BRISBANE
THIS WEEK
Mussolini Goes Through |
Practical Selassie
. Snake Killed One A
Which End of the Gun?
Mussolini's men entered Addis Ababa, |
driving out the Ethioplan looters, bring-
ing safety to vari-
ous foreigners, in- |
cluding our own
minister.
Rome went wild
with joy; and no
wonder.
In seven months
Mussolini has con-
quered Ethiopia's
millions, killing and
wounding 250,000 of
them, marching
steadily ahead
through dangerous
valleys and high
mountains, driving
Arthur Brisbane ,;: the Ethiopian
armies, that were directed by skilled
soldiers from Turkey, Scandinavia and
elsewhere,
Those impressed by the high quall-
tiles of Ethiopia's Arab slave-trading
ruler will note that in the great erisis
his presence of mind remained. The
Associated Press says he took with
him on the British boat “the Imperial
family jewels, many cases of gold bul-
lion and gold coins.” On his way
from Addis Ababa to the British ship
he stopped to take all the cash from
the treasury and customs house at
Diredawa,
In Florida, a well-meaning preacher,
who thought it his duty to let rattle
snakes bite him to show the power of
God, actually did let the snakes bite
him without first removing their fangs.
He is dead, the jury sald, “by the bite
of a rattlesnake through his own care-
lessness.”
The poor fanatic succeeded only In
proving the power of rattlesnake pol-
son. The laws of the universe could
hardly be suspended to justify the
whim of one well-meaning fanatie.
to the
he-tak-
It makes a difference,
No. 1 Public Er
en-alive™ bandit,
pointed. Mr, Karpis
alive, with no struggle, beyond holding
a straw hat over his face to baffle
tographers.
even
rewards;
a re
red-haired
Much efficiency in cash
Dillinger defiled all the “G-men™;
ward was offered, and a
lady delivered him to the “G-men”™ bul-
lets, and got £35,000.
Whether the $7,000 reward
for Karpis
that courageous one remains
seen,
offered
tempted some friend of
to be
The criminal is in business for mon-
ey, and when he can sell a friend for
$5,000, that seems preferable te risk.
ing his own life. The reward system
should be extended; £5000 reward for
evidence resulting in arrest and con-
victon of any murderer,
The Carnegle Institute announces a
“new law of matter” having to do with
the “cohesion of infinitesimal particles
of matter within the atom.”
If it were not for that law, accord-
ing to scientists, “the universe would
consist of nothing but light hydrogen
gas.” That should interest politi-
clans, who, after the big conventions,
will live, until November, in a universe
consisting of something lighter than
“light hydrogen gas.”
England's new king, Edward the
Eighth, is sald to be engaged to marry
the Princess Alexandrine Louise of
Denmark, twenty-one years old, the
English king's third cousin,
The uncle of the young lady says he
and her father know nothing of it.
Nevertheless, it Is difficult to believe
that King Edward wlll remain a bache-
lor, whether he marries this charming
young princess or some other, possi-
bly a good healthy young Scotch girl,
if one available could be found,
Dr. Walter Emerson Priggs, who
teaches dentistry in Tufts college, says
“women can take any kind of pain
without a whimper.”
Women endure palin more courage-
ously than men. Childbirth has taught
them to suffer and endure in isolation.
Man shows his heroism preferably in
crowds, In squadroms, platoons: often
he would not do that If it did not
take more courage to stay behind alone
than to go ahead with the others,
Women's Is the courageous sex, man
is the other kind and might as well
admit it, :
The only certain immortality is rep-
resented by our children left behind to
work on this earth. It must be of |
great interest to provide a child to fill
a throne and rule the world's greatest
empire—whether or not it lasts,
Two misguided Mexicans decided to
ring bells of the ancient mission church
at Juarez, Mexico, to celebrate the
nomination of a National Revolutionary
candidate for governor of Chihuahua,
The plous ladies of Juarez thought
those old bells should not be rung
for any revolutionary candidate, and it
became necessary for troops to rescue
the beliringers from the Infuriated
women, giving a good Imitation of
Euripides man-hunting Bacchae,
When women start they mean it
Features alos. ay
about:
Chronic Influenza,
ALM SPRINGS. CALIF.—
I came out here to get rid of
my influenza. But as I pen these
om. This is not the puny, trifling
influenza of the interior, but the
golden Californin—the one outstanding
product of this coast
which our tourist bu-
reaus do not advertise,
In the chronic form,
it's like visiting kin-
folks from back East,
arriving in the fall and
hanging on all winter.
The kind I have stays
long enough to make
you wish you were
48 4 dead and not quite
long enough to kill
Irvin 8. Cobb you.
After swallowing so many different
remedies I am, as you might say, full
of conflicting emulsions. When I sneeze
my watch stops. When I cough sea
lions get jealous and I seem to feel
a lot of things giving way inside of me.
When I open my mouth somebody
sticks In either a pill or a thermome-
ter and neither one helps.
* ® -
Testing Drunken Drivers.
FoR testing drunken drivers
Cleveland
police have a
named the opthalmie
stereoscope. But why not just ask the
suspect to pronounce it and abide by
the results?
Old times back home, we had our
own system. We didn't follow the
New York scheme of inviting the al-
leged inebriate to say “Sissie Fitzger-
ald," because he'd probably take refuge
in his constitutional rights as a south-
ern gentleman and refuse to bandy a
lady's name In any such place as the
calaboose,
the
device
televinocular
Under our plan, If a citizen was ly-
ing In the street and his fingers didn't
move, he was intoxicated,
finger moved, he merely was
But if even
ta Hen)
his little
resting,
ut we didn’t have aleohollie anto-
ies to pester us, The surplus pop
ulation was reduced with
cutlery, thus
chance,
firearins or
everybody a
giving
* * *
Mankind’s Real Humanity,
YY hat with this and that, just
when a fellow Is almost ready to
decide that the human race should he
charged off as practically a total
something happens.
This time it in a little
mine in Nova Scotia where the ealm
heroism of two men, penned with the
body of their dead comrade at the
bottom of a cavedin shaft, was
matched by the magnificent gallantry,
the incredible endurance of volunteer
rescuers, who, by day and night, un
ceasingly labored om Ip momentary
peril of death for themselves to save
the lives of that trapped palr—and
did save them.
And a week or so before that it
happened when a young girl dragged
the only other survivors of an airplane
crash out of the flaming wreckage and
ministered to them and forgot her own
hurts while she waded long miles down
a snow-drifted mountain to give the
alarm, and, having given It, stageered
back again to do what else she might.
» * ».
loss,
happened
Bankers Versus Politics.
poLrics certainly makes estranged
bedfellows.
But a Presidential eampaign or two
behind us and across the scene with
thunderous tread stalked the sacred
white cows of big money, their pdders
dripping wisdom, their gentlest bellow
harkened to with eager ears by candl-
dates and delegates alike. Statecraft
mingled with high finance was what
they offered in a rich and creamy
measure to one and all—the pontifical
Mitchell, the omnipotent Dawes, the in-
fallible Insull, the wondrous Wiggin
(subsequently known as the uncovered
Wiggin). And lo, the voice of Owen
D. Young was heard In the land.
of yesteryear?
tinguished or, as the case may be, ex.
tinguished International banker tries to
get into either national convention
they'll charge him admission.
* . *
Meandering Horsemen.
DARING soul, residing In a back
horseback to New York. After jogging
scribed as a series of general direc
miles out of his way.
Why, he even outwandered Senator
Black of ¢'sbama, and up until the
other day, when the administration
threw a net over him, the senator held
the world’s championship for loose
wandering.
It's startling, isn’t it, how suddenly
the great silence descends upon a
statesman who gets out of line with
the top bosses?
Copyright.«W NU Service,
Calcium Excess Causes Goiter
Goiter has been produced in white
mice by feeding them a diet contaln
ing an excess of calcium,
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AMES MELTON, one of ra-
dio’s sweetest singers, has fin-
in “Cain and Mabel.” Before |
quiries as to his own importance
in the picture—wanted to know what
ete,
He knew that Marion Davies, being
the star, would come first In the hearts
of the publicity men for the company.
A casual Inquiry revealed the fact that
he'd come second, which was all right
with him. But for the moment neither |
he nor his Informant recalled that |
Mary Boland was also cast for that |
picture—and Miss Boland is pretty {m- |
portant, being an excellent actress and
a favorite of movie fans as well.
Also—Mr, Melton is, first of all, a
singer. The script calls for a prize
fighter as a hero. The question at the
moment is—Iif yon take his singing
away from Mr. Melton, will you have
a prize-fighter?
fe
Now It's Harold Lloyd who wants
to make pictures In eolor. He has been
making experiments on
his own hook for the
Inet
Inst
not yet
whether or not
two years, but is
quite sure
wanid add to the type
of comedies
makes,
F :
thro
Just ictur
from now
ake two a year,
year: on
Harold Lloyd
And wit}
Way," as
der the he:
Those radio programs of Bing Cros.
by's are rapidly becoming one of the
best of the broadcasts; he is getting
really big names, (or rather, his spon.
sor is getting them for him), and he
makes a delightful master of ceremo.
nies. Better add this program to the
list of those you tune in on Thursday
evenings,
&* -
“The
of course you'll
When you see *
{and 11 you'll
hear “A Pretty Girl Is Like a Melody”
beautifully sung. Allan Jones sang it,
while Stanley Morner was
graphed as If he were singing it. Jones
did not get screen credit, and Morner,
who has a good singing voice, got cred.
it but didn't sing.
- Ho
The youngsters in Hal Roach's “Our
Gang” started on a personal appear.
ance tour a while ago, which has
proved so successful that they will go
on and on right through the summer,
Not only children, but grown people
as well, arrive for the first show and
then right on till closing time.
es lf
As if there hadn't been enough trou.
ble over Mae West's latest “Klondike
Annie,” the Chinese government is ob
Great Ziegfeld™
gee It) i
photo.
welcome visitor In the Orient,
ssl sao
Another picture that you'll want to
see is “I Married a Doctor”—which
you'll recognize as Sin. |
clair Lewis’ great
book, “Main Street”
Josephine Hutchinson
and Pat O'Brien have
the leads, and do ex.
ceedingly well by them,
However, here's a
word of warning to
tors; don't take the
girl you hope to mar.
ry to see this one, for
it may make them feel
that doctors don't
make very good husbands,
wf !
Staging a come-back In plctures was
rather a hard thing for Dolores Cos
tello Barrymore to do: she was a vie
tim of the early days of talkies, when i
she was given such Insane speeches |
that audiences laughed at her, which |
cost her an opportunity she really de- |
served, i
But she took volce lessons, and die |
tion lessons, and did so well ln “Little |
Lord Fauntleroy” that Paramount has |
signed her up. Now It looks as if a |
real career 18 opening for her. i
I.
ODDS AND ENDS . . . When people
Pat O'Brien
was going to fly back to Hollywood she
said, "No; I'm a sissy, I'll take the train”
« « + Al Jolson and Ruby Keeler did the
same . . . But a few accidents
frightened the general public;
ervations still have to be
ahead . . . Eddie Robinsan
All Around
Zoe House
Soot on wall paper may be re
moved with corn meal. Brush off as
much of the soot as possible, then
rub on corn meal untill it becomes
solled, and brush off.
To determine whether or not the
soll In your garden is acid, buy 10
cents’ worth of litmus paper at the
drug store. Put litmus in a ball of
moistened earth taken from your
garden, If the slip turns pink, soll
Is acid
. » »
When making iced tea double the
amount of tea leaves used. When ice
melts it weakens tea,
+ " -
Dilute canned soup with water In
which vegetables have been bolled
instead of with pure water, The
flavor is much better,
® * ®
If water seeps through the wells
of your garden pool, paint with wa-
terproof paint,
© Bell Syndicate. —~WNU Service.
Baseball’s 100th Birthday
to Be Observed This Year
The birth of basebal] at Coopers-
town, N, Y., will be celebrated there
this summer on its 100th anniver-
sary. The Albany legislature Is being
asked to vote $5,000 toward study-
ing the development of the game
from the beginning and to advertise
the celebration. The field on which
the first game was played Is called
Doubleday fleld after the inventor of
the game. The baseball museum of
records of the sport and its greatest
players also Is located at Coopers-
town,
mana —
Hy
GT
DELICIOUS §
bli ea Op [P
SOmounsi? {
3
i
SOUPS
Ad
STEERS ARE
THE BEST IN
THE COUNTY!
PLEASE LET
DOCTOR TOLD
YOU THAT You
WOULDN'T FEEL
ANY BETTER
UNTIL You QUIT
COFFEE AND
SWITCHED TO
BILL, WHY
iho
at E1 STEERS!
Ls
9] HE DOESN'T WORK
HALF AS HARD AS
R HEAD DOESN'T ACHE
ALL THE TIME, pm
EITHER ! pe
NOBODY
CARES HOW
You FEEL -BUT
JUST LET ONE
a. OF THOSE STEERS
B- GET A HEADACHE /
BUT WHY
STUBBORN
ABOUT IT ?
ALL RIGHT ~
ALL RIGHT /
TIWTRY IT
WOMAN HAS §
RUNED ME/ f
18-38
Name,
Street.
i
State.
»
expires