■4
®lje American Volunteer.
PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY MORNING
BRATTON Sc KENNEDY.
omrr-.socrn n vnurT sqi.ike
Tkumh;—Two Dollars per year If paid slvlelly
In advance; Two Dollars and Fifty Cents If
within three months; after which Three Dollars
will bo charged. These terms will ho rigidly ad
hered to in every Instance. No subscription dls
i*<mi limed until all arrearnges aro paid, unless at
i ho option of the Editor.
fflartrs.
UNITED STATES CLAIM
and
REAL ESTA TE AGENCY.
WM, B . BUTLER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
'onieoln 2d Story of InhoflTs Dullding, No.3Soul
Hanover Street, Carlisle, Cumberland count;
Ponna.
Pensions, Bounties, Back Pay, Ac., promptly
collected.
Applications by mail, will receive Immediate
attention.
Particular attention gluon to the selling or vent
ing of Ileal Estate, In town or country. In nil let
ters of Inquiry, please enclose postage stamp.
July 11, 1807—tf
T M WEAKLEY, Attorney atLaw.
pj , Ofllco on youth Hanover street. In the room
formerly occupied by A. B. Sharpe. Esq.
TB E. BELTZHOOVER, Attorney
Jn , and Counselor at Law, Carlisle, Pcnna.
unleo on Smith Hanover street, opposite Bento's
Stole. Bj l- special arrangement with the Patent
Otllcc, attends to securing Patent Rights.
Dec. 1, 1803.
CirlAS. E. MAG LAUGHLIN. ATTOR
NEY at Law. Ofllco In Building formerly
/• occupied by Volunteer, a few doors South of Hun
non’s Hotel.
•g Dec. 1, 1805.
1 JOHN. C. GRAHAM, Attorney at
ijg fj Law. Olllco formerly occupied by Judge
' Graham, .South Hanover street, Carlisle, Penna.
Dee. 1, 18(55—1y.
MC. HERMAN, Attorney at Law.
, Olllco In Rheem’s Hall Building, in the
■ rear of the Court House, next door to the "Her
ald” Olllee. Carlisle, Penna.
- Bee. 1, 1805.
\XT F. SADLER, Attorney at Law
YV • Carlisle, Penna. Olllco In Building for
merly occupied by Volunleor, youth Hanove
street.
800. 1, 18(55.
W KENNEDY Attorney at Law,
, Carlisle, Penna. Olllco same as thatol
(he “American Volunteer,” youth side of the Pub
lic Hquaro.
Bee. I 1805.
•4 JOHN LEE, Attorney at Law,
■’s fj North Hanover Street, Carlisle, Pa.,
$ I'eh. 15, 180(5—ly.
JAMES A. DUNBAR, Attorney at
pj Law. Carlisle, Penna. Olllco a lew doors
West of Hannon’s Hotel.
■Dee. 1, 18(55.
DR. J. R. BFXLEH odors his profes
sional services lo tliocltlzuns of Carlisle and
vicinity.
Olllco on ilafn street,, opposite the jail, In the
room lately occupied by L. Todd, Esq.
April 11,1S(!7—ly
DR. GEORGE 8. SEARIGHT, Den
tist. From the Baltimore Volleye of Deiiftij
iS'io'r/ov/. Olllco nt the residence of his mother,
East bouther Htreot, three doors bolow Bedford,
Carlisle, Penna.
Dee. 1, 18(1-3.
3D eg (Sooiis.
1867. * PBIJSUI 18(37.
HAD GAINS
Now opening in
DOMESTIC GOODS,
DRESS GOODS,
CAHSI.MERES, HATTINETTS /INB JEANS,
WHITE GOODS,
DRE 8 8 TR I M M I N G 8 .
Z E P II Y 11 s ,
| UIHBONS AND NOTIONS
V 5 * v L
|KI NG ’ S NEW STORE,
i|
4 ' NO. (3.1 WICST MAIN STItFET,
Opposite the Mansion House,
Next door to the Post Ofllce, Carlisle.
April 18,1807,
OUT DRY GOODS MEN!
TO THE PUBLIC.
I linvo Just returned from Llio East ■with my
•Sprint; stock, uml as usual. 1 um soiling Goods a
mile cheaper than any other Dry Goods House
in town. Ido not think it necessary to occupy a
f tiiluinn of newspaper to endeavor to keep up my
reputation for selling Cheap Goods, nor do 1
wls/j to resort to any other clap-trap to gull the
public. All I ask of them is to call and examine
lor themselves, and 11 not satisfied with the pri
ces, not to buj'. Remember the stand. No. .12
North Hanover street, next door to Dr. Kloller’s,
and Miller & Dowers’ Hardware store.
' WM. A. MILES.’
P. S. I will say nothing about my third and
fourth grand openings.
April 18, ite.
£J2g .HOOP SKIRTS. 028.
NEWS PE IHG STYLES.
“OUR OWN MAKE.”
4‘miimeing every New and Desirable size, style
anil Shape of Plain and Trail Uoop Skirls,—B,
- 1-4, i'y. 2 :l-l, 1) 1-1, 8 1-2.1) 3-1 and 1 yds, round
every length and size Waist; in every respect
,1’ i’hiT tiUAJ.rry, and especially adapted to meet
tlio wants of First Class and most fashionable
irade.
“Our Own Make,” of Hoop Skirts, are lighter,
more elastic, more durable, and really diaper
Uum any oilier make of either .Single or Double
Spring Skirt in the American Market. They are
warranted in every respect, and wherever intro
duced give universal satisfaction. They are now
being extensively Sold bv Retailers, and every
Duly should try them.
Ask lor “Uopklu’s Own Make," and see that
cadi Skirt Is Stamped " W.T UOPKINvS MANU
FACTURER, U2s Arch Street, Philadelphia."—
No others are Genuine A Catalogue containing
btyle, size and Retail Prices, sent to any address.
A Uniform and Liberal Discountullowed to Deal
crs. Orders by mull or otherwise, promptly and
carefully Illled—Wholesale and Retail, at Manu
factory and Sales-roums. •
No. uas ARCH Street. PHILADELPHIA.
Fplcirts made to order, altered aud repaired,
terms, Not Cash. One Price Only
WILLIAM T. HOPKINS.
April 18,1H07—10m.
Q.UEAT
WATCH SALE!
■ •*M'\aTches, Patent Lever Movements,' full
H e: Ucd, Hunting Oases, Sterling Silver. Reautl
'p\. Engraved and in every respect llrst class
■rimers. To bo sold at six dollars each, being less
uuui three-fourths ibo cost of manufacturing.—
i nt'su watches 'are’retailed by Jewelers at Irom
• b, tlie actual cost to the manufacturer being
v. each. Hus stock of watches was purchased at a
utw i mpl yul ° in Loudon, and are now ollerdd at
<w!v£ xl , r .m Uely low figures, that all may possess
uv...... Fuuo-keoper at it merely nominal sum.
V; ulc * u warranted for 2 years. Parties or
pvrill . lum Kont by mall, must enclose 3b cents
writ i postage. Money enclosed In a
wcu sealed letter may no sunt at my risk.
Address ail orders to
x f „ ~ MARLIN CONNOR,
May 10,1807 _i y ’ Alhany.N.V
L .COKKMAN. Du. C. M, WoiITUINaTON.
W D'R U a STORE.
The subscribers have opened a new
drug and chemical store,
No. 7, ’’Nasi Main direct, CXtrlislc,
where they have Just received a largo and fresh
happly oftho very best
DRUGS AND MEDICINES
bo found In the Oily Markets, to which they
ms ito the attention of the public.
Also, a large variety of
PERFUMERY AND FANCY ARTICLES,
Aye Stuffs, and alt the various Patent Medicines.
fIA. Erugn and Medicines warranted pure.
1 inscriptions carefully compounded.
« n COUNMAN * WOItTHINGTON,
April 25, ißOi—tlm .
F 0 E SALE . —A Family Eockaway
[*-, , i l l ria G?< ineavly now.) for sale on roaaoua
ul HotS 8 Bo^flP!? thls offlce - or at U»e Natlon
aiyt’w-u “ aaovo ‘ Btreet '
'' I
BY BRATTON & KENNEDY,
Real IBstate.
estate for sale
/ W. J. SHEARER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
AND AGENT FOR THE SALE OF
Cumberland. Co. Real Estate,
OFFERS THE FOLLOWING VaLUABLI
REAL ESTATE FOR SALE
AT REASONABLE PRICES
IN THE lIOKOUGII OF CAUMHLK.
No. 1. SIX of the llnest BUILDING LOTS In the
Borough, on South Hanover Street,
No. 2. The six most elevated BUILDING LOTS
in, the Burougn, situated at the head ot South St.
IN TITK COUNTRY,
No. 3. A TRACT OF THIRTY-SIX AGUES,
with small but comfortable BRICK DWELLING
. . . • Frame Stable, Ac., and a young and
thriving Orchard or CHOICE FRUIT, situate on
Cio Railroad, in NoiTh Middleton twp., West, and
within a mile of, the Borough of Carlisle. This
properly ns a HOMESTEAD and for general oi
t ruck I-arming, Is t he most desirable tract of its
size, to bo found anywhere in the vicinity of
Carlisle. *
Xho certain extension of the town West
ward, parity consequent upon the Improve
ments made and contemplated by the Railroad
Company In that direction, drawing, ns they
ncoosanrlly will, nourly tlio wholo tnulo of llu
tovyn to that end, will very greatly enhance the
value of this land to the future owner, for any
purpose whatever, rendering It a safe and profit
able Investment.
Feb. IS, 1800.
jFurmturc, &c-
li. EWIHC,
CABINET MAKER
AND UNDERTAKER,
W K S T 31 AIN STREET,
CARLISLE, PENN’A.
A SIT.NI-nrD AS. i -i,VI!TIIi;XT OF '
NEW FURNITURE
for Uio Holidays, comprising •
Kofus, Camp Stools,
Lounges, Centro Tables,
Rocljlng Chairs, Dining Tables,
Easy Chairs, Card Tables,
Reception Chairs, Ottomons,
Bureaus, What-Nots,
Secretaries, &c., Ac.,
Parlor,
Chamber,
Bluing Room.
Kitchen
and Olllco
FURNI T U R E ,
of the Latest Styles.
. COTTAGE FURNITURE IN SETTS,
Splendid New Patterns.
BEDSTEADS AND MATTRESSES,
GILT FRAMES AND PICTURES,
in great variety.
Particular attention given lo Funerals. Orders
from town and country attended to promptly
ind on reasonable terms.
Bee. 18, 18(5(5-tf
QABINE T WARE HOUSE.
TOWN AND COUNTRY.
The subscriber respectfully Informs his friends '
and the public generally, that he still continues
the Undertaking business, and is ready to wait
upon customers either by day or by night. Ready
made Coffins kept constantly on hand, both
plain and ornamental. Ho has constantly on
hand Fisk's Patent Mctudc Burial Case, of which
he has been appointed the solo agent. This case
is recommended as superior to any of the kind,
now In use, it being perfectly air tight.
He lias also furnished himself with a new Rose
wood llkause gentjo horses, with which ho
will attend funerals In town and country, per
sonally, without extra charge.
Among the greatest discoveries of the ago Is
Well's Mjiriitr; Mattrass, the best and. cheapest bed
now In use, the exclusive right of which I have
secured, and will,bo kept constantly on hand.
CABINET MAKING,
in all Ils varlbus brandies, carried on, and Beau
reaus. Secretaries, Work-stands, Parlor Ware,
Upholstered Chairs, Sofas, Pier, Side and Centro
Tables, Billing and Breakfast Tables, Wash
stands of all kmds, French Bedsteads, high and
low posts; Jenny Lind and Cottage Bedsteads.
Chairs of all kinds, Looking Glasses, and all
other articles usually manufactured In this line
of business, kept constantly on hand.
His workmen are men of experience, his ma
terial the best, and Ills work made in tlio latest
city style, and all under ids own supervision. It
will bo warranted aud sold low for cash.
He Invites all to give him a cal I before purchas
ing elsewhere. For the liberal patronage hero
tollro extended to him bo feels Indebted to his
numerous customers, and assures them that ho
efforts will be spared in future to please them In
style and price. Give us a call.
Remember the place, North Hanover street,
nearly opposite the Deposit Bank, Carlisle.
DA'VID HIPE.
Doc. 1. 1805.
JTiter’s
LOOK AND FANCY STORE,
A ND GENERAL NEWS DEPOT,
113 WEST MAIN STREET
CARLISLE, I‘A.
A fine assortment of Goods on hand, such as
Writing Desks,
Port Folios,
Ladies Companions,
Work Rones,
Satchels,
I-iadics’ Purses,
Pocket Rooks,
Segar Cases,
Curd Cases,
Gold Pens,
Pen Knives,
A LARGE SUPPLY OF
FAMILY LIIII.ES
and PHOTOGRAPHIC ALBUMS,
AT REDUCED PRICKS.
• DIARIES FOR 1867.
Subscriptions received for all Magazines. Fash
ion Rooks, Papois, Ac., at publisher pi iocs. You
save postage and always smo of leceivlng your
Magazines by subscribing at PiUEh's.
Special attention is paid to keeping always on
hand a supply of *
SCHOOL BOOKS,
for town and country schools.
Rooks and Music oidcred when desired. _
May 2.1. iuui—if •
______
(LATE POWELL’S) EMBROCATION,
For all Diseases incident (o Horses, Cattle, and the
Hainan Flesh, requiring the use of an external appli
cation.
This now Compound, prepaied by a practical
Chemist having u full knowledge of all the medi
cal virtues of each ingredient iliuteniers Into its
composition, is warranted to exceed anything of
the kind ever yet offered to the public as an ex
ternal application fur the diseases which It is rec
ommended. We uro satisiled that, it will work
Us own road Into tho conlldouco of all who use
It, add those who try it once will neve.* bo with
out it, aud thoretore we roly on experience ns tho
best lest of us usefulness. 'lt is pronounced by
Furriers, and nil who have tried It to be tho best
application over used. This Embrocation has
been put up forever eight yeais, and it is only
through tho Increasing demand aud urgent re
questor my friends and the public that I scud It
forth os tho grand remedial agent for the various
discuses to winch that noble and useful animal,
the horse, is subject.
Many remedies have'been offered to the pub
lic under different forms, some of these are inju
rious, others at best of little use, and many whol
ly improper to answer the puroposes for which
they are locomincnded.
A judicious and leully useful composition, free
from these objections, has the- efov o long been do
'lrad by many gentlemen who have valuable hor
ses, and are unwilling to tiust them to the care of
designing aud pretended Farrlein. Their wishes
arc at length fully g.atilied by Dr. Beale being
prevailed upon to allow this valuable Embroca
tion (which Ims proved so ellicacious to the vari
ous discuses) to be prepaied aud brought out to
tho public.
Tuts Embrocation was extensively used by tho
Government during tho war.
Address all Orders to
Dll. EDMOND BEALE,
• UO2 South Second csti cel, Philadelphia, J'n.
Hi,- For sale at the Drug stores of Gbinmun &.
Worthington, East Main St eet, and D. Ralston,
South Hanover .street, Carlisle.
April 11, lf>G7—Urn
JpHOTOGRAPHS
POE THE 3XI L LION!
1 will .send, post-paid, 50 Photographs of the
most colebraleu Acto.s lor GO <-euts; 60 Actresses
for 60 cents; 50 Union Generals for 50 cents; 50
Ilebel Goneiuls for 60 cents; 50 Statesmen for 60
cents; 50 beuul.llul young Ladies for 50 cents; 50
line-looking young Gentlemen for 50 cents; (1
large Photographs of French Dancing Girls, In
costume,. beautifully colored, exactly as they ap-
E ear, for 50 cents for for 50 cents, Oof the most
eautlful Ladies of the Parisian Ballot Troupe, as
they appear In the play of. the Black Crook, at
Nibio u Garden, New York.
Bend all orders to P. O. Box 177 N Troy, N, Y
May 15,1807 —ly
i^rlknL
“DON’T STAY LONG.*’
A look of yearning tenderness
Beneath her lashes lies,
And hope and lovo unutterable
Are shadowed In her eyes,
As In some deep unrutlled stream
Are clouds and summer skies.
She passed to early womanhood,
From dreary sweet girl life,
And crossed the rosy threshold but
To tlud herself a wife;
Oh I goully should he lead her stops
Along the path of llfel
And as she clasped her small while hands
Upon his arms so strong, .•
How often, like a summer sigh,
Ora sweet pleading song.
She whispered with u parting kiss,
“ Beloved one don’t slay long.”
It’s almost always on her Bps,
Her gentlest parting words,
Sweet us the fragrance from rose loaves
When by soft zephyrs stirred,
And lingering In the memory
Like songs of summer birds.
And in his heart they nestle warn*,
When other scones amid;
Ho stays not till she weary grows,
And her fond eyes are hid,
In tears which lie in bitterness
Beneath each veiling lid.
And oh, luw many hearts arc kept
, By that .ovo uttering sung!
There’s scarcely one who on life’s waves
Is swiftly borne along,
But what has heard from some dear Ups
Those sweat words—"don’tstay long.”
THE PRESS.
From thee, O Press! what bloslugs flow
T’ unworthy mortals hero below I
Life's path to smooth:
The Widow’s cause, the Infant’s tear,
In thee a friend are sure to rear
Their loss to soothe.
Through thco fair Liberty will stand,
The proudest boost throughout the land
Hco Hlst’ry’s page I
The Press enslav’d, she'll Inly moan,
And freedom’s sons In chains may groan,
From ago to ago.
Mimlhmvm.
MRS
An Adventure in Chinese Waters,
Some live years ago I was serviug in
.Her Majesty’s gunboat Havock, station
ed on the coast of China. We had been
sent to Hankow, an important trading
place some six hundred miles island on a
large river, to protect the merchants resi
dent there from incursions of the Celes
tials, who regarded the “ foreign devils,”
as they called ns, with considerable dig-'
favor. No sooner had the* gunboat been
absent for a few days, settling some dls
lurbnnces further down the river, than
the Hankow merchants got into trouble.
It appeared that an army of eighteen
hundred Braves, or Imperial soldiers,
had passed down the river in a licet of
boats, and, finding themselves inconven
iently crowded, had seized and made off
with one of Messrs. Dent and Company's
trading junks. Having been put iu pos
session of these facts, we immediately got
up steam aud went in pursuit. Two
hours’ hard steaming with the swift cur
rent brought us up with them. The fleet
had anchored in the mouth of a creek,
and there, sure enough, was the trading
junk towering above them nil. We came
to an anchor off the mouth of the creek
in such a position that nothing could es
cape us.
Just at this time a very stately-looking
mandarin junk was coming down the
river with great parade, and making for
the entrance of tile creek. A crowd of
men were rowing her very swiftly, and
enormous banners floated from her mast-
head, whilst a profusion of gaudy flags
trailed in the water from the spears that
were thickly .planted around her bow and
stern. The gong that had been clanging
furiously suddenly ceased as our two
boats dashed a'ongside and we boarded
her. After a short scuffle wo were in full
possession of the vessel, almost before the
crew bad .recovered from their first sur-
prise. We now turned tbejunk’s head
round and made the rowers get their Jong
sweeps out and pull her alongside the
Havuuk. Our movements had not been
unnoticed in thocreek. The Braves were
literally howling with rage, trumpets
were brayirg, and the men, stripped for
lighting, were rushing about tor their
arms in the wildest hurry and confusion.
Meanwhile uo time was lost in bringing
ourgu.ia to bear; the ponderous sixty
eight pounder trained slowly round, re
ceived Us eh.;rge, and the Havock show
ed her teeth.
We waited for the first volley, but our
ugly appearance seemed.to damp their
courage very considerably. I have al
ways noticed that the cool, deliberate
way in which our guns are run out aud
loaded has au astonishing influence on
the Celestial mind ; it is so different from
their furious, bombastic way of lighting,
it was,, perhuj)s, just as well for us that
they did cool down, for there would have
been more than eight hundred opposed
to our forty men, whilst we had the ad
ditional inconvenience of having just
captured a larger number of the enemy
than our own ship’s company. Failing
to perceive their advantage, they released
the trading junk and pushed her out into
the stream, aud our boats soon towed her
&c., £c.
alongside.
A boat was then sent in with a gentle
man named Doyle, who acted us interpre
ter for Messrs. Dent and Company, to of-
Jer to exchange the mandarin junk and
crew for the inch who had seized the tra
ding junk. This they ‘refused. As it
was now near sunset we shifted ouy posi
tion farther out into the middle ol the
river, for it would have been most impru
dent to have remained wi'hin pistol shot
of so numerous and skilful an enemy
throughout the darkness of the night.*—
The mandarin’s retainers and crew were
now transferred from their vessel to ours,
and a search was commenced for tli© man
darin himself, whose euphonious name,
Wang, was emblazoned in huge charac
ters on all the banners and everything
else in the vessel. It seemed that this
Wang was the very gentleman that wo
.most wanted, for he was the general iu
command of this division of the army.
All the doors of the cabin were strong
ly barred up from the inside, and for, a
time defied our attempts to enter. 1 —
“Now,” we thought, “ we have‘you, Gen
era! Wang!” as the door burst open, .ml
accompanied by another officer and in
stead of the old mandarin skulking iu a
corner iu a state of abject terror, as we
had expected, we found two of the lovli
cst girls and ugliest old woman that it is
possible to imagine.
The elder .girl stood up boldly, her fine
face white with rage, and her lustrous
black eyes flashing and giving full effect
to the volley of curses that she hissed at
us through her white and firmly clench
ed teeth. tShe wasiudeeda.beautifulglrl,
—such a profusion of glossy black hair,
such firmly pencilled eyebrows, strongly
arched, aud, in her calmer moments, such
a sweet little red mouth. Her figure was
good, her hands, too, were of the small
est, and fingers the most delicately taper
ed, whilst her feet muse have been to a
Chinaman something maddening, shey
were so incredibly small. The dress that
she wore suited her admirably; it was of
a rich dark purple satin, lined with white
fur, aud embroidered round the edge with
gold and bright colors.
Close behind her stood the other girl.—
She was apparently a year or so younger,
and was a faint reflection offter compan
ion. She iu the bud was the promise of
as fair a flower da the other, and was won*
derfully pretty. Her dress was not so
magnificent as her slaters, but was still
exceedingly handsome. She, though in
very great terror, seemed to have unboun
ded confidence in heroldersister, to whom
she clung as though for protection. The
old woman sat muttering in the corner,
and groaned out the direct imprecations
on us and our fathers before us; but of
these, since they amused her without af
fecting us, we* took no notice. She would
have been at any time ugly enough, but
her impotent rage now rendered her doub
ly-hideous. We searched every part, of
the vessel, but wore unabloto find Wang.
It appeared that ho had indeed come
down in the junk, but during the hurry
and confusion of the capture, had man
aged to jump overboard and getaway.
As I liave said, wo were accompanied
by Doyle, and by his aid wo began a con
versation with Mrs. Wang with a view
to pacifying her and the other ladies. At
first she was frantic and would listen to
nothing, but gradually she became more
reasonable.
Hero it Is necessary to digress slightly
to say a little about Doyle, for otherwise
his interpretation of the conversation
would appear eccentric.
Doyle was a man who had been educa
ted for a missionary, baa mastered the
Chinese language solely with that object,
and had commenced his duties in China.
He was a geod fellow on the whole, but a
very peculiar one, and his stories favored
strongly of the Munchausen school. Ev
ery one in China know Doyle and his sto
ries. But the peculiarity with which we
have to deal was somewhat amusing. In
interpreting or relating any conversation,
he invariably represented every one as
prefacing sentences with “Book here,”
and it was droll to hear him invest every
thing with this his idiosyncrasy. As,
for instance, in our conversation with this
lady, which ran thus:
“Now, Doyle, tell her not to bo afraid,
for she shall not bo molested in any way.”
After a deal of talking ho manages to
make her understand this, hut she evi
dently does not believe a word of it, and
so we ask Doyle What she says.
“ O,” he replies, “she says, ‘Look
here; why do yo” come here, you red
haired barbarians? You will not dare to
■touch me, the wife of his Excellency
Wang. There are my handmaidens, take
them if you will, but immediately quit
my centre-chamber. * .
“ And so then,” said Doyle, “ X replied,
‘Look here; we respect your ladysnip’s
most excellent greatness, and we will do
nothing that shall bo unpleasant to you
uor to your Judies.’”
“ Well, Doyle, and then ?”
“Look hero,” he answered, “ She is
still very abusive for this is what she said
to me in reply: ‘Look hero, you white
faced dog, who alone appear to under
stand the flowery language. Kay, what
further insult willyouoiler mo? Tell#ie,
where is my Lord Wang? Have you kill
ed him, or do you reserve him for the
tseen tsCe?’” This signifies “ the thou
sand cuttings,” ti»e mode of executing
State criminals. They are tied to stakes,
and slbwly hacked to pieces; the execu
tioners contriving, with horrible ingenu
ity, to defer the fatal stroke as loug'as
possible.
‘‘And so,” ho continued, “I said to her,
4 Look hero; wc do not fight with pretty
women, and as for Wang, ho has deserted
you and escaped; but you will doubtless
see him before the end of this moon.’ ”
This conversation continued for some
time, much in the samp strain, but occas
ionally interrupted by a prolonged howl
from the old woman in the corner.
111!;111MM
WA N G
Having thus endeavored, with but lit
tle success, to reassure these unhappy la
dies, we returned and attended to our
other prisoners. They were huddled to-,
gether on the quarter-deck, vainly trying
to keep themselves warm, for the night
wind was very cold. At first they were
in a great state of terror, but now seemed
more resigned to the-horrible fate that
they had no doubt was to await them.
Hails were brought to cover them, but
these they vigorously, rejected, thinking
that we meant to smother them. With
groat dilllculty, and to their vast astonish
ment, they wore made to understand that
our only object was to make them com
fortable, ami not to torture them. Treat
ment such as this they had never heard
of captives receiving; still less could they
believe it possible at the hands of the
Western devils, who are naturally con
sidered to bo seven times more malignant
than devils are wont to be. When at last
they did-understand our motives, It was
pleasant to see how gratefully they stowed
themselves away under the sails.
I then sent for a stiff*glass of grog and
offered it to them, telling them that it
was the “ yang shoo,”'the foreign wine.
Until they saw me taste it no one would
touch it, and then one ventured. He was
delighted; his little black eyes twinkled
and opened wide with astonishment,—
The glass was passed round, and they all
said, “ It is good, it is good ; his* Foreign
Excellency's wine is very good.”
About this time a boat was seen ap
proaching through the darkness. The
sentries hailed, and the men in the boat
answered, according to Doyle, “ Look
here; we want to come alongside; we
have something of importance to commu
nicate.” Three or four miserable looking
Chinamen came on board, and this is
Doyle’s account of his conversation with
them.
“Look hero,’ said!; what do you
want?” '
“ And they said, 1 Jjook here; we are
the men who took the foreigners’junk,
and e have come to give our Selves up to
you in order that the general’s vessel may
bo released.”
“ ‘ Look here,’ I replied ‘ j’ou are not
the men. I don’t believe a word you
have said. Why have you endeavored
thus to deceive his Foreign Excellency?”
“* O, great teacher, be not too angry
with us,’ they answered. ‘ For look here;
we are not indeed tl’io men who stole the
junk. We are simply poor rice-planters
who live on yonder bank, and the Braves
came to us and said, Look here; if you
will not go on board that barbarian ship
we will kill you and your wives and chil
dren, and burn your farms and lay waste
your Holds. And so we took counsel to
gether amongst ourselves, and wo said,
Look here; I twill be better for us to trust
ourselves in the hands of the chiefs of the
great English nation, for they can but
take our lives; and if we refuse to go our
wives and children will be murdered too.
Now, therefore, we beseech you. O ovor
to-be-venerated teacher, ask hla Foreign
Excellency not to deal too hardly with
n«”
“ And so I said, ‘ Why, look here; as
you certainly are not the men who took
the junk, you may go. When you get on*
shorogo to the chiefs of the J 3 raves, and say.
to them. Look hero; these foreigners are
wise beyond measure, I heir eyes are as
hawks' eyes, and It is useless to practise
deceits. Bend off no more false messen
gers, for it will avail you nothing.' ”
These poor fellows were overjoyed at
their escape. The Braves could hardly
have been a blessing to them. In about
an hour some more men came with the
’ very same story. They were soon found
out, and allowed to return with a similar
message. Duringthe night a third came,
with a like resuit; this time, however,
the story had been varied a little.
On the following morning a fighting
boat was coming down the river to join
the fleet. It was determined to intercept
her. With this object we weighed anch
or and stood in close to the mouth of the
creek, where wo stopped, aud manned
and armed boats. We remained close
alongside hidden by the gunboat, until
the report of one of the howitzers gave us
the signal to start.. The fighting junk
then being within easy distance, we were
quickly alongside her, and without much
diillculty we made ourselves masters of
the vessel. She was brought alongside,
her crew transferred, and a search of the
vessel was made. We were In luck again,
for there was half a million of copper
cash on board. This, it appeared, was for
the pay of the army.
We then returned to Hankow with our
prizes In tow, and restored the merchants'
junk to her owners; the other two with
the prisoners, wekept for about a week.
Every morning and evening yre visited
the ladles to oak if they wanted anything.
CARLISLE, PA., THURSDAY, AUGUST 1, 1867.
At first.thoy were aa wild na poaaible, and
Mrs., Wang uaed frequently to start up
,atid call out In a commanding tone, * Ho,
there, guards; take away these barbari
ans I” but by degrees they got tamer, and
a circumstance occurred which made us
all great friends. Aftpr this wo used to
supply her with winejHend her Illustrat
ed books, and amuse her with our epau
lettes, gold lace, swords, and everyth inf:
else that we could think of.
The circumstances to which I have al
luded was this. One day the Indies com
plained that they wore very unwell. It
seemed that since their lorcl and master
hud deserted, the servants all refused to
work, and the Indies could got nothing
cooked, and they were consequently in a
very low condition simply from want of
food. This deficiency of course was speed
ily remedied, and then we sot ourselves
to find out all the circumstances of tho
case. The servants evidently thought
that they would extort large sums of
money in this way from tho Indies. They
were mistaken, however. Tho matter
was sUmmarilydisposod of by sending for
therp and explaining to them that in
consequence of their gross misbehavior
we had determined on beheading them
all
It astonished us no little to see their
calm resignation when they received their
sentence. They simply said, “ Well, if
your will, you mast!” or something of
that sort. I never could have believed
their stoicism to bo possible, and should
always have thought* that they doubted
the sincerity of our purpose, had I not
seen their frantic joy when they were
told that they would be allowed another
chance of life, provided they returned to
their duties; they were as though they
had veritably arisen from the dead, and
we had been the authors of the change.—
Suffice it to say that their gratitude knew
no bounds, and there were no more com
plaints.
When it was reported that the men
who were implicated in the junk’s seizure
had been delivered up and punished, the
two Imperial vessels and their oretvs were
released.
Our.men had fraternized very consider
ably with their Celestial brother-sailors,
—so much so, indeed, that on leaving the
ship they wore so drunk that their efforts
to row their vessels to land wore truly ri
diculous.
We parted from the ladies with much
regret, for I, for one, had learned the
truth of the old adage, “Diim capimus
enpitnur.” They took with them many
mementoes of their captivity amongst the
fierce Western barbarians, and with other
tilings, I hope, the lesson that the “ for
eign Devil” is not so black as ho is paint
ed.
fllnrlt Twain and the Mnslio*.
Mark Twain tells the following story
by -a fellow passenger, who, being ban
tered about his timidity, said ho bud
never been scared since be had loaded an
old Queen Anne’s musket for his father
once, whereupon he related the follow
ing:
You see the old man was trying to
learn me to shoot blackbirds and beasts
that tore up the young corn, and such
things, so that I could bo of some use
about the farm, because I wasn’t big
enough to do much. My gun was a little
single-barrel shot gun, and the old man
carried an old Queen Anne’smusketthat
weighed a ton, and made a report like a
thunder-clap, and kicked like a mute.—
The old man wanted me to shoot the old
musket Some time, but I was afraid. One
day, though, I got her down and so I
took her to the hired man and asked him
how to load her, because the old man was
out in the fields. Hiram said :
‘ “ Do you see the marks on the stock—
an X and a V on the Queen’s crown?—
Well, that means 10 balls and o slugs—
that’s her load.”
“But how much powder?” r
“Oh,” he says, “ it don’t matter; put
in three or four handdfull.”
So I loaded her up that way, and it was
an awful charge—X had sense enough to
see that—and started out. X levelled her
on a good many blackbirds, but every
time I went to pull the trigger I shut my
eyes and winked. I was afraid of her
kick. Towards sundown I fetched her
up at the house, and there was the old
man resting on the porch.
“ Been out bunting, have ye?”
“ Yes, sir,” says I.
“ What did you kill ?”
“ Didn’t kill anything —sir didn’t shoot
her off—l was afraid sbe’d kick.”
(I knew blamed well she would.)
“Gimmus that gun!” the old man
says, mad as sin.
And ho took aim at a sapling on the
other side of the road, and I began to
drop back out of danger. And tire next
minute I heard an earthquake, and the
Queen Annie whirling end over end in
the air, and the old man spinning around
on one heel, witji one leg up and both
hands on his jaw, and the nark Hying
from the sapling ; the old man’s shoulder
was set back some inches, and his jaw
turned black and blue, and be had to lay
up for three days. Cholera nor nothing
else can over scare me the way I was
scared that time.
A Model Merchant.
A merchant of New York, during the
late war, made a contract with a mechan
ic to supply him with a quantity of tin
cans. Not long after this the price of
tin rose so much that the contractor must
lose money by completing the work at
tho .price agreed upon. However, he
said nothing, but went on delivering the
cans. When the first bill for part of the
cans was received, the employer, culled
upon him and said :
“I understand you are losing moiujy on
this Job.”
“ Yes,” replied the contractor, “ but I
can sUHid it; a contract is a contract, you
know.”
“ How much will you lose? asked the
gentleman.
“Oh, no matter,” was the reply; “ X
don’t complain and you ought not to.”
“ I insist on knowing.”
“ Well, since you desire it, I shall lose
so much a hundred,” mentioning the
amount.
“Well, .sir," said the noble-hearted
man, “yoii must not lose this, it would
not be right; I shall add the amount to
your bill, and as the price of material may
still rise, I will advance you the money
for the whole of the contract which no
doubt you can now use to advantage.”
The-difFerence thus paid, to which the
contractor laid no. claim, amounted to
five hundred dollars. That was some
thing more than business honesty; it was
Christian principle carried out in busi
ness. The world needs just such exam
ples to convince it of the truth of reli
gion.
Music schools are great institu
tions. Mr. Jiggers, knowjj in public as
Signor Jiggers, got Bpld of. a pupil last
week who was one horse-and a hitch
strap ahead of him. «
4 What is the voice?' asked Jiggers.
1 The compound extract of wind,”
‘What is railslc?’
‘An atmospheric banking institution
which never redeems the notes it issues.'
‘ What are wind instruments ?•’
‘Great blowers.’
4 Name a few of them ?’
‘ Well, bugles, sensation preachers,
trombones, politicians, French horns,
Gothamites, porpoises, Englishmen, clar
ionets and daily papers.’
‘ What are musical bars for?’
‘To make a division of measures.. At
some bars three fingers are counted as u
fair measure for a horn.'.
Jiggers put the new pupil, down for a
sharp, who could B flat under any cir
cumstances.
—lf a man take a tenth or
fifth part from his stock, to the poor, the
remainder will be weightier seed for pro
ducing an increase than If the whole had
been untouched. But this is a delicate
aflalr. To give chiefly with the expecta
tion of the increase, Is traflo, and not
charity.
MEXICO
Oi-uplile Acrmill( or Xlnxlitilllnii-M rxc
(lan—Aflbccliiip Letter to C'nrloltii.
[From the E*pcrnnzo t of Qucvtarn, Jinw i'll.)
The delay of thirty-four days which
kept our people so long* in doubt and
aroused so-much excitement is thus ac
counted for. The firstcoun’er that reach
ed San Louis on the morning of May 19
bearing the news of the capture returned
herp only oft* the 212 d, and the Emperor
was at once notified that lie must appear
before court-martial. Ho protested ih
writing, demanding to bo tried by the as
sembly, of notables who had called nim
to the throne.
The trial was postponed and a message
sent to the President, with the'letter of
protest and the documents that had been
captured. Juarez’s answer was received
on May 30. It was a refusal of the de
mand, grounded on this incontestable
fact, that the assembly of notables had
not been convoked by the head of the re
public; but, the President animated by a
praiseworthy feeling, ottered hissafetvto
the Emperor on condition of the latter
taking an oath never again to tread on
Mexican soil, and of his signing at the
same time his own downfall. Of his
own accord, Maximilian said in a loud
voice that he would accept with pleasure
this double condition, if the officers and
soldiers captured along with him were
also sot free. At that time he was igno
rant of what had become of del Castillo
and Avellano. Even this requirement
was acceded to; but it gave rise to con
ferences and negotiations that could not
fall to be unsuccessful.
Meantime a council of war was held on
the morning of July 11. presided over bv
General Corona, and composed of Gen
erals Escobedo, Martinez, Ruiz and Ne
grete, with two colonels. The three
prisoners were brought before the tribu
nal. Maximilian refused to have any
counsel,; Mejia andJMiramon chose one
for them both. We have not been able
to got any details of that session, which
lasted only about an hour. The pris
oners were found guilty, and their con
demnation, which was sent forward to
San Louis Potosi that very day, was not
returned confirmed until the morning of
July 18. -
It is known that the President was ail
-along inclined to clemency; but our
Minister at Washington, Senor Romero,
•had carried the day ami secured the or
der lor his execution, although full stress
was laid upon the fact of the small ma
jority that had voted in favor of the pris
one’a guilt.
soon as General Corona got posses
sion of the necessary document the three
prisoners were informed of their fate, but
they manifested no surprise. Indeed, by
this time they ITad learned what had be
fallen some of comrades.
THE EAST NIGHT.
Maximilian requested (hat they might
be allowed to remain together to ihe lust.
This was kindly granted. They were
transferred to the old convent., which
had answered as a hospital for the French
troops, ami the principal hall of which—
on the ground floor—was spacious and
comfortable. It was in this room that
the hospital drug shop hud been kept.—
The room has two windows looking out
on the court-yard gardens. At one end
of this* room an alter was prepared. The
sentinels'had orders to Are on any one
who should attempt to enter without
a pass from Captain Gonzales. AAall
events no one was permitted at Aim to
enter but Father Fisher, secretary ami
confessor to Maximilian ; Later, the
Bishop of Quorctaro ottered his services,
which were accepted after a short con
ference between the • prisoners. They
passed most of the night in conversation
and in preparing themselves for death.—
Mirarnon suffered a great deal from his
wound in the eye, which ho kept con
stantly battling with fresh water. Mejia
slept soundly.
At one time Maximilian asked for some
•svriting materials; those were got with
some difficulty, us it was in the middle of
the night. He wrote twole.tters, the first
in German, to the Archduchess Sophia,
his mother; the other to Ins wife. He
gave both lettergto the bishop, requesting
hini to see that they be delivered. lie
gave him also a lock of hair, which the
wife of one of his guards requested per
mission to cut off* herself. Before giving
the lock of hair, ho kissed it, folded it up
carefully, and then slipped it into the en
vlope already sealed for his wife.
About four o’clock Maximilian wished
mass to be said, which was done by life
bishop, after Mejia had been awakened.
All then received conpnnnion together.
After mass the Emperor remained a
longtime kneeling on tire hard stones—
for they had no pn'o d'ufu witli his eyes
towards the ground, and his head resting
on his hand in a pensive attitude. It is
not known for certain whether be was
praying or weeping. Miiamou was paie
and downcast. Mejia seemed to be quite
at ease. We must bear in mind, how-
ever, that he was an Indian,‘and that ho
deemed it a glory to die with his sov-
ereign,
W3AVINU Tit 10 I'KiriOX
When 7 o'clock had struck, the music
of the solemn procession was heard ap
proaching, and Captain Gonzales entered
the chapel with the bandages in his hand
to cover the prisoners’ eyes. Mirarnon
quietly allowed him to cover his eyes,
but Mejia refused, and as the captain was
about to take measures to oveicome his
resistance, the bishop uttered something
to the Indian chief, who at once became
submissive. But the Emperor, advanc
ing, declared that ho would notallow his
eyes to be bandaged. After a few mo-
ments of hesitation Gonzales saluted
Maximilian witli a kind look and placed
himself at the bead of the escort.
The procession at once fell into line.—
A squadron of lancers let! the way, fol
lowed by the band, which played a* dead
march. A battalion of infantry formed
two lines, each four men deep, between
which lines were the prisoners. When
the procession reached the main door of
the convent, Mejia cried out: “Sire, for
the last time show us again the example
of your noble courage; we follow in the
footsteps of your Majesty.” Just at this
moment the Franciscans were passing.—
The first two bore the cross and the holy
water, the remainder bore lighted tapers.
Each of the three coflins was borne by
four Indians, and the three black crosses,
with the prisoners’ seats, were borne
along at the rear. Captain Gonzales at
this point made a sign to Maximilian to
step out into the street. Ho obeyed, ad
vancing very courageously as he said .in
his brokcu-tSpanish , “ Vnuioanosa la ///>-
crtatV* (Let us advance to our fredom.
TIIK EXECUTION'
The procession then wended its way
along the Oalle del Cementerio behind
the church and along the route by the
aqueduct. In a short while it had the
whole plain in full view, and the view
from below was imposing indeed. The
Emperor marched first, with the Abbe
Fischer on his right, and the Bishop on
his left. Behind him came Miramon,
resting on the arms of two Franciscans,
and Mejia supported by the two priests
belonging to the parish of the Santa
Cruz. When they had readied the top
of the height do laCampana, Maximilian
looked fixedly toward the rising sun ;
then drawing from his pocket Ills watch,
touched its spring and produced u mini
turo likeness of the Empress Carlo! ta.—
Ho brought the image toyhis lips, kiss
ed it, and then handing ft,by the chain
to Father Fisehcr, said : “'Carry this sou
venir to Europe for my dear wife; and
should she ever bo able to understand
you, tell her that my eyes were closed
with her likeness, which 1 will bear with
me to heaven !” The point which the
cortege had reached is near the big wall
of the cemetery. Thebellsof thechurch
cs were tolling, and the immediate wit
nesses of the scene were but few, as the
crowd had been kept back by thesoldiery.
The three black crosses aud the pris
oners’ benches were fixed agai nst the wul 1,
and the three firing platoons—composed
of five men each, with two under officers
to each platoon in reserve for the coupe
VOL 54.—N0. 7,
dc r/rarc— advanced to within three paces
'of the condemned. The Emperor, when
lie heard the clicking of the firelocks,
thought they were about to fire, and ap
proaching his two companions embraced
them with touching earnestness. Mira*
mon was so affected that he almost fell
over on his seat, but the Franciscans
stretched his arms out in the attitude of
a cross. Mejia returned the Emperor’s
embrace with great affection and uttered
some broken words that no one could
distinguish, and crossing his arms on bis
breast stood nobly. The bishop, advanc
ing to Maximilian, said Sire, in my
person, bestow upon all Mexico the kiss
of reconciliation. Let your Majesty for
give all at this supreme moment.” The
Emperor, agitated to the utmost, allowed
the good bishop to embrace him amid the
most profound silence. All of a sudden
raising his voice, he cried out, “ Tell Lo
pe/. that I forgive him bis treason. Tell
all Mexico that I forgive her her crime.”
Ho then shook hands with Abbo Fischer,
who could .not utter a word from emo
tion, and who then fell on his knees at
tlie Emperor’s feet and shed copious tears
while he kissed Maximil leu’s hand; many
besides the abbo were shedding tears
also. The Emperor gently withdrew his
hands, and moving forward said with u
sad and apparently aronie smile to the
officer in command of the firing parly,
A la ditijwaicion dc V (At your disposal,
sir.)
When the officer gave the signal for
“aim,” Maximilian uttered something
in Gorman which the report of the mus
kets drowned to the hearers. Miramou
roiled over as if struck with a bolt. Me
jia, who was standing, beat the air with
his hands a few times before be foil, and
a shot In the car finished his pain. The
Emperor fell over on the cross, which
kept him up, and from which he was
picked up alter having been despatched.
The interment took place In the ceme
tery, and the Bishop of Queretaro per
formed the absolution.
AFTEtt TUB EXECUTION
General Corona sent for the Bishop of
Queretaro, and demanded the two letters
which Maximilian had given him. The
one for the Archduchess Sophia was left
un ouchcd, as she is the mother of the
condemned Emperor, and could contain
nothing dangerous. The letter to the
Empress Carlotta, for grave reasons of
Stale that are quite justifiable, was open
ed, and a copy was taken by General Cor
ona’s secretary, ft was written in French.
The fobowlng is a copy:
Mv HkXiOved Caui.otta; If God permit tlmt
yemr health better and you should read these
low lines, you will learn tho cruelly with which
nuo has stricken metduco your do manure for Eu
rope. You look nloiiMT with you not only my
heart hut my Kood fortune. Why did I not give
heed to your voice? So many untoward events I
Alas! so many sudden blows have shattered all
my hopes, so that death Is but a happy deliver
ance—not an agony—to me. I shall die glorious
ly, like a soldier, like aklng vanquished, but not
dishonored. If your sulTerlngs are too great, and
God should call you soon tojoln mo. I shall Dies-.
Ids Divine hand which has weighed so heavily
upon us. Adieu, Adieu* Your poor • Max
Sixteen Tonis or Hydrophobia.
The Detroit Free Frcss % of the 6th insl
gives the following singular account of a
case of hydrophobia; Sixteen years ago
last Wednesday, James Bay, theft a resi
dentof Pontiac, was bitten by a rabid dog,
hut experienced no serious effect from the
bite until one year from tho day on which
he was bitten. Ho then felt some symp
toms of the terrible disease, which soon
developed into a most frightful attack. —
For six weeks he was a raving maniac,
and all hopes of his recovery was aban
doned, but an iron constitution and care
ful nursing brought him out from the
shadow of death, and ho rallied, the dis
ease dually passing off. He pursued the
even tenor* of his way until the second
anniversary, when he was again attack
ed, but with less severity than on the
first occasion. The twenty-sixth day of
June in each year has been the occasion
of a hydrophobic lit, the iaat of which at
tacked him one week ago yesterday, at
Sandwich, where ho was employed as a
hrickmaker. The usual symptoms wore
felt during the early part of the day, and
Bay requested some of his friends to tie
him, in order to prevent personal injury.
Being-frighteml by his peculiar appear
ance. they refused to do so, and ho con
tinued at his work ali day, and until mid
night, his usual time forquitting. Going
to a neighboring barn, he tried to sleep
oll’tlie dreadful attack. Altera while his
companions heard a noise in the barn,
and fearing thafc'it was as Bay had de
clared, went to his aid. An appalling
sight greeted them. The poor victim
was foaming.at tiie mouth, biting at vari
ous objects, and to all appearances suffer
ing the most horrible agony. As soon as
he caught sight of them, with eyes glow
ing like fireball*, and utteringnn unearth
ly yell, he made a rush for them. The
party at once retreated, leaving Bay alone
in the gloomy hayloft wrought up to the !
highest pitch of manical frenzy, and bat
tling with an enemy that no mortal man
can subdue. lu one of his convulsions
Ik* lifted a portion of the roof completely
off, which evidently exhausted him, as
nothing more was heard, and when his
frie ds ilnally ventured to look after
him, he was lound in a sound sleep. He
was at once secured and taken to a safe,
place, where he was kept for several
hours, and he awoke nearty all
traces of the previous night’s awful ex
perlenee had disappeared, and, with the
exception of the exhaustion produced by
ids great sufferings, was as well os usual.
Six Decrees of DrankcuneßH.
s.
The most foolish predicament a man
can get into is to gel drunk. In drunk
enness every man shows his strongest
and most ardent passion. There are six
kinds of drunkards, and if you will go
into a city drinking place where there are
a dozen men under the influence of liq
uor, you will be sure to find those six
different characters, representing differ
ent animals.
The first is hpe-drunk. Ho leaps, and
sings, and yells, and dunces, making all
sorts of grimaces, and cutting up all sorts
of “ monkey shines” to excite the laugh
ter of his fellow's. Terribly silly is the
drunken clown.
. The second is tiger-drunk. He breaks
the bottles, breaks the chairs, breaks the
heads of his fellow carouuers, and is full
of blood a.id thunder. His eyes are flred
with yengeance, and his soul rages with
murderous fury. Of this sort are those
who abuse their families.
The third is hog-drunk. Ho rolls in
the dirt on the floor, slobbers and grunts,
and going into the street makes his bed
in the first ditch or filthy corner hq may
fall into. Ho Is heavy, lumpish and
sleepy, and cries in u grunting way for a
little'more to drink.
The fourth is puppy-drunk. He will
weep for kindness, and whine his love
and hug you in his arms, and kiss you
with his slobbery lips, and proclaim how
much he loves you. You are the best
man he eveV saw, he will lay down his
money or his life for you.
The fifth ia owl drunk. He is wise in
lua own conceit. No man must differ
with him, for his word is law. Heistruo
in politics, and all matter must bo taken
as authority. His arm Is the strongest,
his horse the fastest, his turnips the lar
gest, his town the finest of all in the
land.
The sixth and last animal in the men
agerie is the fox-drunk. He is crafty,
ready to trade horses and cheat if ho can.
Keen to strike a bargain, leering around
with low, cunning, peeping through
eraeks, listening under the eaves, watch
ing for some suspicious thing, sly as a
fox, sneaking as a wolf. Ho is the mean
est drunkard of all.
A very good man, whose life I
have read, so feared Idleness,’and valued
time, that he used to bid hie servant read
to him while ho was engaged Indre&ing
himself.
CSaT* A good word for a bad one is
worth much, and costs Utile.
Hates for
advertisements will DO inserted at Ten Cent#
per lino tor the first Insertion, and five cents
per lin'd tor each subsequent Insertion. quar
terly, half-yearly, and yearly advertisements la
sorted at a liberal reduction on the above rales.
Advertisements should bo by the’
Cash. When sent without any of tune
specified tor publication, they will bo continued
until ordered oat and charged according^.
JOB PRINTING,
Caiu)6. Handbills, CmcuLAßa, and ever* oth*
er description of Job and Oabd Printing excca?
ted hi the neatest style, at low prices.
FAGETUE.
“Mugh remains uusung,” as the cat re
marked when a brick shortened his sere
nade.
The editor who said his mouth never
uttered a lie, probably spoke through his
nose. ,
What kind of essence does a young man
Jiko when ho pops the question? Ac
quiescence.
A Nevada newspaper calls a contempo
rary “ a broken winded, caloric, wang
doodlo newspaper concern.
Excited Frenchman at Niagara Falls.
Eh! dis laze grand spectakle I Supaab I
Magniflque! By gar, he Is come down
first rate.n
Lotus remove temptation from the path
of youth, as the frog said as he plunged
Into the water, when ho saw a boy pick
up a stone.
Here’s the banisters, but where In the
deuce are the stairs—os the drunken fel
low said while groping his way around
the beadstead in the dark.
There is a young lady In this place
whoso lips resemble peach blossoms so
mucn that has to keep a veil over her
face to keep bees out of her mouth,
A Texas editor charges a brother m the
quill with stealing other people’s editori
als, and admonishes him to “render unto
scissors the things that are scissors.
A sleepy deacon who sometimes engag
ed in popular games, hearing the minis
ter use the words “ shuffle off this mortal
started up, rubbed his eyes.and ex
claimed, “ Hold on ! its my deal.”
Sally,” said a green youth, in a ven
erable white hat and gray pants, through
which his legs projected half afoot, “Sally,
before we go into this museum to see the
happy family. I want to ask you some
thin/’ “ Well, Ichabod, what is It?”
“ Well, you see this ere business is gwine
to cost a hull quarter apiece, and I can’t
afford to spends© much for nothin’. Now,
if you’ll say you’ll hev me, darned ef I
1 don't pay the hull on.’t myself!”
Punch illustrates “unbecoming levity”
by presenting a wood cut of a scene in a
church wherein a crowd of spectators are
awaiting the arrival of a wedding party.
To the scene Is appended this dialogue by
way of a glossary :
Fair Young Lady.— 11 1 see some one in
the crowd outside waving a handkerchief.
I suppose the bride Is approaching.”
Light Young
White one? By Jove, perhaps it’s a re
prieve-1”
Several years ago apolitical convention
in a neighboring State nominated aquiet
well-to-do farmer for the office of Lieu
tenant Governor. The nomlneegraoious
ly received the committee*appolnted to
wait upon him at bis residence, and after
expressing his thanks for the honor con
ferred upon him, Informed the commit
tee, that be bad peculiarqualificatlons for
Lieutenant Governor, “for gentlemen”
said he, “that is Just the office I have held
in my house for the past twenty-five
years.’’ He must have been married!
The funny man on the New York Ex
press remorsely perpetrates the following
on the Japanese Jugglers:
When the curtain rises at the Academy
the first thing seen Is a “ Jap-on-kneesl”
The way the Japanese knock their fore
heads on the floor, shows what a brow
beaten people they are.
Manadawgawa Haml-karl Sadekitchl
encourages bis little boy to ascend tall
poles, because he wishes to see his sonny
climb once more.
The reason little All Bight Is so much
at home, when bo gets up to the top of
tho Academy, is because it has an aisy
attio air.
Spoakshave.— Can the “Native hue
of resolution” be imitated with paint?
Would a “ dorg” look well with u
twice-told tale?
When grira-visaged war smoothed his
wrinkled front,” did he iron his shirt
bosom ?
When “church-yards yawn” are they
much sleepy?
*■ as there ever an animal with a
“round unvarnished tale?
Was the “ fruitful river in the eye” ev
er geographically described ?
Was butter ever made from the milk of
human kindness?”
Does “ blow wind come wrack” apply
to the first of May ?
Is the “ tide in the affairs of men” af
fected by the moon ?
Are the “ tender Jeavesof hope”green ?
Cun Woolsey’s character be called
“ heavy” because his “high-biown pride
broke under him?”
Can a man fly with a pair of “ wings os
swift as meditation ?”
If there is “no virtue like necessity
then does it always follow necessity a
virtue?
The Man Who Won’t Pay the
Printer, —May he never be permitted to
kiss a handsome woman.
May he have sore eyes and a chestnut
burr for an eye stone.
May his boots leak, his gun hang fire,
and his Ashing lines break.
May one thousand night mares tread
over his stomach every night.
May every day of his life be more des
potic than the days of Aiges.
May his coffee bo sweetened with flies
and his sauce seasoned with spiders.
May he be shod with lightning, and
compelled to wander over gunpowder.
May the famine stricken ghost of an
editor’s baby haunt his slumbers.
May ho bo bored to death with board
ing school misses* practicing the first les
sons in music, without the privilege of
seeing bis tormentors.
May a troop of printers devils, lean,
lank and hungry, dog his heels eaon day,
and a regiment of cats caterwaul under
his window each night.
May his daughters marry one-eyed ed
itors, and his sons wed female type stick
ers.
The Logic of Early Rising.—'‘‘He
who would thrive must rise at five.” So
says the proverb, though there is more
rhyme than reason in it 5 for If
Ho who would thrive must rise at five,
it must naturally fallow,
He who would thrive more
Must rise at four,
and it will ensue, as a consequence, that
He who would still more thriving bo
Must leave his bed at torn of three:
And who this latter would outdo,
WIU rouse him at the stroke of two,
ami, by the way of climax to it all, it
should be held that,
Ho who woald never be outdone.
Must even rise os soon as ono.
But the best illustration would be,
Ho who would flourish best of all
Must never go to bed at all.
Eclipse op Jupiteb's Moon. —On the
21st of August next a celestial phenome
non will be witnessed, which has only
twice before been recorded In history.—
The planet Jupiter will at that date be
seeu unaccompanied by her satellites for
nearly two hours. Of her four moons
three will be invisible on account of their
passing simultaneously over Jupiter's
also, and thtv fourth wifi be Immersed m
the shadow of the planet.
A backwoodsman saw a lady at a
piano, and sung out, “ Jim jis come here..
Tarnation if here ain’t a woman polling
musio out of a chlsti”
A little wrong done to another Is a
great injury done to ourselves. The se
verest punishment ot an injuiy is the
conclousness of having doneit.
Human nature Is the same all over, the
world, except lu New England, and Urere
it Isaccordlugto circumstances. . - -
Thieves hunt In couples. butalfwhas
no accomplice. * ”
r