ER
WOMEN!
Each package of “Diamond Dyes’
contains directions so simple that any
wool, silk, linen, cotton or mixed
Buy “Diamond Dyes"—no other
nd—then perfect results are guaran-
ments, whether
M————
draperies, coverings.
Depends on How You Look at It
Weary Willlam-—-Gee whiz!
woild must be going crazy. Dere's an
fore Dirngeist hag eolor eard,
Success.
Banks—How did he
Mrs. ever be
traveled 4,000 miles to take baths.
That Depends.
“How 1 would like to taste
cherry lips!” “Why, do you fancy the
lipstick flavor?
Mrs. De Boggs—He used to pass op
Endearing Occupation.
“James is a dear, but he is certain.
"”
“I see: n regular honeybhug.”
as those from growin
grain farms at proportionately low
every rural convenience; good schoo!
scale than is possible under
gate what
eaibws / rates, location of land, ete, sppiy to
tivo, Geawn, Canada, or
HIRAM EVIDENTLY A SNORER
Faithful Wife Thought She Recog-
nized Porcine Lamentations as
Made by Her Lord and Master,
sleeping car just before the train
pulled out of the Pennsylvania station
in New York, and
woman taking the lower berth
mun the upper of a
soon retired, the
and the
ter and a
gers man
his lofty couch, but it
piished and the car presently becaune
quiet,
Some
couple of friendly
passen-
to enable the to attain to
Was aceon
time during the night the
train was held up on a siding,
it happened, the
stopped right alongside a car
with uncomfortable and loudly
ing hogs
tions ascended to the stars,
“Oh. Lord
er berth
listen to that! Hiram has st
snorin’ and 1 can’t get up
make him turn over!”
and, as
gleeping car was
loaded
protest-
the noise of whose lamenta
the occupant of the
was heurd to moan.
Taking Joy Out of Life.
“The meanest man 1 know Is a
young fellow who boards with us.”
“What is the matter with him?”
“He is trying out an invention to
keep subscribers from listening
& party
when
line is being used.”
Some women are as set in thei
wuys as an old hen,
If vou must look at people's faults
shut your eyes,
Edrg
a Ta i
HIS CHANCE TO GET EVEM
Ex-Buck's Opportunity for Revenge or
Former Top Sergeant Too
Good to Miss.
The ex-buck was hack at his old pre
which the tools consisted
black silk
darkened
ar trade, In
¢
and
the
flashlight
Inside
silent,
heavy hreathing of the man
bed.
burglar gathered up his spoils
and a few odds and
of a pocket
handkerchief,
house all was
who lay
asleep on the
The
wa. ch, money
to nmke Then,
turned the light on
and let it creep up
his departure, obey
ing an hnpulse, he
an in the bed
it reached the
“My God!
face.
he gasped,
Then,
resolution, hé tip
1 moment he hesitated,
t and"
f : . m.~—Home
mreau
Tree Surgery.
Another new and growing work akin
This was
man, who now
maintains » school to train his work
to forestry, is tree surgery.
the company at the satisfactory com
pletion of the
scientific,
course,
interesting, well and
paid
gives a boy a
Life.
life. Joys’
Good Reason,
“Nid Billy eall up his girl on the
long distance phone.”
“No: he was too short”
coffee.
TOOK AN EXCEPTION.
argumentative
wus
He was an local
and
Smith,
of one and half a dozen
other, jut 1 say. "No''—
“No: it 1s not!
of the sort, It is exa@lly the cu
trary."—London Tit-Bits,
that
of the
Sensing the Film Fans' Tastes.
Enger Anuthor-—<1I've got a grest
here, Deep sen play, with
starfish, and other deni-
zens of the deep as our animal actors,
-Nope, wouldn't do;
Most of the au-
made up of hard
shrimps, crabs an’
clams—an’ they'd be bored to death.—
Film Fun,
octopussics
Neenario Editor
not enough novelty.
dience are shells,
suckers, lobsters,
The Extremist.
“Your friend, Miss Blank,
atrict said a
menting on a girl who had refused ic
eat brandy sauce with plum pudding
“Strict doesn't
the girl's
particular she won't
aver a spirit
Tit-Bits,
A Puzzler.
when ans
is a vers
teetotaler.” man com
CXPress iH replied
“Why.
heat her curling
lamp I" London
friend, she's tha
tones
“Ma.
from you
one steals anything
mustn't vou forgive him un-
took 7
“yf course not. my child”
“Then I'l tell Dick
tit he gives back what he
when he comes
strajght back the kiss he stole fro
me vesterday.”
“You and Grunp seem to get alon
preity well”
“Yes, you see he
anything but trouble, and ths
only thing I ever have 1
A Contingency.
The early bird will get the worm,
Of that there iz no question
But if, alas, the worm should turn
He'd get the indigestion
The Reason.
“They say more fish is eaten In Ja-
pen than in any other country.”
“1 suppose that is because they ean
manage the bones there with Japan
ese.”
Sure Ways.
“What is the quickest way to ges
world?”
“Either get a Job with an
or pat a mule on the off hind leg
Pleasant Change.
“You are working too har"
“1 must finish this novel.”
“Sometimes 1 wish I had trained
you to wipe dishes” declared his
“Why, my dear?
“Then you could get away from your
it's a Great Life!
Harry—Old Miserly worked hard
and long, but he finally succeeded in
Hugh—Yes; he now has enough
mainder of his life
Contrary Success.
“Bings has been remarkably success.
ful. It certainly requires headwork in
his business.”
he landed with both feet”
Well Drilled.
diers than single ones?”
“Of course. They're more nccus-
tomed to discipline.”
Dad's Dictum,
“I love your daughter, but fear I
am no match for her”
“You sure ain't. But why should
that keep you from getting her? No
married man Is a mateh for his wife.”
~Loulsville Courier-Journal,
Their Nature. ;
“Oculists’ bills are particularly frei.
tating.” yb
“Why so?”
“Becnuse In their very nature they
are calculated to develop eye-rate pos.
sibilities”
ment, special remedies.
Children.
ALGOHOL-3 PER Go
AVegetable Preparation iras
similating the Food by Bagel
ting the Stomacks and Bowels ©
| Thereby Promoting Digest
Cheerfulness and Rest Gontams
neither Opium, M ad
{oT NARCOTIC
SANUELATCER
em
A helpful Remedy for
and Feverishness i
Loss oF SLEEP
resulting therefrom in Y |
Pac Simile signature of
Gar A
si
dara.
Tore Grav GOAT:
TTL IT
10
Exact Copy of Wrapper.
A Sermon to the Mule,
He was skinned driver of
1 team of fretful mules,
an ebony
hitched to a
tarbage wagon. He depended on his
somsand of “whon, haw
mules go where he
or gee” to
nake the willed,
wr to stop directly by the garbage to
up. One day, in
demands of them to “whoa”
be picked spite of
tix loud
they proceeded to wend their uneven
beyond the
front of
muie
way for quite a distance
ontalper. Going around in
the team, he Jooked the lead
squarely in the and =aid,
cuftediy : “Now, mule, I wants to know
shy you can't listen.”
eyes
A Neediess Remark.
“Has your wife a volce?
“She never gave me the
the contrary.”
reason to believe
RONEN NR
Children
’
Pa hy
.
CR o Ron a
ER
The False
7
oe
Cry For
. Sa ye oN
a) ote Mt hl
’
Re a J A,
A
that beat the hare.
smiles to their little-one.
copied has no value.
#
Reasoning.
“Yes, doctor, 1 know the fish wasn't
fresh, but it would have been entirely
spoiled by the next day 0 1 hadn't
eaten |
“Soouldn’t it have been better
the fish spoil than to
stomach?
“Well, no. You can give me
thing to fix my stomach all right,
I''m blessed if there
can do for a really
to let
upset your
ROMS
but
is anything you
fish.”
spoiled
During the honeymoon a man
wife confesses
him to reform
miles
that
married him,
Hope spring® eternal, Every
ried man hopes to be able to do just
ag he pleases some day.
.
Utter
“1%» sounds of
Eilence.
hattie have been
declaimed
“No longer do the shells
bullets whistle, the ma-
their rat-tat-tst
etiile’ these many months.™
the orator
shriek, the
chine guns spit out
‘And you might nade
1.” interposed
peacetime
tly disturbed by
~Home Sector.
the ex-soidier, “that our
3
l
slumbers are not exa«
he popping of corks’
The Proper Place.
“Where in desk shall 1 put
these articles on the dove of pesce¥®
“Put them in some pigeon bole™
Giving Proof,
“I think Maude ix a woman of very
open disposition,” *I notice it is bard
your
REAKFAST is too
often eaten as a duty
rather than a joy. The suc-
cess of the day may depend
upon the spirit of break-
fast. The Royal Education-
al Department presents
some breakfast dishes that
will send the children to
school with a hip hip hur-
rah and his majesty man
to his daily duties with the
“yp and doing” feeling
which knows no discour-
agement,
Muffins
$ cups flour
3tenspogns Royal Baking
r
: tablespoon shortening
Sift together flour, bakin
powder, sugar and salt; ad
milk, well-beaten eggs and
melted shortening; mix well
Grease muffin tins and qut
two tablespoons of batter in-
to each, Bake in hot oven 20
to 25 minutes.
Eggless Muffing
Royal Baking
Tients,
siorten-
Mix and sift dry in
add milk and melt
BAKING
POWDER
Absolutely Pure
ing and beat until smooth.
Bake in greased muffin tins
in hot oven 20 tc 25 minutes.
Com Muffins
% cup corn meal
74 Sule Bo Sout Royal B
ns Ro: aking
Powder
4 teaspoon salt
tabl ns sugar
1 aBiirtons shortening
Sift together corg meal, flour,
baking powder, salt and su-
gar; add milk, melted short
ening and well-beaten egg;
mix well Grease muffin tins
and drop two tablespoons of
mixture into each. Bake about
35 minutes in hot oven.
Popovers
2
re
gen
2 cups milk
Sift together flour and salt
Make a well in flour, break
into well, add milk and
stir until smooth, Pour into
greased gem pans and
bake 25 to 35 minutes in a
very hot oven. If taken out
oo oven too soon they will