American Jdiblttiitici:.
PUBLISHED EyfeßY* THUESDAtMORNINQ
. , 'by' ••
&i ICENNEDY.
}• & ~* m,i ■*"■'» V. I- *
OFFICE-SOUTH 2KABKET SQVABB.
Teuhs Dollars per year if paid strictly..
t ii AdvondeY Tw6i)6tiart and Fifty* Cents if paid
adlhip.threc mouths lafter whlohThree Dollars
tvUl be charged, . These mrmswlllbe rigidly ad--
ucred W
rronUnuedantil ail arrearages' or© paid, unless' at
(Sattiis.
B. BUTLER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW
AND
UNITED ..STATES CLAIM AGENT,
OABLIBLB, dUIUBBBLANI) CO. PA. '
■ pensions, Bounties, Back Pay, Ac., promptly
collected. • y -
Applications by mall will receive. due attention,
and the proper blanks and.lnstrudtions forward
ed. * , .
In all letters of inquiry, please enclose postage
stamp.' 1
March 2K, If
T' M WEAKLEY, Attobnev at LAW.
• I . Offlco on South Hanover street, in the room
formerly occupied by A. B. Sharpe. Esq,
OHAB, 13.; MA6LAUGHLIN, Attob
-Ney at Law, OlDco'ld Building formerly
occuplid by ’Volunteer, a few doors South of Han
non’s Hotel. • *
Deo. 1,1805.
aXI BBLTZHOOYER, Attorney
• at Law and Real Estate Agent, Shepherds;
town, West Virginia. Prompt attention given to
all business in Jeilbrson county and the Counties
adjoining it. • ,
Fob. .15, iOOOr-ly.: . . • - ,
T OHN. C. GBAHASL Attorney at
#1 Law* Office formerly OoCtipled' by Judge
Graham,•SotrttrHanowf otrtsot, Oarimio, r«femcv.
Deo. 1,1805— ly. ,•
EE. BEJiTZHOOVER, 1 Attorney;
■ Ann GotmaEiLOtt at ,La.w,, Carlisle, Penna,
oe on South Hanoyor street. Opposite Bentz’s
Store. By special arrangcruentiWith, the Patent
Office, alteniisto scouring Patent Rights.
Deo* 1,1865,. , i...; .. ■ ,
M. (X HERMAN, Attorney at,Law'.
.. Office Ih Rheem’s Hall . Building,' in • the
rear, of thb Court House, next door to the 11 Her
ald” Office. Carlisle, Penna. ■
Deo. 1,18te:
“TTCTM. J. SHEARER, Attorney &o.
YY at LAW, Carlisle. Pa. Office near Court
House, South side of Publlo Square, in “ Inhofl’s
Corner,” second floor. Entrance. Hanover Street.
Practicing in aU the Courts of this Judicial
District,prompt attention wIU be given tool!
business in thoCountiesofPerryandJuniata,as
well os of Cumberland.
May 21,1860— ly*.
ITT F. SADLEE, Attorney at Law,
VV . Carlisle. Penna, Office In Building for
merly occupied! by Volunteer, South Hanover
street. '
Doe. 1, 1805.
TT T KENNEDY’ Attorney at Law,
YY • Carlisle. Penna. Office some os that ol
the ‘.‘American volunteer,” South side of tho Pub
llo Square.
Deo. 1 1865.
JOHN LEE, Attorney at Law,
• I North Hanover Street, Carlisle, Po., . ,
Fob. 15,1866—ly. ~ •'
TAMES A. DUNBAR. Attorney atj
• I Law. QftrUal©, Penna, Office a few doors
West of Hannoq’fl Hotel.
Dcq. 1,1806. * - -
BR. J. E, BIXLEB offers his’profesn
sional services to tho citizens of Carlisle and
V Office^qn Main street, opposite the Jail, In tho
room lately occupied by L. Todd, Esq.
April 11,1867-ly •• .
S, NEWTON SHOBT. M. D., Phyal
a; oian and Surgeon, Pa.—:
ukfui lor past favors, would most respectful-,
ly inform hlsTfrtends and the public generally,
that he Is still practicing Medicine and Surgery
in all their branches.. Special attention given u>
tho treatment of diseases of the Eye and Ear, and
all other chronic affections. ' . ’' ,'
Office In Wilson’s Building, Main St., up stairs.
Nov. 20,1866; • \ .
EB. GEOBGB S. SEAEIGHT, Den
tist. li'rom the Baltimore' Ctolleoe qf Dentaj
■cry. Office at the residence of nls mother,
East Leather Street, three doors below. Bedford,
Carlisle, Penna. . .
Deo. 1,1865. ... ; •> ■ - . :
aENTISTR Y—Dr. W. B. Shoemaker—
. Practical Dentist, NowviUo, Pennsylvania*
i© in Miller’s Building.’ 1
Feb. 22,1866,— ly - ■
nAVID E. MIL LEB, „
SJB.VEYOB Ailb DBAPTSMAn,
MOUNT BOCK,"OUMBERnAN'D Cd.VFA. -;
April is; iso?—3m».. \
insurance (ffom?dmcs.
gPKUi Aii ’IN ali-KA-N UK AUKN CY I
OVEH' $25,000,000 OL" CAPITA!. REPBBSEHTEO.
Homoi'MotfoiioUtdn, Manhattan, Artie, Boon
rltv. North American, Germania, ail or riow
Yurie,’ Aetna and Phcemx of Hartford, Conn.;
North American'of Philadelphia, Pm armors
Mutual of ifofK, Pa. ; Uoiumuia Mutual of jL.au*
Companies is . - - -
__ - BEOUB I T Y .
If wealth,, experlence. lnteUlgeuce' ond probity.
oxlat.-purpetoXty and nouoruine dealing will jpe.
lndependence.'‘ , i A;‘p e^ oil ’
pays tut his own ,indemnify, and need not, bp^o
whoae*‘pfopectr-WOUld injure or
himseit, bus family, or his neighbors; ' #tA
Insurance effected at .this agency, no.maitei
how large the amount, m either atooff or Mutual-
Companies. Policies issued, losses adjusted and
promptly paid at R HUMRIOHi
. apeciat insurance Agent,
Office inMarlonHollßuiidiug, West Mum Btreel,
Carlisle, or to the following local agents; J.h*
Ferrpo, Nowville; John K. Shuler. New Bloom*
Hold; Perry County, Ba,; or A. li. weidman,
MUlUntowu, Juniata County, Po.
Jam s, isu7rr*hn. - --•“‘"'’‘"'7 "'■‘“t. t“7T~-"T
Mutual life insurance co.
OF Niiivy VOftK. .
CASH ASSETS 115,000,000.
. doubtful premium notea orui r «aulftol
?Z b S^. oC UcUar g "fl«%ChmdcS no in
* threat, and furnisnes insurance at exact cost. __
Twfin tv-four-years ol straight forward, honora
ble dealings has made its name the Byaonyui ol
• strength amoug business.ment and la to-day the
-USADING; IIIFE iIS&ORANOJS ■
inf ♦i.ic, continent. Posseaslng the largeefcossetS,
?LiivS amount mauredA.be largest income
fisISIwsSH
iFsSls^wssssfsKssaS;,
ponies by applying HUMEIICH.'""
‘OfflCe No. ‘Mi West Main Carlisle.
' , Jan, B.lBB7—wn y i ■’. ;
s2oa H^AKD '
PBNNBYL V ANIA
JtOTtJAL HOUSE TinEP DETECTING AND
INBUBANCECOMPAjIY. •
From!uirbO to flvodollars ; .wUI Insure year
to ■ tipeotal Agent,
Office 20 West Main St,, Carlisle. s
jan. 8,1867-6 m • \J
. Insures against all kinds of Accidents.,
CAPITAL.*B94,BO.O.;, ,; U.
; sale at , , . SAMUEL K. HUMRICH’S.
. Office No. 20 West Sti, Carlisle.
■ Janrß, JoO7—om
‘ B Tn J r t flg^-lf Hm ° P ' • iA. BOWING.
OARTFOB1) i/IVE STQCK INBU
- M RANGECOMPANY., ■ ,
■ CAPITAL •;•;• ~■
. Horses insured against Aeaih frotnanj' caußo ' 1
’ < ?ws^VBxen,-Cows and
80^ k N»^««.
March 14, ISW-ly
lit liiwtita Dolnutcer
21==
! J,
M BRATTON & REMEDY.
9£eat lEstatt
Jj> EaL ESTA'TE FOR SALEH
W; J. SHEARER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
AND AGENT FOR THE SALE OP
Cumberland Co. Real Estate,
OFFERS THE FOLLOWING VALUABLE
BEAL ESTATE FOB SALE
AT REASONABLE PRICES
.IN THE BOROUGH OF OAItLISLE.
NO. 3. A Now and Well Built TWO-STOBY
BBIOK HOUSE, with Two-atory Boole BulldlDß,
Containing In all Seven Pleasant Rooms.togothor
with NJBW FRAME STABLE, CARRIAGE
HOUSE and other oat-build legs: situate on East
side Sou th Hanover Street. This Lot, on which
there Is some very Choice Fruit, contains 43 foot
In front by 220feotlu depth. „ ■...' ..
1 No. 4. -SIX of theflnest BUILDING LOTS in. the
Borougt I. on South Hanover Street. - ■
■ No; £ The six most elevated BUILDING DOTS
in the B- orougtt, situated at,the head oi South St.
I . VIS THE CbTOtTRY. ■
! No. 0. , A DO ACHE FARM In North Middleton
townahl n 'Hi mllce from Carlisle. This farm hiw
butaTaiwAirr HouaEnaa stable, but it af
fords tb o finest site for a Mansion House and
Bank Brim thatweknowin Cumberland co.-.j/n •
. No. 7. A TRACT OF THIRTY-SIX ACRES;
With sco tall bat comfortable BRICK DWELLING
HOUSE’, Frame Stable, Aa, and a yoangana
thrivlnu Orchard ot CHOICE FRUIT, situate on
the Rai froiid.in North Middleton twp., West, and
within a mile of, the Borough of Carlisle. This
property as a HOMESTEAD add for general or,
Truck f arming, is the most desirable tract of Its
Size to be found anywhere in the vicinity of
Carlisle'. .
The certain extension of tho town West
ward, partly consequent'upon the Improve
ments .made and contemplated by the Railroad
Company In that direction, drawing, as they
'necessarily will, nearly the whole trade of the
town to that end, will very gfcatly enhance the
.value of this land to the future owner, for. any
purpose whatever, rendering it a safe ond profit
able Investment.
r Feb. 28, 1860. . • - •
urniture, &c
B. E W I N Q,
A.
CABINET -MAKER
AND UNDERTAKER,
WEST MAIN STREET/
CARLISLE, PENN’A,
A SPIiNFDZU ASSORTMENT OF
NEW FUBNIfDEE
for.tlio Holidays, comprising
Camp Stoolsj
Centro Tables,-
Sofas, •,
Lounges,
Rocking Chairs, Dining Tables,
H&sy Chairs, Card Tables,
Reception Chairs, Qttomons,, .
Bureaus, What-Nots.
Secretaries, ... &0., Ac.,
Parlor, '
- ' Chamber, • ’ • •
! , Dining Room,
Kitchen
FUR NIT U R E',
1 of the Latest Styles.
. COTTAGE FURNITURE IN SETTS,
Splendid New Patterns.
BEDSTEADS AND MATTRESSES,
QILT FRAMES ANd'pICTDBES,
’ ■ jn great variety.,
PartiooW Attention given to Funerals. Ordera
'from town i and'country attended to promptly
and on reasonable terms. ■
. Ueo. 48, 1866—tf ;
pABI NET W ARE HOU BE
; TOWN AND - , , -
and the i jublio generally, that ho still continues
•the Und ortaklug business,.and is. rsody to wait
Upuu oil .sujmtrs either by day or by nighf. Beady
•made i jofbikb kept constantly on hand, both
plain and ornamental.'' He has constantly on,
hand* Fish's Patera Metalid Burial - Owe, of which,
ho htb s been appointed the sole agent. This case«
Is rea jmmencled as superior to any of the kina,
now J h uue.lt being perfectly air tight. _
Ho has ateolXnmished himself wlttt anew Rose
wood . T-rpAitHR! and gentle horses, with which ho
will • attend rtmerals In town and country, per
sona lly, without extra > ;J
• An aong the greatest discoveries of tho ogej£
Well ‘i timing Matttass, the best and cheapest bod
now In use, the exclusive right of which I have
been red, and will be kept constantly on hnpd.
CABINET MAKING,
In i ill Its various branches, carried on, and Beau
tea us, Secretaries, Work-stands. Parlor Ware,
XJpl bolstered Chairs, Solhri, Pier, Bide Wntre
Tal )les. Dining and Breakfast lables, Wash
iaS! nds of all kinds: French Bedsteads, high and
low i posts* Jenny idnd-and Bedsteads,
Ch! Kr auXnds,
oth »er articles usually manufactured in this line
‘of business, kept constantly on hand.
i B Cls workmen are men of, experience, his ma
iler lal the best, and his work mode in the latest
icit: y style, and all under, hla own supervision. ■. It
■wiJ U be warranted and sold low for cash.
t fe invites all to give him a call before pnrenas-
Tina’elsewhere,' Porthe liberal patronage here
ito£ ire extended to him he., feels mdebted.tohis
nm nerous customers, and assures them that no
©ff< irts will be spared In future to please them In
!style and price. Give us a cull. . .
B.emember the place, North Hanover street,
neivrly opposite the Deposit B jj) 1 gjp
CABINET MAKING!
>yhß undersigned respectfully, Inform* W{* old
friends and patrons that ho nas resumed tho
business of
CABINET MAKING,
in all Its various branches, at bis old stand. Nos.
66 and 67 South Hanover Street, two doors below
-the Beoond J Presbyterian'-Church, where he is
prepared to manufacture
BUREAUS. • . .
BIDE BOARDS, ...
' SKOBErARIES. ..
bbpakpakt tables,
HAT^CK&*
. WHAT-NOTS, •
,* . * - CENTRE TABLES^
f ■ •» : . saloon tables,
: 1' TKAPOY tables,
WASH STANDS,
BEDSTEADS, .r :■
i BOOKCASES, ■ .
' WARDROBES , Ac. and
CO TTAGEFU RNITU RE,
• 'of every variety,
Looking Glasses,
ofaB, Rocking Chalre,
• and Upholstered . •
. . ; < ; and Cane Ckalrsj
of all kinds kept .constantly on hand.:
CANINGi'REPAIRING AND VARNISHING' '
done on short notice and at reasonable rates.
ns-CouNTkY Produce Taken in.Exohangb.
' • JOHN LISZMAN.
Feb. 14,1807r-8m '•
P OLID AY
AN D
■WEDDING PBESEKTS
£ Fink Lot of
AMERICAN,
GOLD,
SILVER.
WATC HE 8,
-A Splendid Assortment oC
SOLID AND PLATED'SHYER. WARE,
Gold Fern,
Chid Chains,
Vans Betts of
A.B.&N.SHJEBK.
CLOCKS IN OKBAT VARIETY, ■• ■ ;'' ’'
KNIVES ANi> PORKS,
• -L' s'. -• •■■■golD'-rings,;'
■; ■ Ah.i
GOLD' AND BXTiVEB THIMBLES'.
Fortlcolar'ftttQnUon feVvott to repairing.
WATOIIE3, CLOCKS Al^i),
! • ■ ", ■ THO 3. CONLYN^ipK-
Ho, 11 West Mali Bt., opposite MnriooßfcU;
Deo, 20,1806 —6m •
1,.\ ♦
1867.
DOMESTIC GOODS,
DRESS GOODS,
CASSIMEREH, SATTINETTS AND JEANS,
WHITE GO .OBS,
DRESS TRIMMINGS,
RIBBONS AND NOTIONS
RIN G’ S NE W" STORE,
NO. 5B WEST MAIN STREET,
Opposite the Mansion Honso, '
April 18,1507.
OOK OUT DRY GOODS MEN!
I have Just returned from the East with my
Spring Stock, and os usual. I am selling Goods a
little cheaper than any other Dry Goods House
In town. Ido not think it necessary to occupy a
column of newspaper to endeavor to keep np my
reputation for sellihg Cheap Goods, nor. do I
wish to resort to any other clap-trap to gull the
public. All I ask Of them Is to call and nramin«
for themselves, and 11 not satisfied with the pri
ces, jiot to buy. Remember the stand, No. 82
North Hanover street, next door to Dr. Klefler’s,
and Miller & Bowers’ Hardware store.
WM. A. MILES.
P.S. .1 will say-nothing about my third and
fourth grand openings. . /
AprU 18,1807. • • "
QtfO HOOP SKIRTS. 628.
NJjf SPRING STYLES.
“ OUU OWN MAKE.” ,
embracing every New and Desirable size, style
and Shape ot Plain ond 'Jjall Hood Blclrte,—2.
2 B-4,8 1-4,8 1-2,8 8-4,and 4 Yds., jonud
every Tength and size Waist; In every respect
Fitst Quality, and especially ad up te “to ineet
the wonts of, lArst Class and moat fashlonablo
!<T ™Oai Own Make,' 1 of Hoop Skirts, are lighter,
more elastic, more durable, and really chapei
than any other moke of either Single °r Douole
Spring Skirt In the American Market. They or©
warranted In every respect, and lntr
oduced aive universal satisfaction. They are now
being extensively Bold by Retailors, and every
Lady should try them. • .1, , „ ,
Ask tor, “Hopkln’s OwnTOak^' and see that
each Sklrtls Btumped ‘‘W. T HQPKINtSftIANU
FAOTUHEK, 628 Arch Street, PhUadelphlo.
No others are Genuine . A catalogue containing
Style, Size and Retail Prices, sent lo any address.
A Uniform and Liberal Discount allowed to Deal-
Philadelphia.
Bklrts-made toorder.altered ana repaired.
Terms, Net Cosh.
April 18, ISiiT-lOin. ■ .
jj, PO.HLY,-
and Office
RECTIFIER AND WHOLESALE DEALER
IN WINES. AND LIQUORS,
No's. 7 and 9, Nortti Hanover Street, %
Brandies,
Holland Gin,
Lisbon and Muscatel,
Malaga a\ud Claret,
Cherry BratAdy,
-Binokm’rry* Broody,
• Kw ipborry Brandy, .
Lavender Brandy,
Rum Shrub,
CELEBRATED STOMACH BITTERS
Also a largo and superiorstock of _
GROCERIES AND, PROVISIONS,
■ .AT WHOLESALE AND RETAIL,’
April 12, mw-iy
B.COIBOTIA.V. '; ~.. i>% »• M, WOBTinSOTOS.
W DRUG STORE
H he subscribers have opened a now
DiOja AND CHEMICAL,STOBE,
JVo. 7, East Main Street, Carlisle, _ r
-whore uTey have Just received ft large and fresh
supply of tttß very heat
DRUGS AND MEDICINES
th ho found In the Olty Markets, to which they
InvUe the at .tentlon oftho public.
Also, a large variety of
PBnFtrm iery ' and tanov articles,
.Dyf the various Patent Medicines.
Airi>ro^MdMedlolnMw;o¥rnnte4lpMe.
■»^^^s^«sisassigi»k.
'r April 26. 1807- -urn.' :. . r , ■-
AND IMPORTED
p abbxa gebi ■■ • ■ - ,
nrideraiena. i liava now bn hand anil are
a law or all kinds of,
OABBIAGBB., ' '.!■ ! ■-'•
: ■-■ ; ; BOCKA "Wand N°
Bold
' o. *.
w« Tiavft alao a lot<. »*■• second bond worlc wbloh
taTfra^l“ t «c? O X 4 t'y low Iratta.
',- ,;,, v REPAIRING AMD PAXNTtNG
Faneyc Goods, &Q.
T L. STEKK.B®B;iv;. '
i 1 ’■■ , Wnoveb
Op THp JAll<t
'“■ : ;, ''' :u t' l ! l OARLTSLE.'PA. ' V ";;^ (1 ; ;
the st&ia wife now Carrie-'
1 turn
,'BS{fe3PSSffSS3i£ am* «*«p an 4
1 from the Springs.
1 I IM7-ly
J3rg <©bbb»,
SPRING! 18 g 7>
BARGAINS
Now opening In
ZEP.iI'YRS,
Next door to the Post Carlisle.
10 TIIEBUBLIC.
CARLISLE, PA.
Superior Jamaica Spirits, ,
‘ Irish and Scotch Whiskey, ; ,
Monongahcln, Whiskey,
Apple
Pittsburg aud Gommon-Whlskey,
Old Sherry Wine,
Old Madeira Wine,
Port Wine,
"Wlno Bitters,
Tansoy Bitters.
AGENT FOE
PR, STOBVEB’S
CARLISLE, PA;, Tfl
roffital.
«‘YOtT MUST GUESS THE REST.”
(The following Bong, which is tohe sot t* xnaelo.
Is In coarse of publication. Mr. Charles
Bawyor, the author, is already well Known to
fame by his popular songs, and tho present will,
we think, bo quite as great a favorite as Who
will Caro for Mother now?” ‘‘Swinging In the
Lano,” 11 Coming Home,” “When this Cruel. War
Is Over,” and other popular songs, which are fa
miliar to so many fair llps.J
When I was young, tho boys school
Would often try to flirt, (
, And aslc to see me safely horn*,
But found I was too pert. \
. One day a boy Just bljf enough I
To wear a coat and vest, 1
Came up and offered mo his
But you must guess tho rest
• One aftorrioon, I quietly -
Sat reading ’ncath a tree, ■ ,
When this same naughty, saucy thing
*'' '• Again quite bothered me.
Hosawldldnotllkelffliueh, I
And tried with me tojest;
At first I didn’t answer him—
jl But you must guess the rest.
So many happy days sped on,
, And aa wo older grow, '
The folks said “ somo.ono loved mo
Well—l loved “some ono 1 ’ too!
Yet when he over spoke of love,
I called him such ft post,
Then he would look so sad, and High—
But you must guess tho rest. •,
At lost ho grow Quito bold. Indeed,
As .through the lane we strayed,
And .throw his arm around my neck,
While thus to mo ho said:
« will yon bo mlnq? p —'• Oh. dearl” says I,
. * k You really are possessed,”
Ho kissed mo; -then I kissed him back— ‘
But,you must guess tho rest,
(dlisfeEiiiiwiis.
A HINT,
And Mow It Was, Taken.
BY IBAELO.
“Wo can get no good of that boy,”
said my father to my mother, when I
came home one night ns .the eight day
clock that stood in the hall struck twelve.
“ Within the last month or two, he has
had a fashion of remaining out late, and
he given nx n;. excuse that he has Obbu
spending the evening at the Norcott s” .
•• Well,” said ray mother, “is it not
hotter for hi m to be'there than elsew here ?
Poor fellow, ho has little or ho amuse
ment.” , . ~ ~ „
;• Aye,” rejoined my father, there you
go again, siding with him; You will be
the ruin of that boy.”
“Never,” said my mother earnestly,
u ne ver. M
“But what can bring him to the Nor
cott’s” ray father asked.
“ Dove," answered my mother: Ev
ery one hpa It that he and Bella are lov
ers, and I hope to see them married ere I
die ” '
; “Tut, ■ tut, Jane,” said my father,
“ Sammy’s too young to wed.”
“ Just as young as you were when you
wooed and, won me.” ’
This last sentence was a clincher.—
Father said no more, and ere long the
two were fast asleep, and father snoring.
I was delighted at my good luck in
overhearing the conversation, and for
hours I lay on ray bed thinking of the
halcyon days that wore in store for Bella
this morning I awoke from I
mv slumbers, turned on one side, then on
tho other, and anally turned out when
parted friendship. While rubbing the
cobwebs of sleep from my eyes, I set to
without delay and built a castle in the
air' adorning It with all the fabled treas
ures of the Eflsfc, and was aboutln the act
of leading Bella in asaoverign rulerof the
same, when I thought of my centless
purse; and yet, in spite of the present
I state of my finances, I have serious in
tentions of entering the blessed state of
matrimony. Cheer up, Bella, al
low this circumstance to fret you. If 1
luck money X have what wealth cun ne
ver bring to its owner—health, strength,
and a willing heart to labor.
Away down the street is Bella’s resi
dence, and as X peeped out ofmy window,
I could see hers was rais
ed.. She was at that inbment, I have no
doubt, arraying those raven,silken tress
es, which once, and once only, struck a
poetic vein in me. : , ‘
“Mr. Simpkins,” said she one eve
ning; shortly after we were acquainted,
“ will yoii be so kind as to write a piece
for mv album?” , • ’
I answered, “ With pleasure, Miss ”
and as procrastination has been the death
of many a good man, I set to that very
evening to poetize.
I knew I could pilfer from Moore or
Bvron. or oalumntr of aoma old
newspaper or magazine, but I determined
to furnish her with something original,
and so I did, as will be seen by the fol
lowing lines which I now remember,—
“ Oh! ttlve mo a look of thy tresses,
As-blook os tho wings of a crow;
IshftUload them,with oarcssps, .
When thestorray winds blow, blow, blow,
And tho night Is ns black ns ray-hat,
Which on Sundays only I wear,—
Oh I sweetest of five’s sweetest danghtois.
Pray give me a look of your hair.
I wrote, them with a five-dollar, dia
mond-pointed gold peii, on a.gilt-edged,
uink-colored leaf of her handsome, costly
papier maohe album, taking.care to write
my name legibly iu the lower right hand
corner. She told.mo that she highly ap
preciated the verse, that I was a natural
born poet, a genius, o. 0., and that, in
duty bound, I should not hide my talents
under a bushel, but send them to the fur-;
thermore parts of the earth on the .wings
of the press. I was so pleased with her;
appropriation that I classified myself as,
one of the poets; bul l noia know that;
there was some meaning in her hail dup
pressed smile, and in the mischievous,
twinkling, of; her, Jet black; eyes.. Only
fancy, this very day I looked over the
pages of this identical album, but could;
not come across'the airy rhymes. Page
thirty-six was ruthlessly torn out—that s
the word, torn out-by some Vandal.
Now none but poets know what pains
I suffered in bringing forth the lines in
. Question, I .destroyed a quire of pream
lald letter paper, adding, subtracting, and
divldlng—bothered my brain for original
ideas,: or ;nuikiug jingle—lost a
hlghi’a sleep imploring the aid of the
muses: and now, after all tjhla torture ot
body and mind, some other;fellow will be
calling the measured finds, with their
spondees and daotyles, » Jmy,” as if hq‘
wm their father.' All rigtlt:my friend:
voucandosoif you please! At any
am doggedly resolved to let poetry alone.
Old Pefasus la too frisky iir me. But I
got the look of black hair.j ‘ ,
8 ■r left Bella standing before the mirror,
and, doubtless, arrayed In the snow-white
habiliments oif an angle, t wonder it she I
then and there thinks of the yows of con
sSinoY fidelity, and eternal love I have
so often repeated to her,.. Does she draw
forth my photograph Irom its Bleeplng-
Dlaoe, under her pillow, or from its, grayp
fn somO drawer hid away Among muslins
and fine linen ? Does she gaze upon Jt
with admiration, ami conclude) by press
ing it to her.lips, sighing, —
Who can tell me? ,v
• jurat Bella, twice to-day, and had the
pleasure of spending the evening with
Eer Wheii i entered her hoine, I found
’ the old gentleman teadjug a ,newspaper,
Charlotte, Bella’s eider sister,fitting by
•one of.tlie drawing-room windows, and
Bella with her handsome oval face, ex
peotfng me. Chatty was looking anx- ,
fousiy toward the street, which was
thronged'Wit ll mole and female fashion
ables.' She was apparently reptlpss. .
Bv awl by she withdrew, from the win
dow, aa:footsteps were'heard upon the
stone Bteps' leailinß td the front door.
She felt the tlny .white collar that ran
around; her swauny neck, toy?d .for rino
-1 ment with her golden bracelet, shook out
he fSWfI of her magnificent silk dress,
[RSDAY MAY 16,18,67.
nn'd'inoVea out of the room In a graceful
number, returning In a few moments in
company'with ray old friend. Bob Ruf
fles. _ '
Wo were invited to ten, and the supper
was really a fine one. Among the many
good things that were laid before us were
tacts, crossed and reorossed by straight
lines and crooked ones, triangles of eve
ry description, circles; and a host of oth
er mathematical figures; on one I noticed
a bold attempt at copying one of the signs
of the zodiac; cakes, frosted with sugar,
and from whose gaping sides strawberry
lam drippied; preserves, such as apple,
plum and peach, the'fruit appearing like
floating islands in,the midst of sugary
seas. The tea was excellent, milk un
adulterated, biscuits, piping hot from
the’ oven, toast nicely browned, butter of
prime quality, appetite keen ; and the
company all that ould be desired for the
enjoyment of a social meal.
1 may be permitted to add that the cups
were not as smallns thimbles, or thin as
eggshells, but large, full-grown, sevice
aoTe ones, which a follow could take by
handle with confidence, in no danger of
sucking the edges off them, or of making
half-moons of their catch-holds.
After tea, Bella and I walked into the
garden. We wandered down the flower
fringed nvefiue to the shnddy summer
house, As Bella wasarranglng the climb
ifagtoses,! slipped my arm quietly around
her waist, took her hand geutly in mine,
drew her affectionately to my bosom, and
111 less than ten seconds, kissed her. Of
course she'struggled to free herself from .
my,grasp, and to turn herself away flora
m s, but all this teuded to add to the
sveetness of the embrace.
. (The clambering rose-tree was left alone,
we sat down at the rear end of the
shady bower, as comfortable and happy
as a pair of turtle doves. While she wafi
plucking the leaves of a dahlia I whisper
ed lil her ear the story that has been told
every moment from the days of Adam
and‘Eve. * , , , ,
“ Now,dear Sammy,"said she,—sheal
ways calls me Sammy when we are alone,
generally qualifying itwith some amatory
adjective either in the positive or super
lative degree,—“do you fora momentim
agine that papa made love to mamma as
you do to me?" , lt ~ .
“ He did, my love," I replied, “ and his
father to his mother, and so on up to the
time when Eve was sent to comfort Adam
in his ionliness." ~ , i
“ And do you think,’’ she added, “that
they wrote iettuis 1 1 each other such as—
well, such as you have sent mo, o«a
“Not a doubt of it, my dear, and u
would have been aa difficult to prevent
them from using monosyllables, such as
love, dear, duck, puss, pet, kiss, or dissyl
lables, such as angel, deary, sweety, su
gar; cherub, pigeon, and so on, as it would
be to prevent a thirsty cat from entering
the dairy! and tho window open.”
“ And did they meet at church doors, or
in the streets, or at parties?”
“ They did; and they walked to some
solitary place, or sought out some quiet
corner of a ropm, where they squeezed
hands, and one told the other, • I love
you.’ Ask them if what I have stated is
not the truth. ’
She blushed, and said nothing.
•• Bella,-” said I, after a pause, “don’t
you think it is high time for us to give up
courting?” • „ , , ,
“ What do you mean ?” she asked,
while the crimson faded from her cheeks.
“ I mean that we should bethinking of
getting married, and that before long.
“ Well,” said she, with a sigh.
“ Well,” said I, wbat is your answer?”
“ Look In my eyes and read it there.”
I did so; those large black eyes of hers
spoke volumes.
“ Bully tor you, Bella,” said X;
bussl”
... -ajnAwo-busseq.,
“ Now, Sammy, dear,” saicTshe ns she
leaned on my shoulder, “you must go in
and ask the old folks about this matter.—
You know that their consent is needed.”
“ X will go right straight in and ask
“ That’s right, dearest Sammy,’ 1 said
she, “ I knew you would.”
“ Yes; but I am a little scared !”
“ You scared ? You afraid ? Oh I you
are agoosel Do you not think thatwhat
is worth having is worth asking for?”
“ I do,” said I, and away I went, wav
ing my hat In the air, and marched Into
the dining-room, where I had the good
fortune to meet the old gentleman.
“ Quite a pleasant evening,” said he, re-,
moving the spectacles from his nose and
twirling them in his hand.
“ Yes, sir, it Is,” I replied, as I took a :
seat by one of the windows.
I had hardly done so when I heard a'
slight tap at the window pane, and 6n|
turning round saw Bella standing there',
her head shaking up and down, her lips
in active motion, and her lingers pointed
in the direction of Mr. Nocoott.
I became bold and dauntless, and, raove
ing to the centre table, said, — - '
“ Mr. Norco It, I have called in to speak
to you upon business of great importance,
and the only-thing-needed for my success
is your consent.”
“ Whatever I can do for you, Sammy,
i wiii.” , „, ;
“ Thank you, sir,” said I, “ and I hope}
that I will never prove ungrateful for all'
favors I may receive at your hands.”- i
“ I know that, Sammy.”
“ Only a few months ago,” I continued,!
“X was introduced toyour family. Friend-:
ship, deep-rooted aud sincere, has sprung:
up between us.” ~ !
I paused for a moment to wipe away the}
perspiration that oozed from my brow and;
trickled down my cheeks, and again heard:
the slight tapping on the window pane. ■
“ In one instance that friendship has 1
glided into a pure and holy love, nudl nowj
ask yens permission to my marrying Bel-.
)a.” . , , ,
“ Samuel,” said he, grasping my hand.-,
“ I cheerfully grant the same. If X huili
had any objections towards accepting you
as a.son in-law I would have expressed It
long ore this. I only pray that she may l
be as fond, as affectionate, and cureful a
wife as her mother.” , •
Mr£ Norcott then came in, and the old,
gentleman told her all. She did not ap
pear to be in any waj> astonished at
news, and freely gave hei'‘consent. ;• •'
I rushed to the room door, and shouted 1
in, Bella. Father’s all right on!
the goose question. Ho goes in for the
Tlnion.” ; ......
On my coming home v I acquainted the;
old folks with wnafc I hod done, and fchoyi
were delighted at the choice I ha.i made:
Hal there sounds the town clock—one--:
two—throe—four—five-.* six—seven-reign tj
—nine—ten—eleven—twelve! Midnight,
by Jovel . ; .
Hush! who the deuce can this be,
knocking at my door? Come in. Hoi ho
His Morpheus. , Good night, ray friend
and pleasant dreains; Now Modrheus,
old boy, queltes nouvellca.
THOMAS' H. : Benton was traveling
through one of the border counties of
Missouri, when hearing that court was
In session at acertainjiolnfc, he concluded
to pass that way and give it a call. Pass
ing through forest and brier, he was di
rected to a “ clearing," where a rough
-frame of a house, without roof, might be
seen, surrounded by stumps of trees and
supported by splices of sapling. The
"Judge" was seated on a log, without
his coat. Presently the sheriff made his
UP^Mr; n Sherlff,”' said the Judge, “ have
7 Th S e° shedi, Ü bfowing and sweating ro-
Pl, ' e Got nine of ’em, yodr honor, out here
in the thicket, tied with hlokory withes."
■ “Theh—lyou havel” roared the judge.
“ Where Is tlto other three?” • ‘ _
“ Ez for them," answered the sheriff,
“ I’ve done, all I could do—set two dogs
and three niggers on , their trail, an’l
reok’n they’ll fetch ’em by-’n-by."
“ Isaac, my son, let the Good Book be
a lamp unto, thy path,” " Mother. re
plied the. thoughtful Isaac “ I should
think that was making light of sacred
things."
IUNMEHEST OP SWEEP, /w"*
■ft
The chamber In which wo sleep, should
be always large nud airy. In 'modern
houses, these requisites are tpo much
overlooked; and, while the public rooms
are of great dimensions, those appropria
ted for sleeping are little better than clos
ets. Thisorrorlsexceedlngly detrimental
to health. The apartments wherein so
great a portion of life Is passed, should
always be roomy, and, If possible, not
placed upon- the ground floor, because
such a situation is more apt to bo damp
and 111-ventilated than higher up.
* The next consideration Applies to the
bed Itself, which ought to be large, and
not placed close to the wall, but at some
distance front it, both to avoid any damp
, ness which may exist In the wall, and
admit a free circulation of air. The cur
tains should never be drawn closely to
gether, oven In the coldest weather; and
when the season is not severe, it is agood
plan to revove them altogether. The bed
or mattress ought to bo rather hard. —
Nothing la more injurious to health than
soft beds: they effeminate the individual,
render his flesh soft and flabby and in
capaoiate him from undergoing any pri
vation. The texture of which the couch
Is made, is not of much consequence, pro
; vlded it is not too soft; hence, featherbeds,
or mattresses of hair or straw, are almost
equally good, If suitable in this particular.
We must mention, however, that the
hair mattress, from being cooler, and less
. apt to Imbibe moisture, is preferable dur
ing the summer season, to a bed of feath
era. These soft, yielding, feather-beds, in
which the body sinks deeply, are highly
improper, from the unnatural heat and
perspiration which they are sure to in
duce. , ■■
With regard to the covering, there can
bo no doubt that it is moye wholesome to
lie between sheets than blankets. For
the same" reason, people should avoid i
sleeping in flannel night-shirts. Such u
degree of warmth as is communicated by
those means’ is only justifiable In infancy
and childhood, or when there is actual
disease or weakness of constitution. Pa
rents often commit a greaterror in bring- 1
fhg up their youugpeopie under so effem
inate a system. ‘ ,
A common custom prevails of warming
the bed before going to sleep. This, ener
vating practice should be abandoned ex
cept with flellcate people, or when the
cold Is very intense. It is tar better to
let the bed be chafed by the natural heat
of the body, which, even in severe weath
er, will tro-suniorent tonne purpose, pro-.
vlded the clothing is abundant.
We ought never to sleep overloaded
with clothes, but have merely what is
siilfloient to maintain a comfortable
warmth. 1
When a person la In health, the atmos
phere of bis aportmentshould be cool; on
this account, Urea are exceedingly hurtful
and should uever be had recourse to, ex
cept when the individual is delicate, or
the weather intolerably severe. jVhen
they become requisite, smoke must be
carefully guarded against, as fatal acci
dents have arisen from this cause.
The window shutters ought never to be
entirely closed, neither ought they to be
kept altogether open. In the first case
we are opt to oversleep ourselves, owing
to the prevailing darkness with which we
I are surrounded; and in tbe,second, the
i light which fills thq apartment, especial- ,
ly if it bo In the summer season, may dis
turb oiir repose, and waken us at an earli
er hour than there is any occasion for.—
Under both circumstances, the eyes are
liable to suffer; the darkness In the one
instance, disposes them to be painfully
affected, on exposure to the brilliant light
of day, besides directly debilitating them
—for, in remaining too ranch in the
gloom, whether wo be asleep or awake,
llicaft nrasus-s.re_aurft In-hn-fnere Cf less
weakened. Xu the other case, the fierce
glare of the morning sun acting upon
them, perhaps for several hours before vyo.
get up, does equal injury, making them
tender and easily affected by the light.
The extremes of too much and too little
light must, therefore, be avoided, and
such a moderate portion'admitted into the
chamber os not to hurt the eyes, or act as
too strong a stimulus in breaking our
slumbers. •
During the summer boats, the covering
requires to be diminished, so as to suit the
atmospheric temperature; and a small
portion of the window drawn from the
top, to promote a circulation of air; but
this mhst bo done cautiously, aud the cur
rent prevented from coming directly upon
the steeper, as it might give rise to colds,
and other bad consequences.
1 Nothing is sojiijurlons as damp beds.—
It becomes every person, whether at
home or abroad, to look to this matter,
and see that the bedding on which he
lies'is thoroughly dry, and free from-even
the slightest moisture, By neglecting
such a precaution, rheumatism, colds, iu
flamatious, aud death itself may ensue.---
Indeed,’ these calamities are very fre
quently traced to sleeping incautiously in
1 damp beds. For the same reason, the
walls and floor, should be dry, and wet
clothes never buqg up in the room.
I On going to sleep, all sorts of restraints
must be removed from the body; tbe col
lar of the nightshirt should be unbutton
ed and the neckcloth taken off. With
regard to the head, the more lightly it is
covered the better; on this account, we
should wear a thin cotton or silk night
cap; and this is still better if made of
net-wort. Some persons wear worsted or
flannel caps, but these are never proper,
except in old or rheumatic subjects.- The
grand rule of health is to keep the head
cool, and the feet warm; hence, the
nightcap cannot be too thin. In fact, the
chief use of this piece of clothing is to pre
serve the hair, and prevent it from being
disordered and matted together.
Too little and too muohsleep are equally
injurious. .Excessive weakefulne.-s, pre
vents thenilroents from being digested,and
generates crude humors. Too much sleep
produces lassitude and corpulency, ami
utterly debases and stupefies tbe mind.—
Corpulent people being apt to indulge in
excessive sleep, they should break this
habit at once, as I ,' ill their cape; it. is poeu
f liarly unwholesome!' TheyoUghttoaleep
little, and that little'upon hard beds. :
ie‘ —■-
“ let us
■ '••AVitatis A'Tabb?”—Many men, al
though not as exemplaryias they should
he in their Town lives, are yob at much ,
pains -to rear their childr&n correctly. The
sentiment with them is, “ Da as I say not
as I dp.” Such a father—not far from
Cincinnati—is in the habit of getting in
toxicated, or on a “ tare,” rather often.—
Ho endeavors, however,hide the fact ,
from his children: but “little pitchers
have long ears," and children know more
of what is going on than grown, people
frequently suppose. , ' ,
One evenlngthls exemplary parent was
hearing hislittle Johnny recite his Sun
day-school lesson. It w’as from the four
teenth chapter of Mathew, wherein is re
lated the parable of the malicious indi
vidual who went about sowing tares, etc;
What is a taro ?” the parent interrup
ted to inquire.
Johnny hesitated. ’ , , •
" Tell me, my son, what a tare is ?”
“ Youhnve had ’em," said Johnny, cast
ing down his eyes and wriggling his foot.
“ Had’em!” said the astonished parent,
opening his eyes rather wide. " Why;
what do you mean. Johnny 7”
“Whdnyou didn’t come home for three,
days last week,” salil Johnny, “ X heard
mother tell Ahnt Susan' that you was off
on a tarei" ' :'" 1 , ~
The Buuday-school lesson was brought
to an abrupt- close, and Johnny, who
knew top much altogether to sit up, any
later; was sent off to bed.
During a revival at Barnstable, a min
ister deemed It his duty to diffhse himself
about the country and Induce as many of
the unregenerate us possible to come to
meeting; Among others, ho called upon
an illiterate old farmer, and asked If he
knew of any losfsheep of the house of Is
rael about there ?
“ Well, no,” was the old former’s reply,
“ f r’ally doo’t know of any. Fact, the
only sheep I do know of’bout here, are
owned by Squire Francis Bacun.’’... :
VOL. 63.—N0. 48.
Feshldns and Follies of Hair.
** a woman’s glory is In her hair,” has
oftou been quoted. If It be, she Is deter
mined to dim it Inlhesedaysof artificial
ity and fashionable folly. Now she twists
not only her own hair, but as much as
she can purchase, Into tne most Unseemly
and grotesque shapes, marring, os if with
premeditated bad taste, every gruceiul
curve and every line of beauty. A fash
ionable woman’s head at present Isa won*
der of unsightliness. Ono would not
think so many of the sex could, without
positive genius for the hldeousnes, so de
form themselves, as they do, in a single
sitting. They rise In the morning, go
from the bath comely and charming os
nature created them.. They appear two
hours later, fresh from the hands oftheir
maids, or their own manipulations, elab
orately wrought out of all symmetry and
attractiveness, especially la. regard to the
ingenuity appears to have been exhaus
ted of late years, to make woman’s hair
look like anything else; to givoiher head
a size and form and proportion little Jens
than repulsive. Curls, crimps, bands,
waterfalls, and we kuow not what, vie
I with each other in destroying the fair
I semllaucoof thehurnanhead. Themore
homely a fashion, the more likely It Is to
be a favoaite; the more unbecoming, the.
more apt It la to endure. One cannot go
luto company that pretends to be elegant,
without having his eyes pained by the
uncouthness of the hair dressing, and dis
tortion of all that good-taste would sug
gest. He is reminded of stage goblins, or
of his childish notions of the monsters of
the Arabian tales. O, for a brave, sensi
ble woman, who would dare to be natural,
dare to defy the dictate of fashion, when
fashlou arrays Itself against simplicity,
fitness and grace. Those few could re
form the follies and insanities of dress.—
What others did, they would be bold to
do, and beauty begin again. .
The present styieof wearing the water
fall ou the top of the head—it was bad
enough behind it—is simply a deformity.
It destroys the proportion of the head,
and is an excresence that no one can re*,
fraln from desiring to see removed, oven
by violence. A woman might as well
have a hump on her back, or walk .on
stilts, as it is said she did lu the early
days of Venice, or cover one* of her soli
cheeks with o black plaster, or wear rings
In her nose. But she will not believedt ;
' for no woman would consciously mar her
beauty, or diminish the grace she had in
herited. Who docs not long for the sim
ple arrangement of the hair, as we see it
In Grecian statues, plainly put back from
the face or fallingovertlieearaaudcheek,
with a neat coll behind, or a braid, If va
riety be needed? . ' , .
No woman has a right to spoil her ap
pearance for fashion’s sake. She- owes
more to beauty and to natuie, than to the
mantumaker or to caprice; and wo must
believe the time will come when the re
ally fine woman will consider carefully
the extent and sacredness of her debt and
discharge it conscientiously and religious
ly* ' -
JAPANESE SQOIAE Ut'B
A. family of the middle class generally
live in a low house, with a thatched roof.
The bouses are built in this way for safe
ty against earthquakes, which are com
mon. About a century ago, 100,000 peo
ple lost their lives In Jeddo, by an earth
quake. The husband generally has but
one wife; polygamy is.allowed, and the
wealthier men sometimes marry several
wives, to show their independence of cus
tom, or their ability to support a large es
tablishment. The marriage bond is es
teemed sacred and is rarely broken.—
Where his martial rights are invaded, the
i hnahand. may kill his wife and.her para
mour together, without fear of punish
ment. Families generally take their
meals together, the husband sitting a lit
tle apart from tire rest, to show ills superi
or dignity. At nigl)t the family always
go through a form of worship, putting
their heads down and extending their
hands’ iu invocation of their deity. In
the moruing the father goes to the door,
opens it, claps his hands and invokes the
god of day. The morning meal is soou
ready and eaten, and the children are
seut off to school, where they all learn
reading, writing and calculating, and the
girls sewing, besides. The women are
well treated, not being compelled to do
'heavy outwork, and.being admitted to
many of the lighter avocations, such as
that of clerk or bookkeeper in a store. Tlie
wife and older daughter share alsb in the
recreations of the head of the family'.
Matrimonial mafohesatogenemlly made
up by the parents or friends of the parties
interested. After the preliminaries have
been discussed the parties themselves are
consulted. If - they object strongly, tire
match is not consummated, but filial obe
dience is made so imperative a duty that
this does not often happen. When the
preliminaries are fully agreed upon the
parties are openly betrothed, witli the ex
change ot presents, and this betrothal is
rarely broken. Among the uppjjr classes
a widow may not marry' again, but in the
lower class she may. She follows her
first husband to his grave with an iron
pot on her head, her second, if she out
lives him, with two iron puts, and so on.
Suicides are frequent, both on account
of love affairs and of losses In business.—
Hanging and drowning ate the moat com
mon methods. Sari kuri, or disenibowl
ing one’s self, is reserved for the higher
classes. This is considered highly honor
aide, and it removes all disgrace, not only
from the man himself but from his family,
in whoso presence liie act is commonly
committed. An honorable way of set
tling a family feud is for one of the par
ties to kill liisenemy, and then terminate
his own life by hari kart. The last not
removes the disgrace of murder, and
leaves the family without reproach in so
ciety.
Hcll£lona Instruction at ftome
A receut writer offers the following sug
gestion to parents
" We must not forget the Importance
of striving to cultivate a frank confidence
arid sympathy in the relations of home.
It has seemed to me, in many cases to
which I have given some study, that the
great privileges and opportunities which
parents enjoy, are often destroyed by
their ..allowing great walls of spiritual
distance and alienation to rise between
themselves and their children. It Is sad
to see the children of a family growing
up Into manhood and womanhood, and
we often see them, having as little ac
knowledged communion or religious life
with their parents as If they were a par
cel of bears’ cubs; never hearing from
father or mother a simple, earnest avow
al of religious faith, much less the sim
plest worasof worship; trained by their
parents’ reserve to keep to theirownbo
soma whatever religious emotion the Spir
it of God may have quickened there; and
finding the first sympathy and mutual
confession which will ran the faint sparks
of worship and consecration on their
hearts’ altars Into a blazing flame—find
ing, this, for. the first time, after they
have gone from their childhood s home.
While I appreciate the power of a relig
ious atmosphere and of religious observ
ances in Christlannurture, itseems to me
that this habitual religious oonfidenpe ls
the most efficient and indispensable.—
Gain the perfect trust and affection of
vour child, in the early years when it
looks to you with such religious awe as
you look to God, and when the quiet
■ homo is its only temple, opens the heart
to yours In the deepest religious confes
sion, and keeps it open through the
changing years; and you cam accomplish
everything with that child for nurture
arid blessing. No Aladdin’s wonderful
lamp, no magician's potent wand could
be more soverlgn In controlling the spir
its of the vast deep, and In working mira
cles of beauty and majesty, than can the
child’s loveaud confidence become In cods
trolling itamost turbulent passions, and
building up In its soul the loveliness and
grandeur of Chrletly character, . .
— unto for:Abvertioinl
jujvßmmtDrro will Bo Inserted at Ten UcnM
per llno /br thoTflftt. taMrtJoil. ond five cento
porUne for . eaoh taU^aent' Insertion. quar
terly, half-yearly, andSWrlyadvertlsemciii* ta
serted at n liberal tadaotlonontho aßtmrrataf.
Ail vertlsemente ahdnld tie anoomponledby Ui.
CASH. When sent without any tangth at lime
specified for publication, OtoyyWll ha continued
until ordered oat and .
->• • JOB '. '"v
ted in the neoteat style; at low prices; * ■
' StISSOKISGS.
• When was young Bennett, of the Hen
rietta, In the petroleum business? when
he reached the Ho of Wight. - • r. i ( ■
“WnfE" said a-hen pecked husband,'
“go to he’d.” ‘tl wont.’’. “ WeU, then,
sit up; I will be minded I’’ • -
Tbue.—Some Joker has said tbata pris
oner before a New Jersey Court is always
a reasonable mail—he ; is so .open to con
vlction. -• , '
Who is It that sits wlth hls hat on be
fore the queen, emperor also the
President of the United States? ... The
coachman. • - ■ . ,>i"i
Wanted, for —-— r-burgh, at the Terni,’
Plain Cook; to wash, dress, and-milk a
cow. Good eharaoterlndlspenslble. Ap
ply at 08 -— : St. ;;: ,; T. ' ■ '
A man was walking quickly down the
street, the other day, when ho was sud
denly struck by a thought, and khoeked
Into the gutter. ■'] ~
The following Is a copy of a bIU ppsted
on the wall of a country village: “A lec
ture on total abstinence will be delivered
in the open-air, and a collection will be
made at the door to defray expenses." 1
Judicious Selection.-Oii Good Fri
day, in Ur town in North Wales, an older.?
Vy minister, with a bald pate. Judiciously
selected for his test. u My sins are'great;
erin number than the hairs on my head.
A gentleman was complaining that it
cost him sloevery time ho went to church,
as he only attended five It mean year, and
his pew tax was fifty dollars per annum.
.“Why don't you go oftener,!- asked a re
ligious broker* “a'nd reduce the aver,
age?” That was a poser, -
Kay had a very Indifferent meal at an
eating house the other day, and having
finished it, deposited a counterfeit piece
of Iraotlonal ourtcuoy on the counter.—
That's bad,” says the attendant.--
“ Well," said Kay, “ I had a bad dinner/.’
An excited father called in great haste
on Dr. Abeluetby and exclaimed, In an
excited manner: ■ /
“ Doctor 1 doctor! my hoyhaaswallowr
ed a mouse!" ' , ~
' “ Tueu go home,” quietly replied the
doctor, “ and tell him lo swallow a cat 1”
One day Haggle’s mamma was telling
her about tbe • creation, and when she
said. “ God made the sun, moon, and
stars,” .Haggle, who patriotic,
burst out wltli—“ And too.-’
A Witty Doctor of Divinity, whose
physicians had ordered him to live for a
;lme on a purely vegetable diet, demur
red, on the ground that he should not be
aide to say grace before meat.
A lady hired a Western country girl
for “ help,’-' and wnssurpriaed to see her
poke her head Into Jlie parlor, one after
noon, when visitors were present, and
ask: “Marm; did you call, just now ? I
thought I heard a yell!”
‘At a celebration of marriage, a
large number of young ladies present, the
minister said: “Those who- whh to be
Joined in the holy bon is of matrimony
will please stand up," and nearly ail the
young ladies arose. ‘ ■
A Young lady stepped into the store of a
merchant by the immeof Wade, and very
innocently said she would like to be
weighed (Wade). “Really. l am. verv
s'orry," said he; "but my.wife will toll
you that you are too late by. a couple of
years." V ,f
At Adrian, Mich., ft lady saw an en
gine- house with ft steeple, and innocent,
ly asked a gentleman attendant;
“What church is that?”i, r ,
The gentleman, after reading,the sign,
11 Deluge, No. 3," replied:
1 “ I guess It must be the Third Baptist.”
THEeditorpf the Alabama-Jrptiis she ws
himself jolly under what other people
might consider rattier serious:
“ Wo see that the sheriff, during' our
absence, has advertised the Argus for salt:.
We hope the bidders will have a merry
time of it. If the sheriff can sell it he
will do more than we ever could. Like
a damp percussion-cap we think it wil
fail to ‘gooff.’ 1 ’
A Sunday-School teacher was relat
ing to her class of boys, graphically, and
of course in the gravest manner possible,
the ancient Bible incident which speaks
of Joseph's going out in a chariot to meet
his father, Jacob, when she , was/inter
rupted by tlie following abrupt remark:
“Ump! Joseph thought lie;was ‘some
punkins,’ didn’t he, titling in a chariot to
meet bis dad!" -
When Joseph Bonaparte first came to
America, he traveled within number of
attendants. On.one occasion, stopping
at a betel, he was well entertained, ami
was quite profuse in his compliments to
mine host. In the' morning, when the
landlord made out his bill, he put itoeyery
item he could think of ;,yot when hp .ad
ded it up, he did noUhink that the total
was la’go enough for an ex-monarch to
pay, So ho reviewed the bill; and elided
u few more items. ‘ Yet: still - it did not
seem chough. Then ho added one more ;
“ To kicking up ah infernal fuss general
ly, fifty dollars."
“A Bit op Decent Fighting.”—A
gentleman, who was ah eye witness, re
lates that some Irish peasants belonging
to a hostile faction mot under peculiar cir
cumstances. There were two on one side
and four on tbe other, and, therefore,
there was likely to be no light. But in
order to balance'the number, one of the
numerous party joined the other side,
“ bekaae, beys,” he said, “ it would be a
turnin' shame, so it would, for four
to lick two; and except I join them,
bytho powers there’s-no chance of there
being a bit of sport or row at ail!” The
result was that he and his new friends
were victorious, so honestly did he fight.
■ It is not amiss to cross duo’s ids in writ
ing, else mistakes may occur, : as in the
cose of thV merchant who wrote to his
agent, who was cruising around the coast
of Africa, to send blin iu/o monkeyu. Now
the merchant was somewhat deficient in
orthography, sb be spelt two,! too, and, as
he omitted to cross his t, the agent, with
some surprise, read the order, ,100 mon
keys!" - ' " ' " ■’
Lord Frederick Fits Clarence was once
dining with a 'party of officers,'at: Ports
mouth, Ping., when’one; of ' them began
telling some rather heavy stories of his
exploits with animals, relating the per
formance which he had taught a; young
leopard, a tame snake, andother animals;
in foot,, If this gentleman’s' account of
himself was, to he believed,'Rarey was
nowhere, when compared to him. Lord
Frederick listened to hla vernolous storios
for some time with'the'grehtest attention,
and when be had finished, said:
“ What you say, captain, is v.ery true,
I've no doubt; any animal, however low
in the scale of nature,- may be Instructed
by a kind mastefcftnd will beootnd attach
ed to him; I, mySelf.’onoe, had a .tame
oyster, who used ; to follow me. up- and
downstairs.”
Professor Hamxmton, the horse-tamer
of Hagerstown, Indiana, is an original
genius, and as fond of a joke os he is .of
fresh air. The other day, on a train,;go
ing home from' Cincinnati, ho tried, to
raise a window in the oat Where he was
sitting, but could not move it. He oiilied
the conductor to assist him; wlth no .bet
ter result. Instantly he,, knocked the
pane of glass out with his cane, saying—
Now we will havO a little- fresh air.” —
“ Sir,” said - the conductor, “ you imust
pay for that.” “ How much?’'lnquired
the ’ Professor,. “ One dollar,” answered
the conductor. ' Professor Hamilton pass
ed him a two doliar bllt. 'Th6 Conductor
was about to hancCbaok-a dollar in
change, when the cool tamer of wild ani
mals quietly said, “Nevermind, I*ll take
another pane,-" and with another stroke
of hs ckne let GUd’siresh atmosphere in
throughaseeundwludow. •• Well,” ex
clalmed the oo'ttdaotor, '* you cant have
any wore at that prioe. - It'snot ffrstcost,”
I
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