My Lost Self You wonder why my eyes are dim with tears, Then, shall I tell you? Long and long ago—- Bo loug ngo! years piled on weary yoars— Thove was alittle child 1 used to know. And every day and night aud every hour We took lite's gift together, sun and shale, And saw the rainbow shining through the shower, And heard the talk that butldiog robins made. We thought the world was ours to come and go About its Lighways, finding treasures are; Wa thought 211 heaven was ours, and fash- ioned so Grand castle after castle high in air! Ah! now I find the world a desert wild; No room in all the sky for tower of mine But most of all I miss my comrade child, Her brave, true courage and her faith divine, Dead? Clanged? only know That sometimes from the mirror's shin- ing space In my own featores, worn and faded so, 1 catch a ghimmer of the bright lost face. I know not, sweet, 1 MADE A PRISONER. “Welcome home, Alf, my dear boy!” My brother grasped my hand as he said these words, and did not release it un- til he had led me up the tune-honored steps of our ancestral home, and begun to assist me to unfasten my great-coat. “+ And how are you, my lad?” he con- | tinued, without giving me time to reply | to his hearty reception. **Why, you | look as brown as a berry, and certainly none the worse for your fifteen years’ nabobism.”’ I bad just returned to England after having endured the trying cliinate of | India for fifteen years, and had hasten- | ed at once to the old mansion where I | had been born, and which was, at the i time of my story, in possession of my | eldest brother, Stephen. Our family | bears the hovored name of Stanley, and | are a younger branch of the noble house | of that name. They had been settled | for many centuries in a wild part of | the Northwest Riding of Yorkshire, | upon an estate that was very beautiful | from an artistic point of view, but very | poor from a pecuniary aspect; and con- sequently many generations of younger | sons had been forced to push their way | in the world, as I had. My half-brother Stephen was twelve | vears older than I was, and had always i regarded me with an affection more | fuiheriy than brotherly, delighting in giving we pet names; and even when | years of foreign travel had tanned my | originally fair complexion and silvered | my hair, I was amused by the way In which, upon this our first meeting after many years. he ignored the present, and | kept up the old manners and sayings which had characterized him when I was a boy at Stauley House, i A substantial repast was provided for | me in the old dining-room, and after I | had done justice to it, and the gray- headed butler {who had ofliciated in my father’s time) had brought in the wine, Stephen and I were soon in deep con- | versation on topics peculiarly interest | ing to me, **So you think the old place is chang- ed, do you?” he said, musingly, in re- | ply to a remark of mine, *‘1’'ve not | noticed it; but it may be, it may be.” “Indeed it is, Stephen,” I said. *'I | hink you are allowing the best part of | the house to fall into decay. Now in | my fathers's day the west wing—’ “Hush!” he cried, interrupting me | with a startled look in his eyes, “Don't mention that, for Heaven's | sake! She loved those rooms.” : In a moment I liad grasped his hand, | “Forgive me, Stephen!’ I exclaimed, | as the terrible pas’ flashed across my | mind, and I saw 1 had Opened an old wound. § “There is nothing to forgive, Alf, | my bovy’’ be said, looking nto the! bright fire with an anxious, troubled face. “You could not know of all the | norror of that terrible time.’ Indeed i could not, for I was but a | boy when | went to India. Neverthe- less, I had heard sufficient while there | of wy brother's unfortunate marriage to convince me of the pain which any allusion to it would give him. 1 haa heard how he had married a beautiful girl, and how fondly he had loved her, and bow, after three months of married life, she had deserted him, With whom or whither she had gone no one knew; and Lier name had become almost a for- gotten sound at Stanley House, I changed the subject of the conver gation, and tried to make him forget the unpleasant recollections which my words had raised, by relating some of the most amusing adventures that had befallen me whilst abroad; but, though he listened with interest, and seemed to try to shaky» off the gloom that had set. tied upon Lis wind, he never quite re- gained his wonted cheertulness during the remainder of the evening, and re- tired carly to rest, excusing himself by saying it was his custom. Among the evils of civilization which my somewhat stormy passage through Jite had taught me, that of late hours was Ly no meaus the smallest, and knowing that it would be useless for me to turn into bed before midnight, 1 put on my hat lit a cigar, and strolled into the grounds to get a breath of fresh air. It was a fine summer night, The moon was shining brightly from a clear, starlit ky. I knew every foot of the ground, and visited many of my favor- ite haunts, and it must have been after Seven o'clock before 1 to think returning. cigar gone out when I Dg od the bottom of the long avenue of tall and beginning to feel chilly I somewhat quickly towards the house, crunching the gravel beneath my feet as I went. As I drew near the front door, my attention was attracted by the sudden ubiafie of a man bear a lantere, bad evi- ed to speak to lnm, when, to my great astonishment, after glancing at me eagerly, he turned away without any sign of recognition, and hurried rapldly in the direction of the deserted west wing. My first intention was to call out after him, but upon second thought I “decided not to do so, for I wus per- suaded that he had seen and recogniz- ed me, and that perhaps my company might not be desired, so 1 entered the house, and was soon in bed and asleep, The next morning when I came down stalrs, I found Stephen already in the breakfast-room awaiting me. He was standing with his back to the fire. “Good-morning, Alf,’? he said, smil- ing in his cheerful manner. *‘You are an exception to most lovers of late hours, I see.” “Yes,” I replied, ‘I sleep soundly, and therefore rise early.” “You'll find the nights long and dull here, I'm afraid, after the excitement to which you've been accustomed,” “Oh, no, not at all,” Isaid, “There are 80 many old associations about Stanley House that 1 think I shall never be dull here, Now, last night 1 stroll- ed through the grounds, and did not re- turn until close upon midnight,” “These late hours seem to me tobe a very stupid custom, and one which I could never cultivate. 1 think, my boy, that you would have been much wiser if you bad turned in when I did and slept until morning.’ “Why, I dare say 1 was in bed be- fore you,” Yn “In bed betore me? he repeated s seem to see not, Give me ons word, that I may hefir you as the satne Ste- phen that you were before this fearful malady overtook you, Let me again sed the light of heaven and the faces of my friends!’ I crept softly nearer the door, and got into a position from which I could partly distinguish the occupants of the room and their surroundings. It was a handsomely furnished apart- ment, half boudoir, half drawing-room, Every luxury which the heart or brain could desire was scattered about in end- less variety. In the centre of the floor stood my brother, but with such a strange, wicked, frenzied expression on his face, that, had I not known his teatures well, 1 should have thought that it could not be he. Before him knelt a woman whose face was buried in her hands. **You shall not leave me thus!” she cried, as he turned to go, **I must, I will have my liberty, 1 tell you!” She had started to her feet and ran to the door. But Stephen, still without any chapge in his fixed countenance, seized her roughly by the arm, and pushed her from him and walked quick- ly toward the door. I hardly had time to draw back into the shadow of a curtain when he enter- ed the room where I was and walked quickly across to the landing, closing this last door after him and locking it. Thus I found myself also a prisoner, 1 beard his footsteps descend the stalrs; and then the sound died slowly away. For a few moments 1 stood puzzled with a puzzled look, **What do you mean?’ less you finish your rest and rise before twelve I, M." **You must be joking, AIL,’ he said, incredulously. “I was in bed by nine o'clock, and was up this morning at six.” “Surely you must be mistaken, Stephen, for I met you or your double at the top of the avenue last night as I was returning to the house,” ‘Impossible!’ “Indeed, I did. I would have spok- en to you, but you hurried away, and | I thought you had seen me and wished to be alone.” “It could not have never out of the o'clock.” I was | seven | been house me, alter All that day I was haunted by the recollection of what I had seen ou the | previous night, and of my brother's | denial, I had heard singuiar stories of had left England, and could not help | 3 i wondering if Le was still addicted to | seen him walk in bis sleep, andas 1 had | only half believed the tales I had been | told, I was not inclined to accept this i lem. However, I was determined to solve the mystery. As soon as all were in bed, therefore, on the night following that on which I | had arrived at Stanley Ilfouse, I again | went out into the grounds, determined, if 1 met the mysterious person whom I bad seen on the previous night, to fol- | low him and see who he was, The moon was shining fitfully from behind the stormy clouds that now and then stirred and whistled in the branches of | the trees, I paced. upon: the grass be- peath the tall elms that pointed their foliaged branches to the frowning sky. bouse, which bad been so long shut up | and left to fall into decay. So great, | indeed, had been my brother's horror | lest any portion of it should be touched | by human foot, that not only had he | boarded up every window and door that | communicated without, but he | had also caused to be bunit up every door that had given access from it to | the main body of the building. My head was full of thoughts of my boyhood as 1 walked to and fro. I re- membered many happy days spent in those rooms, for they had been my father’s favorites; and it was not with- I looked at them, deserted and ruinous, simply be- | caus, a false woman had also loved them. I had waited until past midnight, | up my quest as hopeless, and was about to relurn to | the damp gravel walk approaching, 11 drew back into the thadow of the trees, and peered forth into the darkness, for at that moment a thick cloud shut out the light of the moon. Nearer and nearer the footsteps came, and at length the glimmering of a lantern shone out on the darkness, The man bearing the light went up to the princi- pal enirance of the west wing, where he paused, and a moment later 1 heard a key shoot back the heavy lock; the next instant the light and the man disappered as the door closed behind thew. > Animated and excited, I stepped quickly but softly across the gravel walk to the door, where for a moment I paused and listened. A footstep was ascending the creaking staircase, I waited until I heard it on the second flight before I tried the door. I found it open, and entered softly, closing the door behind me, Before proceeding further, I cautiously took off my boots, and then I asce the cold clammy stairs that smelled of the tomb, From the second landing there open- ed a suite of apartments, which 1 re- membered had been called the strong rooms, because they were in the very heart of the building, had few win dows, and only the door for ingress or egress, The heavy oak door that opened into these rooms I found was ajar, and a bright light streamed out lLetween the opening. To my great eo A rg Bed a Wr voices in y! t first 1 was so amazed that I could not distinguish a single spoken; but as 1 became calm, and, after dea close to the door of the room from which the sound ' I distinctly a woman's voice in tearful accents saying: “Oh, if ge love me, deliver me from this Ya have I dots that I not loved with » true as to what course 1 sliould pursue, I force the massive lock, or when morn- ing came to attract the outer world; for, as 1 have said, the rooms were heart of the west wing, and the few windows which had of yore let in the light of heaven to them had been filled up with strong masonry. I was aroused from my thoughts by chamber. Stephen had closed alter him, ed and then entered. My tap had the graceful form seated in a char, in an attitude which betokened despair, and her beautiful heveled hatr falling in waving about her, “Madam!"” my hand upon her shoulder, pale, tearful, horror-stricken face, that shrunk away in fear. “Who are you? Pray do not hurt me, 1 kosow 1 am helpless, ’' It was some time before I could con- vince ber that 1 wus really a friend; tion blunted, Dy degrees, however, I made ber understand who 1 how I had come there; and then, in an- swer to my questions, I gleaned history of her captivity. When my brother married her was & handsome girl of eighteen, and be was verging ov middle age. For she and attentive. Just al the end of that time, however, he dis covered, accidently, several for some days afterward hie was moody, jealous and strange in his One night he entered her room with that fixed, frenzied, wicked look on his face which she had never seen there be- fore, but which had marred his feat. ures, in all her interviews since, and directed her by sigus to lol- low Lim, a mandate which in ber terror she readily obeyed. He conducted her oil lamp, aud then left her, locking the door behind him, At intervals, for bringing food and clothing with him; bearing himself in manner. Al length he led her back cation with the outer world, had visited her almost every ing as hie caine, “I think shose foolish husband, have turned his brain. 1 was warned before I married him that he was affected by the peculiar malady of sleep walking, and that when under its influence he not only lost complete con- trol of his reason, but also seemed tw live a double hfe, When awake he was generous, frank and good; but when in a sompabulent state, | was told he was morose, jealous, wicked in one word, insane; and that in his waking hours be had no recollection of what took place or what he did in this latter state,” Fortunately I found 1 had my pow. der flask In my pocket, and thus was able to set myself and my unfortunate brother’s wife at liberty by exploding the locks. I took my protege to the rectory, where the rector, who was an old col- lege friend of mine, wus not a little surprised to receive such visitors at so eatly an hour, ore returning to Stanley House I rode on the rector’s cob to wy brother's doctor, who lived two miles away. and consulted him upon Stephen's sad cons dition, He told me he was quite aware of the facts of the case, but that he had not for a moment thought the malady Bad buen capable of doing so much mis. jac or cure him, At the doctor's request, I lock i, ovr my hi 0’ : . in 1 v to me, Do not Jook at me with eves so glassy that they we and two hours afterwards I went out to meet the doctor, When I met him we proceeded to the west wing together, but as soon as I reached the door | saw it wus ajar—Stephen had been there be- fore us! I hurried into the house, and was about to run up stairs, when I stumbled over some article at the bot. tom, The doctor, who was following, carried a lantern, and its light soon re- vealed the bleeding form of my brother, “He is dead,” sald the doctor, after making a hasty examination of the body, *In his frenzy he must have dashed himself down the stairs. Poor fellow! we have been too late to save him!" Five years have fled since that time, Stanley House has been renovated, and again holds a happy bride and vbride- groom. A fair face looks over my shoulder as I write, and drops a tear upon the page, forgetting the darkness of the past in the brightness of the future, IN ont Old and New Fashioned Winters. Old men’s memories of the weather, which are full of the “hard winters” of their youth or early manhood--win- ters which far exceeded in severity these later ones with which the present generation are familiar—are not sup- ported by a table which has been re- cently published giving the dates of the closing of the navigation of the Hudson river since 1816, In 1845 it was closed by the ice on the 4th of De- cember and so remained until February 24th, 1846, But in 1876 it was closed on December 21 and remained shut up till March 26 th, In 1817 it was closed on December Tih, bat in 1823 not January Oth, In 1831 1t was again closed on December 5th; in 1836 on | December Tthy in 1840 on December i 5th: in 1843, on December Oth, hut in | 1847 it was closed on December 8th, in | 1868 on December Oth, and in 1868 on { Decomber 6th, in 1885 on December | Bth, in 1886 on December 6th, In 1825 bth, in 1820 not till January 11th and {it was not closed until January { 1857 only on January 15th. jon November 21st, inlS827 on XNov-| { ember 25th, in 1835 on November 30th, | {in 1838 on November 28th, in 1842 on | 1871 on November | 30th in 1875 and November 23d, 1880, Between 1816 and 1851 (both | clusive), it was closed 2% times ia al 30 times and | November 28th, De- | in that! {both | f A 1RaT ATS 4 ber dates of closing of the latter corres- | pond very nearly with those of the earlier | The average date in the latter mer, In regard to the date of opening, which always occurred as soon as the | engaged in commerce, it occurred five | 1819 and | 1850, and only once in corresponding years between 18564 and | In the former period it was de- layed five times till April and four times | (renerally the open ing took place in March of both periods, and here again the average in favor We know of no belter gauge, eXcept- ing the record of the thermometer | itself if the average temperature of our | winters for nearly threequurters of a | century than the clesing aud opening of Iiy the Ogures we have given it will be seen that the “old-fashioned | winters,’ of the sewverily of which | wore | not different, in degree’ from the new | fashioned ones. There were early and | late winters then, and early and late | springs, but so have there been during | i FASHION NOTES. - Cloaks entirely lined with fur are worn as carriage wraps only. They are too heavy for walking. The red- ingote of fine cloth or velvet, edged with fur, 18 the most fashionable of mantles for walking or visiting. -1n plain fabrics the most in vogue are thick soft Thibet cloth with hairy surface, double twilled cheviot, thick warm Indian vigogne, double French merino, twilled cashmere and soft smooth ladies’ cloth. The latter Is also much worn in narrow stripes, Long boas are much worn, and also small fur capes or collars, as we call them here. Mufls are still made quite small, The fur muff needs no trimming: the fancy muff alone, of velvet or plush; 1s trimmed with a large bow of ribbon, a bird or a spray of flowers, — A novelty of the season is the very perfect imitation of braiding and satin stitch embroidery in monochrome over cloth and cashmere, Separate pine patterns and sprays and borders of various widths are woven into the ma- terial, but give the effect of being worked by hand, Panels, skirt fronts, plastrons and facings are wade of this imitation braiding, and the plain ma- terial 1s always to be had to match for the rest of the costume, ~ Foundation skirts are unaltered in shape, Most of them are 24 yards wide, and furnished with one steel, which is placed rather low, and not tied at all tightly. Notwithstanding the raid against pads, they are still worn, If will take some time to con- vince 8 woman that she looks well without a dress improver, and at pres- ent the appearance of the few who have discarded Lhe appendage does not impress one to the contrary. There are some new tea aprons introduced; plaiting of black lace over black or red thin silk, with a folded watered silk in depth, and long loops and ends hanging at the left side. They are often made at home, and the lace may be purchased at most of the shops already plaited, —Some hats are quite earicatures, contorted and owler; but the generality are smart and also graceful on the head. A large feit one, recently worn at a race meeting, had two slits in the turned-up brim, on one with two Jong quill feathers was gray with black silk trimming, and red coral butions. The long gray cloak, worn as a wrap, was lined with red and gray shot silk, finished off near bon of good width, which reached the ground, and fell from a bandsome double throat clasp of coral and gold. —Green in millinery, appears to be the winter are rich and becoming, es- pecially to those women who have a red- fashionable, especially for young girls, All the trimming 1s placed on the top. A novel siyle of trimming these hats is boa at the back of the hal, cary it round between the crown and brim till it meets behind, fasten it round the throat, and let the end fall over the shoulder. A few high loops of velvet are placed on one side, or well up In front, Another pretiy felt hal has the if that does not imply a late spring, it can delay ilscoming without fear of | protest or reproaci ser————————— Beaten for Ones. Josh Billings arrived in San Fran- | One of the reporiers of a daily | paper immedistely found bilm. The following are the odd answers fo the | ordinary questions: i “What do you think of our glorious climate?” “A hen with one chicken is always | “What do you think of the Chinese “Dirt is something put where it does not belong.” “What is your opinion of the leading wen of our State?” “The rooster which crows loudest don’t always taste the best when he's cooked,” “What do you think of Califorma, anyway?" “Far-oll countries are always said to be fall of marvels,” “Want is your opinion of the super- visors' report on Caninatown?"’ “The boy cried ‘Wolf!’ so often, that when the wolf did come nobody went 10 his assistance,’ “What do you think of the One- twelfth Act?” “I is better to die of overeating than to starve to death in the midst of plenty.” “What do you know, anyway?" end- ed the reporter, in despair, “Young man, it is better to conceal one's knowledge than reveal one’s igonoranue. - In furs, sealdkin is as fashionable feather ruche carried round the bro. side, overlapping the crown. -- Winter fashions being mow well defined, there is no louger any hesita- tion as to the styles wost ln vogue, our readers, A dinner dress is of ron gray allie and gross grain silk of the same color, brocaded with large purple pansies. There 15s a foundation skut of thin sik, which remains mvisible, A skirt front of faills, put on almost pian over th 8 foundation skirt, is finished at the fuvot with a desp gray silk fringe, headed with three narrow flounces, slighitly gathered, about two inches deep. A redingote of the brocaded silk remains open to show this skirt front, It is composed of a back piece cut princess fashion, and forming, from the waist, two treble plaits; the side pieces next back are also fimished each by an ample plait over the skirt. The fronts and front side pieces termi. nate at the waist under a wide scarf, which is draped across the front and puff, with one large lappet edged with fringe falling down to the front of the skirt. The fronts of the bodices open HORSE NOTES, ~Ogsler, the young jocky who broke a leg by being thrown from Prince Karl at Guttenberg recently, will not be able to ride again this winter, ‘~'L'hiis year Jerome Park will begin on May 15, and close on Decoration day, May 39. Brooklyn will bessin on Saturday, June 1, and race until Juno 15, when Coney Island wiil follow. ~Wilham Hendrie, of Hamilton, Ont., bas purchased, In Kentucky, the b. 1a, Canoble Les, by Springbok, dam Leena, by Ousterman, Jr. Canoble Lee is the dam of the fast filly Banjo. -—J. B. Haggin and Marcus Daly, of Anaconda, Mon, have purchased, through I’. J. Willlams, from Joh 8, Clark the famous trotting mare Fa. vonia, 2.15, by Wedgewood, dam Fadette, tby Alexander's Abdaliah, Messrs, Haggin and Daly are the owners of an extensive horse breeding ranch at Anaconda, and Favonia will winter in the bracing climate of Mon- tana, ~—At Clifton, on December 17, after Cricket had run in the second race she dropped dead while being unsaddied, Cricket was a gray mare, foaled in 1882, by Duke of Magenta, out of Felicity, by imp. Eclipse, she out of Fidelity, by imp. Glencoe, and was a famous sprinter in her 3 and 4 year old form, when raced by trainer James Rowe. ~The Philadelphia Driving Park Association will give two trotting and pacing meetings next year, one in May and one in September. The associa tion is now free from debt, and the Board of Directors recommend that lar. ger premiums shall be given in order to attract the very best horses. A new Board of officers will be elected this month, — At the Turf Congress held at Cin. cinnati in December, rule was passed making all persons ruled off the tracks for fraud by the National and Ameri- can Trotting Associations ineligible to appear upon the race-courses belonging to the Congress, The Kansas City and Denver Overland Clubs applied for membership, | ==During the past twelve months ab | the various combination sales of saddle, road, harness and trotting bred stock, held in Kentucky, 1304 horses passed under the hammer for $473,557, an average of $303.14 During the same period of time 732 thoroughbreds sold for $423,125, an average of $578 03, { The total namber of head thus sold, including all breeds of horses, is 2006 head, and they brought the enormous {sum ot §912,927, a grand average of | $462.81, — Walter Gratz’s runners are winter. | ing at daratoga. The string the com- | ing season will comprise the following, | whose ages, corrected from January 1, | 1880, will be as noted: Elkwood, 6 | years; Fletch Taylor, aged; Aasirienve, | 5 years; Pocatello, 4 years. Wynwood, | 4 years; Rustic, 3 years; Goneaway, 3 | years; Blue Lock (brother to Sir Dixon) | 3 years; The Forum, 3 years; Century, | 3 years; Farceur, 2 years; Trapeset, 2 | years; Cervantes, 2 years; Polson, 2 years; Warsaw, 2 years; Arcade, 3 | years; Maddlesione, 2 years; and Rhoda | Gily, 2 years, -The New Eaoglasd Association ol | Trotting Horse Breeders at its annual | business meeting beld at Boston, elec- ited the following officers: President, i B. D. Whitcomb; Vice Presidents— | Maine, C. H. Nelson and W. C, Mar- | shall; New Hampshire, John B. Clark {and Warren F. Daniel; Vermont, J. iC, Parker and W. 8S. Batley: Massa. {chusetts, J. G. Davis and F. BR. Far- | num; Rhode Island, James Hanley and | Henry Ball; Counecticut, 8. H. Rane | dell and ;. 1. Clark; Secretary, 8S. W. | Parlin; Treasurer, J. R. Graham. | ~The Dwyer Brothers are looking (about for a track on wheh to have | winter racing, Their idea is to race | late in the antumun before the regular {season has closed, and early in the {spring before it has begun. They { argue that if Clifto» and Guitenburg cau do so well with the slight atirac- tions they offer, what might not a more pretentious race-course do with larger purses, better horses, better ac- commodations, ele.? The track will undoubtedly be located in New Jersey. M., T. Dwyer, Hot Springs, Ark., will remain until March, —James H. Goldsmith drove thir teen horses to their best records last season, as follows: Atlantic, 2.211 (on a hall-mile track); Beauly Bright, 2214: William, 2.18§; Cleon, 2.23; Geau Smith, 2,184; Company, 2.19%; Lever, 232}; Suverthread (pacer), 2.1564 Gillig, 2.323 May Gould, 2.24}: Lougford, 2.214: florton, 2.856%; Bily Stewart (pacer), 2.194, and Unle D. (pacer), 222}. At whe Poughkeepsie meeting he started six horses, and won five first moneys and one second — a larger number of successful *“‘wins”’ than was made by any driver at aay one meeting in the Circuit of 1888, The borses were Company, Gean Smith, Cleon. Longford, Sidverthread and Beauty Brigut. — While driving In Uentral Park N.