BY Jims B. BRAXTON,
VOL. 39.
soctKai.
One undivided, faithful heart.
Odd undivided} faithful heart,
Ona gentle, artless creature,
With truth and virtue for her part.
And gladness in each feature,
Is worth (u titan far more than gold
Or India’s sparkling treasure,
Or all the wealth by nations sold
In over running measure.
One undivided, crusting heart,
. When other friends are flown,
Will joy and gladness free impart,
. And whisper “ft's ihint own*
Whatever may betide thee here,
That faithful heart is thine,
And never shall thou cherish fear,
Cut on its love recline.
Away with those who fain would make
A score of hearts their altar,
Aod when (hey cannot heal, will break
And cause true love to falter.
Give me the heart that hath that love
Which naught on earth can sever,
Then 1 no more away will rove,
But cherish it forever.
A LITTLE 'WORD,
A little word in kindneas spoken,
A'motion or a tear,
1148 often healed a heart that's broken,
And made a friend sincere.
A word—a look—has crushed lo oarlll{
Full many a budding flower,
Which hud a smile but owned its birth,
Would bless life's darkest hour.
Then deem it nut an idle thing,
A pleasant word lo speak,
Tho face you wear, tho thoughts yon bring,
A heart may heal or break-
fßtsctUmtmm.
THE THREE HAMMS.
An old soldier, entitled to his discharge from the
army, on Uio score of long service and wounds, being
upon the point ofquUling i.ia regiment, weal to make
hts adieus to his captain.
'Ah, well, moo brave,' said his officer, ‘so you are
about to leave us—to exchange the Hfu of a soldier
fur that of a citizen. Now, as this career will bo
somewhat novel to you, my esteem and friendship,
which you have won by your bravery and good con*
duct,prompt nto lo offer you a little advice before
parting; and if you will submit to the conditions of
that advice, without a picsenlsccUing to divine their
motive, you will never have causa to regret having
followed my counsel.
'What I only three louts d'or, and a few francs lo
defray the expense of my journey T’
'Very well, give me the three luuls d'or, and 1 will
give you three maxims for your guidance.’
•Tho state of my finances renders that a dear bar
gain,'said thu soldier; 'nevertheless us wisdom is
more precious than gold, and in order to prove to you
CUo confidence which I, in common with the of
my comrades, repose in you. I consent to it.' And
<Ho soldier handed the three louis d'or—all his for
tune—(o the captain.
•Very good,' said the captain; *oow, my friend
listen 10, recollect, and putin constant practice those
three maxims:—Keep tho straight road; Never med
dle with the affairs of others; and Postpone your
anger lo the morrow. In tbo meantime, await me
hero a few minutes.'
The o‘d soldier remained, pensively loaning uponj
tils musket, and somewhat repentant of hlt> bargain.
‘Keep Uio straight road, novor meddlo in the affairs
of others, and postpone your anger to the morrow
very wise, assuredly; and very well worth three louis
d'or, only it is rather unfortunate that thceum should
happen to be tlio whole of tny fortune.’
In a few minutes, the captain returned end placed
a small loaf of bread in the hands of the soldier, ex*
acting from him - the promise that ho wodld not cut
unlit that moment arrived which ho should consider
the happiest of bis life. Then, embracing each oth
er wiilt that sincerity and affection which character
jics ell (rue Frenchmen and old companions in arms,
they bid each uther aditm.
Tho’soldier took up his lino of march for homo.
Having been joined by d companion do voyage, to
words the evening of the same day they arrived ut a
paint where the road separated into two broncho* ;
the one, wide and apparently easy, turned a little to
thb right; while the other, narrow and difficult In
appearance, was the direct continuation of the grand
route. The travellers hesitated for an instant, de
liberating which road to follow ; when the soldier,
recollecting the first parting mixim of his captain,
said :
‘I keep the straight road.'
•And I,’said the comrade, ‘shall choose the ca
sicsl.’
But the unfortunate traveller found that this rood,
so wido und easy at its entrance, terminated in a
gloomoy forest, the haunt of wild boosts and lawless
men. lie paid the penalty of his unwise choice.that
night, and on the morrow tiro soldier learned that
liis companion of tbo proceeding d*y had boon oa
sasslnatcd.
‘Ah, mon chcr caplalno,' thought ho, 'your first
maxim, at least, was not a dear one I Truly, wisdom
Is more precious than fine gold. 1
The sumo day ho arrived at the auburgo of a small
village; and, In conversation with sumo of the peas
ants, they advised him to visit in his quality of a
soldier, a certain marquis, the proprietor of a neigh
boring cliutouu, who made a pleasure of dispensing
the must liberal hospitality to all military men whq
might happen to pass on tho road. Following their
advice, ho was received with courtesy and politeness,
-assured a hearty welcome,and invited to the table of
tho nobleman.
But, wonderful to relate, In the midst of the supper,
a lady clothed entirely in black, with a low step and
downcast eyes, entered and look her soot ol the table;
and this lady, of noble birth and a French woman,
drank from a human skull I
The soldier, however, noticed not this cirounißlanco
and tho conversation proceeded, as usual, without
interruption. It was hot that he was less curious to
discover the moaning of this extraordinary conduct;
but thoßubslantlalbonefit ho had derived from fob
lowing tho principle contained in tho first maxim,
caused him to appreciate the second: Never meddle
in the affairs of other*.
After supper, when the Udy had boon somewhat
absent, the marquis addressed himself to the soldier,
and regarding him fixedly, said:
> *My friend, you aro no ordinary man, for a most
remarkable econo has boon enacted before your eyes,
and yet you havo not msdo tho loast remark.’
‘Monseignour,’ responded tho soldier, 'it is one of
my principles never fc to meddle in tho business of
others.*
‘Bravo man 1* exclaimed > the marquis, ‘I perceive
(hat 1 can trust you,*and that you aro a man of hen*
or and prudence. Follow mo, and you will loam
the value of your discretion.*
Taking tholourch ho led the soldier by a winding
passage to a subterranean voult. But, oh, horror!
the pale and vasclllatiog light of the flambeau woe
reflected on the sides by ghastly skeletons, which its
lllokeilnga seamed to reanimate,and which appeared
Co menanco (he (wo visitors.
,'Listen, my friend,* said the nobleman i ‘tho b**°k
lady whom you hats seen to night, is the lady of
(ho chateau, condemned to drink at my table, iron*
the skull of her lover, whom 1 havo killed. Iho
bonea are the bones of travellers who have seen pro*
oiaely what you have seen, but have not been poss*
eased of your prudence. Ibavo satisfied their ourl-
oslty, and .their death alono could protect mo from
the consequences. Your discretion has saved your
life. And now, my friend, os a proofof my appreci
ation of your prudence and good judgement, accept
this purse. You arc at liberty to remain at the
chateau as long as you may choose,or, If you prefer,
to continue your journey.*
Conceive, If possible, tlio emotions of iho old soldi
er. Who would wonder, if he had that night often I
repeated in bis steep, 'never meddle in Iho affairs of
others,’
The ocit morning ho continued his route, and the
remainder of bis journey passed without any
adventure of interest. Ho at last arrived in
sight of his cottage, where all that was most dear to
his heart awaited him—that heart beat quick as ho
placed his foot upon the threshold. Without announ
cing hi msclf, ho entered; but, alas, what a reception!
for behold—oh, fruits of absence, the first object that
met his astonished gate, was a young priest tenderly
embracing fits wife .'
With the decision of an old-warrior, be levelled
his musket, and ip another instant a ball would have
forced the breast of the priest; but a thought arrested
his hand, penetrating his soul like an electric shot
—Postpone your anger to the morrow ! and ho low
cred his musket, and hung his head, overcome with
disappointment and despair.
His-joatousy, however, was not of long duration ;
for, behold, upon an explanation this priest was his
son! Adopted in his infancy by the good.ettro of
ilia village, who had directed his studies,.ho had re
cently taken holy orders, ond preceded bill a few
moments tho arrival ofhis father.
Thus tho old soldier, after a long absence ; had at
last returned lo his family, and had found his son a
priest—tho ne plus ultra of human perfections in (ho
popular estimation. When had bo ever conceived
of such happiness as this I It was assuredly tho
moment locut the loaf of broad—but hardly had ho
done so, when a playful kitten, wishing to share in
iho general joy, sprung towards some brilliant ob
jeel that rolled from the loaf upon the floor. It was
tho three louts d'or, which had been placed there by
tho good captain !
Joe Bangs and Ills Dog.
The Carpel Bag tclla a funny story of Joe Bangs,
who dld’nt believe in either electricity or magnetism.
Telegraphs wore lo him all nonsense; Dr. Fronblin’s
ex per i meat with a kite was a humbug; and Joe was
even heard (o hint (hat tho philosophic doctor had
been imbibing before ho went lo try it, and that the
consequence was the doctor fell tho Influence of tho
fluid that was bottled, instdad of that which ho wan
ted lo boltlo. But Joo was finally cured of his un
belief. A man named Clarke came along through
Iho village, adveitising to givo persons afflicted with
disease magnolia shocks which Immediately euro
them. And, to givo every one abettor chance, he
had his machine pul up in Squire Brown’s ‘grocery
■hup,* where Joe was in the habit of going evenings
lo smoko his pipe and talk over the news. Joe had
a dog ; snubnosed and short earned cur dog, very
snappish and anarcly, and of diminutive size. One
! evening, Joe went into tho shop, followed by. his dog,
1 and sat down, and his dog lay down by tho stove.
Presently Dr. Clark dropped in.
He soon began to talk about his machine, and
challenged Joo to lake some of the fluid. Joe said
‘No!' but (hey might givo it to hia dog if they want*
cd to, (hoy asked him if ho would hold the dog, ‘Yes,
ho would hold the dog.' So Joo took hold of tho dog
and the wires were hold to his head and tail. Tho
doctor put on a heavy charge and set tho michino a
going. Suddenly, over went Joo ono way, and over
wont Joo’s dog tho other way.
110 had taken an extra dose, and Joe, with groat
deal of effort picked np his hat and sloped. Ho was
never afterwards hoard lu express an opinion on
magnetism or electricity.
An Irishman** Mistake*
A correspondent of the Boston Herald tolls the
following good story,:
A few monthsngo, as Brother Ingalls, of Swamp
scott, was travailing through the Western part of (ho
Statu ufNcw York, ho full in with an Irishmanwho
had lately-arrived in this country, who was in quest
of a brother that came on before him and settled in
some of tho dlgglns in that vicinity.
Put was a strong, athletic man ; a true Catholic,
and iud never seen the interior of a Protestant
church. It was a pleasant Sabbath morning that
Brother Ingalls met Pal, who inquired the road to
the nearest churoli.
Ingalls is a good pious man. fie told Pat ho was
going to church himself, and invited his new made
acquaintance to accompany him thither, hie place of
destination being a small Methodist meeting house
near by. Thero was a grout revival there at that
time, and one of tho doacons (who, by the way, was
very email in stature) invited Brother I to lake
a soar in his pew. Ho accepted (ho invitation and
walked in, followed by Pul who looked in vain for
the altar, &o. After ho was seated ho turned to
Brother I———,and In a whisper which could bo
heard all around, Inquired :
‘Sure, nnd isn’t this a heretic church V
‘Hush 1’ said Ingalls,‘if you spotk a loud word
they will pul you ouliinmcdhiioty.'
•XJ'ivil a word will I speak at all at all,’ replied
Pat.
Tho meeting was opened with prayer by the pas
tor. Pal was eying him very closoly ; suddenly an
old gentleman, who was standing in the pew directly
in front of Pul, shouted‘glory,’ ‘lliss-l, yo divll,’
rejoined Put, with his loud whisper, which was hoard
by tho minister, 'be dacenl, and don't make a black
guard of yorsclf.'
The parson grow more and moro fervent in his
devotions. Presently (ho deacon uttered an audible
groan. ‘His-s-l, yo blackguard, have yo nodaccncy
at til,' said Pal, at tho same lime giving tho deacon
a punch in (ha ribs, whinh caused him nearly to
lose his cqulibrium. Tho minister slopped, and ex
tending Ids hind in a supplicating manner, said,
•Drothuron, wo cannot bo disturbed in (his way; will
some one put that man out V
'Via, your rioerence,' shouted Pat, *1 will,* and
suiting the action to tho word, ho collared the deacon,
and to lire utter horror and astonishment of tho pas
tor, Brother Ingalls, and the whole congregation, ho
dragged him through the aisle, and with a tremen
dous kick, a posteriori, as the logicians have ii, ho
landed him in tho vestibule of tho chuich.
Brother Ingalls mizzled. It is not probable tin
to lus seen tho interior of a country church since.
Healv's Picture os Webster.—A subscription
lias been started among tho merchants of Boston, to
raise funds sufficient to purchase Hoaly's groat pic
ture of’Wobslcr replying to Iluyno.’ Uis proposed
to present Iho painting to tho city of Boston. Tho
proposition is to obtain @2OO each, from 20 perilous.
Ono gentleman hot offered to givo $5OO,
Tho Census of Franco of 1851 gives ono curious
result. Tho number of women is greater than that
of monl Tho difference is extraordinary, being
nearly a million and a half. In Parle tho differ
ence is on tho other aldo, there being 25,000 more
men than women.
“Go it, Dobtaii, he’s gaining on you,” is now
rendered, or ought to bo—“Proceed, Robert's ex
tremity,tho gentleman in tho roar is approximating
to an inconvenient vicissitude of tho longitudinal
appendage which subtends tho lower extension of
your caudol elongation.”
A Match. —Hero is a match for the Kentuckian
who got in a saltbin to keep himself from spoiling,
for want of a fight:
There is a man In Vermont who has been for
tho last Iwenty-fivo years engaged in a law suit.
At the last session, by somo unaccountable mis
take of tho lawyers in the ease, his suit was brought
to a close, since which, his health has rapidly de
clined. Ho Is trying his best to pick another
quarrel with somebody, as ho finds it impossible
to e£fcl long out of hie element.
OUR COUNTRY—MAY rr ALWAYS-BK RIQIIT—OUT RIGHT or WRQI*o, oil? - covntui
CARLISLE, PA., THURSDAY, AUGUST 5, 1852.
SELLING CHICKENS TO THE LEQI9LA
. TORE* - .
* While the Legislature of Missouri was in ses
sion, a few years ago, a green fellow from the
country came to Jefferson to sell some chickens.
He had about two dozen, all of which he had tied
by the logs to a string, and this, being divided
equally, and thrown across his horse or his should
-1 er, formed his mode of conveyance, leaving the
fowls with their heads hanging-down, with Utile
else of them visible except the naked legs, and a
promiscuous pile of out-stretched wings and ruffled
feathers.. After several ineffectual efforts to dis
pose of his load, a wag, to whom ho had made an
offer of sale, told him he did not want chickens
himself, but that perhaps he could sell them at
that large stone'house over there, (the capitol.) that
there was a man over there buying on speculation
for the Si. Louis market, and, no doubt, he could
find a ready sale.
The delighted countryman started, when his in
formant stopped him.
“Look here,” says he, “when you gel over there,
go up stairs, and then turn to the left. The man
stops in (hat targe room, and is now engaged with
a number of fellows buying chickens. If a man
at the door should stop you, don’t mind him. He
has got chickens himself for sale, and trios to pre
vent other people from selling theirs.
Following the directions, our friend soon found
himself at the door of the Hall of Representatives.
To open it and enter was the work of a moment.
Taking from his shoulder the string of chickens,
and giving them a shake, to freshen them, he com
menced hie journey towards the Speaker’s chair,
the fowls, in the meantime, loudly expressing,
from the half-formed crow to the harsh quaark,
their bodily presence, and thoir sense of bodily
pain.
••I say, air," '—Hero he had advanced about
half down the aisle, when he was seized by Major
Jackson, the doorkeeper, who happened vo be re*
turning from the Clerk's dosk.
“What the devil are you doing here wilh these
chickens; get out, get out,” whispered the door
keeper.
•*No you don’t, though, you can’t come that
game over me. You’ve got chickens yourself for
sale, get you out yourself, and let me sell mine.—
I say, sir, (tn a louAov uj the Speaker,) ate
you buying chickens here to-day 1 I’ve got some
: prime ones here.”
And he held up his string and shook his fowls
until their music made the walls echo.
“Let me go, sir, (to the doorkeeper,) let me go,
1 say. Fine large chickens (to the Speaker,) only
six bits a d ozen,”
“Where’s the Sergeant-at-Arms?” roared the
Speaker —“take that man out.”
“Now don’t, will you, 1 ain’t hard to trade with.
You tel me go (to the doorkeeper,) you’ve sold
your chickens, now let mo have a chance. I say,
sir, (to the Speaker, in a louder lone,) are you buy
ing chickens to-- — ll
“Go ahead,” “at him again,” “that’s right,”
whispered some of the opposition members, who
could command gravity enough to apeak, “at him
again.” “He’ll buy them.” “Ho only wants
you to take loss—at him again.”
“I say, sir, (in a louder lone, to the Speaker,)
cuss your picture, let roe go—fair play—two men
to ono ain’t fair, (to the Speaker, and Sergeam-at-
Arms,) let mo go; i say, sir, you up there, (to the
Speaker,) you can have ’em for six bits—won't
take A cent loss. Take ’em homo and eat ’em my
self before I’ll lake——Drat you hides, don'tshovo
so hard, will you ! you’ll hurt them chickens, and
they have had a travel of it to-day, anyhow. I
say, you sir, up there——”
Hero the voice was lost by the closing of the
door. An adjournment was moved and carried,
and the members, almost frantic wilh mirth, rush,
ed out to find our friend in high altercation with
the doorkeeper oboul the meanness of selling his
own chickens, and letting nobody else sell theirs,
adding, “(hat if he could just sec that man up
there by himself he’d be bound they could make a
trade, and that no man Could afford to raise chick
ens for loss than six hits.”
The members bought his fowls a pony purse,
and our friend left the Capitol saying, as ho went
down the stairs,
‘‘Well, this is llio darndeal roughest place for
aellmg chickens that over I carao across, sure.”—
Spirit tif the 'l\mes.
Locking up tlio To\v«r of Londoili
Few persons are aware of iho strictness with
which the Tower of London is guarded Iroin foes
without and treachery within. The ceremony of
shutting it up every night continues to be os sol
emn and os rigidly precautionary as If the Frorioh
Invasion was actually afoot, immediately after
“tattoo” all strangers are expelled ; and tho gates
once closed, nothing short of such imperative ne
cessity as Are or sudden illness can procure their
being ro-opened (ill tho appointed hour next morn-
ing,
Tho ceremony of locking It up is very oncronl,
curious and stately. A few minutes before the
clock strikes iho hour of eleven—on Tuesdays,
and Fridays twelve—tho Head Warden [Yeoman
Porter,] clothed in a long red cloak, bearing In his
hand a huge bunch of keys, and attended by o
broihcr Warden, carrying a glgonllo lantern, ap
pears in front ot iho main guard house, and calls
ouljin a loud voice, “Escort keys!” At these
words the Sergeant of tho Guard, with five or six
men, turns out and follows him to tho “Spur/’ or
outer gale; each sentry challenging ns ilioy pass
his post “Who goes Ihcrot” “Keys.” The gales
being carefully locked ond barred, Iho Warden
wearing as solemn an aspect and making as much
noise os possible—the procession returns, iho sen
tries exacting tho same explanation and receiving
iho same answer as before. Arrived once mure in
front of tho main-guard house, tho sentry gives o
loud stamp with his fool, ond the following con
versation takes plaoo between him and the ap
proaching party:
“Who goes there V’
“Keys.”
“Whoso keys!”
“Queen Victoria’s ke^.”
“Advance, Quoon Victoria’s keys, and all’s
well ”
Tho Yooman Porter then exclaims, “God bless
Quoon Victoria.” Tho main guard devoutly re
sponds “Amon.” Tho officer on duly gives the
word ‘•Present arms I" flro-locka ralile; tho officer
kisses tho hill of his sword, the escort fall-in among
their companions, and (ho Yooman Porter marches
majestically across tho parade alono to dopdsil the
keys in tho Lieutenant's lodgings.
Tho ceremony over, not only is all ogross and
ingress totally precluded, but oven within tho walls
no ono oan stir without being furnished with the
countersign; and any ono who, unhappily forgetful,
ventures from his quarters unprovided with this
talisman, is to bo rnado a proy to tho first aonlinol
whoso post ho crosses.
All of which Is pleasantly absurd, and reminds
us of tho stately mannor in which tho orowtvwps
carried about whon tho Whito Tower was on fire.
For every month a woman spends in tho mar
riagestato between seventeen and twonty-ono years
of ago, a year will bo taken from tho duration of
her beauty and personal attractions.
Of all the impostors and calumniators in tho
world, wo most despise those who entrench them
selves behind church pows, and tho sanctity of re
ligion,
An Oriental Myth,
An Aracian sage—do eaya an Oriental myth—
wishing to explain thit all things are not as they
seem, bade his disciples go to a fountain that
gushed out ot the sands by his tent-side, and dip
up a calabash of its) water, and told him to sit
down and look intently into it, and toll what bo
saw.
« k l see strange things,” said the disciple, after
ho had gazed steadfastly awhile. “I see a cara
van just perlshing with thirst, and the water is all
gono from the bottles of the Arabs, and the cam
els even are fainting; and I see an old Arab pros
trate himself upon the hot sand and curse Allah in
his rage of (hirst. It is awful to see !”
“Look again, 1 * said the sage.
“Now the camels are snuffing a moist wind
newly blowing. They revive, and hasten on till
they bring tho perUhlng Bedouin lo a place of
springs and 'paloi'i and there they drank ond are
refreshed, and Wees theniaelvees that their good
fortune carriedfhem lo this fountain of a thousand
years.”
f ‘LooU, again.”
“AhJVsaid the disciples, “f seo the strongest
thing! (Tho palm trees are inverted, and their
roots are in heaven, and tho stream is pouring out
of the hollow of God’s hand.”
“Yes my son,” said the sage—“He saved their
lives even while they cursed him. Remember,
our trees of blessings are all rooted in heaven,
though it seems not so to us; and our rivulets of
comfort, though they reach our Ups through the
golden goblet of one friend, or the poor gourd of
another—and we thank these friends as the givers
—do they not all (low from the hollow of His
handl Nmo, therefore, our God, we thank the:,
and praise thy glorious name /”
Quoting Scripture.
A worthy deacon in the good town of F. was
remarkable for tho facility in which ho quoted
Scripture on all occasions. The divine word was
ever at his tongue’s end, and all tho trivial as well
as important occurrences of life furnished occasions
for quoting tho language of the Bible, What is
better, however, the exemplary man made his quo
tations the standard of action. One hot day, he
was engaged in mowing, wilh his hired roan, who
was leading off, the deacon following to his swath,
Kin ant ciuntations, when the man sudden
ly sprang from his place, leaving toe uw<uu juoi in
lime locßcapo a wasp’s nest.
“What Is the mailer 1” hurriedly Inquired the
deacon.
“Wasps!” was tho laconic reply.
“Pooh!” said the deacon, “the wicked floe when
no man pursuoth, but tho righteous are as bold as
a lion;” and taking (he workman’s swath, be mov
ed but a step when a swarm of brisk insects moved
about his cars, and he was forced (o retreat, with
many a painful sting, and in gteat discomfiture.
“Aha!” shouted tho other, with a chuckle, “the
prudent man forseeth tho evil, and hideth himself,
but tho simple pass on and are punished.”
Tho good deacon had found his equal in making
application to the sacred writing, and thereafter,
was not known to quote Scripture in a mowing
field.
Mercantile Questions and Ironical Answers*
Q. What is double entry 1
A. Charging the same thing twice,
Q. What Is single entry 1
A. Charging,a man with goods, bulfiol crediting
the cash he pays for them.
Q. What Is a blotter 1
A. An editor,
Q. What is a ledger 1
A. A counting house companion, upon which
people often spend their entire fortune.
Q. What is a banker ?
A. The man that has the deal.
Q. Whai is the business of a banker 7
A. Catching suckers.
Q. What is an inland draft?
A. An easterly wind.
Q. What is a foreign draft?
A. A glass of cogniac.
Q. What is a promissory nolo?
A. Acceptance of an invitation.
Q. What is a negotiable note?
A. Don’t know—never could make ono.
Battle or W aterloo. —In this great battle tho
Fronch had ‘236 guns on the field, and the English
166, and the Prussians 101—making a total of
506. The noise of those pieces exceeded every
thing of the kind tho old soldiers had ever heard,
and made the very earth shako for miles around
tho field. Tho guide pointed out a spot where,
during the hoot of (ho fighting one of (he powder
tumbrils exploded, throw Iho artillerymen into (lie
air, and shook tho horses to pieces. Tho echoes
of the cannonade of this awful battle ore said to
have been heard on tho southern borders of the
Urhish coast, Upwatds of 50,000 men fell in (ho
strife; 20,000 on the side of the allies, and 30,000
on tho side of tho French. Tho losses of this day
put Europe in mourning. England and France
wept like mothers together. A victor, who pass
ed over (ho field Iho next day, slates that as he ap
proached it, the first tiling that struck him at a
distance, was the quantity of hats and copsstrow
od over the ground. It appeared us if it had boon
cohered with crows. The field ilsolf scorned flood
ed with blood. The number of dead horses and
men baffled compulation. Tho peasantry employ
ed in burying tho dead generally Stripped the bo
dies first, and thereby gained vast booty. Tho
track over which the guard moved, and over which
diey fiod, was still covered with their spoil, and
marked by (ho traces of horses, tho wheels of can
non, and tho deeper furrows of bombs ond shells.
A thousand Fronch lay dead on the spot, and tho
quantity of hostlers, standard holders, bridles,
straps and girths denoted a fearful conflict of cav
alry. The ground seemed quite cut to pieces with
the struggling of horses’ feet.
Scene in a Justice Room.—The Hartford Times
vouches for Iho following story :
'Pal Malone, you are lined five dollar® for assault
and battery on Mike Sweeny.’
‘l've the money in my pocket, and I'll pay the fine
ifyor honor will give mo the resale.'
•Wo give no receipts hero. Wo just take tho mon
ey. You will nut bo called on the second time for
your Guo.’ ,
‘But, yor honor, I'll not bo wanting to pay tho samo
without I gel a resale.*
*What do you want -with it 7
,If yor honor will write ono and give it to mo, I
will tell you.’ . . .
•Well, thdrois your receipt. Now what do you
W lrVtill yor honor. You aoo, I’ll bo ftfthor dying
ono of tlicso days, and whon I got to the gale of
hoaren I’ll rap, and 81. Potor will aay, ‘Who’s litoral*
and I'll say,‘lt’s mo, Pal Malone,' and he’ll‘sty,
>\Vhaldo you want?'and I’ll aay, •I want to com©
In' Then ho'llaay,‘Did you behave yorself like a
dttcontlboy in the other world, and pay all your little
i fines tad such things 7* and fit aay, *Yos, your ho
liness, 1 paid all of them j* and he'll want to ace my
rcialoa, and I’ll pul my hand into my pocket and
• take my resale and give it to him; and I'll not have
i to go plodding all over perdition to find yor honor lo
f get ODD.*
If you soo & squall arising In the latitude of your
wife, frhal course should bo pursued io avoid Us
consequences t Double her capo with your loft
arm, and lot your lips drop anchor at tho cruising
ground of “smacks.”
THE FOUR MASTER SPIRITS*
Happening to cast my eyes over tho portraits in a
gallery of paintings, 1 remarked that they were so
arranged as to give four pcrsonogea-Alcxandor, Han
nibal, Ctosar, and Bonaparte—tho most conspicuous
places. I had seen tho same before, but never did a
similar train of reflections ariso in roy bosom, as
when my mind hastily glanced over their several
histories.
Alexander, having climbed the dltzy heights of
ambition, and with bis temples bound with chaplets
dipped in (ho blood ofeouotlass nations, looked upon
a conquered world and wept that there was not
another to conquer, sot a city on fire, and died in a
disgraceful scene of dobsneh.
Hannibal, after having, to the astonishment and
consternation of Romo, passed the Alps—and having
pul to (light the armies of the ’mistress of tho world,’
and stripped threo bushels of gold rings from the fin
gers of her slaughtered knights, and made her very
foundation quake—returned to his country to be de
famed, to bo driven in exile, and to die at last by
poison administered by his own hand, ualamcntcd
and unwept in a foreign clime.
Ctnsar, after haying taken eight hundred cities, and
dyed his garments! in (he blood of bis follow man—
after having pursued lo death the only rival on oorlh
—was assassinated by those no considered his near
est friends, and at the very moment whoa he bad
gained (ho highest point ofhis ambition.
Bonaparte, whoso mandate kings and prosts obey
ed, after having filled tba osith with terror of his
name—after having deluged Europe with tears »nd
blood, and clothed the world in sackcloth—closed his
days in lonely banishment, almost exiled from the
world, yet where ho could sometimes see his coun.
try’s banner waving over tho deep, but which Would
not, nor could not bring him old.
Thus thoso four men, who, from the peculiar situ
ation of their portraits, seem to stand as representa
tives of all thoso whom the world calls ’groat,* those
four who made tho earth tremble to its centre—seve
rally died—one by intoxication, the second by sui
cide, the third by osaassinalioo, and tholast in lonely
exile.
How vain is tho greatness of tbe world 7 How
fearful Is Ibo gill of genius, if it bo abused ! Who
that Is now living would not rather die the death of
the humble, rlghtoousrnan. than (hat of Alexander,
or Hannibal, or Ctesar, or Bonaparte.
HOME .
Sweet homo! How lovely, how charming Ibo
o — r iiiina ■□□cars more pleasant around
)ur childhood homo, than in any spot on uarm.
llow dear must be the place to the traveller, when
ho can return from his long journey to the loved
ones around the fireside of homo, and pass bis days
in peace and quiet.
My wild wood home! Thou Eden of rest! Peace
and plenty have I always shared with thee. Situated
an a high eminence, surrounded by beautiful scoqo.
ry, thou art to mo lovely, indeed!
All of my fondest and most affectionate friends are
here—father, mother, brother and sister. What
dearer friends are there in this wide world? None
so dear to mo. And wo all cling round our rural
home.
The VVotntQ’i Valuables,
Some of tbe brightest pages in history are those
which illustrate the heroism and fidelity of woman.
Wo remember of reading of a beautiful and affect
ing incident which occurred in the wars of Guelphs
and GhibbcUncs illustrative of these trails, which
wc refer to our bachelor readers in this section of
country. The Emperor Conrad hod refused all
terms nf capitulation to tho garrison of Wlnnesburg,
but (ike a (rue knight, he granted the requsetof (he
women to poes out m safety, with such of their moat
precious effects as they could themselves carry.—
When the gales were opened, a long procession of
matrons end maidens appeared, each bearing on her
shoulders—not her treasures, her household goods,
or her trinkets—but a husband, a son, a father, or
brother. As they passed through the enemy's linos,
all respectfully made way for them, while the whole
camp rang wilh shouts of applause.
Bachelor reader, will you allow us to ask whether
there is a maiden or a matron on whom you could
roly for a similar service in case of emergency.
To Apprentice Doys,
Bo faithful, boys. A goad, faithful-apprentice will
always make a worthy and industrious man. Tho
correct habits of youth are nut lost in man. Assooi
ale with no youth addicliccs. Spend your leisure
hours at somo profitable pursuit,
Do not go to any place of amusement where the
mind is not really benefited. Do not eland at the
corner of streets, or lounge in shops uf bad repute.—
Always havo a useful book to take up, or a good
newspaper.
Read the lives of such es Franklin, Halo, Dodd-
ridge, Locke, Newton, Johnson, Adams, Washington .
&.0., men who have been useful in life, and left be
hind them characters which aro worthy of imita
tion.
Break not tho Sabbath. Always attend church;
never lot your seal bo vacant, except you are sick,
or away from homo. Be kind to all your associates.
Cultivate benevolent feeling». If you boo distress or
sorrow,du all that in youllcs to .dloviato them.
When a friend or companion is confined by sick
ness, make it a point to call upon him, and bestow
all little favors possible upon him. If you cultivate
kind feelings,you will seldom quarrel with another.
It is always better to suffer wrong than to do wrong.
Wo should never heal uf mobs or public outbreaks if
men would cultivate tho kind feelings of the heart.
Finally, make the Bible your study. Live by Us
fircccpls. In all your trials and disappointments,
tore yod will find peace and consolation. You wilt
bo auslaiacd in life and supported in death.
Good A<lrice»
What If the people do sposk against you 7 Let
them foci (hat you are able to bear It. What is
there gained by slopping to correct every word (hat
is whispered to your discredit! Lies will die if let
alone ; but if you repeat (hem to this one and aoolh
or, because your enemies had the Impudence to make
them, you keep the fire burning and open (ho way
fora dozen slanderers. Keep on your course,go
straight forward, and trouble not your head about
what is repeated, but fool all tho bettor, and wear a
less frightful face. Slander never killed a starling
character, and it never will. Her curse will never
sot upon him without a pull hero, a Jerk there, and a
twist down below ; and white (hi* wqrk Is going on,
tho false words ore forgotten by the multitude.
Dow Jr.'s Faith.—l believe that kicking against
society and spitting in tho face of fashion, is a futile
and foolish endeavor. Doth may need correction—
but they must and will have (heir own way.
1 believe that if tho devil bo tho father of liars, bo
has a plagued large family to look after, aod that
it is rapidly increasing.
I believe girls are like kittens—gently smooth
them the right way, they rue and purr most affection
atoly ; but give them tho contrary brush, and their
back la up tn tho most disdainful mannor. They
Uko lo bo kissed, but sham a delicacy about tbo
operation. ,
1 believe (ho human flesh la bard to digest. Jo
nah did't ait easy on (ho stomach of the whale.
1 believe tbit simple honesty, tho naked truth,
pure virtue, and a straight up-and-down tray of
dealing with tho world, havo oa much advantage
over Che viocs, tricks and stratagems in the long run,
as a good square-trotting horse hat over a prancing
pony or ft racker that goes his mile or two like tho
mischief, and !s done for the rest of the journey.
Schooling.— 'Who ia the strongest man 7*
•Tho man that can lift his notes every day with
out borrowing.’ . . . . „ .
•Smart boy— blow your nose with the bellows, and
thtfn tell mo bow much pickle Lot'a wife would have
made. School ia dismissed to slide Oft the bannis
ters.’
wttooiEiiism
Don’t Stand on Uae Tracks
Tho (rain. says a .{pad Gazette, may-steal
suddenly upon yon and then- e JlUIe .trepldatlop, A
stighl misstep, a slip of the foot, and we shudder to
think of your crushed and, bleeding body. So, In
the journey of life, perils are around you on every
hand. But don't stand in tbolr path .and .disregard
them. Perhaps yon now and, then takjo allUlo Intox.
icating drink. •My friend,if .so, you are standing
"on the track," while the ear of retribution Comee
tbundering on—moving |n a right liporrapprotchlng
with steady spd rapid wheels, vVill it tmt bear down
and crusb|yaa7 perhaps you spend.
evening with a parly of friends, amusing yourself
with cards or dice, staking small sums to make the
game interesting. My friends you are 4 * standing
on tho track." Thousands have stood there and
perished. Don't wait (o hear, thp .rattling of the
rushing wheels, but fly from the .track. At A safe
distance, stand and view the wrecks Whiob your.poo*,
dcrous train will spread before you. Look well .to
tho ground on which you plant youf feet,and forget
not for those many days out parting words. w Don't
stand on tho track. 4 ’
The Two Cats,
Ino loitowtug au>,v*.u -kl-K ha* Kiysn told,
many learned men, originated with-the painter din
rot. His only pets wore a eat and kitten Id progeny.
A friend, seeing two holes in tbo bottom of bis door,
asked him for what purpose ho made. (hem Chore;—
Barret said it was for bis cats togo,lD,apd oat*
* Why,* replied his friend, ‘ would not one do fbr
both V
‘ You silly mao,' answered tbo painter, * bow coaid
(he big cal get Into (he little bote V '
* Bui.’ said his friend, 1 could not the little one go
through the big hole 7’
‘ Egad,’ said Barrel, * so she could, bat 1 dld’t think
of that.’
Fashionable Bntelde,
The Richmond Republican, In tbo coarse of a
sensible article on Fashion, gives these valuable bints
to Uio ladies:
‘Within a year or two past, corsets have been par*
lially abandoned, bnl a aubstilulo equality ts,.det
(motive (o health, has been adopted. In old tirpep,.
ladica used to wear just enough petticoats to
them comfortable, and these were kept in their places
by shoulder strops. But now, it's no uncommon
thing to see a woakly, delicate little creature preun*
bulating the street with six or eight skirts—some of
them thick and heavy enough for horse blankets-**,
tied tightly around her waist, thereby healing the
spine, and creating s pressure upon the abdomen,
»r * aonlieJ An. the back of S mule,
would kill him at dead as Julius Ctcsar m less than,
a month. Advise her against these things, and you
qio answered, ‘it is fashionable to dress so, and one
had aa well bo out oflho world as out of fashion.*—
Fashion the duco. It’s fashionable for some fools to
kill themselves oQtrighl*knd be done with it. We
therefore advise thoso ladies who are willing to die
for fashion, to adopt that course, instead of panning
another equally certain, but much slower—the onlv
difToronco being that they determine to commit sut
cido by improper dressing, the - doctors have the
benefit ofthoir decline, and tho anguish and anxiety
of friends and relations sre kept alive for months,
while in (ho latter osso the blow falls at first, bnl
naturally ho wears off* and is eventually forgotten.*
What Whiskey is Good fob.— The Lynchburg
Express stales that two sons of the late Hexekiah
Fuqua of Bedford (near Liberty, In that Slate,) to
gather with a little negro boy, a few days since, were
severely bitten by a snake.
The lads went out hunting and having started a
rabbit, run him into a hollow log, when one of the.
boys put hla hand in to haul him out. Very toon be
felt something bile, or as he thought, tho scratch of
tho hare. His brother tried it w’ilfa a like sensation, 1
■o ho declined repeating tbo operation. Then little
Cuff (bravo as Crosar) tries (t with like success. In
a few moments the hands of the parties commenced
swelling at an alarming rate, when medical aid wad*
immediately procured. Tbs physician dosed them!
wed with Hquor, until (ho patients became thorough
ty intoxicated, and after recording from the effect*
of the medicine the swelling subsided, end we are
happy to boar tho trio are now entirely convalesced!;
The log was split open, and to the surprise of all,’
a largo Copper-head Snake exhibited himself in
of his native ferocity. ’ '
DaowNiNd.—Pcrsoaa diving below water to briojf
up a body should know that they can no the body IP
they will keep their eyes open. A person hat •um»,
nier dtvod several limes for a body without effect J ar
lasi ho opened ills eyes whilst qnder water* and Mir
the body at a little distance. The consequence Wtj
& fine boy was recovered. In China* Where, they,
live much on and neat groat walcri,tho dhtlieahave
a Colibath lied about their necks, so that when they
full into the water, the natural bilnyahcy of the ha*,
man body, and the confined air in tbo.calibatb canto
them to float. Yankees might tacoeufully improve
on this idea, and thus prevent much lamentation,
over the loss of children. Ignorancoof,principle*,
of hydrostatics oaosca maoy dealha aonotlly bjt
drowning. . < * *
MANiFE<T*TiOrt > v RasrccT.—>Aa llioitoamer Sod'
Franklin passed tiu> 'own of Rising Sun, Indiana*'
on Thursday last, or .« way to Louisville, with (be
remains of llcnry Cloy on board, thirty one ypdnjf
ladies, representing the different Dialed of the Union,
stood in conspicuous view on the wharf, in front of
the crowd of citizens that had assembled. All, save
one. were dressed in virgin white, their heads cover
ed with black veils. Tho one occupied wag robad'ln'
deep mourning, and represented Kentucky, and 00*
copied the center of tho lino.
An ignorant follow, who was about Id get
resolved to make himself perfect in the response to,
the marriage service: but by mistake lie commiuea
(ho office of baptism for those of riper y ei|( **L*®
when Ilia elerf/rnao asked him Jo ibe shuns, 9 SViil
thou have this woman to be thy wedded wlfotla®
bridegroom answered in a very solemn 16bb,,“ a fe*
nounco them all." Tho astonished minister eald,” I.
think you are a foot" to which he replied, “All tbuf
I steadily believe."
Mu. Veiuoreen, being about to tnko tils fibHay*'
moon trip, after having aoaled his brido in the Cara/
goes forward end accoits the,/ir<mttn atfallowtt i
Naow, Mr. Inglneor, I want you to bo vory ( beer
ful, and go alow, cause you ace I've married,
and my wife and me aro goln* in Hub ’ore train.**
A Metaphor.—Poetry porralta her votaries to la*
dulgo in many metaphorical ideas, biit the latest we
have met with la positively the moat original i .
"With eyes of fire, majestically' ho . ,
And spoko divinely through'tils double barreled
nose.” . *• ■
DoMtaxio.—The last piece of niarilid Ibadlchce U
the following dialogue: 'Huabandi I don*l kbov?
whore that boy got nil bad temper—not from'mo—•
l*m euro.*
I ‘No,* *1 don’t perceive you bate lct\ any.*
Value o» Activity.— I The Now York ffuh.ihotf*
Hone an amoiiog occurrence that look place in
Brooklyn a fow day* ego, while eeilinf a ** there
oarron lit, that waa all akin and bones, *’ In the ahapo
of a horse; the auction was la front of the City Hall*
Tho highest bid ofierod only amounted to $lO, when
Constable Urady, anxious to 'show,the hanlmal (0
hadvanlage,* jumped in thp vehicle to which tbe
horse waa eltatched, and drove off;' while endeavor*
ing to 'got tho oritter to g’lang,* a llndh pm of ond
of the ailca oamo out, and tho horoo torri*
rifled at finding a wagon on three wheels behind him;
started off with unusual speed, shaking the poqt
constable up and down like a lot ofrusty nails rst*
liing in & bottle, and giVing'bita *a thump at every
jump,* until he felt perfectly scratchy al| over. After
considerable phoutlng and tiughter, the oaff. finally
stopped of his own accord,'when a purchaser
forward end took’film at $9O, activity having doubled
ila value. ' ' '
ito* S.