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Advertisements not marked with the number of inser tions desired, will be continued till forbid and charged ac vx)rding- to these terms. ~tlett aetxg. X AM NOT 11APPY. You think I have a happy heart Because a smile I wear, But none can tell the bitter grief That's daily gnawing there. '0: once I had a happy home, And friends and parents dear; But now they all are passed away, And left me wandering here. But yet I would not wish them back, In this lono world of care ; But rather would I leave this earth, And rise to meet them there. I, too, like them, am passing on, Death soon will seal my tate; Nor do I care how soon he comes, Nor mourn he stays so late. Nor do T heed, though frowning wealth May scorn• my form to see, 'hero they are soon I hope to rise, Where I am they must be. But I will strive my talent here To improve as God has given, That I may rise at last above, To share the joys of Heaven. 'THE 11107IPIEEIVS SOLILOQUY. My hope was all in thee, My own, my angel boy, I deem'd not, that sickness, Would thy fair form destroy Soon paleness o'er thy brow Its snow-white mantle spread, On thy sweet lips the glow Lay withered, pale, and dead. Oppressed with woes untold, To see thee fading there, lly heart grew chill and cold, It yielded to despair. And thou art gone. my child, Thou art in dust laid low. Those eyes I thought so mild Are closed on all below. Thou east the only one Left to my care and love, And now. even thou art gone— Thy spirit dwells above. Nistgrian. HISTORICAL EXTRACTS DEATH OF JLLIUS C.X,5..111 The morning of the Ides of March, the clay on which the conspiracy was to be execu ted, arrived, and there was yet no suspieien. The conspirators had already been together at the house of one of the pmetors. Cassius was to present his son that morning to the people, with the ceremony usual in assuming the habit of manhood ; and he was upon this account, to be attended by his friends into the place of assembly. lie was afterwards, together with Brutus in their capacity of magistrate, employed as usual, in giving judgment on the causes that were brought be fore them. As they sat in the prretor's chair, they received intimation that Ccesar, having been disposed over night, was not to be abroad. ; and that ho had commissioned Antony, in his name, to adjourn the senate to another Ilay. Upon this report, they suspected a dis covery ; and while they were deliberating what should be done, Popilius Lamas, a sen ator whom they had not entrusted with their design, whispered them as -he passed, " I pray that God may prosper what you have in view. Above all things dispatch." Their suspicions of a discovery being thus still fur ther confirmed, the intention soon after ap peared to be public. An acquaintedce told Casca, "You have concealed this business from me, but Brutus told me of it." They were struck with surprise ; but Brutus pres 4ntly recollected that he had mentioned to this person no more than Casca's intention of standing for nedile, and that the words which he spoke probably referred only to that busi ness ; they accordingly determined to wait the issue of these alarms. In the meantime Caesar, at the persuasion of Decimus Brutus, though once determined to remain at home, had changed his mind, -and was already in the streets, being carried to the senate in his litter. Soon after he had left his own house, a slave came thither in haste, desired protection, and said he had a secret to impart. He had probably over heard the conspirators, or had observed that they were armed ; but not being aware how pressing the time was, he suffered himself to be detained till Cwsar's return. Others, probably, had observed circumstances which led to a discovery of the plot, and Cxsar had a.-billet to this effect, given to him as he pass ed in the streets ; he was entreated by the person who gave it instantly to read it, and ,he endeavored to do so, but was prevented by the multitudes who crowded around him with numberless applications ; and he still carried this paper in . his hand when he entered the senate. Brutus and most of the conspirators had taken their places a little while before the ar rival of Cm.sar, and continued to be alarmed by many circumstances which tended to shake their resolution. Porcia, in the same mo ments, being in great agitation, exposed her self to public notice. She listened with anx iety to every noise in the streets; she de spatched without any pretence of business, continual messages towards the place where the senate was assembled ; she asked every person who came from that quarter if they observed what her husband was doing. Her spirit at last sunk under the effect of such violent emotions ; she fainted away, and was carried for dead into her apartment. A mes.- sage came to Brutus in the senate with this account. He was much affected, but kept his place. Popilius Lmnas, who a little be fore seemed, from the expression he had dropped, to have got notice of their design, appeared to be in earnest conversation with Cmsar, as he lighted from his carriage. This left the conspirators no longer in doubt that they were discovered; and they made signs to each other, that he would be better to die by their ovru bands than to fall in the hands of their enemy. But they saw cf a sudden the countenance of Lamas change into a smile, and perceived that his conversation with Cmsar could not relate to such a busi ness as theirs. 093SaIff3 chair of state had been placed near to the pedestal of Pompey's statue. Nnm- ....;1 50 WILLIAM LEWIS, VOL. XIII. bers of the conspirators had seated them selves around it. Trebonius, under pretence of business, had taken Antony at the side of the entrance of the theatre. Cimber, who, with others of the conspirators, met Cmsar in the portico, presented him a petition in favor of his brother, who had been excepted from the late indemnity ; and in urging the prayer of this petition, attended the dictator to his place. Having there received a denial from Ccesar, uttered with some expressions of im patience at being so much importuned, he took hold of his robe, as if to impress the en treaty. Xall, said Cmsar, this is violence.— While he spoke these words, Cimber flung back the gown from his shoulders ; and this being the signal agreed upon, called out to strike. Casca aimed the first blow. Cmsar started from his place, in the first moment of surprise, pushed Cimber with one arm, and laid hold of Casca with the other. But he soon perceived that resistance was vain ; and while the swords of the conspirators clashed with each other, in their way to his body, he wrapped himself up in his gown and fell without any further struggle. It was observ ed, in the superstition of the times, that in falling, the blood which sprung from his wounds sprinkled the pedestal of Pompey's statue. And thus having employed the greatest abilities to subdue his fellow-citizens, with whom it would have been a much greater honor to have been able to live on terms of equality, he fell in the height of his security, a sacrifice to their just indignation ; a strik ing example of what the arrogant have to fear in trifling with the feelings of a free peo ple, and at the same time a lesson of jeal ousy and of cruelty to tyrants, or an admo nition not to spare, in the exercise of their power, those whom they may have insulted by usurping it. When the body lay breathless on the ground, Cassus called out, that there lay the worst of men. T.lrutus called upon the senate to judge of the transaction which had passed before them, and was proceeding to state the motives of those who were concerned in it, when the members, who had for a moment stood in silent amazement, rose on a sudden, and be gan to separate in great consternation. All those who had come to the senate in the train of Caesar, his lictors, the ordinary officers of state, citizens, and foreigners, with many servants and dependants of every sort, had been instantly seized with a panic ; and as if the swords of the conspirators were drawn against themselves, had already rushed into the streets, and carried terror and confusion wherever they went. The senators themselves now followed. No man had presence of mind to give any account of what had happened, but aepcated the cry that was usual on great alarms, for all persons to withdraw, and to shut up their habitations and shops. This cry was communicated from one to another iii the streets. The people, imagining that a general massacre was somewhere begun, shut up, and barred all their doors as in the dead of night, and every one prepared to de fend his own habitation. EE2EI Antony, upon the first alarm, had changed his dress, and retired to a place of safety.— Ile believed that the conspirators must have intended to take his life, together with that of Ca sar ; and he fled in the apprehension of being instantly pursued. Lipidus repaired to the suburbs, where the legion he commanded was quartered ; and uncertain whether Cmsar's death was the act of the whole senate, or of a private party, awaited fur an explanation, or an order from the surviving consul, to determine in what manner he should act. In these circumstan ces a general pause, and an interval of sus pense and silence took place over the whole city. Cassius after the route of his division, with a few who had adhered to him, had halted on an eminence, and sent Titinius to the right, with orders to learn the particulars of the day on that side. This officer, while yet in sight, was met by a party of horsemen emerg ing from the clouds of dust on the plain.— ::This party had been sent by Brutus to learn the situation of his friends on the left: but Cassius supposing them to bo enemies, and believing that Titinius, whom he saw sur rounded by them, was taken, he instantly, with the precipitant despair, which, on other occasions, had proved so fatal to the cause of the republic, presented his breast to a slave to whom he had allotcd, in case of any urgent extremity, the office of putting an end to his life. Titinius, upon his return, imputing this fatal calamity to his 'own neglect in not trying sooner to undeceive his general by proper signals, killed himself, and fell upon the body of his friend. Brutus soon after ar rived at the same place, and seeing the body of Cassius, shed tears of vexation and sorrow over the effects of an action so rash and pre cipitate, and which deprived the republic and himself, in this extremity, of so able and so necessary a support. This, he said, is the last of the romance. As, from the signal now made, it appeared to Brutus and the small company who atten ded him, that the camp was still in posses sion of their own people, they thought of making their way thither, but recollecting that a greater part of the army were dispersed, they doubted whether the lines could be de fended until they could reach them, or even if they should be maintained so long, wheth-; er they could furnish any safe retreat. While they reasoned in this manner, one of their number who went to the brook, returned with the alarm that the enemy were upon the op posite bank; and saying, with some agitation, "We must fly." "Yes," replied Brutus, "but with our hands, not with our feet." He was then said to have repeated, from some poet, a tragic exclamation in the character of Her cules: "0 Virtue! I thought thee a substance, but find thee no more than an empty name, or the slave of Fortune." The vulgar in their traditions, willingly lend' their own thoughts to eminent men in distress; those of Brutus are expressed in his letter to .Atticus: "I have done my part, and wait for the issue, in which death or freedom is to follow." If he had ever thought that a mere honorable DEATII Or CASSIUS. DEATH OF BRUTUS intention, was to insure him success, it is not surprising he was not sooner undeceived.— Being now to end his life, and taking his leave of the company then present, one by one, he said aloud, "That he was happy in never having been betrayed by any one he had trusted as a friend:" Some of them, to whom he afterwards whispered apart were observed to burst into tears; and it appeared that he requested their assistance in killing himself ; for he soon after executed this pur pose, in company with one Strato and some others, whom he had taken aside. This catastrophe, as usual, set the imagi nations of men to work ; and many prodigies and presages were believed to have preceded it. A spectre, it was said, had presented it self in the night to Brutus, when he was about to pass the Hellespont, told him it was his evil genius, and was to meet him again at Philippi ; that here it accordingly again appeared on the eve of the late action. Brutus was then about 37 or 40 years of age. Next to Cato, he, of all the Romans, was supposed to have acted from the purest motives of public virtue. Achillas, with a few of his attendants, came on board with a small boat, delivered a message from Ptolemy, inviting Pompey to land. In the meantime, some Egyptian gal leys, with an intention to secure him, drew near to his ship; and the whole army with the King at their head, were drawn out on the shore to receive him. The size of the boat, and the appearance of the equipage which came on this errand, seemed dispro portioned to the rank of Pompey; and Achil- Las made an apology, alleging that deeper vessels could not go near enough to land him on that shallow part of the coast. Pompey's friends endeavored to dissuade him from ac cepting of au invitation so improperly deliv ered ; but he answered by quoting two lines from Sophocles, which implies, that whoever visits a Icing, - though he arrive a free man, must become his slave. Two of his servants went before him into the boat to receive their master; and with this attendance he put off from the ship. His wife, Cornelia, and Sextus, the young est of his sons, with some other friends, re mained upon deck, sufficiently humbled by the preceding strokes of fortune, (defeat at Pharsalia,) anxious for the future, and tremb ling under the expectations of a scene which was acting before them. Soon after the barge had left the ship, Pompey looking behind him, observed among the Egyptian soldier a person whose countenance he recollected, and said to him—" Surely, fellow soldier, you and I have served somewhere together."— While he turned to speak these words, Achil las beckoned to the other soldiers, who, un derstanding to put the Roman general to death, struck him with their swords. Pom pey was so much prepared for this event, that he perceived the whole of his situation at once, and sunk without making any struggle, or uttering one word. This was done in the presence of the king of Egypt and of his army, who were ranged on a kind of amphi theatre, formed by the shore. The vessel in which the unhappy Cornelia, with her fami ly, was left, and the little squadron which attended it, as if they had received a signal to depart, cut their cables and fled. Thus died Pompey, who, for about thirty years, enjoyed the reputation of the first cap tain of the age. The title of great, originally no more than a casual expression of regard from Sylla, continued, in the manner of the Romans, to be given him as a mark of esteem, and a name of distinction. He attained to more consideration, and enjoyed it longer than any Roman citizen ; and was supplanted at last, because for many years of his life, be thought himself too high to be rivalled, and too secure to be shaken in his place. His last defeat, and the total ruin which ensued upon it, wasthe consequence of an unweening confidence, which left him altogether unpre pared for the first untoward event. The im pression of his character, even after that event, was still so strong in the minds of his ene mies, that Calsar overlooked all the other re mains of the vanquished party to pursue their leader. Marcus Cicero having got safe to Asturn, and with a fair wind arrived at Circii. When the vessel was again about to sail, his mind wavered, he flattered himself that matters might yet take a more favorable turn ; he landed, and traveled about twelve miles on his way to Rome; but his resolution again failed him, and he once more returned towards the sea. Being arrived on the coast, he still hesitated, remained on shore, and passed the night in agonies of sorrow, which were in terrupted oni, • by momentary starts or indig nation and rage. Under these emotions, he sometimes solaced himself with a prospect of returning to Rome in disguise, of killing him self in the presence of Octavius, and of stain ing the person of that young traitor with the blood of a man, whom he had so ungrateful ly and so vilely betrayed. Even this appear ed to his frantic imagination some degree of revenge ; but the fear of being discovered be fore he could execute his purpose, the pros pect of the tortures and indignities he was likely to suffer, deterred him from the design; and being unable to take any resolution what ever, he committed himself to his attendants, was carried on board of a vessel, and steered for Capua. Near to this place, having an other villa on the shore, he was again landed, and being fatigued with the motion of the sea, went to rest ; but his servants, according to the superstition of the times, being dis turbed with prodigies and unfavorable presa ges, or rather being sensible of their master's danger, after a little repose awaked him from his sleep, forced him into his litter, and has tened again to embark. Soon after they were gone, Popilius, Dmnas, a tribune of the legions, and Ilerennius, a centurion, with a party who had been for some days in search of this prey, arrived at the villa. Popilius had received particular obligations from Cice ro, having been defended by him when tried upon a criminal accusation ; but these were times, in which bad men could make a merit of ingratitude to their former benefactors, HUNTINGDON, PA., JULY 8, 1857. DEATII OP POMPEY. DEATII or CICERO -PERSEVERE.-- when it served to ingratiate them with those in power. This officer, with his party, finding the gates of the court and. the passages of the villa shut, burst them open ; but missing the person they sought for, and suspecting he must have taken his flight again to the sea, they pursued through an avenue that led to the shore, and came in sight of Cicero's lit ter, before he had left the walks of his own garden. On the appearance of a military party, Cicero perceived the end of his labors, order ed the bearers of his litter to halt, and hav ing been hitherto, while there were any hopes of .escape, distressed chiefly by the perplexity and indecision of his own mind, he became, as soon as his fate appeared. to be certain, determined and calm. In this situation, he was observed to stroke his chin with his left hand, a gesture for which he was remarka ble in his moments of thoughtfulness, and when least disturbed. Upon the approach of the party, lie put his head from the litter, and fixed his eyes upon the tribune with great composure. The countenance of a man so well known to every Roman, now worn out by fatigue and dejection, and disfigured by the neglect of the usual attention to his per son, made a moving spectacle, even to those who came to assist in his murder. They hur ried away, while the assassin performed his office and severed the head from his body. Thus perished Marcus Tullius Cicero, in the sixty-fourth year of his age. eittertsting . Rtistettim. These touching words appeal to everyheart, and find a corresponding echo in every soul. To be loved, to be remembered by those we hold dear is sweet. 0, the sad reflection that with the departing years our memory will fade from the hearts we had hoped to cherish forever. To feel that when the green grass shall wave over our lowly bed, and the white mar ble gleam coldly above to mark the spot, fond hearts will grow cold, and the once los ing friends pass by, pausing not to drop a tear, or breathe one sigh of regret for the de parted. 'Tis a solemn thought, and one that calls up the recollections of by-gone days.— But 'tis better far to close the weary eyes, and repose the aching brow in death, and lie (low'. beneath the. pure snow or fragrant flowers, bedewed even for a season with tears of sorrow, than to know that while we live our image is effaced from the memory of once fond hearts, that before the lamp of life is gone out forever, we are dead to a world of hope, love and joy. Remember me, even when the grave has closed over all that re mained of the poor frail worm of immor tality,; and sometimes when life is all bright and joyous, give one passing thought to the blest sleeper, resting so sweetly front all life's turmoil and cares. Remember me ! How sadly sweet these words reverberate in the heart, haunting us ever with its soft soothing melody, when the tried and cher ished friends of youth press upon the brow the farewell kiss. Often will these sweet words come over the heart like the echo of some soul-subdu ing music, softening down the asperities of our natures, filling the soul with lung forgot ten strains. I have seen the cherished idol of the house hold close his eyes in death, leaving the world all dark to me, and now the snows of many winters have lain lightly upon his loved tomb, and sweet flowers have lifted their meek heads above his breast, yet, his last words of love and counsel arc over pres ent with me, and my sorrow, mellowed by time as it is, has made his grave a hallowed spot. 0, 'tis a pleasing memory, though fraught with much of childish grief, the memory of the dear, light-hearted friends of childhood, and of their unfeigned grief at parting years ago, when I was a merry happy child. But alas I it is all past, and we shall never meet again ; but Fond memory often Urines the hours. When life was radiant with youth's flowers Remember me ! Yes, tho' our paths in life may be widely separated, and sorrows may fall heavily on my defenceless head, making still fainter the weary heart, and blighting the budding flowers of hope, then when surrounded by home and friends, with no clouds obscuring the bright heavens and beautiful sunshine from life's journey, some times remember me. And when the heavens smile above me, and roses instead of thorns adorn my path way, I will look up in thanksgiving and prayer to oar Father, for the constant friends he has given, and bless Him, that in the darkest hour He has remembered me. ECONOMY.—Economy is one of throe sis ters; of whom the other and less reputable two are Avarice and Prodigality. She alone keeps the safe and straight path, while Ava rice sneers at her as profuse, and Prodigality scorns her as penurious. To the poor she is indispensable ; to those of moderato means she is found the representative of wisdom; and although some moralist has said, that at the hearth of the opulent Economy takes the form of a vice, she is perhaps as great a vir tue there as she is elsewhere. Iler very name signifies the law or rule of a house, and her presence is as much required in the palace as in tho cottage. The honest man who lives within his income, and owes no man anything, is your only true king.— Economy is an excellent virtue, no doubt; but like all other virtues, it must be applied with prudence, or it will turn into a folly or a vice. In the olden time there were sump tuary laws, which, while they attached a penalty to extravagance, set a fine on the man who let a year pass without asking a friend to dinner.—Athenamtnt. rtia..Beauty often fades away, but mod esty never decays. REMEMBER ME BY ELIZABETH J. COLE Editor and Proprietor. Thank God for a soul which can drink in its harmonics. The pulse leaps wildly to the stirring numbers, which, like the foot falls of armed men, awaken the fiery impulses of the slumbering heart. Or its low wail is answer ed by sobs, and the eloquence of its plaintive sadness, with tears. The bugle and the drumbeat stir the blood like red lightning in the veins. If there is influence which would make the timid heart like iron, and drive it madly to battle, it is that of martial music. Often in childhood have we watched the columns of soldiery, and found a tear upon the cheek at the emotion stirred by the tossing plume, the flaunting banners, and the drumbeat pulsing regularly through the whole mass like one common footfall upon the beaten sward, sending the thoughts surging through the soul. And yet, alas! that music should be made the mighty stimulus which drives host against host in the battle shock. 1 We once stood„l?y the side of a friend in the great proccOn which followed one hun dred thousand'pVtitions up to the State Cap itol at Albany, demanding the Maine Law.— As the dense mass of people, like a mighty monster moved by one heart, wound through the city and lapped around the very Capi tol itself, the emotions swelled to the throat. The music of the bands rose and fell on the wind, and the ground seemed to shake under the tread of the people. "Glory!" ejaculated a friend by the side of us, "I could march to the Mississippi to that music, and back again without eating or sleeping." lie was not the only one who was - that hour chafing under the wild ecstacy of music. A few moments since, a shadow—one of those which will drift without warning into every sky—lay gloomy upon our heart. But it vanished as quickly as it came ! A friend touches the guitar, and the first waves of a touching melody, filled the world and heart with sunshine. The chafing spirit is soothed and lulled, and the gentleness of childhood steals in where the unworn will was sullenly fretting in the worn frame. The soul rises on the tide of a new emotion like a freed bird, and the melodies there garnered, gush up and chime out with the airs of the shell. A sum mer sky is now above us. How much of holy music there is in the chi ming of church bells! Tremulous with sil very sweetness, they rise and fall upon the still Sabbath air, stealing along until, like the faint sounds of a waterfall, they drop down into the heart where it is ever moist with tears. Napoleon wept as he listened to the chim ing of the distant cathedral bells of Barges. There were places in his heart which had not been burned oT•er by the meteor blaze of am bition. The echoes of chimes heard in child hood were stirred by the distant peal, and for the moment, he forgot his dream of glory and gazed tearfully back.—Caiptga Chic,/: DYING Cox.rEssioNs.—The Toledo Blade, remarking upon the recent execution of Re turn J. M. Ward. in that city, quotes the re mark of Dr. Bond, an eminent physician of Baltimore, who said that fifty years' experi ence at the bedsides of the sick and dying had taught him that the most deceptive mo ments of a man's whole life are those in which he lingers on the very boundary between life and death; and the words then spoken reflect the prevailing motives of their lives; and mor alizes thereon as follows : "People are very apt to think, when a criminal denies his guilt on the gallows, in view of such awful circumstances, that he must be innocent. But the history of crim inal law shows that nothing is more errone ous than such an opinion; and the dying speech of Ward, in contrast with his written confession, goes still further to show how lit tle dependence can be placed on a man whose life is one everlasting duplicity. If Ward told the truth on the scaffold, he lied repeat edly before. If he told the truth in his confes sion he lied on the scaffold. Whichever di lemma we take, the' result will go to show that the view of certain death does not make men honest." TUE PURCIIASE or MOUNT VERNON.—St. Louis, (Mo. ' ) has taken the lead in inaugu rating the 4th of July movement in behalf of the Mount Vernon purchase. On the com ing celebration there, a grand demonstration will be made, in which Senator Douglas, "the little giant," and ex-Senator ilannegan, will occupy prominent positions as orators of the day and the occasion. A similar patri otic and filial demonstration is in preparation at the South Carolina Citadel Academy, un der the auspices of the instructors. The young lads there design to enrol themselves as "Knights of the Southern Matron," in the Order of Mount Vernon. Georgia has also taken decisive action in the premises, and the men of Augusta, in obedience to the be hests of "accomplished Eve," have laid the free will offering of patriot gratitude on the shrine of Washington. THE MOTTLER.----DOSpiSe not thy mother when she is old. Age may wear and waste a mother's beauty, strength, limbs, senses, and estate ; but her relation as a mother is as the sun when it goeth forth in its might, for it is always in the meridian, and know eth no evening. The person may be gray headed, but her motherly relation is ever in its bloom, It may be autumn, yes, winter, but with the mother as mother, it is always spring. Alas, how lit:tle do we appreciate a mother's tenderness while living ! How heedless are we in youth of all her anxieties and kindness ! But when she is dead and gone—when the cares and coldness of the world come withering to our heart—when we experience how hard it is to find true sympathy—how few love us for ourselves— how few will befriend us in misfortune—then it is that we think of the mother we have lost. According to the most recent French style for ladies' dresses, it will take twenty two yards of anything hereafter to make any thing like a pattern. Who is .going to be such a fool as to get married at this rate? NO, 3. Music. A WORD TO I3ors.—Boys, what'company do you keep? what company do you shun?— We are known by the company we keep. A boy that keeps bad company is sure to be bad. 1. Those who ridicule parents or disobey their commands. 2. Those who profane the Sabbath, orseoff at religion. 3. Those who use profane or filthy lan- gunge. :, 4. Those who are unfaithful, play truant or waste their time in idleness. 5. Those who are of a quarrelsome tem- per. 6. Those who are addicted to lying and stealing. 7. Those who take pleasure in torturing animals and insects. S. Those who loaf around grog-shops; smoke and drink whiskey. A neighbor related to us, the other day, an instance of feline affection, or good will, that deserves to be recorded among the passing events of the day. There is about the house, a favorite dog, who has become so old and decrepit as to be in a measure una ble to provide for his daily wants. A cat, also about the premises, has become so much attached to him, that when, a few days since, her usual allowance of meat was given to her, she deliberately took the meat in her mouth, went to where the dog was lying, dropped it at his nose and walked off as though she had performed nothing more than her duty; and, this is not an isolated instance of her care for her canine cousin, but she may be seen almost daily evincing her friend ly care to her friend, by her acts of kindness. The Niles Enquirer records the good luck of a citizen of that village, who, while bath ing in the river, discovered, after an indus trious scrub" of his person of about five minutes, a pair of drawers which he had lost two years before. A little boy, five years old, while writhing under the tortures of the ague, was told by his mother to rise up and take a powder she had prepared for him. " Powder 1 powder I" said he, raising him self on one elbow, and putting on a rogueish smile, "Mother, I ain't a gun !" "I say, friend, is there nothing to shoot about here?" asked Kentucky sportsman of a little boy. "Wall, nothin' just about here, stranger, but the schoolmaster is down the hill yonder-- you might pop him over." A little boy once said to his grandmoth er: "Grandmother, I hope you will dio first." Why so, my child?" "Because I can stand trouble better than you can." This hit from an affectionate and bravo boy occasioned great laughter. The Chinese think that the soul of a poet passes into a grasshopper, because it sings till it starves. ra=-Puzzrn.—A lady being asked by a gen tleman to join in the bonds of matrimony with him, wrote the word. "STRIPES," stating at the time that the letters making up the word stripes, could be changed so as to make an answer to his question. Who can give the answer? "You are from the country, are you not, sir?" said a dandy clerk, in a book store,to a handsomely dressed quaker, who had given' him some trouble. "Well, hero is an essay on the rearing of calves." ",That," said Aminailab, as he turned to leave the store, thee had better present to thy mother." Woman, to a little boy.— your folks all well !" Little boy.—" Yes, ma'am, all but Sally Ann." Woman.—' ber?" "Why, what's the matter with Little boy.—" 0 nothing particular only she had the hoopin' cough once, and she ain't never got over it. The cough haint of any account now, but she has the hoop most des per'te." That was a wise nigger who, in speaking of the happiness of married peo ple, said, " .Dat ar 'pend altogedder how dey enjoy demselbs 1" Blessed are they who are afraid of thunder —for - they shall hesitate about getting married and keep away from political meetings. A Wiltshire dame, the mothor of a large family, was once asked the number of her children, "La, me!" she replied, rocking to and fro, "I've got fourteen, mostly boys and pirls• V. - a-The Home Journal is responsible for the latest definition of beauty—that which has puzzled the brain of the wisest philosophers. It says:—" Beauty, dear reader, is the 2roman :you lore—whatever sho may be to oth ers." Irish lady wrote to her lover, beg ging him to send her some money. She added by way of postscript, "I am so asham ed of the request I have made in this let ter, that I sent after the post-rider to get it back, but the servant could not overtake him." xI.A woman in one of the towns of New Hampshire who had been ill used by her hus band on finding him asleep one day, quiet sewed him up in the bed clothes, and then gave him a tremendous thrashing 11 shrewd old gentleman once said to' his daughter, "Be sure, my dear, that you never marry a poor man : but remember, the poorest man in the world, is the one that has money and nothing else..." There is much in this and we. commend it to the ladies. rt..-. Boss, I want twenty five cents. Twenty-five cents! How soon do you want it, Jake? Next Tuesday. As soon as that? You can't have it, I have' told you often that -when you was in want of so large a sum of money you must give me at least four weeks notice. WANTED—By an ancient maiden lady--- "A local habitation and a name." The real estate she is not particular about, so that the title is good . . The name she wishes to hand down to posterity. Apply to the above before taken. 110,,..A farmer near 13ingharripton; New . York State, last year, in order to convince a neighbor of the usefulnew of birds, shot a Mellon* bird in his wheat field; opened its craw, and found in it two hundred weevils; and but four grains the weevils had bur= rowed. Partin ;ton says she has noticed that whether flour was dear or cheap, she in-: variably had to pay the same money for a half dollar's worth. No " CI ANGE."-A sailor, looking serious in a church, in New York, was asked by a minister if he felt any change. " Not .ss cent," said Jack. "Jimmy are
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers