about:
The more I ponder on Italy's
ithe Confederate who was released
the surrender.
mined to die on southern soil
ing, early, the hired
man heard suspicious
sounds in the loft and
ran for reinforcements.
tive's refuge was sur-
rounded by stalwart,
armed men. The farm-
er's six-foot son lev-
eled a cocked musket.
“Come out of thar,
whoever you be,” he
bellowed. “Consarn
your hide, we got you.”
The southerner ralsed a white face.
*Yas,” he sald, wanly, “and one h—l
of a git you got.”
» » »
His Next Movie.
E'RE starting a new picture, and
I am teamed up with Slim Sum-
merville, 6 feet 6 of pure comedy, and
little Jane Withers—for her age, the
greatest scene-stealer In the business.
It's as though Little Boy Blue were
eandwiched in between Jesse James
and Calamity Jane. Well, as I go
down for the third time I'll still be
gurgling feebly, so give me credit,
please, as an earnest gurgler.
They call our picture “Public Nuls-
ance Number 1,” but a movie is like
&n Indian—starts out with a name snd
winds up with anyone of a half-dozen.
I once knew a Blackfoot who was first
one thing, then another, and the best
he could do for himself in his old age
was to be known as Chief Many Tail
Feathers Golng Over the Hill
* * -
Pranks of Zioncheck.
HE papers seemed so barren—not
a single front page story about
Representative Zioncheck, Washing-
ton’s No. 1 Boy Scout. Life, Indeed,
is empty on a day whose low descend-
ing sun sees no gay deed done, no
headline won by the nation's official
problem child.
He may have started off at the foot
of the ladder, alphabetically speaking,
but his startled constituents can't com-
plain that the gallant lad stayed there.
Either he's getting pinched or getting
Jailed or getting married or getting his
pen in hand to tell the President how
to run the country, or getting ready to
polish off some fellow-statesman of the
house, or just getting about.
And hasn't he put the throbbing
pulse Into the Congressional Record?
It reads now sometimes as the old
Police Gazette used to.
» - ®
Irvin 8. Cobb
Rules for Olympics,
S I understand it—and somebody
correct me, please, if I'm wrong—
the rules for the forthcoming Olymple
Games In Berlin have been so revised
that it will be quite all right for any
of our Jewish athletes to take part
Just so they don't win.
I'm wondering, though, about what
may happen when the American team
turns up over there with a whole bateh
of negro foot-racers In the outfit. It's
going to be awfully hard to convince
a Prussian crowd that they're merely
medium-to-well-done Nordie-Cancasian
stock browned in the pan, so to speak.
It so happens that our fastest run-
ners are all colored boys. Perhaps ‘tis
Just as well. They may have to keep
right on running,
* * *
Improvement in Influenza.
N RESPONSE to large numbers who
wrote or wired, I would state that
either I'm getting over my influenza,
or maybe I'm just getting used to it.
Its latest whimsical notion was to set-
tle In both ears, and now should it
thunder, a rare occurrence out here,
in order for me to get the benefit of
the phenomenon, It'll have to thunder
again—and louder, However, being
temporarily deaf has its advantages:
I don’t hear the dull things other peo-
ple say, but can still enjoy the bright
things 1 say myself,
As will be noted, I'm back from
Palm Springs, where I cooked In the
desert sunshine until all I needed to do
before being served was to drape a
sprig of watercress across my brow
and thicken the gravy with a little
brown flour. Driving In, 1 kept tying
took my face for a stop signal,
Should 1 relapse I'm going to try to
throw myself into the epizootic. That's
a horse disease, but I've been as sick
a horse to live through it—and, apy.
how, 1 know a good horse doctor,
IRVIN 8. COBB.
Copyright —WNU Bervice,
Ouch
’ “You say yours is the perf hus-
band?” exclaimed the first woman,
“Yes,” retorted the other, “but my
definition of a husband Is ‘a man who
tak¥s his wife for granted, thinks
hating meals on time one of the most
fmportant things In the world, won-
ders why she complains about pleking
up after him and can’t be made to un-
derstand It actually takes money for
a woman to keep looking present.
able."—Clncinnati Enquirer,
CHHNTA
Washington, D. C.—WNU Service,
three widely separated seas:
the Great Lakes and the St. Lawrence
to the Atlantic. And no other state
has as many lakes within its borders.
There are more than 10,000 of them.
The map of the state reveals that
Minnesota 1s cut Into two vast tri-
angles by a diagonal line running from
the northeast corner (where the Red
river flows out northward) down to
the southeast corner (where the Mis-
sissippl flows out southward). Imagine
the upper triangle painted green, and
the lower one painted yellow, and pres-
to! you have the state roughly divided
Into its natural forest and prairie parts.
The green triangle, before the lum-
bermen came, was in general a huge
pine forest, and begins to be so again.
The yellow triangle, before the farmer
came, was a grassland “like the bil-
lows of a great sea, majestic and lim-
itless”; now it is fields, with wind-
breaks of planted trees to shelter the
red barns and white farmhouses,
The diagonal line that divides these
triangles has its significance, too. It
marks the chief trade route through
the state and also a wandering barrier
of declduous woods, now carved up
to make way for farms and citles,
which everywhere separates the pine-
lands from the prairies,
Broader toward the South where it
attaches to the deciduous woods of
Wisconsin, It dwindles to a thin secat-
tering of stunted trees toward the
north-——the final outpost of the hard-
wood forest of eastern America.
ground. At the outer corner of
Coteau des Prairies just crosses, di-
viding the Missour! from the Missis.
sipp! basins with Its Immense gradual
swell. In the outer corner of the green
triangle, the “Arrowhead Country”
above Lake Superior, are the Sawteeth
choked in forest,
Climate Is “Continental ™
The climate of this pair of triangles
Is a grief to those who resent sur.
prises. It Is “continental” in the most
emphatic sense. Temperatures range
In a milde year through 120 degrees:
in a year with a real wallop to it, as
high as 165. In consequence, the na-
tive of outdoor habits must maintain
& wardrobe that Includes everything
from the shortest of swimming shorts
to the longest of long woolena
Lake Superior, it is true, tends to
temper the winds of the region around
it, but not to the shorn lamb; no, no.
Thanks to the proximity of that deep
reservoir of pure Icewater, a grouchy
visitor has been heard to complain
that the coldest winter he ever spent
was one summer in Duluth!
Nor are the blessings of ample rain.
fall to be taken for granted. Of late
years the yellow triangle, commonly
less ralny and much less snowy than
the green, has involuntarily tried the
experiment of getting along with next
to no moisture at all. In fact, Minne-
sota has weather to please all tastes,
in strong doses which, as a rule, stimu-
late rather than kill
The Nineteenth century marked an
immense change In Minnesota, The
white man arrived In numbers to es-
tablish himself in a country where it
was easler to make a living than in the
one he had come from. This was not
a very noble purpose in one way, and
it led to many Injustices to the exist.
ing inhabitants, hoth men and animals,
Yet the annals of the ploneer In.
vasion reveal, too, a deep longing In
those people for the good life, for they
were certainly ready to undergo dis-
comforts that were sordid and hard
ships that were killing in thelr high
hopes for the future in a new land.
There was much to be done, for the
nature to suit his own views. But en-
ergy was the characteristic of the age.
With rifle, ax, and plow, and later with
money, miracles were wrought,
its Animal Population,
. For one thing, the status of the na.
tive animals was drastically changed.
In the yellow triangle, marvelously fer.
tile for wheat, the buffalo, antelope,
and coyote were agricultural impos
sibilities, The first two were extermi.
nated ; the remnants of the coyote tribe
retreated to the green triangle, altered
their habits to sult a woods environ.
ment, and became “brush wolves”
Tha deer, whose natural home was
the diagonal woods barrier, also re.
treated Into the green triangle. The
lumberjack, by hewing down the great
er part of the pine there, did the deer
a favor, for the birch and aspen that
Se,
a Bridge Approach,
supplanted It made a home to thelr
Uking; in fact, in it they thrive and
multiply.
Though one would not slight the
lusclous meadows, vast potato flelds,
and other agricluture of the green tri-
angle, It has In general been rebel-
lious in the farmer's hands and so
remains essentially a forest and game
refuge to this day.
True, the trapper and sportsman
have drastically diminished the num-
bers of Its natural citizens, such as
the timber wolf, otter, fisher, and lynx,
But the beaver still builds his dams
there; the black bear may be spled,
fishing with his paws when the fish
run in the streams; the porcupine In
large numbers yet gnaws the jack pine
bark, and travels a path which, wind.
Ing through the snowy groves, looks
as neat and regular as If some one
had rolled a heavy truck tire there.
And the snowshoe rabbit, whose favor-
ite diet is the pine seedlings set out
by government foresters, travels the
winter drifts on his padded legs.
The American elk, or wapltl, 18 ex-
tinct in Minnesota. The caribou is
almost so; a herd Is sometimes seen
In the remote fastnesses of the great
swamp of Beltram! county, north of
Red lake. But the moose, in the Ar-
rowhead country, survives in falr num-
bers,
Canoe travelers often see the noble
monster at lunch In some lake,
body submerged for protection against
the flies. his lips curling around the
water lily shoots that make a dainty
bot-weather salad for this giant among
American mammals. But he is wisely
a shy animal.
Lots of Good Fishing.
Fish and fowl likewise have had to
adjust themselves to their new neigh.
bor, the white man.
A game-fish paradise has a way of
retreating when the sportsman finds
it. Thus the greedy now must go to
the border lakes to catch a boatload
of pike in an afternoon. But this does
not mean that there is not famous fish.
ing elsewhere,
The muskellunge of such lakes as
Mantrap, or the fighting small-mouth
bass of White Earth, and the many
his
tall fish stories annually, which, In
spite of the low repute of fish stories,
are essentially true. Certainly they
reflect justly the fun that anclent
sport provides,
And the Minnesota citizen almost
anywhere may go out after supper
and book a black bass or a mess of
crapples, or, in not more than a day's
drive, reach lakes In whose 200-foot
depths the noble lake trout can be
Of the original game-bird inhabl.
tants of the state only the grouse can
now be called abundant, and its abun-
dance wanes and waxes In cycles.
This ruffed grouse Is the characteristic
bird of the green triangle. Tame,
richly speckled and ruffed, It provides
a voice for the wilderness in the ac
celerating thud of its wings drumming
on some hollow log, a mysterious music
that the forest muffies as if to hold
secret.
Thanks to Ill-considered drainage
and the advance of the farmer, the
wild duck’s breeding grounds In Min.
nesota are largely lost to it; the black
V's of ita spring flight go for the most
part beyond the border into Canada.
Nor has the prairie chicken been very
clever in adapting itself to life on the
farm and as a target,
But the Introduction of a partly
parasitic bird, the ring-necked pheas-
serving as his autumn target, has
tically colored bird, looking fitter to
the prairie sunflowers, nevertheless has
made Itself completely at home in the
yellow triangle. Its volce has become
that area's voice, the harsh double
Another bird, too tough and clever
nesota's lakes. This is the loon, whose
melancholy cry on some black lake
shaggy with overhanging pines, when
the moon sets and the winds are down,
speaks In the accents of truly great
poetry. The man who has heard it
never forgets that wilderness music
to his dying day.
As for small birds, such as the
woodsman's friend, the chickadee, or
that wine-red winter visitor whisper.
Ing ite clear song, the pine grosbeak
from the North, or the horned lark
that brings the earliest music of spring
to frozen February fields—they are far
too numerous even to be mentioped
here,
Self-Made Men
No man Is wholly “self-made.” What.
ever he may have achieved there have
been many who have helped hiw lo the
302020202000 4
ARIAAH AH K TARAANANRE
STAR
DUST
Movie « Radio
M2022
story, “The Outcasts of Poker
less popular with the passing of
the years, Now It's to be turned into
the lead,
right along at RKO, and first thing he
knows he's likely to be a very popular
leading man,
mf
Incidentally, they've
ished a picture at RKO studio tha!
has everyone who has
seen it raving about it
It Is “The Ex-Mrs
Bradford,” with Wil
lam Powell, and Jean
Arthur, one of our
most talented blonds,
It's sald to be as good
as “The Thin Man,”
which is tops in the
way of praise. Powell
is a consistent per
former, year in and
Year out, He has won
new laurels for his
portrayal of Flo Ziegfeld in "The
Great Ziegfeld.”
mfr
All of Bill Hart's friends are cheer.
ing because he won that case of his
against United Artists, He asked for
$500,000, claiming that they didn't do
right by his last picture, “Tumble.
weeds,” on which he had spent $300,
000, all of his savings. That was way
back in 1925. The court gave him the
verdict, but cut the amount to $85,000,
—lfos
Jack Benny didn't mind writing his
own script for one brodeast, when the
chap who had doing It fell fli,
but he drew the line at writing it every
week—for writing a script and then
broadcasting a program as well takes
practically ail your ns Fred
Allen will tell you. So Goodman Ace,
one of radio's best writers, is helping
out; Benny has wanted him for a long
time, so now he's happy.
wee ff nnn
“Show Boat” is finished at fast,
with Helen Morgan and Paul Robeson
doing some marvelous singing in It;
in fact, you ought to see the picture If
only to heas him sing “Old Man
River.” it will probably be one of the
year's best pictures, certainly the best
of the musicals; even if you saw the
silent version made years ago, and the
play as well, you must see this one,
alone
Carl Laemmle startled everybody at
that final dinner give; for him before
his retirement, when he announced
that, a few years ago, he needed money
badly and didn't know where to turn.
His company, Universal could have
been sold for something like $80.000.
000 a few years before that, but he
didn't want to give up picture making.
He borrowed the money from Irving
Thalberg, who was his secretary be
fore he became the boy wonder of the
movie world and moved to Metro. And
Wm. Powell
been
time,
for less money than he once refused
for it, and Junior Laemmle may work
for Thalberg.
—
Sally Eilers had fun when she first
reached New York for a vacation, with
her husband, Marry Joe Brown, in tow.
She was born in New York but left for
California when she was six. So she
spent her first Sunday seeing sights;
riding on Fifth avenue busses, seeing
the Empire State building, Radio City,
and the Aquarium,
ll
Percy Westmore, one of Hollywood's
make-up experts, Is going on a lecture
tour that certainly ought to appeal to
women, He'll take along life masks
of 25 stars, and use them as illustra-
tions of the proper way to arrange
fa
Louise Fazenda is loud In her pralse
on Kay Francis’ new-
est picture, “The White
Angel” which is
on the life of
Says
first, how they could
out of it. They did;
they got a good one,
too. But It does seem
an awful waste to
£
£
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PATTERN NO, 1875-8
enjoyment
really there's no excuse for not be-
ing equipped for any
so easy and Inexpensive to make,
The divided skirt
golf, tennis, bieyceling, riding and hik
Uncle Phil ©
Says: ) A
That's Advancement
As men in a crowd instinctively
make room for one who would force
his way through it, so mankind
makes way
ward an object beyond them,
how {reely you spend.
waste money.
*honest opinion™ of a man
“doesn't know."
Beware of Idleness
Many of the wrong things men do
are done in
they can’t think of anything else to
do.
A man’s wife 1s his best “gulde.
book on etiquette.”
No man csn resist telling
and again how he felt when
stared him in the face”
A word out of the dictionary
makes a lowhrow suspicious; but he
idle moments
again
“death
going.
Early Habits Tell
they were twenty. If they “Jes set”
that's what they'll do when they're
old.
If diamonds could be found by the
bushel, they would stil] be as beau.
tiful as when they cost £5,000 apiece.
How the flagging conversation
blazes up just as everyone rises to
leave,
Ing. It assures plenty of room and
comfort, buttons on the side and sup-
ports the most youthful blouse, Note
the sports pocket, Peter Pan collar,
raglan sleeve and dainty feminine
bow,
Instead of the divided skirt, you
may have shorts If you prefer, for
the pattern is perforated at just the
proper length, Notice the small
sketch,
Barbara Bell Pattern No. 1875-B is
avallable In sizes 12, 14, 16, 18 and
20, Corresponding bust measurements
30, 82,.34, 86 and 38. Biz 18 (34)
requires 43% yards of 385 inch fabric,
For shorts only, 8% yards is required,
Send 15 cents for the pattern,
Bend your order to The Sewing
Circle Pattern Dept, 247 W. Forty-
third St. New York, N. Y.
© Bell Byndicate,— WNU Bervice,
Holland Tunnel Engineers
Didn’t Consider Esmeralda
Perhaps it was due to an over.
sight by the engineers who designed
tunnel, under the Hud-
any rate Esmeralda, a circus giraffe,
couldn't be squeezed through
Esmeralda was on a truck
driver realized the grave
and the
Someone
meralda
suggested slipping Es
in sideways, but the truck
large to hold her
The problem was heatedly
debated for some time. Finally the
George Washington bridge was sug-
enough
hey regulate
Purpose of Freckles
Freckles keep a boy from getting
J
QUICKLY SAFELY 0
To instantly relieve pain, stop nag-
ging shoe pressure and quickly,
safely loosen and remove corns or
callouses — use New De Luxe Dr.
Scholl's Zino-pads. These soothing,
Jing. cushioning pads prevent sore toes
and blisters, Fein color; waterproof.
At all drug, shoe and department stores.
Real Perspective
You may laugh at trouble, but not
until some time afterward.
5 Eo) : =
FE FAS] Sprinkle Peterman’s Am
Food along window sills, doors, any place where
ants, black ants, others. Quick. Safe. Guaranteed
35¢ and 60c at your nearest druggist’s,
PETERMAN'S
ANT FOOD
AILING ALL THE TIME
Mrs J. M Waldron of
B Street, Route 23,
Parkersburg, W. Va,
said: “Any litle effort
completely tired me out.
I hardly slept a wink
at night bad splittin
headaches and 1 wy
> become excited easily, 1
. was so thin and pale 1
didn’t Jock lke myself at all After using
Dr. Pierce's Favorite P i a few
weeks 1 gradually gained weight and strength
and 1 knew my food was doing me more
od” Buy now of your druggist
many Men
I had no serious
wom me down.
3034:
SKIN