Uifrr, Oh (IfßUc Tim* l ! Linger oh gentle Unw Linger. oh rwdixnt grace of bright to-day ! IM not the hour * chime Oall thee *w*y: * Bat linger near me xtill with fond daisy. Unger, for then art mm*' What dearer treasures oan the future hold ? What sweeter (towers than thins Oan she unfold ? What secrets tU my heart thou hast not told 7 Oh, linger in thy flight ' . For shadows gather round, and ahonld we \>art. A dreary, starlees night May All my heart. Then pause and linger yet ere thou depart. 1 auger, 1 ask no more Thou art enough forever—then alone. What future oan restore. When thon art flown. All that I hold from thee and call my own 1' Two Drummers. a iJEOKsr or Tex *oa. It was two rival drummers The merits that did blow Of safe# were m St Louis made A nd safe* from Chicago They chanced upon a merchant Who fain a safe would buy, And in the pr. e of their houses ware* The drumnu'i* team did vie. Each striving to see which could construct The most colossal lie. Cp spake the Bt. I.oms drummer " Once a man a cat did take Aud locked the animal in a safe Of our superior make. •• They made a bar. Are round the safe With tar and kerosene. And for four-and-tweniT hours it blaied With raging heat. I ween. " The Are went out. the safe wae cooled. And I will forfeit five Hundred g xxj dollars if that cat Did trot come out alive Then m id up; pake and answered turn The Chicago safe agent: " 11 ith our safe one day wa did esaay The same experiment. "We placed the safe selected on Of coals a flery bod. And pithed-pm* we heaped iu coal-oil steeped TtU the irou gloweit bright red And in forty-eight hours we ope d the safe And, alas ! tlie cat was dead •' Was dead 7 Aht'" his rival cried. With a thumplisnt breath. But the Chicago man reiksed ••Yea, the cat as fruteti to death 1" No word that Bt. Louis drummer spoke. Bat silent he sto -d and wan. While the Ka:.>as merchant an or.kr gave To the Chicago man. Better Late Than Never. His name was Johu Holt ; and, more over, Le looked like Lis name, or like the image which lUe sound of his name, in a musical ear, would call up in the mind. Physically he wa- so well pro portioned that uis wt ifht cvuld scarce ly be gnesseo, and so broad-shouldered that you i*d to set him Inside another man in order to realize his superior height. His skin was fair and his eyes blue, but the hair, which had been tow colored ui his childiiood, hail deepened tii brown. J- hn Holt's face was not one of those a c! are called expressive, but wore, m r p< so, pret'j nearly al ways the v.nie look. Mrs. Holt had a large and valuable farm just on the borders of the town. Streets had crept gradually about her Gelds and surrounded them on three sides ;on the fourth woodlands stretched back toward the east. Why she should give the control of this place to John, instead of to one of his sharper brothers, was a pnzzle even in her own mind. The only reason she could give was that John was steady and more likely to re main at home than the others were. John was in love with pretty Nellie Cramer, a neighlxir's daughter ; but one day when he started to tell her of his passion she stopped him short with a laugh and a " Nonsense, John !" He never got angry with her. How couM he ? But sometime* a shadow would drop over his face, and he wouldn't have much to say to her for a time. Then, when she went to him with her coaxing ways, and laid her little hand on his arm, whispering: " Now, don't be vexed, John; I like you so much; but I don't want you to talk nonsense," he would look down and smile, though not very brightiy, and promise to try to avoid nonsense in the future ; ending his promise with a sigh. " Dear me ! I do wish you wouldn't sigh so, John the girl would say, pet tishly. "It makes me feel melancholy to hear yon. One wonld think I had done something dreaJful to you." Then John Holt would smile again, still lees brightly, and promise to try not to sigh any more. Such little scenes as this were mere asides, however. Nellie usually paid but little attention to John, being chiefly occupied in dancing, flirting and quar reling with hit more showv brother Frank, or with any other gay fellow who was so unfortunate as to lie taken with her pretty face. For Nellie was an in corrigible flirt. It was only when she had no one else to talk to, or wanted to pique some other lover, or when she wanted some real service, that she went to John, who was sometimes pleased and sometimes hnrt to see that she came to him only when she wanted help or advice. " Yon are a sort of grandfather, you know," she said one day, giving his arm a squeeze. " I have an idea that you are a<>out seventy-five years old. How old are you, John ?" " I ain only one-third of that," he said, smiling. " I am only a mouth past twentv-flve. "Possible? Well, you must have been very old when you was born. Be sides, twenty five is old to me. I am only nineteen. Now yon come and hear my story and tell me what to do. I came over here on purpose to see yon." John followed her obediently through the garden and down to a bench under the s-hadow of the beech grove on the lawn; and when she took her seat there he leaned against the trunk of a tree and waited, looking down on her. " You see, John," she began, " I've had an offer." John Holt was tanned that summer, but through the brownness one might have seen a faint blush run over his face. Nellie didn't see it, for she was looking down and rolling her apron tas sels, a very bright color in her own face. There was a moment's silence after this announcement, and seeing that be was expected to say something, John presently said " Yes ?" 14 Ob, if yon don't want to advise me, I won't trouble yon," the girl flung out, rising in a pet. " Coiae back, Nellie," he said, kind ly. "I am not cross, only tell me what yon want." She seated herself again with a little quiver in her lip. " I waDt you tell me what yon think of James Lee Tell me if yon think I'd better marry him. Tell me if you think he cares enough for me to go just where I say and live where I wish." The color waved again in John Holt's face, and he drew a quick breath. Some impulse to speak seemed to come upon him. Glancing np for his answer, Nellie sow the change and added a word: • You see, J>hn, I like Albert Leigh ton better than I do James." The color and light droppod out of his face again, and a rim of even, white teeth oressed for an instant his under lip. "Then wbv don't you marry Albert Leighton ?" *he asked, looking up into the tree that spread over his head, and reaching to break a slender twig. "Ho never asked me to," she an swered demurely. " I suppose he means to, doesn't he ?" asked John, looking at her with a glance that might be called almost haughty. " How can I tell ?" Nellie pouted. " Men are BO queer. The most of them would rather wait to be asked, I think." "If you want my advice, I will give it," John said, twisting and flinging away the little twig in his hand. "fi KURTZ, Editor mi roj>riotor. VOLUME XII. yon like Albert, don't kn>p Junior !*v> m suspense, You ktve no right to do it. Yon can't seriously think of mar ryiug one man when you prefer another. If Albert likes vou, so I believe he doee, take him. Re'* * g.xxl fellow." " Yon think sot" the girl said, l.x>k tug up suddenly. "1 think *o," he repiatcak to littu of it." " Try to coax him to stay, Nellie," said the mother, iu a tone of more en treaty than pcrliai** she hail ever used in her life before. " lie is a g>od sou, and 1 can't get along without him. 1 tlnuk you can keep him if you will." This prayer w, uld have tweu effeiug her, and looked wistfully into her face. Though he hail denied his mother so decidedly, her words had not been with out weight. Women understand each other. Could it be possible 7 And there was Nellie coming dowrn the walk. Her head was erect, and her face per fectly compiled, though slightly pale. "lam so sorry," she began. " Your mother has been telling me vour plans. Of course, yon know best what is good for yon, and I have been telling her to let vou have yonr own way Hut we shall all be sorry to lose you, John." That was all. He gave a last grasp at his self-command, and held it. There was a short formal conversation ; Isitli so engaged in making a pretense of be ing kiud and friendly, and just as usual, that each could not perceive that the other was also making a pretense ; and four weeks after they parted with tol erable comjKwure, an 1 Johu Holt went to California, He stayed there five years, and sent his mother her gold spoon. He stayed three year- longer, ami then came home himself. Nellie was Nellie Cramer still, they told him, and was much sobered. Some way she hadn't seemed to care much about tlirting for several years. Her fa her ami motbi r were e thoroughly organized, employing a oountless army of trained officers and " airmen." The adventnrous and well to-do will have their pleasure yachts of the air, and take hazardous and de lightful cruises. Their vessels will differ from the cumbrous acrobats in tended for freight and emigrant busi ness, will !>e christened with beautiful and suggestive names—lris, Aurora, Hebe, Ganymede, Hermes, Ariel, and the like—and will vie with one another in grace, readiness and speed. " Mamma says it is not polite to ask for cake," Baid a little boy. 14 No," was the reply, "itdoes not look well in little boys to do so." " But," said the nrchin, " she didn't say I must not eat piece if you gave it me." CENTRE HALL, CENTRE CO., PA., THURSDAY, EERRUARY 20, IK7O. JORDAN AND THEDEAD SEA Z Tkf SarrrS and r .......... Haian affair* liar. l'he following extract is from " Syrian Sunshine," by T. U. Appletou: The Nile is u siU'itvl liver, and the Tiber i* famous, but the most sacred and most fatuous river of the world is the Jordan. Prom the beginning to the end, it has that mystical character which belli* such lofty pretensions; its life is the most vivid and complete, and its death the most sudden and mysterious that can tie imagined. It ia torrential, and it leave* the banks of the Heruiou and the many fountain* of its tributaries with an eager precipitation, as if it laire a mission. Prom its gi eat cat height, some hundred feet above the sea level, it leapa downward till it disappear* iu the Dead a-a some thirteen hundred feet below it. It hides itself amoug oleander,tamarisk aud willow, ami many an unfamiliar Oriental tree, as if wish ing to keep from profane eyes the secret of its errand. It does not stop long to overflow its banks ami fertilise the val ley, for it has a purpose too mystical to waste itself even upon acts of lieuevo lence. It is only willing to lieoouie a living barrier I tween the desert tribes and the favored nation wlucli loved it. No boat hvie on its lasum. No fisher men dwell by its margin; but it moves, oua headlong column of sacred waters from its cradle of snow ami cloud, high in the heaven, till it diei in a fatal lake marked by the finger of (tod, and for ever a subject for man's curiosity and reverence. It would nM'm a tiling apart and not to le confounded with vulvar waters, which lose tiicir personality in the bottom of the mighty Ken, but exhaling to heaven like aome holy meiMMUiger who periahnl in the fulfillment of his duty. Ith birth and it* death alike Depurate it from its # sister rivers of earth, and only the voioeletu. mounds of perished anil nameless cities, tribes stationary as if bidden to halt by aome supreme destiny of the past,or the awed and questioning (granger from tlie many Christian lands whose baptism drew its authority from the sprinkling of its waters, are seen u|>on its banks. And then we wandered through many whispering reeds, through a kind of jungle where sterility nd the river hail fought for mastery, and which showed traces of Isitii; a tangle of bushes as it were, lighting tlmu way up, and great spaces of barrenness which the summet would scorch to lifelessness. And at last the Dead sea. Though we know that it is of volcanic origin, and fed by mines of salt, the imagina tion now, a* ever, is content to see m it a thing accursed. There was a fresh breeze; and a reluctant litt and heavy tumble of its tiny breakers made them unlike other waves, but rather like those of Dante's Infernal sea. There was a breath lieavv with doom in the air, and wo were fortunate it was not more sliding. Was it the breath of those lost or tortured there? And be neath that saline sheet, did we not see, as in the picture of Ibducroix, the ago nising and twisted figures of the con demned ? We did not bathe in the Dead sea. Others have done so, and report of its buoyancy the s one tales that are told of our otru Salt lake. There is a whimsi cal coincidence in the geographical re lation of the Dead s< a and the home of the earlier prophets, and Mr. Itnghain Young's personal continuation of the old dispensation, with a private Dead sea of his own, in his immediate neigh borhood. The {merest mimmer kecanse the cure of Ht, Germain l'Auxerrois refuse* 1 to perform the funeral service of a merchant's wife nntil he had ascertained whether she hal left any money to the church. At the epoch of the Fronde this street was the scene of freqnent outbreaks. It was there that Cardinal l)e Retz, passing through it one evening in 1648, was threatened by a roaster brandishing a long spit. The cardiual had not the wildest idea who his enemy was, bat hail the gumption to say, " Villain, if your floor father con Id only see you now !"—when the fellow, imagining that he was a friend of his family, implored pardon. In the last house on the right hand side, abutting on the Rtie de Haint Flonore, lived in 1672 Francis Harnom, chief barber to lonia XIV. At No. 52, conspicuous bv its curious locksmithmg anil sculptures! balcony, lived Trad on, butler to Louis XV. In 176'J there were three famous cafe* in the street, frequented by learned men and artists of various kinds, and finally No. 3 is pointed out as the famous quarters of Mooaquetaires D'Artagnan A Co., whom Dumas has made familiar to every school-boy. An Awkward Blunder. In Paris a young lady went into one of the great drapery houses to shop ith her maid. They keep watchers there; and one of these, making sure he had seen something, presently tapped the yonng lady on the shoulder and asked her to follow him to the search ng-room. "Yon have just put a pair of new gloves in your pocket, mademoi selle; don't deny it." " I know I have," said the young lady quietly; "and if you will be good enough to look inside them you will see that, as thoy were I>ought at anothor house, they could hardly have been stolen from this." The watcher had made a mistake; and he and the whole gang of searchers lav gan to grovel in excuses. " Now," said the lady, turning to her maid, " go to the nearest commissary of police and tell him that the daughter of Prince Orloff requires his protection." It was the very uwkwardeet of blunders; her father was tbo Russian ambassador. The contrite drapery company offered thousands to hush it up. POTATOES AMI 111 Pll I'll Kill A. N.trl Tkr.o ml a Vrlls.k. l>lr. wit I l.lwa lllphlhrrls U I'reSsrf* kl Kl rmlt' I *• *f I'wlslwr*. Melville O. Keith, M. D., of Lincoln, Neb., writes to theOhioago Inter-Ocean ss follows: Home seventeen years ago the atp-utiou of my father, Dr. Alvau Keith, late of Augusta, Me., was called to the fact that children who were not fond of thetnber known as Irish potatoes were not subject to attucksof that uuicb dreaded malady diphtheria. Following out this liiut, he advised fsmilies of his friends to avoid the use of this vegeta ble among the childreu, and until his devasc he was a*vustomed to make the assertion that rotten potato.-* produce the throat disease known as diphtheria. It may not be inappropriate to remark that he was considered a very success fnl practitioner in the treatmeut of this disease. in lNtiS the writer visited Hsu Fran cisco, and was there engaged in the practice of medicine until lhtiT. During that period of time he had au opportun ity of fully testing tlie truth of the statement of potatoes being a producer, or at least su approximate cause of the condition known aa diphtheria. In 305 cases in ami aUiut pan Francisco, the fact was noted that every one who had the true diphtheria was an eater of Irish potatoes. The writer is well aware of the presumptive charge of novelty, to say the least of the assertion, and for this reason ha* hesitated to place himself on record. The condition of many fami lies in the West, and more especially in this Htate and Kansas, urges the under signed. as a matter of interest to the hu man family to make public a aeries of observations for the past two yt am in the West. During this time thirty cases hate come under my direct #ii|>ervisiou and prescriptions. More than 'dim have lieen carefully inquired aft -r, and in every case it has lieen proven that the diphtheritic [•atirnt Lad lieen a potato eater; and in a large majority of in stances Uie patient nad been known as an excessive eater of the tuber. A rale to hold good should lie valid from both sides. The undersigned made the fore going statements to a very intelligent lady of tiii# city, n >w a teacher in a dis tant city, and the result has lieen that where the diphtheria prevailed fatally Inst vear they have (by the influence of tin* lady) largely refrained from eating p' 'tatocs, or only eateu them to a very moderate extent, and the disease is al most unknown. In my practice in this city and county the offer has lieen to treat any ooe free of compensation, if they would avoid the use of Irish pota toes. As a sequence not one of the pa th uls who wus not a potato-eater ha# beeu threatened with the disease. In many of the inland towu# of thi# State, the writer lias patients, and in some of the infected district# the families of those who hsve learn\l of this simple preventive have escaped any attack of throat disease, although the potato-eat ers on either *ide of them have unfor tunatelv had cases of diphtheria rnnicli result--d fatallv. it would not IH* in accordance with tlie well-known proclivities of modi-al men if the writer did uot have a theory to account for these facts, and a special treatment to correspond with the lelief of the constitutional cause. He has; but the theory, like many others, is onlv partially developed (>r proven, aud con Id easily l>e argued. The facta, em bracing a (teriod of seventeen rears and a knowledge of 1,100 cases, are, m the writer 's cstiumtibn, incontrovertible, and may lx* summed up a-, follows: The writer maintains that the person who does not UK the tuler known as Irish potato can never have the disease known ns diphtheria, that in every case of diphtheria (tniel will be found an habitual ester of Irish potatoes. Care ef the Fje Tlie sight in ro->st persons lgins to fail from forty to fifty yesrs of age, as is evidenced by an instinctive preference for large print ; a seat near the window for reading is selected ; there is an effort to place the paper at a convenient dis tance from the eye. or to turn it so as to get a particular reflection of the light ; next the finger t>egina to placed un der the line read, and there is a winking of the eye as if to clear it, or a looking awav at some distant object to clear it ; or tne fingers are pressed over the clnatvl lids in the direction of the nose, to re move the tears caused by strnmiug. Favor the failing sight as mnch as possible. Rooking into a bright fire, especially a coal fire, is Tery injurious to the eyes. Rooking st molten iron will soon destroy the sight ; reading in the twilight is injurious to the eyes, as they are obliged to make great exertion. Heading or sewing with a side light in jures tiie eyes, as both eyes should be exposed to an equal degree of light* The reason is, the sympathy between the eyes is so great that if the pnpil of one is dilated by being kept f arliaily in tbe shade, the one that is most exposed cannot contract itself sufficiently for pro tection, anil will ultimately Is* injured. Those who wish to preserve their sight should observe the following rules, and preserve their general health by correct habits: Ist, Ry aittiug in snch a position as will allow the light to fall obliquely over the ahoulder upon the sew ing. 2d. Ry not nsing the eyes for such purposes hv anv artificial light. 3d. By avoiding the special use of the eyes in the morning before break fast. 4th. By resting them for half a min ute or so while reading or sewing or looking at small objects; anil by looking at things at a distance, or np to the sky ; relief is immediately felt by so doing. sth. Never pick any collected matter from the eyelashes or corners of the eyes with the finger-nails ; rather moist en it with the saliva and rub it away with the ball ef the finger. 6th. Frequently pas* the ball of the finger over the closed eyelids toward the nose ; this carries off an excess of water into the nose itself by means of the little canal which leads into tbe nostril from each inner corner of the eye, this canal having a tendency to close np in con sequence of the light inflammation which attends the weakness of the eyes. 7th. Keep the feet always dry and warm, so as to draw any excess of blood from the other eml of the laxly, fltli. Use eyeglasses at first carried in the vest pocket attached to the guard, for they are instantly adjusted to the eye with very little tronble, whereas, if com mon spectacles are used snob a process is required to get them ready that to have trouble the eyes are often strained to answer a purpose. Mh. Wash the eyes abundantly every morning. If cold water is used let it bo flapped ngaiust tbo closed eyes with the fingers, not striking bard against the balls of the eyes. 10th. The moment the eyes feel tired, the very moment yon are conscious of an effort to read or sew, lay aside the lxtok or noodle, and take a walk for an hour, or employ yourself in some activo exercise not requiring the close use of the eyes. It is a curious usage in Hpain for the exeontioner to solicit a criminal's par don before putting him to death. The ceremony was recently performed in the case of the garrutiug of Moucasi, who tried to kill King Humbert. THE HAIR. Viae < orlww* faru Is M*l*llss Is Osl llla*sir IssrsSasr Nslgsss* II ha* sometimes Iwii wondered where all the false hair cornea from wlUi which the deficiencies ' the natu ral nlllll >1 y are eked out. Fomigiifluaii trie* furnish the hulk of the material for the American market, as there are few people here who, whether from in clination or iiese of their lockii for money. Light hair cornea from tlcriuaiiy, while llrittany and tho aoiith of France supply the black ; and it la a eurioUH sight to #ee the youuif peaaaut girla tieing sheared tike sheep Ity uieu a well an women. The univer sal custom of wearing capa which com pletely conceal tlieir abundant locka, doubtless accountn for the readinoaa of the French peaaaut girls to aell for a aoug the llneat ornament of their aex. Now and then aome story geta into print aliout the dangera of wearing false hair, and the account* of lnaecte which have been aaid to lubatiit it are by no means attractive reading. Hut tbeae atoriee are, a* a rule, either luvt-n- Uouh or exaggerations, lor in every re putable hair store there la a guarantee of cleanliness which any eye can lie sat isfied of. There are, no doubt, un plcaaaut associations connected with wlist is known in the trade aa " grave yard hair," that is, the hair which is taken from a person's head sfter death ; but this kind being brittle and deficient in the qualities necessary for daily use, is probably only fonnd in cheap quar ters. Very euriouy, as showing the Couuectlou between the emotions and the hair, are those instances in which terror or some great mental distuibau< ha* suddenly blanched it. Marie An toinette's experience in having tier hemj Ihmmoiv gray lite night preceding bfr execution la sufficiently familiar. An other example, referred to by Dr. Wyutcr as coming under his own obser vation, was that of a soldier who feigntal rheumatism, and lingered in a hospital fur three mouths, to escape military ser vice. This anxiety to keep up the de ception caused his hair to turn gray, al though he was quite a yung man. These emotional affections of the hair are supposed to lie caused by the action of some fluid in the blood u|ou the pig ments. Patches of white hair are some times, though rarely, found upon new born hat>ea, and it is the abeeuce of pig ment which produces the whiteness so familiar in the Albino. As to the cause* of tialdnees, they are to some extent connected with artificial habits of life. The larger deposit of fat in the female scalp, which allows of a free circulation in the capillaries of the skin, is held by medical authorities to account for the general exemption of women from baldneaa, an comjared with men. The smooth new* of a scalp de nuded of ite natural covering, shows a denselxas of texture in the akin caused by the destruction of the bulk of the hair, and the closure of the follicles —in this condition, all remedies are use less, The ailk hat ao eonstantlv worn by men is probably responsible for much of the prevailing baldness, and the fact that this cease- l*e'ow the place of contact with the head, indicates the mode of operation, the exclusion of air and consequent excessive production of heat. Coolness of the head is a re quisite for a healthy growth of hair, which is apt to c ine out in fevers and other morbid stateanf the system. Noth ing better can be devised for the benefit of the hair than the daily use of cold water, followed by vigorous rubbing. The use of auiroal fats is injurious by reason of their heating properties, and a light cleansing and gently stimulating wash is the most which is needed by way of artificial application to promote the health and growth of the hair. The blood, says a medical writer, is the only macassar of the hair, the only oil which can with truth IK> aaid to " insinuate its balsamic properties into the pores of the head." The fine network of vessels on which tlie bulbs of the hair real is aloue capable of maintaiug its healthy exist ence. Tlie same "writer adds : "We do not see why internal preparations should not be tried, and we are not at all certain that gelatine soups and pills made of the ashes of bnrnt hair, might uot lie effectual in taldnesr., as those in gredients would supply to the blood the materials necessary for the production of hirsute growths." barring the ere mntion and reatauraut suggestions, which are here unpleasantly connected! with hair, it might l>e wortli while for persons who have grown gray in read ing the 7\n tr, or become bald by not reading it, to test tho soundness of these kits of wisdom in relation to the •nbject.— Bmton Timet. Theatricals In < hina. The Celestial empire has much the resemblance to an immense fair, where, amid a perianal flux and reflux of buy ers and sellers, of brokers, loungers and thieves, yon see in til quarters stages and mountebanks, jokers and comedians, labonug uninterruptedly to amuse the public. Over the whole surface of the oonutry, in the burgh* and villages, rich and poor, mandariDs aud people—all, without exception, are passionately fond of drnraatic representations. There are thi-aters everywhere; the great towns are full of them. There is ne little vil lage but has its theater, which is usually opposite to the pagoda, and sometimes even form* a part of it. In some canes the permanent theaters are not found sufficient, and then the Chinese con struct temporary ones, with wonderful facility, out of bamboo. The Chinese theater is extreme v simple, and it* ar rangement* exclud all idea of soenie illusion. The decoi tions are fixed, and do not change as lon as the piece last*. One w. illd never kn >w what they were intended for, if the i etors did not take cere to inform the p iblic, and correct the motionlee* character of the scene* by verbal explanations. The only ar rangement ever made with a view to scenic effect is the introduction of a trap-door in front of the stage, for the entrances and exit* of sui>erua!nral per sonages, and goes by the name of the • • Gate of Demons." Birds and Hard Winter*. The tendouev to augur n hard winter from the arrival of birds which usually winter in countries far north of us, is, we flunk with the Rev. P. O. Morris, himself a (Trent observer of the habits of birda, generally a mistake. What snch arrivals do prove, is licit what is going to be so much as what has already happen ed in these northern regions—the birds flying before the cold, rather than taking precautions against it before tliey fee) it. No donbt this may imply a severe winter for na, a well as for these north erly regions, especially if northerly winds prevail, as they are very apt to do when thero is unusual cold, and, therfore, an unusually dense atmos phere to the uorth of ns, which rushes IU on the rarer atmosphere of onr more humid climate. liut that is only saying that the birds fly from weather which is not likely to extend itself tons, not that they anticipate severe weather lief ore they feel it. When robins come into onr houses we do not take it AH proving that a long frost is coming, but only that a hard frost is already there; and we suspect tlint the northerly birds fly south for precisely the same reasons for which the robins enter onr houses when they find the cold insupportable out of doom.— London Spn'tator. TKRMB: #2.00 a Ymr, *in .Advance. The Joke on A i tenia* Hard. Arlemu* wa* leetunug, with his pan orama of Halt Lake, in Canada, and as busmen* was food he wa* in correspond ingly high epirtU and hi* jiockela were full of ooin. The day Isidore they were to leave .Smith, his advanoc agent, told Ward that as silks were so much cheaper m the Itritiah possessions than in trie United Htatos he hail purchased a large piece of silk and wa* going to take it to his wife a* a present. Ward was pleased with the idea and in the same confidence told Hmith that he had also purchased a piece of melton cloth, and lioth conferred with each other a* to the I wet way to accrete the goods so as to pa*a the custom house. Ward suggested to Hauth to wrap the silk sround his body, and Hmith in turn advised Artemu* to place his cloth within the fold* of his pauorams of Halt Lake. They each agreed to take tha other's ad vice, and Hmith left the next morning to go over to the Hlates iu advauoe. The bundle of silk wound around him made him feel quite uucomforUble, especially when he came to the custom house and commenced interrogating about his bag The official was very polite and paused hi* baggage without a murmur and then invited him into his private office, hand ed him a cigar aud beggod him to take a seat. The heat of the room l>egan to make Hmith uncomfortable, and he rose to go "He seated, sir," said the official. " I want to have a little chat with you." •• No, I must ls going," said the ge nial John. " I can't stand sitting so long, and then I've a great deal to at tend to." "You seem to be a very aloutiah kind of a man," said the officer. "Yes," said Hmith, his face getting red and the warmth of the silk increas ing. "I'm pretty solid, but I can't staud a hot room." " Ah 1" said the inspector, " what's the trouble 7 Anything the matter with your chest or lungs t" "(July a slight oppression," said Hmith. "Oppression about the lung#!" ex claimed the officer, rising and advancing towara the miff jesting agent. " Let me make au examination for yon, sir; it may tie dangerous. I'lease remove jrour coat." '• It'# nothing; it vrill soon pass away," replied (Smith, inwardly praying for a chance to escape. "My dear friend, you ahould not allow vonrself to suffer a moment,"aaid the officer, "and I insist upon examin ing your chest. Doubtless I can relieve yon of ail your trouble." The inspector insisted, and the dia comflteu agent, after vainly trying to escape from h;s solicitations, finally acknowledged the corn, aud confessed to haviug the concealed silk upon his person. The offioer laughed b*rtily and aaid: " I knew it all the while. Here's a let ter I received this morning." And he handed Smith a letter written by Ward, informing the inspector that a smuggler would endeavor to paas a quantity of silk, describing Smith's appearance, and claiming one-half of the reward for the information. Smith was indignant of course, bnt determined ho get even with the incorrigible joker, ao he told the officer about Ward having the roll of cloth concealed in his panorama. The inspector appreciated tlie joke and let Smith go with a small penaltv. The next morning Artemns Ward arrived at the custom house with his panorama, when the iuspeetor intsrro gating him and insisted upon his letting him have a glipae of his tiesutiful pic tures. Ward trie*! every exeat* bat the offi rial wits importunate and finally be was compelled to have hia man unwind one section of tbe panorama before tbe in upertor. Artemns atood by and explained tbe views until snddenly the elotk came to light, and as it ws slowlv unwound in front of the pictures WarA struck an at titude like his performance upon the stage and in tbe drawl of the exhibitor said : " This Tiew is slightly encum bered with twenty yards o? melton cloth. That Smith told you all about it. What's the damages t" The inspector soon settled the ques tion of charges aud for onoe Arte in us found himself caught by his own joke. The Laundries in New York. The manager of one of the larger lanndries of New York lately said that there were between five ami six hun dred important lanndries in the city, oonnting steam laundries that do the work of large manufacturers of white goods and of hotel* and restaurants, aud the hand lanndries doing house hold work. The first steam lanndries were started in Boston, in 1H53. Several steam laundries in New York employ from It oto 150 hands. The Empire laundry, doing the work of fifteen hotels and restaurants, turns ont 40,000 pieces a day, or more than 1,000,000 a month, washed, dried and finished. These pieces include sheets, pillow cases, white towels, silver towels, brown towels, brown table cloths, white table cloths, napkins,enrtsins, jackets, aprons, counterpanes, blankets, bod covers, pillow covers, chair covers, table covers, crumb cloths snd dollies. In the per formance of this work there are used $4,000 worth of soap. SI,OOO worth of starch, $250 worth of bluing a year, and the pay roll amounts to $25,000 yearly. Another laundry manager said that the amount of private washiug done iu the public lanndries has increased im mensely since the establishment of th first large public lanudry, the New York, at Bergen, N. J., iu 1866. The largest are the Ht. Denis, California, Home, Httiyvesant aud New York. Tbe work they do is maiuly for persons living in fiats, boarders, bachelors, aud transieut hotel guests. Notwithstanding the great facilities offend by the public laundries, most housekeepers prefer to have their washing done at home. The public laundries that do private wash iug do not use stcsm or any machinery except the simple " patent wringer and " housewifes washboard," because no machinery ever invented could do the necessary fluting, puffing, scallop ing, and doing up. The charges range from seventv-five cents to s!> a dozen. The lanmiry business requires very little capital; the work is simple anil the terms are invariably cash. No class of busiuess men lose so little money from bail debts as the laundry men, and the reason is plain ; they always have ample aecurity for their bills in the clothing that they wash, and clothing is never returned nntil the bill is paid. It is estimated that from one and a half to five million dollars are invested in laundries in New York, giving em ployment to from ten to twenty thou sand persons. A clock made entirely of bread has lately been received in Milan, Italy, from Peru. It was constructed by an ludian, who, having no means of purchasing material, saved a portion of the soft part of liis daily bread for the purpose. He solidified it with a certain salt which reudered it very hard and insoluble in water. The cliick keeps good time, and the case, also of hardened bread, dis plays artistic talent. NUMBER . FOK THE FAIR HEX. PaaMaa >na. Coiffure* torn! to compactness, and are worn lower in the back. Braida or abort curia down the bank are worn with drenay eveuing ouiffarea. Hmali bouflant draperies or paniera are arranged back of the waiatoont on all drenay I'artoian toil eta. Oriental ailka, Persian and Egyptian ailka, aatina, velvet*, brocade* and oor duroya are all used for w*toteoat*. Very a mail figure*, cbeoka and stripes on white ground*, are the feature* in the new spring oaliooea and peroalna. •• Pekin," the name given to velvet*, ailka, and woolens baring alternate doll and laatroaa atripea, is all the rage at Paris. A double eape of heavy ailk chenille, with tinael thread twisted in the same, is the latest novelty far the neck in place of a scarf. The long waistcoats worn with dreaay toilets dr.- separate garments, and may le worn with several different kinds of .viato and skirts. White aatin dresses of creamy or leaden tint are worn by elderly ladies for full dresa, with full trimming* of creamy old point laeea. Birds of paradise, butterflies, and in sect* of all sort* in the form of gold figures auk Impegan feather "mam acta are worn in the hair for full dreaa. The belted Josephine corsage, the corset basque, and the corsage with long point* back and front are all worn for -evening toilet* with low, square necks. For street wear, under all circum stances, • very simple dress, although it tie a little shabby, it ta preferable to one more elaborately draped and trimmed that haa lost it* freshness. All morning toilet* for the street should be short and very dark or black. The materials may be vigogne, cash mere, camel'a hair, and all woolen goods, but the trimmings may be of silk. The fancy of the moment in short costume* in a skirt and jacket of seal brown cloth, the wrap also of the same in English coat shape, trimmed grith a collar, revere, cuffs and pocket straps of fur seal. The newest hat* for yonng girls in their teena are of felt, nigh crowned, with square tops, trimmed with three row* of inch-wide ribbon in band* placed quite far apart around the crown. The brims roll iu Derby shape. Other felt hats have a scarf of brown or navy bine satin with white polka dot*. Cravst bowa have superseded the crsvats that pass around the neck; if the latter are used, they are placed in side the dreaa, instead of concealing the neat collar of the dress, and only the cravat bow is seen. White muslin cravat bow# it# pref>rml for plain suit# in the morning and for dreaay af ternoon wear. When eolorwd cravat* are cboaen, they are folded like gen tlemen's aoarfn to fit in the revera ooi lar of a coat. or else they are a# narrow a# tbe lawn neck-tie* worn in fall dree#; the latter are made of foulard, and em broidered on each end. Newt 4 >•! far Oe rater, tbe opera singer, haa S6OO a week. Minnie Bank haa S2OO. A New York jeweler exhibit* a Chinese empress* robe, broidered in gold. A New York lady haa nineteen rata, onileoted with reference to their delicate shade* and torn* of color. Professor Billroth, of Vienna, baa founded a society for the edncatiou of nurse* for wounded soldiers. Iu the retail dry poods stores of Berlin only young girl# are emplojed behind th* rountera to display and sell goods. After a long and severe examination a Viennese lady had been admitted by the nniversity of Zurich to tbe degree of doctor of philosophy. Bouquet* of dried flowers and grasses are aold in Eugland for interior decora tion, just as they are in Amenaa. Hie flowers are dried in warm sand. A Florida woman recently chopped off the head of a great eagle that had become entangled in a honeysuckle vine while trying to kill her chickens. At an English wedding, which took place not long ago, the bridesmaids wore three bands of silver braid around their heads, with s lily at the aide. A key was all the preeent thsl s New York bride received from the bride groom's parents, bat it opened the door of a splendid hooae, and the young lady did not complain. Opera scarfs three yards long and more than half a yard wide are now popular in Paris for winding around the hair and throat. The newest opera cloaks, enveloping the whole person, are of thick, soft camel's hair, with a hood. The following extract is from an ac count of the recent visit of the Marquis of Lome and the Princess Louise to Niagara Falls: Tbe ladies all appeared at dinner in full dreea. Her royal high | ness wore a black silk drees, with court traiu, the only trimming being crape. Upon her neck was s necklace of Whitby jet beads, three strands, and diamond cut. Her hair was arranged in plain bands, with jet ornaments, and she looked lovely. The other ladiea were also in court coatnmes, and the gentle men were in full dreea. , Two Parmer#' Terrible Death. At Donaldsville, Ohio, on the national road, two farmers, Frank Leffet and a companion, who were returning home from a business visit to Bpringfleld, met with a most distressing accident They drove two spirited lioraea. As they ap proached Donaldsville the horses be came frightened and -suddenly started forward at a mad run. Mr. Leffet found it impossible to regain control of the animals, though incessantly striving to do ao. In the streets of Donaldsville the spring wagon to which tho horses were attached collided with another wagon, and one wheel of Mr. J-ieffet's wagon was twisted off ; yet he and bis companion clung to the wreck. As the team attempted to turn a corner they collided with a heavy wagon, throwing off its bed. Then the horses dashed madly forward and ran against a lamp post, knooking down one horse, bruising and injuring him so badly that he had afterward to be killed. Mr. Leffet was thrown against the lampjiost with snch foroe that his breast was crushed and mutilated horribly and his bowels torn opeu. His oompanion was thrown from the bed of the wagon to which he was frantically clinging against the brick front of a building on the corner, a distance of more than twelve feet. Such was the foroe with which the man was thrown and the position in which he struck the building that his skull was broken into three divisions. His shoulders and back were terribly torn and mangled. He was killed instantly. Mr. Leffet did not realize the extent of his injuries, and such was the intensity of his excitement that he helped to cut the harness from the dead horse and began to give direc tions about the wagon, when he fell, faint from loss of blood. Qalet Live*, to a vailey, omJww NTO - a uuift tore •. r~° ••*- Tabling ftsllftrt* and flbftw Under. Wsvtac *b*n the wtnda *Rt down ftO low. H*hM toil, and mom and gross grow round It, Playful rootwarns darted to and foend it: Drop* of vea werw first worn by oor band cestora in the tenth century. What to the sine of the needle that earned the threads of discourse ? Brown thinks thst all-absorbing tales should be printed on blotting paper. The onion originated in Europe. So important facto Teak oat one by one. The eldest son of the Prince of Wales, Prinoe Albert Victor, is fifteen years old. A number of horses have been poison ed in Kansas by being fed raw castor beans. If s word spoken in time is worth one puce of money, lilenee in its time to worth two. When does the rain beootne too famil tor with a lady ? When it begins to pat ter on her back. Toads and frogs were originally intro duced into the Sandwich islands Jto ex terminate cockroaches. ** I walked the floor all night with the toothache," said he; to which his ail feeling listener replied: " T<>n didn't expect to walk the oeiling with it, did yooP* Examination of 8,000 grammar school pupils at Boston shows that aooat five per cent of the boy* are oolor-bhnd, and only about ooe-lialf of one per cent, of the girls. Giles asserts that the lews are very •injust. A man can poach an egg and thera to nothing done about it, but let 1 him try to poach a chicken. Well, just j let him try that to all I In Egrpt mummies feed the fires that propel the iron home on the railroads. These dried-np human bodies, are said to make a very hot fire. Their supply to almost inexhaustible. A notice in a Western newspaper of a steamboat explosion ends as follow*: *' The captain swam ashore, fic did the chambermaid; she waa insured for 815,- 000 and loaded with iron." " There to nothing impossible,' ex claimed a man who was discoursing on Edison's achievement* That man, to find oat how egregiomdv be to mistaken, baa only to attempt to eat his own hair. A great many years ago a poor beg gar explained his ragged appearance by observing: "I have no money to *~y new clothing, and mend I can't. And his class have been called ever since. Hie Chinese have a very effective,if somewhat primitive, way of preventing the directors of a savings back running the institution they control into insol vency. They reckon the president'a head among the assets. The Cornish folk in England are noted as wonderful pie makers. They even serve vegetables In this manner and the laboring classes, in these hard times, are said to exist largely upon a curious compound known aa " turnip turnover." •• Will yv lew BIS thus forever ?"* And lbs looked Into his eyt* With a glanes thai —rani a token Of the fervor of tier agbe. •• I sodn't guaranty it" With a smile responded Pat. " For I n hardly n the notion That Til laaht as long a* that A dime, a nickel and a penny were found in the crop of a Montpeliev (Vl) rooster. The cat of a resident of Eaat Berlin, Me., swallowed a $5 gold piece; and the village batcher offered 82.50 tor her. While Mr. J a*. Rnby, of Bar tonia, Indwan feeding his hogs, he dropped his pocketbook among them, and ere wan he aware of bis loss they had contracted this currency 8&M. Burdette, in a letter to the Hawkryf, marnanimonslv allows the palm to the Bast in the matter of Revolutionary re lics, bat in the next breath is inclined to take it back. He says: I remember in 1876. when we had the great centen nial tea party at Burlington, that I aaw more Revolutionary relics at Cmon hall than I have seen in all New England. And they were better lo >kiug relics, too. Those I aaw in Old South church were verv old and battered and faded, and altogether shabby looking s while the lowa relioa had a bright.' fresh, modem look to them, that waa much pleaaanter to oontemplate." Pleurisy. This to an inflammation of the mem brane (pleats) which lines the chest and covers the lungs, and which se cretes a lubricating finiTthat prevents all harm from the movements of the cheat and longs against each other. The inflammation does not generally cover a large aarface. It may lie either acute or chronic. The former is charac tented by a sharp and piercing pain which is aggravated by a full breath coughing, or lying on the affected aide The patient to inclined to hold in ni breath all he can, but unfortunately the ailment to attended with a dr cough. The inflamed surface throws out much water, which presses on the loDga, and thus renders breathing diffi cult, or, if it ia on the left aide, may . crowd the heart over to the right Pleurisy is generally caused by a cold, or by getting wet, though some people are much more likely to suffer from it 1 than others, especially persona having acme other ailment. It begins with shivering, followed by fever. The following directions may be of aervioe if a phyaiciau cannot be secured: Apply to the affected part a large linaeed 1 poultice, quite warm, repeating it every three or four hours, or apply either j hops, tansy or wormwood, hot, aa a fo i menk Secure a copious sweat by anch ordinary means a* every housekeeper ia acquainted with. The fever should, if possible, be allayed, and sleep promot ed, but the medicines used to secure these results are not generally found in the house. The diet should be very | light. If the patient recovers—and he may, very rapidly—the water will be gradually absorbed. In chronic pleurisy the symptoms are less marked and mneh less painful, but the danger from it is really greater. In either case, call in a physician if possible. Persona abont to marry who wish to know the proper age are referred to the following precedents: Adam and Eve, 0; Hhakspearo, 18; Ben Johnson, 21; Walker, 22; Franklin, 21; Mozart, 25; Kenier, Fuller, Johnson, Burke. Scott, 26; Tycho, Brahe, Byron, Washington, Wellington, Bonaparte, 27; Penn, Sterne, 28; Linnena, Nelson, 28; Bnms, 30; Chancer, Hogarth, Peel. t32; Wadawortb, Davy, 33; Aristotle, 36; Sir William Jones, 37; Wilberforee. 38; Lnther, 42; Addison, 44; Wesley, Yonng, 46; Swift, 49; Bnffon, 55; Old Parr (last time), 120. If Adam and Eve got married be fore they were a year old, and the vete ran Parr buckled with a widow at 120, bachelors and spinsters may wed at any age they like and Hud shelter under great names for either early marriages or late.