants were
new, and I had congratulated myself on
their being a wonderful fit. This was a dis
couragement. `Mr. Blifkins,' said my wife,
'you'd better put on an old pair.' I have
always boasted of my ability to compete
with anybody in the particular property
known as old clothes. I knew that the de
cayed fashion of many years hung by their
allotted pegs in the closet, which had been
facetiously denominated 'the wardrobe,' and
hastened to procure the garment desired.—
In the name of all the tribes of Israel, where
were the bifurcated teg,uments that for years
had met my view? The pegs were bare, and
my first impression was that they had taken
to their own legs and walked away. 'Mrs.
Blifkins,' said I to my wife, on the top of the
stairs, amid at the top of my lungs, 'where
are the—the—garments?' I heard her say
something about 'sold,' and concluded that
she was trying some little trick upon me, as
wives sometimes will, and 1.1'1% , adopting the
formnla se .noel in vogue, for expree,sing it.
Sho came up stairs. 'Mr. Blifkins,' paid
she, 'I declare I sold all of your old clothes
only yesterday, for a beautiful pair of cases
and souse tin ware.' I looked at her ear
nestly, but the evident calmness that pre
'
railed in her own breast softened and sub
deed the violence in mine. 'You'd better
put on this,' said she, holding up an nrticle
of female apparel, the name of which I dis
remember, but which, when secured to my
sculpt, as I recollect, fell to my feet. She
smiled as she placed it in my hand, and I
put it on. 'Mrs. Blifkins,' said I to my
wife, 'why am I thus accoutred, liable to be
more extravagant than ever?' She said she
didn't know. 'Because,' said I, trium
phantly, 'I am bound to waist!' She pre
tended not to see the reason, and I did not
explain, but went to work. 'Now shall you
see, wife of my soul,' said I, 'such work as
you can find alone in the Vatican at Rome
or the Louvre at Paris, should you feel in
clined to seek it. flere before this door I
take my stand, and here I commence. Yen
shall see." Mr. Blifkins,' said my wife.
'don't drip it over on the floor.' 'Never
fear,' said I, dipping in the brush, and sup
ping it up against the side in the most ap
proved form.
"My first aim was at the upper part of the
door—a paneled door—and I applied the
brush vigoreusly. 'Mrs. Blifkins,' said I
to my wife, 'as the morning is rather cold,
shouldn't you think it well to put on two i
coats?' She took the pleasantry as an un
kind reflection on the disposition made of
the old clothes, earl didn't say anything. I
worked away on that door severely, but I
found before I had half done it a weariness i
in the wrist, and a cold sensation up my
sleeve attracting my attention, revealed the
fact that a stream of paint wits stealing
along the handle of the brush up my arm.
I laid down the implement and went to pro
cure something with which to wipe thepaint
off. 'Mr. Blifkins,' screamed my wife, look
at the baby.' I looked, as she held that
young prodigy up to view, and was much
shocked. The baby had crawled to the
paint pot and had immersed his two hands
to the elbows. Not content with this, he
had laid hands on the brush, and when Mrs.
Blifkins saw him he was engaged in an in
sane effort to get it into his mouth. The
erecocity of that child ie most wounderful!
The paint was washed off, and I commenced
main. 'Mr. Blifkins,' said my wife, when
I had been working about two hours, whim
my hands cramped, my wrist and back ach
ing, my eyes full of paint and my face tat
tooed by the same, like n New Zealander,
'are you most done?' The 'No' that I re
turned I fear was not pleasant. All that
[WHOLE NUMBER, 1,458.
forenoon I worked at that terrible task, and.
at about dinner time I saw it accomplished.
'Mrs. Blifkins,' said I, 'the work is complet
ed; come and look and admire.' She came
at my request, and I noticed a mischievous
twinkle in her eye as she looked. 'Why
Mr. Blifkins,' said my wife, 'you've put
more paint on the paper and the carpetthan
you have anywhere else.' Her criticism
seemed unkind, but I looked where she had
directed, and round the doors and window
frames were rays of paint like the surround
ings of islands on a map, and below were
large blotches of paint upon the carpet that
had assumed geometrical forms enough to
have*puzcled the judgment of a professor.
I confe , s, my dear, that in this particular
I have been a little slovenly; but look at
that work." Mr. Blifkins.' said my wife,
•if there's no better painting in the what's
its-name at lime, I don't care about seeing
it.' L'he door bell here ranc,and,'accoutred
as I was,' without thinking of it, I rushed
to see who had come and met a whole bevy
of ladies, and suffered the mortification of a
sensitive nature under such circumstances.
I here sum up the whole:
.T. I;li flies in acnnunt with Dorncstic Economy.
ISSB. Dr. 'MR. Cr.
To pointing one j Time and labor
room, ,55 00 spcntin paint-
Spoiling carpet, 3 00
inanbing• wall, 500
To Balanco, 50 Mortification, 10 00
$3O 501
"I throw in the dangerous experiment of
the baby and the injury to health, both of
which could they be estimated by numbers.
would swell the amount to en alarming
figure. I came solemnly to the conclusion
that it would have been better to have hired
it done."
Such was Mr. Blif loins' story about Ms
economy. It is a case uotmuch over stated.
The English at Home
The Englishman is never so much "at
home" as in his house. As soon as he hail
completed his day's toil, as he can turn the
key of his desk, his safe, or his manufactory
door, then arises, the vision straightway of
his evening paradise. Then fur home—for
wife and babies—fur dinner. He alights at
his gate about fire o'clock, and goes up
through a lawn green as emerald, over
walks smooth as marble, and through shrub
bery as carefully trained and tended as a
blooded racer for the "Derby day." The
house is of yellow Portland stone, or else of
brick, stuccoed to a cream color. This
makes fine contrast with the green of the
foliage. At the door, John Bull is let in by
the rosiest and most wholesome of servants,
very tidy and "handy," very obliging and
obedient, but it little too obsequious in man
ner. In England, the laboring classes aro
as subservient as a certain class of Ameri
can "help" is saucy and impudent.
What a bright glow breaks upon one in
entering an English home! The wes are
papered with a warm tint; the grate is blaz
ing with a ruddy flame, (no black holes in
the Poor for the air ab infernis;) the carpet
is ankle deep in Wilton softness; the good
genius of hospitality floats in thevery ai13109-
phere. By six o'clock a half dozen friends
have been "set down" at the door, and duly
announced by a white-cravated footman.—
The gentlemen are well dressed; the portly
women are sensibly dressed, which is more
than can be said of a dinner-party in Paris,
or at the file hundred dollar "feeds" of "Sirs.
Potiphar. When, as the guest of the even
ing, you have handed the lady of the house
to the dining-room, you will find that every
thing that is stiff or frigid in John Bull or
his woman-kind is rapidly thawing out.
The dinner is bountiful and genuine.—
Nu tit-bits on threescore dishes, as on the
continent. No half-cooked "experiments"
of new cooks and young housekeepers. It
is a roamt•beef and plum-pudding affair.—
When Mr. Bull wishes to honor a draft on
his hospitality, be dres4e4 his salmon, and
roasts his beef, and toasts his grouse, and
brings out his choicest old Burgundy, which
his grandfather bottled up full fire-and
twenty years ngo. All these good things
ate "punished" through two mortal hours:
and, in despite of Solomon and Neal Dow,
the company ''tarry long stthe wine." Not
so bad, though, are the drinking usages as
in days of yore. The wine-bottle is not
passed so briskly, or pressed upon yon so
pertinaciously, as before the temperance re
form "shied a stone at the decanters." May
I lire to see the day when the last one is
shattered.
A French lady can give a splendid enter
taimn ent on two lemons. But it takes time,
and toil. and terrible "sword exercise" upon
ribs and hindquarters, rounds and sirloins,
before you aro through with an English din
ner. At half-past seven theladieswithdraw
to the parlor, and then comes a short "grace,"
and a long talk over news, trade, or politics.
The Indian mutiny is discussed for the
twentieth time—the suspension of the Bank
charter—the new reform project—the win
ner of the cup at the St. Leger race—the
last serial of Boz—the proposal to grow cot
ton in India—the furor over Spurgeon—the
launch of the unlaunchecl Leviathan. As
an American guest, you will be asked a
score of questions about themes and move
ments on this side of the water A vastdeal
of curiosity is felt in regard to the very
things that you will be least likely toexpect
a cross-queetioning on. The vicar of the
ERE
mg,
Pants spoilt in
ditto,
Paint,
S 00
1 00
$3O 50