-Al"vor,tiwinir Kates.
The tre snd relta'd- r-tretalatton i th. Our
ubi a Kbkem n pom mends It to !b liTonoli sots--ilderstli.ii
of advertisers. ---..se hivon? will be, 1
serted a tbe loliooiny l-.r rutw :
1 Ineb, 3 times ....$
1 months , ju,
1 mom ins 'j,,
1 " 1 yew t an
1 mnrit hs , o
t " 1 year lo.on
Ji " 6 months ,,nn
8 1 year 1, w,
"si eol'n t moot Vis lo.nn
V? " e XBonths 20.or
4 1 year ...... .
" J mntitbl av or,
1 year 1i.cn
Unstress Items, f "st tupcr"! r. l"e. per ltn, ; each
stihseqoent insertion rr line.
Administrator mnd tiecutor's Notl -CB..... . K
Auditor's Notice, I
S;rT and similar Notices l.K
lxs" Rrtohtfum or prm redtnQ of rsv corpOi i, 4o
fr trwnrtv J cnrnTfiiinicntwr. Amrne4 to ctl m'l n
turn r j vtat'fT at (imil.J nr ; triJia i t f ere
.Ion I'kiktiss of kll kituls neatly una eriKXllt
onilj eerutd at lowest prtrei. IKjd'i yon forget
It.
ls 'U:.in. !, Weekly t
f;lfhi n. ci3iHRi.i covirrr.
l II Ml" U. HASSO.
y$ frM
,.win'"'
s; ..;(' N l 1 his.
, .. , w . r ' -" .n ;i i' m.-e 1.M I
'", ! r I .1 "I wlihin 3 tri'irthj.. 1.75 i
ST
,j it imtlpuid W'thln 9 months, 'i.oo
1 if not i ai l within tbe year.. a
i-i ri-i b'iif nntslde of the county
,' ! t.nn.ii i'i"r e;ir Will t'C chanced to
''.( event w iil ttifi nlove terms bo de
ur! ihme tinn consult tnelr
: nv r'.: In i-ivauce tnut not ex
' .. ,". ..t. if'' - !! In sr as those who
t.i.-t I'C distinctly understood trom
ur
JAS.C. HASSON, Editor and Publisher.
'El IS A. FBBKMAN WHOM TBI TRUTH MAKES FRKK, AND ALL ABB 8LATK8 BBSIDB.
SI.SO and postage per year. In advance.
.ir 1
.'ire von ston it. if stop
:i:iw do otherwise.
'. ny.t snort.
VOLUMK XXI.
EBENSBURG, PA., FRIDAY, ArRIL 15, IS87.
NUMBER 13.
j ' I I V I
, fl xn -a O
H IV to .2 s W
Send for 73-Page
ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE
T T;IS PAPER.
r x r,,ooo tiore hook
iGhTi IO LLOlH NEW HOOK.
BpfpsS?S5.Service
A :: v Book .Ir-T FTi.inF.n hy nn ofElciaJ of
c - " y-?-i:' fij-i r: m-e in th" S.-crt-t rvice, in
. :. '' ::..iiont Kiv;il i ctuvo "olnuit tif over riO
7'.. i .. i (. .. ';intly l.lua-atcd by the best artists in
- ' J
2111) SI'PCRR rVCRAVINGS.
A ::iriuini; r-ror.i ?t-Ti-. turn ia the U. S. Post
f l j.t:t::i r r; r?vr t' inir ",k'' hi 9 of ITV-Ar-r
- '.'v ft' P.: rl:i:- 1 !!!..:' irs in th p.-tcc-I
. p irruit. M l a;.t.;n: of Ho'b.T9 of Ui 1". S.
i -; t'L'- thrr wi'h ,n compler 'ltrit-ription of the
t. yv aiM an.l cornplii a:.-il contrivancca of the
a'. 1 !i.sor:ipn:oas to defraud the public; also
l' fi r tf nrCOUUt Of tl!f
Fl.MOtS STAB HOITE FRAI DS,
.: -'..oil tfi' .l!'.; ..r h:t l out rj ctirtrM of the pre
f 1-.".. u of tLe e ..'..-n-' . for the covernnv nt.
AGENTS VANTED.ja
I'i- . y town th' r1 nre PostmrtRtrs, lerhantp,
V tarnn-r-. iTt-f uiinl Men. an! litu;-
1' .s it no niiV b-t,vi'i to ytt thi thrillinq
l !: - uuw liivit. fin nnjiuraiicd saic; itstlitat
r Lt t" M-ji tti. i W'om.ii A-nt makirnr from
$ ' a Rif.'iil :i 1 y. V waiit an ayctit in
t ; in theC. S. nnd .inarii rWc
j; . v.'.i.- . t ;iJit As y i'tK-o?f wjth tu. i phe
i. .; . - .1 : rir "fook.'-an bsuiuj Aic-4.ful Ageut,
.''; '- i 'ttiVi . A'-'nt art ni'Ttmi;
'u v ; f l etty'ss. Z ' "-'t Jart no himi-
T; -i, f. i. 4$j--iil 7'cTtnjs to uy FrHjUts.
l-.- i.-;,!.. -(we civ you the exci'i:ve oi this
t- i 1:1 r -rrivirv fi-vUfiif! you. Wr:t fur oar large
1. r.---i:- .1 :rriMM. cor.tiiininir full pnrticulHrs.
i- rTrj to A'nt.-1. etc., t-nt frte to all. Ad
: - r.i :.e i iv trie Vi .i-h rs,
V LM Lit Jt ( S P R I M; FIELD, 31 ASS.
Fvtim'.j of Il.irtf.rd, Cona.
Stun
a t f tl r.rris or
nt .;n:s, sri:iN; ava(;xs,
7 -xr.'.z.i V:ll;-o Thxtzzz,
a: .. : a:;d thf.es Eira PiLtrroKa.
P'JLhGLLtlVO BUCK BOARD. No. 21.
''iM(iN';. !;iiHY-l.'"i a : t
: i s' i tthli lor eitti. r c '.X . .
. i.. ft'id Piiporior to all j'jir :
w?n:r. Picaswre o" l-tiiitic-M v. ' --j'.r.,tn.'a.
.cud.f. r iit;i.u;au u.. I
!.i:d "Wa 'on Co., Ctocin -ali, 0.
!'
' 'i is t-otr'p' :',. d vholly of nd-
't'lp ii-.f- .no-:ts. f.wa one
: twj ! by '.!" ne !i-
i t-t ti:" in -t po;.-rit f 'ail
u - i.'-J k 'o-.Tri f riil:cal
' .". rt ..h'i . i , i . ; rvor' ra-j o
'"ii'r.il ;itit crvu KeliilitfJ
,Mr;il'in. 'i rot: if ItliMim.l-j
"ia. I.ivpr '4mplnint anl j
J'i'arsof the Stomach.
it I r-i.-zlst Is nut of ourpunph-
t -j f.f I.if..-." or if '! nre
? u ! ' r a 1 n t tnenti-m 1
; i t .-$ a Ivj-rtiSia-.'fct". aMrt -v
', ' : :, a. ii. ilnriiua.1 it ''., ( o-
'.-;.. (Aw. -i.;
posiflvoiy
cu-i-j C !:!-
. i i I '; irrn i' i ("o 1 ! all
11
ii 11 r p. r bottit-; ) x lot
ii.i KcirfliMi uti'l 'ftnmu.
Mean Detective BnrtiaD,
"ain
f -I
,
.'
I ;
A
out
. l mill !H ItlMlllWUrf At-,
i'iii!.ttirri. fa.
' l"'- t 1 nvid H. liiftin;on,
' ' ""liii rnDi7d ami conducts
I-t.ii; l t. e I tiirl States STM
i r i i nt j ifcr.t s in all the I'rincl
' It I r in ii sim It s and ( 'a f oa.
I ' T, . I I , L. . 1 Ii 1 1. r, J I ifcll buj.t
' I .. ii en Ltt ndi tit.
' ' "tli, Ation :i j for the Uurrau.
la ii - J. p.ro- . hit I Scret ser-
:-:k---.3 !.. ."end . 'Ir-
aril Wagon Co,
ivAfi
K (K ROYAL
Absolutely Pure.
I ne powder never varies. A marvel 01 pu r It
strength and wholesotneness. More econom leaJ
!h:in the ordinary kinds, and cannot oe sold In
competition with the multitude of the low test,
short weiitht, alum or phosphate powders. Sold
yly in cant. Kuril Bini.tn Povvdsr Uo.,106
Wall St.. Mbw York-
U SSIAN
HEUMATISMSK
URE
dont care Anrthmff btrt Rheumatism, bnt it cnnl
that every time. It cured
SM'I.. Brnss. Lancaster, Pa.
Mr. Habtmn. Sr., Bloomsbuni. P.
Mrs. Rev. R. H Robisbon. Stannton. Va.
Mm. Wm. Meharo. KiO Wjlie St., Philadelphia.
.1 F. Ni wtns. Camden. K. J
Mns Mart CArnoK, M xnwtmni, N. J.
IravZ MakU, MiiiK h I hunk. Pa
(IrF.RT BOX A
BIB ROTH . - v .
e. USS1AH
TRADE 51 4 RKSVi
9HEUMTISH Cu.
- SIGNATTRE
PRICE
$2.50
Pf BOX.
Tt r.m: if'e iuf i.Tinit'nn, lecriptiTe 1'ani.
plilit. with t''tiiiioiiini.. Ir'e.
Tor .sale by nil ilrumiiM. If one or the other i
D"t in -'SiLion to filriuh it to you, do not le ht
ennd.! to tiiae ajutliin elo. but aiyly direct to the.
(i.neral Am-tit. W A hi. .Fit BIKS. dt I O.
blU V Si I Jilaxket ""'n l. Fliiludelphiu.
THE CHAUTAUQUA
d Planter,
ONE-HAND
I J AUTOMATIC MACHINE.
WV p-f A,,ril ,8S2,
V'-. af- j Feb. 21, 1SS5.
All of Metal, Lisrht. Strong-,
Well Conatrttcted and
Elegantly Painted.
Plants Corn 'and pumpkin,
seeds', Beans, etc.
1VOKKS WELL IN SOl-I'Y, LUMPY
AND bf-jNY GKOl ND.
I! ''ilv n-' oniiiionded by Farmer
inn 1 Healers in all sections.
1 lie fine .Kaved in one (lay's
use w ill pay for it.
PRICE, - - S2.7S.
l.iln-ral discount to agent
iiml the Undo.
I :inv.-i-s,.rs e.isilx tniike $10.00 per
day hi tbe plantiug season.
Pond for circular.
and extra induce
ments to a fronts and
c.nnva-serK.
Mention this pa
per, and address,
Th2 ChautauquapianterCompaniJ
JAJILSTOWN, IS. Y
B. J7 LYNCH,
IJ NDERTAKKR,
And Manufacturpr jfc Dealer in
HOME AND CITY WADE 5
FURNITURE!
rmsE ass win suits,
LOUNGES, BEDSTEADS,
jSXattresaee, &c,
ELEVKNTII AVENUE,
ALTOOXA, PENN'A.
r-,"."(Jitiens rf Cumhria t'ounty and all I
nthpro wisihitiK to purtBsp lionest FURXI
TT'KK. Arc. at honpst price? are respectfully
Itivlted to give ns a call before olivine else
where, as we are cocfident tfat we can
meet every want and please ever- taste.
Prices the very lowest. 4 16 '80-tf.l
PATENTS
Obtained and all PATENT PT'SlESS at
tf ruled to for MODKHATK FEES.
Our f.fticp is orposite the V . Patent
Ofticp and we can obtain patent in less time
tban those remote from WASHINGTON.
Send MODEL OU DRAWJNU. We ad
vise as to patentahllitv free of ebarsre and we
naV- NO CHARGE UNLESS PATENT IS
SEGUED.
V refere, here, to the Postmaster, the
Sutt. of Money Order Div , and tc tbe fjfli
cials of the I' S. l'atent Oflice. For circu
lars, advice, terms and references to actual
Clients in jour own Mate write to
Opp. ralenl Olliee Washington, I. C.
I'NEUUALI.KD IS
Tone, Toncfi-Wortmansliiii & DaraMIily.
' 'vTII.I.TAW KnilK A. Cr
N. s. island Wet naltimoro Stre jtluiore.
'.;. li-li'.f h Avguus, New York.
1 .;. .!.ULbirif, ui'li fak:.;aii'i:'
, , . I , ;! r-ii-" t-ivvii a
t ; , . "- M-l.ti'.Mi. -ItowiltL D
i i.,' IlM-'tttl.! M J'i'i-. !,.!. -
;,, , v ' n...v v.-ik
f,M ,( i,, in- a 1 1
1 I I IM 1 1 II,
"0
( tuwr uu ooi n rune yiBrBB
ipf -0s rrL jc- ka.
Oorn&Soo
- tk r.
I1
8.;
i
t-U3-'
--.
:r-.-.-
ORAW-POKER
JOSH COBB AND HIS DOGS.
An Eccentric Coon-Hunter', Ufe and
Sudden lH-tli.
" Thoro never was a greater coon
huntfr than old Josh Cobh. who he
loiiped everywhere in tliia part of tho
State, and yet nowhor In particular,"
said an old-tiruer, who renieinl-cretl his
subject well.
" As for that, there never waa a bet
ter huntor of anything in tho Phape of
wild game than Josh was. Ilis long
Pini;li-l.arri'llei rille, hU tall, gaunt
fiKuro, uiid tlie sliaip-eyed yellow dogs
that always trailoil at his hools were
oi.jeets familiar in every town, village,
and camp from the Lohigh to the Chc
mungandthe Delaware to tha Smsque
hanna 30 or 40 years ago.
" There was a mystery about his yel
low dogs that no ono could ever solve.
Tooplo In those days, who had known
Joyh for 40 years and more., never eaw
him without the yellow dogs following
close in his tracks, yet they knew that
the dogs could not bo tho same ones
yetir in and year out.
" No one elso was known to have a
dog of the name breed as Josh's. It
was long-limbed and long-haired with an
eye as wild ami hharp as a wolf's. Josh's
dogs never made friends with anvoue
besides himself. When he stopped they
stopped, and never moved on until he
did.
" During the CO ycara that Josh
traveled about In tho woods these
yellow dogs wero his constant com
panions. " Naturally In all these years the
hunter must have had at least six
different generations of dogs, and they
must all have been bred and raised
Somewhere by himself.
" The secret died with the old hunter,
for Bit ice his death, a quarter of a cen
tury and more aifo, no such dogs as his
mysterious, wolf-like yellow ones have
ever been seen In this region.
" They were equally useful on tho
deer trail, in the fox chase, after bear,
on the rabbit track, In the pheasant
hunt, or afterthe wily coon. They would
never hunt with a party unless Josh
was in charge of it. Josh never had
less than three of these strange, un
friendly animals at his heols. Fre
quently lie had ,ix or seven.
" Sound inies he would not bo seen In
any of the villages for months at a time,
and his nppoar.inee in town after these
long stays in the woods was always
Signalized by his going on an extended
Spree. He hail but few words to say to
anyone, even when drunk, but he "was
determined iu his purpose, and whatever
lie made up his mind to do, drunk or
pobpr, no one could prevent hini from
dointr.
AViien ho was in liquor his dogs
watched nliout him constantly. I
" ( tiii-o he came into the old Egypt
clearing and got drunk. He had five
dogs with him. A big bushwhacker
rami"! Elijah Hoar was there, also
drui. k. Hoar w;.s the terror of every
plac win re he happened to be when
drunk. H e was quarrelsome, tyrannical
and brutal.
" On this occasion he tried to stir up
a quarrel with unoffending Joh Cobb,
and finally struck him. Instantly all
five of the dogs were upon the bully.
He fought his way out of the barroom,
ami, ns ho went, out of the door, shot
and killed one of the dogs, Josh's fav
orite, liatni'd ' tlrad."
" Josli got sober next day. no had
the il.-nd dog buried, but never said a
word i r made any sign indicating that
ho had any feeling in the matter. He
shouldered Ms rifle and went back to the
woods with h's remaining dogs.
"The. day that Josh left the clearing
Elijah Hoar hud gone l a. k to his bark
Job, over nuar Nebo Swamp. lie didn t
omno in to the cabin that night, anil
next morning one of the men on the job
went out to seo what tht reason was.
lie found Hoar lying on his face by the
6tump of a big hemlock tree, ne was
dead, with rillo ball through his
heart.
There waa never any enldonco dis
covered that warranted the urnst of
fir.y ono on the charge Of having killed
tlie bark-peeler, but no one ever had any
doubt as to who It was. Josh Cobb
had avenged tho death of his dog, as
euro ns the dog was dead.
"Old Josh's last hunt was in the
month of February, lS.'fi. That was a
favorite coon-hunting month of his,
pr rather eoon-killing .nonth, for as
tie knew where hp could go any time
and get the game ho wanted, there
wasn't much hunting about it.
About that time of year the coons
oJTi still huddling t gether in their Win
tor nests in hollow trees. Thirty years
ago coon skins hud a good market value,
and old Josh always made a raid to
ward 1heMid of Winter.
"Taking his dogs one day he went
over to Nebo Swamp, and in a short
time located eight trees, each one of
wliK-'h, his woodcraft assured him, con
tained a family of coons snoozmg away
In tho hollow trunk. He cut down one
tree after another, nnd his dugs soon
routed out the coons and made short
work of them.
Josh had felled 6ovcn of tho trees,
and 42 coons wcro lying alxuit on the
snow, ready to bo gathere 1 up and
Skinned.
He sot to work on the eighth tree,
which was what was known as a ' pep
perage " tree. It was dead and hollow.
One big limb stuck out from the trunk
40 feet fn'in the ground.
"Josh worked away with his axo at
the trunk, and had the tree nearly ready
to fall, when the big limb suddenly
eepnrate 1 from the trunk and fell with
a crash. Josh could not get away in
time, and the heavy brand: struck him
OO the) head and ho dropped to the
ground with a crushi! skull.
Tho singular howling of Josh'3 dogs
attracted tho attention of a mule
driver who w-as returning from tho
ttfekwood'i by tho road on the outer
edge of th swamp. He followed the
Aoiind to tho tree, and found Josh
lying senseless.
He carried him to tho wagon,
followed by tho whinlnff dogs, and took
the wounded huntor io the clearing.
Josh never oamo to, and dlel during the
night.
A no ono knew of any relatives
of hiii ho was buried at tho clearing.
His dogs lingered about the spot for
several ilays, and their howling was ao
dii res-jug; that it was resolved to shoot
the poor creatures, but they dX-appeared
beior.; tho r -solution ks carried Into
effect. Whatever, lecaina of thcra CO
one ever knew."
The Right Time To Water IIor,e.
rrofessor I'ritchanl, in a recent lec
ture, pointed out that one capital reason
why hores suffer so much from
indigestion In cold weather Is tho
common practice of allowing them to
drink after feeding heartily.
If the precaution were taken of al
lowing them to have their fill of
water before having their feed of corn
and other provender, they would suffer
far les- in his opinion. If, in addition,
the pruci ice of always giving chilled or
lukewarm instead of cold waterto horses,
wer" always adopted, they might be al
lowed to "drink freely as stnui as they
come in from the lield, although, la a
profuse State of perspiration.
Wealth of Some Millionaire. j
I had an argument with a well-known
broker tho other day over the amount of
capital represented by the big operators
in Nall street. Wo ettimatel nearly
$tio0,6ou,uuu among men of over a uUUob
tspiUl I Town Topics. . t
REVELATIONS BY A BARTENDER.
The Tricks of the Liquor Bnsiiiets.
"I will give you a practical insight
Into the mysteries of our profes-ion,"
the bartender said to the reporter. "In
the first place, before we gut our liquors
they are salted."
" Salted V " queried the scribe.
"Veil, brought down to a certain de
gree by waters and powders, so that
they have a delicate and palatable flavor.
This system makes the price consider
ably less to us. Then, when we get our
whiskeys and brandies they undergo an
other process."
"So?"
"Yes, wo red u co them still further.
For instance, we buy a barrel of whi6key
which holds forty gallons. From that
we get half as much again. We take
say a gallon of whiskey and to that we
add a quart of water and a quart of
spirits which we buy at $1.25 a gallon."
'But that would change ihe color and
destroy the flavor."
The bartender smiied grimly as he
said : "Oh ! no, we have remedies for
that. We use chemicals which give a
natural color and consistency, and then
we have powders which impart a flavor.
In fact the system is so penec; that men
w!.o profess to be judges of the real ar
ticle pronounce our liquors perfect."
"But haven't you a No. 1 article for
sale?" qui ied the reporter.
"No ; what we sell for No. 1 Is the su
perior article blended with iL-ferior stuff.
For that we charge lifteen cents a ponv.
The cost to us is about $:i VJo a gallon."
"Well, .s there not a .superior quality
of rum ? Surely that is genuine. Yon
cannot counterfeit the flavor."
"l?:ess your heart, that is a simple
thing. We just tako the ordinary cheap
rum, mix a pint of molass s to every
gallon, and then add a few drops of a cer
tain chemical we use and we have the
widely celebrated rum. This pure Scotch
which we havesooften praised is nothing
but the . ommonest gin. We .-imply pulu
liltb: Scotch chemical flavor into a bottle
of the article, and wo have the real old
Highland whiskey warranted pure."
"But your wines ; you cannot adulter
ate those'?"
"Not all of them. There are some
which we buy so cheap that it is not
worth while to tamper wiih them. Clar
et for instance. French claret we can
buy at twenty-eight ceutsa bottle whole
sale and a cheaper grade coots us twenty
live cents.
"We can adulterate port wine which
Is adulterated when we buy it. We mix
a quart of spirits wiih each gallon, which
many think improves its flavor. Then
to bring it back to its original color
we mix poders with it and we have
genuine first class wine.
" Sherry wii.es I believe are also adul
terize 1 with vinegar, suar and syrup,
but of that I knww nothing personally.
"I will ive you a practical illustration
of some ol our methods. Here is a four
and ;t half gallon keg, into which I
am going to put three gallo s of .-alted
whiskey, three quarts of cheap spirits
and three quarts ol water, and when I
havu finished you will have before you
some line oid Hotirbo.. whiskey."
The bartender at this point drew throe
gallons of liquor from a barrel and then
put it into a smaller cask. Then he took
nearly a. gal Ion of spir.ts and threw quarts
of water, and alter mixing the two,
poured them into tho keg. Then ho
drew therefrom a glassful of the mixture.
It did not have either the color or tho
flavor of the geuuino article, and the
Scribe looked puzzled.
"Possess your soul in patieuce.my dear
boy, and you will soo tho whole system,"
said he professor. ' Now you observe
th;s small dott If with th ; dark substance ;
tha: costs us $i an ounce. It is both tho
flavor and the e. lor that we put in. I
taUe, see, about two t.V le-poonfuls a .d
put it into tlni cask. Now I mix. it up,"
suiting the a tiou to the word.
Then tho bartender dre v a wino-'l iss
fui of the artieie from the koij and the
re;orte.' was astoni he i. No diffeivne .
conld b" s ii between the original whis
key and th .t which had been maniilac
ture 1.
"This we bottle and sell over the bar
at ten cent s a drink," said t h bar: ender.
"And your lem, er.ince drinks are or-o
still," he con in tied. " Sel jer, or in
ta ce, is ma e of w.. tor ami mar-do dust
C are 1 Willi acids. One or two glasses
will never inirt nybody, but if yw.i tako
it legul r.y it is b und to fetch you."
"Well, in't th re any puro tempe; a ,ci
drink ?"
W dl there Is cl ler. buieventhat, in
a majority ofcasi. ismixedwi.li impure
spiiiis wii- wee ill it, to prev. nt L.r m
. ui'iiuig miiii- ' N. Y. M.i 1 au i I.x,'io-s.
A Olrl, a Boy, and a Cow.
About two years before the war, near
a pretty and substantial residence, a
beautiful young girl, about 14, was
sleeping in a. hammock swung from
two stately oaks in a grove.
In a meadow to the rear, a fat, meek
eyil cow reclined in the shade. Across
tin- road from the house, the girl, and
cow. was a meadow, a pathway running
through it. and coming up the path way
was a boy with a gun.
When "within lnO yards of the girl,
nnd about Llo yards from the cow, a bird
Hew up. sailed in the air toward the
cow, and the boy fired at the bird, which
flew on unhurt, but the cow received a
pretty strong dose of shot.
She immediately arose In fright,
dashed through the grove, caught the
girl and hummock on her horns, and
nishe.1 with her shrieking victim about
the lot. The terrified girl became
silent, anil the crowd of relatives and
friends In pursuit thought that she was
dead.
The wild fury of the cow ns she rushed
around soon tore the netting loose, and
the girl dropped unconsciously to the
ground, unhurt. She was picked up nnd
taken in the house, and on examination
only a few minor bruises were found.
The boy, thinking he was the innocent
cause of tho killing of the young girl,
disappeared. All trace of him vanished.
It was thought that he had perished
by his own hand, but about six years
after the war a travel-stained stranger
was in the town inquiring for persons
most of whom had been swept away by
the war.
After a long search the stranger
learned where one of the parties he was
in search of lived, a few miles out of
town. He went there, made himself
known, and turned out to be tho boy of
the gun.
The people he found were father and
mother, who had mourned him dead for
eight years.
The lioy had been in South America,
got rich, and, yearning for the love of
the old folks, returned to tho desolated
home of Ms childhood and made his
loved ones comfortable.
For the first time thea hearing that
the girl was uninjured, he called on her,
found her pretty, good, and a first-class
homo woman. He put In with a will,
got her heart as his own, and the old
folks' consent, and has been for the last
twelve or fourteen years one of the
leading business men of this section.
Americus Republican.
rnnrvne ff Troe.
A correspondent of the Pall Mall re
marks that all words beginning with si
have In some degree a second rate or
bad quality about tiinm.
"Look through the dictionary," ho
says, "and you will not find one that Is
quite first-rate, for 'sleep,' which Is
about the best of them, is after all half
way to death, and the great majority of
these words arc more or less disgusting
&3 VitiJ dtfc-:udeJ." ..-r
swindling: her landlady
As Ex-ltoardinc-Moiise Keeper Tells S
tiood Story.
" I have at last managed to get out of
the boarding-house business, and I can
assure you that nothing on earth will
induce me to take it up again for a living
if I can help it," said Mrs. Terry to the
writer.
" It Isn't living It's slmpily a try ing
existence, and that's all," sho con-tiuui-d.
Every time you pick up a paper, al
most, you come across soma horrid
joke on the poor boarding-house Keeper
nbout tough beef end ancient turkeys ;
but how rarely a word about the 'tough '
lioarders ! hoarders who find fault with
everything, their room, the service, and
particularly the fviod.
" Let me tell you a little story illus
trating what landladies have to put up
with.
" A nice boarder that I had was such a
dear little widow. Young, handsome,
nd 'so charming ' the young men and
old ones, too. for that matter at once
pronounced her.
" She brought her child, a little girl of
f, years, and a maid with her, Hnd took
my best room for herself and a very
rood one for the maid, tihe also had a
little sky terrier.
" Her references couldn't have been
better, and besides she had friends
living in tho neighborhood who moved
in the -best society.'
" Of course she was the most admired
lady in the house; all the men, young
and old, married and single, were crazy
after her. and, singular as if. may seem,
the women were too. She paid her
board promptly for three or four weeks
and had numerous extras. She seemed
to have all the money she wanted nnd
more too.
" One day she came to me and said it
was a good deal of trouble for her
to pay each week. As sho only drew
her money once a month she hated, she
said, to keep so much on hand, therefore,
would it be just as convenient for me to
take it once a month?
" Certainly I had no objections. As
it legan to be near the time for her
bill to be duel noticed that sho acted
very depressed and was found crying
once or twice.
"Everybody was deeply sympathetic,
but all that could be gotten from herwas
that she was worried but thought every
thing would be soon all right. We
'mustn't trouble ourselvet nlwmt her,
she wasn't worth it,' was her reply to
inquiries.
" Finally, one day sho sent for me to
come to her room. She was crying ap
parently very bitterly. Between her sobs
she managed to tell me that the bank
in which she had kept her money had
failed and she had lost every dollar.
What was she to do?
I told her to take things easy and
perhaps something would turn up. Yes,
she thought her friends would help
her. Of course I told her that she was
perfectly welcome to renin in where she
was a few days or a week, until she
had made some arrangements.
" I thought at least sho might have
offered to change her rooms for smaller
ones, so as to give me a cliai-ce to
let, them. P.ut she did not, and not
only that but she found fault with the
lable nnd really made herself very dis
agreeable, and then I was making her a
present of her board.
" She kept this up until I could not
stand it any longer, without giving any
sign of paying up or leaving. Then I
spoke to her about it and she resented
mv remarks. At this I told her she
must go nnd that I would feel obliged to
keep her luggage until alio settled her
bill.
" She sniib-d and said, 'very well,' and
left that night child, maid, dog and
all. Out she went straight to a rival
boarding-house near-by and took several
of mv best boarders, too.
" She told them that her 'remittance'
bad been only two days late, and that
I had not only refused to wait that short
time for her' money, bnt had insulted
her by calling her "a sharper and good
ness what all.
" Y'ou can Imagine what a storm such
a story created, and my men boarders
were especially furious at me.
' "And what" do you suppose I found
in that woman's trunks? Two or three
flat irons to make them heavy, I
suppose several old dresses nnd a lot
of newspapers. I suppose her maid
must have been systematically carry
ing away all her handsome dresses for
some time."
THE COTTAGE BY THE SEA.
Something About the Oisillusions of Life.
In my Imagination the cottage by the
sea is always occupied by a newly
wedded pair: a nmrvelonsly handsomo
man, chivalrous as a Scottish knight
and brave a.s a Nuniidian lion, and a
dainty little darling in pink and rufiles,
with a coil of sunny hair, and a nature
as shrinking as a violet. She regards
him as a model of perfection, and he
rests sorenuly under the impression
that sho is faultless.
In real life the husbnnd does not go
on forever assuring his companion that
he " could not livcwithout her," lavish
ing caresses, and calling her " sweet ; "
nor does the always exert herself par
ticularly to make home pleasant for her
lord and master.
Common humanity cannot exist on
rose leaves and kisses; consequently
he discovers ere long that supporting
a wife demands something more serious
than wearing a buttonhole liotiquet, and
scenting his kerchief with White Koso or
Jockey lub.
She learns that housekeeping is not as
romantic as she thought at first. That
it doesn't consist altogether of training
the ivy to climb at the east window, and
smiling sweetly at tea. There is work
real drudgery to be done.
Ere long the rent of the aforesaid cot
tage by the sea falls due, and it con
tinues to fall duo with startling regu
larity. That arouses him somewhat
from his dream of happiness.
Presently he is aware that there is
such a being in existence as a tax col
lector, and before long he recognizes
the fact that butchers must be attended
to, and that bakers are heartless enough
to expect money in return for their
wares; also that dressmakers do not
work for nothing, and that milliners
have rights that must be recognized.
With such reminders it is not wonder
ful that she who sang
" Leave me not darling,"
in a voice full of tremulous pleading, bids
fair to become an Inveterate scold, or
that he wonders distractedly. If rest is
found anywhere, except "under the
daisies." St. Louis Magazine.
On a Mexican Street Car.
Although the etiquette of a Mexican
street car is free and easy, and men
smoke inside or on the platform, women
nre invariably treated with respect, and
half a dozen men will get up to give
place to any woman, young or old, rich
or poor.
The Mexican gentleman lias all the
courtesy for which the Latin races arc
famous" and life is smoothed and its
angles rounded by the constant courtesy
of this most polite nation.
Do not imagine that because people
smoke in the street cars their interiors
resemble the American railway smoker
all filth under foot, and the air befouled
with rank cigars and old pipes.
Tho windows nre generally open, and a
constant current of air drives the enaoke
Out. IfcOclWi IkTiild.
HIS ONLY CHEW.
Bow a Boy Ws induced to Chew Tobacco
Bind what Came of It.
I never tried to chew tobacco but
once," remarked the Rev. Mr. Bedwall.
" I f-hall never forget the circumstance."
" Tell us about it," remarked a young
lady, who a few moments before
had been baptized by the reverend
gentleman.
" I was a very small boy at the time,
and a great favorite of Daniel, a colored
man owned by my father. I used to go
out to Dan's cabin at night and listen to
his ghost 6tories until I was afraid
to cross t a yard to the 'big
house,' as tne negroes termed our
residence.
"One night, when the wind scattered
the snow-llakes around the old cabin,
and while several largo sweet po
tatoes roasted in the fire, I eat with
Daniel.
" No one who has been raised among
colored people can forget the comfort of
sitting around the cabin lire. The old
spinning-wheel, the hamper basket in
the comer, the red bedsteads and the
dug-out cradle, all come back and defy
the influence of a glowing future and
soft rugs.
" Dan was strikingly communicative
on the night in question. We had killed
hogs that day, and the truth is, old Dan
had been drinking.
" ' Tom.' remarked the old man, yer
don't chew terbacker, does yer?'
" ' No, sir.'
" Dat's a pity. A boy who doesn't
chew terbacker never will ben man. I'll
bet yer can't spit oberdat back log. Trv
hit.'
" I tried and failed signally.
" ' Dar now. Domi yer know dat aboy
what can't spit will never be a man?
Haven't yer noticed how a man ken
spit.'
" Yes, sir.'
" 'Well.wouldn' yer like ter place yesef
on de record, an' lam to spit like a white
man?'
' Yes, sir.'
" 'Well, heah, tako dls,' and he cut a
piece of tobacco from a large twist,
" ' Smack dat in your mouf an' chaw
while de 'taters is roastin.'
" I obeyed, and in a few moments could
spit like a man.
" 'Cum down on hit savage," he said.
'Hit hard. Watch me,' and he chewed
vigorously. The fire grew excessively
warm. I looked around and the hamper
baskets seemed to be tumbling over each
other.
" ' Doan spit it out. Hit savage. Chaw
hard. De victory is in sight. Is yer
sick?'
" ' No, sir; but but '
"I had eaten a hearty supper, but
within three minutes from the time I
threw out the tobacco I was ns empty
as one of the hamper baskets, and
as limber as the spinning-wheel
band.
" Dan spread a blanket on the floor,
and, as I dozinl off to sleep, I heard
him blowing the ashes from the potatoes.
' I never have taken another chew."
Opie Read.
Anecdote of the Pope,
Although not connected with tho
American press. Pope Leo XIII is not
only a man of talent, but he is also very
witty.
Twenty years ago His Holiness was
Papal nuncio at Brussels. He was
invited to take dinner at the royal
table one day. He accepted the in
vitation. Among the guests was a certain
count, w ho. for some reason or other,
made it his business to poke fun at tho
Pupal nuncio.
He ws particularly merry over the
celibacy of the clergy" and finally took
out a snuff box and asked the nuncio to
look at it.
On the eover of the box was a
semi-nude picture of a celebrated
coquette.
" How does your Eminence like the
picture?" asked the scoffer.
The nuncio examined the picture care
fully, and remarked as he handed it
back :
" That is a very beautiful lady. Count.
It is a portrait of the Countess, I
suppose."
That was positively tho last time the
Count ever a-sked a clerical gentleman to
examine that snuff box.
tnnsr Fancies.
In Devonshire it is believed thnt on
seeing the first new moon of the year,
if you take off one stocking and run
across a field, you will find between two
of vour toes a hair which will be the
color of the hair of the lover you are to
have.
In Berkshire the proceeding is more
simple, for you merely look at the new
moon and say :
" New moon, new moon, I hall thee!
Rv all the virtue in thy body.
Grant this night that I may see
He who my love shall be."
The result is guaranteed to be satisfac
tory, as it is In Ireland, where the people
are said to point to the new moon with a
knife, and say :
" New moon, true morrow, be true now
to me,
That I, to-morrow, my true love may
see."
In Yorkshire, again, the practice was
to catch the reflection of the new moon
In a looking-glass, the number of re
flections signifying tho number of years
which will clapso before marriage.
All these superstitions are suggestive
of that which Tylor calls "one of the
most instructive astrological doctrines"
namely, that of the "sympathy of
prowlng"ond declining nature with the
waxinc: end waning moon."
Tylor says that a classical precept
was to set eggs under the he: nt new
moon, and that a Lithuanian precept
was to wean boys on a waxing and
girls on a waning moon to make the
liovs strong and the girls delicate.
On the same grounds, hesnys, Orkney
men object to mnrry except with a
growing moon, and Mr. Dyer says that
In Cornwall, when a child is born in the
Interval between an old and a new
moon, it 15 believed that he will never
live to manhood. All The Year Round.
Heaven I.lcs nbout t's in Onr Infancy."
What a beautiful aHd living delu -ion
it isl- the belief which all mother - or
f.ittn rs entertain that there is sometl ing
so very extraordinary a-out their own
baby as to dittiuguis.i it from every
I other uaiy.
Although, when I come to think ot it
more attentively, I am not so sure that
it is a delusion, after ail. It may be
that, instead of hav ing ho -dwinked and
blinded us to the imporfec ions of our
own children, our f ather, and their
Fattier, has but lent a new keenness to
our vision, has but brushed away the
cobwebs and dus-t that biinded us, so
that wo can see more truly and deeply
into the hidden beauty and mystery
which Ho lius cast uruuii i each of His
liitlo ones.
You know what Emeispii says, that
"infancy is the perpetual Mcssi Ii which
comes to the arms of fallen men, and
pleads with them to return to Paradise."
And there is a beaut. ful saying of old
Jean Paul, of which 1 often think: "The
smallest children," he says, "are near
est God, as tho smallest planets are
nearest the sun."
And if it be so, it is no wonder that
we should feel hushed and awed aud
thrilled, as we sometime do, la til 8
riV&vae of a Utile child.
ALKALI SINKS DESCRIBED.
Treacherous Spots on the Oreen frifclHe
In Winch Travelers Are Sometime, I.ost .
It is an nwf ,il siht to see a man ilrow-n,
but with foresight and skid no man nee I
to drown Fancy a sea in which there is
no swimming, and a sea into which you
may plunge unaware.
A man is 1-ping over the green prairie,
looking out from under his broad sum
breio nt the lazy cattle nn i the prairie
(lors playir-g in the sun. Suddenly ih.-re
i a sound like a giant's throat swallow
ing a choking shout of terror. The
prairie dogs run into their holes, and a
moment later come out cautiously and
frightened.
'ihe tall, reed-like grass is waving
where the horse and rider were just now.
The antelope on the crest of the divide
yonder look around them watchfully.
But there is nothing to fear no man iu
is going to town, that rider, with
the wages of a hard winter's work in his
pocket, riding his favorite broncho,
creased in the buckskins he had fringed
in ths winter evenings, ready to show the
foolish girls how brave he looked in bis
rude attire. Wnem is he now he and
his horse? In a grave of slimy, shiver
ing mud alkali paste blue witn a name
less tint of putri'i death, has filled hi
throat covered his eyes before he could
Close the lids.
What does this mean this hideous
freak of nature some work of a devil
endowed with a moments power? No;
only an alkali sink ; only a natural well
filled with paste as yielding as water
retentive as Hades.
Picture to yourself the surface setting
back to its normal quietude, with an in
describable gulp, a gnoul-like smacking
of grave-lips. A grave that supplies It
self with dead a grave that buries be
fore it kil s an insatiable, bottomless
grave, set like a trap for the living.
The sink-hole is not always covered
with grass. Sometimes it hus a caked
and seamed crust of Lluish white alkali
on the top of it. But even that is a poor
safeguard, for the long green gra-s
around it will hide it from the rider un
til it is too late to avoi l it.
The tenacity of this paste of mud is
something incredible. I have never seen
a man caught iu a sink-hole, but I have
seen a man ride to the edge of one, dis
cover it too late to turn las horse, and
shaking himself loose in thesa ldie vault
over the horn pommel, when the pony
was caugnt, striking the ground beyond
the siuk-liolo. There were twenty men
there, and before the horse had sunk far
there were half a dozen ropes fast to
him.
Half a dozen strong ponies can pull
almost anything, but they could not pull
that horse back from the grave that was
ciohmg over him. There is a strane
suction about this alkali it holds ad it
grasps with a horrible pertinacity. t;an
Francioco Ingleside.
PERSONAL BEAUTY.
Soin Valuable Hints for Irso Fmir Se.
" Do you know." said nn ol ' Pittsburgh
physician, "tbiit the two greatest de
stroyers of tin- eonipipyicri are air nnd
soap? Well, it is so. I inei.u that there
is too little fres.li air, properly breathed,
and too much soup.
" The respiration has much to do with
the dullness or brightness of tho com
plexion. You may notice any lady who
takes short, quick breath", nnd she will
le slightly stooped and have a whitish
leaden color about her face. Such wo
men soon go into consumption or con
tract some other bit g disease.
" The habit is generally contracted in
school from leaning over ti e desk, nnd
to my mind the danger from this is great
er than from curvature of the spine.
" Another thing is too free use of soap.
You never heard of a skin disease among
any savage tribes who were at all cleanly,
like our Indians and the New Zealand
ers. This I attribute ns much to their
not using soap as to their outdoor exer
cise. " If the ladies could be induced to dis
card it from their toilets, and supply it
place with ammonia, finer and clearer
complexions would be the result.
"A little ammonia in the water is
quite ns effectual ns soap, nnd has not
the injurious effect of the latter.
"After th- ablutions an excooding'y
fresh. so't appearance mnv be given by
nn nppl'cation of oatmeal. If the oat
meal is moistened nnd left to dry upon
the face, and then dusted off with a soft
woolen cloth, the skin will have a much
more delicate and natural-looking bloom
than can be given by the most highly
priced cosmetic.
"Now that it is fashionable to be
healthy, every lady should more thnn
ever before seek for those aids which
will improve herself physically.
"So much has been said about the
efficacy of cold water that thousands
have made a loo lavish use of it. thereby
sowing the -eeds of disease. Although
a bath should always fee cool to the
bodv.lt should never feel c Id.
" A cold bath is a powerful stimulant,
and like other stimulants, should be
used sparingly. From eighty to ninety
degrees Fahrenheit is about the right
temporal ure for a bath.
" Very coarse towels or brushes should
never be applied to a healthy skin. Al
though the towels should be moderately
coarse, the friction should be given by
the hands.
, sponge bnth every morning, accord
ing to these directions, will much im
prove the health. Instead of a feeling
of lassitude there wiil be one of quick
ened vitality, nnd the good looks will pe
naturally increased." (Pittsburgh Lead
er. A Case of Telepathy.
Dr. S. J. Levlek was si'ting in his 11
br .ry u.'.kii g with a friend, and in -i-dent
lly ihe subject turned upon tele
pathy. He had bee i illustrating it bvane.- iotes
of wha; he had noticed in hospital prac
tice, and in thi way the subject "' the
;reat lire of ls,"0 in Philadelphia was
brought up
He spoke of tie? fact that it originated
from an . xplosion of altpnre in Brock's
warcho i e, an I remarked:
'This gave rise i o tho question, will
s i!t pctre explode?"
He had i.o' sp ikon or thought o' this
ma! ter before for twenty years.
The Olivers .t '': rove ting to te'epathy
ll wa- explained by saying;
"Now, if what we are talking alout
should be i.i, crest. ng anoth r mind, as
there is nothing to -suggest it, that woull
be telepai hy."
The conversation broke up ab.nit mid
night, the friend going home and Dr.
LevicK rei ii ing.
The next day each accidentally took
up an evening paper an I read the follow
ing pa rnir q.n :
"There used to be a tun h vexed
question in Philadelphia as to the ex
plosive nature of sa It p-tre,gro ing . .in of
the explosion at Brock's sioiv. iu Water
str et, in Win. Now that a hrew.-ry nm
beenbiown up by an explos on of oa meal,
l he old quest inn comes up n a new lurui :
Will iagei beer explode ?' "
While they were talking, somo one,
unknown to either of them, iv- penu.r.g
the paragraph m question. I'linadelpiua
Times.
No TTse for the Jewel.
Y'oung Housekeeper (to fish dealer) :
"What do you charge for terrapin?"
Dealer: " The diamond backs are $49
a dozen, mum."
Young Housekeeper: "Well, haven't
you got any without diamonds ou their
backs that come cL caper ?"
AFP ETIZERS.
Tmkota Court I'rocerdingv.
A man was recently arrested on a
charge of stealing. An officer brought
him before a Dakota justice of the peace,
when the prisoner said :
".lodge I obj. set to this; I want to
be let ofl for a w hile."
" l'ris tiers' ohj.-cVuns ain't pener'ly
Colfideri'd very hefty by 1 bis Court,
replied the Jlistjee. sareast btl lly.
" Yes, bgt I'm illin' to be trn-d. but I
wan' to git off for jist a little while."
"No, sir! The law must take her
co'rse ev'ry time."
" Can't let ine off half on hour?"
" Not if the Court knows herself.
" But you .. Judge, I J, ad jid struck
a man out here for a trade on my near
hoss when th off cer"
" Which 'uu did vou say the sor'l?"
" Yes."
" Why, Jones, I can give you a darned
good trade if you want something to
match thut off 'hoss o' yourn. This
Court is adtimed till P-mornr at 10
o'clock come out to the barn and look
over my roan mare." Estelliue iDak.j
Bell.
Hope Sprlnjj, I'teriiMl, Ktc.
An old maid ut least seventy years of
age was he!od into a chair in the office
of a New York police justice She was
very much iM-iti-d.
" I I understand you to say that
you think your j-ocket was picked by a
young man who sat alongside of you
in a Third avenue car?" ns-ked the
justice.
" Yes. I'm sure of it. He squeezed
me up in the corner so that i could
scarcely breathe, and he kept smiling
at me, and smiling at me, as if he
knew me."
" Why did you permit blni to do that?
Why did you not complain to the con
ductor'"' ask'-d the justice.
" I I "
" Out with it."
" I thought perhaps he was
was "
" Wus what?"
" Going to propose to me." Texas
Sifting.
Yontli. Age and Knowledcp.
"Yes, sir." said Jones to Smith, "as
men grow in age and experience, they
advance in knowlelge."
" I don t 11. ink so, replied Smith.
" 1. ti t 1 1 it:k so? That 's rat her singu
lar. The opinion I hold on the subject
is the universal opinion."
"It maybe, but I have my own opin
ion, nevertheless, nnd it is that the
younger we are the more we know
When I was a youth I knew- twice as
much as my father. Now I am aged
and I don't know half as much as my
son." Boston Courier.
" CircuinnttuiiY Alter Case,."
" No. sir; I haven't seen the will, but
I propose to fight it. My uncle was
crazier than a loon and cul.lu't make
a will."
Lawyer Filchem : " But I drew it up
for him. and know that he bequeaths
bis entire estate to y.m."
"Is that so? 1 ben just o insider your
self retained to defend t he in-t i n ni.-nt.
I propose to protect niy d.-ar nude's
nn-morv to tlip furthest cxtremitv."
Philadelphia Press.
from the .Learned City.
New Yorker ito Boston young wofnnn) :
" Shall we take a bobtail "cai. Miss pen a.
lope?"
Miss IVm-lope; "What, is a "bobtail"
car, Mr. Sniit h ?"
New Yolkoi : " One draw n by a singlo
horse and without a conductor. Don't
you ha e thei i in Boston '?''
Mii-M pone. ope: "Oit, ye-; but wo
call them Darwinian cars." (New Yolk
Times.
. o .
Importance of Manner.
Mat ners are of more impm-iane" than
laws. ( poll I lo se, iu a gi.-.ai ;:. M-:ire.
th -law- .i. p. lei. The law . ajiies us
here iiini t' erti, now aii'ilh :i.
Mm" it- an win-it e" ! s .othe or
corr.pt or ...r.i. . cxill oi .a-e b-tr-
ba r ze . i i e i i :
uiiilorm. ii s.
of tn a r . e :
The. - iv - i
to our ii v s.
th y aid m ii
they totally
B ike.
.- us. : y nin-l, in. s.o.i .y,
n-. .e operation ins u.it
Te lliie i 1.
o ir a hole f.-rii! .Hid .-t .jr
.V. eoi .li: g to t ii if n.a lty
a.s, tney Miipv a.s, er
i-estloy them. - t i.ti:uui: J
A Good Itenaon.
Teacher: "Now, Susio, you may read
the next Tfr-."
Susie: "Cast thy bread upon the
waters."
Teacher: "Susie, why should we cast
our bread upon the waters?"
Susje; "To feed th fishes, ma'am."
Pittsburg Chronicle.
Allowances 1 list he Made.
A Scotch lady, nt her daughter's wed
ding, was nsked by an old fiind whether
she luight congratulate her on the
event.
" Yes. yes," replied the mother, "upon
the whole it is very satisfactory. It f
true Jcarii-' hat her pood man, but
then there's alwavs a something !"
A Neighborly SiiKpe.tion.
"Good mornitig, Neigh'x.r Pratt," said
a not overpopular man to another a
they mot on the street. "Dojnu know
I'm going out of town to 1' gone two
weeks?"
" Good !" was the quick reply; "I am
plad to hear it. Why can't you make it
four weeks?" Hnrpor's Bazar.
Madam loteution.
Second Husband ito wifci : " Are you
as fond of me as you were of your fast
hu'-band. dear?"
Wife: " Ye:, indeed : and if you were
to die. John. I would be jut in- fond of
niy third. I'm not a woman to inany
for anything but love." (New Yoik
Sun.
raternal.
"What relation. I'.obl y." said Mr
Dobbin to his first lorn, "am I to
your mother's father?"
Bobby: He is your fodder."
"Nonsense; how can he be that?"
" Fodder is what folks Jive on, ain't
it?" Bingham ton Republican.
A SufMeieiit Reason.
Said she: "I'd like veiy much tknow
Why the men uo not propose?"
Said "be: "It's 'cause their salary
wouldn't go
Ycrv far towards buyirg a woman's
"clothes." iCl.iiHg" Telegram.
" No Sneh Word a Fall."
"There's no such word as fail,"
said nn oil gentleman t his son
whoso business w as w rring b'T'l.
' That's so. father "' was ti - hopeful
response. "I gue-s 1 11 make an ass.jii
ruent." -Merchant Traveler.
. . e
Johnnie's Arithmetic.
Teacher: " If vour P.' her gives you
j five applee nnd .vur bmtber gives you
three, bow main have you.' '
Johnnie: " I guess, enough for one
day."
A xd 1-de-av.
It isn't necessary to be a millionaire
to en iov 1 his p .'.
$i : win provide a great maty
cornl- j6.